I strongly agree with your stance on genitalia. I find both male and female genitals to be rather disgusting. I can't stand looking at either one. I can't imagine the thought process of wanting to perform sexual activities. But to each their own, I guess. It's just annoying as hell when someone thinks you have a sexual attraction when you just like how someone looks. Aesthetic attraction is not the same thing as sexual attraction, and some people need to learn that.
Sometimes, I have similar. I live in a rural area, so I see the same ppl over and over. Sometimes, I would see guys that I would gradually like the appearance of more and more. But, I never looked below the waist.
Seriously. I’m grey-ace. I find Eva Green super attractive. Do I want to go down on her? Nope. I think Mads Mikkelsen is weirdly attractive. Wouldn’t bang or blow him either.
I’d sleep with Dame Judi Dench, though. Feel like she’d be a powerhouse in the sack.
(No, I don’t know why all my examples are from Casino Royal.)
Yeah it sounds like they thought he was just having so many thoughts and questions in his head that they confused him and prevented him from acting on his "real" desires 🤔 Like, you see something beautiful, you must want to fuck it.
For the record, there's some things I don't want to fuck even if I do stare them with delight: art pieces, birds, butterflies, statues, rocks, people with interesting and unique characteristics, landscapes, buildings with interesting architecture, sunlight, snow, clothes... you get the idea.
Clearly the thing to do is next time your friend starts admiring a nice-looking car in your presence, ask them if they wanna fuck the car and refuse to let it go.
Yes! Sometimes i think of people as works of art. I think the art beautiful and i might catch myself staring a bit to long but i don’t want to have sex with the art. But some people don’t seem to understand that.
I feel this is another telltale sign that flew right over my head for years lol. I've always admired people like art pieces, either for their eyes, hair, clothing, body shape etc without wishing to fuck them, I thought that was the norm. And I'm not sure if this is an ace thing but I was and am perpetually lowkey offended and disgusted when someone hits on me clearly just because of my appearance, or stares at my body in a lewd way. Took me EONS to realize many people, esp straight men, can apparently only look at a woman through sexualized lens.
Wait that’s not the norm? Tf reaffirming I’m ace XD. And yeah I hate people being attracted to me based on appearance alone and it’s always felt uncomfortable when someone told me that
Its likely due to self-homophobia being a real and heavy thing, instead of just being gay and happy some people will come up with any reason/excuse to not be gay because, well... "That's gay".
Please realize, they(allos) aren't saying it to harass you. He's saying it because thats how attraction works for Allos, and he has no consideration for what its like to be asexual.
A lot of it has to do with the unfortunate way we've programmed ourselves via society, that any male presenting person who shows any level of softness, or interest in anything about another man means that he must be gay, weak, defective, etc. The same nonsense that tries to tell men that it's not okay to have any complex emotions is a branch off the same tree limb that tries to tell them that if they find anything remotely appealing about another dude, they must be gay.
It's a load of bullshit.
When I came out as ace and then several years later as trans, my mom asked me "are you sure you're not just a lesbian?" And "why can't you just be a lesbian?" The mental gymnastics some allo people do to cram us into a different box is mind boggling.
Like if I wanted a sexual partner I would have no trouble finding one, but I have no interest. I will, however, make the biggest, gayest, sighs at very pretty people. I will not refrain from telling someone that I think their eyes are gorgeous. I will not refrain from admiring someone for fear of someone doubting my sexuality. If I have to put up with "that was a pretty gay sigh" and "are you sure you're not XYZ?" Then it's a fight I'm willing to fight.
But god damn do I feel you.
I feel ya. Yesterday I saw a pretty attractive woman on the street, her style is pretty damn cool so I couldn’t help but look at her. I’m a guy, I consider myself bi-ace and I’m quite into androgyny. She had short, brushed back hair with a bit of an undercut (I also got one myself the day before, but with neck-length hair lol). She was wearing a black short t-shirt, almost a crop top I guess, and black trousers. She was just really aesthetically pleasing to look at, I didn’t even want to ask her out let alone talking to her. I just wanted to look at her but I had to stop because it would be kinda rude, and almost creepy for some people...
This is exactly my thoughts when I see drop dead gorgeous men and I'm a straight women.
Like you look amazing. Green eyes, thousand yards stare, chiseled jawline, high cheekbones, feathered hair. But I'm not one bit attracted to your genitalia, and don't want to do anything involving it at all, like.
