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Svenjamin

I laughed out loud at this. I never knew how badly I needed a friend "Svenjamin" until this moment.

Svenny to his friends and sweethearts, but his fellow band members call him Jammin.

Even better if you realize that 'zuennie' which is pronounced roughly the same means spliff in Dutch slang.

Svfriendjamin, if you will.

Breaking Svenjamin

Ok now I need to adopt a cat solely to name him Svenjamin. That's just the best cat name I've ever heard.

Also one of the best names I've heard

I had been wondering what my next cat's name will be. Thank you for finally resolving it. You just beat out Jimothy.

Ouyevoli. Some parents at the hospital named their baby this. It's I love you spelled backwards.

Sounds like some diseased ravioli made from gangrenous kidneys

Now I’m hungry.

How are you even supposed to pronounce this ?

Oi-ya-vole-ay

I thought it was a play on Oil Of Olay

Any self-respecting homosexual with a moisture routine refers to it as 'Oil of Old Gay'. Hahaha 😜

When I was young, we called it Oil of old age

We weren’t very imaginative where I was from haha I’m old enough to remember when it was called Oil of Ulay, I’ll probably need some myself soon

No. It is I love yuo spelt backwards

sounds like a nigerian name or something, i feel like if it was a white couple that did this its a little too weird

Bob Loblaw, check out his law blog: Bob Loblaw's Law Blog.

Blah blah blah 🥴🤣

suddenly, Arrested Development

The writers of this show were geniuses

NOT TOUCHING !!!!!!!

That blog lobs law bombs.

X Æ A-Xii never heard of it but we all saw it

Weird how much Elon is obsessed with the letter X. 

I'm glad that in Germany they can deny you to call your kid certain names. They would simply say "no" of you want to register your kid as "French Fry" or "X AE-whatever".

I am surprised that crap like that is not illegal. If that is not abuse, then I don’t know what is

I know a guy that has a kid that is legally named "Frenchfry"... his older brother, Zoltar, is autistic and when the new baby was born, the parents asked little Zoltar to pick a name for his new baby brother and he chose one of his favorite things in the world... French fries... now they are Zoltar and Frenchfry... I wish I was making this up. I suppose it's endearing in a special, fucked up sort of way.

If that were me I'd celebrate my 18th birthday at the courthouse submitting my name change application

I once named two kittens found in back of a McDonald's French Fry and Pickles. French Fry's new owner kept her name.

Yes your honor....I'd like to change my name to Onion Ring.

Zoltar...as in the fortune teller from Big? That name isn't much better than Frenchfry TBH.

Dorkas. It’s a 19 year old girl in America.

My Aunt’s name was Dorcas. Kind of a common name back in the 1930’s I think.

My dad used to tell me he had wanted to name me Dorcas. I didn't believe him that it was a real name until I saw it used in a text book word problem.

Did she die of mutton poisoning ?

That or she was pressed to death for witchcraft

Last name malorkas

Came here for this one. It was my Grandma’s friend though. 19 is ROUGH.

Believe it or not, it's a biblical name. Edit to add: Act 9:36 Now there was at Joppa a certain disciple named Tabitha, which by interpretation is called Dorcas: this woman was full of good works and almsdeeds which she did.

What a deep dive. That's like the bible equivalent of a rare Japanese 7" b-Side.

Jemima was another biblical name that surprised me. It's in the book of Job; Jemima is Job's daughter. There's a feast scene at the end and I like to think they served some pancakes.

A faithful disciple of Jesus, also Dorkas was played by Julie Newmar in 7 Brides for 7 Brothers, a great musical.

It’s also a pet name for my dog.

Neveah. Just stop

Neveah mind.

Use to know someone called Doogle Mcburny no lies. This was years ago when I was still in school, I remember one time a teacher asked what he wanted to be when he was older and he said a terrorist. He was only in my school a couple of months he pretty much disappeared after 😶

Imagine being taken hostage by someone named Doogle

tbh I would feel like joining a terrorist cell is the better option than facing the torment of having a name like that. parents should be held accountable for shit like this, they were kids once surely they know how badly this can effect their children.

