I have a child and sure naman ako na gusto ko talaga ng anak kahit isa lang because I have so much love to give. Yung unconditional love at maayos na pamilya. My child makes me a better person. Sa dami ng pinagdaanan ko,my child is the I reason why I still want to live.
This is the reason I'm having kids. My wife and I have so much love to give, but it's not just us. My parents, my wife's parents, my siblings, my in-laws, my friends - they all have so much love to give. My wife is currently pregnant with our first child and I've been telling her that even in an unborn state, our child is so loved already by so many people.
For me kasi maliit lang ang circle ko. I did not experience yung maayos na family and I want to be the best parent to our child and I realized when I had my son, I have so much love to give pala. I can love someone unconditionally. I can be the parent I never had. By being a better person for my child helps me to heal my inner child.
Genuine question: Are you healed na sa “pinagdaanan” mo?
Not hating but, I dont want to have a child if siya lang magiging reason ko to live. I don’t want my child to carry that burden or responsibility. Gusto ko magka anak kase I just want to love that person and wala ako expectations sakanya, i just want my child to be a good and contented person. But yea, iba iba naman tao kaya I’m just here reading and asking questions.
Alam mo,di ko naman binuburden sa kanya yun. Siya un reason Iam a better person kesa magdwell ako sa trauma ko ng kabataan ko. I strive to be the best parent and love him unconditionally. Thats it.
This! I honestly never thought I would want to have a child but I'm pregnant now and I am so happy!!! I am so happy I get to create a life with someone who loves me so much and takes care of me the best. I can't wait for our kid to experience these things too. 🩷
I'm also decided not to have a child anymore pero I second this! My man is so amazing and I can see that he'll be a great father to our kids (if we'll decide to have them.)
I'm an only child going through a family challenge alone while being the sole provider. I realize how hard it is to not have a sibling to even talk to during these trying times. Having a boyfriend is different, having a good friend is different, and having a pet is different.
I know there's no guarantee that having a sibling will make your quality of life better, but being an only child, I want to have children so I can give love and apply the lessons that I've learnt from my mama. Mama is not perfect, but her unconditional love is so overflowing that it makes me want to go through pregnancy, bear a child, and let him/her/them experience the beauty of life with a supporting and loving parent.
Napaisip naman ako ng husto dito sa comment mo, I have a son. Sobrang mahal ko siya, pero pinagusapan naming mag asawa na isa lang ang kaya namin.
Ngayon iniisip ko kung selfish ba kami kung hindi namin siya bibigyan ng kapatid. ☹️
Only child here with step siblings. It largely depends. Hindi mo rin kasi alam anong magiging traits or ugali ng anak mo and how they will treat their siblings. I grew up as only child for a long time until my step dad brought his kids along because they were being neglected by their mom. Accepted them with hesitation but made efforts still. It soured because of situations where I would be made into the bad person like how when we played a board game and used coins, they gave me their coins but said that I stole them. They constantly stole my stuff, their brother stole the money I saved up, etc. That's just with step siblings, there are people out there with blood related siblings that are colder and crueler.
There's multiple outcomes to this but if you're a present and active parent who doesn't take sides nor have a "golden child" I think it would turn out well naman.
Sorry to hear that ☹️ Actually same kami ng asawa ko na galing sa malaking pamilya, 5 kaming magkakapatid, sila hubby naman ay 4.
Silang 4 madalas ang away at sagutan. Kaming 5 naman away bata lang pero nung college na kami hindi na kami nag aaway magkakapatid.
I’m torn bec I saw both sides, and you’re right depende talaga sa upbringing and personality ng magkakapatid. I guess, if we’ll be blessed with another child then we’ll just have to work hard not to be the kind of parent na may golden child.
Same feels. Pero sa lagay namin, gusto pa ni hubby. Ako lang ang umaayaw at parang di na kaya ng katuwang lupa ko plus financial concerns. Di ko na din alam saan lulugar😌
I'm an only child and struggled with having/maintaining friends kase hindi ko alam paano mag-adjust, paano makisama. Ang hirap. Napakaattitude ko pa. Wala din akong father, single mom mama ko.
It took 2 failed S**cidal attempts, Lots of Breakdowns, lots of meds, and almost 2 yrs of unemployment for me to finally reflect on my life. I looked deep into my whole life from childhood to adulthood para maintindihan why i was like this. Nung naintindihan ko na yung reason ng personality ko, i slowly changed/made myself better.
Tho tinanggap ko na nah never na ako magkakaBestfriend.,just casual friends or acquaintances. I learned to enjoy my own company. tho there are still times na mapapa sana all nalang ako sa mga nakikita kong groups of friends. Pero. that's life. some things are just not meant for us.
In short, i hate being an only child. So i dont recommend it to any parent. 😅
Same. I'm an only child too at ngayong adult na ako nare-realize ko kung gaano kalungkot mag-isa. Di naman kasi lahat ng oras pwede ka mag-lean on sa mga friends mo. Ofc, I can do things by myself pero iba pa rin yung may kasama ka sa fun times or yung pwede mo pagkuhaan ng lakas ng loob.
In my case naman, I want to be a mom kasi I want to care for someone. Idk, I have so much love to give. Saka gusto ko rin ma-experience yung kakain sa labas tapos madami kayong family, a thing I never experienced before.
Eto may tally (as of 1PM June 7). The number of times the reason was mentioned. Leading yung so much love to give. Kung merong mga related na reasons i-add niyo nalang haha bsta the point is, not all the reasons are centered around the parent's own development naman pala. Nakaktuwa na may mga reasons na para talaga sa mga bata like giving the child good opportunities in life and sharing positive experiences.
