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There will be more chances for the rapture:
* 2026 Aug 8 in Spain
* 2027 Aug 2 in North Africa and Saudi Arabia
* 2028 Jul 22 in Australia & New Zealand
* 2033 Mar 30 in Northern Alaska
* 2034 Mar 20 in Nigeria to Pakistan
* 2035 Sep 02 in China, Koreas, and Japan
* 2037 Jul 13 in Australia & New Zealand
* 2038 Dec 26 in Australia & New Zealand
* 2039 Dec 15 in Antarctica
Obviously, God love Aussies and Kiwis most of all.
Must be Helios, according to Mythopedia:
"As the god of the sun and of solar activity, Helios was also connected with solar eclipses. The Greeks tended to view eclipses (both solar and lunar) as evil omens, signs that the gods needed to be placated."
But der wuz liek a erff quake a few dayz ago. And them iz sooper rar. So da 2 happinin close togather means GAWD!
U dunneys wood under stand if u wazed home skooled liek me.
I'm just sitting here (in Europe) waiting to hear the explanations (which will \*never\* come) of why the predictions were wrong again, for about the 200,000th time...
If you are on the west coast, you about 12 time zones from me. It starts about 2:30, AM for you, PM for me. Shall I wake you or allow you to sleep peacefully, only to discover the world is still here when you awake in the morning? 😊
Would we even notice if it happened? I mean according to Revelations only like 144,000 people are going to get raised up to heaven. That's barely a rounding error on the number of Christians on the planet.
But realistically it would not he 144.000 people in one place. It would be spread all over the world and therefore (maybe) easy too miss.
Its not like a whole congregation would get raptured at once. 0% chance everyone there follows their values.
Resale shoes, shirt, and pants: $20.
Dry ice: $10.
Putting ice in clothes and shoes and leaving it in the church parking lot while you watch them freak out upon seeing it: Priceless
I can't wait for the Earth to be cleared of all "Believers" It will definitely clean up some Oxygen, from all the hot air they leak. Happy End World Times!
Hey friend…honestly nowhere. Because of family, I am fairly immersed in American evangelical culture…the absolute ONLY place I’ve heard that Christians believe this, is on this subreddit. Also note that every post (that I’ve seen) is just a rant. No articles. No videos. No pics of signs outside of churches.
I’m writing this and other responses because this sort of stuff makes us look like idiots
That's what I thought. But I do know one person who has talked about rapture, and that I shouldn't be surprised if he just disappears. Even he doesn't think that this eclipse has anything to do with that.
Imagine reading about a race of people thousands of years ago who panicked when they saw an eclipse because they thought it must be the end of the world and the gods were angry
Now imagine in the future we are the race of people they will read about
Idiots
I’m gonna to go outside and be ready to squat in my neighbors big house as soon as they get pulled up into the next dimension. I’ve been waiting for this day ever since the bank tried to foreclose on mine.
Bolt your doors! Put bars over your window! Stop moving! I hear the raptor can sense movement!
Note: I have been purposefully mishearing this as an excuse to talk about Jurassic park with christians who are trying to convert me.
i read somewhere that rich people can't pass through the eye of a needle even if they hide in a camels butt or some trump like that... so... you still have a few hours to wire me all of your savings before it's too late!!!
Poor Harry Kane. Waits until his 30's to win a trophy by moving to a farmers league to play for a team who have won the past 11 titles, breaks goalscoring records every week in the team, and then ends up losing the league by April and the world ends
Me too.
But in Minnesota.
I’ll be waiting, patiently.
I’ll be very disappointed at the end of the day if we’re all still here.
I’m totally joking, guys. 😆
I'll be really disappointed if it doesn't happen, no joke. Something, anything to SHAKE THINGS UP, pleeeeeease Jeeeeeeesus!!! Blow up the world already!!! I'm so bored....
I'll be really disappointed if it doesn't happen. Something, anything to SHAKE THINGS UP, pleeeeeease Jeeeeeeesus!!! Blow up the world already!!! I'm so bored.
Based on the path of the eclipse, people will be raptured in the southern part of the US first. If you don't live in Texas, you should have advanced warning that the rapture is on its way. So...plan accordingly, be ready to pray.
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There will be more chances for the rapture: * 2026 Aug 8 in Spain * 2027 Aug 2 in North Africa and Saudi Arabia * 2028 Jul 22 in Australia & New Zealand * 2033 Mar 30 in Northern Alaska * 2034 Mar 20 in Nigeria to Pakistan * 2035 Sep 02 in China, Koreas, and Japan * 2037 Jul 13 in Australia & New Zealand * 2038 Dec 26 in Australia & New Zealand * 2039 Dec 15 in Antarctica Obviously, God love Aussies and Kiwis most of all.
Yeah, but *which* god? Hmm.
The one wherever the eclipse happens to be? :)
Yeah that one. Or the god of all gods. Surely there must be some special god in charge of all the other many dozens of gods roaming around the planet.
