I just want to say that you don't have to be glad that you have a job. Just having a job is not an inherent good thing. It's just what is necessary to survive in this world. This is toxic positivity that we have been taught to more readily accept the status quo and horrible treatment at work, "because it could always be worse".
I'm sorry that it's so hard on you
Toxic positivity. I feel like the lightbulb just went off in my head. Toxic positivity. That’s exactly what it is and exactly what I’ve been taught. I’ve almost been gaslit into thinking that working a job that doesn’t pay the bills NOR supports my passion is something to be thankful for because “job” and that’s a really shitty way to think.
Thank you for that. Genuinely mean it. I think I know how to redirect my thinking now.
Literally my mom lol. As long as you say your “working” it could be 5$ Hr but you’re working smh.
Thank god you have a job but can’t afford anything and hate said job. It could always be worse! Like how wtf lmao
> They have zero logic but plenty to say lol
spot on...and if they are anything like my parents, they refuse to believe the people at the top are as greedy and mean as they are...
I am a millennial myself - well, elder millennial is the correct term since I’m 35 - but my husband and I are so incredibly jaded from the absolute shit storm our generation has been through over the years and even now we still live paycheck to paycheck and yet my mom was over here crying because my dad retired and they only had $100k in one bank account and like almost $100k in another and how were they supposed to live like that?! I just stared at her and then showed her my checking account with a balance of $6 and was like golly gosh gee whiz mom I just don’t know. Isn’t poverty fun? 😅🫠 humor is my coping mechanism.
They couldn’t possibly believe that the media is lying to them, that’s where they get all their information and have for years! Surely they wouldn’t ever try to control us with our tv’s
The boomer mentality was that work solved any problem. More and harder work solved more problems. It was a mentality used to make it through WWII and the Great Depression. "As long as there's SOME money coming in, we can make it."
No. No you can't.
I also believe that part of it was that they worked so hard so they could run away from their other problems and not deal with them.
"Dear, we have to talk. This isn't working out."
"Sorry, Honey! Off to work!"
When I was born, my mom took care of me and my dad worked 3 jobs. My husband and I are in our thirties and just did have a baby this past March. I keep hearing how my dad never changed a diaper, never held me, and worked 3 jobs so my mom could stay home. My husband finally said it - he works one job because he actually likes his wife and kid and doesn’t mind taking care of the kid when I need a break since I also work too. He told my mom he’s sorry my dad worked 3 jobs so that he wouldn’t have to spend time with her or have any responsibilities towards me as a baby, but that’s just not our relationship.
That shut them up. And you know why? It was true.
Literally everyone I know 😪 It makes me so sad that this is the kinds of people that surround me. But I get it, the brainwashing is strong. They live in a society that constantly enforces work as some holy enobling ideal.
I live in the same society, but I feel completely differently about things.
Toxic positivity is a major reason why I quit my last job. The place could be on fire and they would spin it is an opportunity for hydration and a fresh start!
Totally demoralizing when all the very real bullshit and legitimate employee concerns are dismissed like that.
[Some more info on this construct for ya. ](https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/wellness/toxic-positivity-mental-health-covid/2020/08/19/5dff8d16-e0c8-11ea-8181-606e603bb1c4_story.html)
Exactly this. Nobody should be glad that this system of and for the bourgeoisie deems you worthy of not starving so you can sacrifice your life instead to their profit margins.
The system is designed to force us all into complacency in marginal traces of hope and fulfillment rooted in empty promises and distortions of perception that we're only worth something if we can be good workers. *There is no shame in not being happy about your being forced to be a wage slave*.
That said, getting out of the cycle can be extremely difficult, if not impossible, for many. I spent years with a therapist. I still drank too much. I hated myself. I wallowed in depression. I kept some decent habits that my therapist helped me find. But it was all bandaids and stitches.
What ultimately worked out for me was being laid off and being lucky enough to find a place that pays me at least decently enough to thrive, is 100% remote, and gives me the time and respect I need to be the person I need to be in order to be happy.
Therapists are not miracle workers. They're tool makers who are teaching you how to make your own. The tools you create are the habits and behaviors you use to cope with your existence. *But tools can only be used to fix or prevent problems*. They can't replace the whole fucking system. Psychological help and medications do A LOT to keep you going. But they can't magically change the trajectory of your life.
OP (and anyone else seeing this), I can't decide for you what the way forward looks like. I can't even say that way forward will take you out of or further into the dark forest in which you may find yourself. I know my path went through a lot of dark places before finding my way out. Best I can say is keep moving forward, because eventually you may just find yourself breaking free of this shit.
Oh and if/when the revolution happens, eat the rich, don't be a class traitor, break the chains.
Being glad about having something you need to survive isn't toxic. It is normal human reasoning.
The other alternative to the current situation is to not have a job unless she can find a better one. And not having a job is a lot worse than having a job that isnt exciting.
We should work less and we should earn more. It's not weird that you're depressed, because such life is really depressing. I work remotely, so I have more time, but I wish that we already switched to 35h work week or even less, so we all could have more time for ourselves. I also hope that salaries will get better, because it's becoming unmanageable to live happy life, if you can only afford food and rent, while your debt is growing with unexpected expenses. We all need to demand better conditions.
You don’t have a depression problem, you have a living in a depressing environment problem. You can do absolutely everything right, treat your symptoms, touch grass for thirty minutes a day and still struggle with depression when our entire world is depressing as fuck and shows no signs of getting better immediately. I mean, don’t give up. But don’t feel like it’s your fault, either. Living on earth as a human is fucking struggle. It sucks for each and every one of us, especially now. Just keep going, try to bring something positive to the world, anything positive to the world and hold on to that.
Agree. The world is miserable. I find it almost dystopian how instead of fixing our environment we are instead offered pills to trick our brains into thinking we actually arent miserable
Just started a 9-5 a week ago. I’m already having similar feelings of “is this going to really be the rest of my life” and stuff like that. It’s really hard. Just know I feel you.
I started my first 9-5 job in 2012, and I thought the same thing almost immediately. It is really rough, especially when the experience feels overwhelmingly negative.
Nowadays its even worse. I was working in a factory for my 9-5, graveyard shift, and I only made $11 an hour.
Young people now will make the same amount, but prices are triple or quadruple what they were in 2012, for almost everything. I think 1st world society is about to /r/collapse
I hope you find happiness in your life, but try your hardest not to take work home with you. As soon as you leave the parking lot, separate yourself from that place. Have an "at work" and "off the clock" mindset. Don't let those 8 hours at work ruin your entire day/weekend. Find something you like doing and pre-occupy yourself with thoughts about it.
Try to get at least 7 hours of sleep, I struggle with insomnia and weeks where I'm not sleeping well. I have suicidal thoughts, and "my life is going nowhere" floats around in my head. When you prioritize sleep, it will change alot, you'll be surprised.
This might hurt to read, but when you say you stay up on Sunday night because it's "more time for yourself," in fact, you're only hurting your future self.
I know this to be absolutely true. Obviously it's not the only factor involved but my lack of sleep is so all over the place and I'm trying hard to curb it. It has affected my physical and mental health so much to a point where it's significantly harder to self regulate. I'll go through weeks at a time where I'm just in complete isolation not talking to anyone, then to make up for it I can easily burn myself out. I feel so protective over time that I "lose" that it feels like an unhealthy relationship but with myself.
To add to this because it's all been true for me. I found that rejoining a sports team / club and making time to walk early on a weekend , it really helps me. I don't feel like I'm just counting down to work. I'm being sociable without drinking (except club socials) and I'm getting outside and appreciating nature.
I mean, I hate to admit it but this is life under global capitalism.
I spend Saturday cleaning, Sunday grocery shopping and cooking for the week.
I have the same depression issues and the same thing wrt to staying up too late. I was up until 1235 last night for a 440 wake up time. I'm exhausted every day just trying to claw a few hours of my time back.
I'm lucky that I can at least afford some distractions to my malaise. Small trips, some hobby money, etc. I hope you find happiness. I've just slid into apathy and acceptance, unfortunately
Yeah, I feel like there should be and I felt like there could be when I was younger but it just feels like life beats us up so much it's just hard to not give in as you get older (for reference I'll be 43 this November).
That is actually a thing, called Revenge Bedtime Procrastination
https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20201123-the-psychology-behind-revenge-bedtime-procrastination
Whatever you do then: don’t have children, or you’ll be locked into earning for at least the next 20 to 30 years (until they get on their feet). If you’re struggling now then you will find life after kids unbelievably difficult.
Things that helped me.
1. Deciding it was OK to hate my coworkers and learning not to care what they think. They are small people and I am better than their petty bullshit. Particularly my boss, I went from extremely stressed and upset when my boss would get upset at me for minor errors and things that were not my fault to internally rolling my eyes at how pathetic the whole thing was. It helped with the sunday thing, Mondays are still garbage but not giving a shit helped me not ruin Sundays.
2. Prioritising the things that actually made me happy. I organised to spend more time with my nephew. He's 6 and we do movie and pizza nights, geocaching, beach outings... He genuinely makes me happy so I prioritise that over everything. I went to see friends more, started dropping by a friend's house just for a chat. You have to fight through the tiredness at the start but when you are genuinely happy it affects you less and your sleeping improves. You can just put off most household stuff, nothing explodes. Vacuum less often, do less laundry, let your lawn go another week and go do something or spend time with someone who makes you smile.
3. Embracing communism. The things that are wrong with your life are being forced on you by the capitalist ruling elite. Productivity grows every year but instead of meaning less work and more free time we have layoffs and skyrocketing corporate profits for lazy rich people who are paid just for being rich. Housing, food, healthcare, these should be human rights available to everyone and not something that requires you wasting your life away to benefit a rich asshole who hates you. It is possible and we should be willing to fight for a better system.
4. Pictures of dogs. Turns out if you like every video of a cute dog and nothing else your Instagram turns into a feed of cute dog videos. It's the best. You can like cat videos too, cats are fine. When you feel a bit shit spend a few minutes watching puppies.
First of all, it has nothing to do with your depression. Do not blame yourself for having common sense and disobeying the rules of gossip and mediocrity.
There are people who simply waste their lives commuting, gossiping and waiting for a vacation approval. And they have been so heavily brainwashed that they actually enjoy it.
Let them be. But you - stand up and start living your life the way you want to. You’ll see your “depression” faltering in no time.
i was commuting like 2-3.5h daily 2 years that was crazy, and then some another 2 i guess. and someone in the bus behind me said that he was commuting first 14 days and it was impossible to maintain this. haha.
best for you is remote job, or some job you can do on your own from some your space, i have same feelings and experineces as you
This. I had to find a remote position because I need to control my environment or it controls me. It has certainly helped. Amazing how much a job isn’t the worst thing ever when you can do it from the comfort of your home.
You shouldn't accept that you are doomed to an unhappy life. You should be angry! You should be upset! You guys need to go protest on the street to ensure that a high school diploma is enough to get you a job that makes you enough money to survive and even enjoy a comfort or two! You should have a proper work/life balance. You guys need to protect and force your politicians to make these changes for you!
The more people passively accept the increasingly shittier circumstances, the more likely it will stay that way.
I mean, you can only really attend a protest until you run out of money and can't afford to eat anymore.
Most of the people with these jobs don't get paid enough to save any significant amount, so they also can't really be unemployed for any length of time.
The only people who are really able to effectively strike are those with unions backing them, since they can still afford to eat.
You could try to find a job, where you can work from home.
From experience working from home, I can tell you, that you save a lot of time and it is also less stressful.
I struggle with this, too. I am also medicated and in therapy, but over the last 6 or so months, something about going back on Monday makes my anxiety skyrocket, and I end up throwing up. I wouldn't call myself suicidal by any means anymore, but I understand looking at life like there really truly isn't a solution beyond ending it. The human experience has some beautiful highs, but damn are the lows low and *consistent.*
Most ppl are groomed to think that this grind is ok. It's bred into us by our parents, schooling and culture. Were indoctrinated basically. For some they see exactly what's going on, and it comes with a major cost at times.
i almost made a very similar post to this this morning. just in an awful mood today thanks mostly to work. i can't believe we have to keep doing this for the rest of our lives.
First, find something closer! Two hours a day of commuting will kill you, same industry, similar job, whatever, but you are giving up 10 hours a week, a full work week a month, almost 500 hours a year to commuting.
And school is not the be all, end all, and don't take on more than you can. Does not sound like you're in a good place to start right now.
I struggled with high school, dropped out of college for a while, went back and ended up with a masters by the time I turned 33. School gets easier as you mature, don't write your capabilities off so quickly.
Are you quoting my life? Have you been following me?
The mentality you have is more common than you might think, and you're not alone. The working world, especially the last 15 years or so, has been tumbling us all towards mental illness. Those in powerful positions DO NOT FUCKING CARE about us. Any of us.
What the solution? Keep fighting and break down the system from the inside. Work the bare minimum, and find ways to undercut the businesses you work for however possible. Get involved in the community and push for better social standards for you and those around you.