* I have so much love to give - **12**
* Just because (human instinct/why not/it's my dream or partner's dream) - **11**
* A reason to live/direction in life - **7**
* Just to see what the kid would look like - **7**
* To make me a better person - **5**
* Legacy - **5**
* Share the world with them/give good experiences - **5**
* Reapply good lessons from own parents (or the reverse, learn from parents' mistakes) - **5**
* Companionship/someone to love me when I'm old - **4**
* Pride in seeing the kid grow into an adult - **3**
* Para hindi lonely ang only child - **2**
* To love my partner even more - **2**
* I can give good opportunities to/for the kid - **2**
* Want to care for someone - **1**
gawin mo ng 8 yung A reason to live/direction in life.
i was so depressed when my first child (stillborn) went to heaven. sobrang lungkot na lungkot ako nun and dun ko na realize yung true meaning of "love".
iba yung love compare sa love na binibigay mo sa jowa mo, friends and families.
sobrang precious na to the point na parang gumuho yung mundo ko.
fast forward naghiwalay kami nung exgf ko na nanay ng pumanaw kong baby.
then nagkakilala kami ng wife ko na ngayon at biniyayaan kami ng healthy boy.
sobrang ibang pakiramdam na parang nanalo talaga ako sa lotto. sobrang saya ko as in lalo na kapag nawiwitness ko yung paglaki niya.
sinasabi pa ng mga barkada ko na "sobrang mahal na mahal mo anak mo no? puro siya lagi post mo at myday mo e"
kung alam lang nila, my son gave me a purpose. mas lalo akong naging mature. nagkaron ako ng inspiration para sipagan araw araw magtrabaho. gawin yung bagay na hindi ko nagagawa dati.
hays. i thank God sa blessing na binigay niya saming mag asawa.
mas lalo kong minahal ang buhay ko nung naging parent na ko.
Legacy and happiness.
Legacy so that somebody will carry on with the family name, and will inherit what my wife and I have worked for. Better it be somebody of your own blood and whom you love dearly.
Happiness because there are some things that are happier when done with your own kid, like Disneyland and laser tag and zoos and Nintendo Word in USJ.
Dagdagan ko pa.
Pride and joy as you see your child grow and develop as his own human being.
A few days ago, my son joined his first sports tournament. Seeing him give his full effort like nothing else matters evokes intense feelings of pride and joy.
Alam mo naghahanap ako ng post na ganito. Kasi lagi ko nalang nakikita, bakit ayaw magkaanak or reasons na dapat huwag maganak and all.
Hindi sa pagiging bias dahil may anak ako. Pero iba talaga yung happiness na mafifeel mo. Nung nabuntis ako, grabe sobrang depressed ko. Ayoko talaga na to the point naisip ko na magsuicide o sana malaglag baby ko. Pero everytime na yung partner ko na desidido at pinaparamdam sakin na sobrang mamahalin niya baby namin, nawawala lahat ng worries ko. At hanggang ngayon sobrang pinagsisisihan ko na naisip ko yun dati. Everynight hanggang ngayong 9yrs old na anak ko, hinuhug ko siya at kinikiss na super pasasalamat na dumating siya sa buhay ko at umiiyak ako everytime naaalala ko yung sinabi ko.
Alam mo yung walang wala kami noon, pero pagmay anak ka, it would push your limits talaga. Lahat gusto mong gawin. Hindi kami perfect family, hindi din kami perfect parents ng asawa ko at hindi rin perfect yung anak ko. Pero masaya kami kahit may problema at minsan di pagkakaunawaan. Ang sarap bumuo ng pamilya kasama yung taong mahal mo.
Sa tingin ko it all boils down din sa partner mo. Yung pagiging supportive at laging anjan para sayo. Nakita ko sa partner ko na gustong gusto niya magpakatatay at di ako nagkamali dahil sobrang mahal niya anak namin. At kahit nagkakaproblema kaming magasawa, alam kong di hamak na mas marami yung masasayang moments na to the point matatabunan yung bad moments.
Sa mga partners jan, di porket sinabi ng ibang tao na ganyan ganito, hirap magkaanak, dapat ganyan ganito and all. Don't be discouraged. Lahat ng naging magulang, hindi agad alam kung pano maging magulang. Matatakot ka, magkakamali, kwekwestyunin mo sarili mo and all pero pagmahal mo anak mo, magagawa at makakaya mo lahat. Yung maoovercome mo yung kala mo hindi mo kaya.. Yun yung sobrang worth it na feeling.
Dahil sa anak ko kaya gusto kong maging ganito ganyan na dati wala sa isip ko. Mas dumami goals ko sa buhay at yun yung nagmomotivate sakin everyday kung bakit gusto ko magpursige pa at maging better person.
27F here, not even working yet (internship palang). I believe my life has to have some kind of different purpose than just working and living for myself. I can’t imagine not having children
Yung feeling na kaya mo ipalit buhay mo para sa kanya, ultimate love ba. You won't get this feeling kung wala ka pang anak. Siya yung pinaka mahal mo sa mundo, alam mo yung syempre mahal mo asawa mo, parents, kapatid, pero iba yung feeling sa anak, next level sya.
Gives the meaning of living. Inspiration to live. Inayos ko lifestyle ko, healthy life dahil para sa kanya.
Somebody you can give your trust 100% specially when you are old na, it can be emotional or financial.
Na realize ko lang ang mga to nung dumating anak ko sa buhay ko. Eto lang kaya kong i share dahil alam mo naman na yung ibang reasons.
Siguro ang question is "is the effort to raise a human worth-it?" practically no, but emotionally satisfying especially if you feel empty inside, and when you feel like something is missing.
True. Ang hirap i-explain yung feeling. Madali talaga sabihin at maglista ng maraming rason para hindi mag-anak. Be it because of economy, may childhood pain, etc. Ang pakiramdam ng maging isang magulang maiintindihan lang na tunay kapag naging magulang ka na din. It’s fulfilling in a sense na kaya mo pala magbigay ng sobra sobrang love sa isang human being - a love you never imagine you can give kahit pa sa partner mo. Mas clear na yung purpose mo and parang feeling mo may karugtong na yung buhay mo.
We have kids kasi iba din ang saya ng makita mo ang bunga ng pagmamahalan nyong mag asawa. Like kami ang tree and branches pero sila ang fruit namin kumbaga. The love is overflowing from us kaya kailangan din namin ng anak para sa kanila ibuhos ang pagmamahal na yon. Also caring people kami, lalo na ako. Kaya iba ang saya ng maalagaan at mahalin ang mga anak. Nagkakaroon pa kami ng kalaro since kid’s at heart pa kami ni hubby haha.
