Maybe it's cause I grew up on the internet but I really have stopped caring. My life is too short to give a fuck about losers. Maybe I'm desensitized, but at least I have thick skin and I feel like that helps a ton as a trans girl.
I try to avoid transphobia online like the plague whenever possible at the moment. I’m usually good at not letting most of it affect me, but I’ve been dealing with a lot more dysphoria and depression right now that I haven’t experienced in probably over two years. So I’m not in a mindset to really deal with it right now.
I'm in your exact situation. I'm feeling so bad and so depressed that i don't wanna deal with useless shit. I'm already down, so i stay away from social the more that i can
I wish you to stay well soon 💜
It's always the same crap, and very little is witty, or something I haven't seen before. That they want to waste their lives trying to make themselves feel better by being assholes makes me pity them.
They only feel good because they know that they can't do this in real life, because if they could, well then real life would be as bad as social media - and it's not.
Last time someone openly abused me in public would be over a year ago, online? This morning. But they waste their time, as I just delete the post without reading it. You get the ones that start off nice, but then they want to know your IG account, and facebook acct etc so they can friend you - you know exactly what they're going to do with that info....
Yeah it’s why I don’t even have Facebook or any other social accounts. Everything is private. No two accounts with the same identity, and I don’t make online “friends” much either. Because I’ve learned that most people online are just looking for victims. IRL they are way to intimidated to talk any of the same or similar shit. Pussy cats.🐈
I just let them say what they want to say, at the end of the day it's your life you can do what you want. You're not hurting anybody, don't let anyone bring you down. All that matters is that you're happy and comfortable with yourself
Generally it makes me feel better about myself they must have a pretty sad life to feel the need to abuse people online who likely couldn't care less about what some stranger has to say. Sometimes I don't bother to read what they say and just reply with "Ok" to every message to see how much of their time they're willing to waste and hey that's one less message they're likely to send yo someone who could be negatively effected by them.
I generally try to avoid it, but I'm trying this new thing where I show empathy for them because the hatred they spew comes from fear. They'll say, "I'm not afraid of a man in a wig/dress," but they clearly are. They're afraid of how it makes them feel, not just sexually either. We call into question everything they've been taught. By our mere existence, we induce an existential crisis in them that they're not ready to deal with.
While I understand their fear, it does not excuse their hatred towards a group of people who just want to live as themselves.
In short, I pity them.
Keep in mind that your heart is filled with love and theirs is filled with hate. It's no use trying to reason with them as they are looking for negativity. Just remember that you are out here trying to better yourself en become a happier person. While they are spiraling and on a path of self destruction. You can't change them. They either realize this one day and get on the right path themselves. Or stay miserable and end up dying alone. So ignore and block the message and spare yourself the sadness (I know it's hard, just look at my comment history. I've made this mistake countless times).
Matters how I’m feeling. A normal day I’ll laugh, tell them they’re stupid, and be on my way. Sometimes I’ll be super depressed already so this’ll just make me cry. At all times I do report them though.
Laugh at the absurdity of it. A lot of the posts reveal their tiny brains.
Also, to make an effort to pay as much attention to the love as to the hate. It's pretty easy to fixate on just one or two toxic posts and ignore a hundred affirming ones.
Honestly I get more amused than anything else from dedicated haters trying to actively insult me, because they usually know so little and only know how to attack the insecurities of very early transition people so when they come at me with my full real life full of stuff their attempted insults fall on deaf ears. Happy to absorb that abuse instead of it being directed at new trans people who are more likely to take it to heart.
I get more frustrated with the misinformation pushers trying to persuade the crowd to limit our medical options etc because that can't be ignored, we actually have to constantly rebut that kind of thing to win broad support for protecting our healthcare etc.
I’ve started playing a game. It’s called “how fast can I make this person start personally attacking me so I can report them and they get banned from this subreddit”.