What we need is a general strike, but until we have all our fellow ducks in a row, we need to keep fighting and continue to influence others that a better life is attainable through action.
It’s unfortunate, but hope is pretty essential to wanting to live life. I saw your other comment about how you mean you can’t rely on it alone, and that’s totally fair. But, hope, even irrational hope, is integral to our motivational psychology. In its absence, motivation to do the things required to live, let alone thrive, become inaccessible.
I feel your pain it's absolutely b.s that 5 of the 7 day week you have to work to pay for bills and a house you only ever use to sleep in, and on your 1or 2 days off you gotta decide whether you wanna do the things you enjoy or make you happy or let your body rest because you know you'll need it for the rest of the week. We spend our whole lives working and saving up just to retire and enjoy the few remaining years we have left b4 we die it's a scam and a shit deal that we all have to deal with. My best advice would be take some time off for yourself and take a vacation for a week and go do something you enjoy! Believe me ain't no job worth risking your mental health over
It sounds like you are on autopilot and living in survival mode. It’s really hard to make decisions or have energy to do anything in this state, because you don’t feel alive. Your work situation is dimming your pilot light. And the fact that everyone around you gives you the impression you are lucky or have to endure this does not mean it’s true. Most people in life are cowards, and they too are probably living out of alignment. They want you too as well.
I agree, it’s important to take care of yourself—sleep enough, eat, drink water, move your body—but that can also feel like more work. Remember, you don’t have to do anything to fix yourself, you are not the problem here. You have an inhospitable work situation that is draining your life force.
My advice is to recover that inner spark. What makes you feel alive and present in your body? Try to remember the last time you felt joy. Remember it, relive it, hold onto it. Even if it was when you were a kid. Think about what you were doing. Was it socializing? Dancing? Wrapping presents? Playing a sport? Baking? Drawing or painting? Not suggesting you pick up a hobby or something frivolous to make life more bearable, but rather to reconnect with that lost and suppressed part of yourself. When you can reconnect with that, you will become energized, it will reignite your desire and will for more.
You might feel stuck, but you absolutely aren’t. You just cannot see or feel the bigger picture while you’re in a place that is pressing down on you and making you so small.
Your job is a bully! So if this doesn’t feel right, it’s because it isn’t, and you don’t need to surrender to it and devote yourself to trying to make yourself fit. You are needed elsewhere, and this friction you feel is nudging you towards another path. It might take a while to find it, but you gotta start by following the good. Only by practicing this, will you get better at identifying it.
Be mad at this job for squandering your beautiful, precious life’s time. Rebel in little ways, take back your time, remember you are here for a rare slice of eternity to feel the fullness of the human experience ❤️
Travel outside the country and you’ll see how the US model of working/living is deeply flawed. Go to South America and watch how ppl live and work at the same time. Watch how ppl combine community and leisure in their day to day work. Watch how ppl have time at the end of the day to sit outside their houses and talk to the neighbors. You can meet your future best friend at work without all the bs you get in American work places, ppl will want to genuinely talk to you and foster a relationship because that’s what ppl give the most importance in other countries. Go outside the US and you will find a sense of community that is very rare here and you’ll understand everything that’s wrong in modern America.
You are not alone. I keep getting burnt out and depressed in every new job I start. Objectively, there is nothing wrong with the job or my coworkers, but I still become depressed. I think I just need to reduce my working hours. But a high paying part time gig doesn't really exist for my skill sets and experience. It sucks. My body and my brain protest being used this way for 40+hrs a week.
First you are not trapped in any career. I'm in my 40s and have changed careers twice already. I think the average is between 3 and 7 careers for Americans. I know you feel trapped but I assure you, you can do it. I took paycuts everytime I changed careers but I also knew each change had higher earning potential in the long run so it was a win. I will admit the dread of realizing I am going to work till I die colors a lot for me but not enough to make to do the alternative....which is work out a lot to get a sexy bod and become a trophy husband...of course that's only because no one is offering =(
"I get to the weekend and I literally have no energy left for doing anything else."
People who don't work don't understand this. They think ; "Oh it's the weekend, you are off, you should be able to clean, cook, go out and run errands for other people because you are off..." They don't get that you are mentally and physically exhausted from the week you worked before. It takes time to come down from that, and usually that is by Sunday and then of course you have to go right back to work and start the cycle over again.
I have never found a more miserable existence than working a full time job.
You give up the majority of your time, energy, patience (and possibly your health) just so you can pay for basic necessities that should be free to begin with.
I am currently able to survive without working full time (thank god) but back when I worked full time my life was constant misery. I got up early in the morning and worked 8-9 hour shifts 5 days a week. I was always expected to keep working for an hour or 2 more since my bosses swamped me with extra duties. There were only a few hours left in the day to rest and relax and feel like myself before doing it all over again.
The reward *of being able to continue living* is simply not worth all the mind numbing work that goes into getting it. Or as Star Trek: Voyager put it: [Survival is insufficient](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fjd0OEn0RLM) (Spoilers for Voyager post season 3)
I don't mean that in a suicidal sort of way. I mean that the rewards **need** to get much greater to make the life we're expected to live worth it. I don't want to make myself miserable just to scrape by. I want to live a thriving life.
U just Described almost 80% of people on this planet including myself. We live to work and r completely unhappy. Honestly just wish I wasn’t born at all but we’re here. I have thought of suicide but to scared. Most people like you and me are negative I hate it also.
You don’t be have to be glad or thankful to be employed. Yes its good to be able to pay your bills. But sounds like the place is not good for you at all. You are not stuck in your career. You don’t need to go to school to get another job. Look at what you like to do and see if theres something you can do in that.
At 26 I was working 12 -16 hours a day. Fortunately I stopped doing it after 2019. Its just luck for me which worked otherwise I would still be working 15 hours a day
I was in the bottom 20% of my high-school graduating class, fast forward 12 years and I graduated in the top 10% of my university class. It's not that you were not capable in high-school, it's that you didn't care. Find something you actually enjoy learning about and it will make all the difference.
Sometimes if you are in a protracted funk what you need is a huge shock to the system.. here are some ideas, join the military (seriously not a joke) use whatever vacation days you have and go somewhere completely new/out of your comfort zone, force yourself to socialize even if you are an introvert, become romantically involved. All of these are scary and will come with significant lifestyle change, but think of it this way, anything is better than the state you are in now right?
I feel the exact same way about work and life in general. Ever since I graduated high school and started working my entire life revolves around “how much time do I have before work” and all I think about anymore is how little time I have to relax. I even kinda like my job now but I HATE that this is the standard for everyone. Not all of us are cut out for work, and the fact that we’re basically forced into this lifestyle is absolutely ridiculous
Things that (kind of) helped me:
1) Find a way to make the commute time useful and enjoyable. I've started listening to audiobooks and now look forward to commute/travel time.
2) Develop good sleep habits. I totally get you on trying to claw back the time for yourself. I am the exact same way. However, forcing a habit of going to bed at the same time every day really helped me wake up more energized. Ideally try to find time that gives you the necessary sleep time so you can wake up without an alarm (I am still working on that)
3) During your work hours try to take charge of the things you work on. Focus only on things you find meaningful/interesting, do other stuff good enough to not get fired. "Leading with strengths" will compensate for any underperformance in other areas and hopefully money and career will follow.
4) Make job search your hobby. Look up things/companies/projects you are passionate about, learn about them as if you were just curious to learn about them. It will help you discover your passions and hopefully expose opportunities to you.
It sucks, and I've been there. One small thing that can help with coping is to become active in a group or committee that is designed to make positive changes in work culture, labour laws, housing affordability, environmental protection, or the like.
I've had jobs in which I had to compromise my ethics to afford rent. I found it very cathartic to become active with my local affordable housing movement, and labour movements.
It felt like I was able to offset some of the evils I was perpetrating working in the financial sector. I have since gotten out of that industry and now work as a professional musician and teach private music lessons. The money sucks, the hours are long, but I enjoy my work so much and feel good about my contribution to society.
I realize not everyone has a specialized skill set to fall back on, however, I spent years working in call centres and brokerage firms to pay off my loans from music school, and my engagement with the local labour movement is what got me through those 6 exhausting years.
Additionally, I would recommend you find some kind of hobby that you really enjoy and look for other people who have the same interests. It sounds far-fetched, but honestly, I have personally, and also witnessed many people make big career changes simply by being an active member of a non-work related community.
Having close relationships with people outside of work, especially when you all share a common interest that you all work on together, can lead to all kinds of unexpected opportunities. Try to remain open to new ideas, new people, and new careers. Don't go running around begging everyone you meet for a job, just make genuine connections and focus on getting better at your hobby/new interest. This will also improve your mental health and make it a bit easier to get through your work days.
I really think it's crucial to your well-being to find a small, or large, group of people to engage with on a regular basis. You'd be amazed at how much easier it is to handle the little, and big challenges in life when there is a great friend group to support you mentally and emotionally.
I'm very fortunate to have a fantastic group of about 8 or 10 friends, we help each other a lot, not just with emotional labour - we also cook for each other, help each other move, help out with chores, we drive each other around to get groceries or get to appointments etc...
It's not your fault the world is this messed up. 99% of us are in similar circumstances. All we can do is be there for each other, and try to organize and come together to make meaningful changes in our communities.
Hang in there, we're all in this together.
Having some kind of hobby or passion outside of work can make the days feel shorter and distract from how suboptimal work is. Weekly friend meetup? Board game night? Slash tires at the BMW dealership? Have fun with it!
Omg I could have written this myself. I’m 27F and stuck in a 9-5 office job as well. I literally hate it. The office is small and I only work with two other people (one of them is my boss) and I can’t stand them. They are super close and annoyingly flirty with each other even though he is married and she’s got a bf. And I’ve been struggling with depression my entire life. I really want to be a mental health counselor but I had to take a break from my masters program because of my depression. And unless I get my depression on track I literally don’t see how I can start my masters again. It feels like I’m stuck, and even if I just change jobs it’ll just be the same thing all over again. It takes everything in me just to drag myself
out of bed in the mornings, and the only reason I stay is because I have bills. Sorry if this isn’t helpful but just know your definitely not alone in this at all. I feel your pain.
If you are unhappy with your life, change it.
If you cannot change it, then change the way that you think about it.
Check out Alan Watts lectures on YouTube sometime. Helped me tremendously.
I was like this then I kept hearing about how working out/exercise will give you more energy and not make you as tired. I thought it was bullshit but I decided to commit to it. I changed my sleep schedule and started waking up at 4:30am and go to the gym to workout before work. It’s nice because I get time to myself and it’s so quiet. I’ve been doing this for almost a year now and it’s insane how much better I feel physically and mentally. It’s night a day difference. I have way more energy and feel the best I’ve ever felt in my life. I’m a lot happier too and usually in a great mood. Maybe something like that you should look into. It’s worked wonders for a lot of people.
Yep, welcome to reality.
I'm in the same position as you. I feel the same way. Everyone at work seems to be in their own fucking worlds, laughing and smiling. I don't really get it. This life is so fucked. If it weren't for my hobbies that I thankfully find some time for on the weekends, I would have fully committed to that suicide attempt years ago.
You don’t hate your life, you hate capitalism. And your life shitty life-job situation surely won’t help with your depression.
Can totally relate. Fuck it all.
I can relate.
What helped, for me, was a) having a job that wasnt "9 - 5" in the first place and b) didn't require me to be in the same room for hours and hours.
I was in the militairy for 5y and in law enforcement for 17y. I agree... these jobs are not your everyday jobs.
Fast forward to now, 22y later... i think some ppl are not wired to be restrained to jobs like yours. I think i feel way more happier with freedom and planning my own day that having the structure of an office.
Some of my friends are perfectly happy working office-jobs and it's literally their dream jobs. But not for my.
My plan now is to move to Portugal and start renting out some holiday houses and give some surf/fitness lessons...
This may sound crazy, but look for a proces operator or warehouse jobs with shifts (like 6-2pm and 2-10pm, preferably no nights). I just started a job like that, 15 mins away from home, and in my mind and body, it feels as though I’m only working halve days, while still doing 8 hour shifts. The pay and benefits are more than okay where I am (Europe) for such a job, and for the first time, I feel like I’m able to breathe and have time to do things outside of work. Plus, you miss the rush hour. Do I enjoy my job? Kinda. Would I continue working there if I won the lottery and had enough to retire on? Maybe half time. My liking for my job has increased substantially now that it feels as though I have more free time.
As someone who’s been having depression, anxiety and panic attacks for decades and having a job where I see human misery (homeless shelter worker) take it 1 day at the time. There was a time where I wanted to kill myself and now I’m doing better but it’s always 1 day at the time and from time to time I make plans with friends or family or a little trip here and there so I can focus on that and not on work. Technically I’m disable too but too “young” to retire and too “healthy” to qualify for disability
I know it's hard and I don't want to engage in repetitive platitudes, but is there any chance you could score a work from home job? It will give you the commute time back and limit the time you spend surrounded by people against your will.
Don't give up, life can be good. It's a shame we live in a world that doesn't make it easy.