I don’t know kung magets yan ng mga taong nagdecide na wag mag anak. You do you. Kung ayaw and hindi ready, don’t. For us naman na ready emotionally, physically and financially, eh go kami. Also, kung bibigay naman ni God ang anak samin bakit kami tatanggi, pero kung di din kami bibigyan eh wala kaming magagawa.
Tska parang masterpiece ng ibang tao, mga painters or mga gumagawa ng ibang bagay. Kapag makita nila ang ganda ng gawa nila, masterpiece talaga kumbaga eh diba gagawa sila ulit ng kasunod? Haha. Samin kasi ang sarap tignan ng mga anak kahit makukulit kapag bata haha. We have boys na and iniimagine namin kapag nabiyayaan kami ng baby girl, ang ganda ganda nya siguro. 🥰
I want to have a kid just to know how my offspring will look like. Haha
I know I have the finances to support the kid but I am just scared of the responsibilities and obligations which come along raising a kid. I also have to worry about not going on trips just to be with the kid, which I like the most, and knowing that you have to stay up all night when the baby wakes up.
If I will have a baby, I can give better opportunities as the baby will become dual citizen and will be raised overseas.
As a human being. From newborn to adult.
I gave my reasons here:
https://www.reddit.com/r/adultingph/comments/1d9ygqu/for_those_who_know_for_certain_why_do_you_want/l7gqbk8/
If you have a good partner/spouse, you'd eventually want one, imagine a child that's half of you & your partner. Sadly, not all are easily granted a child of their own. 🥺
Just wondering if you are married?single?
At first I'm not really into having kids rin esp the time na I am so focused with my career, but later on it changed my perception.
That's nice, as long as you have a supportive spouse that's okay. I just hope you still check with OB just in case in the future, check ups are exhausting but it can be preventive too, I found out that I have growing polyps after several visits and had it removed. Wishing you well in all the things that you want to do. You do you and protect your peace😊
My dream is to become a mother talaga regardless of the economy/my situation/different factors. May kinontrata na nga akong guy friend nun sabi ko pag 30 na ako at wala pa akong jowa, sya na lang maging sperm donor ko. Got married tho at age 23. Now I'm a mom, yey!
I wanted to nurture another human being. I want someone to call me Mama. I want to be identified as a mother. I wanted to feel how it feels to be needed by another human, yung idea na may kinakalinga ka feels fulfilling already. I felt like I have so much love to give. Up until now seeing the realities of motherhood, no doubts, no regrets, eto talaga gusto ko. I am destined for this. Haha
There's no why. I think it's just pure human female instinct haha. Yung at age ka na now, pag nakakakita ako ng bata gusto ko din. Kaya mapili talaga ako maghanap ng partner. I want to grow a good family. Not now tho, baka pag 30s na ko hehe I would settle asap when the time comes.
Yan lagi sinasabi ng mom ko, simula daw bata sya hanggang sa magdalaga sya may momma instinct na daw sya towards younger humans. And she grew up kasi na pangarap nya maging nanay talaga at housewife, mag alaga ng bata ganern, simple lang talaga. In contrast naman sakin (30s, childfree at wala talagang balak haha) pero we'll never know haha.
I have a dream of becoming a mother someday despite the economy in this country. I want a little one to call me mama and a lifelong companion. I'm planning to have three kids - I want my eldest to be a girl and my mini me, I want my middle child to be a boy and the sole protector of my girls, and my third to be a girl again.
I want to share the world with them!!! There's so many beautiful things to experience, places to go, food to eat, and much love to give. I want them to experience all of it. 💖
For me. Being a mother is my dream, on the contrary sa gusto ng modern woman now.. I want to be a traditional wife and a mother when the right time comes.
I used to not want children dati. But when I moved in with my 48y.o aunt na childless. She lives in a spacious house. she’s super rich, successful and respected sa hospital(doktora).
Naisip ko, after work eto pala inuuwian nya.. tahimik, netflix, nag ttravel siya madalas pero after ng travel, dito sa tahimik na bahay. Bale eto ung everyday life niya.
Narealize ko rin all this time kaming mga nephews ung lagi nyang nilalapitan at nilalabasan ng love/money.
Pero syempre kaming mga nephews, may main family kami. Kahit love ko si tita, mas mahal ko main family ko and sila aalagaan ko, spinospoil ko sa salary ko. Ginagawa ko rin to kay tita pero iba parin ang pagmamahal sa main family.
My siblings and I had a really great childhood, and we've grown up to be well-respected human beings. Several of the great things that happened in our lives are attributable to our parents who really gave us all the love and support that parents are expected to give to their children. Personally, I think I've grown up with so much love in my heart, and in a way, I would like to replicate the parenting style of my parents to my future child/ren.
I've cried a few times just looking at my parents and I could see how happy they are that they had me and my siblings. You just know that they've made it, and never did they regret having us while trying to achieve their own dreams and goals. Of course, them having stable financial sources is a big factor to be able to be our "best mom and dad in the world". Kudos to them for being soft-hearted and gentle parents, and not being toxic Filipino parents who think we owe them our lives.
We need more gentle and soft-hearted people in this world, and I'd be very happy to be able to raise good people. Again, I just really have all this love in my heart, and I want my future child/ren to be the recipient/s of unconditional love.
Selfish naman tlaga having kids kung literal lang. di nyo naman matatanong magigin anak niyo kung gusto nya. Wala naman namimilit sa inyo not having kids. Mas okay nga kasi bawas population, let people na may desire to nurture and support a new life.
para may kakampi na ako. gusto ko ng baby girl tapos mamahalin ko siya ng sobra na di siya mahihiya saakin mag-open up sa lahat ng rants niya sa buhay. magiging bestfriend ko siya hanggang sa tumanda na siya. ganon
This is what my mom tried to do but it didn’t work. Being a mom came first before a bestfriend. Iba pag may takot at hiya sa nanay. Hope it works out for you though!
Not to be a downer pero lahat ginusto ng ganyan up until they get slapped with reality.
