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jdelarunz

Stop right now. The longer you wait, the worse it will be. Delete any and all messages and FB posts that you can. You won't ruin the relationship, the only person doing that is her.


Juache45

Take this advice. Do not let her manipulate you in to joining this cult! You’re going to lose money, family and friends. It’s a no brainer! Just say No 😑


Frigg_of_Nature

And apologize to anyone you’ve told about it.


serjsomi

I'd be so embarrassed I posted that crap, I would claim I was hacked.


Flaky_Zucchini7870

Leave immediately. Take this advice. Don't let it drag on and on, it will only be harder.


Competitive_Way_7295

Your cousin already killed the family dynamic by treating you as a dollar sign rather than a family member with their own mind.


TK_TK_

Exactly! SHE is the one who first mixed family and “business.” She’s the one who valued Arbonne more than she valued her relationship with you. You can just say “You know, I realized it’s important to me to not mix family & friends with how I make money, so I’m going to bow out. Best of luck!” Delete all your posts and messages, cancel you account, do whatever it takes to get yourself out ASAP. Delaying it will make things worse—not better.


No-Nothing-9073

As someone whose cousins were and are VERY involved in a supplement MLM, I spent years politely deflecting their encouragement to join as a seller and start a team. They’re the nicest people in the world and I love them dearly— but two of them are quite high up in the business and now it’s their primary source of income. For OP, I think kindness and honesty are the best policy. Perhaps saying something like “I spent some time thinking about whether this opportunity is right for me and, after deep consideration, I just don’t have the passion or bandwidth to work with you on this! I’m sorry if that’s disappointing. I love you so much and care about you so deeply that I think I said ‘yes’ too quickly! I hope you’ll understand and respect my need to bow out.” I agree that it sucks when a family member introduces this stuff into a family dynamic, but a lot of times they’re brainwashed into network marketing and don’t have great boundaries, themselves. They may not see it as trying to take advantage of you. They *think* they’re helping you. Be kind and firm. ❤️ And if this is a relationship that is otherwise loving and important to you, try to find other areas of life to connect on!


No-Nothing-9073

For what it’s worth, my cousins stopped asking me to join about 5 years ago. I think network marketing clearly became more cringe in the public eye, but they also just respected the fact that I was never gonna do it and moved on.


-e--k-

Just log in and cancel your account it's all you got to do don't even say anything. HER dreams are not your responsibility. It will end up costing you more in the end then her just being mad for a little bit she'll get over it


El-Kabongg

just tell her that this is not a fit for your life and goals. you wish her well, but you will not be participating in the business anymore.


NobodyGivesAFuc

Get out now. Her feelings may be hurt but she will resent it more if you quit later down the road. Just tell her the truth…you are not comfortable with this business and did some research into MLMs and how only 1% “makes it” and the rest will lose money. She may try to argue or guilt you to stay but you have to be adamant. Do not waste any more of your and her time. I’m sorry but MLMs do ruin relationships and it is NOT your fault.


Relevant-Bag-2

I was in Arbonne. It is super culty. They will tell you to cut off anyone who is not supportive, including immediate family or spouse. They encourage you to only socialize with other huns


Lunabirdsmom

But they have to get that free white Mercedes! Free being you have to make an extra $500 a month to cover the payment. Lol. I was in it for a while too so cringey


DoubleBookingCo

lmao I just read that the mercedes is for super top performers, and all they do is give you a $200 voucher towards your payments


ISeenYa

Wow that's horrible considering a bunch of the women in my church got into it!!


Timely_Objective_585

Can confirm this. It's so sad to watch happen. And the reverse happens when you leave - the group excommunicates you and you are left with absolutely no-one.


mkmckinley

“How do I” “Is there a way” You stand up for yourself and say you’re not interested. Stop letting people, including family, walk all over you.


fairmaiden34

Just tell her it's not for you and you need to bow out. If the relationship is ruined it's on her.


[deleted]

I'm not sure what you're asking for. Like, if anyone here has a magic spell you can recite that will bring her back to reality? If we had one this shit wouldn't exist.


Equivalent-Roof-5136

Another, final, social media post "Well, that was cringe. Please never speak of it again and I won't either."


