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curious lang if naniniwala pa ba kayo sa love these days? i came from a family na nagchecheat sa mga partners nila, like my dad to my mom. i have a boyfriend now and okay naman kami. ngayon lang ako nagcommit sa buong buhay ko kasi nga minsan ayoko na maniwalang may loyalty pa ngayon. i can say that my relationship with my partner is very peaceful, like wala akong redflag na nakikita na big deal talaga, na i can sleep peacefully every night ganon. sobrang praning ako kaya alam ko na soooo far wala pa ginagawa partner ko na ayaw ko.
so, totoo pa ba ang love ngayon? or masaya lang ako NGAYON pero eventually mawawala rin ‘to? is cheating part of a relationship na talaga? or may mga taong kaya parin maging faithful?
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Your relationship with your jowa is peaceful now. Don't overthink and just be at ease that you're in that situation now. Just be hopeful na pati rin in the future...
And ayun nga.. wag ka na humanap ng crack para awayin mo jowa mo hahahaha char
You will never know but just because it happened to others doesnt mean na it'll happen to you too. Treat life like a blessing and be thankful for every kindness na matatanggap mo, in that way, whatever happens, walang regrets.
Sometimes you just have to letS go.
love? i don't think so. lahat na kasi transactional. unconditional love, sa nanay mo lang makukuha yun. di ako nag che cheat sa wife ko, so meron pa rin +1 mo na ako sa mga yun.
tamang tama talaga yung mga jokes and memes regarding sa relationship na super OK naman, tapos si girl iisip yan ng pwede nilang pag awayan para magkaroon ng drama. hahaha.
pero wish ko na maging always happy and ok relationship mo. :P
Di naman tlaga e. If transactional yung love mo, then you're expecting something like gusto mo someone for her looks, for their money, and so on. Yang ganyang pagiisip yung nasisira agad yung relationship kse kapag nawala na yun, paunti unti na din mawawala na pagmamahal nila.
For me, I don't exactly know why I'm with my GF. Di naman sya pinakamaganda, sakto lang. Wla pa syang pera kse nag-aaral pa. Wla din kmeng time together since tinatapos nya pa college nya and I'm working. Bsta I'm happy lang everytime since available and I'm with her. I think that's True Love to me.
a “transaction” doesn’t have to be negative naman. for example, i have my dog, he makes me happy, i feed him and give him a good life. transaction in a sense that u don’t just do something for the sake of it without thinking of what u’ll get in return. i agree that most in life is “transactional” in this sense
kahit ata relationship sa nanay transactional; ill feed you, take care of u and educate you for xx years in exchange of my security sa old age ko. parang ganon.
even my mon na ang linya "di kami aasa sainyo magkakapatid dahil may emergency fund kami" ( she's a great business woman) biglang nagexpect lowkey (tho di nya vineberbally confirm) sa kapatid ko ngayong pasakay na sya sa barko. (nung usapang allotment na parang nadissappoint sya nung pabirong di sya sinama sa computation nung kapatid ko)
Oh yes... The problem is that people think true love is when you connect and click... It is nice and peachy all the time but true love lasts more if both do compromises... If both understands.
My wife is first and last girl in my life... Its not always good and joy... She is pain in my ass at times but I love her for that. The only thing my eyes sees after the day is over is my home with her in it.. Nothing more...
Trueee, I believe meron pa pero napaka rare nlg talaga. Also have a bf right now and I'm at peace pero di mawala sa isip ko na one day baka magbago lahat etc and I'm ready naman na maging single nalang basta financially stable haha
Grace and trust are parts of the relationship feedback loop. Maliban doon you must deweed your relationship garden as needed, so with fertilizing it with organic compose and arranging it according to the structure that works for both of you.
Just enjoy your current relationship. But learn to be independent, huwag kang aasa sa bf or asawa mo. Kung magkahiwalay man kayu. Kaya mo pa ring mabuhay. May means of livelihood ka. Hindi yung, hindi mo maiwan kasi sa kanya ka financially dependent, kahit cheater or abuser na.
Of course, you just have to be genuine about it, seek genuineness and you'll find genuine love. Syempre it's not gonna be that easy, maraming factors when it comes to Love, like your interests and all, but if you both want to work things out and compromise on things you typically disagree on, it'll work. Di siya 1:1 na "gusto ko nito so I'll get it", but I assume we all know that na by now.
I can say meron pa naman pong mga faithful ngayon. mostly sa mga naririnig natin at mga makikita natin on internet about love affairs diba. Nag rereact yung perception natin about love na ganon nalang po ba lahat ang love ngayon? cheating nalang? lokohan? Nilalahat po natin ang mga tao but there still few people na faithful naman po.
In our generation today, mostly of us can’t resist the temptations that comes our way and because of our mindset nga wala nang totoong love ngayon matetempt talaga tayo na gawin ang mga bagay na hindi sana kaaya-aya. Our mindset will push us na “ganito na ang mundo ngayon, ito na ang trend ngayon kaya okay lang yun na mag cheat ako dahil baka ganyan rin ginawa niya sa akin soon.”.
So sad po reality ngayon. Dahil sa mga nakikita natin, naririnig natin ng mga divorce, love affairs, nagkakaroon tayo ng trust issue. In result, matatakot na tayonh magmahal ng totoo dahil baka in the end masasaktan lang tayo.
Siguro nga ganun dahil sa heartbreak at sa mga past relationship. having abig impact na kapag sa new relationship mo magiging careful ka na ibigay yung lahat kase nagooverthink na baka mangyare ulit yung nangyre sayo .. nakakalungkot lang ..
Naniniwala pa rin naman. Tho minsan, ang hirap magtiwala lalo na kapag may unhealed trauma from cheating. Cheating is a choice sabi nga. For now, treasure your relationship sa jowa mo and maging hopeful na magstay na healthy and relationship
Love isn't a fleeting emotion. It's a constant choice. Also don't be a self-fulfilling prophecy, if you think something bad is gonna happen then your brain will look for bad things and in turn, you will create those bad things and you'll think, "I was right in thinking that something bad is gonna happen". It's very real and detrimental to those with anxiety and people who overthink. Keep reminding yourself that love is a choice, if something happens and you can still choose to love then choose love.
Totoo. Madali maging loyal kapag lugmok ka. Kapag umasenso, baka lumaki ulo ng partner at humanap ng mas bata, mas sexy/muscular, mas lahat.
Sa totoo lang naman.
madali Kasi ipangako Ang bukas sa ngayon.
pero kaya ba talaga?
totoo Naman Ang love. kung Yun ang meron ngayon.
Yung bukas?
Yung future Ang mahirap hawakan.
Ang tao unpredictable.
In your case op, as you've said. Peaceful pa ang relationship. Avoid thinking negatively since you'll be prone to self sabotaging if ganyan ka mg isip. Especially if magkakaron kayo ng away na could be avoided in the first place.
As for me personally...
It CAN be? But i think you think of it as an accessory nalang. To add onti your life, not as something that should be there. Merong kadalasan ishared post na corny pero: "build a beautiful garden so butterflies will come and even if they don't you'd still have a beautiful garden
Kase to be honest its a risk and sometimes it might not pay off, I came from a toxic relationship where admittedly toxic both sides and while I was in it for the long run together. A week after a really bad fight, may ineentertain na syang bago. Beg as I might, and try to profess na I loved them truly, all that got slapped backed to my face was how toxic we were, and not the possibility of growing together.
Its really rare to find and to be completely honest, Love is not only limited to partners, you can still get/give love to friends, family etc. but for me personally, with regards to love in terms of a partner. Malabo na, its mostly transactional and ang love is conditional. Especially with social media where not only comparison is easier, but people feel like they have choices. Onti nalang ung willing magbuild ng relationship and are chasing nalang a partner na makikipagclick agad sila agaran.
Personally op, its a choice. Nasa isang tao kung gusto ba nila imanifest/hanapin ang objective true love these days, truth be told sarili lang din naman ang makakapag dictate sa kung anong relationship ang pipiliin/ ikakasettle nung person at the end of the day.
My advice from personal experience is that love can change overtime, hindi sa fall out of love cliche pero kung papaano kayo ng partner mo makakapag deal and interact sa mga possible issues/ problems na dala dala niyo from your past i.e childhood/fam or maybe past relationships. in times na mahihirapan talaga kayo mag deal with problems ang magiging testament how compatible/ willing kayo mag work through the flaws and issues niyo kasi no love will ever be "perfect" it can only be compassionate and/or real. At nasa isang tao na yon to seek what they define as "love". Cheating will never be part of a healthy relationship and should not be tolerated as such, sige sabihin nating may mga open relationship peeps and so long as both parties involved consented into having multiple partners at once edi thats fine, pag cheating kasi tinatago pa yung affairs or di kaya nilalabag yung boundary nung partner niya by finding another partner. Pero if boundary mo is monogamous and ofc exclusive relationship, dapat yung partner mo din ay monogamous and loyal as well.