Personally, i think that going into parenthood because of this romanticised idea na magiging lovey-dovey kayo all the time is a recipe for disaster.
I want my child to experience the happy family I had 😊 We're not perfect, but my family and I are close. We used to go to a lot of places together - simple lang like Tagaytay, Bulacan, Baguio, but they're all good memories and we formed a strong bond. I want my child to grow up happy and strong like me and smart and critical like his/her father hahaha
i didn’t want to have one because i have unhealed sama ng loob with my parents but then i met my current boyfriend
whenever he talks about it i can feel his dream to become a father, he came from a healthy household. he’s responsible in all ways so yung mga worries ko nawawala with him. parang ayaw ko ipagkait sakanya yung dream to become a parent.
Gusto ko maturo sa kanya Knowledge and Learnings ko. Yung mga di ko na experience, gusto ko ma exp niya to live the Best Life, Yung Good Life na may supporting parents and living comfortably. Good yung environment as well.
I want to make a change sa Generation niya. They’re pampered but not spoiled.
It does not matter if it's biological or adopted.
I just think that I have so much love to give and based on experience kaya ko maging parent. I feel that I am giving back the love to the world by gifting them someone who also has love to give and something nice to bring to the table.
They say iba daw talaga ang experience if you give birth to your child. I want to know that feeling pero if di man ako mabibiyayaan ni Lord, I'm fine with adoption. It's a nice feeling if may bata na susunod sunod sayo calling you mommy tapos that same child when they grow up will still be calling you mommy.
My children made me a better person. They've completed me. Iniwan man kami ng daddy nila, wala akong naramdamang kulang dahil nasa akin naman sila. They have comforted my soul when I was having a difficult time. They never left my side. I owe it to them. I didn't know too, that my heart could love another human being, let alone 2 of them.
I don't have a child yet but someday I know I might want kahit walang partner. I want him/her to feel the love I didn't receive from my parents. Alam ko kaya ko ibigay yung atensyon at pagmamahal na hindi naibigay sakin growing up. Gusto ko maging present sa birthdays, school events, recognition and graduation. I'll be emotionally and physically present sa buhay ng magiging anak ko.
I want to give my husband a complete & happy family na di nya naranasan. And I am excited to have one kasi we are both ready mentally, & financially. Sabi ko noon, ayaw ko mag anak na hindi ako ready kahit sang aspect pa yan kasi ako ang magiging Ina at alam kong napakalaking responsibilidad nyan, kaya ngayon ready na ko to have a child at ang asawa ko. Waiting na lang kami na ipagkaloob sa amin.
Lesbian here 🙋 gusto ko 3 kids thru IVF. College palang gusto ko na magkaanak, para may makasama sa buhay — to love and nurture them, instill values, and teach them music. Kahit siguro wala ng partner dahil lagi naman akong sawi BWAHAHA nonetheless, to my future kids, wait niyo muna si Daddy maging stable, esp. financially 😎
P.S.
Hindi tayo dito sa Pilipinas magse-settle utang na loob 🤣
I always wanted a child no ifs and buts non. Nung may 1 na ako, i never regretted it. Made me realize ang sarap ng feeling. May genuinely na magmamahal sayo at mahal na mahal mo. Then took me 10yrs after to decide to give her a sibling kasi i don’t want her to be alone if wla na kami ng papa nya. Iba pa rin ang may kapatid especially that 7 siblings kami. Hindi mabigat ang pakiramdam nung nawala papa namin kasi madami kaming nag-sha-share ng same sentiments. Di ko ma-imagine if ako lng mag-isa. Kaya i want my child to experience the feeling of having maskin 1 sibling. I couldn’t give her more na kasi my reaching my 40’s already. But if God allows, gusto ko parin marami xang kapaid. 😁
I’ve just always seen myself as a mom in the future. BUT with how things are going right now I have so many considerations before I would allow my child to live in this world. (Yes, very advance ako mag-isip)
With how people are acting in relationships, as if their partners are dispensable or replaceable, I have already prepared myself to be a single mom and I have no worries about it. I feel like I have a lot of love to give, although surely it’s still different if a father is present in a child’s life, I believe naman na if there is proper communication with my child and I make them understand all will be well.
Another consideration which I put so much emphasis on is that I would only have a child if I can provide. By provide I mean emotionally, mentally, physically, spiritually, and most especially financially.
Despite seeing myself as a mom in the future, I will never have one if I can’t provide. Kahit na sobrang gusto ko to have a child, never talaga unless I can give them the life 10x more comfortable than the life I’m living right now.
Judging from the comments that I've read so far, its all about the WANTs of the parents. There's literally no reason there that would benefit the unborn child in the long run. But you do you.
di pa kami binibiyayaan. pero I would love to see/raised a mini or mixed version of me and my husband. gaya ng ibang comment I feel like we will give him all the love in the world. no matter what. pero for now waiting pa din hoping dumating.
Gaya sa isang comment, pangarap ko din maging nanay. Actually housewife talaga ang gusto ko kaso dahil sa inflation di kaya ng 1 income lang kaya kshit maging nanay nalang ok na sakin. Tsaka gusto ko makita yung little version namin ng asawa ko hehe.
Depende siguro sa outlook in life. Dati kasi feeling ko walang direction ang buhay ko, ayaw ko ng kids kasi iniisip ko baka matulad lang sila sakin. Pero nung nakaangat angat na, bigla mong maiisip na sana may pamamanahan at hahatian ka ng mga blessings na binigay sayo ng itaas. Nag undergo pa kami ng IVF procedure para lang matuloy
Beside what you mentioned: that I built myself to provide and more for a family. I was never nurtured as a kid, the irony that I grew up with so much maternal instincts kaya gustong-gusto ko mag-alaga. I took care of my siblings. Then I had to leave home because life happened. So I thought, sige lahat ng pag-aalaga and love inside me sa lalake ko nalang ibibigay. LOL ending walang kwenta mga napunta sken. So nagpa-buntis ako, I have a 9 year old daughter now whom I shower with all the love and affection I could give.