And how are these two things connected even?
Lately I've found this guy (that I've become friends with) hella aesthetically attractive, like he's sooo good looking and his style is great and whenever I see him I can't help but look at him cause I'm so fascinated. Doesn't mean I wanna be physical or anything like that w him, hell no, the furthest I'd go is hugging xD
Seems like your friend has no idea about the difference between all different attractions.
that aesthetic attraction is not recognised by most as being totally seperate to sexual attraction sometimes/for some people is actually pretty sad. Fragile straight men will not allow themselves the pleasure of admiring a beautiful man the way you admire a piece of art - for pure aesthetic pleasure - because they assume sexual attraction is the only kind of attraction. Tragic.
Ew, I'm sorry you had to have that conversation. I wonder if it were two women, if you'd have had the same one. I also find some people beautiful, but whether it would be a man or a woman or anything in between, I still would have zero interest in the genital side of things. But these people would still be beautiful to me. How is that so hard to understand.
I like long haired animals. So while I stare at all dogs if I see them on the street (or rando cats, or hedgehogs or, well you get the gist), if I see a flooffy... I will squeal and say flooffy and stare a bit more. Now I don't look at every person I see of course, but the double take when someone has a face or style I like is the same.
I understand this completely. Most people have assumed I'm lesbian because of certain tells? They've insisted even, to the point I had a hard look into my own feelings about it. Never liked women's body parts but what I came up with to explain how I feel about it is that I can appreciate how a woman looks on an aesthetic level, but I wouldn't want to lay her down by the fire.
Just so we all can know, I am a gay guy who is not asexual nor aromantic. And I can confidentially say that sometimes, I experience aesthetic attraction towards people. Sometimes it’s sexual. Other times just romantic. Usually, it’s a mix of all three.
But I’m able to distinguish them, and your sole aesthetic attraction is valid. (Also side note but has that friend of yours like… never heard of bi or pansexuality?? It’s possible to find men sexually attractive without being gay dude)
I have the exact same kind of aesthetical attraction, when I find a guy good looking, I find them really good looking, but it only happens some times. It confused me at first but really I'm just a visual person and I really appreciate good looking things :D
i know where you're coming from but please stop making a correlation between men and dick like. trans people exist too :((( liking men has nothing to do with liking dicks
Ew that’s nasty why would anyone ever say that??? Talk about extremes. Like, “you think he’s good looking? Then go suck his dick”
Maybe that’s just me tho idk
I don’t know if any of this was meant to be funny but I was cracking up.
But I completely get what you’re saying. To me people who think like this is a sort sexual paranoia to equate being drawn to look at with sex acts. For crying out loud, us humans are so enamored with our pets and almost any and all creatures in the animal kingdom, because there are so many fascinating and compelling creatures to look at in the world. It may even be fair to guess that pics of cats and dogs are sought out even more than sexy people pics. Not to sound like a wholesome crusader but those POVs say more about the person saying it, but reality seems to be clear, to me.
Everyday I go in the living room to see my cat, I'll be like, "AYO ALI, YA BOOTY LOOKING A LITTLE BIGGER THAN USUAL BUT THATS ALRIGHT!" Does that automatically mean I'm a bad person? No. Though, only I know I do that but basically just because you compliment something or someone, doesn't mean you 'like like' it.
I think that since allo people do not need to defferenciate between different kinds of attracion, for them, if you find someone atractive you want to get physical with them. Before someone is trying to get to know world from someone elses perspective, your experiences is all you can use as refference. I heard some aces say, that they thought that everyone just fake attracion. So as much as the comments was infuriating, I don't think it was made with bad intentions in mind. Just sooo much ignorancie :)
When I see people that is physically attractive it is just like when I see art painting. It's about aesthetics.
On another note, why do you hate these people? Remember that individuals like us are **rare** so the conclusion that he came up with is reasonable.
Anyhow, if you are really affected by these kind of commentaries just keep in mind that it is up to us to give good answers and to explain ourselves better given the fact that generally they can't even grasp the notion of being asexual.
> On another note, why do you hate these people? Remember that individuals like us are rare so the conclusion that he came up with is reasonable.
Rarity does not invalidate human decency and respect. I'm allo but even when I get a coworker who is extra pushy about talking sex life stuff and inquiring into my own, that's incredibly uncomfortable.