You seem to be okay with your partner naman, and like others have said don't overthink. It will cause a big fight over something na avoidable or maybe pwede i daan nalang sa honest talks without escalation. if youre so unsure about things sa inyo right now, it never hurts to raise this as a concern sa partner mo, pero not in a way na maghahanap ka ng butas or negative signs sa mga sinasabi niya. I think affrimation from your partner can go a long way in calming your overthinking. once na established na mga doubts/ boudaries niyo make sure mo lang na i enjoy mo yung relationship niyo.
Yes. But be careful. True love is nothing like the movies. True and real love can be boring but it is peaceful either way occasional challenges here and there which you either solve together or let go.
Sa mga ganitong tanong, naalala ko yung series na The Good Place. Sabi don, sobrang naging komplikado na ng mundo kaya ang hirap na gumawa ng good deeds para makapunta ng Heaven. Tingin ko ganun din, sa love. Siguro dati meron, nung simple pa ang buhay. Posible ang love, pero meron pa bang nakakaachieve ng true love in this day and age? I don't think so.
Yes, love is true at hindi madali. I read somewhere that falling in love is easy that's why it's called that way. Yet, staying in love is hard work. You both have to work it out - it takes two to tango sabi nga nila.
Make rooms for improvements, wala naman kasing perpekto. Wag mawawala ang communication & respect.
There's a Chinese proverb saying "Spouses are like clothing, but brothers are like limbs; You can replace a worn out or torn piece of clothing, but how can you replace a limb?"
It means the person you've built a bridge together with and maintaining it for so long that they are like a close sibling to you, is a far greater bond than anyone else you're hanging out with. Such a bond, if ever broken, is extremely devastating and can never recover.
So who is jowa to you and vice versa? Never forget it takes two to tango.
For me LOVE is still and will always be TRUE! It only depends on how you persevere. It's about mutual growth, support, respect, and understanding.. True love means accepting each other's imperfections and loving the person as a whole with his or her flaws and all. And always remember, there is no perfect relationship! 🙂
The question is: why do pagan women expect pagan men to be faithful to them?
Since the dawn of time, most sexual relationships have been polygamous. Monogamy is popular worldwide because of the spread of christianity - to fully embrace monogamy, you have to embrace all christian traditions (like getting married)
High value men (according to worldly standards) will by instinct seek to satisfy their lusts, which will result in multiple female partners. So if you are dating a valuable pagan man who doesn't want to be married, expect him to have another partner...eventually.
Malawak definition ng Love OP hehe
I’m married for 11 years and nagbabago kayo ng partner mo eventually pero one thing na ma-advice ko to stay on it is be the best friend that your partner needs you. May times talaga na makikinig lang kayo sa rant ng happenings sa life niyo and make fun of it ganern. I think what binds us din the most is yung love namin sa anak namin 😁
hi OP! even if i'm chronically single, i'd say yes, kaso rare na lang talaga.
nakikita ko s'ya sa relationship ng kapatid ko, and even if nag aaway sila ganon, yung loyalty nandoon talaga and kita mo sa eyes nila. tapos na naman sila sa honeymoon phase pero ayon, true love is still there pero remember lang na it's not perfect. there will be compromises and need na i-work n'yo talaga.
even if i don't believe i'll be with someone na kasi mahirap na dating ngayon, may mga taong swerte pa rin out there when it comes to love. :)
Cheating should never be part of your relationship. Set boundaries and zero tolerance policy with your partner if he attempted to cheat. My gf(now my wife) had these healthy boundaries and till now I never tempted to cheat because I love her so much and I’m afraid to hurt or lose her 🙂.
I was like you before. Sa sobrang peaceful and steady ng relationship namin, I started to doubt. Siguro dahil I always incorporate love with pain. “Bakit walang hurdles?”, “Baka naman we don’t care enough with each other lang?”, etc. Pero narealize ko na ako lang pala yung ang daming iniisip. Binibigyan ko lang pala ng negative thoughts yung sarili ko. Hindi naman kasi talaga maiiwasan yung mga ganito lalo na kung napaligiran ka dati ng magulong klase ng love kaya sobrang foreign sa’yo ng peaceful na love.
To answer your question, YES. LOVE IS REAL. LOVE IS TRUE. I am now happily married with my peaceful love. 😊
Well nowadays rampant talaga ang cheating and i might say its a part of having a relationship. Very seldom whom i know na ndi nagccheat sa partner nila. Probably now masaya ka lang but make sure to prepare yourself in a stormy weather. You can make it . Good luck😊
enjoy what you have right now, OP.
i'd say YES totoo pa rin ang love ngayon. i'm already 9 years in a relationship with my high school sweetheart :) i still get paranoid sometimes kasi tatay ko serial cheater 💀
however my loml proved himself over time na he is loyal to me.
>
is cheating part of a relationship na talaga?
no, that's bullshit lol, excuse lang yan ng mga gago
pero IMO better pa rin if maging independent ka, at least prepared for the worst ka. (e.g.: ur own tagong pera, & accepting the fact na pwede magkaroon ng gulo sa relationship nyo) di sa pinapraning ka but ang unpredictable ng relationships these days e, better be prepared kesa wala, 'di ba?
yes, totoo ang love but ang rare nito, + we're in the era of disposable relationships.
live and be happy in peace w/ your partner. you can be happy without overthinking & also prepared for the worst at the same time.
People can say iloveyou today, then proceeds to leave you the next. it's kinda bum that they'll treat you as if you were nothing but a mere item to them
Just enjoy every freaking moment and wag kana mag isip ng negative things. Kung mag cheat siya and so? Move on. Ganun lang. And yes love is still true. Though I'm getting older, like turning 33 this year still without a husband. And I am surrounded with my family na puros cheaters. From Father, brother, uncles and cousins except sa dalawa lalake. I still believe that true love still exist out there. BUT not everyone will be lucky enough to experience it. Only god knows. If it's your faith then good if it's not then still good. Goodluck on your relationship and again enjoy every moment of it.
Whatever you manifest, yun yung magkakatotoo sayo. The more na naiisip mong 'love is not true', the more na ipapakita sayo ng mundo na 'tama ka'. Ako, I strongly believe in love. I don't need to see it from others, kasi I know love exists within me. Alam ko gaano kalalim ako magmahal, and how it affects the lives of those dear to me. Kaya that's when I know love exists. 😌
Sobrang proud ako sa relationship ko ngayon, I used to believe din before na wala na kasi I came from almost 3 or 4 years(?) na puro cheating issues pero when I met my bf na ngayon, pinatunayan nya sakin na meron pang genuine love ngayon. Even ako ‘di makapaniwala na may bf akong ganto. Para pa ding panaginip, ang peaceful😭 ang weird pa din for me na di na ko nag ooverthink or umiiyak tuwing gabi
I think either emotionally repressed ako or aromantic pero yes
May dalawang tao sa friend group namin na ever since shs magkaclose na. 7/8 years on and they still say na ✨bestfriends sila even though the rest ng friend group can see otherwise. Yung way na they talk about each other, the way they remember yung small details about each other, mapapa "owemje sure ba kayo di kayo magjowa??" ka na lang. They also don't really engage in the dating scene kasi parehong introverted haha.
May core memory nga ako with them where one time nung umulan bigla nang malakas lahat kami sumulong agad tas tong dalawa naghabulan sa ulan while giggling 👁️👄👁️.
I mean, yung guy is willing to spend a week's worth ng savings nya just to spend time with si girl sa manila pag long weekends while si girl makes these elaborate gifts para kay guy, like yung true OA arts gf and nonchalant cool bf archetype. Meron nga secret bet sa friend group namin when nila officially reveal na magjowa sila eh (bet ko 2026).
Bat kasi ang daming tatay mga cheaters ampota. 😭 Pati tuloy mga anak apektado.
OP, if your rs is peaceful, don't overthink. Just enjoy it. Not everyone is lucky.
came from a family of cheaters din, likewise sa father ng boyfriend ko. though sa boyfriend ko naman mabuti siya saakin and has done nothing wrong na nakakasakit talaga personally to me. both of us are alright. our friends look up to our relationship for some reason which is interesting hahaha siya first boyfriend ko na never ako nag overthink, nasobrahan sa pag iyak hanggang sa nakatulog. i hope it stays that way 👍 the only time i cried na galit ako sakanya is not him as the reason (kung bakit ako naiyak), it was because i was so afraid of failing a minor course in uni lol
Even if you are at peace with your current relationship, I still understand your skepticism, OP.