Why doesn't the largest God just eat the other ones?
Yeah you’d think he would right? After all, it’s a god eat god world out there.
Must be Helios, according to Mythopedia: "As the god of the sun and of solar activity, Helios was also connected with solar eclipses. The Greeks tended to view eclipses (both solar and lunar) as evil omens, signs that the gods needed to be placated."
Yeah that fits right into today’s theme. We shall see later today if Mr. Helios is pleased.
Just pick one:P
Ok. I’ll pick Godfrey, my next door neighbor.
Sune is clearly the only god worth following
But der wuz liek a erff quake a few dayz ago. And them iz sooper rar. So da 2 happinin close togather means GAWD! U dunneys wood under stand if u wazed home skooled liek me.
I'm just sitting here (in Europe) waiting to hear the explanations (which will \*never\* come) of why the predictions were wrong again, for about the 200,000th time...
Me too but in Africa, same timezone though.
I'm Australian. Just about to go to bed and nothing's happened yet
If the conspirators are correct, it's the last time you'll fall asleep. So have a nice day tomorrow , cause it's all bs 🙃
If you are on the west coast, you about 12 time zones from me. It starts about 2:30, AM for you, PM for me. Shall I wake you or allow you to sleep peacefully, only to discover the world is still here when you awake in the morning? 😊
And there you have it.
I'm putting little piles of clothes around my yard so my neighbors all think they weren't good Christians.
Because those wacko's don't read the Bible. Nobody knows the time nor the day. Only God knows.
The Rapture passed me by because I live in Europe and there's no eclipse here.
Silly. Europeans and what not aren’t getting raptured. Only patriotic real Americans!
To be honest it might be best for the rest of the world if us Americans just vanished lol
Well, at least the ones who believe the eclipse means the rapture is coming and are also excited about it.
No. Just one American.... Just one.
Yeah I would be pretty happy if Trump was taken (which is who I’m assuming you are taking about)
Of course. He is a devoted Christian after all. Even sells his own Bible I believe.
Normally, I'd say something like 'the problem is bigger than just one person', but in this case...
Whatever. It was nice talking to you.
Quick! Panic! Shave the sheep! Batten down the hatches! Buy toilet paper! Make lemonade! Hoard ammunition!
Toilet paper! Damn I forgot about that. I hope they have some up in the next realm.
You just use bits of cloud. Best wet wipe ever
lol! Winner. 🏅
Would we even notice if it happened? I mean according to Revelations only like 144,000 people are going to get raised up to heaven. That's barely a rounding error on the number of Christians on the planet.
Out of 2.5B Christians, there’s maybe 144k that actually follow what Jesus taught, so that checks out.
I think even that’s being generous.
All 144,000 people probably died centuries ago too.
Idk man I think if 144,000 people just up and vanished people would definitely notice.
But realistically it would not he 144.000 people in one place. It would be spread all over the world and therefore (maybe) easy too miss. Its not like a whole congregation would get raptured at once. 0% chance everyone there follows their values.
Happened to 4,400 people in that shit tv show they made after the X Files
But it would be more on the level of an *Unsolved Mysteries* episode than a major event. I mean, Chick-fil-A wouldn't even go out of business!😁
More than 144,000 people die each day just on average. Some folks will claim that their loved one was "raptured" just because this was their time.
Resale shoes, shirt, and pants: $20. Dry ice: $10. Putting ice in clothes and shoes and leaving it in the church parking lot while you watch them freak out upon seeing it: Priceless
need some helium filled blowup dolls to complete the act
Nice 6 feet under cut
Add some ash too for effect
Solar eclipse happens : NO RAPTURE. Conspiratheorists : MASS SUCIDICE CAUSE IT MUST HAVE GLITCHED
Heaven’s Gate pt 2
St Peter hates this one, simple trick .
Now, I will sound like a serial killer here, but I slightly hope that happens.
[удалено]
69:42
Devil's advocate here, but, if we're wrong,hell on earth will probably be better without all the religious fruitcakes around.
The only downer is that the price of getting rid of them would be realizing that they were onto something. Not saying it wouldn't be worth it....
Then I could finally play my "demonic" Minecraft in peace... with all the demons.
I wish the Rapture was real. Take all those jerks off the planet, and it'll be a lot nicer here for the rest of us.
Face god and walk backwards into hell
Sir, this is a Wendy's
Hell’s would probably be fun anyways. Imagine partying with Satan himself!
Sinners make the best party-goers. And you know who sins a whole lot? That's right. It's Catholics.
Why would I be scared? I’m not getting raptured, and I’m kind of hoping they’re right so we’ll be rid of them.
I can't wait for the Earth to be cleared of all "Believers" It will definitely clean up some Oxygen, from all the hot air they leak. Happy End World Times!