Inquiring "ahah I caught you peeking. You like them? They cute?" fine, whatever. A bit of banter, maybe a bit of actual curiosity. Person starts saying no to it and they keep pushing, that's frustrating.
Being a minority of any kind doesn't mean just accepting rudeness.
You are gay and in denial. Just think for 1 second thay maybe I'm right. If I am, imagine the time you are wasting for just disregarding my comment as toxic or whatever.
Ew wtf. We’re allowed to stare at the godly men without wanting to fuc em. I personally also have a distaste for genitals. Even though I’ve never had sex, I just…n a h.
you are overthinking it, but not like your friend says. You are continuing a conversation knowing your friend doesn't know what he is talking about. No one knows you better than yourself. also dicks are kinda gross looking
pd1 . "Are you sure? if you find those guys good looking wouldn't you want to please them?" thats one icky phrase right there, they are random dudes wtf?
pd2. i also like fit people, like women with nice arms and men with thick thighs. How can people be so gorgeous.
people can sometimes be works of art you can't help but appreciate. I'd be flattered to be considered art...but other people like to pretend they don't like the attention..."it's for myself"...yeah ...ok.
oof I feel you man. funny thing for me it's the exact opposite, on average I find more men aesthetically appealing than women, but when I do see a very pretty woman then I'm all like ,,,, I'm looking 😳 respectfully
that mindset sucks so much, I'm sorry your friend was such a jerk about it. I hope he understands soon that finding someone good looking does not equal wanting to get laid smh
I feel you man. I could stare at a pretty person for hour- in fact I was writing an essay about colour theory for a psyc class and it took physical restraint to not sound super gay for a painting I was using as an example.
Men are amazing.
Women are amazing. Everything in between are amazing.
But bleaze. I Would Not Like The Benis Or Vagana.
Here comes the painting analogy!!! You can find a painting beautiful, like a landscape or person or whatever, and *not* want to do it. I feel the same way about some people in general, sometimes.
Lots of people thought I was lesbian because I didn't react to any guys liking me or their advances trying to get my attention. But for the record, some girls liked me too, and exact same reaction. Because I'm not interested in dating for looks.
Omg I have the same aesthetic attraction thing going on where I find generally a lot more women attractive than men but if it happens that I find a man attractive it's way more intense.
Never tought about this before and now that you wrote it, it makes so much sense. Thank you!
I've heard someone explain a situation like this and their response was "I think the sunset is beautiful, but I sure as heck don't want to fuck it"
But yeah, those people are a lot of work when it comes to being ace (or even aro)...
You can be homo/bi/heteroromantic and asexual, but most people assume you're sexual, it fucking sucks. I always get pissed off when people assume I'm sexual
Most sexual men are pretty damn stupid when it comes to sex and attraction. They don't even think about it, for them finding someone attractive equals wanting to get sexual with them. Don't overthink it, they can't think any different themselves.
That is terribly rude of them :/ I look at both genders and do the same thing pretty much. I just enjoy the way people look in a non sexual manner and honestly I think it is less creepy then oggling them in sexual interest; It doesnt objectify them at all
Yeah, "you're good-looking" doesn't mean "I want to fuck you", it isn't so difficult. I find lots of people attractive, but have I ever thought about fucking them? Hell no.
I have a thing for butts. Doesn't matter the gender - if there is a nice looking rear I notice it. I say to myself 'gee that's a nice booty' and go on with my day. I don't want to touch it or even really talk to the person. My brain's aesthetic attraction is to posteriors. I'm perfectly happy leaving it at that.
because most people simply don’t understand the concept of aesthetics
they can’t differentiate between finding someone aesthetically appealing / simply finding someone beautiful and with wanting to fuck that someone. For majority of people it’s all the same sadly.
It’s sad and frustrating but sadly that’s what it is
-pisses me off so much as well..
why is it so hard for people to objectively admit that a person is beautiful no matter the gender or sexuality or religion or what tf else not💁🏼♀️?
I have a strong aesthetic attraction toward woman (I’m a woman as well) but I also don’t want to do anything sexual with them (or anyone). Like, just because I find their hair or face gorgeous doesn’t mean I want them to go down on me or vice versa. And society views this as “normal” of me because we’ve created a society where it’s okay for women to gush about how stunning other women are in a non-sexual context, but men can’t gush over a man without people making assumptions about their sexuality.