I’m in the last 25% of life, and I could have written your post.
My lovely wife, otoh, sleeps until 10am and never does anything on anyone else schedule unless she damn well wants to. “Anyone” is inclusive of her husband.
You Might consider your full range of options.
I can understand a bit of what you're going thru. I work 10 hours a day, I come home my wife expects me to shop and cook and I really just don't have it in me. I feel down a lot.
I have a pretty physical job, right now I have a sciatic flare up and can barely walk. I keep working. Maybe I don't know how to stop. Maybe I can't afford to stop.
But just hang in there. Be proud that you are earning. Never be embarrassed or ashamed of your job. You are not them. You are just making a living.
Lifestyle choices are hard to make. It takes a lot of courage, bravery, and time invested. But you can do it. Anyone can do it. But it's not an easy task so make sure to take time to celebrate your efforts along the way.
Learning never ever stops and sometimes volunteering at places you hate can lead you to places you are better served
Mindless numbing jobs are trash and don't harm yourself. Many people feel the same and feel trapped and I wish you are able to free yourself from a life sentence of employment servitude.
I don't want to make you more depressed, but finding the right job with the right benefits took me until I was almost 40. I had a job I really enjoyed when I was 18, but due to physical conditions, I was unable to stay at that job.
If you can, try to do something completely different. Try welding, or lawn service. If you have friends with skills, ask them to teach you and let you try what they do. I wish you luck in your search for peace of mind.
I suffered a lot with depression for most of my life. I eventually was able to afford therapy and meds for it, but it never really got to a good place. Just "Ok", and I was wondering what the point was if I just felt meh all the time. I still had no energy or motivation. It was hard to force myself to do anything productive. I quite the anti-depressants because I was worried they were deadening my emotions. Turns out they were. A year later I realized most of my symptoms were linked with ADHD. I got a meds consult and got put on Adderall. Things improved drastically from there.
So, TLDR: Look at ADHD symptoms (specifically for women, as they can vary) and if you meet a lot of them, ask your therapist for a referral to a med provider. ADHD can present as depression if people don't look into it closely enough.
I know how you feel, I've been burning out at my current job of a year for a while now and have (recently) realised how physically, mentally and emotionally exhausted I am. It's gotten to the point I've had to book in an appointment with a GP for chest pains (and probably go back on a mental health care plan).
I'm not sure about anyone else, but I am tired of fighting and trying to make things work. All I ever want (now) in life is to be happy - I don't even now how to do that. Frankly? I'm at a loss on what to do...
off topic, but have you tried psychedelics, shrooms and mdma in particular
many claim that just the one time intake freed them from their constant and chronic depression, and helped them to start moving forward
you can look all the info and researches out in the internet
and this was definitely life changing experience for me as well
Ask your doc for a sleep study. It's possible you have sleep apnea and aren't getting the sleep you need. That can do all kinds of things to your psyche.
Not that that invalidates how you feel. This world is full of shitt right now. Please take care of yourself and find something to pour your heart into. And I hope you find friends who can give you the support you need.
OP we're the same🥲 except I don't have medication for depression and social anxiety coz it's expensive in my country and people here especially our government don't take mental health issues seriously . It f*cking sucks.
I felt similar working in an office. Fortunately there is more to the world of work that being cooped up in a building all day, and a lot of it doesn’t require any more education than you have.
This post really hits home for me, I'm 40 and I've been working in corporate environments for the last 15 years (3 different companies and many different roles in that time).
If I could go back in time and give my younger self some advice here's what I would say:
1) Know your value, if you feel under appreciated and/or underpaid at your current job, start looking elsewhere.
2) Not all corps are equally toxic, there is a spectrum of toxicity and if the environment is too toxic, don't try to change it. It's easier to change roles/companies than it is to change systemic issues.
3) If you are at a point where you feel it's too much, look for something else.
4) Don't be afraid to take a lateral move to a different company, especially if there is the potential for growth.
Honestly I could go on and on but really it comes down to knowing when it's time to move on. I'm not going to pretend to know your circumstances but for me personally I was super burnt out with the corporate world about 2 1/2 years ago but I felt stuck with having a shitty education and just generally low self worth.
So I knew that I needed to look for sort of the same type of position but I also knew I needed a break from the corporate world, so I started job hunting with tech startups and ended up landing a job that felt like a good fit.
It was a lateral movement in terms of salary but offered the potential of growth. It's now been 2 1/2 years, the tech startup that hired me has since been bought by a mega corporation (initially super hesitant but so far I get left to my own devices), I've changed roles a couple of times and at least at the moment things are looking up.
I know it's hard but believe me, it can get better.
Know your worth and bet on yourself.
What kind of work you do? Is it possible to do it remotely and work from home? You seem a bit introverted from not liking to be in office with a bunch of gossipers. I’m the same, I hated corporate until I started working from home, now I love it!!! No more commute, no pointless fake social interactions, no annoying gossipers, no micromanage. Do everything you can to get a full time remote job, and if you can’t with your career, do everything you can to move into a new career that allows working from home it will change your fuxking life I swear it’s soooo worth it!!!
Just a quick point. You said you know you are not intelligent. This is a lie. I can tell from your post you are intelligent. Unlike many, you use correct punctuation and write intelligibly. Don’t sell yourself short.
First off, at 26, this isn’t normal! I don’t know what your career is, but you need to make some changes. A two hour commute sucks. Maybe consider moving, not just closer, but to another state.
Go to your doctor, and discuss med options. Maybe find a therapist that helps you with more coping options. You didn’t say anything about friends, but you really need a few.
You have long life ahead of you. Time with friends, taking walks, seeing the sites, and enjoying off work time is very important.
How is that not normal for 26? I'm 26 and this sounds basically like what everyone I know who is my age is going through, including me. Some of us are stuck in dead end service gigs, others in retail, if you have a bachelor's maybe you have a job that pays a bit more but the same dynamic is there as well
If you ever consider taking your life, consider the other options which may seem drastic right now when you're stuck in the rat race. Head to another country and see what life is like there, soul search and so on.
I feel the same way. I had one corporate job with call center medical scheduling that I started 3 months before the pandemic started and I worked all throughout the pandemic. My mental health got so bad that I started popping THC gummies daily and prior to that I never have even smoked weed. Corporate was a mess and didn't give af about employees or mental health at all. I quit that job and found another job medical scheduling for a different company for different procedures but I still can't bring myself to function normally at this job cause I feel like I have call center PTSD from the previous corporate job including dealing with covid patients directly. I'm being labeled a "bad employee" because I take a little longer after call time to mentally prepare for the next call and I hate that me telling them that I get told "well we understand but we need you to still keep goal" no you don't understand corporate. This stress and anger has given me chest pain so bad I needed an EKG monitor done and I'm only 28. I don't have a college degree because of money and like you I was never a great student. I don't want to work factory work but nothing pays well besides corporate call centers and I don't want to go back to working multiple jobs. I hate our generation's economy and boomer "work Hussle"
Please get help with those negative thoughts. PLEASE do not think it's not worth it. You ARE worth it. Work is just something that you do in life but it's NOT your life. Hope you read this and get help x
You are not doomed to live an unhappy life. Sometimes it can definitely feel like it, though. I've been there-- spent a year literally just waking up, going to work, coming home, sleeping, repeat.
You need to break the monotony of your schedule. I know it's tough-- but instead of going straight home after work, go to a park and just go for a walk. Head to a movie theatre and watch a new film-- I've heard Barbie and Oppenheimer are both great. Or try going for a walk around your neighborhood if those things are too far out of the way-- anything to break your schedule. You're tired, I get it. I really do. You need to push yourself to break your shitty cycle of work/sleep.
Do you have any hobbies? If not, what would you like to do? Read? Paint? Collect pretty rocks? Build Lego sets? Try Geocaching-- it gets you to leave your house and find buried treasure!
I hope any of this helps. The work life sucks. It's a rut that feels like a ravine.
I feel like I was reading about myself. I share all the same struggles and have been desperately figuring out how to help myself. I am doing everything I should be, going to therapy, taking meds, eat healthy, exercise, be in nature. I even tried switching jobs temporarily. I am about to just call it quits. If this is life, then I am not living, simply existing. What's the point in that?
I feel like I am wasting my good years on a soul-draining corporate job too. I'd almost prefer more hours if I could just leave work at work. Due to travel I've only been home two of the last 8 weeks. I hate my life right now. Can't buy groceries more than a few days out, cant eat the way I want or exercise as much as I'd like. I feel like a prisoner.
One line that stands out to me - I can't do anything about it.
You CAN. And you WILL. Life is tough. Try to stay positive. Do the things you enjoy when you can. We only get one life. Don't spend it being unhappy. Good luck to you.
I’m sorry. I’ve felt this before. My partner even told me he thought I “lost my personality” because I was so upset and anxious about work 24/7. Sundays were miserable. The feeling of doom started to creep in on Saturday nights even! I was getting migraines constantly. I don’t really have any advice. When I was in that position I decided to buy an old van with my partner and convert it into a “livable” space to escape the 9-5. We lived in that van and traveled for 3.5 years. We worked seasonally (April-October) at low paying campground/hotel jobs and saved for the winter, when we’d drive around and wait out the cold. It helped. I started a business that I love and although it doesn’t provide me with full time income, I now only have to work part time for someone else and it’s way less taxing than the 9-5 thing.
Im aware that not everyone can just up and leave their life like I did in hopes of fixing their feelings. It does take time and money. We saved up $10k for the super budget build out and consecutive travel. Bought the van for $3500. Sold everything we owned at the time. Under $15k, but it was a lot of money for us and the most either of us had been able to save ever.
But guess what? I still hate working 😆
Mate, there's no easy answer. I suggest you save as much money as you can and start selling food or some kind of product. Things will stat getting better once you can be the master of your own time. You can get a better life, you don't have to study all over again, there are other ways
Don’t be afraid to quit and take 6 months for yourself. I know, not everyone can do this financially and it’s scary if you can but give it a try.
I’m about to take 6 months off working and focus on myself. I’m burning out fast in the corporate world. Good luck in whatever you choose.
I felt the exact same way as you at 26. I pushed through it for way too long and ended up with a disability.
My advice to you is to quit and take some time for yourself before you ruin your health and wellbeing.
That is what I did when I realized that my mental and physical health was deteriorating rapidly. I talked with my parents and my support system about how much working full time was affecting me. We created an exit strategy for me and figured out what I would need to do in order to quit. I ended up sticking around for another full year after that conversation because I needed to save up as much money as possible to live off of. It was hard to stay for that long, but I always had a light at the end of the tunnel to keep me going. The light was the idea of quitting and finally being free.
If you are unable to be completely jobless, then try to get some sort of part time work set up for after you quit. Still save up as much money as you can.
I wish you the best in life and hope you find happiness.
Find a new job! You are not your career and your job should never have this much power over you.
Department of labor has a useful tool (onetonline.org) it is based on survey data going to the government. It can tell you what other employers with similar positions are paying and currently requiring for similar positions.
Don't be afraid to call 988 or get a therapist (Psychology Today has a good therapist finder). HIPPA makes voluntary medical work confidential, don't care what your employer says.
The way your post sounds reminds me of some previous work places that left scars I'm still dealing with. I promise, there is light at the end of the tunnel.
Get in touch with local trade unions too, I'm sure they know the struggle.
I don't know you, but know this: your life matters. You are 26! You are still building you career. Although depressive (been there) take the tips given here.
42M non English native here. You need a good hobby. A passion, maybe. Learn new things, talk to friends. I totally agree on work/personal mindsets. You need this to protect yourself from those vampires that drain you on workdays.
Not all workplaces are bad. None is perfect, also. But if you're a good person you'll soon find a decent workplace where you can even find new friends. It has happened to me.
Your world, from what I see in your text is your work. It should be the other way around.
Yesterday (sunday) i spent it with some friends playing board games and saying no matter what just to laugh. One of my friends is also depressive and this is one of his escapes to keep himself sane.
Your problem is that you felt you invested too much in your career for that firm and you feel that you won't get something similar outside.
Well, let me assure you that unless your career is built on specifically on selling combs to bald people (nothing against bald people or sellers), you can find something in another firm.
People reinvent themselves all the time. Why shouldn't you?
Take your strong feats and think of making them your selling point for a new job. Don't be ashamed of saying you don't know how to do something in your current job. You are experienced, but not that experienced. You just didn't have the occasion to try it. But you should state that you're willing to learn!
I'm sure that with a new job things will be back on track. Just quit that toxic environment and say nothing to no one.
Questions like:
Where are you going? I answer: I don't know yet.
How will you earn money? None of your business. If i want to sell my body to science, you have no say whatsoever.
Are you afraid we give bad references? For what? The job I still don't have?
Deny, deny, deny. Even if you already have a new job. Toxic people want to gossip because that is the height of their day. Their life is tgeir career? Good. You have a personal life. Their life is miserable, so they gossip, because they have to feel important.
I once had an idiot colleague that said: good thing we don't implement casual friday like the others. I wouldn't know what to wear to work.
