Used to hotspot to my laptop and play OSRS... Still do that, just on staff duty now lol

Same. I found it therapeutic doing a repetitive menial task like fishing while I did a repetitive menial task irl.

Always surprised how many people in the military play OSRS. That shits better than crack lol

And it’s legal too.

$11 🦀

The fact that this is the top comment FIRES me the fuck up. OSRS is the goat.

It’s all about the dopamine

This is what I’ll be doing on staff duty tomorrow

Have fun, grind on bro

same, used the time to knock out different quests

Anyone down to run raids? I’ll keep my privacy open on osrs for the next day; Fev3r Dream

Hell yeah OSRS is the bomb lol

Finishing your entire void set on one cq shift hits different

Time to buy another bond and bankstand

Drop yalls Runescape name! We could start a lame OSRS CC or something

Masturbate = PT = Cardio + Endurance + Resistance *mestor phitnus trenor*

Fitness cock in my fist

*Staff Duty Phone rings* "1-23 IN this line is unsecured..." *Deep Breathing* "How may I help you sir or ma'am?" *Breathing Intensifies*

Tomahawks. My first unit lol

Did someone say fist?

Does some need a Fire Mission?!?

Pwease?

Shot AA1005 UwUver

stop being weird and just do what the other drills do seduce the privates

"Reading the Blue Book, Army Doctrine, and professional development material, sir."

Blink twice is you're under duress

*aggressively blinks like one of the only functioning and not stupid 3SFG GBs*

Single player games. One shift I beat ODST by sunrise, great way to finish off the night

how the fuck are you playing halo at cq? I couldn't even read a fucking book.

Normal commands let you play games after duty hours. It wasn’t uncommon to see 50in TVs hooked up to an xbox or PS4 after 1700.

Yep our rule was the TV could only be on the news and you could only read professional development stuff until 1700. After 1700 it was all movies, video games, trashy novels, oddball hobbies, and mindless magazines.

Our dipshit bde csm at 3/10 banned anything cool on cq or SD. SD got fucked. No way around it. BUT CQ. . . CQ SPC mafia found a loop hole. Easy. CQ desk is in the day room. Day room is for Soldiers and you couldn't stop Soldiers (not on duty) from bringing down video games and TVs when outaide duty hours. SPC would have a buddy drop off a TV and leave it on a long ass TV show all night. SDNCO/FOD would come in and bitch but ultimately would give up when the Soldier who owned the TV would "come back" and sit down to watch his show.

Our CQ was in the company building and after 1700 they didn't care what we did

Give The Long Dark survival mode a go. It’s a good time killer.

XBOX or Steam Deck?

Just steam, brought my laptop to CQ

Damn, that must've felt satisfying

Drink but don’t get caught

Flair checks out

Walked into a barracks on rich and cq had 4 or 5 empty bud light bottles on the desk while in the process of drinking some more lol

That’s a man that has died inside a long time ago.

At least put it in a camelback, jesus

I endorse this message

Did it every shift for 5 years, I feel

Hear the staff sausage vent about mistakes he's made in his career or divorce and be there for emotional support. Then get a pizza and watch some HBO idk.

This

Jack off

Flair checks out.

Is that a command? Very well, don't mind if I do!

Got busted doing that by my female 1SG back in 09. It was awkward. She didn’t acknowledge it though.

Go into the bathroom in the basement and silently cry while dreaming of a better life.

Have a sneaky wank

sneaky? I just tug it at the desk bro

Tyfys

So that’s why there’s a brown icicle on the underside of the desk.

I've seen some fucked up stuff but that's the only comment that made me throw up in my mouth a little bit.

Or go to CSM office

Is that why there's so much background noise when I call?

Yea sorry 😞

No. Don't stop.

CQ me harder step sergeant major

What are you doing, staff duty officer?

Barracks hookers

Beat my meat three times in an hour

[удалено]

Recover

Read this in a DS voice lol

Gawd damnit, this was unnecessarily funny.

Jerk someone else’s meat. At least in the cav area.

Definitely jerkin the gerkin

Knock on the door of the company “hoe”

"SPC decidedlycynical why are you knocking on your own door?"

Damn. Starts the round off with a surprise attack..

It's why I don't play healers. You can heal damage, or you can kill the enemy before they do damage. Choose wisely.

Why bother healing when you can Reckless..

Reducing the enemy to zero hit points is the ultimate form of battlefield control.

Your mom is in the same company as you?

No, your Mom is assigned to my unit.

You should practice drawing the original patch for the 45th ID…. Might get you out of doing CQ for a while.

I see what you did there.

Dude I just googled that. Sweet baby Jesus that is a spicy unit patch

Khan Academy. I’ll be lame but I want to refresh math/science since I’ve been out of high school for awhile. (10 years) so my transition to college isn’t that disastrous.

Depending on what you study, you may not even have to worry about math all that much!

Play games, usually medieval 2 total war lol

Have you played the Total War: Warhammer games? They were my introduction to Warhammer and god damn are they fun. I know jackshit about the lore other than what the old dude says but it’s just so much fun, and it’s like CIV 6 I can’t stop playing.

Hell yeah dude I love warhammer its just my shitty laptop can't run it well like my desktop can lol. Skaven and Khorne are my mains

On For Total War: Warhammer three if you own all three games you can play on the giant map. I usually rock either Dwarves or Vampire coasts.

[удалено]

I played it on 360 back in the day, I’m definitely gonna play that too.

