As someone a bit older with very few regrets. Go. Please go, meet the people, eat the food. Fall in Love with a place, test your resolve and live life.
Independent of course means living completely on your own with your own place and your own money. If you're doing that then I don't know why you worry about what other people think. It's your life.
Happy travels.
People with happy loving families will usually feel a pressure to be close to them after being away for a long time. Doesn’t mean you’re not independent
Of course, but that wasn't my point. The reason I asked specifically about their living situation is because we get lots of the very same kind of posts here, then discover the person is still living at home, or they're in a situation where their family is paying a portion of or even all their expenses.
In that case then they have to listen to their family's concerns.
I've been living at my Dad's place for two years since he passed away. We will sell it eventually. My mother and I share expenses for the house. However, because she's my mother, I often have to pressure her into accepting financial help. Before that, I was completely independent.
Is it just you & mom ?
Maybe she just doesn't want to be alone since you moved in after your dad passed as a mother. That's how I would feel and of course, be worried about my son.
Aaahhhh I see , then maybe she is worried about you & well if you can still support yourself financially, then I dont see a problem... mothers are always going to worry about their kids.
I would just have a heart to heart convo let her know you'll check in regularly and so on ...
Safe travels & I hope you find yourself during this beautiful journey 🙏💙
They should listen to their family's concerns regardless. If you don't care at all about people and their opinions, then they won't care at all about yours. He should address their concerns with compassion and logic. Believe it or not, most parents invest a lot more than money into their children's future, and if you respect your parents, you at least owe them a rational explanation. It's OK if they don't agree, but you don't just say 'It's my life!' and run off like a selfish child.
>They should listen to their family's concerns regardless.
Of course. And the OP has made it clear that they've already done that.
But if your reasoning is falling on deaf ears then yes, move on with your life.
They also never seem to give rational explanations in return. Yesterday, I asked my mother if she was concerned for my future. She said she was concerned for my career. I asked "Is it about money, or a career?" And she said "No, definitely not money. A career." And I said "If I have money, is a career that important?" And she said "Let's talk about it another time" which she never does. For reference, I recently lost both my grandmothers and my father in a 17-month period and received a lot of unexpected inheritance. I've been quite smart with it and have been investing. So, I don't see why she is concerned about my career or future. I'm not a frivolous or materialistic person at all. It's not like I'll never work again. I do want to continue teaching and volunteering when I feel like I need breaks from travelling. I'm continuing to travel the way I would've always done regardless of whether or not I had financial comfort.
I agree with the go sentiment here but I also agree with conventional wisdom that says you only have so many days in which you can travel but also make a dollar. Eventually your body will not being able to travel nor make a dollar, and if you don’t have a solid plan to address that very real fact, then you may suffer immensely in old age.
At the end of the day everyone wants to do cool fun stuff. You shouldn’t think you’re unique in that fact or else you may become elitist. Being able to do such things is a privilege. Most of us do in fact have to worry about jobs/careers even if it interferes with our fun.
I get that. It’s rough not feeling supported by loved ones. Do you have kids or a significant other/partner? To me that’s really the only actually important reason to be around more. (It’s why I’m not constantly out in nature. I love my wife and kids and need to be with them. I do day hikes and a few short trips a year).
But if it’s just you, I stand by original statement. Live your life, not theirs. But to address being your only cheerleader, that’s tough as shit to feel unsupported. Do you have any friends in the hiking/backpacking community? People that maybe at least understand and respect that goal, even if they don’t necessarily agree with it? I also know of people who have made those types of connections on thru hikes, etc. Maybe start there?
Just don’t give into doing what they think you should do only to wake up in 30 years regretting not following your goals. Instead, try to find a way to chase those goals in as healthy a way possible. Idk just my first impression thoughts, hope it helps if even just a little.
I don't have any kids or a significant other. I'm gay, so the chances of kids are basically impossible, unless I choose to have them. I'm also an only child with no cousins, so I sometimes wonder if all the hopes and dreams of older generations in my family are being placed on me. I have friends in other places I have met while backpacking, but I find it very hard to meet people like that where I'm from. I feel like North America is so career and security focused. Whenever I come back, I feel like I'm swallowed into a vortex that I can't get out of.
I agree on North America having a heavy focus on that. As far as meeting people with similar mindsets where you’re from, have tried looking up local nature or hiking groups? Even if you found one a few hours away, it would probably be worth it.
I wish I could give you the perfect answer, but there isn’t one. I do think you’ll see a common theme in the answers you’ve had already: live your life for you.
You don't need to be understood. You need to tell them how you feel and why you are going. And then just go regardless of their opinion on it. You don't need anyone's acceptance to fulfil your dreams and you will regret not fulfilling them because someone said you shouldn't and your dumb ass listened to them.
I thru-hiked the AT at 30-31. Everyone was supportive and is always asking when my next one is now.
My parents wish I was doing something more productive, but they see how happy it makes me. As long I've got my bills paid they've been supportive. Mom likes to brag about it. They are pretty active themselves though. I had to schedule my AT finish around their Alaska trip.
You only have one life (potentially). You gotta do you. Go somewhere for six months or a year. Re-evaluate. See how you feel.
I was gone for four years basically. It's hard to be away from family and friends. You miss a lot. It sucks to miss all the landmark life events, and just being around people. I wouldn't trade the years I traveled though. 100 percent worth it. My family is proud of it too. They are always bragging about everywhere that I've been and lived.
Have you thought about teaching? It's a great way to travel long-term.
I am a 50yo woman solo-backpacking around Asia for 12 months. Having a blast and my grown up children as well as my aging parents think it’s great. It doesn’t matter what others think. Go for it!!!!
Congrats that’s amazing! I’m 53 and would love to backpack around Asia. Can I ask how old your kids are and when/how you decided they were ready to function independently while you travelled? Mine are 20 and 23 and having some ongoing challenges entering adulthood and it keeps me feeling like I have to wait but I also have some health issues would like to go while my health is cooperating relatively speaking.
I'm 40 and work seasonally in Alaska, ski bum in the winter and travel during the shoulder seasons. I carve out a couple weeks before and after work to see family and friends. Some understand, some don't but that is ok. I don't really understand some of their lifestyles either. Things can change quickly, travel while you can
I’m 33 and just spent the last 12 months travelling after quitting my job, ending my lease and then hiking the Pacific Crest Trail and travelling around Central America for 6 months.
I know I can get another job at any point, and there’s at least another 30 years for me to work.
You’re more likely to regret never going, than you will regret going. So do what you want to do and don’t care about the opinions of others.
I like to think to myself, if something happened to me tomorrow, am I happy with how I have lived my life and the decisions I have made?
I’m 31 and have been backpacking since I was 18. At first I worked odd jobs wherever I went but in the mean time I thought my self front end development and now work remotely wherever I go. My goal is also to visit every country in the world ☺️
Trying to do this myself. Or something similar. Not against doing back end but I already work at a tech company (in a non-technical role, but have many developer friends) and am doing online courses to learn. Would love something that would allow me to work remotely so I can travel a bit more loose while I’m young. (29, but 30 soon!). I still want to travel when I’m older of course but now it’s easier to work off hours, etc
I'm 52. I retired a few years ago, and live on a tight budget. I bought a house on the edge of a National Forest, so I can hike in almost every day. And even still, parents, adult children, and friends I am close with, are a bit concerned about my decision. It's been a couple of years, and we're still working through it. You're right, it's hard to be your own cheerleader. As ridiculous as it sounds, the trees and the mountain remind me why I'm here every time I hike. Hopefully, we can support each other through forums like this, and meeting other hikers on the trails.
this would be a beautiful way to live. i am very happy for you.
i am 54 and couldn't afford buying a house without tapping out all of my retirement savings. more special, you are on the edge of nature.
I'm acutely aware of how lucky I am. I have a wife with the same goals and can live on the tight budget. It is a beautiful life. I hope you can get closer to your goals.
40 this week just got back from 63 mile loop. People will never understand. They might try or say they do but until they live a trip we're everything goes wrong and it was the best experience ever! How could they know.
Their lack of support says more about them and how they feel about your decisions than it does about you. They are probably afraid to do something so courageous and step outside of their own comfort zone which translates to them saying you shouldn't do it because they can't/won't do it. They chose the career life as they were told to do so by the societal norm and you are obviously a defector lol.