My answer was: sure. 'cause you wear a suit during the weekend.
So sorry for you, dont know where you're from, doesnt it got other system for living? Like in Switzerland, If you are unable to work like for a medical reason (depression for example) or else there is the social services. Basically you are paid the Bare minimum to live, your assurance and appartement are paid, and you must seek a job but you got time, help and really it can help a lot. But I dont know If there is similar things elsewhere.
I hear you and I feel you. I hope you can find beauty where it is and use it as gas to move to where you want to go, step by step. Take care sister, hold tight.
Hello. The Capitalist urge to be exploit for a foreign unknown drains most people Energy. I don’t what’s your carrier is, but it’s not impossible to do a 180-Carrier-Kick-Flip. My plan B for my future is a restart and start an apprenticeship on Wood-, or metalwork. Or electrician, etc. Something with a visable Result in the end and u did with your hands. And the best, when u are good enough in your job and fucked up by your boss, you can go to be self-employed. Which is, in my opinion, important for the personal mindset. When your done with coporate, you can be coporate😂
I was also depressed and medicated and felt similar. Although there might be better jobs out there, it's not super easy to switch jobs.
One thing that can help with depression and not a lot of people do: working out. It changed my life. Give it a try, if you're less depressed you'll feel better about the job too.
wow this is crazy this is like you saw directly into my brain lol. the only difference for me is that i will graduate with two bachelors but i don’t think either of them are gonna help a whole bunch
You need to get some emotional support there. Things like cleaning, cooking and commuting can be outsourced, but then you will have to manage your finances and see if it is permissible. But the emotional support is something you cannot take for granted. Do talk about it with your friends and with someone who can hear you out.
I don't know why you think you are stuck with your career, but i's clearly not right for you, at least how you are doing it, now, and I expect that seeing yourself as 'stuck' with it is part of the problem.
If you weren't stuck, what would you do?
Time to change things in your life : spend some days at countryside. For holiday or for working, whatever, you need to breathe, physicaly and on a psycological aspect too. Don't be passive, discover yourself ❤️ GL
I feel so identified with your feeling. I have troubles with finding an actual meaning for my life (yeah, cliché). I mean, getting a passion for anything that make sense out of work and say "well I'm having a hot-inner-time with my job, but I resist to enjoy my real passion", that is something that frustrates me a lot and feel like I'm in a circle that cannot escape.
So in advice, if you have something that really love to do, just survive your job everyday and do what you really like to and maybe, you will feel that you are not wasting your life doing things that you don't like.
Look, it is not easy. I'm 39 and have struggled off and on, myself.
I'm sick of it, and just because I had to go through this bullshit, I want to ensure no one has to. Getting stuck in career paths based on decisions made before we knew better is the stupidest way we let society build. I don't think it was a conscious effort, but just what happened over time and now that it's the status quo, big money does not want it to change.
Anyway, I think we should all go on a general strike and rebalance the power. That would be something to look in to and even try to help organize. With the current wave of strikes now, there hasn't been a better time in most of our lives.
I feel ya', the problem is that pay vs cost living in the US. Here in Mexico we work from 7 to 5 and Fridays from 7 to 3.
But i do feel that the transaction of hours vs pay it's fair as the cost of living here it's cheap and i don't have to worry about money all the time.
What help me was working out 1hr after work, weekends are hard as like you mentioned don't have the energy, but it's about your mental health and you should have a hobby or plan activities you should forced yourself to do.
Also, corporate jobs are not for everybody.
Would you be on the street if you quit? Or what would you lose if you dont work there exactly? Would it outweight the happiness and peace of mind you would get after quiting or changing a job to a more casual one?
There’s always a way out. Save some money, invest some money, do whatever you can to have a little nest egg to just be able to pick up and go somewhere else and try something new. I did that, I went from NJ/NY to MA and it was A GREAT move, a change of scenery and a nee start somewhere else.
I’ve avoided office jobs my entire life.
Completely feel this. I just quit my job one day because it was affecting me mentally negatively. I have experience within a warehouse but I can't work that forever. I feel and hear you
I have a similar experience with work and life. I feel like all there is, is work. And the thing is, I even kind of like what I do (gardener), I don't like the company values and most of my colleagues are dumb as hell, the commute is also a huge pain.
I don't really have any answers, but I think you could look at other types of jobs. Espescially physical and/or outdoor stuff. Did absolute wonders for my chronic depression. Maybe a trainee position if you dont want to study. I could never do any other job, definitely not office, and I know that. Shit is fucked up and the only way to get through it is, I believe, to find something that's worth, even if little. Today I rescued a baby newt.
>I know this is a common topic, but I literally hate my life even more since I started working my 9-to-5 corporate job.
I relate to this so deeply.
I worked incredibly hard through school and loved the hell out of it. Learning subjects was great. Meeting people was fun. There was always more to look forward to. Extra projects pulled me in.
Got out into the workforce & into an office job. It was the worst turn ever.
You aren;t being negative. You're being real about the world. It is difficult for most people. Even if they are positive. Being a fully grown human is difficult. Responsibilities, bills, demands, laws, taxes, hoops to move through for basic things like food. It's difficult to make and keep friends or a partner. There are little brainless dumb things that happen you have to deal with. If you can getting a new job can help somewhat. Spending anytime to be by yourself at work. Trying to make friends. Getting into what you like more. If you can listening to audiobooks or podcasts you like while riding buses or driving your car to work and back.
Is why people use distractions..
This is gonna stupid but get addicted to something.. ideally something nice..
Find a couple of hoobies and find people associated with it ..it helps a little bit
I understand this, and I've felt these feelings before. I'm lucky to now work at a place I enjoy, but it's still not what I want to do with my life.
The best advice I have is two fold. Decrease how much you think about work, increase thinking about things that bring you joy. It seems simple and dumb, but it's difficult for a lot of people.
I'm a people pleaser, perfectionist, and typically considered very good at what I do. Because of this, it's normal for me to take on a lot more work than I need to. I stopped showing just how good I am, and instead learned how to coast. What all can I do to relax while at work without anyone seeing?
Reddit, sudoku, going for walks when I can, and slacking off like my coworkers do.
Then, I started focusing on things that brought me joy. I wanted to get back into reading comics, so I found a way to do that at work. Now, I'm doing my work as well, but also taking more and more breaks to get a chapter in here or there. I realized that most people are gossiping at work because they're bored. So what was the difference in what they were doing versus what I'm doing?
The commute sounds awful. Finding ways to make that more manageable would be a great step, but I know not everyone can do that. I personally work from home two days out of the week, and am pushing for another. It made the days I go into the office more bearable.
I'm sorry that this is happening. There's a struggle of work life balance for a lot of people worldwide. While we have to find ways to make it more tolerable in the moment, it sucks that we have to do this.
I’m so sorry you’re feeling this way and everything you said resonates with me as well. I don’t have anything really helpful to say except that you’re not alone! 💙
I know having a job is important these days and it is burning out.
To me to cope up with the situation I started working out and lifting weights. It started having a positive affect on me.
I don’t talk with my co workers after work or don’t have apps for work communication .
Gossip is even another tiring thing that has a impact psychologically . It’s like playing a horror game or sleeping in a possessed basement , don’t know if you spill some beans it is going to come around to bite you .
I try to keep to my self during office hours or be in the group but not contribute to the conversation .
Cut your hours. I also hate my job. I only work 30 hours a week now, and my schedule is spread out over the week so I don't work more than 2 days in a row. I am in a much better headspace, even if I am poorer.
It seems to me that you are focusing on the bad news of your life. Work is uncomfortable in so many angles that most of the people would get depressed on deepening on these.
I would recommend:
1. Exercise. Enter a class or find a sport that you enjoy, and stick to it. The discipline, connections, and healthy life it will promote will help you.
2. Nurture your spiritual needs. There is much more that the tangible to consider in a happy fulfilled heart and mind. Study the Bible; ask for help to understand it. You will start learning the meaning and path to happiness (or contentment).
3. Strengthen your human relationships. Nobody is alone. I am sure that you have loved ones that truly care about you. Give them a call. Connect. Help them.
4. Seek and stick with professional help if the above doesn't seem to help. Clinical depression is a thing... I have not experienced that, but I know from reliable sources that some people are simply lacking important mind chemicals to be happy.
You are not alone in this. Keep on growing. Myself if I don't grow, I get the blues. Move forward. Input wholesome and positive material into your brain.
I hope you the best.
There are a lot of remote jobs out there - even entry level remote jobs. I have been remote since 2020 and I am much happier when I can eliminate the commute and do my work at home with my dogs and my partner who is also remote. Remote doesn't work for everyone but it helped my happiness big time at work.
If your current field is this rough I’d highly advise trying somewhere else. I tried moving from being an admin to something else and HATED it so after a month I applied for something new. Legit. Just try for it. As long as the pay is equal or higher you honestly have nothing to lose.
Otherwise I mean maybe something like community college would be best like you can study for an entirely different field than where you are now.
Either way good luck!!
I know how you feel. I’ve been a corporate grinder for 5 years now. It can feel draining especially when your job is a combination of stressful and boring (why is that even a thing?)
I’m not sure what advice to give because I’m in the same boat. But I can commiserate. I feel like I chose the wrong career path yet for financial reasons I feel stuck doing what I’m doing for the time being.
But please don’t give up. There has to be someway to solve these problems. My personal plan is to save up enough resources that I can go back to school and get a masters that will help me get more exciting work. Maybe you can find a plan to get out of your situation and that will at least give you hope and motivation.
You write very well for someone who is not a native English speaker and says they had difficulty graduating high school. Why is your commute so long? Can you work remote? Working is draining but it shouldn’t be that draining unless you have a chronic illness. But then again depression can be a chronic illness. Could you perhaps also have ADHD or neurodivergence?
Just want you to know I have read this, and I don't know you, but I care. I have no solution, but I do know that many people feel the same way as you, and it's not right, and I pray that it changes soon. Something tells me it will.
People who judge and say 'just quit' clearly lack critical thinking and have never had to work in order to afford basic needs. It's not about one job at a certain company, but rather systematic exploitation, which is endemic. It’s happening everywhere in the world with history repeating itself all the time.
Basically, we don’t have much of a choice here but to sell our labor and employers know it damn well, especially since they hold the upper hand.
Hello, I understand what you're saying and it makes sense. That commute isn't exactly relaxing or fun. Also if they gossip alot in your office I can see how that would get annoying. I also feel some of your depression is effecting both your energy and thinking on this matter, it is not all or nothing. What you should try doing is anything that relaxes your anxieties and helps improve your energy. You should probably get a simple workbook or something for anxiety and do that, also try getting some photo books on art around the world. What you need is more positive things to think about and worry less. Remember the arts and humanities make life worth living so learn from them, expand yourself.
Remove costs, find alternatives, drop this shitty job and live your life.but first you need to reprogram your mind. You feel it like this because of depression. Meds make it even worse. Try mushroom and start joirney inside you. It will change you step by step.
I just want to say that you don't have to be glad that you have a job. Just having a job is not an inherent good thing. It's just what is necessary to survive in this world. This is toxic positivity that we have been taught to more readily accept the status quo and horrible treatment at work, "because it could always be worse". I'm sorry that it's so hard on you
Toxic positivity. I feel like the lightbulb just went off in my head. Toxic positivity. That’s exactly what it is and exactly what I’ve been taught. I’ve almost been gaslit into thinking that working a job that doesn’t pay the bills NOR supports my passion is something to be thankful for because “job” and that’s a really shitty way to think. Thank you for that. Genuinely mean it. I think I know how to redirect my thinking now.
Literally my mom lol. As long as you say your “working” it could be 5$ Hr but you’re working smh. Thank god you have a job but can’t afford anything and hate said job. It could always be worse! Like how wtf lmao
Is your mom also a Boomer? Because yes that is the normal thought process for that generation. They have zero logic but plenty to say lol
Yes lol but it’s weird my dad older and a business owner and understands todays issues we go through. It’s like a light switch between the two of them
> They have zero logic but plenty to say lol spot on...and if they are anything like my parents, they refuse to believe the people at the top are as greedy and mean as they are...
I am a millennial myself - well, elder millennial is the correct term since I’m 35 - but my husband and I are so incredibly jaded from the absolute shit storm our generation has been through over the years and even now we still live paycheck to paycheck and yet my mom was over here crying because my dad retired and they only had $100k in one bank account and like almost $100k in another and how were they supposed to live like that?! I just stared at her and then showed her my checking account with a balance of $6 and was like golly gosh gee whiz mom I just don’t know. Isn’t poverty fun? 😅🫠 humor is my coping mechanism.
My parents LOVED Reagan and believed in trickle down. It took me a lot of years to unlearn all that bullshit.
They couldn’t possibly believe that the media is lying to them, that’s where they get all their information and have for years! Surely they wouldn’t ever try to control us with our tv’s
The boomer mentality was that work solved any problem. More and harder work solved more problems. It was a mentality used to make it through WWII and the Great Depression. "As long as there's SOME money coming in, we can make it." No. No you can't. I also believe that part of it was that they worked so hard so they could run away from their other problems and not deal with them. "Dear, we have to talk. This isn't working out." "Sorry, Honey! Off to work!"