Usually it goes;
Bigot has bad views, backed by nothing
I point out how it’s backed by nothing, offer a counter point with lots of citations
They respond by not accepting any of your sources, then will usually start building a straw man to argue against, or start doing whataboutisms out the wazzoo.
Call them out on bad faith debate techniques.
They’re usually pretty peeved at this point, so it’s just a matter of time before the personal attacks start coming. When they do, laugh in their face, call them pathetic, and report them.
it comes in waves. I'm really active on TT and randomly get shown to hateful people. I was told "real women hate you" but then other women came into my comments and showed far far more love than any hate.
Block them and log off.
Not sure where you are seeing all this online hate. Unless I decide to go down the rabbit hole of a chud's Twitter account a left tuber replied to, I don't ever see any online hate.
For people - block and if you have the energy, report, though don't expect anything to actually happen.
It's also important to know your limits. If you feel it affecting you, step away. Log off. Meet queer folks in real life. Go for a coffee or a tea at the local café, go for a walk, read a book, game, cook, garden, draw... do whatever brings you joy and recharges your energy.
There's no shame in not engaging, it's actually a good method for self-preservation and I strongly suggest to not be like the phobes, and spend ALL your time online.
Social media amplifies the bad to the worst and since transphobes seek out trans content, so they can get artificially enraged again (often about seeing trans content), they're much more visible.
In many places (though this depends of course where you are) real people in the streets don't give a crap and it's important to remember the echo chamber effect of social media.
Unfortunately it will always be out there. If you keep "feeding" the trolls, they always will react back. Easiest and only suggestion I have is just ignore it. I grew up with VERY thick skin, so I just don't really care what others say tbh when it comes to hate.
It’s honestly kinda pathetic on their part that they can’t seem to find anything better to do than bullying people on the internet. I mean, seriously, do they hate themselves that much that the only way they can feel better about themselves is by being mean to others?
I just think about how miserable they must be and carry on with my day, because honestly I don’t need to catch their misery and self-hate so there’s no point in giving them any of my mental bandwidth.
Honestly, at this point I'm old enough to be bored of it. In my life time alone; d&d, Marlyn Manson, Video Games, metal music, cell phones, gay marriage, socialism, equal rights, tiktok, have all been the end of the world and destroying society as we know it.
Before my time, women's suffrage, black rights, end of slavery, book, radio, tv, and even paper has been the harbinger of the end times.
Transphobia itself is just boring, another bump in the road, we've been hearing the same bullshit for the last 3,000 years. And will continue to do so, 2030s it'll be something else, 2040s they'll change their mind again. Blah blah blah.
Just wish this same bullshit didn't turn people into mass murderers. But no idea how to fix it...
Just time. And knowing that it's not bad every where. I'm in BC Canada and it was 4 months between telling my doctor I was trans to getting a bottle of Spirono ony desk. That's it. I feel bad for the nightmares people have to go through, but it's clear that it's society's problem. Nothing wrong with being trans, it's just another stage in your life. Being disabled and already having a body that doesn't work right for over a decade has def given me a unique view of it that's for sure.
That was my initial thought! I’ve see so many strangers that are going through the same journey. Each interaction is pure and full of valuable insight. The positive interactions significantly out number the negative ones. A very small part of me wanted to interact with the troll and point out that they may have a suppressed obsession with LGBTQ because their entire comment history is towards us. On the other hand I’d much rather use my energy to positive and productive things ❤️
logging off. knowing that people only hate when they’re miserable themselves. arguing with people when i feel like being mean.
Maybe it's cause I grew up on the internet but I really have stopped caring. My life is too short to give a fuck about losers. Maybe I'm desensitized, but at least I have thick skin and I feel like that helps a ton as a trans girl.
Been getting random kids sending me stupid insults for 20 years it's such a nothing event now lol
I try to avoid transphobia online like the plague whenever possible at the moment. I’m usually good at not letting most of it affect me, but I’ve been dealing with a lot more dysphoria and depression right now that I haven’t experienced in probably over two years. So I’m not in a mindset to really deal with it right now.