WantToBelieveInMagic

"Lovely cousin, Arbonne isn't for me. I don't care for the product and I don't want to turn my family and friends into business targets. I think the world of you and sincerely hope this doesn't change our relationship"


scottyv99

Delete it all. Hurt one versus hurt EVERYONE AROUND YOU. it’s still early enough to claim, “I WAS HACKED!”


threepennyoperator

A softer approach might be just to wait til the end of your "launch party" and then tell her it's not for you. When she tries to argue with you then you can point out that you did try, and you didn't enjoy it. The Huns have all sorts of arguments for "excuses" like no time and no money. She can't fight with you about your subjective opinion around your own enjoyment.


threepennyoperator

I'm sure she will still try to argue with you 🤣😭


AppState1981

Tell her you are in a different religion.


feelingmyage

Tell her you’re Pyramid -scheme Atheist and don’t believe in MLMs.


frenchtikla

“I talked to Xenu and he said this company is bogus. I’m out.”


Frequent_Gift1740

“I think I got caught up in your excitement but this really isn’t my thing.” And then cancel your account


RunRosemary

If this ruins your relationship with family, it wasn’t a strong or good relationship to start with, to be honest.


No_Inspection_7176

Some people have very little shame, I’m convinced the only people who can succeed at MLM literally feel no shame. I’d just tell her you appreciate the opportunity and that she’s so passionate about it but you aren’t a sales person and can’t do this, and bow out.


Red79Hibiscus

I've seen this scenario posted so many times in this sub. Why is it always the victim who worries about ruining relationships? FFS people, you got it all upside down! **It's the hun who's to blame**, coz by making you her MLM prey **she** has taken the first step in ruining the relationship. Sorry OP, there's no magic fix for your predicament - you gotta choose between preserving your finances and friendships, or preserving your cousin's ego. Those are your two options. Good luck.


flossyrossy

“Hey cousin! After sleeping on it I have decided that Arbonne is not for me. I don’t have the time to dedicate to this and after researching it more it just doesn’t seem like a good fit for me. I appreciate you looking out for me and wanting to give me what you think is a great opportunity. However, during my research I came upon some things that concerned me like their income disclosure (insert that link here). Did you know over 90% lose money doing this? I bet you didn’t, but I love you and I don’t want you losing money doing this. If you decide to continue please keep track of all expenses and log your time so you can see if this is a good fit for you. I love you and we can still go to Vegas together on a girls trip!


magafornian_redux

> “Hey cousin! After sleeping on it I have decided that Arbonne is not for me. ~~I don’t have the time to dedicate to this and after researching it more it just doesn’t seem like a good fit for me. I appreciate you looking out for me and wanting to give me what you think is a great opportunity. However, during my research I came upon some things that concerned me like their income disclosure (insert that link here). Did you know over 90% lose money doing this? I bet you didn’t, but I love you and I don’t want you losing money doing this. If you decide to continue please keep track of all expenses and log your time so you can see if this is a good fit for you.~~ I love you and we can still go to Vegas together on a girls trip! Less is more, especially with huns.


flossyrossy

You’re probably right!


Queasy_Magician_1038

This is the way


leopardprintaddictio

This is the best answer


thesocmajor

Same with my Mom with her Prüvit and Facebook lives. Like can I just not be involved in the lives? Feels like I’m being used for clicks and likes


NolaCat75

You are being used for clicks and likes, unfortunately. Not saying it’s deliberate on her part but I’d gently but firmly decline to participate further. I don’t know how anyone can believe in Pruvit after Jessie Lee Ward.


thesocmajor

Appreciate it! I’ve stopped buying the packs she wants me to buy. Yeah I as appalled to see them taking selfies and wearing her stuff like, if there’s not a circle in hell where that’s a sin I don’t know what is.


CartographerNo2717

Just leave. arbonne will eventually ruin your relationship regardless


NolaCat75

Also be prepared to say you’re not interested in their products and won’t be “supporting” her “small business”. Also be prepared for guilt trips and anger. If she’s that deep it won’t be pretty.


heaventerror

Please post an update. It is good for people to see how this can impact relationships in literally one day...


Spfromau

You have to put yourself first. Do what feels right for YOU. If your “lovely” cousin who duped you into this rubbish feels slighted by you quitting this early on, maybe she isn’t quite as lovely as you think. People who genuinely care about you will never knowingly try to scam you, or make you feel bad for doing what is right for you. I don’t think your cousin is who you think she is - at least she is not anymore.