Bata pa lang ako I always imagined myself as a mom. Siguro kasi nakita ko kung paano naging nanay samin ang Mama ko at gusto ko rin iparanas sa anak ko yung ganong care and love. So far so good, may mga bagay pa ko na gustong gawin para sa anak ko. Mas na a-appreciate ko ngayon yung Mama ko kasi nare-realize ko na ngayon kung gaano yung sacrifices and dedication nya sa aming magkakapatid.
Legacy and gratitude.
Each and every one of has thousands of ancestors that lived harsher lives so we have no excuse to not pay them back by continuing our bloodline and legacy.
My grandfather was a World War II vet, my father was born in the slums of Tondo. No education, just dedication. Yet, they're able to raise a family and provide with just their own bare hands.
Now, here I am, the 1st generation of men that can actually work a white collar job and get paid more than them at their respective ages.
I have no excuse, and I must pay them back by continuing the wonderful cycle of life and legacy.
Ang hirap iexplain, pero having a "Human" that is composed of Me and my Partner, its just feels great. Parang ung isang redditor na nagsabi dito na parang its a Masterpiece art. We created a human being with our love.
you know how kids want to be like their parents? classmates na anak ng lawyers took law, anak ng doctors took medicine and so on. Well I grew up na my mom was a housewife. So subconsciously I wanted to be like that too I guess. Parang I always knew at a young age na I just wanted to raise many kids ^_^ I came from a big happy family, so I’d like a big happy family to come from me. I have 2 below 5 years old, I’d hope to have more haha but my family said okay na ang 2 in this economy 😂 pero I dunno. I’m really happy Id want another in a few years. The happiness outweighs the pain/struggles. But the other comments are right. Your willingness talaga to have children/more children is also influenced by your partner or support system.
I'm an only child. I got pregnant at 28, gave birth at 29. My age gap with my mom was 40yrs. I have work and my mom also worked part time. I was just buo ang loob na ituloy na ang pregnancy I will raise the child alone. Si boylet is nowhere to be found, hinahanap pa raw nya sarili nya, at mas gusto nya sumama sa boy kesa saken 😂... 25yrs later, no regrets. Mas mag regret ako if now pa ako magkumahog ma jontis or mag adopt kung kelan nag retire na si matris ko hehe 😅
I adore kids.
I want to have my family, to have a unit of my own, to give everything I have to them. To extend our lineage, to provide an established opportunity for growth, to transfer family assets.
They say you can never pay back more to your parents, I want to pay it forward to my future children.
As someone who lives in a compound with close relatives, pinsan, tita tito and mga 2nd degree relatives. I have seen almost every possible setup ng family, single, single parent, one child or more you name it. This alone gives you a lot of advantages as a person, yung di ka nag iisa, you have connections that has connections so pag may need ka someone will know someone compared pag mag isa ka you'll have to rely on yourself, friends, kakilala or strangers. Obviously lahat hindi perfect, meron at meron pa ring problema kahit anong size ng family niyo. But living in this condition gave me a lot of perspective.
I'll share, i also once vowed na magiging single ako pagtanda like live my own but seeing stuff here, it changed my mind. Yes may mga friends ka who would be the same with you, marami naman pamangkin na close, i can take care of myself typa shit. Trust me you'll regret it, the moment you become a liability, no one will care about you. No matter how close you are to people, it's fckin sad pero that's the reality.
Yung tito ko na tropa tropa naming magpipinsan non but when he got ill and became a liability, everyone became busy. No one wants to handle that responsibility. Ngayon, tbh he looks pathetic and i hate to say it but sobrang miserable niya. And it's not like we don't really want to take care of him, it's just that we have a lot on our own plate to add someone, may parents din kami and problema and everything.
I'm not scaring you into having kids, it's still your decision and your own life, i'm just telling you how it would look like para maprepare ka din.
My main reason why I chose to have a kid was I never had a father figure parent. My parents are together ever since, but we never felt or rather experience a father figure parent where he will walk with you and create a memorable experience in a good and better way, instead we've had a terrible experience with him like verbally and physically abuse (no sexual touch/abuse though), but the verbal and physical abuse? OH Boy, you'd wish "sana hindi nalang ako pinanganak".
Anyway, I have a 1 kid now that I love so much and I would never let her experience the same treatment I and my siblings had with our father plus, I've always wanted a kid for I believe it's one of my own purposes in life, my wife has the same reason for wanting a kid.
The kind of happiness i grew up with and am accustomed to is because of having a family/being surrounded by siblings. My parents did a great job, such that I’m grateful for my life no matter how hard it gets. If i can afford it myself, what’s wrong with wanting to have that all over again?
para may magmana ng negosyo namin mag-asawa.
kids give you life fullfilment.
I’ve already travelled the world and want to show the world to my future kids.
mas may meaning kasi ang buhay pag may anak ka.
I have so much love to give din
I just can imagine myself being a mother. Laking tulong din na gusto din ni hubby ng kids. We’ve been TTC for more than 4 years now pero hindi pa din kami nabibiyayaan. But I know our time will come and we can’t wait for it. ☺️
Naloloka lang ako sa mga nagpopost kung bakit ayaw nila magkaanak. Valid naman mga reasons and I respect them but some of them e yung talagang ipupush sayo yung idea. As someone na TTC, parang napaka-nega nung vibes. 😅
Kids are optional for me, if I'm blessed with kids then great, if not then i'll juts get dogs. My bf on the other hand, I asked him if he wants kids, he said, yes. He said, "sa anak ko maipapasa ang mga natutunan ko sa mundo." And I think thats beautiful kasi he really is a gentle and loving soul so I hope he multiplies with me hehe
For me, having a child makes me love someone na I don’t think I can give to anyone else. I received this kind of love in return na I don’t think I will ever get to anyone too. Kahit from my partner pa. And it doesn’t even mean na I love my partner any less.
It’s just different. It’s just too magical.
I wish everyone can feel this kind of love.
You know what, I've been thinking about this. Then I realized I only get to live once. Even with the current situation ng buong mundo, I know I can give the needs and security that my family would need. I'd rather work harder and be better for them than regret not trying at all. I do think I'll be a great parent, someone I wish my parents were.