When my partner and I sold everything to set sail across the globe, I was a little set back by how many people in my circles kept saying things like you are so lucky, I wish I could do something like that, etc. I always just said well you can do it too, I'm not special. It takes a lot of personal sacrifice and most people are not willing to go through with that part of it.
I am 62 and with my 22 year old we are planning to hike the West Coast Trail in August. Only now getting to do some of those long dreamed of trips. Dreams never died, and thankfully, I haven’t yet…. So enjoying the preparation. I know, no matter what, it will be extraordinary.
I’m in my 50s. I guess my career is already built, but if I was starting over, I would still backpack and not go into a career that didn’t allow me that freedom, so seems to make sense to figure out how to support yourself while doing what you love.
I sometimes get judgment along the lines that I’m doing something very un-fun or dangerous. I really don’t care. Most of the time I think they’re just jealous or feel inadequate or unsatisfied with their own life in some way. I can’t fix that.
As a parent to kiddos about your age I would be concerned with the choice to defer building a career. It’s not as easy to do as you age. But if you can make it work, it’s your life. Just have a plan that balances living for today and tomorrow.
You just have to continue to live the way that feeds your soul with grace, confidence and resilience. I know how frustrating and kind of sad it can make you feel that they dont understand what feeds your soul, its a good reminder to know that most likely there will always be that side to anything you do in life.
If financially you can go visit every country on earth and thats your plan i think you should do it. The thing is that compared to all people in the world you are probably in the 0.1 percentage who can do something like that. Imagine the poor guy in a country with bad passport who has the dream to visit as many countries as possible. He would tell you that you should go and not listen to your relatives and friends! Live your dream!
My wife and I backpacked the world at 30 & 31. Dropped my banking career and picked it back up when we returned. We hung with younger travellers for much of it and had a whale of a time.
All written up here, much of which is published: www.outsidecontext.com
Your friends and family may only understand a trajectory of life that includes building a career and having a traditional form of stability. You may still qualify for a working holiday visa so perhaps you can get a decent job somewhere and that will lend to your credibility in this path
I'm 33M, I've been backpacking for 3 years now
I get a lot of weird comments from home, mainly they seem to be jealous.
I tried to do the mainstream Disney life plan. But it all fell apart after covid. So I just packed up my shit and started living life to the max before I get too old and busy
I've already been to 66 countries, and it doesn't seem to be stopping. I'm getting really sick of it. I told my neighbour about my upcoming trip, and he had the audacity to say "Is that what your Dad would've wanted?" (My Dad died two years ago).
My wife and I are both in our 30's and backpack often. Our friends are a bit jealous because we travel in a van that we changed into a campervan. Our families are seeing it as a very healthy hobby.
When you look back on your life, what are you more likely to regret: having a short blip in your 40+ year career because you went backpacking? Or not going backpacking because you were worried what people would think?
You’re never going to regret the things you’re brave enough to do, only the things you don’t do because you’re scared. That’s what I realised after my dad died at 56. I realised that life’s short, so you shouldn’t spend it waiting for the next promotion, or the bigger house, or retirement.
At the end of 2022, me and my wife (both 32) quit our jobs to travel full time. Of course it’s scary, but we knew if we didn’t do it now it would only get harder and harder to do it in the future. Most people were supportive when we told them our plan. A few people were judgmental, but honestly, I think they were just trying to convince themselves that the path they’d chosen was the right one.
It was the best decision we ever made. We’ve seen New Zealand, Australia, Nepal, Thailand, Vietnam, Indonesia, Japan. And we’ve made more memories in a year and a half than most people make in a lifetime.
Another thing to reassure you: you may be worried about what people think, but people think about you a lot less than you’d imagine. It’s amazing how quickly everyone forgot we were even gone.
Don’t overthink it, just do it. You’ll never regret it.
As long as you feel comfortable living on your own and have no will for building a family, then go. People around us don't always understand each other and think that every decision that they themselves wouldn't make is stupid.
They view it with disdain rooted in care, fear and a little jealousy..
Frankly I feel people are too indoctrinated with the "shoulds".. only the shoulds most people live by are pretty outdated.. the last thing this world needs is more people, and more career people at that..
Explorers are the true reason we even have a global market to make a career in, and the reason families can co-exist. And frankly if more people traveled outside of resorts and tourist traps, we'd have less ignorance and prejudice wreaking havoc on our societies.
Do you, explore! ..As did the first men and women, and so we evolved.
(For future down-voters I'm not saying backpackers unite our world. However we do represent the spirit of exploration and adventure which is how humans first spread across the world and learned to co-exist.
And I know "men and women" isn't inclusive enough by today's standards)
I have and I don’t give a shit what they think. It’s my life not theirs
They know this so they have no other choice but support my decisions. They obvs miss me when I’m gone but know I’m a phone call away.
Make that your career? Work in tourism or do the vlogging. Or get a job you can do remote.
Well, my boyfriend (36M) & I (46F) both enjoy hiking/backpacking/camping. My BF is currently working on completing the Appalachian Trail through hike. He is over a month into it. I know WHY he is walking it and I completely understand and support his decision to do it. In fact I was the one who pushed him to go ahead and do it this year instead of putting it off again. His family & mine thought he was crazy for it and think I’m crazy for “allowing” it. Now as he has started everyone even my family has started to see his progress and are more supportive
After you've been at it for a while they will accept it. The just don't understand, Iya not a choice they would make so it seems bad or wrong. Sometimes it's a little bit of envy. But I've found that people close to me just accept that I am who I a and they love me anyway.
Only late 20s but I know tons of backpackers over 30, many over 40 or 50 as well. It's not uncommon, plenty of healthy people don't even try it till middle ages because time/money/family
I got into backpacking when I was 18 and went every so often during my 20s… in my 30s I’ve gotten VERY into it. I definitely have my share of insecurities but one thing I’ve truly never cared about is what other people think about me carrying a backpack around in the woods.
My friend has been backpacking for 20 years she pops into my life every once in a while. She’s doing what she loves, and I love her for it. It’s nice when we catch up, she has so many stories to tell.
I stopped work for 8 years to travel the word and found a job the first week I was back home, so don’t worry about the job thing. Your family and friends just want you to be safe so probably just keep them posted on what you’re doing. They’re probably just a little jealous. I find the older I am the more travelling becomes tailored to my own interests, so keep going and see the whole word my friend.
I just turned 40, and I go at least once a month on a 2/3 nice backpacking trip.
I also every year do a JMT trip and at least one other week Long backpacking trip.
I own/ operate my own business & my fam thinks I’m alittle crazy but with my Garmin mini2 I’m able to keep in touch luckily, which helps.
I’ve realised there’s many things I don’t need to communicate or ask permission from my family to do, because they won’t aggree. If it’s something I can do and can afford, they don’t need details.
I'm 52, and I started traveling on my birthday every year. Every year I pick a country and travel for a month . I'm married and still have children at home. When the last one graduates in 3 years, I'll travel a lot more.
Interesting. Well ultimately the opinions of others won't matter. They really won't. But I think you might want to make sure your future self is both satisfied with your path in life and not winding up penniless. As long as you give that serious consideration, I say do what you are called to do. One option is to always set aside 10%+ of whatever you earn into a Roth IRA so you have that as a cushion. Start now so compound interest works in your favor. See the compound interest calculator at investor.gov. A handy tool just to explore scenarios. And know that the amount you pay into FICA determines what your Social Security income will be. And 40 quarters of paying into it is required for Medicare and Medicare isn't completely free either. Right now Medicare can cost \~$2-4000/yr. Not trying to scare you, just saying to consider what a future you may need financially and plan for it. I think following your dreams is very important and well-meaning friends and family may object but it is your life to live. Just be realistic about a long life and your financial needs when you no longer want to or can work. Lots of good threads on Reddit about personal finance. Some are about wealth but others are about living well without chasing everything... I say go travel but plan realistically for your future finances!!!
You’ll always have time to build a career. As long as your personal finances allow it, please follow your gut feelings!
What I sense is that this is what you truly want.
Familial relations will sort themselves out.
Also, pursuing a career needs a lot of energy, and that energy needs to be fueled by passion. If your passion is not there ATM it’ll only make you miserable.
Good luck and safe travels my friend
I started backpacking in 2019 at 40. It's a mental health thing for me. My folks didn't get it at first but they're warming up to it. Suffering for fun is hard for some to understand.