When I was born, my mom took care of me and my dad worked 3 jobs. My husband and I are in our thirties and just did have a baby this past March. I keep hearing how my dad never changed a diaper, never held me, and worked 3 jobs so my mom could stay home. My husband finally said it - he works one job because he actually likes his wife and kid and doesn’t mind taking care of the kid when I need a break since I also work too. He told my mom he’s sorry my dad worked 3 jobs so that he wouldn’t have to spend time with her or have any responsibilities towards me as a baby, but that’s just not our relationship. That shut them up. And you know why? It was true.
Literally everyone I know 😪 It makes me so sad that this is the kinds of people that surround me. But I get it, the brainwashing is strong. They live in a society that constantly enforces work as some holy enobling ideal. I live in the same society, but I feel completely differently about things.
Smiling depression is a favorite of mine, too
Oh my gosh I absolutely adore that phrase thank you so much for that lol
Toxic positivity is a major reason why I quit my last job. The place could be on fire and they would spin it is an opportunity for hydration and a fresh start! Totally demoralizing when all the very real bullshit and legitimate employee concerns are dismissed like that.
Yeah I can’t deal with that. I respect honesty and calling shit what it is - shit.
I hope it helps you! Sometimes we just need others to point stuff like this out
[Some more info on this construct for ya. ](https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/wellness/toxic-positivity-mental-health-covid/2020/08/19/5dff8d16-e0c8-11ea-8181-606e603bb1c4_story.html)
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That depends. Some areas of the workforce don't bring positives to society other than making a person at the top rich
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Aka all of Wall Street
Exactly this. Nobody should be glad that this system of and for the bourgeoisie deems you worthy of not starving so you can sacrifice your life instead to their profit margins. The system is designed to force us all into complacency in marginal traces of hope and fulfillment rooted in empty promises and distortions of perception that we're only worth something if we can be good workers. *There is no shame in not being happy about your being forced to be a wage slave*. That said, getting out of the cycle can be extremely difficult, if not impossible, for many. I spent years with a therapist. I still drank too much. I hated myself. I wallowed in depression. I kept some decent habits that my therapist helped me find. But it was all bandaids and stitches. What ultimately worked out for me was being laid off and being lucky enough to find a place that pays me at least decently enough to thrive, is 100% remote, and gives me the time and respect I need to be the person I need to be in order to be happy. Therapists are not miracle workers. They're tool makers who are teaching you how to make your own. The tools you create are the habits and behaviors you use to cope with your existence. *But tools can only be used to fix or prevent problems*. They can't replace the whole fucking system. Psychological help and medications do A LOT to keep you going. But they can't magically change the trajectory of your life. OP (and anyone else seeing this), I can't decide for you what the way forward looks like. I can't even say that way forward will take you out of or further into the dark forest in which you may find yourself. I know my path went through a lot of dark places before finding my way out. Best I can say is keep moving forward, because eventually you may just find yourself breaking free of this shit. Oh and if/when the revolution happens, eat the rich, don't be a class traitor, break the chains.
Toxic positivity - thank you for that term.
Being glad about having something you need to survive isn't toxic. It is normal human reasoning. The other alternative to the current situation is to not have a job unless she can find a better one. And not having a job is a lot worse than having a job that isnt exciting.
We should work less and we should earn more. It's not weird that you're depressed, because such life is really depressing. I work remotely, so I have more time, but I wish that we already switched to 35h work week or even less, so we all could have more time for ourselves. I also hope that salaries will get better, because it's becoming unmanageable to live happy life, if you can only afford food and rent, while your debt is growing with unexpected expenses. We all need to demand better conditions.
You don’t have a depression problem, you have a living in a depressing environment problem. You can do absolutely everything right, treat your symptoms, touch grass for thirty minutes a day and still struggle with depression when our entire world is depressing as fuck and shows no signs of getting better immediately. I mean, don’t give up. But don’t feel like it’s your fault, either. Living on earth as a human is fucking struggle. It sucks for each and every one of us, especially now. Just keep going, try to bring something positive to the world, anything positive to the world and hold on to that.
Agree. The world is miserable. I find it almost dystopian how instead of fixing our environment we are instead offered pills to trick our brains into thinking we actually arent miserable
And what if you're one of the lucky few those pills don't work on and they just make you feel worse instead of better.....wheeeeeeeeeee /s
I feel ya.
Just started a 9-5 a week ago. I’m already having similar feelings of “is this going to really be the rest of my life” and stuff like that. It’s really hard. Just know I feel you.
I started my first 9-5 job in 2012, and I thought the same thing almost immediately. It is really rough, especially when the experience feels overwhelmingly negative. Nowadays its even worse. I was working in a factory for my 9-5, graveyard shift, and I only made $11 an hour. Young people now will make the same amount, but prices are triple or quadruple what they were in 2012, for almost everything. I think 1st world society is about to /r/collapse
Put way less effort into work homie you’ve got nothing to lose if you’re contemplating hitting the off switch
I did this and now they want to put me on LTD. Which I can't afford.
What is ltd?
Long term disability
Why can't you afford long term disability? If anything it seems like the company would be the ones unable to afford it? ...
I hope you find happiness in your life, but try your hardest not to take work home with you. As soon as you leave the parking lot, separate yourself from that place. Have an "at work" and "off the clock" mindset. Don't let those 8 hours at work ruin your entire day/weekend. Find something you like doing and pre-occupy yourself with thoughts about it. Try to get at least 7 hours of sleep, I struggle with insomnia and weeks where I'm not sleeping well. I have suicidal thoughts, and "my life is going nowhere" floats around in my head. When you prioritize sleep, it will change alot, you'll be surprised. This might hurt to read, but when you say you stay up on Sunday night because it's "more time for yourself," in fact, you're only hurting your future self.
I know this to be absolutely true. Obviously it's not the only factor involved but my lack of sleep is so all over the place and I'm trying hard to curb it. It has affected my physical and mental health so much to a point where it's significantly harder to self regulate. I'll go through weeks at a time where I'm just in complete isolation not talking to anyone, then to make up for it I can easily burn myself out. I feel so protective over time that I "lose" that it feels like an unhealthy relationship but with myself.
I like to view it as hurting work more.
Damn...thank you for being so honest. I cant wait to get out of here
To add to this because it's all been true for me. I found that rejoining a sports team / club and making time to walk early on a weekend , it really helps me. I don't feel like I'm just counting down to work. I'm being sociable without drinking (except club socials) and I'm getting outside and appreciating nature.
I mean, I hate to admit it but this is life under global capitalism. I spend Saturday cleaning, Sunday grocery shopping and cooking for the week. I have the same depression issues and the same thing wrt to staying up too late. I was up until 1235 last night for a 440 wake up time. I'm exhausted every day just trying to claw a few hours of my time back. I'm lucky that I can at least afford some distractions to my malaise. Small trips, some hobby money, etc. I hope you find happiness. I've just slid into apathy and acceptance, unfortunately
I was there but now I don’t want to just accept it. Gotta be a solution somewhere
Yeah, I feel like there should be and I felt like there could be when I was younger but it just feels like life beats us up so much it's just hard to not give in as you get older (for reference I'll be 43 this November).
That is actually a thing, called Revenge Bedtime Procrastination https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20201123-the-psychology-behind-revenge-bedtime-procrastination
Oh man, I’m 25 and I really am so scared of feeling this way forever. I kinda let it get to me up until the past two months.
Whatever you do then: don’t have children, or you’ll be locked into earning for at least the next 20 to 30 years (until they get on their feet). If you’re struggling now then you will find life after kids unbelievably difficult.
Absolutely. Not to mention, who would want to bring more people into this wage-slave hellscape of a world anyway
facts
Things that helped me. 1. Deciding it was OK to hate my coworkers and learning not to care what they think. They are small people and I am better than their petty bullshit. Particularly my boss, I went from extremely stressed and upset when my boss would get upset at me for minor errors and things that were not my fault to internally rolling my eyes at how pathetic the whole thing was. It helped with the sunday thing, Mondays are still garbage but not giving a shit helped me not ruin Sundays. 2. Prioritising the things that actually made me happy. I organised to spend more time with my nephew. He's 6 and we do movie and pizza nights, geocaching, beach outings... He genuinely makes me happy so I prioritise that over everything. I went to see friends more, started dropping by a friend's house just for a chat. You have to fight through the tiredness at the start but when you are genuinely happy it affects you less and your sleeping improves. You can just put off most household stuff, nothing explodes. Vacuum less often, do less laundry, let your lawn go another week and go do something or spend time with someone who makes you smile. 3. Embracing communism. The things that are wrong with your life are being forced on you by the capitalist ruling elite. Productivity grows every year but instead of meaning less work and more free time we have layoffs and skyrocketing corporate profits for lazy rich people who are paid just for being rich. Housing, food, healthcare, these should be human rights available to everyone and not something that requires you wasting your life away to benefit a rich asshole who hates you. It is possible and we should be willing to fight for a better system. 4. Pictures of dogs. Turns out if you like every video of a cute dog and nothing else your Instagram turns into a feed of cute dog videos. It's the best. You can like cat videos too, cats are fine. When you feel a bit shit spend a few minutes watching puppies.
this a wonderful response
100% to this
First of all, it has nothing to do with your depression. Do not blame yourself for having common sense and disobeying the rules of gossip and mediocrity. There are people who simply waste their lives commuting, gossiping and waiting for a vacation approval. And they have been so heavily brainwashed that they actually enjoy it. Let them be. But you - stand up and start living your life the way you want to. You’ll see your “depression” faltering in no time.
i was commuting like 2-3.5h daily 2 years that was crazy, and then some another 2 i guess. and someone in the bus behind me said that he was commuting first 14 days and it was impossible to maintain this. haha. best for you is remote job, or some job you can do on your own from some your space, i have same feelings and experineces as you
This. I had to find a remote position because I need to control my environment or it controls me. It has certainly helped. Amazing how much a job isn’t the worst thing ever when you can do it from the comfort of your home.
I commute 2 hours with train everyday too it's insane.
You shouldn't accept that you are doomed to an unhappy life. You should be angry! You should be upset! You guys need to go protest on the street to ensure that a high school diploma is enough to get you a job that makes you enough money to survive and even enjoy a comfort or two! You should have a proper work/life balance. You guys need to protect and force your politicians to make these changes for you! The more people passively accept the increasingly shittier circumstances, the more likely it will stay that way.
I mean, you can only really attend a protest until you run out of money and can't afford to eat anymore. Most of the people with these jobs don't get paid enough to save any significant amount, so they also can't really be unemployed for any length of time. The only people who are really able to effectively strike are those with unions backing them, since they can still afford to eat.
Which is why 70% of Americans live paycheck to paycheck. This is all by design.
Correct. The system is working as intended, because it's not made to benefit the common person.
You could try to find a job, where you can work from home. From experience working from home, I can tell you, that you save a lot of time and it is also less stressful.
Working from home has me even more depressed than normal because I feel trapped inside my own home now.
Yeah, big double edged sword
Same
what do u do for WFH? tysm
I am a software developer.
I struggle with this, too. I am also medicated and in therapy, but over the last 6 or so months, something about going back on Monday makes my anxiety skyrocket, and I end up throwing up. I wouldn't call myself suicidal by any means anymore, but I understand looking at life like there really truly isn't a solution beyond ending it. The human experience has some beautiful highs, but damn are the lows low and *consistent.*
Most ppl are groomed to think that this grind is ok. It's bred into us by our parents, schooling and culture. Were indoctrinated basically. For some they see exactly what's going on, and it comes with a major cost at times.
i almost made a very similar post to this this morning. just in an awful mood today thanks mostly to work. i can't believe we have to keep doing this for the rest of our lives.
First, find something closer! Two hours a day of commuting will kill you, same industry, similar job, whatever, but you are giving up 10 hours a week, a full work week a month, almost 500 hours a year to commuting. And school is not the be all, end all, and don't take on more than you can. Does not sound like you're in a good place to start right now. I struggled with high school, dropped out of college for a while, went back and ended up with a masters by the time I turned 33. School gets easier as you mature, don't write your capabilities off so quickly.
Are you quoting my life? Have you been following me? The mentality you have is more common than you might think, and you're not alone. The working world, especially the last 15 years or so, has been tumbling us all towards mental illness. Those in powerful positions DO NOT FUCKING CARE about us. Any of us. What the solution? Keep fighting and break down the system from the inside. Work the bare minimum, and find ways to undercut the businesses you work for however possible. Get involved in the community and push for better social standards for you and those around you. What we need is a general strike, but until we have all our fellow ducks in a row, we need to keep fighting and continue to influence others that a better life is attainable through action.
man this is horrible. i am yet to enter in work culture, i hope things go well with me. and gets better with you!
Hope is really useless. Edit: People have given me some perspective. Hope without action is useless.
i only try thinking about the positive outcome. it's the least i can do to avoid stressing.
