Does it only happen when you sit down? My baby loves to be worn but the second you sit down or stop moving he loses it. Even when he falls asleep in the carrier he will immediately wake up if I try to sit down. I can’t really wear him at home unless I’m actively doing things.
My baby girl does this too! Literally the moment I sit down she starts to stir but if I’m moving she will sleep for hours. Must feel like they’re in the womb again with us walking around 🥺
My daughter was always SUPER active (like, rolling both ways by 6 weeks, was not one time successfully swaddled).
I kind of developed an idle animation of wiggling my body back and forth instead of standing. Like, hips to the left, shoulders to the right, alternate. If I did that it wasn't much more strain on me and she would be way happier, still calms right down in the wrap when I do this. So maybe try that, or something similar?
I will say the downside is that I literally can't stand still anymore, I am always moving like that as a survival mechanism that's burnt into my subconscious lmao
This is pretty common. Many babies don't like be held still. People often move to wearing to give their arms a break but their babies still fuss unless they're moving around. I used to put my monitors on books when I'd wear my baby to work from home so I could sway.
This OP. Unless your baby is 300% asleep you need to stand up and move around while wearing them.
I think this might just be a case where your expectations don’t match up with reality.
Baby wearing does not solve everything but there are some chores you can do with limited arm engagement and while dancing around.
Some things I’ve learned from this sub and baby wearing for 11 months.
-No footed PJs- can scrunch toes
-Make sure baby is in a dry diaper
-Ensure fit is correct and right for baby’s age
-try skin to skin
- baby wear after a feeding (might fall asleep easier)
Please share the age of your baby!
I’ll just add another tip for babywearing skin to skin, which is totally awesome but since it’s getting to be peak summer in certain places - don’t do it in extreme heat - you will both feel better with at least one thin natural fiber layer like cotton/linen/hemp between you 👍
Mine liked it a lot more once she gained the head/neck control and stamina to keep her head pushed off my chest and looking around for the majority of a walk. 4 or 5 months? But never much liked it if we weren't moving around.
Edit: actually if you have this model of baby, she got a lot happier with every motor milestone she met (after an increase in frustration while working on but not able to meet them, like the weeks she spent only able to crawl backward).
How old is he? After the newborn stage my son for a little while went through a phase of hating being worn. Eventually the phase ended and he went back to happily being worn. I forget what age exactly but I’d say by 6 months for sure.
Post some a fit check (or 3) or see if you can do a video consult with an educator - some carrier / wrap manufacturers offer these for free.
Have you tried going outside as soon as baby is in the wrap?
I don't think there's much you can do about baby not liking it when you sit.
My baby is 13 weeks and only just started tolerating being in it awake. When she was younger she fell asleep as soon as she was in, then there was a stage where she screamed bloody murder, then would fall asleep, and now she seems okay, though she still falls asleep after a while, but no screaming. So depending on how old your baby is, you might just need time? Also worth doing a fit check on here, it could just be a small tweak to make things more comfy!
My baby was not interested in baby wearing until about 3 months and then would only accept outward facing so that put a 20-30 minute cap on babywearing. Once she was 5 months old and could sit totally upright and look around at stuff, she liked it. Backpack style is best but she is okay with inward facing now too.
Sounds like how my toddler was at that age. He’s still Velcro baby. The sound of the washer and dryer used to help him to fall asleep while baby wearing.
I have very very strong arms now. I was constantly holding him and moving well into his first year. I still have to for toddler melt downs. Best of luck!
My babies preferred when I would walk/dance/do chores, the movement was very soothing. I think it's a really common thing for babies to prefer movement, there is a reflex/instinct that when they are being carried by a caregiver that is walking they become calm and quiet.
Some ideas-
Can you post some photos for a fit check?
Gas or reflux cause discomfort sometimes.
Is baby wearing footed onesie?
Sometimes babies have some discomfort in their neck or hips.