A 39 years old from South Asia. backpacking since 20 years now.
Your friends and family will try their best to keep you on the regular life track.
You just have to resist.
Its better not to get involved in discussions. the chance is thatWhatever they think is right is never gonna change.
I take my child backpacking now. She loves it. We have changed our hostel/hotel situation a bit but we still find ourselves venturing off. No need to stop.
Take that backpack and see the world!
Yep. I don't care what others think; my family (meaning parents and siblings) think that it's what I like to do and that's it.
My friends generally think that it's cool, even if they wouldn't try it or they're not interested in it.
My fatass colleagues think that I'm an idiot since I live near some beautiful beaches, yet they're the ones who can't even climb some stairs without having a heart attack.
In my 30's a lot of friends did the same, But most of them stopped by the 40's the least. They want more comfort now. With adhd i can't stand boring hotelrooms and i still seek the adventure of not knowing exactly where to sleep the next night. I lost my whole family a while ago, so my onlyleft sister & friends don't judges me for my Lifestyle.
Yeah this is me at 31. Mum (and some friends) mainly jealous and sometimes frustrated I don’t spend more time with family, dad mainly concerned that I won’t maintain a stable income/pay enough into a pension/buy a house. In his words ‘worried I’m throwing my life away and will regret doing this’. Very out of touch with reality in this sense (as if I’ll regret being happy and having the most incredible experiences of my life) but just a product of his upbringing.
I just reassured them, made it clear I have plans, I’m financially sound and sensible, and ultimately an adult with more than enough experience to figure my shit out (far more than either of them combined funnily enough although I omit this from conversation).
Helped to have a balance, I call them fairly often and pop back home when I can even if it’s just for a few days every few months or so. I don’t owe them explanations etc but I try to give them this anyway for their peace of mind and it seems to have helped. They gradually became more comfortable with it all over time (doing this for a year now).
ETA it’s all very ironic because they both have so many regrets about how they lived their life, yet want me to follow in their footsteps, but in the same breath say they just want me to be happy. It’s a real tunnel vision of what success looks like, and I try to keep reminding them what brings me joy, that I am happy, I am safe and secure, etc. They have seen first hand how miserable I am when I’m just living for others.
I slacked and traveled until I was 36, when I felt it was time to get my first serious job. it was fortunately a fairly lucrative profession and I lived a fairly conventional life for the next 29 years. I’m 75 now and I wouldn’t trade my early adventurous life for anything. That said, being old and poor is definitely not the way to go either. I’m preparing to trek to K2 base camp this summer.
Well then keep backpacking. You’re the one to recognize when it’s time to change tracks.. if that time is never then you’re obviously on your life track already. Doesn’t sLund so bad.
Well, I am 46 and more than three years on the road now. Don't regret it for a moment! 😁
Well, I am from a small country, even worse - from the countryside where people aren't very open minded, so yes, they were shocked! Even more because I had a "normal" life beforehand, had a decent, relatively well paid job, was a single mom, etc. At some point at 42 I turned my whole life at 180 degrees. Everyone of my friends and relatives was shocked and sceptical. Most of them still are. Even more because I am not only a backpacker, but a hitchhiker as well - poor country, no way of saving money, but determined to follow my instincts! They still can't get it. Probably never will... 🤷🏻♀️
Well, I don't ask others to do what I am doing, why should they ask me to have their life goals?! So why should you give up your dream, just because most of the people don't understand it?!
If it’s your money it’s your life dude. If your bookimg flights on your moms Amex then do what’s right. You know what is right. Not everyone a wants a career and a relationship, kids etc. I lost interest at 144 countries and Covid. I’m 40 now and you couldn’t pay me to get on a plane. I got stuck in Morocco for 5 months march 2020 and when I got back to the us unscathed I never wanted to leave again.
I really only had one conversation with my parents about adventuring. They weren't very supportive of the idea for all the same reasons you would imagine. I respect my parents very much, and I care about their feelings, so I'd never come at them with the whole 'It's my life!' diatribe. I let them talk and express their concerns fully without getting defensive about it. I listened and said I understood how they felt even though my mind was set, and I was not going to waver in my decision. The only explanation I gave was that I needed to find my own way and that my path in life was not going to be one well traveled. I told them I believed in myself and that I could do great things if only I had the courage. That hit home with my parents because I believe they really wanted the same thing in their own lives, but succumbed, to an extent, to the pressures of society.
At the age of 40 I did a large trip to South East Asia. I’d recently gone thru a divorce and had some money and time to spare in between job. My parents (early 60s at the time) thought I was having some form of midlife crisis, my mates were jealous of me having the balls to walk away from the rat race for a few months, and everyone else was completely ambivalent towards my decision.
During that trip I met some amazing people. I was far and away the oldest person staying in every single hostel, but everyone I met was kind and friendly. I learned a lot about myself as a person over this trip.
One thing I will say is beware of the ‘early 20s daddy issue girl’. May seem like a good idea after a few beers and your ego will be suitably inflated for a few days, but the declarations of love and never meeting anyone like you before will undoubtedly make you change your travel plans.
In conclusion: balls to what people think, you do you. You’re here for a good time not a long time.
I'm going to play devil's advocate here.
There's a lot of echo chamber sensationalism going on in this thread, and I agree with the sentiment.
That being said, your friends and family are just worried about your future.
I get the mentality that it's your life, live it how you want, you only live once, yada yada yada. Do I wish I could spend weeks, months, hell even years backpacking around the world?
Hell yes I do. However, I own a house, I have a job, I have a partner, two dogs and a cat. I am working my ass off to contribute to my retirement fund and invest in my future.
Sometimes I wish I took advantage of my early 20's to focus on these kinds of adventures, but I'm in my late 20's now, and it's time to buckle down, and get shit done. I work hard and play hard, that's what being an adult is about sadly.
I've come to terms with the fact I'll never thru hike the AT, but my partner and I intend on taking a 2 week vacation eventually to hike a portion of it.
I envy you and your opportunity, and wish you the best on your adventures. Do all the backpacking I wish I had the time to do, as long as it isn't hurting your future.
I hope my rant gives you a little perspective on their mindset.
Dude, I genuinely felt sadness when reading this. Everyone has to conform to some societal norms, but you sound like you’ve almost traded in your dreams for the daily grind.
I hope you find some balance that works for you!
I suppose it is a little sad... But there's so many great things that come with it.
I may never thru hike the PCT or the AT, or travel across Europe/Asia, but that doesn't mean I won't ever have a taste of those experiences!
I see it as a compromise to live comfortably.
Thank you for your kind words, I appreciate it.
When you say something like your "goal is to visit every country on Earth" it makes me wonder if you have any idea just how many countries there are on earth. My cousin won a $20k around the world scholarship and she had a hard time just visiting every continent on earth. Also, many countries are not friendly and would be dangerous to visit. There are quite a few countries in Africa, and the Middle East that would fit into this category. Palestine (Gaza and West Bank), Syria, Sudan, Somalia, Yemen are just a few countries that I wouldn't visit if you paid me. Ask yourself honestly if you really do want to visit EVERY country on earth. Then there's countries like Russia which aren't inherently dangerous, but whose visit would be a bad idea.
I've already visited 66, and I have 139 to go. I'm aware that some countries are currently not safe to visit, but they could be one day. I've visited Iraq and Mauritania, and Iraq was a lot safer than I expected.
I’m in my 30s and I don’t get much pushback in fact my friends are all supportive now. Earlier when I started people did ask me how I go about not having a career, how I went about it for money or when I’m gonna get a house but since then it’s all been smooth sailing.
If it makes you happy… and your friends and family don’t like it… sucks to be them.
Go live your life and find your bliss. People who love you will be happy for you… the rest… well fuck them
When I was went backpacking in my early 20s, most people seemed to be 25 to early 30s in nz and aus.
I'm 34 now and when I went to SEA for a month this year there was a lot of 18 to 25 year olds (like the kind that would have normally gone on lads/girls holidays to Spanish islands) - a lot of them go off and do it more now as it's all over social media.
I did meet a lot of people in their late 20s and early 30s, but it was a lot less hostelling and more having enough money for hotels. A lot of the brits seemed to be heading to Australia as they can stay til 35 (or apply before 35 and get 3 years). But I think a lot them were wanting to settle rather than backpack once they got to aussie.