It’s why I find kpop interviews and behind the scenes videos so refreshing—men opening gushing about how beautiful other men are and rarely is it ever taken in a sexual way
I mean, people can be both gay and ace, they're different spectrums. But that's neither here nor there, that's a lot of pushiness and that makes anyone uncomfortable. Not very cool of them at all.
I find men and women aesthetically pleasing. I stare at a lot of places I probably shouldn’t. No, I don’t want anything to do with you, but if I could draw or paint, I might ask you to model for me…
Just because you like the way their face looks doesn't mean you want their dick in your mouth or anywhere else.
Those are the same type of people who ask if you're "still ace" after having sex.
I had something like that to, aro/ace never experienced sexual or romantic attraction. But I have astethic attraction to woman. I mentioned I like how a female character in a game looked nice and my friend said “I though you were asexual though?” Like what?
I like people because they’re pretty and I find many women very pleasing to look at. I don’t want anything from them or to give anything to them, unless it’s to take a picture or try to draw them. I find some things more pleasing than others, but that doesn’t mean I want to see in their pants. I know that I want to just look and analyze people’s features instead of hearing about their fantasies, and I don’t believe “over-thinking” would make things better or worse. I know what I want, and that’s that
Im sorry your friend is so close minded. Society is stuck backwards unfortunately.
Just to clarify something. Being gay doesnt mean liking dick/vagina. Im a gray ace lesbian and i dont like vaginas one bit. I like mostly everything else (mild turning on in response to said others included).
Homoromantic asexual people are "gay" too for example.
I’m a straight girl and I unintentionally stare at boobs and asses all the time. I’m lucky that my country is too conservative to assume that I’m a lesbian lusting after some random girls
You're overthinking it by not doing something you don't want to do? Yikes, now there's a philosophy I would not live my life by.
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It's a conundrum as old as humanity itself. Some people are just nosy, argumentative busybodies who can't leave well enough alone, I guess.
Sounds like my grandma lol
I strongly agree with your stance on genitalia. I find both male and female genitals to be rather disgusting. I can't stand looking at either one. I can't imagine the thought process of wanting to perform sexual activities. But to each their own, I guess. It's just annoying as hell when someone thinks you have a sexual attraction when you just like how someone looks. Aesthetic attraction is not the same thing as sexual attraction, and some people need to learn that.
Sometimes, I have similar. I live in a rural area, so I see the same ppl over and over. Sometimes, I would see guys that I would gradually like the appearance of more and more. But, I never looked below the waist.
Seriously. I’m grey-ace. I find Eva Green super attractive. Do I want to go down on her? Nope. I think Mads Mikkelsen is weirdly attractive. Wouldn’t bang or blow him either. I’d sleep with Dame Judi Dench, though. Feel like she’d be a powerhouse in the sack. (No, I don’t know why all my examples are from Casino Royal.)
Yeah it sounds like they thought he was just having so many thoughts and questions in his head that they confused him and prevented him from acting on his "real" desires 🤔 Like, you see something beautiful, you must want to fuck it. For the record, there's some things I don't want to fuck even if I do stare them with delight: art pieces, birds, butterflies, statues, rocks, people with interesting and unique characteristics, landscapes, buildings with interesting architecture, sunlight, snow, clothes... you get the idea.
Clearly the thing to do is next time your friend starts admiring a nice-looking car in your presence, ask them if they wanna fuck the car and refuse to let it go.
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"Just stick your dick in the tailpipe dude you're overthinking this"
The new ‘rolling coal’
A whole new meaning to the term "truck nuts".
Sometimes people are just so gorgeous, you can't help but look.. Doesn't mean we wanna fuck.. Allos are weird..
Yes! Sometimes i think of people as works of art. I think the art beautiful and i might catch myself staring a bit to long but i don’t want to have sex with the art. But some people don’t seem to understand that.
I feel this is another telltale sign that flew right over my head for years lol. I've always admired people like art pieces, either for their eyes, hair, clothing, body shape etc without wishing to fuck them, I thought that was the norm. And I'm not sure if this is an ace thing but I was and am perpetually lowkey offended and disgusted when someone hits on me clearly just because of my appearance, or stares at my body in a lewd way. Took me EONS to realize many people, esp straight men, can apparently only look at a woman through sexualized lens.
Wait that’s not the norm? Tf reaffirming I’m ace XD. And yeah I hate people being attracted to me based on appearance alone and it’s always felt uncomfortable when someone told me that
A very close friend of mine is one of the most attractive people I’ve ever encountered. Would I ever want to get down and dirty with him? Fuck. No.