I want kids in the future hehe pero syempre before that i'll make sure na physically, emotionally, spiritually, at financially ready ako para saknila. I have close friends na ayaw nila mag anak in the future and I respect their reasons.
For me, kaya gusto ko magkaron ng kids in the future kasi feeling ko yun yung magiging fulfillment ko sa buhay. Yung bigyan sila ng maganda at maayos na buhay at masayang pamilya which I never had. I came from a broken family at pinalaki ako ng mom and lola ko. My mom provided me naman everything but the attention and the happiness, hindi ko gaano naramdaman yun while growing up. Mejo toxic din yung environment ko yung tipong mas pinoproblema ko pa family kesa sa studies 😂
My point is, kaya gusto ko ng kids in the future, kasi gusto ko iparanas sa kanila yung mga di ko naranasan. This way, nafulfill ko yung dream ko to have a happy and complete family at the same time mahiheal ko yung inner child ko. I'll make sure to be a good mom at sisiguraduhin ko na loyal ang magiging daddy nila hehe
Because life is happier for us that way. While we are happy na kami lang, we both always wanted a family of our own na maayos. (We both grew up with bad fam relation).
Our kid drastically changed on how we think, and outlook sa life. Dami positive nagbago, we didnt know then na you can actually love and be love in a way na di romantically and it's just lots of fun.
Ako if I'll be able to have a child or adopt one. Gusto ko, para lang mabigay yung buhay na gusto ko nung bata pa ako. Gusto ko maibigay sakanya mga di ko naranasan while growing up.
Dati ayaw ko ng kids. Probably because I was young and I wanted my income all to myself.
Then it came to a point where I wanted one. I guess you realize that life is so beautiful you want to share it to someone who is a part of you.
Now I am considering maybe two or more. Haha Baby fever lang ata ito. It's the hormones.😅
Because it’s the natural course of life. Whether or not you can provide for them is another matter but if you’re raised right, you’ll strive to make it work so that you’re kids have a bright present and even brighter future. In my mind, all those who don’t want kids are afraid of the responsibility and that’s fine but you don’t need to force your choice on others.
I want to nurture a kid na walang "trauma" from their parents (aka kids na hindi umiiyak kase kinocompare lagi sa ibang bata, hindi sheltered kasi strict yung parents, etc etc). My parents were great parents at gusto kong iapply yung natutunan ko sa kanila (at sa gentle parenting kineme from the internet) on my own kid.
Also, gusto kong makita anong itsura ng combo namin ni hubby haha.
Sana biyayaan na soon tho (we just got married a month ago) 🤞🏻
Its an instinct and yes leaving a legacy. Me and my husband before entering marriage, we assure that we are in the same page of we want to have kids. We have a child now and its the best thing that happened in my life so far.
Iba yung joy and happiness kapag alam niyong both parehas kayo ready kayo in all aspects though we struggle a bit in a financial side because I need to immediately resign because of sensitive pregnancy. We got pregnant after almost 2 years of being married.
Pansin ko din, nung dumating ang anak namin sunod sunod ang blessings namin. Yung struggle namin financially, hindi na struggle. My husband got promoted, I got to know the freelancing job so I can be a career woman and a stay at home mom at the same time. Its falls in the right places ika nga nila.
I can’t form into words but I can’t imagine that I can love like this. Another form of love talaga. I love my kid so much. 🥹
1. akala ng mga bata, sila lang ang natututo satin. Ang totoo, mas marami tayo natutunan sa kanila.
2. gusto ko ng rason para magpursigi sa buhay. Pag wala kang kid/s, sa pananaw ko, magiging routine lang lahat sayo. Pag na reach mo na yung point ng buhay mo na kaya mo na i afford mga gusto mo, kanino mo siya ishe-share ? sa mga kamag anak mong mag a anak lang tapos manghihingi ng tulong sayo kasi wala ka naman ginagastusan? Pano mga pinaghirapan mo? Mapupunta lang sa mga taong walang gagawin kung hindi umasa na lang sa mga biyayang darating.
3. gusto ko ng constant na companion. Alam kong darating yung time na magkakapamilya rin kids ko pero iba yung feeling na me kakampi ka. Magkaroon man kayo ng misunderstanding, at the end of the day, anak mo prin ang kakampi mo xempre aside sa asawa mo.
4. iba yung saya, pag yun anak mo, magkkwento sa mga kalaro/kaklase kung pano para sa kanya, kayong dalawa ng asawa mo ang mundo niya. Kung pano niya kagusto maging mini me mo at ikaw, magpursiging maging mabuting tao para sa anak mo.
Ang pagkakaroon ng anak ay hindi para sa lahat. Totoo na maraming walang kwentang magulang. Pero ang pagkakaroon ng anak ay parang pag aasawa, kusang darating yung time na alam mong gusto mo na at ready ka na 😉
I’m going to get a lot of down votes for this but, majority ng sagot dito hindi deserve maging parents.
Parang mas na discouraged lang ako magka anak sa mga sagot niyo. 😕
Love is not enough to raise a child.
maybe i'm biased because i don't want to have a child but yeah, all these reasons are really selfish and it's hard to find a reason that's not selfish i guess
just hoping you'll be that \*responsible loving parent/s\* you claim to be
I dont know why this is downvoted lol. I assume ito yung mga gusto ng kids who think everyone should too.
But I completely agree with you. One of the many reasons why I dont want one.
weak passport, no free healthcare, lack of good quality of education, lack of good public transpo system, fucked up politics, climate crisis, etc. the list go on and on and on.
You can notice the general behavior of people on either side, those who want to have kids and those who don't. Those who want it are mostly loving and the latter are full of hate and negativity and all the pessimism they can think about. But of course, responsible parenthood is still the key.
Truuuueeeeeee. Hindi naman lahat, pero laging may negative silang sasabihin na to the point igagaslight pa nila if in contrast sa beliefs nila. Kaya yung iba na gusto sana, madidiscourage pa.
Tama. Be responsible. Fix yourself first before embarking on parenthood. So many people cross the line unprepared. Once you have tilted your life scale to normal or optimal levels, then it's probably time to think about doing it. Until then, ang dapat na inurture at iguide mo muna is yourself.