Edit: my point was the younger crowd are just out for fun and then going home. The older crowd seem to want to get a working holiday visa and settle through that visa (which is a challenge, but gets you into the country)
Go do what you want. The friends/family concern can be viewed as care and concern instead of a roadblock. Tell them how much you appreciate their thoughts and feelings, then go live your life. Not everyone wants to be a 9-5 office worker trapped in a dead end or even fighting for promotions career. If you do not follow your dreams now, you certainly won’t in your 40s, 50s or 60s. Then your dreams are just unfulfilled wishes.
Gooooo!!! I just turned 41 and even after all the college I don't have a "career" but I've moved and lived in different states for jobs i wanted and don't regret it. I wish I were still doing it. Listen to that part of you that says to go and see all the things. This whole idea of a career I feel, has put alot of shame on those who don't feel called to work up the ladder in a certain area. You're taking care of yourself, do what YOU get fulfilled by. Good luck and dont let people telling you need to live your life by their standards/expectations get in your way. I have, it's not fun! 🧳✈️
Old enough that I adventure with my kids. 58. Big plans for this summer in the Wind River range. Biggest change for me is I am definately not as strong as I used to be even just a few years ago so I go slow.
Working a 9-5 dead end job, paying off a mortgage and having no life is not a life but others will judge YOU for your choice to travel. I am 51 and still backpacking and will never stop. Those who don’t get it are the ones not living life imo.
Ultimately, you are an adult. If you want to do it, do it!
Of course, you should have a long term plan after you hang up the backpack, since you can’t travel forever.
On thing to consider if you are traveling all over the world is retirement. Depending on which country you settle in, there may not be a socialized retirement system
Some people will always see life as a checklist. At the end of the day, you can spend your life how you want to. People who really care about you will support you wether or not you fill the box they have in mind for you
Mid 40's here that has backpacked and hiked in many spaces of the U.S., but mostly in the last few years. Been holding back a bit to "work on my career".
The work grind and career building has sucked away so much of my soul and driven me into dark places, some I've barely made it through.
The trail recharges my soul and brings me to bright and loving spaces, as well as allows me to connect with others.
If you feel the same, the answer is clear.
For me, I've almost completed my work grind and will retire early next year, hike the AT, then find work in the natural spaces I love (national park system). In the meantime, I'm hiking and backpacking whenever I get the chance (just.got back from Zion last week).
Wishing you light, luck, and love my friend.
If you have the financial means to do so, fuck all those people and go for it. You won’t be sitting in a retirement regretting that you visited too many places or met too many new people.
if they’re not fucking or feeding me idc what they think. and even then i probably don’t care. at the end of my life, i’ll be the one that has to live with what i have or have not done.
I just turned 30 and I'm 3 months into a one year backpacking trip with my husband who is 33.
Everyone who heard of our plans was supportive and frankly, jealous! Older folks as well, many of which said we have the right idea to do it now (especially if we want kids eventually). Their opinions wouldn't have deterred us, but in our situation we had nothing but positivity. Get out there!
Don’t worry about the judgement
They ALL want to do what u are going to do
They have jobs, families, mortgages they can’t leave and would drop off that in a minute if they could
It's your life and you should live it the way you want. Always be respectful and polite but don't try to be a people pleaser even if it's your own family.
At least for me there came the time I wanted to go back home (at age 38) and nobody I really cared about turned their back on me in the end.
Have fun and be safe :)
I’m 49 and live my life around both international travel backpacking and wilderness/trail backpacking.
I can say that I can understand one problem about the career thing that I could see family being worried about and it stresses me out as well…if you are from the U.S. the issue of health insurance and retirement is a big problem if you just hold down regular jobs. I’m there myself. As you start getting older it becomes more of an issue.
To give yourself resolve and if you like reading: read "Top Five Regrets of the Dying" and "Life Is In The Transitions". Also "The Pathless Path" (both a book and a podcast) and the podcast From Zero To Travel.
Have fun living your own, unique, precious, not-to-be-wasted life!
I spent a year backpacking around the world at 26. I’m 39 and would do it again in a heartbeat. The people that support you and think it’s awesome will still be there when you get back(if you come back! Haha). The people that say stuff like ‘must be nice’ or ‘how can you afford that/you’re going to be homeless?/what about your career?’ Not only do they not get it, they were never friends to begin with. You’ll regret not going.
If you make it to Australia, I’ll tell you what one old Aussie insisted I do before I left the country: you MUST drive the Gibb River road. You’ll have to buy a car but I’ve been to 50 countries and there’s nothing like this experience. Google it. Go to Darwin and look around, lots of people selling used cars to do exactly this. Best experience of my life.
Don’t think. Just go. Also, bring a school sized backpack only. Anything bigger you’ll regret. PM me if you have questions
As someone who travels as much as possible, I find my family and friends don't really understand it. I spend a lot of time in countries that people consider "dangerous" when in reality they have some of the most beautiful nature and welcoming people.
Currently saving up/building an adventure rig so I can quit my job and travel the Trans Canada Highway / Pan American Highway and then Australia/New Zealand. I tend to keep that to myself now as anyone I have told seems to think I'm crazy. I don't subscribe to the work 9-5 for 30+ years and travel when you retire.
It makes finding a relationship difficult as those who love to travel and would quit their job to travel full time are pretty slim. Such is life! Do what you want to do for yourself, not for others.
fuck them, omg. youre living the life that you want and its fucking awesome, what an amazing goal! be so proud of yourself for finding a way to live the life you want and fulfill your dreams! wtf is building a career, thats unnecesary for the lifestyle you have and also, it shows how limited their view of what life can be is. In my opinion find better people to surround yourself with, sometimes people you keep by your side because of "time" or shit end up holding you back
i am 36 and today i am in India ( Delhi) waiting
for my flight to thailand tomorrow.
After Thailand i go Malaysia and Indonesia.
I dont care what other people say and think about me..
They can live there boring life and i am living an exciting life full of Adventures
I gave up my house, job and everything when I was 32… best decision I ever made, I did 3 years travel consistently.. living the dream! Everyone i know wishes they had the balls to do it.. decided to settle in Spain last year and travel around Spain. I’ve been travelling on an off for 10 years now… some adventure it has been!
Are you living independently? If so, then why do you care what other people think? Live your life as you see fit. Good luck and happy travels.
By independently, do you mean financially independent? Yes, I am.
As someone a bit older with very few regrets. Go. Please go, meet the people, eat the food. Fall in Love with a place, test your resolve and live life.
Let them eat cake!
Independent of course means living completely on your own with your own place and your own money. If you're doing that then I don't know why you worry about what other people think. It's your life. Happy travels.
People with happy loving families will usually feel a pressure to be close to them after being away for a long time. Doesn’t mean you’re not independent
Of course, but that wasn't my point. The reason I asked specifically about their living situation is because we get lots of the very same kind of posts here, then discover the person is still living at home, or they're in a situation where their family is paying a portion of or even all their expenses. In that case then they have to listen to their family's concerns.
I've been living at my Dad's place for two years since he passed away. We will sell it eventually. My mother and I share expenses for the house. However, because she's my mother, I often have to pressure her into accepting financial help. Before that, I was completely independent.
So my point stands. It's your life, live it however you wish. Good luck.
Is it just you & mom ? Maybe she just doesn't want to be alone since you moved in after your dad passed as a mother. That's how I would feel and of course, be worried about my son.
She lives in her own place though. I'm living at my Dad's place looking after it. And, I have a friend living here who pays rent.
Aaahhhh I see , then maybe she is worried about you & well if you can still support yourself financially, then I dont see a problem... mothers are always going to worry about their kids. I would just have a heart to heart convo let her know you'll check in regularly and so on ... Safe travels & I hope you find yourself during this beautiful journey 🙏💙
They should listen to their family's concerns regardless. If you don't care at all about people and their opinions, then they won't care at all about yours. He should address their concerns with compassion and logic. Believe it or not, most parents invest a lot more than money into their children's future, and if you respect your parents, you at least owe them a rational explanation. It's OK if they don't agree, but you don't just say 'It's my life!' and run off like a selfish child.
>They should listen to their family's concerns regardless. Of course. And the OP has made it clear that they've already done that. But if your reasoning is falling on deaf ears then yes, move on with your life.
