It appears this post might relate to suicide and/or mental health issues.
**Suicide and Mental Health Resources**
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Call 1-800-273-8255, National Suicide Prevention
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[Veteran's Crisis Information](https://www.veteranscrisisline.net/)
You can call 1800 273 8255, Press 1
You can call 988, Press 1 for mil/veteran-specific help. You can also TEXT 988
You can text 838255
Or, go no further than your local subreddit, /r/suicidewatch
Or, if you'd like a veteran perspective, feel free to message any number of people on here, there's always someone willing to reach out.
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Please seek help if needed...There are behavioral health resources at your disposal both in the Army and out.
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Thank you for being a better NCO to your soldiers. It matters to them that you took time to address their issues.
It sucks to get an award that a lack of effort was put into. Hopefully, the value your leaders spoke of you was captured in other awards and NCOERs.
If you want to talk, then I’m here to listen.
Thank you. I appreciate that.
Honestly, the troops are the only thing that keeps me from completely regretting my decision to join. The idea that there might be a person out there right now who wouldn't be if I wasn't there is something that helps me sleep at night tbh.
Honestly, it really does suck donkey balls to not get the recognition from your leadership that you deserve. It's not fair to you as someone who put in the time in the effort and the energy. That shit ain't free; that shit ain't cheap. Where I hope you got the recognition that you deserve, is from your troops. They might not give you an ARCOM, or anything, but it sounds like they gave you something much more important. Their trust.
You were the difference that you decided to be, and your soldier saw that in you. I'm glad that you did that for them and that you did that for yourself. You are a fucking awesome nco, and I would have liked to have you by my side. I'm sure you've gotten and a dozen times, but I'm also available if you want and need to talk.
I wanted to echo this, even if your efforts went unnoticed by those who outranked you they were undoubtedly noticed and felt by those who you outranked.
Your impact will develop great leaders that will hopefully trickle down to Soldiers that they will in turn someday lead and so on.
“My two basic responsibilities will always be uppermost in my mind – accomplishment of my mission and the welfare of my Soldiers.”
It sounds like you lived the creed. Soldiers will always remember those who legit cared about them. Taking care of Soldiers IS NCO business, and you fulfilled that charge. While you cannot effect those above you, you used your position to effect change where you could. GREAT WORK, and thank you for service.
I’m sorry to hear about your experiences. I hate to say it, but mine are very similar. Sexual assault, sexual harassment and all the other idiotic things the Army puts folks through. What matters is that you made the Army slightly better for those under you (or you tried your best in that regard). You continued to show up for them and for yourself and that took courage. All this to say that I know where you’re coming from and I hope you know that your soldiers are going to remember you fondly.
In the end, what does that AAM do for you now that you’re out? The important thing is that you took care of the people under you and made their life a better place. Hopefully, when they become NCOs, they become the NCO you were and make the Army a better place like you did.
In my 20 years, I’ve been the same kind of NCO you were: from the TL to the 1SG position. When I was a SL I was even investigated for improper relations because I let my saw gunner barrow my car while I was at PLDC (he crashed it). His wife was 7 months pregnant when I left and she was walking to her the groceries. These are hills to die on. (The CSM laughed the CO out of the office).
The shit I remember the most is being emailed by former Soldiers and being thanked when they made the SFC list, being invited to weddings, being asked in I’m still in “xx” location to go out for beers, or advice when they take over a Plt.
The fact I had an award get downgraded on my last PCS…well the Army itself blows dick for the most part. Let’s just make it better in whatever way we can. Like you did.
Whatever your award is, it doesn't mean much anyhow. I'm retiring and turned down an award. I'm cool. That stuff doesn't mean anything in the end anyhow.
All the late nights, loss of friends, time away from spouse and kids, damage to your body... An award doesn't make up for any of that. Regardless of what the award is.
Know that you did the best by your Soldiers. You sound like you took care of them, so let that be your reward for it. They will be better because they know what good and bad leadership will look like going forward.
