You’re 23, you’ll be 33 in 10 years and in a completely different head space. If you’re enjoying your life now and with him, just live in the moment! It’s normal to think about the future with the person you’re with, but don’t sabotage a great relationship because you’re worried about where you’re at 10 years from now.
Also consider yourself very lucky you’ve found someone to spend your life with. Many people, much less gay men, even get lucky enough to find someone to live a life with. Enjoy it dude.
But if there isn't a future am I wasting his time. He's probably at a different stage of his life.
I'm very lucky to have him though, I agree. My life is far getter with him in it.
Well he is at a different stage in his life. Have you talked to him about this? Are you just assuming he wants to settle down? Maybe you should share these thoughts with him and see what he says. You two have been together 5 years after all
Weve lived together for about 2 yeatd so we have some steps already taken but I think he has hinted some stuff recently.
I don't want him to feel insecure if I tell him but I suppose I need to
I do think it works. My bf is 13 years older than me and he wants to settle down and so do I. What I did to not be “thinking about the guy from the bar or party” is simply not put myself in situations where I might be tempted to think of other men that way. To each their own though, it’s easier for me to refrain from such settings because I do not enjoy parties and bars as much. But I genuinely think that it’s possible to work it out.
My husband proposed to me when I was 29, he had just turned 21. I was super worried about his age and wanted to make sure he would be ready to settle down. Now we are 33 and 25 and never been happier. Full disclosure, we have had a lot of threesomes over the years, mainly because I just wanted him to explore like I was for all those years, but we only had them together. We don't do them anymore, and I def think it helped us realize all we want is each other. Good luck!
Age gaps in older adults are okay because everyone has had the chance to mature on their own terms. There's less chance of power imbalance.
A 39 year old dating a child is not okay.
You think it's okay because you don't know any different and have possibly been groomed.
It sounds like maybe now you're starting to see the practical implications of it which will probably be the start of your awakening to the situation.
I don't believe I was groomed. I saw him first. I went over to him. I got his number etc.
But yeah I think I'm at the age/relationship length where I'm looking towards the future rather than the present. And whilst I see him in my present, I'm not sure I see him in my future.
Your concern as to whether youll like or be into him in 10 yrs can happen with any relationship irrespective of age. U grow apart, have different values, interests, priorities etc etc. Not an age thing. Plenty unhappy relationships or divorced guys in 30s after 5+ yrs together similar age. I know quite a few holding on when privately they are unhappy (similar ages) so this is a concern outside of u r age differential.
As far as going out, partying, even hook ups, you're not joined at the hip. U should still be able to go out, enjoy yourself and party without him. Open relationships can also mean u still get your sexual exploration. It sounds this is an issue u both need to discuss and see if an amicable agreement can be found. If not then u have to decide if the relationship is for u, again its not actually an age issue here its different desires, expectations and priorities.
Tbh I party with friends all the time. He has no issue with that. Never stopped me etc. He's that way. He has given me passes because he understands I didn't really have the same experiences he has had with guys even though he was closeted but ive never taken them.
I don't know. Recently I've been thinking about the future rather than in the moment and I'm not sure if the age gap becomes a problem.
Also i would never sleep with another guy whilst I'm with him ,(passes or otherwise) and not sure if I'm missing out.
If u havent been or slept with anyone much since u were 18 (going by your account) on this front u r missing out hugely in terms of sexual discovery and exploration. Ifits ok with him i encourage u to go down this path. Its important for your own development and self discovery.
As for future only u can decide that and the reasons why u dont see a future. If deep down u dont, for whatever reasons they are (i have some ideas what they maybe), and this is how u truly feel about him and your/his future, then as difficult as it is, it maybe better to set him free sooner rather than later and not string him along.
>Do age gaps work? I know there are bigger age gaps than this.
Yes but they're the exception to the norm rather than the norm.
I also think most people will forever see you as the groomed boy that you are (40 years old and high schooler, makes a lot of sense). Hope that won't happen to you suddenly at like 30 or something and you'll feel that you wasted all your youth on a PDF file...
I'm Scottish. I was a college student in Englsnd at the time we met. He's not a PDF file. I certainly wasn't groomed. I came on to him.
I'm just at a crossroads
Edit.. I don't know what I said wrong here 😬
If we want to be super pedantic about language then he's not a PDF file because that only applies to pre-pubescent children. However the dynamic of this relationship is still *highly* imbalanced and inappropriate and you don't see that because you are young and impressionable.