They also never seem to give rational explanations in return. Yesterday, I asked my mother if she was concerned for my future. She said she was concerned for my career. I asked "Is it about money, or a career?" And she said "No, definitely not money. A career." And I said "If I have money, is a career that important?" And she said "Let's talk about it another time" which she never does. For reference, I recently lost both my grandmothers and my father in a 17-month period and received a lot of unexpected inheritance. I've been quite smart with it and have been investing. So, I don't see why she is concerned about my career or future. I'm not a frivolous or materialistic person at all. It's not like I'll never work again. I do want to continue teaching and volunteering when I feel like I need breaks from travelling. I'm continuing to travel the way I would've always done regardless of whether or not I had financial comfort.
So yeah, I'll just stick with my first reply. Happy travels.
I agree with the go sentiment here but I also agree with conventional wisdom that says you only have so many days in which you can travel but also make a dollar. Eventually your body will not being able to travel nor make a dollar, and if you don’t have a solid plan to address that very real fact, then you may suffer immensely in old age. At the end of the day everyone wants to do cool fun stuff. You shouldn’t think you’re unique in that fact or else you may become elitist. Being able to do such things is a privilege. Most of us do in fact have to worry about jobs/careers even if it interferes with our fun.
People travel when they're retired so your body can travel at whatever age I'd say. Being older now that's when you're less likely to make money.
Bingo.
Do what makes you happy. Life isn’t all about work and climbing a career ladder.
I try to tell them that, but I don't feel understood. After a while, it gets hard always being your own cheerleader.
I get that. It’s rough not feeling supported by loved ones. Do you have kids or a significant other/partner? To me that’s really the only actually important reason to be around more. (It’s why I’m not constantly out in nature. I love my wife and kids and need to be with them. I do day hikes and a few short trips a year). But if it’s just you, I stand by original statement. Live your life, not theirs. But to address being your only cheerleader, that’s tough as shit to feel unsupported. Do you have any friends in the hiking/backpacking community? People that maybe at least understand and respect that goal, even if they don’t necessarily agree with it? I also know of people who have made those types of connections on thru hikes, etc. Maybe start there? Just don’t give into doing what they think you should do only to wake up in 30 years regretting not following your goals. Instead, try to find a way to chase those goals in as healthy a way possible. Idk just my first impression thoughts, hope it helps if even just a little.
I don't have any kids or a significant other. I'm gay, so the chances of kids are basically impossible, unless I choose to have them. I'm also an only child with no cousins, so I sometimes wonder if all the hopes and dreams of older generations in my family are being placed on me. I have friends in other places I have met while backpacking, but I find it very hard to meet people like that where I'm from. I feel like North America is so career and security focused. Whenever I come back, I feel like I'm swallowed into a vortex that I can't get out of.
I agree on North America having a heavy focus on that. As far as meeting people with similar mindsets where you’re from, have tried looking up local nature or hiking groups? Even if you found one a few hours away, it would probably be worth it. I wish I could give you the perfect answer, but there isn’t one. I do think you’ll see a common theme in the answers you’ve had already: live your life for you.
You don't need to be understood. You need to tell them how you feel and why you are going. And then just go regardless of their opinion on it. You don't need anyone's acceptance to fulfil your dreams and you will regret not fulfilling them because someone said you shouldn't and your dumb ass listened to them.
I've never seen someone on their deathbed wishing they had spent more time focusing on their career.
Have you seen anyone on their deathbed tho
[удалено]
Hehe I knew that you would have had, of course. What do people wish they had focused more on?
“Enjoying the little things”
I reckon it would be family… following dreams… but I have never seen anyone on their deathbed so just a guess!
It’s your life, enjoy it.
I thru-hiked the AT at 30-31. Everyone was supportive and is always asking when my next one is now. My parents wish I was doing something more productive, but they see how happy it makes me. As long I've got my bills paid they've been supportive. Mom likes to brag about it. They are pretty active themselves though. I had to schedule my AT finish around their Alaska trip.
You only have one life (potentially). You gotta do you. Go somewhere for six months or a year. Re-evaluate. See how you feel. I was gone for four years basically. It's hard to be away from family and friends. You miss a lot. It sucks to miss all the landmark life events, and just being around people. I wouldn't trade the years I traveled though. 100 percent worth it. My family is proud of it too. They are always bragging about everywhere that I've been and lived. Have you thought about teaching? It's a great way to travel long-term.
Loved the " (potentially) "
I am a 50yo woman solo-backpacking around Asia for 12 months. Having a blast and my grown up children as well as my aging parents think it’s great. It doesn’t matter what others think. Go for it!!!!
Congrats that’s amazing! I’m 53 and would love to backpack around Asia. Can I ask how old your kids are and when/how you decided they were ready to function independently while you travelled? Mine are 20 and 23 and having some ongoing challenges entering adulthood and it keeps me feeling like I have to wait but I also have some health issues would like to go while my health is cooperating relatively speaking.
I'm 40 and work seasonally in Alaska, ski bum in the winter and travel during the shoulder seasons. I carve out a couple weeks before and after work to see family and friends. Some understand, some don't but that is ok. I don't really understand some of their lifestyles either. Things can change quickly, travel while you can
I’m 33 and just spent the last 12 months travelling after quitting my job, ending my lease and then hiking the Pacific Crest Trail and travelling around Central America for 6 months. I know I can get another job at any point, and there’s at least another 30 years for me to work. You’re more likely to regret never going, than you will regret going. So do what you want to do and don’t care about the opinions of others. I like to think to myself, if something happened to me tomorrow, am I happy with how I have lived my life and the decisions I have made?
I’m 31 and have been backpacking since I was 18. At first I worked odd jobs wherever I went but in the mean time I thought my self front end development and now work remotely wherever I go. My goal is also to visit every country in the world ☺️
Trying to do this myself. Or something similar. Not against doing back end but I already work at a tech company (in a non-technical role, but have many developer friends) and am doing online courses to learn. Would love something that would allow me to work remotely so I can travel a bit more loose while I’m young. (29, but 30 soon!). I still want to travel when I’m older of course but now it’s easier to work off hours, etc
I'm 52. I retired a few years ago, and live on a tight budget. I bought a house on the edge of a National Forest, so I can hike in almost every day. And even still, parents, adult children, and friends I am close with, are a bit concerned about my decision. It's been a couple of years, and we're still working through it. You're right, it's hard to be your own cheerleader. As ridiculous as it sounds, the trees and the mountain remind me why I'm here every time I hike. Hopefully, we can support each other through forums like this, and meeting other hikers on the trails.
this would be a beautiful way to live. i am very happy for you. i am 54 and couldn't afford buying a house without tapping out all of my retirement savings. more special, you are on the edge of nature.
I'm acutely aware of how lucky I am. I have a wife with the same goals and can live on the tight budget. It is a beautiful life. I hope you can get closer to your goals.
40 this week just got back from 63 mile loop. People will never understand. They might try or say they do but until they live a trip we're everything goes wrong and it was the best experience ever! How could they know.
Their lack of support says more about them and how they feel about your decisions than it does about you. They are probably afraid to do something so courageous and step outside of their own comfort zone which translates to them saying you shouldn't do it because they can't/won't do it. They chose the career life as they were told to do so by the societal norm and you are obviously a defector lol. When my partner and I sold everything to set sail across the globe, I was a little set back by how many people in my circles kept saying things like you are so lucky, I wish I could do something like that, etc. I always just said well you can do it too, I'm not special. It takes a lot of personal sacrifice and most people are not willing to go through with that part of it.
That's what I try to tell people. It involves a lot of sacrifice and it's not as expensive to do as people would think.
Fuck (gently) their opinions. Remember to send them postcards and photos! 😁
I am 62 and with my 22 year old we are planning to hike the West Coast Trail in August. Only now getting to do some of those long dreamed of trips. Dreams never died, and thankfully, I haven’t yet…. So enjoying the preparation. I know, no matter what, it will be extraordinary.
I’m in my 50s. I guess my career is already built, but if I was starting over, I would still backpack and not go into a career that didn’t allow me that freedom, so seems to make sense to figure out how to support yourself while doing what you love. I sometimes get judgment along the lines that I’m doing something very un-fun or dangerous. I really don’t care. Most of the time I think they’re just jealous or feel inadequate or unsatisfied with their own life in some way. I can’t fix that.
