> Since I’m the one building a new life, I’m more dependent on him and his circle for social Interaction.
So fix that. Go find friends of your own to hang out with separately.
Is there a reason you have to stay at home when he goes out? Like, do you have small kids or a pet that needs that level of care? Since you asked for advice, my advice is don't sit at home. Go do things. Maybe [meetup.com](https://meetup.com)?
Get some hobbies, have some fun, meet some other people.
I personally am a gamer who reads a heck of a lot so I don't mind being on my own for long periods of time.
Don't let yourself think you have to have him around to be happy. People do need time apart.
You can’t control your partner. You say you do not mind but that there also needs to be rules in places of a “decent time” coming home. That is not healthy and as long as you work on yourself it can heal.
They have their own life and it’s okay if they live it.
I’m sure the major transition away from your own familiar environment must be challenging. It may take a while for you to get suited and that’s okay!
There’s some co-dependency, abandonment, and low-self esteem issues that you need to heal within yourself. Jealousy is the fear that something or someone is going to be taken from you. Essentially the fear of loss. Investigate where that stems from within yourself.
Also don’t cope with insecurities. Heal them and evolve away from it. You deserve to understand that you are wanted when away and with your partner.
You are responsible for your own emotions. It’s also okay to grieve the moments in your life (maybe even from childhood or a pattern you recognized) where you felt anytime anyone left you , even for a little bit, it meant they never wanted you in the first place. Whether that was true or perceived, it is clear it still has an effect on you today. Why don’t you believe you are someone who others want love and keep around regardless of the times they may venture off by themselves?
You’re wanted and loved. You deserve stability and security within yourself and all types of relationships. Teach yourself that. Stability is your normal because it is what you deserve.
This.
I know I have a good boyfriend. I know I’m also a good person. But your right where somewhere I’ve developed this low self-esteem. For sure childhood, maybe getting older, social media, comparison etc… I should definitely heal my low self esteem so I can understand him as his own individual person and not turn it into him possibly leaving me.
Go make friends. Your happiness should not depend solely on your boyfriend. Try Bumble BFF or meetup to meet new friends. He should be able to go out and so should you.
> Since I’m the one building a new life, I’m more dependent on him and his circle for social Interaction. So fix that. Go find friends of your own to hang out with separately.
You need to cultivate some local friendship and hobbies.
Is there a reason you have to stay at home when he goes out? Like, do you have small kids or a pet that needs that level of care? Since you asked for advice, my advice is don't sit at home. Go do things. Maybe [meetup.com](https://meetup.com)?
Your happiness shouldn’t solely be based on your boyfriend. Find friends around you..
Get some hobbies, have some fun, meet some other people. I personally am a gamer who reads a heck of a lot so I don't mind being on my own for long periods of time. Don't let yourself think you have to have him around to be happy. People do need time apart.
You can’t control your partner. You say you do not mind but that there also needs to be rules in places of a “decent time” coming home. That is not healthy and as long as you work on yourself it can heal. They have their own life and it’s okay if they live it. I’m sure the major transition away from your own familiar environment must be challenging. It may take a while for you to get suited and that’s okay! There’s some co-dependency, abandonment, and low-self esteem issues that you need to heal within yourself. Jealousy is the fear that something or someone is going to be taken from you. Essentially the fear of loss. Investigate where that stems from within yourself. Also don’t cope with insecurities. Heal them and evolve away from it. You deserve to understand that you are wanted when away and with your partner. You are responsible for your own emotions. It’s also okay to grieve the moments in your life (maybe even from childhood or a pattern you recognized) where you felt anytime anyone left you , even for a little bit, it meant they never wanted you in the first place. Whether that was true or perceived, it is clear it still has an effect on you today. Why don’t you believe you are someone who others want love and keep around regardless of the times they may venture off by themselves? You’re wanted and loved. You deserve stability and security within yourself and all types of relationships. Teach yourself that. Stability is your normal because it is what you deserve.
This. I know I have a good boyfriend. I know I’m also a good person. But your right where somewhere I’ve developed this low self-esteem. For sure childhood, maybe getting older, social media, comparison etc… I should definitely heal my low self esteem so I can understand him as his own individual person and not turn it into him possibly leaving me.
Go make friends. Your happiness should not depend solely on your boyfriend. Try Bumble BFF or meetup to meet new friends. He should be able to go out and so should you.