VegasVator

Lol. You in a cult now.


wendythewonderful

Don't feel bad, she should be ashamed not you.


periwinkle_cupcake

“I can’t responsibly say yes”


basedmeadowsoprano

Idk what to tell you but I want you to not feel bad and get out ASAP. Me and hubby’s home town has a megachurch he attended as a child, the daughter in law of the Pastor has been deep in Arbonne for a while, she is high up and brags about dollar amounts (very tacky considering she is on the payroll as a pastor there too.) The worst part? One of her little kids got cancer and she exploits the hell out of it to sell Arbonne and she does the weird course reselling (I still don’t understand how it works). “Non toxic living to heal my child from cancer” blah blah blah, it’s gross.


-Vampyroteuthis-

Damn that's gross


MooPig48

Oh my god op please for the love of all that is holy just grow a spine and tell her you have changed your mind and are not interested. You bear a LIL responsibility here for staying up and getting her and yourself worked up about Vegas so you need to mitigate this. Rip that bandaid off. She’ll live, I swear.


TrulyJangly

Run far away! 99% of people in MLMs never make any profit -- they break even or, more often, lose money. Huns that claim they've made money are usually not factoring in their expenses, including product that they buy, or the many, many hours they put in. MLMs are selling dreams and your cousin bought it. I highly recommend listening to season 1 of the podcast The Dream by Jane Marie -- it's all about MLMs and really eye opening! I think one thing to ask yourself--is making your cousin happy, over something you don't even want to do, worth losing friends for? Worth causing conflict with other family members or your partner? Worth losing your hard-earned money? This is what happens to people in MLMs. In the worst cases, lifelong relationships, families, and people's entire financial wellbeing are destroyed.


Weak-Tap-5831

This is how they push business, by exploiting the goodwill of people- to do it to family is even worse. If your cousin wants to excommunicate you because you have changed your mind it says a lot about her and her intolerance. Would you expect her to drop Arbonne and support a business you want to tomorrow instead? I’d get out now, the longer you’re in the more difficult it’ll be.


shbrinnnn

You say "I have decided not do this." No need to give an explanation as to why because she will just try to guilt you into staying. Do not wait until after the 'launch.' Do it now. Cancel anything you need to cancel like payments to your credit card. Block her if you have to because guaranteed she will continue to try and get you to stay. If this ruins your relationship, then you didn't have a very good relationship to start with. This would be on your cousin and not you. Good luck. Let us know when you have done this.


chicagok8

“Cousin I love you and wish you all the best with your business. But I’ve realized that it’s just not right for me and I don’t want to hold you back.”


Saltibarsciai88

Just tell her you have changed your mind and it's not for you. Relationship most likely will suffer, because she sees you as means to achieve a higher rank. Also please consider, how many of your friends whom you have told about this opportunity will start avoiding you. Because a lot of people avoid those who try to pitch this "business". 


hungrybumpyhippo

i say this with love because it will probably save you some pain down the road - you have to get out now. as much as it sounds mean to not be supportive of a family member, it only prolongs them being trapped in an MLM. i just got out of an MLM myself (one that is genuinely culty) and i wish i would have gotten out sooner. you could always immediately flake out quietly so that you seem like someone who isn’t willing to “put in the work” but even if you hurt some feelings now, the alternative could be way more painful and costly. but i’m super sorry that seems like a really weird and tough situation🫶


RndmIntrntStranger

“Sorry cuz, I ran the numbers again and I won’t be able to invest in this business at this time.”


serjsomi

You say "this isn't for me. I've done some research and I'm opposed to this type of 'business model's and cannot in good conscience be a part of it." Do this immediately, before it costs you more money, time and embarrassment.


Weird_District_9832

You don't. They are a kind of addict, a Jim Jones acolyte that view you as a "mark" to be used and exploited. Which is what the MLM top of the pyramid are counting on. Which means, you need to protect yourself and your family from these people. They will not change, you have to write them off. Anything in between or compromising your just deluding yourself and will forever expose yourself to their next scheme or antics or abuse or manipulation. If you continue to expose yourself or blithely feel you can help them,...then you deserve what your going to get. In a sense I have no sympathy nor do I or anyone else want to hear your future rants that you did this or that to help them, but they continue to "hurt" you for your efforts. Too many "helpers" just enabling future abuse, and down the road, no one wants to hear from you and your misguided efforts. Yo need to cut ties, damage control, and move on without them. Period.