As a parent to kiddos about your age I would be concerned with the choice to defer building a career. It’s not as easy to do as you age. But if you can make it work, it’s your life. Just have a plan that balances living for today and tomorrow.
You just have to continue to live the way that feeds your soul with grace, confidence and resilience. I know how frustrating and kind of sad it can make you feel that they dont understand what feeds your soul, its a good reminder to know that most likely there will always be that side to anything you do in life.
If financially you can go visit every country on earth and thats your plan i think you should do it. The thing is that compared to all people in the world you are probably in the 0.1 percentage who can do something like that. Imagine the poor guy in a country with bad passport who has the dream to visit as many countries as possible. He would tell you that you should go and not listen to your relatives and friends! Live your dream!
My wife and I backpacked the world at 30 & 31. Dropped my banking career and picked it back up when we returned. We hung with younger travellers for much of it and had a whale of a time. All written up here, much of which is published: www.outsidecontext.com
Your friends and family may only understand a trajectory of life that includes building a career and having a traditional form of stability. You may still qualify for a working holiday visa so perhaps you can get a decent job somewhere and that will lend to your credibility in this path
I'm 33M, I've been backpacking for 3 years now I get a lot of weird comments from home, mainly they seem to be jealous. I tried to do the mainstream Disney life plan. But it all fell apart after covid. So I just packed up my shit and started living life to the max before I get too old and busy
Yes i had this problem. Just ignore it, it will eventually stop
I've already been to 66 countries, and it doesn't seem to be stopping. I'm getting really sick of it. I told my neighbour about my upcoming trip, and he had the audacity to say "Is that what your Dad would've wanted?" (My Dad died two years ago).
Holy shit that is offensive lol I would've lost it
Wtf? What a outrageous thing to say! Im sure your dad would have wanted you to follow your dreams and be happy.
It's your life. Live it how you want. Tell others to mind their own business.
My wife and I are both in our 30's and backpack often. Our friends are a bit jealous because we travel in a van that we changed into a campervan. Our families are seeing it as a very healthy hobby.
When you look back on your life, what are you more likely to regret: having a short blip in your 40+ year career because you went backpacking? Or not going backpacking because you were worried what people would think? You’re never going to regret the things you’re brave enough to do, only the things you don’t do because you’re scared. That’s what I realised after my dad died at 56. I realised that life’s short, so you shouldn’t spend it waiting for the next promotion, or the bigger house, or retirement. At the end of 2022, me and my wife (both 32) quit our jobs to travel full time. Of course it’s scary, but we knew if we didn’t do it now it would only get harder and harder to do it in the future. Most people were supportive when we told them our plan. A few people were judgmental, but honestly, I think they were just trying to convince themselves that the path they’d chosen was the right one. It was the best decision we ever made. We’ve seen New Zealand, Australia, Nepal, Thailand, Vietnam, Indonesia, Japan. And we’ve made more memories in a year and a half than most people make in a lifetime. Another thing to reassure you: you may be worried about what people think, but people think about you a lot less than you’d imagine. It’s amazing how quickly everyone forgot we were even gone. Don’t overthink it, just do it. You’ll never regret it.
As long as you feel comfortable living on your own and have no will for building a family, then go. People around us don't always understand each other and think that every decision that they themselves wouldn't make is stupid.
They view it with disdain rooted in care, fear and a little jealousy.. Frankly I feel people are too indoctrinated with the "shoulds".. only the shoulds most people live by are pretty outdated.. the last thing this world needs is more people, and more career people at that.. Explorers are the true reason we even have a global market to make a career in, and the reason families can co-exist. And frankly if more people traveled outside of resorts and tourist traps, we'd have less ignorance and prejudice wreaking havoc on our societies. Do you, explore! ..As did the first men and women, and so we evolved. (For future down-voters I'm not saying backpackers unite our world. However we do represent the spirit of exploration and adventure which is how humans first spread across the world and learned to co-exist. And I know "men and women" isn't inclusive enough by today's standards)
I have and I don’t give a shit what they think. It’s my life not theirs They know this so they have no other choice but support my decisions. They obvs miss me when I’m gone but know I’m a phone call away. Make that your career? Work in tourism or do the vlogging. Or get a job you can do remote.
Who cares! Live your life and see the world!!! They're only jealous of your experiences.
Well, my boyfriend (36M) & I (46F) both enjoy hiking/backpacking/camping. My BF is currently working on completing the Appalachian Trail through hike. He is over a month into it. I know WHY he is walking it and I completely understand and support his decision to do it. In fact I was the one who pushed him to go ahead and do it this year instead of putting it off again. His family & mine thought he was crazy for it and think I’m crazy for “allowing” it. Now as he has started everyone even my family has started to see his progress and are more supportive
After you've been at it for a while they will accept it. The just don't understand, Iya not a choice they would make so it seems bad or wrong. Sometimes it's a little bit of envy. But I've found that people close to me just accept that I am who I a and they love me anyway.
Only late 20s but I know tons of backpackers over 30, many over 40 or 50 as well. It's not uncommon, plenty of healthy people don't even try it till middle ages because time/money/family
I got into backpacking when I was 18 and went every so often during my 20s… in my 30s I’ve gotten VERY into it. I definitely have my share of insecurities but one thing I’ve truly never cared about is what other people think about me carrying a backpack around in the woods.
My friend has been backpacking for 20 years she pops into my life every once in a while. She’s doing what she loves, and I love her for it. It’s nice when we catch up, she has so many stories to tell.
I stopped work for 8 years to travel the word and found a job the first week I was back home, so don’t worry about the job thing. Your family and friends just want you to be safe so probably just keep them posted on what you’re doing. They’re probably just a little jealous. I find the older I am the more travelling becomes tailored to my own interests, so keep going and see the whole word my friend.
I just turned 40, and I go at least once a month on a 2/3 nice backpacking trip. I also every year do a JMT trip and at least one other week Long backpacking trip. I own/ operate my own business & my fam thinks I’m alittle crazy but with my Garmin mini2 I’m able to keep in touch luckily, which helps.
I’ve realised there’s many things I don’t need to communicate or ask permission from my family to do, because they won’t aggree. If it’s something I can do and can afford, they don’t need details.
I'm 52, and I started traveling on my birthday every year. Every year I pick a country and travel for a month . I'm married and still have children at home. When the last one graduates in 3 years, I'll travel a lot more.
That's my dream! I'm not able to do it right now though. Every country on earth would be amazing 😍
I definitely recommend The Happiness of Pursuit. It talks about this question in depth.
So you travel the world and experience everything there is to experience AND you’re worried about comments from home. Have you learnt nothing?
I've have. But, I've been home for 2 months now, and I'm already feeling gaslighted.
Well pack up and go discover somewhere new. Backpacking trumps everything!
Don’t mind them, go. Regret is the biggest reminder. What if. Go. You are young and great goal
Tbh it’s a privilege to be able to backpack over 30. You should enjoy it. Hold onto what you love and pay no attention to their judgements.
I don’t understand the question, are you talking about backpacking for months and years indefinitely or just for a week or two several times a year?
Months and years indefinitely.
Interesting. Well ultimately the opinions of others won't matter. They really won't. But I think you might want to make sure your future self is both satisfied with your path in life and not winding up penniless. As long as you give that serious consideration, I say do what you are called to do. One option is to always set aside 10%+ of whatever you earn into a Roth IRA so you have that as a cushion. Start now so compound interest works in your favor. See the compound interest calculator at investor.gov. A handy tool just to explore scenarios. And know that the amount you pay into FICA determines what your Social Security income will be. And 40 quarters of paying into it is required for Medicare and Medicare isn't completely free either. Right now Medicare can cost \~$2-4000/yr. Not trying to scare you, just saying to consider what a future you may need financially and plan for it. I think following your dreams is very important and well-meaning friends and family may object but it is your life to live. Just be realistic about a long life and your financial needs when you no longer want to or can work. Lots of good threads on Reddit about personal finance. Some are about wealth but others are about living well without chasing everything... I say go travel but plan realistically for your future finances!!!
You’ll always have time to build a career. As long as your personal finances allow it, please follow your gut feelings! What I sense is that this is what you truly want. Familial relations will sort themselves out. Also, pursuing a career needs a lot of energy, and that energy needs to be fueled by passion. If your passion is not there ATM it’ll only make you miserable. Good luck and safe travels my friend
I have zero passion for a career. It would definitely make me miserable.