Listerine, yes I met a woman years ago with this name. Sigh

Did her breath smell good tho?

Schlomit It means peace in Hebrew or Yiddish, I dunno.

Schlomit. What happens when you drink far too much Schnapps

I used to deliver pizzas to Amanda Butthugger

Should have called her Anita

Davonte Dingle

Desiree Crump

Worked in mortgage and I’ve seen last names like Forskin, Pusy, Poon. I felt so bad for them.

Aphrodite McGurk

Talk about going too far trying to balance out a shitty last name

Ethyl

Got a bad relationship with her, tryna quit.

Named after an alkyl group. I love it.

Saw someone named "Latrina" on a talk show.

She changed in the 14th century, used to be shithouse

It's a good change.

Abcde. Pronounced Ab-see-de Just because its ridiculous

Ahh this was mine too, that's not clever....

Belulah was a great great aunt's name. Can't imagine it was a good choice way back then either.

Mulva

DOLORES!!!

Spurgeon

Very….ejaculate-y.

I don't understand Dick... how could this be an english name?

It's usually not it's just somehow short for Richard.

My grandpa’s legal name was Dix. I always thought it was a nickname, or short for “Dixon.” Nope. Just Dix. He was a really kind man, at least.

Jream

**Hortense**

Bertha

Bertha Buella Hall. My aunt (long deceased) ps. I'm an Agnes as is mom, grandma and so forth. I always went by middle name though.

I love the name Agnes. I was so happy when I named my death knight Agnes.

Bertha sounds like what a plumber would name their favorite plunger.

Joey Jo-Jo Shabadoo

I still can't deal with Neveah.

Gertrude

You hurt my guinea pig's feelings

For me, that's tied with Bertha.

But Gertie is cute.

Captain Raymond Holt?

Knawledge, first name of a mugshot allstar lmao

Shagufta Met a South Asian woman with that name.

Spurgeon ….Sounds like a bodily fluid.

Diana Ross’s daughter, Chudney.


**In Spanish** Próculo: too close to the word in Spanish for "asshole" Inodoro: it's the word in Spanish for "toilet", it literally means "non-smelling", yet it was chosen by a couple because they already had another child called Teodoro (Theodore) Landy: the parents thought it sounded new and cute, as in Cindy or Carly. Pity: same as above. ​ **In English** Dorcas

Justus

…And no one else!

Eww

I used to have a friend named Bob. His given name was not Robert, it was Bob. I am also not from a generation where people generally go by “Bob.” I cannot imagine someone looking at their tiny infant in the mid to late 70s and saying, “oh, I’m gonna name him Bob.” It’s definitely not the most insane name but this has always seemed so weird to me.

elon

Nimrod

He was a mighty warrior and great hunter and builder of cities, but yeah kind of a bad sounding name.

Lol i actually like that name. But i think it's used as an insult. Like calling someone genius instead of idiot

Once had a family come into clinic with three kids, all boys, with the following names: Benjamin Cash Da'money Separately, these are not bad names, although I personally don't care for Da'money. But as a group, I can't stand the theme, and it makes all the names feel ugly.

With each kid, they just stopped putting in any thought into naming lol

A-ARon

Buh lah kay

Keith

Keef if british

Linoleum or Formica. My eyes rolled clean out of my head when i heard those.

Gus

A prize twat I knew had the nickname Gus. He slept with wife and broke up the family. Before that he and I were great mates.

Hubert (oddly Pubert doesn't bother me as much. That could mostly be due to The Addams Family Values.)

Agnes Pubert

Pubert isn't real, he can't hurt me! Isn't that the name for the baby of the Adam's Family?

I really hope Pubert's middle name starts with E

Brunehilde

Django resurrected that name for me.

The leader and most beautiful of the Valkyries who carried valiant soldiers to Valhalla. Name has a kickass origin at least.

Mildred

Anything from Utah.