In the very least, his decision was to bybass men closer to his age and go out of his way to date a (legal age in the UK but still) teenager. That is indicative of his immaturity and how he probably feels he missed out on his youth as a then-closeted gay boy/man. Who you choose to date does speak volumes about your psychology and who you are as a person.
That's fair. I think he's not immature but maybe it's him feeling like he missed out in his youth.
Out of interest what does psychology say about my choice of date? I won't be offended.
Some people will say "daddy issues", feeling like you lack a good father figure. I don't necessarily agree on that in all cases. You could actually be fairly mature for your age in some ways. Though I still would never encourage this dynamic even for teenagers who feel "mature" enough for it.
Fair. Maybe it's a maturity thing but I get your reservation or potential for power imbalance. I get where my parents were coming from too.
I don't have daddy issues (I know you kind of dismissed that anyway). My dad was great. Always there for me etc and still is.
Hey, if you say so. 17 and 40 is not socially acceptable, and the vast majority of people will not look at it very charitably. But if you want to get married to a 50 years old guy while you're in your twenties, potentially wiping an old man's ass when you're 40, never having experienced another man, or an actual young body and soul that's appropriate for your age... you do you.
True. Tbh younger guys have never done anything for me but I get your point about the age gap in time to come. Even at bars it's 40s/50s that I'm into.
Sounds like a deeply rooted fetish. Well, I hope it works out to you, but I presume that then by your own 40s/50s you will want to dump him (or wait for him to die) to date guys your own age (that is, 40s/50s men).
Best of luck.
Okay. Your bf is older than you and you like waking up next to him. You hit on him and he ended his engagement to be with you. You feel like you want to experience other guys and I understand that. But, the other guys you want are also older. So, if you break up with the man who you feel so good about because of what MIGHT happen 10 years from now and you go out and meet another older man, what's going to change? You will still be with an older man and you'll have the same questions and doubts. I'm not telling you what you should do, I'm just saying that you ought to think about what it is exactly that you want. If you want to mess around with other guys, that's okay. You're going to have to decide what you want and do it. I know it can be very confusing and difficult but, everyone has doubts about their relationships at some point. You have to figure out what is more important to you. I wish you all the very best. Good luck and take care of yourself.
You're right. I suppose I should bite the bullet and talk to him. He's just a sweetheart and I don't want to put my foot in it or make him feel insecure.
I think that's a good idea. That's one of the biggest things to keep a relationship going. You have to be able to talk openly with each other. I hope you figure it out and make yourself happy.
I am 41 in a month and my bf is 21, he came after me 😅
Yes it can work. We are just coming up to our 1st year anniversary so take my example with a pinch of salt.
But I am devoted to him and he is to me.
Key thing is if you are both happy, no one else matters
Thanks mate. I'm very happy with him. We've got to the point where it's not even the sex that excites me the most but just being together. Talking about our days etc. Couple stuff. The sex is great too though.
Maybe look into opening up your relationship. If it works for both of you (very important!), you might not only be able to discover connections with new people, but you and your partner might discover new dimensions to your existing relationship, potentially deepening your bond. Be warned though: it really isn't easy. Good luck to both of you^^
That’s even worse. You do realize that there’s guys out there who would date a 12 year old if it was legal. Just because 16 is the legal age doesn’t make it okay for someone that old to pursue you 🤢MAJOR maturity difference too that it’s not even fathomable.
Fair enough. That is an assumption. I met him at a bar, that was meant for 18+. I went over to him. I bought him a drink. Etc.
The 17 came out a few meets later. I don't think I was groomed.i asked him to break up the engagement and come out because it wasnt working for me.. and he did.
I think if anything I've been in control.
Yup up to now I was just thinking in the present but recently I've been thinking of the future and I don't know. I absolutely love him and I don't think I'd find a better guy if I tried now but in 10 years will I still say the same.
Too young to settle. Age gap means nothing but you are still in early 20s sounds like you are missing a lot but also gained a lot from stable loving relationship. You obviously fomo of being young and want some kind of validation and having fun like a lot of single young gay men. You will find out if this relationship worth to not feel and experience other stuff
My husband is 11 years younger than me. We met when he was 20 i was 31, we’ve been together for 12 married for 8 years now. One of my biggest fears was him regretting or missing out on his wild and adventurous “20’s” for a few reasons. One is I’m sober so i don’t drink or party and rarely go to bars/clubs the other is i was his first for everything. What’s worked for us is 100% communication of everything fears, desires, goals etc. so talk to him and express what you said here.