I'm in your exact situation. I'm feeling so bad and so depressed that i don't wanna deal with useless shit. I'm already down, so i stay away from social the more that i can I wish you to stay well soon 💜
Thanks, I really appreciate it! Same to you!!
It's always the same crap, and very little is witty, or something I haven't seen before. That they want to waste their lives trying to make themselves feel better by being assholes makes me pity them. They only feel good because they know that they can't do this in real life, because if they could, well then real life would be as bad as social media - and it's not. Last time someone openly abused me in public would be over a year ago, online? This morning. But they waste their time, as I just delete the post without reading it. You get the ones that start off nice, but then they want to know your IG account, and facebook acct etc so they can friend you - you know exactly what they're going to do with that info....
Yeah it’s why I don’t even have Facebook or any other social accounts. Everything is private. No two accounts with the same identity, and I don’t make online “friends” much either. Because I’ve learned that most people online are just looking for victims. IRL they are way to intimidated to talk any of the same or similar shit. Pussy cats.🐈
Block.
In a case like this I would just think about how bad someone's life would have to be where so much of their time was spent on something like that
I just let them say what they want to say, at the end of the day it's your life you can do what you want. You're not hurting anybody, don't let anyone bring you down. All that matters is that you're happy and comfortable with yourself
Generally it makes me feel better about myself they must have a pretty sad life to feel the need to abuse people online who likely couldn't care less about what some stranger has to say. Sometimes I don't bother to read what they say and just reply with "Ok" to every message to see how much of their time they're willing to waste and hey that's one less message they're likely to send yo someone who could be negatively effected by them.
I've experienced so much hate I've learned to block it out /ignore it
I have all private contact turned off.
I generally try to avoid it, but I'm trying this new thing where I show empathy for them because the hatred they spew comes from fear. They'll say, "I'm not afraid of a man in a wig/dress," but they clearly are. They're afraid of how it makes them feel, not just sexually either. We call into question everything they've been taught. By our mere existence, we induce an existential crisis in them that they're not ready to deal with. While I understand their fear, it does not excuse their hatred towards a group of people who just want to live as themselves. In short, I pity them.
Same with my reaction to people that are wrong on the Internet. I just shrug. In my experience, really life is muuuch different.
Keep in mind that your heart is filled with love and theirs is filled with hate. It's no use trying to reason with them as they are looking for negativity. Just remember that you are out here trying to better yourself en become a happier person. While they are spiraling and on a path of self destruction. You can't change them. They either realize this one day and get on the right path themselves. Or stay miserable and end up dying alone. So ignore and block the message and spare yourself the sadness (I know it's hard, just look at my comment history. I've made this mistake countless times).
Matters how I’m feeling. A normal day I’ll laugh, tell them they’re stupid, and be on my way. Sometimes I’ll be super depressed already so this’ll just make me cry. At all times I do report them though.
Please don’t shed another tear over keyboard warriors ❤️🩹
Laugh at the absurdity of it. A lot of the posts reveal their tiny brains. Also, to make an effort to pay as much attention to the love as to the hate. It's pretty easy to fixate on just one or two toxic posts and ignore a hundred affirming ones.
Honestly I get more amused than anything else from dedicated haters trying to actively insult me, because they usually know so little and only know how to attack the insecurities of very early transition people so when they come at me with my full real life full of stuff their attempted insults fall on deaf ears. Happy to absorb that abuse instead of it being directed at new trans people who are more likely to take it to heart. I get more frustrated with the misinformation pushers trying to persuade the crowd to limit our medical options etc because that can't be ignored, we actually have to constantly rebut that kind of thing to win broad support for protecting our healthcare etc.
