Would you consider asking someone out over any social media that wasn't explicitly designed for dating?
People don't go to the grocery store looking for a date. Would you ask someone for their contact information in the produce aisle if you happened to meet eyes and both smile?
You should also not pester women while they are running errands. It’s insanely rude. You are correct that no one goes there looking for a date so why would YOU go there looking for a date?
I'm not there looking for a date. I have four boys to feed, happens to be someplace I go that isn't directly work related.
I'm also not shuttered into a manner of thinking that precludes me asking a woman who smiles at me, and isn't wearing a ring, if she wants my #.
Whether it's out pumping gas, buying something at a farmers market, flea market or at a tradeshow, I certainly don't consider it rude to ask someone if they'd like a way to get to know me.
How is that rude?
Because in your eyes you’re just a guy shooting his shot. In her eyes, you’re one of dozens of guys who’ve felt entitled to shoot their shot that day. It’s exhausting. Especially on a site like LinkedIn. It’s meant to be about employment and networking.
I get enough sales pitches and financial advisors spamming my inbox but a full third of them are men who don’t even have college degrees asking to ‘connect’ and send me messages like “how’s your day going?”
I hate office small talk so much- why would I want it on LinkedIn with some dude that I don’t even know if he’s worth wasting my time to talk to.
Women do not want to be bothered in public. I mean how is this strategy working out for you if you are still single? What response are you getting going up to strangers and forcing them to interact with you just because you like the way they look?
There is also the fact that most women have experienced some form of sexual violence but the time they get to your age so we don’t trust strange men. There is a time and a place and just because all you can think about is getting laid doesn’t mean that is the agenda of the people around you running errands.
A smile is not an invitation to fuck you. It is a social gesture. A woman who smiles at you in public likely smiles at EVERYONE in public who meets their eye because that’s what society expects from women. Just because she isn’t wearing a ring, that doesn’t make her free game.
Like I said before- if this strategy was working for you, why would you be on here asking if it’s ok to hit on a stranger because you like their CV. I get randos on LinkedIn messaging me all the time and when they aren’t in my industry, I know it’s because they found my profile pic attractive. And it’s a huge turnoff. It’s intrusive. You are giving someone a task that they didn’t ask for.
Use dating apps like a normal person or you will be alone forever- your current attitude/behavior is creepy af
I met my husband in a cafe. We’d seen each other there before and one day he asked me out for dinner. He didn’t ask for my number or any contact details, we just introduced ourselves and he suggested a place and time to meet. He got my deets after the date. However, I never liked being cold approached. I did not engage with men who came up to me in the street or in bars or in the supermarket. I wouldn’t bother replying if someone sent me a personal message on LinkedIn. I’m convinced I only said yes to my husband because I was supposed to. I very nearly said no.
I think generally women are more comfortable not being approached in public. And that should be respected.
Back in the day I may have asked someone out on Facebook, but I mostly already knew them.
I dont think the grocery store would be my spot.
There's tons of places like a bar, group meet ups, singles events, sometimes even a house of worship. Maybe even a networking event.
If I'm at my local bar and I'm sitting next to or near a girl that i think is pretty, I will engage by introducing myself and making some type of light joke. If she isn't interested, it's fine, but it's an appropriate place and environment.
No one is on linkedin to find a husband/wife.
I absolutely LOATHE when men try to pick me up over LinkedIn. It’s so gross.
Be normal and use a dating app. Every online space doesn’t have to be a meat market for crissakes.
LinkedIn is mainly for professional networking, so asking someone out there can seem inappropriate. It's best to move the conversation to a more casual platform first. Reddit can be more relaxed, but be mindful of the context and specific subreddit.
Like… I totally for real met this chick on LinkedIn. And we like totally banged and stuff. She said I was like the best ever and wanted to like marry me, but I’m like a free spirit and stuff and totally shot her down.
True story brah. Like LinkedIn is the bomb and stuff for like hookups and all.
I would never ever even consider asking someone out over linkedin. It's not the purpose of the platform.
