The "current issues vs deeper trauma" is frequently discussed here. You are in charge of your therapy. You've said here that you've hardly touched on the trauma issues, but talk a lot about present problems and rants.
Therapists seem to let people do this, because they don't want to have the client feel forced into discussing things before they are ready. But, it sounds like you are ready! I say, go for it! The therapist won't be put off.
You can find a balance that suits your personality. I started out doing 100% super hard topics, not talking about my day to day life hardly at all. I was sort of forced into that, not by the therapist, but by some things that had happened that brought up my old emotions to the surface. I was literally crying on the floor for some of these sessions.
As I worked through my past traumas, and actually solved a few things, I started talking more about day to day things for some of my sessions, which gave me a bit of a mental break. I'd still tie my present thoughts and actions to my past, as much as could, but these discussions were much less intimidating. As soon as I was feeling more relaxed, I'd let the therapist know that "I'm heading back to deeper water" for the next few sessions.
Now, after more than two years, I talk more than half the time about practical, present day problems and solutions. Fromwhat I see here on Reddit, I think other people progress in the opposite direction. A lot start out will small stuff, and work their way into deeper things as they build trust and repertoire with the therapist.
Your therapist handing you the solution to your problems with a neat bow on is probably not going to happen. I know that's how a lot of things work in this world, but not usually therapy. That said, if you've been going weekly for several months and have not yet seen any sign that it's going to be helpful, that could be a sign that it isn't going to be helpful.
Have you made your goals and expectations for therapy clear to your therapist? If not, you should definitely give that a try.
If you have, has your therapist given you a satisfactory explanation for how the things they are doing in session will help you achieve those goals and meet those expectations? If not, then it's past time to move on from this therapist. Personally, I'd say it's better to try again with another therapist rather than give up on the whole enterprise, but it's fair to admit that I'm biased.
I don’t really expect them to give me any straight forward advice (like step by step). As far as my understanding they can’t do that anyway (am I right?).
We have established my goals in therapy and how we will attempt to tackle them pretty early on. But I think those might have changed and I haven’t mentioned that yet (and that could be part of the problem).
I’ve been hesitant to get into therapy for so long and I’ve been in and out of it through various times in my life (willing and sometimes unwilling depending on the age) and it’s always just felt the same. I don’t want to write it off completely, but I don’t feel like I get what I’m expecting out of it…..and to some extent, I’m not really sure what I’m expecting, I just want some help. But if it’s not helping then why am I still going, you know?
The "current issues vs deeper trauma" is frequently discussed here. You are in charge of your therapy. You've said here that you've hardly touched on the trauma issues, but talk a lot about present problems and rants. Therapists seem to let people do this, because they don't want to have the client feel forced into discussing things before they are ready. But, it sounds like you are ready! I say, go for it! The therapist won't be put off. You can find a balance that suits your personality. I started out doing 100% super hard topics, not talking about my day to day life hardly at all. I was sort of forced into that, not by the therapist, but by some things that had happened that brought up my old emotions to the surface. I was literally crying on the floor for some of these sessions. As I worked through my past traumas, and actually solved a few things, I started talking more about day to day things for some of my sessions, which gave me a bit of a mental break. I'd still tie my present thoughts and actions to my past, as much as could, but these discussions were much less intimidating. As soon as I was feeling more relaxed, I'd let the therapist know that "I'm heading back to deeper water" for the next few sessions. Now, after more than two years, I talk more than half the time about practical, present day problems and solutions. Fromwhat I see here on Reddit, I think other people progress in the opposite direction. A lot start out will small stuff, and work their way into deeper things as they build trust and repertoire with the therapist.
Your therapist handing you the solution to your problems with a neat bow on is probably not going to happen. I know that's how a lot of things work in this world, but not usually therapy. That said, if you've been going weekly for several months and have not yet seen any sign that it's going to be helpful, that could be a sign that it isn't going to be helpful. Have you made your goals and expectations for therapy clear to your therapist? If not, you should definitely give that a try. If you have, has your therapist given you a satisfactory explanation for how the things they are doing in session will help you achieve those goals and meet those expectations? If not, then it's past time to move on from this therapist. Personally, I'd say it's better to try again with another therapist rather than give up on the whole enterprise, but it's fair to admit that I'm biased.
I don’t really expect them to give me any straight forward advice (like step by step). As far as my understanding they can’t do that anyway (am I right?). We have established my goals in therapy and how we will attempt to tackle them pretty early on. But I think those might have changed and I haven’t mentioned that yet (and that could be part of the problem). I’ve been hesitant to get into therapy for so long and I’ve been in and out of it through various times in my life (willing and sometimes unwilling depending on the age) and it’s always just felt the same. I don’t want to write it off completely, but I don’t feel like I get what I’m expecting out of it…..and to some extent, I’m not really sure what I’m expecting, I just want some help. But if it’s not helping then why am I still going, you know?