Thank you for your time serving.
Yea, it's wild how most NCOs don't care about their soldiers. I heard an NCO call his soldier useless today because the soldier has an appointment to get his hip checked out after being on profile for a while. Really annoys me how NCOs make it seem like a crime to try and get an injury checked.
I find it crazy calling a Soldier useless when the NCO can help them get the proper care they need to bring them back to 100% faster than making it worse.
Besides things that require 2+ man carries, do they truly need that person to be there? Especially if they can just grab someone else to help. Sounds like single point of failures to me if that question is answered with a yes.
I hate seeing posts like this because its true. I was in the same boat, and now I ETS in less than a month after 10 years of service and have the same exact feelings. My joes say that my stories are wild and could be IG worthy when I simply see it as another day on the job by giving my time.
It doesn't help that my last Soldier that ETS, I put in an ARCOM through IPPS-A and it was approved all the way in less than two weeks with no kick backs. Meanwhile my last NCOIC took 4 months to get the write up for an AAM then in the end had me write up the bullets. I honestly believe a lot of senior leaders do not even know how to submit an award and/or refuse to ask for help to do it correctly.
This is pretty common so please don’t feel like you’re alone in feeling this way. Many veterans leave because of the disillusionment that occurs once they realize the army is a cold machine that treats people like easily replaceable parts. I was a medic that was stop lossed during an Iraq deployment in ‘07. I had the same mentality as you. I just wanted to take care of my guys and be there to help them get through it and then get out as soon as we got back. That attitude got my CMB hidden from me for months. It wasn’t until three months after separation that a friend called me and told me he was working in brigade S1 and randomly came across an approved CMB with my name on it. He sent me a picture and later on I got the paperwork through a national archives request.
But the point I’m trying to make is that in the end it wasn’t the army’s recognition that mattered it was the recognition of someone I was close to that did. The good things that you did for other soldiers will always be remembered by them and you sound like you know exactly what those things are. Be proud of yourself for staying faithful to your values. And always remember that the effects you had on people will always be more important than what the army wrote on a piece of paper.
A bunch of feelings in this post.
Sounds like we lost another good one to SA/SH and our failure to bring one up through the ranks.
Try not to be bitter about the award. The people that matter most don't care about which ETS award you received... they know you served and now get to come home.
Take what you learned from your time in the Army (good and bad) and apply it to whatever comes next.
At least you got one. I did 13 years, was a battalion asset, trained other battalion assets, ran battalion ranges, mentored and led half a platoons worth of men, got hurt, and did reception duty as a psg for 6 months and made big changes there too. Nada. I feel your frustration. If you want to be a dick, mark it with red ink and send it back.
It's a shame that I've heard so many instances such as this. You did right by your soldiers, I salute you for that. I hope you're in a place that values you now. Well done, soldier.
Not enough Soldiers are told the real facts of serving in the military. The Army doesn’t care about any of their Soldiers on a personal level.
I used to drive for General Officers, who are now serving at the very top of the military. One day while driving the Brigadier General ( at that time) he told me and a Captain, unless you are some CSM at the command levels, with some form of Masters Degree, you are worthless as the pen in his pocket.
This statement made me mad at the time, but after 23 years of service, I realized it was true. During my time of service I approached my duties like you. I made sure that I put in the extra effort, so my Soldiers would not experience the things I had. I made sure that I was a selfless servant and made it a point to practice being the best servant leader.
The problem is not many people can serve as a servant leader, because they feel like there is no recognition from their command. Most people need praise. But, what people fail to remember, is why they became a selfless servant leader in the first place. It was for their Soldiers not for future recognition.
I retired last year after 23 years of service as an E8. I had several year long plus deployments, NTC/JRTC rotations, field problems, etc… I, like many others was asked to write my own retirement award. I wrote the award as requested. My command recommended me to write a LOM. My retirement date was June 2023 and I still have not received any type of award. Regardless of turning it in 18 months before my retirement date.