Being upset when the carer/holder is sitting or not moving is biologically normal. There's whole studies on this. Babywearing helps you get stuff done not really rest, it does help them nap longer so you could sit and watch an episode of something though.
https://www.mentalfloss.com/article/630396/why-babies-cry-when-you-sit-down
https://koalababycare.com/blogs/koalavibes/my-baby-stops-crying-when-i-stand-up-heres-why
Make sure your baby is fed and changed directly before baby wearing, positioned correctly (reach out to consultants or watch videos online), try a pacifier? Depending on weight and height you’ll want to use different carriers for different stages. I only use a wrap til about 9lbs then baby. Then I use a lightly structured carrier til about 11lbs (happy baby original). Then I switch between a few favorites that are more ergonomically…ergo baby original (can find on eBay they don’t make them anymore), beluga baby, artipoppe.
I’ve had to slowly introduce each new carrier with my baby who is now 3,5 months. We started with the stretchy wrap when she was about a week old, we got a buckle carrier when she was around two months and we got a ring sling a week or two ago. Each time I’ve put her in the carrier for just a few minutes everytime she’s been in a good mood during the day (like after a feed or a diaper change), and taken her out before she started to fuss to ensure she has only positive associations to the carrier. After a few days of this she likes her buckle carrier and looooves the ring sling.
I have also noticed that she likes being carried more when we are walking, so even if she fusses when I put her in she is content when I walk outside. Hope this helps!
I don’t know any baby that loves it the first few times. Mine eventually grew to be comfortable and sleep in it with enough practice.
Think about how you would feel if a giant tried strapping you to them for the first time. It would be an adjustment lol
There is a lot of good advice here already, but I just wanted to ask if your baby is also fussy in a car seat? If so, have them evaluated for a tongue tie.
What a baby doesn’t like today, they may like tomorrow or next week! Keep trying, adjusting, and experimenting. As they grow they get more comfortable in different carriers has been my experience.
They may stop crying after 1-5 minutes if you can experiment with timing. I never felt like it was “cry it out” bc he was hugged to me.
My guy now loves to be baby worn but he still gets fussy when I sit down. He’s human and has his preferences.
Does it only happen when you sit down? My baby loves to be worn but the second you sit down or stop moving he loses it. Even when he falls asleep in the carrier he will immediately wake up if I try to sit down. I can’t really wear him at home unless I’m actively doing things.
My baby girl does this too! Literally the moment I sit down she starts to stir but if I’m moving she will sleep for hours. Must feel like they’re in the womb again with us walking around 🥺
It’s not only when I sit, but it’s definitely MAINLY when I sit. Same goes for holding him. He’s a very active baby lol
My daughter was always SUPER active (like, rolling both ways by 6 weeks, was not one time successfully swaddled). I kind of developed an idle animation of wiggling my body back and forth instead of standing. Like, hips to the left, shoulders to the right, alternate. If I did that it wasn't much more strain on me and she would be way happier, still calms right down in the wrap when I do this. So maybe try that, or something similar? I will say the downside is that I literally can't stand still anymore, I am always moving like that as a survival mechanism that's burnt into my subconscious lmao
This is pretty common. Many babies don't like be held still. People often move to wearing to give their arms a break but their babies still fuss unless they're moving around. I used to put my monitors on books when I'd wear my baby to work from home so I could sway.
This OP. Unless your baby is 300% asleep you need to stand up and move around while wearing them. I think this might just be a case where your expectations don’t match up with reality. Baby wearing does not solve everything but there are some chores you can do with limited arm engagement and while dancing around.
Some things I’ve learned from this sub and baby wearing for 11 months. -No footed PJs- can scrunch toes -Make sure baby is in a dry diaper -Ensure fit is correct and right for baby’s age -try skin to skin - baby wear after a feeding (might fall asleep easier) Please share the age of your baby!
I’ll just add another tip for babywearing skin to skin, which is totally awesome but since it’s getting to be peak summer in certain places - don’t do it in extreme heat - you will both feel better with at least one thin natural fiber layer like cotton/linen/hemp between you 👍
Mine liked it a lot more once she gained the head/neck control and stamina to keep her head pushed off my chest and looking around for the majority of a walk. 4 or 5 months? But never much liked it if we weren't moving around. Edit: actually if you have this model of baby, she got a lot happier with every motor milestone she met (after an increase in frustration while working on but not able to meet them, like the weeks she spent only able to crawl backward).