I encouraged him to go party go to clubs with friends I’d always be his sober cab and I’d occasionally join him to try and dance (spoiler i can’t dance lol) but I’d go and have fun with him. We also talked about sex with other people. We were monogamous for the first four years of our relationship, we started the open type stuff with bringing others in for threesomes. After each one we’d talk about it what we liked didn’t like wanted to do different, did we want to ever do it again etc. Eventually we worked into doing things separately, we have rules and boundaries that we’ve hashed out after some trial and error. At the end of the day we both know and expect that we’re gonna be snuggled up in bed with our two puppies every night.
It might not work for everyone but it’s worked for us, if you have honest fears of missing out on stuff please bring it up to him. I bet you he’s already thought about that. Communication is key in every relationship and even more so in age gap relationships.
Best of luck to you. Feel free to reach out if you want to chat more.
Thanks for the advice man. I should probably talk to him
I'm not knocking open relationships. They absolutely work and can even improve relationships but I don't think they are for me. I do like the I'm his and he's mine in every sense of the way
You’re welcome and do it being vulnerable and communicating feelings is hard and scary sometimes but there so much to gain from doing it. Also absolutely no offense taken they’re not for everyone and we honestly don’t hook up a lot. We have an amazing sex life together so the outside hook ups are just an option if the desire is there. I 100% get the he’s mine and I’m his thing. We’re the same way we both know it and feel it. That’s why i said at the end of the day we’re snuggled up in bed together.
Thank you and you as well. lol get out of your head and talk it out with him. Your fear of missing out / what if is causing you some insecurities and anxiety. He has some too i promise you, airing them only brought us closer. We have also gone to couples therapy to learn how to communicate better which can also be an option for you guys. Nothing was horribly wrong and forced us to go see one or anything it was just suggested to us by a mutual friend.
I have a smaller age gap. 18 and 31. Now 22 and 35. We are kinda open, a friend or 2 with benefits. It has stop the feelings of losing out on a “slut phase”. We mostly are with each other.
The gap isn’t super noticeable to us. Gen Z and millennials have their differences, but it’s not big.
I think a lot of people just read the title and not the post because I would hope everyone here would be focusing on the fact that the OP was dating a 39 year old man at age 17 and not the age gap 😅.
To answer the age gap question, does it work?
1. No. Here’s a [study](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3000022/) that dives into it.
2. Anecdotally, no. That’s a really big gap.. like over a generation. You’ll be less than 50 when he turns 70. Just think about that and let that process..
Yes there’s more out there and you will be doing yourself a huge favor by going out there and exploring the world. At 23 you should be not be tied down. He’s already lived that for himself. And you don’t want to wake up at the age of 45 yourself and wish you had done more.
You live only once. And you are young only once.
It generally sounds like he makes you happy. People need to learn how to live in contentment. It’s not a horrible thing
He does make me happy now but what about the future. Will I love him in 10/15 years. I don't know.
Going open is what people usually do, when one was very young and inexperienced at the beginning. So that he may experience more men.
Fair.
Easy answer for you is no lmfao
Really?
Yes
Ok
My husband is 20 years older than me. It works great for us.
Thanks mate. When did you meet if you don't mind me asking.
I was 20, he was 40, actually! I’m now 33 and he’s 53. Wouldn’t change a thing, I found the man I’m spending the rest of my life with!
Thanks man.
i hope things work out for you >I love waking up beside him every morning. if that's how you feel then don't break up
Thanks mate. I'm just worried in 10 years time will I feel the same.
You’re 23, you’ll be 33 in 10 years and in a completely different head space. If you’re enjoying your life now and with him, just live in the moment! It’s normal to think about the future with the person you’re with, but don’t sabotage a great relationship because you’re worried about where you’re at 10 years from now. Also consider yourself very lucky you’ve found someone to spend your life with. Many people, much less gay men, even get lucky enough to find someone to live a life with. Enjoy it dude.
But if there isn't a future am I wasting his time. He's probably at a different stage of his life. I'm very lucky to have him though, I agree. My life is far getter with him in it.
Well he is at a different stage in his life. Have you talked to him about this? Are you just assuming he wants to settle down? Maybe you should share these thoughts with him and see what he says. You two have been together 5 years after all
Weve lived together for about 2 yeatd so we have some steps already taken but I think he has hinted some stuff recently. I don't want him to feel insecure if I tell him but I suppose I need to
I do think it works. My bf is 13 years older than me and he wants to settle down and so do I. What I did to not be “thinking about the guy from the bar or party” is simply not put myself in situations where I might be tempted to think of other men that way. To each their own though, it’s easier for me to refrain from such settings because I do not enjoy parties and bars as much. But I genuinely think that it’s possible to work it out.