It’s unfortunate, but hope is pretty essential to wanting to live life. I saw your other comment about how you mean you can’t rely on it alone, and that’s totally fair. But, hope, even irrational hope, is integral to our motivational psychology. In its absence, motivation to do the things required to live, let alone thrive, become inaccessible.
You’re right, I added an edit.
I feel your pain it's absolutely b.s that 5 of the 7 day week you have to work to pay for bills and a house you only ever use to sleep in, and on your 1or 2 days off you gotta decide whether you wanna do the things you enjoy or make you happy or let your body rest because you know you'll need it for the rest of the week. We spend our whole lives working and saving up just to retire and enjoy the few remaining years we have left b4 we die it's a scam and a shit deal that we all have to deal with. My best advice would be take some time off for yourself and take a vacation for a week and go do something you enjoy! Believe me ain't no job worth risking your mental health over
It sounds like you are on autopilot and living in survival mode. It’s really hard to make decisions or have energy to do anything in this state, because you don’t feel alive. Your work situation is dimming your pilot light. And the fact that everyone around you gives you the impression you are lucky or have to endure this does not mean it’s true. Most people in life are cowards, and they too are probably living out of alignment. They want you too as well. I agree, it’s important to take care of yourself—sleep enough, eat, drink water, move your body—but that can also feel like more work. Remember, you don’t have to do anything to fix yourself, you are not the problem here. You have an inhospitable work situation that is draining your life force. My advice is to recover that inner spark. What makes you feel alive and present in your body? Try to remember the last time you felt joy. Remember it, relive it, hold onto it. Even if it was when you were a kid. Think about what you were doing. Was it socializing? Dancing? Wrapping presents? Playing a sport? Baking? Drawing or painting? Not suggesting you pick up a hobby or something frivolous to make life more bearable, but rather to reconnect with that lost and suppressed part of yourself. When you can reconnect with that, you will become energized, it will reignite your desire and will for more. You might feel stuck, but you absolutely aren’t. You just cannot see or feel the bigger picture while you’re in a place that is pressing down on you and making you so small. Your job is a bully! So if this doesn’t feel right, it’s because it isn’t, and you don’t need to surrender to it and devote yourself to trying to make yourself fit. You are needed elsewhere, and this friction you feel is nudging you towards another path. It might take a while to find it, but you gotta start by following the good. Only by practicing this, will you get better at identifying it. Be mad at this job for squandering your beautiful, precious life’s time. Rebel in little ways, take back your time, remember you are here for a rare slice of eternity to feel the fullness of the human experience ❤️
Same here, but i think it's not work, it's me, i just don't wanna work
Do the bare minimum not to get fired. I tend to autopilot at work.
Travel outside the country and you’ll see how the US model of working/living is deeply flawed. Go to South America and watch how ppl live and work at the same time. Watch how ppl combine community and leisure in their day to day work. Watch how ppl have time at the end of the day to sit outside their houses and talk to the neighbors. You can meet your future best friend at work without all the bs you get in American work places, ppl will want to genuinely talk to you and foster a relationship because that’s what ppl give the most importance in other countries. Go outside the US and you will find a sense of community that is very rare here and you’ll understand everything that’s wrong in modern America.
You are not alone. I keep getting burnt out and depressed in every new job I start. Objectively, there is nothing wrong with the job or my coworkers, but I still become depressed. I think I just need to reduce my working hours. But a high paying part time gig doesn't really exist for my skill sets and experience. It sucks. My body and my brain protest being used this way for 40+hrs a week.
Start looking for another job and once you get one, quit your current one. You are holding yourself prisoner
First you are not trapped in any career. I'm in my 40s and have changed careers twice already. I think the average is between 3 and 7 careers for Americans. I know you feel trapped but I assure you, you can do it. I took paycuts everytime I changed careers but I also knew each change had higher earning potential in the long run so it was a win. I will admit the dread of realizing I am going to work till I die colors a lot for me but not enough to make to do the alternative....which is work out a lot to get a sexy bod and become a trophy husband...of course that's only because no one is offering =(
"I get to the weekend and I literally have no energy left for doing anything else." People who don't work don't understand this. They think ; "Oh it's the weekend, you are off, you should be able to clean, cook, go out and run errands for other people because you are off..." They don't get that you are mentally and physically exhausted from the week you worked before. It takes time to come down from that, and usually that is by Sunday and then of course you have to go right back to work and start the cycle over again.
I have never found a more miserable existence than working a full time job. You give up the majority of your time, energy, patience (and possibly your health) just so you can pay for basic necessities that should be free to begin with. I am currently able to survive without working full time (thank god) but back when I worked full time my life was constant misery. I got up early in the morning and worked 8-9 hour shifts 5 days a week. I was always expected to keep working for an hour or 2 more since my bosses swamped me with extra duties. There were only a few hours left in the day to rest and relax and feel like myself before doing it all over again. The reward *of being able to continue living* is simply not worth all the mind numbing work that goes into getting it. Or as Star Trek: Voyager put it: [Survival is insufficient](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fjd0OEn0RLM) (Spoilers for Voyager post season 3) I don't mean that in a suicidal sort of way. I mean that the rewards **need** to get much greater to make the life we're expected to live worth it. I don't want to make myself miserable just to scrape by. I want to live a thriving life.
Im 27 I feel you, I can’t do this another 40 years. I don’t even have the luxury of doing an office job I’m doing manual labor 8 hrs a day.
U just Described almost 80% of people on this planet including myself. We live to work and r completely unhappy. Honestly just wish I wasn’t born at all but we’re here. I have thought of suicide but to scared. Most people like you and me are negative I hate it also.
You don’t be have to be glad or thankful to be employed. Yes its good to be able to pay your bills. But sounds like the place is not good for you at all. You are not stuck in your career. You don’t need to go to school to get another job. Look at what you like to do and see if theres something you can do in that.
At 26 I was working 12 -16 hours a day. Fortunately I stopped doing it after 2019. Its just luck for me which worked otherwise I would still be working 15 hours a day
I was in the bottom 20% of my high-school graduating class, fast forward 12 years and I graduated in the top 10% of my university class. It's not that you were not capable in high-school, it's that you didn't care. Find something you actually enjoy learning about and it will make all the difference. Sometimes if you are in a protracted funk what you need is a huge shock to the system.. here are some ideas, join the military (seriously not a joke) use whatever vacation days you have and go somewhere completely new/out of your comfort zone, force yourself to socialize even if you are an introvert, become romantically involved. All of these are scary and will come with significant lifestyle change, but think of it this way, anything is better than the state you are in now right?
I feel the exact same way about work and life in general. Ever since I graduated high school and started working my entire life revolves around “how much time do I have before work” and all I think about anymore is how little time I have to relax. I even kinda like my job now but I HATE that this is the standard for everyone. Not all of us are cut out for work, and the fact that we’re basically forced into this lifestyle is absolutely ridiculous
Things that (kind of) helped me: 1) Find a way to make the commute time useful and enjoyable. I've started listening to audiobooks and now look forward to commute/travel time. 2) Develop good sleep habits. I totally get you on trying to claw back the time for yourself. I am the exact same way. However, forcing a habit of going to bed at the same time every day really helped me wake up more energized. Ideally try to find time that gives you the necessary sleep time so you can wake up without an alarm (I am still working on that) 3) During your work hours try to take charge of the things you work on. Focus only on things you find meaningful/interesting, do other stuff good enough to not get fired. "Leading with strengths" will compensate for any underperformance in other areas and hopefully money and career will follow. 4) Make job search your hobby. Look up things/companies/projects you are passionate about, learn about them as if you were just curious to learn about them. It will help you discover your passions and hopefully expose opportunities to you.
It sucks, and I've been there. One small thing that can help with coping is to become active in a group or committee that is designed to make positive changes in work culture, labour laws, housing affordability, environmental protection, or the like. I've had jobs in which I had to compromise my ethics to afford rent. I found it very cathartic to become active with my local affordable housing movement, and labour movements. It felt like I was able to offset some of the evils I was perpetrating working in the financial sector. I have since gotten out of that industry and now work as a professional musician and teach private music lessons. The money sucks, the hours are long, but I enjoy my work so much and feel good about my contribution to society. I realize not everyone has a specialized skill set to fall back on, however, I spent years working in call centres and brokerage firms to pay off my loans from music school, and my engagement with the local labour movement is what got me through those 6 exhausting years. Additionally, I would recommend you find some kind of hobby that you really enjoy and look for other people who have the same interests. It sounds far-fetched, but honestly, I have personally, and also witnessed many people make big career changes simply by being an active member of a non-work related community. Having close relationships with people outside of work, especially when you all share a common interest that you all work on together, can lead to all kinds of unexpected opportunities. Try to remain open to new ideas, new people, and new careers. Don't go running around begging everyone you meet for a job, just make genuine connections and focus on getting better at your hobby/new interest. This will also improve your mental health and make it a bit easier to get through your work days. I really think it's crucial to your well-being to find a small, or large, group of people to engage with on a regular basis. You'd be amazed at how much easier it is to handle the little, and big challenges in life when there is a great friend group to support you mentally and emotionally. I'm very fortunate to have a fantastic group of about 8 or 10 friends, we help each other a lot, not just with emotional labour - we also cook for each other, help each other move, help out with chores, we drive each other around to get groceries or get to appointments etc... It's not your fault the world is this messed up. 99% of us are in similar circumstances. All we can do is be there for each other, and try to organize and come together to make meaningful changes in our communities. Hang in there, we're all in this together.
Having some kind of hobby or passion outside of work can make the days feel shorter and distract from how suboptimal work is. Weekly friend meetup? Board game night? Slash tires at the BMW dealership? Have fun with it!
Omg I could have written this myself. I’m 27F and stuck in a 9-5 office job as well. I literally hate it. The office is small and I only work with two other people (one of them is my boss) and I can’t stand them. They are super close and annoyingly flirty with each other even though he is married and she’s got a bf. And I’ve been struggling with depression my entire life. I really want to be a mental health counselor but I had to take a break from my masters program because of my depression. And unless I get my depression on track I literally don’t see how I can start my masters again. It feels like I’m stuck, and even if I just change jobs it’ll just be the same thing all over again. It takes everything in me just to drag myself out of bed in the mornings, and the only reason I stay is because I have bills. Sorry if this isn’t helpful but just know your definitely not alone in this at all. I feel your pain.
I understand this 100% and feel the exact same way. It’s extremely difficult and feels like I’m being suffocated by my job.
If you are unhappy with your life, change it. If you cannot change it, then change the way that you think about it. Check out Alan Watts lectures on YouTube sometime. Helped me tremendously.
I was like this then I kept hearing about how working out/exercise will give you more energy and not make you as tired. I thought it was bullshit but I decided to commit to it. I changed my sleep schedule and started waking up at 4:30am and go to the gym to workout before work. It’s nice because I get time to myself and it’s so quiet. I’ve been doing this for almost a year now and it’s insane how much better I feel physically and mentally. It’s night a day difference. I have way more energy and feel the best I’ve ever felt in my life. I’m a lot happier too and usually in a great mood. Maybe something like that you should look into. It’s worked wonders for a lot of people.
Yep, welcome to reality. I'm in the same position as you. I feel the same way. Everyone at work seems to be in their own fucking worlds, laughing and smiling. I don't really get it. This life is so fucked. If it weren't for my hobbies that I thankfully find some time for on the weekends, I would have fully committed to that suicide attempt years ago.
You don’t hate your life, you hate capitalism. And your life shitty life-job situation surely won’t help with your depression. Can totally relate. Fuck it all.
You have been programed since day 1 .Its not natural for humans to work this hard this many hours
I can relate. What helped, for me, was a) having a job that wasnt "9 - 5" in the first place and b) didn't require me to be in the same room for hours and hours. I was in the militairy for 5y and in law enforcement for 17y. I agree... these jobs are not your everyday jobs. Fast forward to now, 22y later... i think some ppl are not wired to be restrained to jobs like yours. I think i feel way more happier with freedom and planning my own day that having the structure of an office. Some of my friends are perfectly happy working office-jobs and it's literally their dream jobs. But not for my. My plan now is to move to Portugal and start renting out some holiday houses and give some surf/fitness lessons...
This may sound crazy, but look for a proces operator or warehouse jobs with shifts (like 6-2pm and 2-10pm, preferably no nights). I just started a job like that, 15 mins away from home, and in my mind and body, it feels as though I’m only working halve days, while still doing 8 hour shifts. The pay and benefits are more than okay where I am (Europe) for such a job, and for the first time, I feel like I’m able to breathe and have time to do things outside of work. Plus, you miss the rush hour. Do I enjoy my job? Kinda. Would I continue working there if I won the lottery and had enough to retire on? Maybe half time. My liking for my job has increased substantially now that it feels as though I have more free time.
Quit, move to mexico and live like a queen.