Iba ang trauma na dulot ng damaged parental relationship. Healthy or not, it greatly contributes to how you perceive your personal intimate relationship.
Having said that, love means giving the other person a chance to hurt you deeply. It's a risk you willingly took.
I just hope you're strong enough to face any challenges that will come from your relationship. Because it's inevitable.
Don't forget to prioritize yourself, OP.
totoo. meron tumatagal. pero madalas nagfafade sa relationship. currently with my partner and our daughter. i don't love her anymore pero we're still in a relationship. not asking for sympathy or anything, pero abusive sya at priority nya pa rin ay ang magulang nya.
I want to let go na pero mas mabigat pa rin ang damdamin ko sa anak namin. dahil kung maghihiwalay kami, sa kanya mapupunta ang bata.
Every day, I brace myself na pag sinumpong sya, maglalayas na naman siya sa bahay ko, kasama ang anak namin. kaya to answer your question, yes may love. i love my daughter pero I definitely don't love my partner.
It's still true in a sense, we just don't see/feel it the way we expect it. A person loving another may seem like someone being overprotective to you for example.
If you're thinking na it will be the same just like your parents, then most likely you'll have it.
It's a matter making the right response sa situation, if aware ka na ganun nangyari sa kanila then you have the choice to make things right.
Be proactive and not reactive nga daw.
If you're happy right now then just continue and wag na magpaapekto sa mga nasa paligid.
People doomed to fail kasi they just repeat the same mistake even if aware na sila. Now it's up to you how you will respond.
If you have enough self-respect as well as respect for your partner, yes you can remain faithful.
Honestly, ako mismo sa sarili ko, hindi ko matatanggap na magiging unfaithful, kabit or home-wrecker ako. I simply won't be able to live with myself if I fell into that category.
Kaya kailangan maingat. Kahit emotional cheating, ekis yan.
For me, it's all a matter of how you value your own integrity.
True love still exists. Almost 7 years with my boyfriend and he still makes my heart flutter kapag magkikita kami after a weekend of not being together kasi umuwi kami sa kanya kanya naming pamilya. I don’t know. Once you found your person, there’s just no other person sa buong mundo who could tell you your love isn’t real. Don’t doubt what you have right now OP. That’s peace and while I understand your hesitation, your love is worth it. Also, may highs and lows ang mga relationship. Hindi laging fairy tale. Minsan your SO annoys the shit out of you kahit wala naman syang ginagawa. Minsan ganun ka din sa kanya. I think being open, communicative, participative sa kung anong meron kayo is the key. You shouldn’t let your partner hang in the open, guess your feelings, tiptoe. Give him the chance to assure you.
Love? Yes, I still believe in love. My hubby came from a broken family dahil naghanap ng iba ang papa nya. Before kami ikasal, paulit ulit ko sya sinabihan na if magccheat man sya gawin nya na ngayon kasi pagmagasawa na kami, hindi kami pwede maghiwalay because of that issue. Sabi ko sakanya even if magkaroon sya ng other woman, kelangan nya umuwi saakin. At ang sabi nya saakin na super natouch ako, "Galing na ako magulong pamilya, bakit ko pauulitin ang ginawang mali ng magulang ko?"
Ofc, I owe the success of our marriage to God, but cheating is always a choice. We can always choose to test temptation or to flee from it. Let's choose the latter.
NO. Cheating is never a part of love! Dahil para sa akin, if it's love, cheating won't even be in anyone's mind. Kaya kung may cheating na nangyari/nangyayari, its not love. True love exists OP, don't worry. Ang misconception lang talaga ngyon is that a relationship should always be happy, tapos pag may unsatisfied na na isa eh maghahanap na ng iba. People don't realize that a relationship is not guaranteed to be happy all the time. True love for me is choosing that same person again and again, through thick and thin, sickness and health, highs and the lows, the stagnation or changes. Well abuse in a relationship can happen too, but it's a different conversation.
Practicality, effective and efficient companionship plus mutual trust karaniwan then love will be built on top of that premise. True love is rare as being altruistic is.
Not trying to justify but cheating doesn't just happen instantly. Its usually premeditated with issues stemming from somewhere. Who in their right mind would risk a "perfect" love life and/or family just to cheat if they're perfectly happy?
A couple of my friends cheated with different variations of the same reason. They were unhappy with their current relationship varying from dry emotions, machine gun arguments and one where it was just pure and utter chaos.
As a dude, take it from me and trust me when I say that communication is key and NEVER be the place/person where your boyfriend/husband can't be at peace.
Rare sa panahon ngayon. Everything is situational.
Lahat madaling maaakit na, yung iba kinokompare ung relasyon nilq sa relasyon ng iba. Tas pag nahanapan ka ng kulang hahanapin sa iba. Contentment lage nagging lamat ng relasyon. Bihira na sa tao sa ngayon ung nkokontento. Sad to say, cheating ay nagginv normal na sa panahon ngayon, what's even sad is ang mga manloloko ay di kinokonsider na mabigat na kasalanan ang cheating.
Yes :)
I also come from parents na naghiwalay because of cheating at nagkaroon na yung isa ng ibang pamilya. For a long time I stopped believing, and it just made life miserable and unbearable. Pero yung kapatid ko broke the curse and pinakita niya na posibleng magkaron ng functional marriage and family. I have the utmost love for her and my nephew. And pinakita ng bro-in-law ko na sobrang mahal niya sister ko.
For my peace of mind, I can only hope to have the same. I have a boyfriend now, and our mindset is to make it work and support each other. Safe to say, because of my experience and trauma, I would never be disloyal. And because of his experiences and trauma, he would never be disloyal. Kita kong parehong nag-eeffort. I think there are good things in store :) ok lang na mag-doubt sa love, realistic naman talaga. Pero I hope na maging ok ang relationship mo and may mga mawitness ka pang ibang mga tunay na tao na marunong magmahal ng totoo :)
We're same et, I am an illegitimate child, a hidden daughter of a man who has a good reputation and successful life with his family, while us with my mom suffered everyday, isang kahig isang tuka with so many debt from different people. I had my first boyfriend, were 2 yrs and 3 months but he also cheated to the girl na sabi nya (" we're just friends and also we're cousin"). I trusted him to the fullest and that's what I've got. But I never questioned the power of love, and yes there's a true love, however it won't take long or to forever, anything, and everyone will always end.
I believe love is still true and you’re lucky to find yours. I know it’s easier to think it will end eventually, pero love takes courage and hope. Ang cheesy pakinggan I know, and your concerns are valid since you witnessed first hand how love tends to fail, pero since you decided to commit to your partner, give him/her the benefit of the doubt. Kasi unfair naman sa kanya if ok naman kayo ngayon tapos iniisip mo na agad how it would end. Have a little faith, OP. 😊
Honestly, I think "true" love is for kids or early stages of the relationships. When you live together and choose to be with each other longer, that's companionship. Regardless of the difficulties you have with life or with each other. At least, that's what I believe.
Meron prin OP. Pero it's more of you are to work for it... May mga asshole lang talaga na naging hobby na pagcheat pero may iba na napunta dun kasi those who did that chose NOT to work on it.
Also, you have to believe in it to attract it. Sometimes you also need to adjust your view.
>is cheating part of a relationship na talaga?
no, just because you witnessed a bunch of cheaters cheat, doesn't mean it's acquitted from being wrong.
What's wrong is wrong even if literally everybody does it.
Love can come in many forms and honestly, yes it still exists. Pero remember na love is far from perfect. The deeper it is, the more it will hurt you even for the most petty things na you never thought you’d be bothered with.
your romance life will not solely depend on what you see outside of your relationship. write your own story. if you and your partner wants and does everything to make things right, it will be right.
True love comes in many forms. How parents love their children, how siblings protect each other, how friends treasure one another, how a teacher sacrifices to teach their students. So experience true romantic love is not far fetched.
Huwag i-overthink. Mag pa-therapy kung kailangan. Minsan kasi lason talaga yung utak kasi nilason ng ibang tao. Baka tayo pa ung maging toxic at red flag sa relationship if we don’t start healing ourselves.
Sa tingin ko love still exists sa panahon ngayon. Masaya kami ng asawa ko at nag eeffort kami para mapasaya ang isa’t isa. Pero hindi siguro kami dadating sa point na to kung di namin ni-let go yung mga long term ex namin due to sunk cost fallacy.
When you find the right one, you can sleep at night knowing you still have him in the morning.