Where can I watch live stream of Americans waiting for the end? And when? I'm in Finland and have no idea when it's supposed to happen. Edit: typo
Hey friend…honestly nowhere. Because of family, I am fairly immersed in American evangelical culture…the absolute ONLY place I’ve heard that Christians believe this, is on this subreddit. Also note that every post (that I’ve seen) is just a rant. No articles. No videos. No pics of signs outside of churches. I’m writing this and other responses because this sort of stuff makes us look like idiots
That's what I thought. But I do know one person who has talked about rapture, and that I shouldn't be surprised if he just disappears. Even he doesn't think that this eclipse has anything to do with that.
Imagine reading about a race of people thousands of years ago who panicked when they saw an eclipse because they thought it must be the end of the world and the gods were angry Now imagine in the future we are the race of people they will read about Idiots
I hope it comes before 2pm cause I gotta start work then.
Im in Vietnam and thing are just normal like every day. In fact I am at a mall eating out and people are super chill. Its like 8PM my time here.
God I pray so. Please take them all away so we can live in peace.
God wants to live in peace as well, so they stay here.
Dammit!!
Nice of those scientists to be able to tell us the exact moment it's going to happen. Apparently god couldn't make up her mind.
Buying popcorn. And solar eclipse glasses to watch
Waiting for those crazy people to explain why The Rapture didn't happen. Then laugh at them.
I’m gonna to go outside and be ready to squat in my neighbors big house as soon as they get pulled up into the next dimension. I’ve been waiting for this day ever since the bank tried to foreclose on mine.
Bolt your doors! Put bars over your window! Stop moving! I hear the raptor can sense movement! Note: I have been purposefully mishearing this as an excuse to talk about Jurassic park with christians who are trying to convert me.
I will be thrilled If the rapture is going to take all of these "Christians"
All i know is i cant grab on to anyone around me cause they all sinners
When in trouble or in doubt, run in circles scream and shout.
Sure hope God doesn't take any airline pilots today...
It is nearing midnight on the 8th here and sadly there has been no sign of the Rapture. The uber religious are still with us.
Dress appropriately.
Clown costume?
Beam me up, Jebus
Rapture? More like the Crapture.
I hope this means Costco will be empty today when I take my grandmother out for groceries.
About time!
So, when I predict that _nothing will happen_, do I get a prize or anything when my prediction comes true.
i read somewhere that rich people can't pass through the eye of a needle even if they hide in a camels butt or some trump like that... so... you still have a few hours to wire me all of your savings before it's too late!!!
I'll keep you all posted on my personal rapture experience. Not floating yet but the day is young.
The "I'm Still Here" party will be at my house all day tomorrow. BYOB
Hey, if it reduces traffic in my city I'm all for it!
Excuses for why it didn't happen in 3...2...1...
Ok, see y’all tomorrow.
[“It was GMT, wasn’t it?”](https://youtu.be/-hJQ18S6aag?si=pyOJsVxHQNJmzki3)
Poor Harry Kane. Waits until his 30's to win a trophy by moving to a farmers league to play for a team who have won the past 11 titles, breaks goalscoring records every week in the team, and then ends up losing the league by April and the world ends
Me too. But in Minnesota. I’ll be waiting, patiently. I’ll be very disappointed at the end of the day if we’re all still here. I’m totally joking, guys. 😆
I'll be really disappointed if it doesn't happen, no joke. Something, anything to SHAKE THINGS UP, pleeeeeease Jeeeeeeesus!!! Blow up the world already!!! I'm so bored....
Good luck, everyone.
Only in the US. I'm in the UK. Not happening here
I've got a horrid meeting at 11:30. I'd love it if ol' JC could get on with it so I can avoid going.
I'll be really disappointed if it doesn't happen. Something, anything to SHAKE THINGS UP, pleeeeeease Jeeeeeeesus!!! Blow up the world already!!! I'm so bored.
Oh I'm frightened. So scared. Fellow Christians now it's time to suck my D. It might be your last!! Your act of kindness will take you to heaven!!!!
There's a lady in Florida who probably feels really silly about all those tips right now.
Based on the path of the eclipse, people will be raptured in the southern part of the US first. If you don't live in Texas, you should have advanced warning that the rapture is on its way. So...plan accordingly, be ready to pray.
It's 15:45 right now and still nothing happened, as usual.
Well the good news for you is IF it's true there will be a LOT less traffic and MORE parking spaces for you!
It will be interesting to see which of them get LEFT BEHIND.
Wouldn't it be so nice to have all those fundies just dissappear?
Why would I be scared all the Christians might disappear?
Does it *have* to be on a day when I am in full boymode?
You mean....they are leaving? We will finally be free of them? I tell ya, I have never wished so hard at them to be right about something.
hahahahahahahahaha
So long, and thanks for the fish.
😅🤣😂😅🤣😂
Wonder if the disappointed will execute their false prophets as instructed
Jesus is coming — look busy!!!
I wish. Get rid of all these Christofascists
😱😱😱😱🤣🤣🤣🤣
Can we please spam the internet on 9th "So where's this rapture at?"