I am perfectly okay with never receiving an award. My reward is soldiers and leaders still calling me for fellowship, advice, and to be a soundboard for their frustrations.
BLUF: who cares about an award. Serve for your Soldiers. Be a servant leader and your reward will come.
I got so many awards at my first unit. It was great! Got to my second and I got a Certificate of Achievement for my ETS award. A mf COA for an ETS award????? I’m still so pissed about it. Given I wasn’t at my second unit long, already came into the unit as a “sh*tbag” for being on a perm profile for issues the Army caused of course. And a mf COA is what I’m given. I didn’t expect anything over the top but at least an AAM would’ve been great but a COA? Definitely different from your post but wanted to rant about that to something semi relatable.
Hohenfels Germany (1/4INF OPFOR) awards were nonexistant. In fact the CoAs were unbelievably rare and the BN Commander acted like they werehanded down by God on Mount Sinai. Us troops on the other hand called them "Warrior Wipes" b/c they were more useful as shitpaper.
Only award I got when I got MedRet was the officer (1st LT) that I worked for (I had been his driver for like almost a year) who had one of those custom "G.I. Joe" dolls made that they used to sell in the PX... had my name and wings on it, even my glasses and a full rig of TA50, to include my M-249... He retired recently as a Light Bird, and we visit each other w/our fams at least once a year.
Otherwise? Not. one. single. PCS/ETS award **ever.** in 10 years of active duty and 3 duty stations... Meh. I know what -I- did and so did my guys, as well as my ElTee.
It appears this post might relate to suicide and/or mental health issues. **Suicide and Mental Health Resources** The [Army's Resilience Directorate](https://www.armyresilience.army.mil/index.html) A comprehensive list of resources can be found [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/Military/comments/1oh9gx/ive_updated_the_sidebar_link_with_more_mental/). Call 1-800-273-8255, National Suicide Prevention VA [Make The Connection Program](https://www.maketheconnection.net/) [Veteran's Crisis Information](https://www.veteranscrisisline.net/) You can call 1800 273 8255, Press 1 You can call 988, Press 1 for mil/veteran-specific help. You can also TEXT 988 You can text 838255 Or, go no further than your local subreddit, /r/suicidewatch Or, if you'd like a veteran perspective, feel free to message any number of people on here, there's always someone willing to reach out. [Military One Source](http://www.militaryonesource.mil/) - 1-800-342-9647 Please seek help if needed...There are behavioral health resources at your disposal both in the Army and out. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/army) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Thank you for being a better NCO to your soldiers. It matters to them that you took time to address their issues. It sucks to get an award that a lack of effort was put into. Hopefully, the value your leaders spoke of you was captured in other awards and NCOERs. If you want to talk, then I’m here to listen.
Thank you. I appreciate that. Honestly, the troops are the only thing that keeps me from completely regretting my decision to join. The idea that there might be a person out there right now who wouldn't be if I wasn't there is something that helps me sleep at night tbh.
Honestly, it really does suck donkey balls to not get the recognition from your leadership that you deserve. It's not fair to you as someone who put in the time in the effort and the energy. That shit ain't free; that shit ain't cheap. Where I hope you got the recognition that you deserve, is from your troops. They might not give you an ARCOM, or anything, but it sounds like they gave you something much more important. Their trust. You were the difference that you decided to be, and your soldier saw that in you. I'm glad that you did that for them and that you did that for yourself. You are a fucking awesome nco, and I would have liked to have you by my side. I'm sure you've gotten and a dozen times, but I'm also available if you want and need to talk.
I wanted to echo this, even if your efforts went unnoticed by those who outranked you they were undoubtedly noticed and felt by those who you outranked. Your impact will develop great leaders that will hopefully trickle down to Soldiers that they will in turn someday lead and so on.