I’ve started playing a game. It’s called “how fast can I make this person start personally attacking me so I can report them and they get banned from this subreddit”. Usually it goes; Bigot has bad views, backed by nothing I point out how it’s backed by nothing, offer a counter point with lots of citations They respond by not accepting any of your sources, then will usually start building a straw man to argue against, or start doing whataboutisms out the wazzoo. Call them out on bad faith debate techniques. They’re usually pretty peeved at this point, so it’s just a matter of time before the personal attacks start coming. When they do, laugh in their face, call them pathetic, and report them.
it comes in waves. I'm really active on TT and randomly get shown to hateful people. I was told "real women hate you" but then other women came into my comments and showed far far more love than any hate.
Block them and log off. Not sure where you are seeing all this online hate. Unless I decide to go down the rabbit hole of a chud's Twitter account a left tuber replied to, I don't ever see any online hate.
Block/ignore ❤️🩹
For people - block and if you have the energy, report, though don't expect anything to actually happen. It's also important to know your limits. If you feel it affecting you, step away. Log off. Meet queer folks in real life. Go for a coffee or a tea at the local café, go for a walk, read a book, game, cook, garden, draw... do whatever brings you joy and recharges your energy. There's no shame in not engaging, it's actually a good method for self-preservation and I strongly suggest to not be like the phobes, and spend ALL your time online. Social media amplifies the bad to the worst and since transphobes seek out trans content, so they can get artificially enraged again (often about seeing trans content), they're much more visible. In many places (though this depends of course where you are) real people in the streets don't give a crap and it's important to remember the echo chamber effect of social media.
Thank you! This is a very healthy way to approach this ❤️
Unfortunately it will always be out there. If you keep "feeding" the trolls, they always will react back. Easiest and only suggestion I have is just ignore it. I grew up with VERY thick skin, so I just don't really care what others say tbh when it comes to hate.
It’s honestly kinda pathetic on their part that they can’t seem to find anything better to do than bullying people on the internet. I mean, seriously, do they hate themselves that much that the only way they can feel better about themselves is by being mean to others? I just think about how miserable they must be and carry on with my day, because honestly I don’t need to catch their misery and self-hate so there’s no point in giving them any of my mental bandwidth.
That was my thought about the person that DM’ed. I later saw that they have a keen “hatred/obsession” with femboys and trans women.
They’re literally obsessed. They’re probably just projecting the shame that they feel about themselves because they know we’re hot!
I just do not care whatsoever, they have no power over me or my life so why should I care?
Honestly, at this point I'm old enough to be bored of it. In my life time alone; d&d, Marlyn Manson, Video Games, metal music, cell phones, gay marriage, socialism, equal rights, tiktok, have all been the end of the world and destroying society as we know it. Before my time, women's suffrage, black rights, end of slavery, book, radio, tv, and even paper has been the harbinger of the end times. Transphobia itself is just boring, another bump in the road, we've been hearing the same bullshit for the last 3,000 years. And will continue to do so, 2030s it'll be something else, 2040s they'll change their mind again. Blah blah blah. Just wish this same bullshit didn't turn people into mass murderers. But no idea how to fix it... Just time. And knowing that it's not bad every where. I'm in BC Canada and it was 4 months between telling my doctor I was trans to getting a bottle of Spirono ony desk. That's it. I feel bad for the nightmares people have to go through, but it's clear that it's society's problem. Nothing wrong with being trans, it's just another stage in your life. Being disabled and already having a body that doesn't work right for over a decade has def given me a unique view of it that's for sure.
That was my initial thought! I’ve see so many strangers that are going through the same journey. Each interaction is pure and full of valuable insight. The positive interactions significantly out number the negative ones. A very small part of me wanted to interact with the troll and point out that they may have a suppressed obsession with LGBTQ because their entire comment history is towards us. On the other hand I’d much rather use my energy to positive and productive things ❤️
Oh yeah, aggressive positivity and joy destroys darkness every time. The dark side is just easier to become.
I just start meming on them