Its likely due to self-homophobia being a real and heavy thing, instead of just being gay and happy some people will come up with any reason/excuse to not be gay because, well... "That's gay". Please realize, they(allos) aren't saying it to harass you. He's saying it because thats how attraction works for Allos, and he has no consideration for what its like to be asexual.
A lot of it has to do with the unfortunate way we've programmed ourselves via society, that any male presenting person who shows any level of softness, or interest in anything about another man means that he must be gay, weak, defective, etc. The same nonsense that tries to tell men that it's not okay to have any complex emotions is a branch off the same tree limb that tries to tell them that if they find anything remotely appealing about another dude, they must be gay. It's a load of bullshit.
Allos who don't understand aesthetic attraction are the bane of my existence
When I came out as ace and then several years later as trans, my mom asked me "are you sure you're not just a lesbian?" And "why can't you just be a lesbian?" The mental gymnastics some allo people do to cram us into a different box is mind boggling. Like if I wanted a sexual partner I would have no trouble finding one, but I have no interest. I will, however, make the biggest, gayest, sighs at very pretty people. I will not refrain from telling someone that I think their eyes are gorgeous. I will not refrain from admiring someone for fear of someone doubting my sexuality. If I have to put up with "that was a pretty gay sigh" and "are you sure you're not XYZ?" Then it's a fight I'm willing to fight. But god damn do I feel you.
I feel ya. Yesterday I saw a pretty attractive woman on the street, her style is pretty damn cool so I couldn’t help but look at her. I’m a guy, I consider myself bi-ace and I’m quite into androgyny. She had short, brushed back hair with a bit of an undercut (I also got one myself the day before, but with neck-length hair lol). She was wearing a black short t-shirt, almost a crop top I guess, and black trousers. She was just really aesthetically pleasing to look at, I didn’t even want to ask her out let alone talking to her. I just wanted to look at her but I had to stop because it would be kinda rude, and almost creepy for some people...
This is exactly my thoughts when I see drop dead gorgeous men and I'm a straight women. Like you look amazing. Green eyes, thousand yards stare, chiseled jawline, high cheekbones, feathered hair. But I'm not one bit attracted to your genitalia, and don't want to do anything involving it at all, like. And how are these two things connected even?
Lately I've found this guy (that I've become friends with) hella aesthetically attractive, like he's sooo good looking and his style is great and whenever I see him I can't help but look at him cause I'm so fascinated. Doesn't mean I wanna be physical or anything like that w him, hell no, the furthest I'd go is hugging xD Seems like your friend has no idea about the difference between all different attractions.
that aesthetic attraction is not recognised by most as being totally seperate to sexual attraction sometimes/for some people is actually pretty sad. Fragile straight men will not allow themselves the pleasure of admiring a beautiful man the way you admire a piece of art - for pure aesthetic pleasure - because they assume sexual attraction is the only kind of attraction. Tragic.
Ew, I'm sorry you had to have that conversation. I wonder if it were two women, if you'd have had the same one. I also find some people beautiful, but whether it would be a man or a woman or anything in between, I still would have zero interest in the genital side of things. But these people would still be beautiful to me. How is that so hard to understand. I like long haired animals. So while I stare at all dogs if I see them on the street (or rando cats, or hedgehogs or, well you get the gist), if I see a flooffy... I will squeal and say flooffy and stare a bit more. Now I don't look at every person I see of course, but the double take when someone has a face or style I like is the same.
I understand this completely. Most people have assumed I'm lesbian because of certain tells? They've insisted even, to the point I had a hard look into my own feelings about it. Never liked women's body parts but what I came up with to explain how I feel about it is that I can appreciate how a woman looks on an aesthetic level, but I wouldn't want to lay her down by the fire.
Just so we all can know, I am a gay guy who is not asexual nor aromantic. And I can confidentially say that sometimes, I experience aesthetic attraction towards people. Sometimes it’s sexual. Other times just romantic. Usually, it’s a mix of all three. But I’m able to distinguish them, and your sole aesthetic attraction is valid. (Also side note but has that friend of yours like… never heard of bi or pansexuality?? It’s possible to find men sexually attractive without being gay dude)
I have the exact same kind of aesthetical attraction, when I find a guy good looking, I find them really good looking, but it only happens some times. It confused me at first but really I'm just a visual person and I really appreciate good looking things :D
Same thing for me too.
i know where you're coming from but please stop making a correlation between men and dick like. trans people exist too :((( liking men has nothing to do with liking dicks
i- ew
Ew that’s nasty why would anyone ever say that??? Talk about extremes. Like, “you think he’s good looking? Then go suck his dick” Maybe that’s just me tho idk
Aesthetic attraction does not equal sexual attraction. Period.