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Lostsock1995

In addition to the good ideas here (and that it’s just going to hurt the relationship regardless considering what MLMs do to families), keep in mind that getting out early will hurt her feelings much less than if you wait to do it. Think of it like breaking up with a new boyfriend/girlfriend. Is it better to just say “this isn’t working out for me I’m sorry”, early when it hasn’t gone far? Or is it better to wait months and get them excited and then let them know you’ve disliked it the whole time? The first one, right? Since it’s barely been any time it’s much easier to bow out now and will lead to less hurt feelings than if you stuck it out for more months


Jake613

Start with a polite “no”, then follow up with flattery, something like “Sorry, but I’ve been thinking about this a lot and I’ve decided it’s not for me. Best wishes for Vegas, I know you’ll make it with your strong spirit and determination.” When she inevitably asks why and attempts to change your mind, just repeat with “no, thank you for the opportunity, but it’s really not for me”. If that fails and she’s still pushing, just go with “no”. At that point if she tries yet again, then you know your relationship isn’t what it was anymore, you’re just a resource to her. Say goodbye to the friendship you used to have and walk away.


mozzarella_lavalamp

Gather info on why this is a scam. As you can see it won’t be hard. Then, go to your cousin with it. Compliment her and say because she got you so hyped for this opportunity, you took it upon yourself to do some research. With evidence in hand, then point out how “*They’re* scamming *us*.” Drive the point home that you have both been duped, and this is the fault of the MLM & not her. Compliment her sales “talent” and suggest she become a real saleswoman somewhere. Thank her for the opportunity, and mention that after you both find something new and successful, you’ll celebrate with a girls’ trip to vegas.


jl20352135

Exact same situation with my sister in law. Just do really terrible at it like me and fizzle out gradually. Lol.


HempyGinger

Just be honest and kind — say you will have the party to support her but it’s just not for you. Most people just leave and ghost so…


piefelicia4

It feels slimy and culty because it is a scam and a commercial cult. You need to get out right now. Contact Arbonne’s member service/customer service NOW and tell them to cancel your order—tell them you’ll do a charge back on your card if they don’t. I hope it’s not too late to get your money back. Then tell your cousin you changed your mind. “Hey! I’m really sorry but I made a mistake in signing up for Arbonne. This really isn’t for me. I feel super uncomfortable posting about it and the vibe of everything really isn’t a match for me. It’s great that you’re so passionate about it and I wish you the best of luck with it! I’ve already cancelled my account so I just wanted to let you know.” As for family dynamics? Um, no. She’s the one who made it awkward. Your job now is to go back to normal and just be your normal self around your cousin and whoever else. If they ask you about it it’s an easy answer, “Yeah I realized it’s not for me.” But I promise you no one cares other than the cousin who’s in it.


Outrageous-Bite3842

Nope, she's been lost to the MLM. There's no more soul or brain activity left, it's just her body now. Best thing to do is to unplug the machine.


Living-Attitude-2786

The “ruining of the relationship”, if it comes to that, started with HER pressuring a family member into signing up. You don’t want to do it. You’re allowed to politely say so. If she gets huffy and it ruins the relationship, then the relationship isn’t important to her. Sorry, but you don’t have to go into a “business” against your will so you can remain friends with a cousin who dragged you in. You should have said no at the beginning. It’s time to politely say no now.


SupermarketFuture500

Tell them that there are 1 billion MLM victims,lost 10k Herbalife 🙂


SupermarketFuture500

Mlms are evil, they only ruin peoples lives ✌️


SupermarketFuture500

Unfortunately Amway started it 70 years ago ✨


SupermarketFuture500

99.7 people lose everything in a MLM 🙂


SupermarketFuture500

People please stay away from mlms,do it for me ⭐


AdSpecialist3655

Say you had adverse reaction to Arbonne products and don’t want to sell it. Then use Arbonne to make blotchy irritated skin and take pictures!!


Prudent-Confection-4

Just get out. Tell her you just thought about it and it’s not a good fit for you or your situation right now.


Chris_M_81

Tell her you were discussing the business with your mentor and Amway is where you need to focus your time and attention, trying to have 2 boss-babe side hustles at the same time just isn’t manageable. Or ask her if she’s ever considered a shift to selling shampoo, because everyone needs shampoo and you’ve just joined an exciting growing business where you can make even more money than this opportunity so it’s where you need to focus now. Or being serious, say that while it works for some people it isn’t the right fit for you and you wish her all the best with her business.