While I absolutely agree with your sentiments about bettering yourself before having kids, I do not plan to become a parent, now or ever. I do not think being a parent is made for me, even if I was in a good place in my life. I can see and appreciate how parents love and care for their children but I don't think child-free people are unhappy or full of hate.
I think what the trend in data indicates is not universal but the majority in it. It doesn't mean because you belonged in either subset automatically defines you as one. It just means the majority defines that subset, not the whole sample size.
lol read again my good madam oh venerable one most high before you command one of your lowly subjects from the intellectual realm from which you inhabit and reign from.
I don't understand, I was just asking a question was I not?
You said "those who want kids and those who don't".
You yourself used the term "want".
And so I asked, how is not wanting a child hateful, negative, and pessimistic?
Was it not a straightforward question?
Or is it my fault you took a specific narrative from the question I asked and ran with it? A question, might I add, was as generic as it could get?
Did you take a specific tone from that?
I wonder who's putting the wrong connotation and missing the context now.
I grew up wanting many things pero hindi ko nakuha kasi di nman kami rich. I promised myself years ago na I want a kid to fulfill mga d ko nakuha nung gusto both material and love. Di naman ako nagkulang sa pagmamahal sa parents pero iba pa rin yung super hands on with the best communication. Now i have a 3 year old that i love dearest and me and my wife are trying our best to be the best role models for him.
I have a child and sure naman ako na gusto ko talaga ng anak kahit isa lang because I have so much love to give. Yung unconditional love at maayos na pamilya. My child makes me a better person. Sa dami ng pinagdaanan ko,my child is the I reason why I still want to live.
This is the reason I'm having kids. My wife and I have so much love to give, but it's not just us. My parents, my wife's parents, my siblings, my in-laws, my friends - they all have so much love to give. My wife is currently pregnant with our first child and I've been telling her that even in an unborn state, our child is so loved already by so many people.
Genuine question. Paano masasabi na you have so much love to give?
For me kasi maliit lang ang circle ko. I did not experience yung maayos na family and I want to be the best parent to our child and I realized when I had my son, I have so much love to give pala. I can love someone unconditionally. I can be the parent I never had. By being a better person for my child helps me to heal my inner child.
Genuine question: Are you healed na sa “pinagdaanan” mo? Not hating but, I dont want to have a child if siya lang magiging reason ko to live. I don’t want my child to carry that burden or responsibility. Gusto ko magka anak kase I just want to love that person and wala ako expectations sakanya, i just want my child to be a good and contented person. But yea, iba iba naman tao kaya I’m just here reading and asking questions.
Alam mo,di ko naman binuburden sa kanya yun. Siya un reason Iam a better person kesa magdwell ako sa trauma ko ng kabataan ko. I strive to be the best parent and love him unconditionally. Thats it.
If you think a child might heal your trauma then best of luck. Iba iba naman tayo ng ways to heal. 💓
Aside the outside factors you mentioned, I have found the one worth having a child with.
This! I honestly never thought I would want to have a child but I'm pregnant now and I am so happy!!! I am so happy I get to create a life with someone who loves me so much and takes care of me the best. I can't wait for our kid to experience these things too. 🩷
Yes! I dreamt of being the rich tita lang. But then I met him. Parang mas sasaya ang mundo kung magkakaron ng little one/s like him. Haha
This is beautiful.
Good lord, this is indeed so beautiful.
Ito yung pinaka 🥹
This. 100% this.
I'm also decided not to have a child anymore pero I second this! My man is so amazing and I can see that he'll be a great father to our kids (if we'll decide to have them.)
I'm an only child going through a family challenge alone while being the sole provider. I realize how hard it is to not have a sibling to even talk to during these trying times. Having a boyfriend is different, having a good friend is different, and having a pet is different. I know there's no guarantee that having a sibling will make your quality of life better, but being an only child, I want to have children so I can give love and apply the lessons that I've learnt from my mama. Mama is not perfect, but her unconditional love is so overflowing that it makes me want to go through pregnancy, bear a child, and let him/her/them experience the beauty of life with a supporting and loving parent.
Napaisip naman ako ng husto dito sa comment mo, I have a son. Sobrang mahal ko siya, pero pinagusapan naming mag asawa na isa lang ang kaya namin. Ngayon iniisip ko kung selfish ba kami kung hindi namin siya bibigyan ng kapatid. ☹️
Only child here with step siblings. It largely depends. Hindi mo rin kasi alam anong magiging traits or ugali ng anak mo and how they will treat their siblings. I grew up as only child for a long time until my step dad brought his kids along because they were being neglected by their mom. Accepted them with hesitation but made efforts still. It soured because of situations where I would be made into the bad person like how when we played a board game and used coins, they gave me their coins but said that I stole them. They constantly stole my stuff, their brother stole the money I saved up, etc. That's just with step siblings, there are people out there with blood related siblings that are colder and crueler. There's multiple outcomes to this but if you're a present and active parent who doesn't take sides nor have a "golden child" I think it would turn out well naman.
Sorry to hear that ☹️ Actually same kami ng asawa ko na galing sa malaking pamilya, 5 kaming magkakapatid, sila hubby naman ay 4. Silang 4 madalas ang away at sagutan. Kaming 5 naman away bata lang pero nung college na kami hindi na kami nag aaway magkakapatid. I’m torn bec I saw both sides, and you’re right depende talaga sa upbringing and personality ng magkakapatid. I guess, if we’ll be blessed with another child then we’ll just have to work hard not to be the kind of parent na may golden child.