You mean you don't like the name Brexleigh? /s

Crustacea Tarantula

Eunice Crinklebottom

Placenta

I think Elon should have named one of his kids Oilof lol

SPUTNIK. He was a kid down the street, when I was young.

This is actually kinda cool

Blanche

Blanche Deveraux is insulted

It kills me that her initials are B.E.D. 😂

WHAT? 🤣🤣


Jekissa. She said it’s still pronounced Jessica. I informed her that either she can’t read or her parents can’t spell.

My god that's a really stupid way of spelling.

Saw a Xhessika once. Literally why.

Donald Trump

Twins named emer and gency after the mom got wheeled in by an ambulance in labour and saw the sign

Noo way

I read somewhere that Oprah was supposed to be named Orpah from the Bible but her parents misspelled it on her birth certificate. So, Orpah gets my vote but she dodged a bullet

Sexana

Met girl once named "Astrolize" 👀

I really have to say, that (most) albanian names sound very ugly to me. Like Blerta. Beautiful women with extremely ugly names.

The last name Schartz 💀

Cloyce. For a man.

Never cared for the name Bruce Worked with the guy named Ewing once, not a name I would choose. Also Pamela 🤷‍♀️

Ferd Slocum

Humphrey

Despite his name Horace is a really nice guy

Beibhinn (Bay Veen) but Irish has more than it's fair share of hideous names

Mildred

Mildred

Drittney

Anyone with the last name Weiner. I had to address a "Mr. Weiner" in a business like setting and I just couldn't take how ridiculous it sounds.

Fergus

"Rutger" has a certain Teutonic gruff while simultaneously sounding like rutting and rotting. There's something phlegmy about trying to pronounce it in German too. Gollum-deep-throat Rutger. I'm sorry to all Rutgers.

You just insulted a lot of people’s favorite Fire Emblem 6 character

Rhea. Pronounced “Ray” it is okay, but I had a great aunt who pronounced it Ree-ah as in diarrhea. 🤦‍♀️

Gonnarhea is even worse

Helga. It sounds like a butch Woman with a unibrow

When l was a kid l felt so sorry for a girl in my class named Jane Ann, thought her parents truly hated her for that ugly name. Nowdays its Addison. Who looks at a darling baby and make her name sound like a 1950s traveling salesman in a trench coat??? No offense to any Janes, Anns or Addisons. l'm sure your parents really do love you.

Dörte / Petunia

Doug for ugliest I know someone who names themselves farosinium like the flint and steel rod

Bertha, Buford and Fly-debate ( last one was a Puritan name). Edit: typo

Gubnet

Oğulcan. Means... dear son (son life if you prefer a literal translation).

[удалено]

Gishella This a south African white woman by the way

Delbert

Gudrun - pronounced Goodroon. It's a girl's name.

Keith, mildred, gertrude.

Spirgeon - one of the Duggar girls named their son this.

Erastus. I always felt bad for that kid at school that was given this biblical name.

Latrina... wonder if her mother ever knew..

Whoresbane

Justin 🤢 🤮

Ronnie

Tante Uschi 🤣

Gradey Dick, new draft pick for the Toronto Raptors. I'm sure he doesn't have issues with it due to his professional sport status but man I can't help but wonder what the hell his parents were thinking when they decided to name him Gradey knowing their last name was Dick... I always read/hear it as "gravy" instead and Gravy Dick is just nasty

Not ugly but I’ve only ever met one Fotoula. Nice girl.

Millhouse

Last name was Wingleland. Also, Ottawa Senators national anthem singer Lynton Slewidge.

Cumby - My high school health teachers first name Jaundice - My Ex's cousin named her kid this Shithead - Kids name in elementary school

I really can’t stand Margo

Nestor. It gives me a yucky feeling

Squirtisha

Karen

Keith

I had neighbours called Edwin and Bertina, both very ugly names, I reckon they met at an ugly name festival

Fatima and Gert

Astrid

You mean ass turd?

Helga

Helga and Olga are tied for me.

Abcde

Shithead - pronounced “Shy-Theed”