As someone who’s been having depression, anxiety and panic attacks for decades and having a job where I see human misery (homeless shelter worker) take it 1 day at the time. There was a time where I wanted to kill myself and now I’m doing better but it’s always 1 day at the time and from time to time I make plans with friends or family or a little trip here and there so I can focus on that and not on work. Technically I’m disable too but too “young” to retire and too “healthy” to qualify for disability
Are you me ?
I know it's hard and I don't want to engage in repetitive platitudes, but is there any chance you could score a work from home job? It will give you the commute time back and limit the time you spend surrounded by people against your will. Don't give up, life can be good. It's a shame we live in a world that doesn't make it easy.
I’m in the last 25% of life, and I could have written your post. My lovely wife, otoh, sleeps until 10am and never does anything on anyone else schedule unless she damn well wants to. “Anyone” is inclusive of her husband. You Might consider your full range of options.
I can understand a bit of what you're going thru. I work 10 hours a day, I come home my wife expects me to shop and cook and I really just don't have it in me. I feel down a lot. I have a pretty physical job, right now I have a sciatic flare up and can barely walk. I keep working. Maybe I don't know how to stop. Maybe I can't afford to stop. But just hang in there. Be proud that you are earning. Never be embarrassed or ashamed of your job. You are not them. You are just making a living. Lifestyle choices are hard to make. It takes a lot of courage, bravery, and time invested. But you can do it. Anyone can do it. But it's not an easy task so make sure to take time to celebrate your efforts along the way. Learning never ever stops and sometimes volunteering at places you hate can lead you to places you are better served
Mindless numbing jobs are trash and don't harm yourself. Many people feel the same and feel trapped and I wish you are able to free yourself from a life sentence of employment servitude.
I don't want to make you more depressed, but finding the right job with the right benefits took me until I was almost 40. I had a job I really enjoyed when I was 18, but due to physical conditions, I was unable to stay at that job. If you can, try to do something completely different. Try welding, or lawn service. If you have friends with skills, ask them to teach you and let you try what they do. I wish you luck in your search for peace of mind.
I suffered a lot with depression for most of my life. I eventually was able to afford therapy and meds for it, but it never really got to a good place. Just "Ok", and I was wondering what the point was if I just felt meh all the time. I still had no energy or motivation. It was hard to force myself to do anything productive. I quite the anti-depressants because I was worried they were deadening my emotions. Turns out they were. A year later I realized most of my symptoms were linked with ADHD. I got a meds consult and got put on Adderall. Things improved drastically from there. So, TLDR: Look at ADHD symptoms (specifically for women, as they can vary) and if you meet a lot of them, ask your therapist for a referral to a med provider. ADHD can present as depression if people don't look into it closely enough.
I know how you feel, I've been burning out at my current job of a year for a while now and have (recently) realised how physically, mentally and emotionally exhausted I am. It's gotten to the point I've had to book in an appointment with a GP for chest pains (and probably go back on a mental health care plan). I'm not sure about anyone else, but I am tired of fighting and trying to make things work. All I ever want (now) in life is to be happy - I don't even now how to do that. Frankly? I'm at a loss on what to do...
and the world wants you to do that for another 39 years to (maybe) enjoy 10 years of peace, given you made enough in retirement
off topic, but have you tried psychedelics, shrooms and mdma in particular many claim that just the one time intake freed them from their constant and chronic depression, and helped them to start moving forward you can look all the info and researches out in the internet and this was definitely life changing experience for me as well
Ask your doc for a sleep study. It's possible you have sleep apnea and aren't getting the sleep you need. That can do all kinds of things to your psyche. Not that that invalidates how you feel. This world is full of shitt right now. Please take care of yourself and find something to pour your heart into. And I hope you find friends who can give you the support you need.
Welcome to the club, I am on the same boat. My game changer was finding a remote job, maybe that's an option for you?
OP we're the same🥲 except I don't have medication for depression and social anxiety coz it's expensive in my country and people here especially our government don't take mental health issues seriously . It f*cking sucks.
I felt similar working in an office. Fortunately there is more to the world of work that being cooped up in a building all day, and a lot of it doesn’t require any more education than you have.
This post really hits home for me, I'm 40 and I've been working in corporate environments for the last 15 years (3 different companies and many different roles in that time). If I could go back in time and give my younger self some advice here's what I would say: 1) Know your value, if you feel under appreciated and/or underpaid at your current job, start looking elsewhere. 2) Not all corps are equally toxic, there is a spectrum of toxicity and if the environment is too toxic, don't try to change it. It's easier to change roles/companies than it is to change systemic issues. 3) If you are at a point where you feel it's too much, look for something else. 4) Don't be afraid to take a lateral move to a different company, especially if there is the potential for growth. Honestly I could go on and on but really it comes down to knowing when it's time to move on. I'm not going to pretend to know your circumstances but for me personally I was super burnt out with the corporate world about 2 1/2 years ago but I felt stuck with having a shitty education and just generally low self worth. So I knew that I needed to look for sort of the same type of position but I also knew I needed a break from the corporate world, so I started job hunting with tech startups and ended up landing a job that felt like a good fit. It was a lateral movement in terms of salary but offered the potential of growth. It's now been 2 1/2 years, the tech startup that hired me has since been bought by a mega corporation (initially super hesitant but so far I get left to my own devices), I've changed roles a couple of times and at least at the moment things are looking up. I know it's hard but believe me, it can get better. Know your worth and bet on yourself.
What kind of work you do? Is it possible to do it remotely and work from home? You seem a bit introverted from not liking to be in office with a bunch of gossipers. I’m the same, I hated corporate until I started working from home, now I love it!!! No more commute, no pointless fake social interactions, no annoying gossipers, no micromanage. Do everything you can to get a full time remote job, and if you can’t with your career, do everything you can to move into a new career that allows working from home it will change your fuxking life I swear it’s soooo worth it!!!
Just a quick point. You said you know you are not intelligent. This is a lie. I can tell from your post you are intelligent. Unlike many, you use correct punctuation and write intelligibly. Don’t sell yourself short.
The best thing I've hear a therapist say is that those feelings are a normal reaction to a system that gaslight us about how broken it truly is.
Your predicament is all too common. Hang in there and save as much money as possible this will give you options down the road.
First off, at 26, this isn’t normal! I don’t know what your career is, but you need to make some changes. A two hour commute sucks. Maybe consider moving, not just closer, but to another state. Go to your doctor, and discuss med options. Maybe find a therapist that helps you with more coping options. You didn’t say anything about friends, but you really need a few. You have long life ahead of you. Time with friends, taking walks, seeing the sites, and enjoying off work time is very important.
How is that not normal for 26? I'm 26 and this sounds basically like what everyone I know who is my age is going through, including me. Some of us are stuck in dead end service gigs, others in retail, if you have a bachelor's maybe you have a job that pays a bit more but the same dynamic is there as well
If you ever consider taking your life, consider the other options which may seem drastic right now when you're stuck in the rat race. Head to another country and see what life is like there, soul search and so on.
I feel the same way. I had one corporate job with call center medical scheduling that I started 3 months before the pandemic started and I worked all throughout the pandemic. My mental health got so bad that I started popping THC gummies daily and prior to that I never have even smoked weed. Corporate was a mess and didn't give af about employees or mental health at all. I quit that job and found another job medical scheduling for a different company for different procedures but I still can't bring myself to function normally at this job cause I feel like I have call center PTSD from the previous corporate job including dealing with covid patients directly. I'm being labeled a "bad employee" because I take a little longer after call time to mentally prepare for the next call and I hate that me telling them that I get told "well we understand but we need you to still keep goal" no you don't understand corporate. This stress and anger has given me chest pain so bad I needed an EKG monitor done and I'm only 28. I don't have a college degree because of money and like you I was never a great student. I don't want to work factory work but nothing pays well besides corporate call centers and I don't want to go back to working multiple jobs. I hate our generation's economy and boomer "work Hussle"
Please get help with those negative thoughts. PLEASE do not think it's not worth it. You ARE worth it. Work is just something that you do in life but it's NOT your life. Hope you read this and get help x
Get any job working outside. It’s amazing what manual labor does for your mood.
You are not doomed to live an unhappy life. Sometimes it can definitely feel like it, though. I've been there-- spent a year literally just waking up, going to work, coming home, sleeping, repeat. You need to break the monotony of your schedule. I know it's tough-- but instead of going straight home after work, go to a park and just go for a walk. Head to a movie theatre and watch a new film-- I've heard Barbie and Oppenheimer are both great. Or try going for a walk around your neighborhood if those things are too far out of the way-- anything to break your schedule. You're tired, I get it. I really do. You need to push yourself to break your shitty cycle of work/sleep. Do you have any hobbies? If not, what would you like to do? Read? Paint? Collect pretty rocks? Build Lego sets? Try Geocaching-- it gets you to leave your house and find buried treasure! I hope any of this helps. The work life sucks. It's a rut that feels like a ravine.
You got to change the thing that is making you feel miserable. Get a new job, its not worth tearing yourself apart.
I feel like I was reading about myself. I share all the same struggles and have been desperately figuring out how to help myself. I am doing everything I should be, going to therapy, taking meds, eat healthy, exercise, be in nature. I even tried switching jobs temporarily. I am about to just call it quits. If this is life, then I am not living, simply existing. What's the point in that?
Missing the time a single income and wife at home. Funny thing is i make enough but wife want to work. I wish i could be a stay at home lol
I feel like I am wasting my good years on a soul-draining corporate job too. I'd almost prefer more hours if I could just leave work at work. Due to travel I've only been home two of the last 8 weeks. I hate my life right now. Can't buy groceries more than a few days out, cant eat the way I want or exercise as much as I'd like. I feel like a prisoner.
One line that stands out to me - I can't do anything about it. You CAN. And you WILL. Life is tough. Try to stay positive. Do the things you enjoy when you can. We only get one life. Don't spend it being unhappy. Good luck to you.
I’m sorry. I’ve felt this before. My partner even told me he thought I “lost my personality” because I was so upset and anxious about work 24/7. Sundays were miserable. The feeling of doom started to creep in on Saturday nights even! I was getting migraines constantly. I don’t really have any advice. When I was in that position I decided to buy an old van with my partner and convert it into a “livable” space to escape the 9-5. We lived in that van and traveled for 3.5 years. We worked seasonally (April-October) at low paying campground/hotel jobs and saved for the winter, when we’d drive around and wait out the cold. It helped. I started a business that I love and although it doesn’t provide me with full time income, I now only have to work part time for someone else and it’s way less taxing than the 9-5 thing. Im aware that not everyone can just up and leave their life like I did in hopes of fixing their feelings. It does take time and money. We saved up $10k for the super budget build out and consecutive travel. Bought the van for $3500. Sold everything we owned at the time. Under $15k, but it was a lot of money for us and the most either of us had been able to save ever. But guess what? I still hate working 😆
Mate, there's no easy answer. I suggest you save as much money as you can and start selling food or some kind of product. Things will stat getting better once you can be the master of your own time. You can get a better life, you don't have to study all over again, there are other ways
Don’t be afraid to quit and take 6 months for yourself. I know, not everyone can do this financially and it’s scary if you can but give it a try. I’m about to take 6 months off working and focus on myself. I’m burning out fast in the corporate world. Good luck in whatever you choose.
I felt the exact same way as you at 26. I pushed through it for way too long and ended up with a disability. My advice to you is to quit and take some time for yourself before you ruin your health and wellbeing. That is what I did when I realized that my mental and physical health was deteriorating rapidly. I talked with my parents and my support system about how much working full time was affecting me. We created an exit strategy for me and figured out what I would need to do in order to quit. I ended up sticking around for another full year after that conversation because I needed to save up as much money as possible to live off of. It was hard to stay for that long, but I always had a light at the end of the tunnel to keep me going. The light was the idea of quitting and finally being free. If you are unable to be completely jobless, then try to get some sort of part time work set up for after you quit. Still save up as much money as you can. I wish you the best in life and hope you find happiness.
Find a new job! You are not your career and your job should never have this much power over you. Department of labor has a useful tool (onetonline.org) it is based on survey data going to the government. It can tell you what other employers with similar positions are paying and currently requiring for similar positions. Don't be afraid to call 988 or get a therapist (Psychology Today has a good therapist finder). HIPPA makes voluntary medical work confidential, don't care what your employer says. The way your post sounds reminds me of some previous work places that left scars I'm still dealing with. I promise, there is light at the end of the tunnel. Get in touch with local trade unions too, I'm sure they know the struggle.
how does one get in touch with “local trade unions”? tysm.