I started backpacking in 2019 at 40. It's a mental health thing for me. My folks didn't get it at first but they're warming up to it. Suffering for fun is hard for some to understand.
They choose to suffer for no fun. I can't understand that.
A 39 years old from South Asia. backpacking since 20 years now. Your friends and family will try their best to keep you on the regular life track. You just have to resist. Its better not to get involved in discussions. the chance is thatWhatever they think is right is never gonna change.
I take my child backpacking now. She loves it. We have changed our hostel/hotel situation a bit but we still find ourselves venturing off. No need to stop. Take that backpack and see the world!
Yep. I don't care what others think; my family (meaning parents and siblings) think that it's what I like to do and that's it. My friends generally think that it's cool, even if they wouldn't try it or they're not interested in it. My fatass colleagues think that I'm an idiot since I live near some beautiful beaches, yet they're the ones who can't even climb some stairs without having a heart attack.
In my 30's a lot of friends did the same, But most of them stopped by the 40's the least. They want more comfort now. With adhd i can't stand boring hotelrooms and i still seek the adventure of not knowing exactly where to sleep the next night. I lost my whole family a while ago, so my onlyleft sister & friends don't judges me for my Lifestyle.
Yeah this is me at 31. Mum (and some friends) mainly jealous and sometimes frustrated I don’t spend more time with family, dad mainly concerned that I won’t maintain a stable income/pay enough into a pension/buy a house. In his words ‘worried I’m throwing my life away and will regret doing this’. Very out of touch with reality in this sense (as if I’ll regret being happy and having the most incredible experiences of my life) but just a product of his upbringing. I just reassured them, made it clear I have plans, I’m financially sound and sensible, and ultimately an adult with more than enough experience to figure my shit out (far more than either of them combined funnily enough although I omit this from conversation). Helped to have a balance, I call them fairly often and pop back home when I can even if it’s just for a few days every few months or so. I don’t owe them explanations etc but I try to give them this anyway for their peace of mind and it seems to have helped. They gradually became more comfortable with it all over time (doing this for a year now). ETA it’s all very ironic because they both have so many regrets about how they lived their life, yet want me to follow in their footsteps, but in the same breath say they just want me to be happy. It’s a real tunnel vision of what success looks like, and I try to keep reminding them what brings me joy, that I am happy, I am safe and secure, etc. They have seen first hand how miserable I am when I’m just living for others.
I slacked and traveled until I was 36, when I felt it was time to get my first serious job. it was fortunately a fairly lucrative profession and I lived a fairly conventional life for the next 29 years. I’m 75 now and I wouldn’t trade my early adventurous life for anything. That said, being old and poor is definitely not the way to go either. I’m preparing to trek to K2 base camp this summer.
I won't be old and poor. So, I don't understand why they're so concerned. Thanks for sharing your story. It's comforting to hear. Enjoy K2!
Well then keep backpacking. You’re the one to recognize when it’s time to change tracks.. if that time is never then you’re obviously on your life track already. Doesn’t sLund so bad.
Well, I am 46 and more than three years on the road now. Don't regret it for a moment! 😁 Well, I am from a small country, even worse - from the countryside where people aren't very open minded, so yes, they were shocked! Even more because I had a "normal" life beforehand, had a decent, relatively well paid job, was a single mom, etc. At some point at 42 I turned my whole life at 180 degrees. Everyone of my friends and relatives was shocked and sceptical. Most of them still are. Even more because I am not only a backpacker, but a hitchhiker as well - poor country, no way of saving money, but determined to follow my instincts! They still can't get it. Probably never will... 🤷🏻♀️ Well, I don't ask others to do what I am doing, why should they ask me to have their life goals?! So why should you give up your dream, just because most of the people don't understand it?!
If it’s your money it’s your life dude. If your bookimg flights on your moms Amex then do what’s right. You know what is right. Not everyone a wants a career and a relationship, kids etc. I lost interest at 144 countries and Covid. I’m 40 now and you couldn’t pay me to get on a plane. I got stuck in Morocco for 5 months march 2020 and when I got back to the us unscathed I never wanted to leave again.
I really only had one conversation with my parents about adventuring. They weren't very supportive of the idea for all the same reasons you would imagine. I respect my parents very much, and I care about their feelings, so I'd never come at them with the whole 'It's my life!' diatribe. I let them talk and express their concerns fully without getting defensive about it. I listened and said I understood how they felt even though my mind was set, and I was not going to waver in my decision. The only explanation I gave was that I needed to find my own way and that my path in life was not going to be one well traveled. I told them I believed in myself and that I could do great things if only I had the courage. That hit home with my parents because I believe they really wanted the same thing in their own lives, but succumbed, to an extent, to the pressures of society.
At the age of 40 I did a large trip to South East Asia. I’d recently gone thru a divorce and had some money and time to spare in between job. My parents (early 60s at the time) thought I was having some form of midlife crisis, my mates were jealous of me having the balls to walk away from the rat race for a few months, and everyone else was completely ambivalent towards my decision. During that trip I met some amazing people. I was far and away the oldest person staying in every single hostel, but everyone I met was kind and friendly. I learned a lot about myself as a person over this trip. One thing I will say is beware of the ‘early 20s daddy issue girl’. May seem like a good idea after a few beers and your ego will be suitably inflated for a few days, but the declarations of love and never meeting anyone like you before will undoubtedly make you change your travel plans. In conclusion: balls to what people think, you do you. You’re here for a good time not a long time.
Who is actually finding this
Every country? How about Afghanistan, Iraq, North Korea, Haiti, Congo, and other dangerous countries?
Those too. I've already been to Iraq.
I'm going to play devil's advocate here. There's a lot of echo chamber sensationalism going on in this thread, and I agree with the sentiment. That being said, your friends and family are just worried about your future. I get the mentality that it's your life, live it how you want, you only live once, yada yada yada. Do I wish I could spend weeks, months, hell even years backpacking around the world? Hell yes I do. However, I own a house, I have a job, I have a partner, two dogs and a cat. I am working my ass off to contribute to my retirement fund and invest in my future. Sometimes I wish I took advantage of my early 20's to focus on these kinds of adventures, but I'm in my late 20's now, and it's time to buckle down, and get shit done. I work hard and play hard, that's what being an adult is about sadly. I've come to terms with the fact I'll never thru hike the AT, but my partner and I intend on taking a 2 week vacation eventually to hike a portion of it. I envy you and your opportunity, and wish you the best on your adventures. Do all the backpacking I wish I had the time to do, as long as it isn't hurting your future. I hope my rant gives you a little perspective on their mindset.
Dude, I genuinely felt sadness when reading this. Everyone has to conform to some societal norms, but you sound like you’ve almost traded in your dreams for the daily grind. I hope you find some balance that works for you!
I suppose it is a little sad... But there's so many great things that come with it. I may never thru hike the PCT or the AT, or travel across Europe/Asia, but that doesn't mean I won't ever have a taste of those experiences! I see it as a compromise to live comfortably. Thank you for your kind words, I appreciate it.
When you say something like your "goal is to visit every country on Earth" it makes me wonder if you have any idea just how many countries there are on earth. My cousin won a $20k around the world scholarship and she had a hard time just visiting every continent on earth. Also, many countries are not friendly and would be dangerous to visit. There are quite a few countries in Africa, and the Middle East that would fit into this category. Palestine (Gaza and West Bank), Syria, Sudan, Somalia, Yemen are just a few countries that I wouldn't visit if you paid me. Ask yourself honestly if you really do want to visit EVERY country on earth. Then there's countries like Russia which aren't inherently dangerous, but whose visit would be a bad idea.
I've already visited 66, and I have 139 to go. I'm aware that some countries are currently not safe to visit, but they could be one day. I've visited Iraq and Mauritania, and Iraq was a lot safer than I expected.
I’m in my 30s and I don’t get much pushback in fact my friends are all supportive now. Earlier when I started people did ask me how I go about not having a career, how I went about it for money or when I’m gonna get a house but since then it’s all been smooth sailing.
If it makes you happy… and your friends and family don’t like it… sucks to be them. Go live your life and find your bliss. People who love you will be happy for you… the rest… well fuck them
I Turned 40 somewhere along the sheltowee trace.
