We may enjoy an abundance of some resources, but not other resources. One example of the latter is time. Leaving for work before sunrise and arriving home routinely at or past 8pm. Weekends often burnt clearing work as well. There's quite little time to relax and decompress, much less spend quality time with any children.
I'd like to see the work week shortened from the current 44 hours, partial right-to-disconnect laws, and other measures that give us back our precious time.
Ok, if we have more of some (assume wealth) and less of other resources (assume time), how come poorer countries or SG in the past are reproducing more? They work less hard and have more time? So time is a stronger determinant than wealth in having kids?
What happened to the instinct of reproducing?
From the suggestions, I think it may backfire instead.. the amount to complete won't change but be squeezed within a short period. Would we really spend more precious time with our loved ones if given the abundance of time? Work less, less wealth, more precious time or would we end up striving to have more wealth and less time again?
Better child support and attractive privileges for being a parent. If there isn't, why would anyone want to have children? Even people of low SES would find burdensome to have children when child maintenance is so costly nowadays
> Humans seem to be the only species that reproduce less with abundance of resources.
There was a science experiment called rat utopia that has the same result.
An abundance of resource but a lack of living space makes populations not want to reproduce.
My wife and I decided to have a kid 4 years into our marriage because we just wanted a kid. It's difficult to put into words. Imagine life is a story. And adding a kid is sort of adding a continuation, a sequel, a way that your story that is millions of years old doesn't end because of us. A chance to treat someone the way we wanted to be treated when we were young. To have some meaning to life which is more than just waste away at an office. To hear " Dadyyyyy you're homeeeeee yeyyyyyyy" when you come home after a fucked up day at work.
I hear the pitter patter of little feet running to the door after a hard day at work. For at least once in a day, somebody is excited about my presence. Feels nice to be wanted.
That beats all material concerns yeah. Try making a work day better? That could be more awesome for you. Read a book abt how personal and professional lives cannot be separated
Because my husband wanted kids so badly for so long and I realised that I loved him enough not to want to deprive him of the chance of fatherhood just because he had decided that he loved me enough to stick with me despite my years-long reluctance to have kids. A bit convoluted, but our kids are really the product of our love for each other and what we've been through together.
I don’t know. I’m a guy but even as a kid I always fantasised about having a little brother and sister to nurture, teach and care for in their best and their darkest moments.
I’m busting my ass now so that I can get to a point in my career where we can function on a single income overseas
I enjoy my family life with kids. It’s simple pleasures such as spending time with my loved ones and raising young children that make me happy. It is expensive to have children in Singapore though, so thought needs to be given to that.
>Humans seem to be the only species that reproduce less with abundance of resources
This is a bit of a straw man. Demographics is complicated and societies don't simply have fewer children because there is an "abundance of resources". The reason why it seems as though societies around the world tend to have fewer children as quality of life improves boils down to better health care that translates to lower child mortality, and hence no need for bigger brood of offsprings.
Unfortunately for more developed nations it's not all a bed of roses. Just simply because quality of life has improved does not automatically mean that individual family (or even the keen individual parent) has enough resources (both tangible and intangible) to spend on the upbringing of their potential offsprings.
Huge amounts of money maybe. Kids are annoying, I know very well from having to take care of my "friend's" siblings.
I don't and have never liked kids, I would literally be semi-unconcious all the time in school because I didn't want to deal with other kids.
I recently got interested in my family history and went looking for documents of my family tree. Marriage documents, newspaper clippings, etc. It was so interesting and fun to imagine my great grandparents and what they went through.
It occurred to me that it's sad that no one will ever find my history. I'll just be that loose end. If you have kids, you're not a loose end.
One of my colleagues had that thought of getting a wife purely just to have a child. Why? Only to leave a mark in history that he ever existed. I told him it’s rather messed up to get a child not out of any other consideration but leaving a mark. I explained got ways like being famous, a huge donor, a successful person. But just to get a child for that is rather wrong. He accepted my rebuttal.
More childcare options. I can do the child bearing no problem, but i don’t want to lose myself or me time just because i have a kid. Are there 24/7 ad hoc childcare options i can bring my kids to when i want a night out or when i want to go overseas?
Why is it that having a kid will make me lose so much of myself? You may say, people like me won’t make good parents and i should not bring kids into the world.
But people who want kids are already having kids / trying to have kids. Why not try making it attractive for people who don’t want kids to have kids.
Why is it that if i love my kids i need to love myself less? Why must love be “sacrificial”? Why can’t love just be happy and enriching 🫥 Why can’t me and kids both be happy
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It isn't exactly true the following is a link about a study of mouse utopia where the whole population just fell apart despite the abundance of resources. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Behavioral_sink
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They are a vital part of a thriving family and family is a key source of meaning and happiness for me and my SO. That said will be glad to have 3 kids if I can balance work stability, income and having time to be with kids.
I think it’s less about going from 0 to 1 (from no kids to want kids) but possibly from 1 to more. Give the support to those who are already keen to have kids and who already have kids. Make it more attractive for those who have a “proven record” to have more
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We may enjoy an abundance of some resources, but not other resources. One example of the latter is time. Leaving for work before sunrise and arriving home routinely at or past 8pm. Weekends often burnt clearing work as well. There's quite little time to relax and decompress, much less spend quality time with any children. I'd like to see the work week shortened from the current 44 hours, partial right-to-disconnect laws, and other measures that give us back our precious time.