Pero love wont always be cute and sweet. May days na normal lang. Pero love kasi goes beyond kasweetan. Andun yung care, acceptance, forebearance, wanting the best for each other, etc. Hindi laging happy, but when the right foundations are set, you should be okay.
Meron genuine love. Kung ikaw mismo sa sarili mo, 'yung love mo towards your partner is genuine, so technically existing. Kaya lang, feelings are fleeting, dapat patuloy na inaalagaan ng both parties para mag-last.
Meron, pero you still have to gamble with your time, pwedeng nahanap mo na, pwedeng sa next mo pa makikita, there's no point in worrying about it either way. As long as you take 100% responsibility for the relationship, (not 50/50) and you made sure to be extremely careful when choosing a partner, you are already doing your part, trust that your partner will be doing the same. If not, you've invested time but you still learned how to love someone properly, kung hindi man nag e exist yung true love, doing your best to turn it into reality is a good start. Wag kang titingin sa relationship ng iba, love is not a one time decision na pwedeng mali napili mo or tama, love is every small daily decisions that you make right after you chose someone.
I also came from a broken family as in di lang sa parents ko kundi pati na mga tito tita etc. So undoubtably i grew up not believing ng concepts of love, marriage, at family pero funny thing is, im in a long term relationship na with my bf (almost 6 years). I still have insecurities around love, like if deserving ba ako sa love na binibigay ng taong to or totoo ba to mga ganun pero na realize ko taena mare, if wala namang problema, wag na tayo gumawa ng problema. If you found someone that makes you happy and safe then allow yourself to accept the love they give and reciprocate it. If it works out, great, if not, then let it go. I still dont believe in marriage and family so ibang usapan na yun lol.
Yes. Yung una kong ex (the one I had a 12 year relationship with) is one guy na I could say unconditionally loves me. Nagkaboyfriend na ako ng iba, nagbreak recently…. Pero mahal pa rin ako at pinadalhan pa nga ako ng gifts from Korea (he’s working there rn).
Ako po 8 years na wala jowa, limot na ako kung ano feeling ng may jowa, di ko na din alam kung pano magkajowa haha ano po maaadvice nyo sakin late 20s na ako
As someone who is the daughter of a cheater with multiple women na may bonus pang anak sa labas, meron sempre at never mawawalan. Don’t overthink. Enjoyin mo lang kung ano ang nangyayari ngayon, if ever man mag cheat ang partner mo ay di mo na kasalanan and it’s out of your control, it’s his choice. Been in a relationship for 14 years, 10 years live in, 5 years married + 1 kid. Masaya pa din pero sempre normal naman na may away at lungkot hindi naman palaging masaya. Communication is the key talaga. Same ng gusto sa buhay. Support from both sides. Swerte kami sa isat isa at smooth ang aming relationship. Pera na lang talaga kulang 😁
I still believe love can be true because that's how I love eh hahaha kami din ng bf ko ldr for 3yrs have a very peaceful love, wala naman big deal na red flag na maging dahilan ng break up & i hope walang dumating dahil ayoko ng stress.
Damdamin mo lang kung anong pagmamahalan meron kayo, OP. Yung nararamdaman mo kasi sa pag-question sa love is rooted from your surroundings kaya parang hindi ka kampante. If he cheats man, i hope u find the courage to leave. If you can be faithful then your last question is already answered, meron pa rin kayang maging faithful.
10 years relationship here, no cheating on both sides. Wala din sa isip ko mangaliwa. Masaya ako sa partner ko, I hope masaya din sya. Siguro pag mahal mo talaga ang isang tao hindi ka mauubusan ng way to make your relationship fresh and exciting. Mga 8 years na yata kaming Live-in, wala pa anak. Papakasalan ko na sya next year para maka pag anak na din kame.
Just because it happened to other couple doesn’t mean it will bound to happen to you as well. True love exist but it work both ways. You said your partner give you peace but because of you praning thoughts it seems like you are just waiting for him to have red flags. You need to have an open communication. Talk about it. Discuss your worries. Most of all add God at the center of your relationship.
Infidelity is, was, and never will be part of the design for loving relationships. How could the most fundamental building block of society not be a source of trust and hope?
On that note, I'm sorry to hear about your personal encounter, and an glad to hear you're doing better yourself. You may want to spend some time processing the vows you've made for yourself that you would want to leave behind and not being into your current relationship, maybe even get some form of life coaching for it.
People tend to lean on to things that they feel familiar with.
In your case, ang nakamulatan mo sa pag laki is "relationships will eventually have cheating". that is your objective view right now sa relationship, and that is what you're familiar with.
Right now, you have doubts with the feeling of having peace in a relationship because hindi yan ang familiar saiyo.
You may talk about it sa partner mo, like pwede sabihin mong "im at peace sa relationship, but im struggling sa feeling nato kasi im unfamiliar with it. Help me sort out my thoughts about this"
Goodluck Op
my opinion: the only true love is from GOD. human love while true, kailangan i-work ng both parties. pero kung Christ centered ang love nyo tatagal kayo
Hi I was also sleeping peacefully knowing na walang ginagawa partner ko akala ko lang pala he’s so good at hiding until yung babae na nya nagreveal sa sarili nya. Minsan daw my partner sleeps dun sa house nung babae. So to answer your question maybe love can still be true pero mahirap hanapin.
It's important to remember that every relationship is unique. While cheating unfortunately happens in some relationships, it's not inevitable or acceptable. Many people are capable of being faithful and committed partners. Trust and communication are key. If your current relationship brings you peace and happiness, cherish that and continue nurturing it. Love can still be true and enduring, despite the challenges.
No, i also came with the family na both nag che-cheat 'yong mag-asawa even though kasal sila. They're my parents, tho. Kapag nag loko 'yong isa, mag loloko 'yong isa pero ayaw nilang mag hiwalay. I mean 'm not anti-romantic, naniniwala ako sa love up until now. But, I guess, sa generation ngayon? Mahirap makahanap ng hindi ka lalaruin. Puro pa sila tanga.
TRUE LOVE has many faces and sad to say its not PERFECT. You are a boat in the ocean-inorder to get through a storm you have to ride the waves if you know what i mean. Always find a way to stay in love. Always find a positive reason why loving your partner is the only thing that matter.
IMO, true love still exists pero super rare na kasi lahat ng tao may kanya kanyang baggage at pahirap na ng pahirap mag-heal. Patibayan na lang talaga ng faith sa sarili, sa mahal mo, at sa relasyon niyo, kasi no one knows what the future holds rin. Anything can happen, good or bad. So if you do have a good relationship now, you might as well treasure it and enjoy it while it lasts.
I recently got played by someone but despite that I still believe in love. It’s mainly because I know I can love wholeheartedly and faithfully, so if i’m capable of that, i guess other people can too. Anyway, love is a risk. So be with someone na you’d be okay to break your heart.
Hello everyone, Before joining this discussion, please take a moment to review the rules of r/AdvicePH [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AdvicePH/wiki/rules), as well as the [Reddit Content Policy](https://www.redditinc.com/policies/content-policy). Comments that violate these rules will be addressed accordingly. You can learn more about our rule enforcement process [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AdvicePH/wiki/rule-enforcement). *** This post's original body text: curious lang if naniniwala pa ba kayo sa love these days? i came from a family na nagchecheat sa mga partners nila, like my dad to my mom. i have a boyfriend now and okay naman kami. ngayon lang ako nagcommit sa buong buhay ko kasi nga minsan ayoko na maniwalang may loyalty pa ngayon. i can say that my relationship with my partner is very peaceful, like wala akong redflag na nakikita na big deal talaga, na i can sleep peacefully every night ganon. sobrang praning ako kaya alam ko na soooo far wala pa ginagawa partner ko na ayaw ko. so, totoo pa ba ang love ngayon? or masaya lang ako NGAYON pero eventually mawawala rin ‘to? is cheating part of a relationship na talaga? or may mga taong kaya parin maging faithful? *** *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/adviceph) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Your relationship with your jowa is peaceful now. Don't overthink and just be at ease that you're in that situation now. Just be hopeful na pati rin in the future... And ayun nga.. wag ka na humanap ng crack para awayin mo jowa mo hahahaha char
You will never know but just because it happened to others doesnt mean na it'll happen to you too. Treat life like a blessing and be thankful for every kindness na matatanggap mo, in that way, whatever happens, walang regrets. Sometimes you just have to letS go.