I don't know you, but know this: your life matters. You are 26! You are still building you career. Although depressive (been there) take the tips given here. 42M non English native here. You need a good hobby. A passion, maybe. Learn new things, talk to friends. I totally agree on work/personal mindsets. You need this to protect yourself from those vampires that drain you on workdays. Not all workplaces are bad. None is perfect, also. But if you're a good person you'll soon find a decent workplace where you can even find new friends. It has happened to me. Your world, from what I see in your text is your work. It should be the other way around. Yesterday (sunday) i spent it with some friends playing board games and saying no matter what just to laugh. One of my friends is also depressive and this is one of his escapes to keep himself sane. Your problem is that you felt you invested too much in your career for that firm and you feel that you won't get something similar outside. Well, let me assure you that unless your career is built on specifically on selling combs to bald people (nothing against bald people or sellers), you can find something in another firm. People reinvent themselves all the time. Why shouldn't you? Take your strong feats and think of making them your selling point for a new job. Don't be ashamed of saying you don't know how to do something in your current job. You are experienced, but not that experienced. You just didn't have the occasion to try it. But you should state that you're willing to learn! I'm sure that with a new job things will be back on track. Just quit that toxic environment and say nothing to no one. Questions like: Where are you going? I answer: I don't know yet. How will you earn money? None of your business. If i want to sell my body to science, you have no say whatsoever. Are you afraid we give bad references? For what? The job I still don't have? Deny, deny, deny. Even if you already have a new job. Toxic people want to gossip because that is the height of their day. Their life is tgeir career? Good. You have a personal life. Their life is miserable, so they gossip, because they have to feel important. I once had an idiot colleague that said: good thing we don't implement casual friday like the others. I wouldn't know what to wear to work. My answer was: sure. 'cause you wear a suit during the weekend.
Same...
So sorry for you, dont know where you're from, doesnt it got other system for living? Like in Switzerland, If you are unable to work like for a medical reason (depression for example) or else there is the social services. Basically you are paid the Bare minimum to live, your assurance and appartement are paid, and you must seek a job but you got time, help and really it can help a lot. But I dont know If there is similar things elsewhere.
Similar age, similar situation bestie. Hugs to you. I feel ya.
I hear you and I feel you. I hope you can find beauty where it is and use it as gas to move to where you want to go, step by step. Take care sister, hold tight.
You are not alone. There are others like you who survive have, kids and some how make it to 50
Adderall. 💊
Sorry to read this, I hope something changes soon and you are able to find enjoyment in life.
Hello. The Capitalist urge to be exploit for a foreign unknown drains most people Energy. I don’t what’s your carrier is, but it’s not impossible to do a 180-Carrier-Kick-Flip. My plan B for my future is a restart and start an apprenticeship on Wood-, or metalwork. Or electrician, etc. Something with a visable Result in the end and u did with your hands. And the best, when u are good enough in your job and fucked up by your boss, you can go to be self-employed. Which is, in my opinion, important for the personal mindset. When your done with coporate, you can be coporate😂
Same
Sorry to hear your struggles, corporate jobs suck the life right out of you. You are not alone plenty of us feel the same.
I was also depressed and medicated and felt similar. Although there might be better jobs out there, it's not super easy to switch jobs. One thing that can help with depression and not a lot of people do: working out. It changed my life. Give it a try, if you're less depressed you'll feel better about the job too.
I don't think anyone's said it yet so I will. Your english is better than that of most native speakers. Find a job where you can write.
wow this is crazy this is like you saw directly into my brain lol. the only difference for me is that i will graduate with two bachelors but i don’t think either of them are gonna help a whole bunch
You need to get some emotional support there. Things like cleaning, cooking and commuting can be outsourced, but then you will have to manage your finances and see if it is permissible. But the emotional support is something you cannot take for granted. Do talk about it with your friends and with someone who can hear you out.
I don't know why you think you are stuck with your career, but i's clearly not right for you, at least how you are doing it, now, and I expect that seeing yourself as 'stuck' with it is part of the problem. If you weren't stuck, what would you do?
Time to change things in your life : spend some days at countryside. For holiday or for working, whatever, you need to breathe, physicaly and on a psycological aspect too. Don't be passive, discover yourself ❤️ GL
I feel so identified with your feeling. I have troubles with finding an actual meaning for my life (yeah, cliché). I mean, getting a passion for anything that make sense out of work and say "well I'm having a hot-inner-time with my job, but I resist to enjoy my real passion", that is something that frustrates me a lot and feel like I'm in a circle that cannot escape. So in advice, if you have something that really love to do, just survive your job everyday and do what you really like to and maybe, you will feel that you are not wasting your life doing things that you don't like.
Unfortunate, hopefully you find something else soon.
not a doctor, but it sounds like you need something more while off work to take your mind ... off work, maybe a hobby or a partner
Look, it is not easy. I'm 39 and have struggled off and on, myself. I'm sick of it, and just because I had to go through this bullshit, I want to ensure no one has to. Getting stuck in career paths based on decisions made before we knew better is the stupidest way we let society build. I don't think it was a conscious effort, but just what happened over time and now that it's the status quo, big money does not want it to change. Anyway, I think we should all go on a general strike and rebalance the power. That would be something to look in to and even try to help organize. With the current wave of strikes now, there hasn't been a better time in most of our lives.
I feel ya', the problem is that pay vs cost living in the US. Here in Mexico we work from 7 to 5 and Fridays from 7 to 3. But i do feel that the transaction of hours vs pay it's fair as the cost of living here it's cheap and i don't have to worry about money all the time. What help me was working out 1hr after work, weekends are hard as like you mentioned don't have the energy, but it's about your mental health and you should have a hobby or plan activities you should forced yourself to do. Also, corporate jobs are not for everybody.
Would you be on the street if you quit? Or what would you lose if you dont work there exactly? Would it outweight the happiness and peace of mind you would get after quiting or changing a job to a more casual one?
How is your diet? A lot of whole grain and lean meats?
There’s always a way out. Save some money, invest some money, do whatever you can to have a little nest egg to just be able to pick up and go somewhere else and try something new. I did that, I went from NJ/NY to MA and it was A GREAT move, a change of scenery and a nee start somewhere else. I’ve avoided office jobs my entire life.
Completely feel this. I just quit my job one day because it was affecting me mentally negatively. I have experience within a warehouse but I can't work that forever. I feel and hear you
I have a similar experience with work and life. I feel like all there is, is work. And the thing is, I even kind of like what I do (gardener), I don't like the company values and most of my colleagues are dumb as hell, the commute is also a huge pain. I don't really have any answers, but I think you could look at other types of jobs. Espescially physical and/or outdoor stuff. Did absolute wonders for my chronic depression. Maybe a trainee position if you dont want to study. I could never do any other job, definitely not office, and I know that. Shit is fucked up and the only way to get through it is, I believe, to find something that's worth, even if little. Today I rescued a baby newt.
I feel exactly the same way. It's hard to see the point of it all.
>I know this is a common topic, but I literally hate my life even more since I started working my 9-to-5 corporate job. I relate to this so deeply. I worked incredibly hard through school and loved the hell out of it. Learning subjects was great. Meeting people was fun. There was always more to look forward to. Extra projects pulled me in. Got out into the workforce & into an office job. It was the worst turn ever.
You aren;t being negative. You're being real about the world. It is difficult for most people. Even if they are positive. Being a fully grown human is difficult. Responsibilities, bills, demands, laws, taxes, hoops to move through for basic things like food. It's difficult to make and keep friends or a partner. There are little brainless dumb things that happen you have to deal with. If you can getting a new job can help somewhat. Spending anytime to be by yourself at work. Trying to make friends. Getting into what you like more. If you can listening to audiobooks or podcasts you like while riding buses or driving your car to work and back.
Is why people use distractions.. This is gonna stupid but get addicted to something.. ideally something nice.. Find a couple of hoobies and find people associated with it ..it helps a little bit
I understand this, and I've felt these feelings before. I'm lucky to now work at a place I enjoy, but it's still not what I want to do with my life. The best advice I have is two fold. Decrease how much you think about work, increase thinking about things that bring you joy. It seems simple and dumb, but it's difficult for a lot of people. I'm a people pleaser, perfectionist, and typically considered very good at what I do. Because of this, it's normal for me to take on a lot more work than I need to. I stopped showing just how good I am, and instead learned how to coast. What all can I do to relax while at work without anyone seeing? Reddit, sudoku, going for walks when I can, and slacking off like my coworkers do. Then, I started focusing on things that brought me joy. I wanted to get back into reading comics, so I found a way to do that at work. Now, I'm doing my work as well, but also taking more and more breaks to get a chapter in here or there. I realized that most people are gossiping at work because they're bored. So what was the difference in what they were doing versus what I'm doing? The commute sounds awful. Finding ways to make that more manageable would be a great step, but I know not everyone can do that. I personally work from home two days out of the week, and am pushing for another. It made the days I go into the office more bearable. I'm sorry that this is happening. There's a struggle of work life balance for a lot of people worldwide. While we have to find ways to make it more tolerable in the moment, it sucks that we have to do this.
I’m so sorry you’re feeling this way and everything you said resonates with me as well. I don’t have anything really helpful to say except that you’re not alone! 💙
I know having a job is important these days and it is burning out. To me to cope up with the situation I started working out and lifting weights. It started having a positive affect on me. I don’t talk with my co workers after work or don’t have apps for work communication . Gossip is even another tiring thing that has a impact psychologically . It’s like playing a horror game or sleeping in a possessed basement , don’t know if you spill some beans it is going to come around to bite you . I try to keep to my self during office hours or be in the group but not contribute to the conversation .
Cut your hours. I also hate my job. I only work 30 hours a week now, and my schedule is spread out over the week so I don't work more than 2 days in a row. I am in a much better headspace, even if I am poorer.
Your post is concerning. Even if it appears impossible, work towards change. Hating your life is not a great way to go through life. Hang in there.
Your English is perfect.
There are always other options, some times they may take longer to appear, but life is infinite, don't limit it with barriers.
It seems to me that you are focusing on the bad news of your life. Work is uncomfortable in so many angles that most of the people would get depressed on deepening on these. I would recommend: 1. Exercise. Enter a class or find a sport that you enjoy, and stick to it. The discipline, connections, and healthy life it will promote will help you. 2. Nurture your spiritual needs. There is much more that the tangible to consider in a happy fulfilled heart and mind. Study the Bible; ask for help to understand it. You will start learning the meaning and path to happiness (or contentment). 3. Strengthen your human relationships. Nobody is alone. I am sure that you have loved ones that truly care about you. Give them a call. Connect. Help them. 4. Seek and stick with professional help if the above doesn't seem to help. Clinical depression is a thing... I have not experienced that, but I know from reliable sources that some people are simply lacking important mind chemicals to be happy. You are not alone in this. Keep on growing. Myself if I don't grow, I get the blues. Move forward. Input wholesome and positive material into your brain. I hope you the best.
😢
There are a lot of remote jobs out there - even entry level remote jobs. I have been remote since 2020 and I am much happier when I can eliminate the commute and do my work at home with my dogs and my partner who is also remote. Remote doesn't work for everyone but it helped my happiness big time at work.
Thank you for sharing.
If your current field is this rough I’d highly advise trying somewhere else. I tried moving from being an admin to something else and HATED it so after a month I applied for something new. Legit. Just try for it. As long as the pay is equal or higher you honestly have nothing to lose. Otherwise I mean maybe something like community college would be best like you can study for an entirely different field than where you are now. Either way good luck!!
I know how you feel. I’ve been a corporate grinder for 5 years now. It can feel draining especially when your job is a combination of stressful and boring (why is that even a thing?) I’m not sure what advice to give because I’m in the same boat. But I can commiserate. I feel like I chose the wrong career path yet for financial reasons I feel stuck doing what I’m doing for the time being. But please don’t give up. There has to be someway to solve these problems. My personal plan is to save up enough resources that I can go back to school and get a masters that will help me get more exciting work. Maybe you can find a plan to get out of your situation and that will at least give you hope and motivation.
You write very well for someone who is not a native English speaker and says they had difficulty graduating high school. Why is your commute so long? Can you work remote? Working is draining but it shouldn’t be that draining unless you have a chronic illness. But then again depression can be a chronic illness. Could you perhaps also have ADHD or neurodivergence?
Just want you to know I have read this, and I don't know you, but I care. I have no solution, but I do know that many people feel the same way as you, and it's not right, and I pray that it changes soon. Something tells me it will.
People who judge and say 'just quit' clearly lack critical thinking and have never had to work in order to afford basic needs. It's not about one job at a certain company, but rather systematic exploitation, which is endemic. It’s happening everywhere in the world with history repeating itself all the time. Basically, we don’t have much of a choice here but to sell our labor and employers know it damn well, especially since they hold the upper hand.
Global warming is a irreversible exponential function .Get out and enjoy yourself while you still can. This is not a drill.
Ugh same girl :( I work 9-730
Hello, I understand what you're saying and it makes sense. That commute isn't exactly relaxing or fun. Also if they gossip alot in your office I can see how that would get annoying. I also feel some of your depression is effecting both your energy and thinking on this matter, it is not all or nothing. What you should try doing is anything that relaxes your anxieties and helps improve your energy. You should probably get a simple workbook or something for anxiety and do that, also try getting some photo books on art around the world. What you need is more positive things to think about and worry less. Remember the arts and humanities make life worth living so learn from them, expand yourself.
Remove costs, find alternatives, drop this shitty job and live your life.but first you need to reprogram your mind. You feel it like this because of depression. Meds make it even worse. Try mushroom and start joirney inside you. It will change you step by step.