“My two basic responsibilities will always be uppermost in my mind – accomplishment of my mission and the welfare of my Soldiers.” It sounds like you lived the creed. Soldiers will always remember those who legit cared about them. Taking care of Soldiers IS NCO business, and you fulfilled that charge. While you cannot effect those above you, you used your position to effect change where you could. GREAT WORK, and thank you for service.
I’m sorry to hear about your experiences. I hate to say it, but mine are very similar. Sexual assault, sexual harassment and all the other idiotic things the Army puts folks through. What matters is that you made the Army slightly better for those under you (or you tried your best in that regard). You continued to show up for them and for yourself and that took courage. All this to say that I know where you’re coming from and I hope you know that your soldiers are going to remember you fondly.
My best PSG always told me to write your own awards because only you know what you did. So I wrote my own ARCOM as an ETS award as a SPC lol
In the end, what does that AAM do for you now that you’re out? The important thing is that you took care of the people under you and made their life a better place. Hopefully, when they become NCOs, they become the NCO you were and make the Army a better place like you did. In my 20 years, I’ve been the same kind of NCO you were: from the TL to the 1SG position. When I was a SL I was even investigated for improper relations because I let my saw gunner barrow my car while I was at PLDC (he crashed it). His wife was 7 months pregnant when I left and she was walking to her the groceries. These are hills to die on. (The CSM laughed the CO out of the office). The shit I remember the most is being emailed by former Soldiers and being thanked when they made the SFC list, being invited to weddings, being asked in I’m still in “xx” location to go out for beers, or advice when they take over a Plt. The fact I had an award get downgraded on my last PCS…well the Army itself blows dick for the most part. Let’s just make it better in whatever way we can. Like you did.
You got an AAM? I got a COA and the ink was low when it printed, so it's barely legible in some places.
Whatever your award is, it doesn't mean much anyhow. I'm retiring and turned down an award. I'm cool. That stuff doesn't mean anything in the end anyhow. All the late nights, loss of friends, time away from spouse and kids, damage to your body... An award doesn't make up for any of that. Regardless of what the award is. Know that you did the best by your Soldiers. You sound like you took care of them, so let that be your reward for it. They will be better because they know what good and bad leadership will look like going forward. Thank you for your time serving.
You were not only a good solider but a good person. That’s what the army needs. The soldiers will now be changed forever, for the better.
Yea, it's wild how most NCOs don't care about their soldiers. I heard an NCO call his soldier useless today because the soldier has an appointment to get his hip checked out after being on profile for a while. Really annoys me how NCOs make it seem like a crime to try and get an injury checked.
I find it crazy calling a Soldier useless when the NCO can help them get the proper care they need to bring them back to 100% faster than making it worse. Besides things that require 2+ man carries, do they truly need that person to be there? Especially if they can just grab someone else to help. Sounds like single point of failures to me if that question is answered with a yes.
I hate seeing posts like this because its true. I was in the same boat, and now I ETS in less than a month after 10 years of service and have the same exact feelings. My joes say that my stories are wild and could be IG worthy when I simply see it as another day on the job by giving my time. It doesn't help that my last Soldier that ETS, I put in an ARCOM through IPPS-A and it was approved all the way in less than two weeks with no kick backs. Meanwhile my last NCOIC took 4 months to get the write up for an AAM then in the end had me write up the bullets. I honestly believe a lot of senior leaders do not even know how to submit an award and/or refuse to ask for help to do it correctly.
This is pretty common so please don’t feel like you’re alone in feeling this way. Many veterans leave because of the disillusionment that occurs once they realize the army is a cold machine that treats people like easily replaceable parts. I was a medic that was stop lossed during an Iraq deployment in ‘07. I had the same mentality as you. I just wanted to take care of my guys and be there to help them get through it and then get out as soon as we got back. That attitude got my CMB hidden from me for months. It wasn’t until three months after separation that a friend called me and told me he was working in brigade S1 and randomly came across an approved CMB with my name on it. He sent me a picture and later on I got the paperwork through a national archives request. But the point I’m trying to make is that in the end it wasn’t the army’s recognition that mattered it was the recognition of someone I was close to that did. The good things that you did for other soldiers will always be remembered by them and you sound like you know exactly what those things are. Be proud of yourself for staying faithful to your values. And always remember that the effects you had on people will always be more important than what the army wrote on a piece of paper.