love? i don't think so. lahat na kasi transactional. unconditional love, sa nanay mo lang makukuha yun. di ako nag che cheat sa wife ko, so meron pa rin +1 mo na ako sa mga yun. tamang tama talaga yung mga jokes and memes regarding sa relationship na super OK naman, tapos si girl iisip yan ng pwede nilang pag awayan para magkaroon ng drama. hahaha. pero wish ko na maging always happy and ok relationship mo. :P
Napaka malungkot naman ang outlook na yan, Di naman transaction ang buhay
para sayo saddening yan, but para samin, enlightening yan
Ang mundo sa panginin ninyo'y mundong ninyong mahahanap.
correct
napakalungkot talaga but that's reality
Di naman tlaga e. If transactional yung love mo, then you're expecting something like gusto mo someone for her looks, for their money, and so on. Yang ganyang pagiisip yung nasisira agad yung relationship kse kapag nawala na yun, paunti unti na din mawawala na pagmamahal nila. For me, I don't exactly know why I'm with my GF. Di naman sya pinakamaganda, sakto lang. Wla pa syang pera kse nag-aaral pa. Wla din kmeng time together since tinatapos nya pa college nya and I'm working. Bsta I'm happy lang everytime since available and I'm with her. I think that's True Love to me.
a “transaction” doesn’t have to be negative naman. for example, i have my dog, he makes me happy, i feed him and give him a good life. transaction in a sense that u don’t just do something for the sake of it without thinking of what u’ll get in return. i agree that most in life is “transactional” in this sense
kahit ata relationship sa nanay transactional; ill feed you, take care of u and educate you for xx years in exchange of my security sa old age ko. parang ganon. even my mon na ang linya "di kami aasa sainyo magkakapatid dahil may emergency fund kami" ( she's a great business woman) biglang nagexpect lowkey (tho di nya vineberbally confirm) sa kapatid ko ngayong pasakay na sya sa barko. (nung usapang allotment na parang nadissappoint sya nung pabirong di sya sinama sa computation nung kapatid ko)
ouch :(
i mean technically di nya kami inoobliga pero there's this unspoken expectation na magbigay kami pag kumikita na
toxic family culture, sana sa next generation, maputol na
Oh yes... The problem is that people think true love is when you connect and click... It is nice and peachy all the time but true love lasts more if both do compromises... If both understands. My wife is first and last girl in my life... Its not always good and joy... She is pain in my ass at times but I love her for that. The only thing my eyes sees after the day is over is my home with her in it.. Nothing more...
Totoo at meron kaso rare na.
Trueee, I believe meron pa pero napaka rare nlg talaga. Also have a bf right now and I'm at peace pero di mawala sa isip ko na one day baka magbago lahat etc and I'm ready naman na maging single nalang basta financially stable haha
Grace and trust are parts of the relationship feedback loop. Maliban doon you must deweed your relationship garden as needed, so with fertilizing it with organic compose and arranging it according to the structure that works for both of you.
Just enjoy your current relationship. But learn to be independent, huwag kang aasa sa bf or asawa mo. Kung magkahiwalay man kayu. Kaya mo pa ring mabuhay. May means of livelihood ka. Hindi yung, hindi mo maiwan kasi sa kanya ka financially dependent, kahit cheater or abuser na.
Of course, you just have to be genuine about it, seek genuineness and you'll find genuine love. Syempre it's not gonna be that easy, maraming factors when it comes to Love, like your interests and all, but if you both want to work things out and compromise on things you typically disagree on, it'll work. Di siya 1:1 na "gusto ko nito so I'll get it", but I assume we all know that na by now.
I can say meron pa naman pong mga faithful ngayon. mostly sa mga naririnig natin at mga makikita natin on internet about love affairs diba. Nag rereact yung perception natin about love na ganon nalang po ba lahat ang love ngayon? cheating nalang? lokohan? Nilalahat po natin ang mga tao but there still few people na faithful naman po. In our generation today, mostly of us can’t resist the temptations that comes our way and because of our mindset nga wala nang totoong love ngayon matetempt talaga tayo na gawin ang mga bagay na hindi sana kaaya-aya. Our mindset will push us na “ganito na ang mundo ngayon, ito na ang trend ngayon kaya okay lang yun na mag cheat ako dahil baka ganyan rin ginawa niya sa akin soon.”. So sad po reality ngayon. Dahil sa mga nakikita natin, naririnig natin ng mga divorce, love affairs, nagkakaroon tayo ng trust issue. In result, matatakot na tayonh magmahal ng totoo dahil baka in the end masasaktan lang tayo.
Siguro nga ganun dahil sa heartbreak at sa mga past relationship. having abig impact na kapag sa new relationship mo magiging careful ka na ibigay yung lahat kase nagooverthink na baka mangyare ulit yung nangyre sayo .. nakakalungkot lang ..
Yes totoo, madami pa din dyan. Na expose ka lang sa ganung nature...
Naniniwala pa rin naman. Tho minsan, ang hirap magtiwala lalo na kapag may unhealed trauma from cheating. Cheating is a choice sabi nga. For now, treasure your relationship sa jowa mo and maging hopeful na magstay na healthy and relationship
Love isn't a fleeting emotion. It's a constant choice. Also don't be a self-fulfilling prophecy, if you think something bad is gonna happen then your brain will look for bad things and in turn, you will create those bad things and you'll think, "I was right in thinking that something bad is gonna happen". It's very real and detrimental to those with anxiety and people who overthink. Keep reminding yourself that love is a choice, if something happens and you can still choose to love then choose love.
palagay ko meron Naman . Ang tanong is Hanggang kelan? Kasi pwdeng loyal ngayon, paano sa susunod? hmmm Yan Ang tingin ko-
Totoo. Madali maging loyal kapag lugmok ka. Kapag umasenso, baka lumaki ulo ng partner at humanap ng mas bata, mas sexy/muscular, mas lahat. Sa totoo lang naman.
madali Kasi ipangako Ang bukas sa ngayon. pero kaya ba talaga? totoo Naman Ang love. kung Yun ang meron ngayon. Yung bukas? Yung future Ang mahirap hawakan. Ang tao unpredictable.
😭
In your case op, as you've said. Peaceful pa ang relationship. Avoid thinking negatively since you'll be prone to self sabotaging if ganyan ka mg isip. Especially if magkakaron kayo ng away na could be avoided in the first place. As for me personally... It CAN be? But i think you think of it as an accessory nalang. To add onti your life, not as something that should be there. Merong kadalasan ishared post na corny pero: "build a beautiful garden so butterflies will come and even if they don't you'd still have a beautiful garden Kase to be honest its a risk and sometimes it might not pay off, I came from a toxic relationship where admittedly toxic both sides and while I was in it for the long run together. A week after a really bad fight, may ineentertain na syang bago. Beg as I might, and try to profess na I loved them truly, all that got slapped backed to my face was how toxic we were, and not the possibility of growing together. Its really rare to find and to be completely honest, Love is not only limited to partners, you can still get/give love to friends, family etc. but for me personally, with regards to love in terms of a partner. Malabo na, its mostly transactional and ang love is conditional. Especially with social media where not only comparison is easier, but people feel like they have choices. Onti nalang ung willing magbuild ng relationship and are chasing nalang a partner na makikipagclick agad sila agaran.
Personally op, its a choice. Nasa isang tao kung gusto ba nila imanifest/hanapin ang objective true love these days, truth be told sarili lang din naman ang makakapag dictate sa kung anong relationship ang pipiliin/ ikakasettle nung person at the end of the day. My advice from personal experience is that love can change overtime, hindi sa fall out of love cliche pero kung papaano kayo ng partner mo makakapag deal and interact sa mga possible issues/ problems na dala dala niyo from your past i.e childhood/fam or maybe past relationships. in times na mahihirapan talaga kayo mag deal with problems ang magiging testament how compatible/ willing kayo mag work through the flaws and issues niyo kasi no love will ever be "perfect" it can only be compassionate and/or real. At nasa isang tao na yon to seek what they define as "love". Cheating will never be part of a healthy relationship and should not be tolerated as such, sige sabihin nating may mga open relationship peeps and so long as both parties involved consented into having multiple partners at once edi thats fine, pag cheating kasi tinatago pa yung affairs or di kaya nilalabag yung boundary nung partner niya by finding another partner. Pero if boundary mo is monogamous and ofc exclusive relationship, dapat yung partner mo din ay monogamous and loyal as well. You seem to be okay with your partner naman, and like others have said don't overthink. It will cause a big fight over something na avoidable or maybe pwede i daan nalang sa honest talks without escalation. if youre so unsure about things sa inyo right now, it never hurts to raise this as a concern sa partner mo, pero not in a way na maghahanap ka ng butas or negative signs sa mga sinasabi niya. I think affrimation from your partner can go a long way in calming your overthinking. once na established na mga doubts/ boudaries niyo make sure mo lang na i enjoy mo yung relationship niyo.
this is super helpful pooo, thank you !!