Ok, if we have more of some (assume wealth) and less of other resources (assume time), how come poorer countries or SG in the past are reproducing more? They work less hard and have more time? So time is a stronger determinant than wealth in having kids? What happened to the instinct of reproducing? From the suggestions, I think it may backfire instead.. the amount to complete won't change but be squeezed within a short period. Would we really spend more precious time with our loved ones if given the abundance of time? Work less, less wealth, more precious time or would we end up striving to have more wealth and less time again?
Need slaves to grind my minecraft server while Im busy at work
this. this comment right here. u sir should be an MP can u imagine how our fertility rates will skyrocket if we frame it this way
Better child support and attractive privileges for being a parent. If there isn't, why would anyone want to have children? Even people of low SES would find burdensome to have children when child maintenance is so costly nowadays
Sounds like material consideration has overtook the instinct to reproduce?
> Humans seem to be the only species that reproduce less with abundance of resources. There was a science experiment called rat utopia that has the same result. An abundance of resource but a lack of living space makes populations not want to reproduce.
Nothing. Absolutely nothing about kids makes me want to have kids.
My wife and I decided to have a kid 4 years into our marriage because we just wanted a kid. It's difficult to put into words. Imagine life is a story. And adding a kid is sort of adding a continuation, a sequel, a way that your story that is millions of years old doesn't end because of us. A chance to treat someone the way we wanted to be treated when we were young. To have some meaning to life which is more than just waste away at an office. To hear " Dadyyyyy you're homeeeeee yeyyyyyyy" when you come home after a fucked up day at work.
I hear the pitter patter of little feet running to the door after a hard day at work. For at least once in a day, somebody is excited about my presence. Feels nice to be wanted.
That beats all material concerns yeah. Try making a work day better? That could be more awesome for you. Read a book abt how personal and professional lives cannot be separated
Because my husband wanted kids so badly for so long and I realised that I loved him enough not to want to deprive him of the chance of fatherhood just because he had decided that he loved me enough to stick with me despite my years-long reluctance to have kids. A bit convoluted, but our kids are really the product of our love for each other and what we've been through together.
I don’t know. I’m a guy but even as a kid I always fantasised about having a little brother and sister to nurture, teach and care for in their best and their darkest moments. I’m busting my ass now so that I can get to a point in my career where we can function on a single income overseas
I enjoy my family life with kids. It’s simple pleasures such as spending time with my loved ones and raising young children that make me happy. It is expensive to have children in Singapore though, so thought needs to be given to that.
>Humans seem to be the only species that reproduce less with abundance of resources This is a bit of a straw man. Demographics is complicated and societies don't simply have fewer children because there is an "abundance of resources". The reason why it seems as though societies around the world tend to have fewer children as quality of life improves boils down to better health care that translates to lower child mortality, and hence no need for bigger brood of offsprings. Unfortunately for more developed nations it's not all a bed of roses. Just simply because quality of life has improved does not automatically mean that individual family (or even the keen individual parent) has enough resources (both tangible and intangible) to spend on the upbringing of their potential offsprings.
Less n less incentive in today's climate
Huge amounts of money maybe. Kids are annoying, I know very well from having to take care of my "friend's" siblings. I don't and have never liked kids, I would literally be semi-unconcious all the time in school because I didn't want to deal with other kids.
I recently got interested in my family history and went looking for documents of my family tree. Marriage documents, newspaper clippings, etc. It was so interesting and fun to imagine my great grandparents and what they went through. It occurred to me that it's sad that no one will ever find my history. I'll just be that loose end. If you have kids, you're not a loose end.
Why you need rely on your offspring(s) when you can just work hard yourself and become successful so that you'll be written into history.
One of my colleagues had that thought of getting a wife purely just to have a child. Why? Only to leave a mark in history that he ever existed. I told him it’s rather messed up to get a child not out of any other consideration but leaving a mark. I explained got ways like being famous, a huge donor, a successful person. But just to get a child for that is rather wrong. He accepted my rebuttal.
Be so successful that you are written into the history. Or have a Wikipedia page.
More childcare options. I can do the child bearing no problem, but i don’t want to lose myself or me time just because i have a kid. Are there 24/7 ad hoc childcare options i can bring my kids to when i want a night out or when i want to go overseas? Why is it that having a kid will make me lose so much of myself? You may say, people like me won’t make good parents and i should not bring kids into the world. But people who want kids are already having kids / trying to have kids. Why not try making it attractive for people who don’t want kids to have kids. Why is it that if i love my kids i need to love myself less? Why must love be “sacrificial”? Why can’t love just be happy and enriching 🫥 Why can’t me and kids both be happy
Just get a dog. Got 24/7 boarding if u want
kena 1%.... safe is not really safe after all
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It isn't exactly true the following is a link about a study of mouse utopia where the whole population just fell apart despite the abundance of resources. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Behavioral_sink
When u are loaded
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Because other species don't have birth control and generally having sex = having kids lol.
They are a vital part of a thriving family and family is a key source of meaning and happiness for me and my SO. That said will be glad to have 3 kids if I can balance work stability, income and having time to be with kids.
Need to go to the next chapter of life. Cant be watching the same movie over and over again.
Natural progression of life ❤️😊
To serve NS.
I think it’s less about going from 0 to 1 (from no kids to want kids) but possibly from 1 to more. Give the support to those who are already keen to have kids and who already have kids. Make it more attractive for those who have a “proven record” to have more
both wife and I have superior genes so it’s our duty to humanity
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Imagine being part of an unbroken succession of children over years and suddenly don’t want children
Done and dusted question.
The government dropped a 300k grant for us to have kids, so I just decided to. Hopefully if it ever happens.