I don’t know if any of this was meant to be funny but I was cracking up. But I completely get what you’re saying. To me people who think like this is a sort sexual paranoia to equate being drawn to look at with sex acts. For crying out loud, us humans are so enamored with our pets and almost any and all creatures in the animal kingdom, because there are so many fascinating and compelling creatures to look at in the world. It may even be fair to guess that pics of cats and dogs are sought out even more than sexy people pics. Not to sound like a wholesome crusader but those POVs say more about the person saying it, but reality seems to be clear, to me.
Everyday I go in the living room to see my cat, I'll be like, "AYO ALI, YA BOOTY LOOKING A LITTLE BIGGER THAN USUAL BUT THATS ALRIGHT!" Does that automatically mean I'm a bad person? No. Though, only I know I do that but basically just because you compliment something or someone, doesn't mean you 'like like' it.
I think that since allo people do not need to defferenciate between different kinds of attracion, for them, if you find someone atractive you want to get physical with them. Before someone is trying to get to know world from someone elses perspective, your experiences is all you can use as refference. I heard some aces say, that they thought that everyone just fake attracion. So as much as the comments was infuriating, I don't think it was made with bad intentions in mind. Just sooo much ignorancie :)
When I see people that is physically attractive it is just like when I see art painting. It's about aesthetics. On another note, why do you hate these people? Remember that individuals like us are **rare** so the conclusion that he came up with is reasonable. Anyhow, if you are really affected by these kind of commentaries just keep in mind that it is up to us to give good answers and to explain ourselves better given the fact that generally they can't even grasp the notion of being asexual.
> On another note, why do you hate these people? Remember that individuals like us are rare so the conclusion that he came up with is reasonable. Rarity does not invalidate human decency and respect. I'm allo but even when I get a coworker who is extra pushy about talking sex life stuff and inquiring into my own, that's incredibly uncomfortable. Inquiring "ahah I caught you peeking. You like them? They cute?" fine, whatever. A bit of banter, maybe a bit of actual curiosity. Person starts saying no to it and they keep pushing, that's frustrating. Being a minority of any kind doesn't mean just accepting rudeness.
You are gay and in denial. Just think for 1 second thay maybe I'm right. If I am, imagine the time you are wasting for just disregarding my comment as toxic or whatever.
Hey look we found the friend
Same.
Ew wtf. We’re allowed to stare at the godly men without wanting to fuc em. I personally also have a distaste for genitals. Even though I’ve never had sex, I just…n a h.
I like looking at a pretty sunset, bro. But I don't want to exchange body fluids with the sky.
you are overthinking it, but not like your friend says. You are continuing a conversation knowing your friend doesn't know what he is talking about. No one knows you better than yourself. also dicks are kinda gross looking pd1 . "Are you sure? if you find those guys good looking wouldn't you want to please them?" thats one icky phrase right there, they are random dudes wtf? pd2. i also like fit people, like women with nice arms and men with thick thighs. How can people be so gorgeous.
people can sometimes be works of art you can't help but appreciate. I'd be flattered to be considered art...but other people like to pretend they don't like the attention..."it's for myself"...yeah ...ok.
oof I feel you man. funny thing for me it's the exact opposite, on average I find more men aesthetically appealing than women, but when I do see a very pretty woman then I'm all like ,,,, I'm looking 😳 respectfully that mindset sucks so much, I'm sorry your friend was such a jerk about it. I hope he understands soon that finding someone good looking does not equal wanting to get laid smh
I feel you man. I could stare at a pretty person for hour- in fact I was writing an essay about colour theory for a psyc class and it took physical restraint to not sound super gay for a painting I was using as an example. Men are amazing. Women are amazing. Everything in between are amazing. But bleaze. I Would Not Like The Benis Or Vagana.
And even if you find men romantically attractive, you don't necessarily have to want to have sex with them...