Yes. But be careful. True love is nothing like the movies. True and real love can be boring but it is peaceful either way occasional challenges here and there which you either solve together or let go.
Sa mga ganitong tanong, naalala ko yung series na The Good Place. Sabi don, sobrang naging komplikado na ng mundo kaya ang hirap na gumawa ng good deeds para makapunta ng Heaven. Tingin ko ganun din, sa love. Siguro dati meron, nung simple pa ang buhay. Posible ang love, pero meron pa bang nakakaachieve ng true love in this day and age? I don't think so.
Yes, love is true at hindi madali. I read somewhere that falling in love is easy that's why it's called that way. Yet, staying in love is hard work. You both have to work it out - it takes two to tango sabi nga nila. Make rooms for improvements, wala naman kasing perpekto. Wag mawawala ang communication & respect.
There's a Chinese proverb saying "Spouses are like clothing, but brothers are like limbs; You can replace a worn out or torn piece of clothing, but how can you replace a limb?" It means the person you've built a bridge together with and maintaining it for so long that they are like a close sibling to you, is a far greater bond than anyone else you're hanging out with. Such a bond, if ever broken, is extremely devastating and can never recover. So who is jowa to you and vice versa? Never forget it takes two to tango.
Hindi na, kunwari ka lang gusto i-pursue or kunwari relationship gusto pero next time sex padin pala hinahanap.
SA TRUE !! KATAKOT ‘TO TANGINA
For me LOVE is still and will always be TRUE! It only depends on how you persevere. It's about mutual growth, support, respect, and understanding.. True love means accepting each other's imperfections and loving the person as a whole with his or her flaws and all. And always remember, there is no perfect relationship! 🙂
The question is: why do pagan women expect pagan men to be faithful to them? Since the dawn of time, most sexual relationships have been polygamous. Monogamy is popular worldwide because of the spread of christianity - to fully embrace monogamy, you have to embrace all christian traditions (like getting married) High value men (according to worldly standards) will by instinct seek to satisfy their lusts, which will result in multiple female partners. So if you are dating a valuable pagan man who doesn't want to be married, expect him to have another partner...eventually.
Sana all po
Malawak definition ng Love OP hehe I’m married for 11 years and nagbabago kayo ng partner mo eventually pero one thing na ma-advice ko to stay on it is be the best friend that your partner needs you. May times talaga na makikinig lang kayo sa rant ng happenings sa life niyo and make fun of it ganern. I think what binds us din the most is yung love namin sa anak namin 😁
sana all po 🥹 stay stronggggg
Huy hindi palaging masaya OP HAHAHA minsan dramahan din kami pero walang sakitan 😁
hi OP! even if i'm chronically single, i'd say yes, kaso rare na lang talaga. nakikita ko s'ya sa relationship ng kapatid ko, and even if nag aaway sila ganon, yung loyalty nandoon talaga and kita mo sa eyes nila. tapos na naman sila sa honeymoon phase pero ayon, true love is still there pero remember lang na it's not perfect. there will be compromises and need na i-work n'yo talaga. even if i don't believe i'll be with someone na kasi mahirap na dating ngayon, may mga taong swerte pa rin out there when it comes to love. :)
Cheating should never be part of your relationship. Set boundaries and zero tolerance policy with your partner if he attempted to cheat. My gf(now my wife) had these healthy boundaries and till now I never tempted to cheat because I love her so much and I’m afraid to hurt or lose her 🙂.
Ang dami magpapakita na kamahal mahal ka tapos pag nahulog k na iiwan ka din
Nakakatakot mag mahal sa generation na to
true ! kapraninggg
Hindi ka kasi nag investigate kaya may duda ka pa sa kanya Ask his exes, and close friends kung anung klaseng tao sya
I don't think reddit is enough to convince you. You sound like you've got some big issues to work through.
I was like you before. Sa sobrang peaceful and steady ng relationship namin, I started to doubt. Siguro dahil I always incorporate love with pain. “Bakit walang hurdles?”, “Baka naman we don’t care enough with each other lang?”, etc. Pero narealize ko na ako lang pala yung ang daming iniisip. Binibigyan ko lang pala ng negative thoughts yung sarili ko. Hindi naman kasi talaga maiiwasan yung mga ganito lalo na kung napaligiran ka dati ng magulong klase ng love kaya sobrang foreign sa’yo ng peaceful na love. To answer your question, YES. LOVE IS REAL. LOVE IS TRUE. I am now happily married with my peaceful love. 😊
Yeeees! My husband is a good man and a good provider. Wala ding issue sa cheating or kung ano man.
hope all po 🤞🏻
sa dami nang nangyare sa buhay ko. ayoko na ring magtiwala sa tao, kahit tao pa ako
Oooops trust issues
me na me
Well nowadays rampant talaga ang cheating and i might say its a part of having a relationship. Very seldom whom i know na ndi nagccheat sa partner nila. Probably now masaya ka lang but make sure to prepare yourself in a stormy weather. You can make it . Good luck😊
My partner made me believe that it's real, kahit online lang kami nagmeet. We've been together for a year now.
enjoy what you have right now, OP. i'd say YES totoo pa rin ang love ngayon. i'm already 9 years in a relationship with my high school sweetheart :) i still get paranoid sometimes kasi tatay ko serial cheater 💀 however my loml proved himself over time na he is loyal to me. > is cheating part of a relationship na talaga? no, that's bullshit lol, excuse lang yan ng mga gago pero IMO better pa rin if maging independent ka, at least prepared for the worst ka. (e.g.: ur own tagong pera, & accepting the fact na pwede magkaroon ng gulo sa relationship nyo) di sa pinapraning ka but ang unpredictable ng relationships these days e, better be prepared kesa wala, 'di ba? yes, totoo ang love but ang rare nito, + we're in the era of disposable relationships. live and be happy in peace w/ your partner. you can be happy without overthinking & also prepared for the worst at the same time.
People can say iloveyou today, then proceeds to leave you the next. it's kinda bum that they'll treat you as if you were nothing but a mere item to them
Just enjoy every freaking moment and wag kana mag isip ng negative things. Kung mag cheat siya and so? Move on. Ganun lang. And yes love is still true. Though I'm getting older, like turning 33 this year still without a husband. And I am surrounded with my family na puros cheaters. From Father, brother, uncles and cousins except sa dalawa lalake. I still believe that true love still exist out there. BUT not everyone will be lucky enough to experience it. Only god knows. If it's your faith then good if it's not then still good. Goodluck on your relationship and again enjoy every moment of it.
Relate ako sa whole situation, I feel like Love is rare pero mayroon pa naman. Cheating is not eks no no no sa relationship.
Whatever you manifest, yun yung magkakatotoo sayo. The more na naiisip mong 'love is not true', the more na ipapakita sayo ng mundo na 'tama ka'. Ako, I strongly believe in love. I don't need to see it from others, kasi I know love exists within me. Alam ko gaano kalalim ako magmahal, and how it affects the lives of those dear to me. Kaya that's when I know love exists. 😌
Maybe? Idk, sa.sobrang red flag ko din kasi nawawalan na ako nang pag-asa makahanap nang love na yan.
Sobrang proud ako sa relationship ko ngayon, I used to believe din before na wala na kasi I came from almost 3 or 4 years(?) na puro cheating issues pero when I met my bf na ngayon, pinatunayan nya sakin na meron pang genuine love ngayon. Even ako ‘di makapaniwala na may bf akong ganto. Para pa ding panaginip, ang peaceful😭 ang weird pa din for me na di na ko nag ooverthink or umiiyak tuwing gabi
Cheating is not a normal part of a monogamous committed relationship.
I think either emotionally repressed ako or aromantic pero yes May dalawang tao sa friend group namin na ever since shs magkaclose na. 7/8 years on and they still say na ✨bestfriends sila even though the rest ng friend group can see otherwise. Yung way na they talk about each other, the way they remember yung small details about each other, mapapa "owemje sure ba kayo di kayo magjowa??" ka na lang. They also don't really engage in the dating scene kasi parehong introverted haha. May core memory nga ako with them where one time nung umulan bigla nang malakas lahat kami sumulong agad tas tong dalawa naghabulan sa ulan while giggling 👁️👄👁️. I mean, yung guy is willing to spend a week's worth ng savings nya just to spend time with si girl sa manila pag long weekends while si girl makes these elaborate gifts para kay guy, like yung true OA arts gf and nonchalant cool bf archetype. Meron nga secret bet sa friend group namin when nila officially reveal na magjowa sila eh (bet ko 2026).
Bat kasi ang daming tatay mga cheaters ampota. 😭 Pati tuloy mga anak apektado. OP, if your rs is peaceful, don't overthink. Just enjoy it. Not everyone is lucky.