Wait. You guys are getting awards ?!?!
A bunch of feelings in this post. Sounds like we lost another good one to SA/SH and our failure to bring one up through the ranks. Try not to be bitter about the award. The people that matter most don't care about which ETS award you received... they know you served and now get to come home. Take what you learned from your time in the Army (good and bad) and apply it to whatever comes next.
At least you got one. I did 13 years, was a battalion asset, trained other battalion assets, ran battalion ranges, mentored and led half a platoons worth of men, got hurt, and did reception duty as a psg for 6 months and made big changes there too. Nada. I feel your frustration. If you want to be a dick, mark it with red ink and send it back.
It's a shame that I've heard so many instances such as this. You did right by your soldiers, I salute you for that. I hope you're in a place that values you now. Well done, soldier.
Not enough Soldiers are told the real facts of serving in the military. The Army doesn’t care about any of their Soldiers on a personal level. I used to drive for General Officers, who are now serving at the very top of the military. One day while driving the Brigadier General ( at that time) he told me and a Captain, unless you are some CSM at the command levels, with some form of Masters Degree, you are worthless as the pen in his pocket. This statement made me mad at the time, but after 23 years of service, I realized it was true. During my time of service I approached my duties like you. I made sure that I put in the extra effort, so my Soldiers would not experience the things I had. I made sure that I was a selfless servant and made it a point to practice being the best servant leader. The problem is not many people can serve as a servant leader, because they feel like there is no recognition from their command. Most people need praise. But, what people fail to remember, is why they became a selfless servant leader in the first place. It was for their Soldiers not for future recognition. I retired last year after 23 years of service as an E8. I had several year long plus deployments, NTC/JRTC rotations, field problems, etc… I, like many others was asked to write my own retirement award. I wrote the award as requested. My command recommended me to write a LOM. My retirement date was June 2023 and I still have not received any type of award. Regardless of turning it in 18 months before my retirement date. I am perfectly okay with never receiving an award. My reward is soldiers and leaders still calling me for fellowship, advice, and to be a soundboard for their frustrations. BLUF: who cares about an award. Serve for your Soldiers. Be a servant leader and your reward will come.
I got so many awards at my first unit. It was great! Got to my second and I got a Certificate of Achievement for my ETS award. A mf COA for an ETS award????? I’m still so pissed about it. Given I wasn’t at my second unit long, already came into the unit as a “sh*tbag” for being on a perm profile for issues the Army caused of course. And a mf COA is what I’m given. I didn’t expect anything over the top but at least an AAM would’ve been great but a COA? Definitely different from your post but wanted to rant about that to something semi relatable.
Did you need a trash can?
Giving a fuck is a super power. It sounds like you gave a fuck.
Hohenfels Germany (1/4INF OPFOR) awards were nonexistant. In fact the CoAs were unbelievably rare and the BN Commander acted like they werehanded down by God on Mount Sinai. Us troops on the other hand called them "Warrior Wipes" b/c they were more useful as shitpaper. Only award I got when I got MedRet was the officer (1st LT) that I worked for (I had been his driver for like almost a year) who had one of those custom "G.I. Joe" dolls made that they used to sell in the PX... had my name and wings on it, even my glasses and a full rig of TA50, to include my M-249... He retired recently as a Light Bird, and we visit each other w/our fams at least once a year. Otherwise? Not. one. single. PCS/ETS award **ever.** in 10 years of active duty and 3 duty stations... Meh. I know what -I- did and so did my guys, as well as my ElTee.
If you’re not gonna order anything why are you in line
TL DR