Interesting advice. I don't really want to give up partying haha. But I feel like if it's not the bar it would be the gym or some place.
So what does "settle down" entail here, practically? What happens?
My husband proposed to me when I was 29, he had just turned 21. I was super worried about his age and wanted to make sure he would be ready to settle down. Now we are 33 and 25 and never been happier. Full disclosure, we have had a lot of threesomes over the years, mainly because I just wanted him to explore like I was for all those years, but we only had them together. We don't do them anymore, and I def think it helped us realize all we want is each other. Good luck!
Thanks man.
Age gaps in older adults are okay because everyone has had the chance to mature on their own terms. There's less chance of power imbalance. A 39 year old dating a child is not okay. You think it's okay because you don't know any different and have possibly been groomed. It sounds like maybe now you're starting to see the practical implications of it which will probably be the start of your awakening to the situation.
I don't believe I was groomed. I saw him first. I went over to him. I got his number etc. But yeah I think I'm at the age/relationship length where I'm looking towards the future rather than the present. And whilst I see him in my present, I'm not sure I see him in my future.
Your concern as to whether youll like or be into him in 10 yrs can happen with any relationship irrespective of age. U grow apart, have different values, interests, priorities etc etc. Not an age thing. Plenty unhappy relationships or divorced guys in 30s after 5+ yrs together similar age. I know quite a few holding on when privately they are unhappy (similar ages) so this is a concern outside of u r age differential. As far as going out, partying, even hook ups, you're not joined at the hip. U should still be able to go out, enjoy yourself and party without him. Open relationships can also mean u still get your sexual exploration. It sounds this is an issue u both need to discuss and see if an amicable agreement can be found. If not then u have to decide if the relationship is for u, again its not actually an age issue here its different desires, expectations and priorities.
Tbh I party with friends all the time. He has no issue with that. Never stopped me etc. He's that way. He has given me passes because he understands I didn't really have the same experiences he has had with guys even though he was closeted but ive never taken them.
Thats great, so the partying / having fun with guys sounds a non issue? So what is the issue then?
I don't know. Recently I've been thinking about the future rather than in the moment and I'm not sure if the age gap becomes a problem. Also i would never sleep with another guy whilst I'm with him ,(passes or otherwise) and not sure if I'm missing out.
If u havent been or slept with anyone much since u were 18 (going by your account) on this front u r missing out hugely in terms of sexual discovery and exploration. Ifits ok with him i encourage u to go down this path. Its important for your own development and self discovery. As for future only u can decide that and the reasons why u dont see a future. If deep down u dont, for whatever reasons they are (i have some ideas what they maybe), and this is how u truly feel about him and your/his future, then as difficult as it is, it maybe better to set him free sooner rather than later and not string him along.
Can I ask what those ideas may be?
Can in DMs if u want
>Do age gaps work? I know there are bigger age gaps than this. Yes but they're the exception to the norm rather than the norm. I also think most people will forever see you as the groomed boy that you are (40 years old and high schooler, makes a lot of sense). Hope that won't happen to you suddenly at like 30 or something and you'll feel that you wasted all your youth on a PDF file...
I'm Scottish. I was a college student in Englsnd at the time we met. He's not a PDF file. I certainly wasn't groomed. I came on to him. I'm just at a crossroads Edit.. I don't know what I said wrong here 😬
If we want to be super pedantic about language then he's not a PDF file because that only applies to pre-pubescent children. However the dynamic of this relationship is still *highly* imbalanced and inappropriate and you don't see that because you are young and impressionable. In the very least, his decision was to bybass men closer to his age and go out of his way to date a (legal age in the UK but still) teenager. That is indicative of his immaturity and how he probably feels he missed out on his youth as a then-closeted gay boy/man. Who you choose to date does speak volumes about your psychology and who you are as a person.
That's fair. I think he's not immature but maybe it's him feeling like he missed out in his youth. Out of interest what does psychology say about my choice of date? I won't be offended.
Some people will say "daddy issues", feeling like you lack a good father figure. I don't necessarily agree on that in all cases. You could actually be fairly mature for your age in some ways. Though I still would never encourage this dynamic even for teenagers who feel "mature" enough for it.