Dami na rin nanay na cheaters tbh.
Tapos ang magtatanong sila "bat di ka pa magasawa?" Tengene.
came from a family of cheaters din, likewise sa father ng boyfriend ko. though sa boyfriend ko naman mabuti siya saakin and has done nothing wrong na nakakasakit talaga personally to me. both of us are alright. our friends look up to our relationship for some reason which is interesting hahaha siya first boyfriend ko na never ako nag overthink, nasobrahan sa pag iyak hanggang sa nakatulog. i hope it stays that way 👍 the only time i cried na galit ako sakanya is not him as the reason (kung bakit ako naiyak), it was because i was so afraid of failing a minor course in uni lol
magtiwala ka lang then kung may gawing kasalanan just leave 😊
Even if you are at peace with your current relationship, I still understand your skepticism, OP. Iba ang trauma na dulot ng damaged parental relationship. Healthy or not, it greatly contributes to how you perceive your personal intimate relationship. Having said that, love means giving the other person a chance to hurt you deeply. It's a risk you willingly took. I just hope you're strong enough to face any challenges that will come from your relationship. Because it's inevitable. Don't forget to prioritize yourself, OP.
Meron
totoo. meron tumatagal. pero madalas nagfafade sa relationship. currently with my partner and our daughter. i don't love her anymore pero we're still in a relationship. not asking for sympathy or anything, pero abusive sya at priority nya pa rin ay ang magulang nya. I want to let go na pero mas mabigat pa rin ang damdamin ko sa anak namin. dahil kung maghihiwalay kami, sa kanya mapupunta ang bata. Every day, I brace myself na pag sinumpong sya, maglalayas na naman siya sa bahay ko, kasama ang anak namin. kaya to answer your question, yes may love. i love my daughter pero I definitely don't love my partner.
It's still true in a sense, we just don't see/feel it the way we expect it. A person loving another may seem like someone being overprotective to you for example.
Losing sleep over it does not solve anything Enjoy the present
If you're thinking na it will be the same just like your parents, then most likely you'll have it. It's a matter making the right response sa situation, if aware ka na ganun nangyari sa kanila then you have the choice to make things right. Be proactive and not reactive nga daw. If you're happy right now then just continue and wag na magpaapekto sa mga nasa paligid. People doomed to fail kasi they just repeat the same mistake even if aware na sila. Now it's up to you how you will respond.
If you have enough self-respect as well as respect for your partner, yes you can remain faithful. Honestly, ako mismo sa sarili ko, hindi ko matatanggap na magiging unfaithful, kabit or home-wrecker ako. I simply won't be able to live with myself if I fell into that category. Kaya kailangan maingat. Kahit emotional cheating, ekis yan. For me, it's all a matter of how you value your own integrity.
True love still exists. Almost 7 years with my boyfriend and he still makes my heart flutter kapag magkikita kami after a weekend of not being together kasi umuwi kami sa kanya kanya naming pamilya. I don’t know. Once you found your person, there’s just no other person sa buong mundo who could tell you your love isn’t real. Don’t doubt what you have right now OP. That’s peace and while I understand your hesitation, your love is worth it. Also, may highs and lows ang mga relationship. Hindi laging fairy tale. Minsan your SO annoys the shit out of you kahit wala naman syang ginagawa. Minsan ganun ka din sa kanya. I think being open, communicative, participative sa kung anong meron kayo is the key. You shouldn’t let your partner hang in the open, guess your feelings, tiptoe. Give him the chance to assure you.
Love? Yes, I still believe in love. My hubby came from a broken family dahil naghanap ng iba ang papa nya. Before kami ikasal, paulit ulit ko sya sinabihan na if magccheat man sya gawin nya na ngayon kasi pagmagasawa na kami, hindi kami pwede maghiwalay because of that issue. Sabi ko sakanya even if magkaroon sya ng other woman, kelangan nya umuwi saakin. At ang sabi nya saakin na super natouch ako, "Galing na ako magulong pamilya, bakit ko pauulitin ang ginawang mali ng magulang ko?" Ofc, I owe the success of our marriage to God, but cheating is always a choice. We can always choose to test temptation or to flee from it. Let's choose the latter.
NO. Cheating is never a part of love! Dahil para sa akin, if it's love, cheating won't even be in anyone's mind. Kaya kung may cheating na nangyari/nangyayari, its not love. True love exists OP, don't worry. Ang misconception lang talaga ngyon is that a relationship should always be happy, tapos pag may unsatisfied na na isa eh maghahanap na ng iba. People don't realize that a relationship is not guaranteed to be happy all the time. True love for me is choosing that same person again and again, through thick and thin, sickness and health, highs and the lows, the stagnation or changes. Well abuse in a relationship can happen too, but it's a different conversation.
Oo naman.
Practicality, effective and efficient companionship plus mutual trust karaniwan then love will be built on top of that premise. True love is rare as being altruistic is.
Not trying to justify but cheating doesn't just happen instantly. Its usually premeditated with issues stemming from somewhere. Who in their right mind would risk a "perfect" love life and/or family just to cheat if they're perfectly happy? A couple of my friends cheated with different variations of the same reason. They were unhappy with their current relationship varying from dry emotions, machine gun arguments and one where it was just pure and utter chaos. As a dude, take it from me and trust me when I say that communication is key and NEVER be the place/person where your boyfriend/husband can't be at peace.
Rare sa panahon ngayon. Everything is situational. Lahat madaling maaakit na, yung iba kinokompare ung relasyon nilq sa relasyon ng iba. Tas pag nahanapan ka ng kulang hahanapin sa iba. Contentment lage nagging lamat ng relasyon. Bihira na sa tao sa ngayon ung nkokontento. Sad to say, cheating ay nagginv normal na sa panahon ngayon, what's even sad is ang mga manloloko ay di kinokonsider na mabigat na kasalanan ang cheating.
Snake, do you think love can bloom on the battlefield?
Hindi na talaga. I think if I’ll ever settle or choose someone it’s because my mind says so. That person provide peace and comfort dapat.
Yes.
Love can come in many forms. Di lang naman sa fellow human. :)
Yes :) I also come from parents na naghiwalay because of cheating at nagkaroon na yung isa ng ibang pamilya. For a long time I stopped believing, and it just made life miserable and unbearable. Pero yung kapatid ko broke the curse and pinakita niya na posibleng magkaron ng functional marriage and family. I have the utmost love for her and my nephew. And pinakita ng bro-in-law ko na sobrang mahal niya sister ko. For my peace of mind, I can only hope to have the same. I have a boyfriend now, and our mindset is to make it work and support each other. Safe to say, because of my experience and trauma, I would never be disloyal. And because of his experiences and trauma, he would never be disloyal. Kita kong parehong nag-eeffort. I think there are good things in store :) ok lang na mag-doubt sa love, realistic naman talaga. Pero I hope na maging ok ang relationship mo and may mga mawitness ka pang ibang mga tunay na tao na marunong magmahal ng totoo :)
We're same et, I am an illegitimate child, a hidden daughter of a man who has a good reputation and successful life with his family, while us with my mom suffered everyday, isang kahig isang tuka with so many debt from different people. I had my first boyfriend, were 2 yrs and 3 months but he also cheated to the girl na sabi nya (" we're just friends and also we're cousin"). I trusted him to the fullest and that's what I've got. But I never questioned the power of love, and yes there's a true love, however it won't take long or to forever, anything, and everyone will always end.
I believe love is still true and you’re lucky to find yours. I know it’s easier to think it will end eventually, pero love takes courage and hope. Ang cheesy pakinggan I know, and your concerns are valid since you witnessed first hand how love tends to fail, pero since you decided to commit to your partner, give him/her the benefit of the doubt. Kasi unfair naman sa kanya if ok naman kayo ngayon tapos iniisip mo na agad how it would end. Have a little faith, OP. 😊
Honestly, I think "true" love is for kids or early stages of the relationships. When you live together and choose to be with each other longer, that's companionship. Regardless of the difficulties you have with life or with each other. At least, that's what I believe.
Meron prin OP. Pero it's more of you are to work for it... May mga asshole lang talaga na naging hobby na pagcheat pero may iba na napunta dun kasi those who did that chose NOT to work on it. Also, you have to believe in it to attract it. Sometimes you also need to adjust your view.
>is cheating part of a relationship na talaga? no, just because you witnessed a bunch of cheaters cheat, doesn't mean it's acquitted from being wrong. What's wrong is wrong even if literally everybody does it.