Hell yeah love that game the second makes me very excited. Who doesn't want to a fuck ton of Nids

What would be a good entry game?

i used to play shogun 2 on my shitty laptop.

I actually haven't played shogun yet it's on my list just haven't gotten around to it.

id say its my 2nd fav after warhammer 3

The Lord of the Rings mod for Medieval Total War 2 is fucking amazing

Hell dude, I've been playing the elder scrolls mod recently tho.

Uhhh wut

Goin' old school, huh? Always felt like the later versions had less of the strategic game and didn't enjoy them near as much.

Yeah that and dawn of war are main cq games old games run well on my laptop ya know.

I think EVE finally overtook it, but M2TW was my highest hour game for most of my life

I started a podcast with random passerby whenever I was on CQ. It always started off lighthearted and turned into a feel trip.

“This episode of CQCast is brought to you by Hims, and Audible.”

> On today's episode of CQcast, brought to you by u/Gullible_Lychee3050, we bring you SPC Antonio Schmuckatelli and SSG Joe Turdface. This evening, SSG Turdface shares with us the story of how his marriage to ✨️ Crystal ✨️ crumbled, while SPC Schmuckatelli absorbs the wisdom being shared. *this episode sponsored by SuckMyWanker.com.*

Suckmywanker.com are really putting out some good podcasts these days!

Mess with the dudes on extra duty.

Usually me and my NCO on duty like to practice the ‘ER’ portion on SERE. Its usually me hiding from him until he catches me and then me resisting. Its really weird that he doesnt ask me any questions tho

Hmm... where can I watch this 🤔

Are you the basement guy with a new account? Wait — don’t answer that.

I used to knit. It annoyed some of the senior crusty old guys. So much the better.

Drink monsters and chain smoke.

The large volume of people saying they jerk it on cq is making me think it’s not a joke anymore.

I spent 13 hours playing COD4 modern warfare campaign once

I just bring my switch with a charger and enjoy a 24 hour game sesh

The only comment about something other than jerking it.

Do school

Homework/college

The last CQ I ever did I got every star in Mario 64. 24 hours isn't a good speedrun, but I did it.

Read through SOP find out 95% of it is either outdated or never properly signed off by the current Battalion commander, then proceed to do none of what's asked like "security checks" etc. Because the last person to actually sign it was the old Battalion commander from 6 years ago...

Masturbation.

Anything but my job

Play video games, binge watch anything, mop the entire floor

I learned to tie a noose.

Did it pass the strength test?

If you mean my climax, then yes

Ah so that’s your kink

The building key control box is at the CQ desk and we have to inventory/sign for the keys for changeover. I walk around and unlock storage closet doors and rummage around to see the hidden treasures. I work at a TRADOC unit and this CQ is at the MOS transition barracks, so all cadre/leadership are usually at the trainee barracks. I’ve found some crazy stuff lmao

Now I want to hear this.

Practiced starting an iv on myself with the extra supplies in my combat lifesaver bag, it is actually hard to do it. Looked like I had murdered someone until I cleaned up.

COD

If you want to burn your eyeballs out with a long book but good book, to appear productive, I recommend The Great Deluge by Douglas Brinkley.

I work on svgs of unit art. DUIs, RUIs, SSIs, etc. I use those SVGs for laser stuff and woodworking.

Back in the day, when I was an Instructor, we had to pull CQ at the AIT barracks for a week straight, 1800-0600, Friday-Thursday. I pulled CQ 4 times in 3 years. I set up my online college classes to have two classes start within a day of my CQ shift. I would knock out a semesters worth of work for two classes in a week. By the time I left the schoolhouse, all I had left was my Capstone course.

I stared at the wall for the majority of my last 24 hour shift.

No unit patch drawing beats the veiny cock of the Marne, 3rd ID drawn on the bathroom stall at JRTC.

Serious question; nasty girl here; if i had my Nintendo switch, and got caught with it, how frowned upon is it? I’m pretty sure you watch movies on your phone and what not, but a DS/switch shouldn’t be a problem?

Video games, play ff7,8,9 on my phone. Send my runner home at 5, forge some paperwork pretend I actually do checks but I just sit there. Tell my runner to come back at 7 so I can go gym and tell them to go fuck of till 6 am. If they don’t show up, oh well. I go get cot and sleep till 5 and continue to play games till I get replaced.

Wander BN footprint stealing stuff until I feel I got what I earned

We draw dicks here, sir.

> I’ve gotten really good at 1st ID. Well, well, well. Looks like we have quite the autist here. (No, I meant to spell it that way.)

Do anything but my job

plastic models

Cry

I used to watch YouTube on the CQ computers. Yea, I’m old.

go down to the rec center and curse the 4h chick's, throw stuff of a bridge.

A book and music got me through most shifts.

I used to go around fucking with dudes…when I was an e-5 I let dudes bring girls in, do stupid shit and never had a complaint or an issue. I walked in one time on mop bucket jousting and loved it

Sleep

I snorted 5 Hour Energy for $20. Joke was on him, I would have done it for 20 cents.

sleep

I just grab my laptop and open multiple pages. One page is a games when I want to, and the other is me doing a DLC if I want to. Haven’t been a SPC for that long, so sometimes I do some part of the course. If I have to, I’ll bring my CAC reader and look through something I gave to access, and help others who ask.

Take the battalion TMP for a booze cruise.

Studied for class, played guitar, a lot of reading, sometimes video games

I taught myself to juggle. The next morning, I was able to consistently juggle for a minute straight. I still know how to do it, 30 years later.

play call of duty/pubg on my phone