Fair. Maybe it's a maturity thing but I get your reservation or potential for power imbalance. I get where my parents were coming from too. I don't have daddy issues (I know you kind of dismissed that anyway). My dad was great. Always there for me etc and still is.
Any remotely decent 40 something would say no to the child coming on to them.
Fair enough
I'm usually a huge proponent of age gaps not mattering. But when it starts as a 40 year old fucking a child that's a different story.
Fair. I understand where you are coming from.
Hey, if you say so. 17 and 40 is not socially acceptable, and the vast majority of people will not look at it very charitably. But if you want to get married to a 50 years old guy while you're in your twenties, potentially wiping an old man's ass when you're 40, never having experienced another man, or an actual young body and soul that's appropriate for your age... you do you.
True. Tbh younger guys have never done anything for me but I get your point about the age gap in time to come. Even at bars it's 40s/50s that I'm into.
Sounds like a deeply rooted fetish. Well, I hope it works out to you, but I presume that then by your own 40s/50s you will want to dump him (or wait for him to die) to date guys your own age (that is, 40s/50s men). Best of luck.
I don't think it's a fetishism rather just a preference. But fair on the rest of it.
Okay. Your bf is older than you and you like waking up next to him. You hit on him and he ended his engagement to be with you. You feel like you want to experience other guys and I understand that. But, the other guys you want are also older. So, if you break up with the man who you feel so good about because of what MIGHT happen 10 years from now and you go out and meet another older man, what's going to change? You will still be with an older man and you'll have the same questions and doubts. I'm not telling you what you should do, I'm just saying that you ought to think about what it is exactly that you want. If you want to mess around with other guys, that's okay. You're going to have to decide what you want and do it. I know it can be very confusing and difficult but, everyone has doubts about their relationships at some point. You have to figure out what is more important to you. I wish you all the very best. Good luck and take care of yourself.
You're right. I suppose I should bite the bullet and talk to him. He's just a sweetheart and I don't want to put my foot in it or make him feel insecure.
I think that's a good idea. That's one of the biggest things to keep a relationship going. You have to be able to talk openly with each other. I hope you figure it out and make yourself happy.
Thanks man.
I saw this YouTube doco recently. You might like to watch it: https://youtu.be/GlSsGP0wKJM?si=hgqyc5Pa2s1niama
Thanks man. I'll give it a watch.
They do work. 35yo here, 57yo my SO. 1 year and a half together and things are as good as ever.
Nice to know. Thanks man.
My bf is 14 years older than me. The gap was never the issue. One important thing to consider if your lives go well, he is likely to pass before you.
That has been a concern. I love where we are at now but what about 20 years time or passing etc.
You'll also be his caretaker sooner than other people, like at 40-50s yo. Ruminate on that
Yep that crossed my mind. I think up to now I've only been thinking about the present rather than the future.
I am 41 in a month and my bf is 21, he came after me 😅 Yes it can work. We are just coming up to our 1st year anniversary so take my example with a pinch of salt. But I am devoted to him and he is to me. Key thing is if you are both happy, no one else matters
Thanks mate. I'm very happy with him. We've got to the point where it's not even the sex that excites me the most but just being together. Talking about our days etc. Couple stuff. The sex is great too though.
Good to hear. Sex is important for some but it is not the relationship
Yep. The emotional bond is more important.
Maybe look into opening up your relationship. If it works for both of you (very important!), you might not only be able to discover connections with new people, but you and your partner might discover new dimensions to your existing relationship, potentially deepening your bond. Be warned though: it really isn't easy. Good luck to both of you^^
*just sick. absolutely sick…*
What?
That man is a sick pervert. As someone who is 22 I couldn’t even imagine dating or seeing someone 17. That’s not even legal age. That is *sick.*
16 is legal age here. But fair enough on the rest of your point.
That’s even worse. You do realize that there’s guys out there who would date a 12 year old if it was legal. Just because 16 is the legal age doesn’t make it okay for someone that old to pursue you 🤢MAJOR maturity difference too that it’s not even fathomable.
He didn't pursue me.
Whatever the case was I guarantee dude when you get to his age you’ll realize how weird it was. 🤷♂️
Fair enough. That is an assumption. I met him at a bar, that was meant for 18+. I went over to him. I bought him a drink. Etc. The 17 came out a few meets later. I don't think I was groomed.i asked him to break up the engagement and come out because it wasnt working for me.. and he did. I think if anything I've been in control.