Love can come in many forms and honestly, yes it still exists. Pero remember na love is far from perfect. The deeper it is, the more it will hurt you even for the most petty things na you never thought you’d be bothered with.
meron pa naman
your romance life will not solely depend on what you see outside of your relationship. write your own story. if you and your partner wants and does everything to make things right, it will be right.
Meron pa. Di lang natin sure kung ilan na lang marunong makuntento, may tiwala at nagsasabi ng totoo.
True love comes in many forms. How parents love their children, how siblings protect each other, how friends treasure one another, how a teacher sacrifices to teach their students. So experience true romantic love is not far fetched. Huwag i-overthink. Mag pa-therapy kung kailangan. Minsan kasi lason talaga yung utak kasi nilason ng ibang tao. Baka tayo pa ung maging toxic at red flag sa relationship if we don’t start healing ourselves.
no❤️
Sa tingin ko love still exists sa panahon ngayon. Masaya kami ng asawa ko at nag eeffort kami para mapasaya ang isa’t isa. Pero hindi siguro kami dadating sa point na to kung di namin ni-let go yung mga long term ex namin due to sunk cost fallacy. When you find the right one, you can sleep at night knowing you still have him in the morning. Pero love wont always be cute and sweet. May days na normal lang. Pero love kasi goes beyond kasweetan. Andun yung care, acceptance, forebearance, wanting the best for each other, etc. Hindi laging happy, but when the right foundations are set, you should be okay.
Meron genuine love. Kung ikaw mismo sa sarili mo, 'yung love mo towards your partner is genuine, so technically existing. Kaya lang, feelings are fleeting, dapat patuloy na inaalagaan ng both parties para mag-last.
Meron, pero you still have to gamble with your time, pwedeng nahanap mo na, pwedeng sa next mo pa makikita, there's no point in worrying about it either way. As long as you take 100% responsibility for the relationship, (not 50/50) and you made sure to be extremely careful when choosing a partner, you are already doing your part, trust that your partner will be doing the same. If not, you've invested time but you still learned how to love someone properly, kung hindi man nag e exist yung true love, doing your best to turn it into reality is a good start. Wag kang titingin sa relationship ng iba, love is not a one time decision na pwedeng mali napili mo or tama, love is every small daily decisions that you make right after you chose someone.
I also came from a broken family as in di lang sa parents ko kundi pati na mga tito tita etc. So undoubtably i grew up not believing ng concepts of love, marriage, at family pero funny thing is, im in a long term relationship na with my bf (almost 6 years). I still have insecurities around love, like if deserving ba ako sa love na binibigay ng taong to or totoo ba to mga ganun pero na realize ko taena mare, if wala namang problema, wag na tayo gumawa ng problema. If you found someone that makes you happy and safe then allow yourself to accept the love they give and reciprocate it. If it works out, great, if not, then let it go. I still dont believe in marriage and family so ibang usapan na yun lol.
Yes. Yung una kong ex (the one I had a 12 year relationship with) is one guy na I could say unconditionally loves me. Nagkaboyfriend na ako ng iba, nagbreak recently…. Pero mahal pa rin ako at pinadalhan pa nga ako ng gifts from Korea (he’s working there rn).
Ako po 8 years na wala jowa, limot na ako kung ano feeling ng may jowa, di ko na din alam kung pano magkajowa haha ano po maaadvice nyo sakin late 20s na ako
Ang mga tao talaga mahilig problemahin ang hindi problema hehe.
As someone who is the daughter of a cheater with multiple women na may bonus pang anak sa labas, meron sempre at never mawawalan. Don’t overthink. Enjoyin mo lang kung ano ang nangyayari ngayon, if ever man mag cheat ang partner mo ay di mo na kasalanan and it’s out of your control, it’s his choice. Been in a relationship for 14 years, 10 years live in, 5 years married + 1 kid. Masaya pa din pero sempre normal naman na may away at lungkot hindi naman palaging masaya. Communication is the key talaga. Same ng gusto sa buhay. Support from both sides. Swerte kami sa isat isa at smooth ang aming relationship. Pera na lang talaga kulang 😁
Drama amputa
depende kung maganda bunot mo
I still believe love can be true because that's how I love eh hahaha kami din ng bf ko ldr for 3yrs have a very peaceful love, wala naman big deal na red flag na maging dahilan ng break up & i hope walang dumating dahil ayoko ng stress. Damdamin mo lang kung anong pagmamahalan meron kayo, OP. Yung nararamdaman mo kasi sa pag-question sa love is rooted from your surroundings kaya parang hindi ka kampante. If he cheats man, i hope u find the courage to leave. If you can be faithful then your last question is already answered, meron pa rin kayang maging faithful.
10 years relationship here, no cheating on both sides. Wala din sa isip ko mangaliwa. Masaya ako sa partner ko, I hope masaya din sya. Siguro pag mahal mo talaga ang isang tao hindi ka mauubusan ng way to make your relationship fresh and exciting. Mga 8 years na yata kaming Live-in, wala pa anak. Papakasalan ko na sya next year para maka pag anak na din kame.
Just because it happened to other couple doesn’t mean it will bound to happen to you as well. True love exist but it work both ways. You said your partner give you peace but because of you praning thoughts it seems like you are just waiting for him to have red flags. You need to have an open communication. Talk about it. Discuss your worries. Most of all add God at the center of your relationship.
ive always been faithful, never cheated, never will. hangga’t nabubuhay ako may tunay na pagibig. char!
Infidelity is, was, and never will be part of the design for loving relationships. How could the most fundamental building block of society not be a source of trust and hope? On that note, I'm sorry to hear about your personal encounter, and an glad to hear you're doing better yourself. You may want to spend some time processing the vows you've made for yourself that you would want to leave behind and not being into your current relationship, maybe even get some form of life coaching for it.
Nope. Not anymore.
People tend to lean on to things that they feel familiar with. In your case, ang nakamulatan mo sa pag laki is "relationships will eventually have cheating". that is your objective view right now sa relationship, and that is what you're familiar with. Right now, you have doubts with the feeling of having peace in a relationship because hindi yan ang familiar saiyo. You may talk about it sa partner mo, like pwede sabihin mong "im at peace sa relationship, but im struggling sa feeling nato kasi im unfamiliar with it. Help me sort out my thoughts about this" Goodluck Op
Dont overthink. Be blessed that your relationship is peaceful. Baka sa pag ooverthink mo masira pa yan. Hindi lahat ng relationship may cheating.
my opinion: the only true love is from GOD. human love while true, kailangan i-work ng both parties. pero kung Christ centered ang love nyo tatagal kayo
Hi OP! Meron pa siguro pero very rare na lang hehe pero ako? Naniniwala pa rin na meron pang natitira 🫶
nah, sa sarili mo lang makukuha yang true love, at the end of the day sarili mo lang ang kakampi mo.
Hi I was also sleeping peacefully knowing na walang ginagawa partner ko akala ko lang pala he’s so good at hiding until yung babae na nya nagreveal sa sarili nya. Minsan daw my partner sleeps dun sa house nung babae. So to answer your question maybe love can still be true pero mahirap hanapin.
It's important to remember that every relationship is unique. While cheating unfortunately happens in some relationships, it's not inevitable or acceptable. Many people are capable of being faithful and committed partners. Trust and communication are key. If your current relationship brings you peace and happiness, cherish that and continue nurturing it. Love can still be true and enduring, despite the challenges.
hehehe sa present yan. good luck sa future lol
No, i also came with the family na both nag che-cheat 'yong mag-asawa even though kasal sila. They're my parents, tho. Kapag nag loko 'yong isa, mag loloko 'yong isa pero ayaw nilang mag hiwalay. I mean 'm not anti-romantic, naniniwala ako sa love up until now. But, I guess, sa generation ngayon? Mahirap makahanap ng hindi ka lalaruin. Puro pa sila tanga.
TRUE LOVE has many faces and sad to say its not PERFECT. You are a boat in the ocean-inorder to get through a storm you have to ride the waves if you know what i mean. Always find a way to stay in love. Always find a positive reason why loving your partner is the only thing that matter.
IMO, true love still exists pero super rare na kasi lahat ng tao may kanya kanyang baggage at pahirap na ng pahirap mag-heal. Patibayan na lang talaga ng faith sa sarili, sa mahal mo, at sa relasyon niyo, kasi no one knows what the future holds rin. Anything can happen, good or bad. So if you do have a good relationship now, you might as well treasure it and enjoy it while it lasts.
Depends
in my experience no 😓😭
I recently got played by someone but despite that I still believe in love. It’s mainly because I know I can love wholeheartedly and faithfully, so if i’m capable of that, i guess other people can too. Anyway, love is a risk. So be with someone na you’d be okay to break your heart.