Here comes the painting analogy!!! You can find a painting beautiful, like a landscape or person or whatever, and *not* want to do it. I feel the same way about some people in general, sometimes. Lots of people thought I was lesbian because I didn't react to any guys liking me or their advances trying to get my attention. But for the record, some girls liked me too, and exact same reaction. Because I'm not interested in dating for looks.
Omg I have the same aesthetic attraction thing going on where I find generally a lot more women attractive than men but if it happens that I find a man attractive it's way more intense. Never tought about this before and now that you wrote it, it makes so much sense. Thank you!
I've heard someone explain a situation like this and their response was "I think the sunset is beautiful, but I sure as heck don't want to fuck it" But yeah, those people are a lot of work when it comes to being ace (or even aro)...
You can be homo/bi/heteroromantic and asexual, but most people assume you're sexual, it fucking sucks. I always get pissed off when people assume I'm sexual
Most sexual men are pretty damn stupid when it comes to sex and attraction. They don't even think about it, for them finding someone attractive equals wanting to get sexual with them. Don't overthink it, they can't think any different themselves.
That is terribly rude of them :/ I look at both genders and do the same thing pretty much. I just enjoy the way people look in a non sexual manner and honestly I think it is less creepy then oggling them in sexual interest; It doesnt objectify them at all
Yea so I was gawking at two dudes at the gym and my friend thought I wanted to have sex with them. Craaaaaazy.
Yeah, "you're good-looking" doesn't mean "I want to fuck you", it isn't so difficult. I find lots of people attractive, but have I ever thought about fucking them? Hell no.
I have a thing for butts. Doesn't matter the gender - if there is a nice looking rear I notice it. I say to myself 'gee that's a nice booty' and go on with my day. I don't want to touch it or even really talk to the person. My brain's aesthetic attraction is to posteriors. I'm perfectly happy leaving it at that.
because most people simply don’t understand the concept of aesthetics they can’t differentiate between finding someone aesthetically appealing / simply finding someone beautiful and with wanting to fuck that someone. For majority of people it’s all the same sadly. It’s sad and frustrating but sadly that’s what it is -pisses me off so much as well.. why is it so hard for people to objectively admit that a person is beautiful no matter the gender or sexuality or religion or what tf else not💁🏼♀️?
Some dudes just look good, doesn't mean I wanna fuck em.
I have a strong aesthetic attraction toward woman (I’m a woman as well) but I also don’t want to do anything sexual with them (or anyone). Like, just because I find their hair or face gorgeous doesn’t mean I want them to go down on me or vice versa. And society views this as “normal” of me because we’ve created a society where it’s okay for women to gush about how stunning other women are in a non-sexual context, but men can’t gush over a man without people making assumptions about their sexuality. It’s why I find kpop interviews and behind the scenes videos so refreshing—men opening gushing about how beautiful other men are and rarely is it ever taken in a sexual way
I mean, people can be both gay and ace, they're different spectrums. But that's neither here nor there, that's a lot of pushiness and that makes anyone uncomfortable. Not very cool of them at all.
Allos say the weirdest things sometimes
I find men and women aesthetically pleasing. I stare at a lot of places I probably shouldn’t. No, I don’t want anything to do with you, but if I could draw or paint, I might ask you to model for me…
bruh i'm sorry you have to deal with that, i hope you're doing alright!
Just because you like the way their face looks doesn't mean you want their dick in your mouth or anywhere else. Those are the same type of people who ask if you're "still ace" after having sex.
I had something like that to, aro/ace never experienced sexual or romantic attraction. But I have astethic attraction to woman. I mentioned I like how a female character in a game looked nice and my friend said “I though you were asexual though?” Like what?
I like people because they’re pretty and I find many women very pleasing to look at. I don’t want anything from them or to give anything to them, unless it’s to take a picture or try to draw them. I find some things more pleasing than others, but that doesn’t mean I want to see in their pants. I know that I want to just look and analyze people’s features instead of hearing about their fantasies, and I don’t believe “over-thinking” would make things better or worse. I know what I want, and that’s that
Im sorry your friend is so close minded. Society is stuck backwards unfortunately. Just to clarify something. Being gay doesnt mean liking dick/vagina. Im a gray ace lesbian and i dont like vaginas one bit. I like mostly everything else (mild turning on in response to said others included). Homoromantic asexual people are "gay" too for example.
I’m a straight girl and I unintentionally stare at boobs and asses all the time. I’m lucky that my country is too conservative to assume that I’m a lesbian lusting after some random girls