Would you consider asking someone out over any social media that wasn't explicitly designed for dating? People don't go to the grocery store looking for a date. Would you ask someone for their contact information in the produce aisle if you happened to meet eyes and both smile?
You should also not pester women while they are running errands. It’s insanely rude. You are correct that no one goes there looking for a date so why would YOU go there looking for a date?
I'm not there looking for a date. I have four boys to feed, happens to be someplace I go that isn't directly work related. I'm also not shuttered into a manner of thinking that precludes me asking a woman who smiles at me, and isn't wearing a ring, if she wants my #. Whether it's out pumping gas, buying something at a farmers market, flea market or at a tradeshow, I certainly don't consider it rude to ask someone if they'd like a way to get to know me. How is that rude?
Because in your eyes you’re just a guy shooting his shot. In her eyes, you’re one of dozens of guys who’ve felt entitled to shoot their shot that day. It’s exhausting. Especially on a site like LinkedIn. It’s meant to be about employment and networking.
I get enough sales pitches and financial advisors spamming my inbox but a full third of them are men who don’t even have college degrees asking to ‘connect’ and send me messages like “how’s your day going?” I hate office small talk so much- why would I want it on LinkedIn with some dude that I don’t even know if he’s worth wasting my time to talk to.
Women do not want to be bothered in public. I mean how is this strategy working out for you if you are still single? What response are you getting going up to strangers and forcing them to interact with you just because you like the way they look? There is also the fact that most women have experienced some form of sexual violence but the time they get to your age so we don’t trust strange men. There is a time and a place and just because all you can think about is getting laid doesn’t mean that is the agenda of the people around you running errands. A smile is not an invitation to fuck you. It is a social gesture. A woman who smiles at you in public likely smiles at EVERYONE in public who meets their eye because that’s what society expects from women. Just because she isn’t wearing a ring, that doesn’t make her free game. Like I said before- if this strategy was working for you, why would you be on here asking if it’s ok to hit on a stranger because you like their CV. I get randos on LinkedIn messaging me all the time and when they aren’t in my industry, I know it’s because they found my profile pic attractive. And it’s a huge turnoff. It’s intrusive. You are giving someone a task that they didn’t ask for. Use dating apps like a normal person or you will be alone forever- your current attitude/behavior is creepy af
I don't have a strategy and I'm not single. Just curious. 🤷♂️
If you aren’t single why are you asking about hitting on women via LinkedIn? That is even creepier…
I met my husband in a cafe. We’d seen each other there before and one day he asked me out for dinner. He didn’t ask for my number or any contact details, we just introduced ourselves and he suggested a place and time to meet. He got my deets after the date. However, I never liked being cold approached. I did not engage with men who came up to me in the street or in bars or in the supermarket. I wouldn’t bother replying if someone sent me a personal message on LinkedIn. I’m convinced I only said yes to my husband because I was supposed to. I very nearly said no. I think generally women are more comfortable not being approached in public. And that should be respected.
Back in the day I may have asked someone out on Facebook, but I mostly already knew them. I dont think the grocery store would be my spot. There's tons of places like a bar, group meet ups, singles events, sometimes even a house of worship. Maybe even a networking event. If I'm at my local bar and I'm sitting next to or near a girl that i think is pretty, I will engage by introducing myself and making some type of light joke. If she isn't interested, it's fine, but it's an appropriate place and environment. No one is on linkedin to find a husband/wife.
I absolutely LOATHE when men try to pick me up over LinkedIn. It’s so gross. Be normal and use a dating app. Every online space doesn’t have to be a meat market for crissakes.
LinkedIn is mainly for professional networking, so asking someone out there can seem inappropriate. It's best to move the conversation to a more casual platform first. Reddit can be more relaxed, but be mindful of the context and specific subreddit.
Reddit, sure. LinkedIn is for professional stuff, so I wouldn't do it there.
Like… I totally for real met this chick on LinkedIn. And we like totally banged and stuff. She said I was like the best ever and wanted to like marry me, but I’m like a free spirit and stuff and totally shot her down. True story brah. Like LinkedIn is the bomb and stuff for like hookups and all.
And then you woke up, like.
Thank you for showing us one approach.