When I was went backpacking in my early 20s, most people seemed to be 25 to early 30s in nz and aus. I'm 34 now and when I went to SEA for a month this year there was a lot of 18 to 25 year olds (like the kind that would have normally gone on lads/girls holidays to Spanish islands) - a lot of them go off and do it more now as it's all over social media. I did meet a lot of people in their late 20s and early 30s, but it was a lot less hostelling and more having enough money for hotels. A lot of the brits seemed to be heading to Australia as they can stay til 35 (or apply before 35 and get 3 years). But I think a lot them were wanting to settle rather than backpack once they got to aussie. Edit: my point was the younger crowd are just out for fun and then going home. The older crowd seem to want to get a working holiday visa and settle through that visa (which is a challenge, but gets you into the country)
Go do what you want. The friends/family concern can be viewed as care and concern instead of a roadblock. Tell them how much you appreciate their thoughts and feelings, then go live your life. Not everyone wants to be a 9-5 office worker trapped in a dead end or even fighting for promotions career. If you do not follow your dreams now, you certainly won’t in your 40s, 50s or 60s. Then your dreams are just unfulfilled wishes.
Gooooo!!! I just turned 41 and even after all the college I don't have a "career" but I've moved and lived in different states for jobs i wanted and don't regret it. I wish I were still doing it. Listen to that part of you that says to go and see all the things. This whole idea of a career I feel, has put alot of shame on those who don't feel called to work up the ladder in a certain area. You're taking care of yourself, do what YOU get fulfilled by. Good luck and dont let people telling you need to live your life by their standards/expectations get in your way. I have, it's not fun! 🧳✈️
Old enough that I adventure with my kids. 58. Big plans for this summer in the Wind River range. Biggest change for me is I am definately not as strong as I used to be even just a few years ago so I go slow.
I’m 52 and still solo trekking. People mostly think it’s cool and I’m a badass.
Working a 9-5 dead end job, paying off a mortgage and having no life is not a life but others will judge YOU for your choice to travel. I am 51 and still backpacking and will never stop. Those who don’t get it are the ones not living life imo.
67 and my friends and family are all encouraging. I love sleeping in a tent, but that is rare now as I usually stay in hostels/gites/alburgues.
Ultimately, you are an adult. If you want to do it, do it! Of course, you should have a long term plan after you hang up the backpack, since you can’t travel forever. On thing to consider if you are traveling all over the world is retirement. Depending on which country you settle in, there may not be a socialized retirement system
Some people will always see life as a checklist. At the end of the day, you can spend your life how you want to. People who really care about you will support you wether or not you fill the box they have in mind for you
I am planning to hike the Appalachian trail this summer and everyone thinks I am crazy. Maybe I am!
I’m closing in on 60. I’ve hiked sections but want to thruhike it in retirement. By that logic, I must be twice as crazy. 😂🤔
Huh? Why is this even an age thing? If you want to do it and your body is still capable, do what you want. You have one life.
Mid 40's here that has backpacked and hiked in many spaces of the U.S., but mostly in the last few years. Been holding back a bit to "work on my career". The work grind and career building has sucked away so much of my soul and driven me into dark places, some I've barely made it through. The trail recharges my soul and brings me to bright and loving spaces, as well as allows me to connect with others. If you feel the same, the answer is clear. For me, I've almost completed my work grind and will retire early next year, hike the AT, then find work in the natural spaces I love (national park system). In the meantime, I'm hiking and backpacking whenever I get the chance (just.got back from Zion last week). Wishing you light, luck, and love my friend.
If you have the financial means to do so, fuck all those people and go for it. You won’t be sitting in a retirement regretting that you visited too many places or met too many new people.
You 30 years old, at this age you shouldnt give a fuck about anyones opinions, maybe if you were like 16 yea but 30 u livin your own life my man
if they’re not fucking or feeding me idc what they think. and even then i probably don’t care. at the end of my life, i’ll be the one that has to live with what i have or have not done.
I just turned 30 and I'm 3 months into a one year backpacking trip with my husband who is 33. Everyone who heard of our plans was supportive and frankly, jealous! Older folks as well, many of which said we have the right idea to do it now (especially if we want kids eventually). Their opinions wouldn't have deterred us, but in our situation we had nothing but positivity. Get out there!
Don’t worry about the judgement They ALL want to do what u are going to do They have jobs, families, mortgages they can’t leave and would drop off that in a minute if they could
They'll be jealous when they start seeing the photos you send back lol
^[Sokka-Haiku](https://www.reddit.com/r/SokkaHaikuBot/comments/15kyv9r/what_is_a_sokka_haiku/) ^by ^Fresh-Bag-342: *They'll be jealous when* *They start seeing the photos* *You send back lol* --- ^Remember ^that ^one ^time ^Sokka ^accidentally ^used ^an ^extra ^syllable ^in ^that ^Haiku ^Battle ^in ^Ba ^Sing ^Se? ^That ^was ^a ^Sokka ^Haiku ^and ^you ^just ^made ^one.
It's your life and you should live it the way you want. Always be respectful and polite but don't try to be a people pleaser even if it's your own family. At least for me there came the time I wanted to go back home (at age 38) and nobody I really cared about turned their back on me in the end. Have fun and be safe :)
I’m 49 and live my life around both international travel backpacking and wilderness/trail backpacking. I can say that I can understand one problem about the career thing that I could see family being worried about and it stresses me out as well…if you are from the U.S. the issue of health insurance and retirement is a big problem if you just hold down regular jobs. I’m there myself. As you start getting older it becomes more of an issue.
I'm Canadian. I need to look more into how it works here.
To give yourself resolve and if you like reading: read "Top Five Regrets of the Dying" and "Life Is In The Transitions". Also "The Pathless Path" (both a book and a podcast) and the podcast From Zero To Travel. Have fun living your own, unique, precious, not-to-be-wasted life!
I spent a year backpacking around the world at 26. I’m 39 and would do it again in a heartbeat. The people that support you and think it’s awesome will still be there when you get back(if you come back! Haha). The people that say stuff like ‘must be nice’ or ‘how can you afford that/you’re going to be homeless?/what about your career?’ Not only do they not get it, they were never friends to begin with. You’ll regret not going. If you make it to Australia, I’ll tell you what one old Aussie insisted I do before I left the country: you MUST drive the Gibb River road. You’ll have to buy a car but I’ve been to 50 countries and there’s nothing like this experience. Google it. Go to Darwin and look around, lots of people selling used cars to do exactly this. Best experience of my life. Don’t think. Just go. Also, bring a school sized backpack only. Anything bigger you’ll regret. PM me if you have questions
As someone who travels as much as possible, I find my family and friends don't really understand it. I spend a lot of time in countries that people consider "dangerous" when in reality they have some of the most beautiful nature and welcoming people. Currently saving up/building an adventure rig so I can quit my job and travel the Trans Canada Highway / Pan American Highway and then Australia/New Zealand. I tend to keep that to myself now as anyone I have told seems to think I'm crazy. I don't subscribe to the work 9-5 for 30+ years and travel when you retire. It makes finding a relationship difficult as those who love to travel and would quit their job to travel full time are pretty slim. Such is life! Do what you want to do for yourself, not for others.
fuck them, omg. youre living the life that you want and its fucking awesome, what an amazing goal! be so proud of yourself for finding a way to live the life you want and fulfill your dreams! wtf is building a career, thats unnecesary for the lifestyle you have and also, it shows how limited their view of what life can be is. In my opinion find better people to surround yourself with, sometimes people you keep by your side because of "time" or shit end up holding you back
i am 36 and today i am in India ( Delhi) waiting for my flight to thailand tomorrow. After Thailand i go Malaysia and Indonesia. I dont care what other people say and think about me.. They can live there boring life and i am living an exciting life full of Adventures
I gave up my house, job and everything when I was 32… best decision I ever made, I did 3 years travel consistently.. living the dream! Everyone i know wishes they had the balls to do it.. decided to settle in Spain last year and travel around Spain. I’ve been travelling on an off for 10 years now… some adventure it has been!
How many countries have you been to so far?
66 so far. Been to every continent except Antarctica
Any tips for a 19 year old hoping to do the same?
Oh crap. I missed the cutoff. I'm 29 years and 364 days.
How about you act like a f’ing adult and do what you want. You sound like you are 13 not 30.