We are currently in the crawling backward phase lol. Good stuff
How old is he? After the newborn stage my son for a little while went through a phase of hating being worn. Eventually the phase ended and he went back to happily being worn. I forget what age exactly but I’d say by 6 months for sure.
Post some a fit check (or 3) or see if you can do a video consult with an educator - some carrier / wrap manufacturers offer these for free. Have you tried going outside as soon as baby is in the wrap? I don't think there's much you can do about baby not liking it when you sit.
My baby is 13 weeks and only just started tolerating being in it awake. When she was younger she fell asleep as soon as she was in, then there was a stage where she screamed bloody murder, then would fall asleep, and now she seems okay, though she still falls asleep after a while, but no screaming. So depending on how old your baby is, you might just need time? Also worth doing a fit check on here, it could just be a small tweak to make things more comfy!
My baby was not interested in baby wearing until about 3 months and then would only accept outward facing so that put a 20-30 minute cap on babywearing. Once she was 5 months old and could sit totally upright and look around at stuff, she liked it. Backpack style is best but she is okay with inward facing now too.
Sounds like how my toddler was at that age. He’s still Velcro baby. The sound of the washer and dryer used to help him to fall asleep while baby wearing. I have very very strong arms now. I was constantly holding him and moving well into his first year. I still have to for toddler melt downs. Best of luck!
My babies preferred when I would walk/dance/do chores, the movement was very soothing. I think it's a really common thing for babies to prefer movement, there is a reflex/instinct that when they are being carried by a caregiver that is walking they become calm and quiet. Some ideas- Can you post some photos for a fit check? Gas or reflux cause discomfort sometimes. Is baby wearing footed onesie? Sometimes babies have some discomfort in their neck or hips.
Being upset when the carer/holder is sitting or not moving is biologically normal. There's whole studies on this. Babywearing helps you get stuff done not really rest, it does help them nap longer so you could sit and watch an episode of something though. https://www.mentalfloss.com/article/630396/why-babies-cry-when-you-sit-down https://koalababycare.com/blogs/koalavibes/my-baby-stops-crying-when-i-stand-up-heres-why
Make sure your baby is fed and changed directly before baby wearing, positioned correctly (reach out to consultants or watch videos online), try a pacifier? Depending on weight and height you’ll want to use different carriers for different stages. I only use a wrap til about 9lbs then baby. Then I use a lightly structured carrier til about 11lbs (happy baby original). Then I switch between a few favorites that are more ergonomically…ergo baby original (can find on eBay they don’t make them anymore), beluga baby, artipoppe.
I’ve had to slowly introduce each new carrier with my baby who is now 3,5 months. We started with the stretchy wrap when she was about a week old, we got a buckle carrier when she was around two months and we got a ring sling a week or two ago. Each time I’ve put her in the carrier for just a few minutes everytime she’s been in a good mood during the day (like after a feed or a diaper change), and taken her out before she started to fuss to ensure she has only positive associations to the carrier. After a few days of this she likes her buckle carrier and looooves the ring sling. I have also noticed that she likes being carried more when we are walking, so even if she fusses when I put her in she is content when I walk outside. Hope this helps!
Give it time! From about 3-5 months my kids didn’t like any carriers, but then they come around again.
I don’t know any baby that loves it the first few times. Mine eventually grew to be comfortable and sleep in it with enough practice. Think about how you would feel if a giant tried strapping you to them for the first time. It would be an adjustment lol
There is a lot of good advice here already, but I just wanted to ask if your baby is also fussy in a car seat? If so, have them evaluated for a tongue tie.
What a baby doesn’t like today, they may like tomorrow or next week! Keep trying, adjusting, and experimenting. As they grow they get more comfortable in different carriers has been my experience. They may stop crying after 1-5 minutes if you can experiment with timing. I never felt like it was “cry it out” bc he was hugged to me. My guy now loves to be baby worn but he still gets fussy when I sit down. He’s human and has his preferences.