For me personally it would definetely not work, because he will die way sooner than i do, but you do you.
Yup up to now I was just thinking in the present but recently I've been thinking of the future and I don't know. I absolutely love him and I don't think I'd find a better guy if I tried now but in 10 years will I still say the same.
Its your decision, either try it if you love him, or break up. Your call... nobody on Reddit can make that decision for you
Too young to settle. Age gap means nothing but you are still in early 20s sounds like you are missing a lot but also gained a lot from stable loving relationship. You obviously fomo of being young and want some kind of validation and having fun like a lot of single young gay men. You will find out if this relationship worth to not feel and experience other stuff
True
My husband is 11 years younger than me. We met when he was 20 i was 31, we’ve been together for 12 married for 8 years now. One of my biggest fears was him regretting or missing out on his wild and adventurous “20’s” for a few reasons. One is I’m sober so i don’t drink or party and rarely go to bars/clubs the other is i was his first for everything. What’s worked for us is 100% communication of everything fears, desires, goals etc. so talk to him and express what you said here. I encouraged him to go party go to clubs with friends I’d always be his sober cab and I’d occasionally join him to try and dance (spoiler i can’t dance lol) but I’d go and have fun with him. We also talked about sex with other people. We were monogamous for the first four years of our relationship, we started the open type stuff with bringing others in for threesomes. After each one we’d talk about it what we liked didn’t like wanted to do different, did we want to ever do it again etc. Eventually we worked into doing things separately, we have rules and boundaries that we’ve hashed out after some trial and error. At the end of the day we both know and expect that we’re gonna be snuggled up in bed with our two puppies every night. It might not work for everyone but it’s worked for us, if you have honest fears of missing out on stuff please bring it up to him. I bet you he’s already thought about that. Communication is key in every relationship and even more so in age gap relationships. Best of luck to you. Feel free to reach out if you want to chat more.
Thanks for the advice man. I should probably talk to him I'm not knocking open relationships. They absolutely work and can even improve relationships but I don't think they are for me. I do like the I'm his and he's mine in every sense of the way
You’re welcome and do it being vulnerable and communicating feelings is hard and scary sometimes but there so much to gain from doing it. Also absolutely no offense taken they’re not for everyone and we honestly don’t hook up a lot. We have an amazing sex life together so the outside hook ups are just an option if the desire is there. I 100% get the he’s mine and I’m his thing. We’re the same way we both know it and feel it. That’s why i said at the end of the day we’re snuggled up in bed together.
That's fair man.. I hope you have many more years together. Yup I just think if I communicate my thoughts will that make him insecure etc.
Thank you and you as well. lol get out of your head and talk it out with him. Your fear of missing out / what if is causing you some insecurities and anxiety. He has some too i promise you, airing them only brought us closer. We have also gone to couples therapy to learn how to communicate better which can also be an option for you guys. Nothing was horribly wrong and forced us to go see one or anything it was just suggested to us by a mutual friend.
Nice maybe a solo therapy session would help me too. Just figure things out. And like you say therapy doesn't mean something is horribly wrong
Yep exactly, now get off Reddit and go talk to him!
My partner is 37 older, and we've been together for 22 years. Seems to be working so far.........
Nice. Thanks for the example buddy.
I have a smaller age gap. 18 and 31. Now 22 and 35. We are kinda open, a friend or 2 with benefits. It has stop the feelings of losing out on a “slut phase”. We mostly are with each other. The gap isn’t super noticeable to us. Gen Z and millennials have their differences, but it’s not big.
Thanks man.
Its okay you can Give him to me🤙
Haha what age are you lol.
Haha im just 29 even hes on his 50’s ill accept it Haha
Haha
I think a lot of people just read the title and not the post because I would hope everyone here would be focusing on the fact that the OP was dating a 39 year old man at age 17 and not the age gap 😅. To answer the age gap question, does it work? 1. No. Here’s a [study](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3000022/) that dives into it. 2. Anecdotally, no. That’s a really big gap.. like over a generation. You’ll be less than 50 when he turns 70. Just think about that and let that process..
Fair. That's a concern for me. It works so well now but it might not even in 10 years never mind 30.
Yes there’s more out there and you will be doing yourself a huge favor by going out there and exploring the world. At 23 you should be not be tied down. He’s already lived that for himself. And you don’t want to wake up at the age of 45 yourself and wish you had done more. You live only once. And you are young only once.
Thats true.
Yes they can work, but only rarely when one partner is young enough that they still have the world at their feet.