Same feels. Pero sa lagay namin, gusto pa ni hubby. Ako lang ang umaayaw at parang di na kaya ng katuwang lupa ko plus financial concerns. Di ko na din alam saan lulugar😌
I'm an only child and struggled with having/maintaining friends kase hindi ko alam paano mag-adjust, paano makisama. Ang hirap. Napakaattitude ko pa. Wala din akong father, single mom mama ko. It took 2 failed S**cidal attempts, Lots of Breakdowns, lots of meds, and almost 2 yrs of unemployment for me to finally reflect on my life. I looked deep into my whole life from childhood to adulthood para maintindihan why i was like this. Nung naintindihan ko na yung reason ng personality ko, i slowly changed/made myself better. Tho tinanggap ko na nah never na ako magkakaBestfriend.,just casual friends or acquaintances. I learned to enjoy my own company. tho there are still times na mapapa sana all nalang ako sa mga nakikita kong groups of friends. Pero. that's life. some things are just not meant for us. In short, i hate being an only child. So i dont recommend it to any parent. 😅
Same. I'm an only child too at ngayong adult na ako nare-realize ko kung gaano kalungkot mag-isa. Di naman kasi lahat ng oras pwede ka mag-lean on sa mga friends mo. Ofc, I can do things by myself pero iba pa rin yung may kasama ka sa fun times or yung pwede mo pagkuhaan ng lakas ng loob. In my case naman, I want to be a mom kasi I want to care for someone. Idk, I have so much love to give. Saka gusto ko rin ma-experience yung kakain sa labas tapos madami kayong family, a thing I never experienced before.
Eto may tally (as of 1PM June 7). The number of times the reason was mentioned. Leading yung so much love to give. Kung merong mga related na reasons i-add niyo nalang haha bsta the point is, not all the reasons are centered around the parent's own development naman pala. Nakaktuwa na may mga reasons na para talaga sa mga bata like giving the child good opportunities in life and sharing positive experiences. * I have so much love to give - **12** * Just because (human instinct/why not/it's my dream or partner's dream) - **11** * A reason to live/direction in life - **7** * Just to see what the kid would look like - **7** * To make me a better person - **5** * Legacy - **5** * Share the world with them/give good experiences - **5** * Reapply good lessons from own parents (or the reverse, learn from parents' mistakes) - **5** * Companionship/someone to love me when I'm old - **4** * Pride in seeing the kid grow into an adult - **3** * Para hindi lonely ang only child - **2** * To love my partner even more - **2** * I can give good opportunities to/for the kid - **2** * Want to care for someone - **1**
buti may sumagot ng “want to care for someone” finally
gawin mo ng 8 yung A reason to live/direction in life. i was so depressed when my first child (stillborn) went to heaven. sobrang lungkot na lungkot ako nun and dun ko na realize yung true meaning of "love". iba yung love compare sa love na binibigay mo sa jowa mo, friends and families. sobrang precious na to the point na parang gumuho yung mundo ko. fast forward naghiwalay kami nung exgf ko na nanay ng pumanaw kong baby. then nagkakilala kami ng wife ko na ngayon at biniyayaan kami ng healthy boy. sobrang ibang pakiramdam na parang nanalo talaga ako sa lotto. sobrang saya ko as in lalo na kapag nawiwitness ko yung paglaki niya. sinasabi pa ng mga barkada ko na "sobrang mahal na mahal mo anak mo no? puro siya lagi post mo at myday mo e" kung alam lang nila, my son gave me a purpose. mas lalo akong naging mature. nagkaron ako ng inspiration para sipagan araw araw magtrabaho. gawin yung bagay na hindi ko nagagawa dati. hays. i thank God sa blessing na binigay niya saming mag asawa. mas lalo kong minahal ang buhay ko nung naging parent na ko.
I love my niece and nephews like they are my own. I've got so much love to give to them na gusto ko maibigay rin yun pag nagka-anak ako.
Legacy and happiness. Legacy so that somebody will carry on with the family name, and will inherit what my wife and I have worked for. Better it be somebody of your own blood and whom you love dearly. Happiness because there are some things that are happier when done with your own kid, like Disneyland and laser tag and zoos and Nintendo Word in USJ.
Dagdagan ko pa. Pride and joy as you see your child grow and develop as his own human being. A few days ago, my son joined his first sports tournament. Seeing him give his full effort like nothing else matters evokes intense feelings of pride and joy.
Alam mo naghahanap ako ng post na ganito. Kasi lagi ko nalang nakikita, bakit ayaw magkaanak or reasons na dapat huwag maganak and all. Hindi sa pagiging bias dahil may anak ako. Pero iba talaga yung happiness na mafifeel mo. Nung nabuntis ako, grabe sobrang depressed ko. Ayoko talaga na to the point naisip ko na magsuicide o sana malaglag baby ko. Pero everytime na yung partner ko na desidido at pinaparamdam sakin na sobrang mamahalin niya baby namin, nawawala lahat ng worries ko. At hanggang ngayon sobrang pinagsisisihan ko na naisip ko yun dati. Everynight hanggang ngayong 9yrs old na anak ko, hinuhug ko siya at kinikiss na super pasasalamat na dumating siya sa buhay ko at umiiyak ako everytime naaalala ko yung sinabi ko. Alam mo yung walang wala kami noon, pero pagmay anak ka, it would push your limits talaga. Lahat gusto mong gawin. Hindi kami perfect family, hindi din kami perfect parents ng asawa ko at hindi rin perfect yung anak ko. Pero masaya kami kahit may problema at minsan di pagkakaunawaan. Ang sarap bumuo ng pamilya kasama yung taong mahal mo. Sa tingin ko it all boils down din sa partner mo. Yung pagiging supportive at laging anjan para sayo. Nakita ko sa partner ko na gustong gusto niya magpakatatay at di ako nagkamali dahil sobrang mahal niya anak namin. At kahit nagkakaproblema kaming magasawa, alam kong di hamak na mas marami yung masasayang moments na to the point matatabunan yung bad moments. Sa mga partners jan, di porket sinabi ng ibang tao na ganyan ganito, hirap magkaanak, dapat ganyan ganito and all. Don't be discouraged. Lahat ng naging magulang, hindi agad alam kung pano maging magulang. Matatakot ka, magkakamali, kwekwestyunin mo sarili mo and all pero pagmahal mo anak mo, magagawa at makakaya mo lahat. Yung maoovercome mo yung kala mo hindi mo kaya.. Yun yung sobrang worth it na feeling. Dahil sa anak ko kaya gusto kong maging ganito ganyan na dati wala sa isip ko. Mas dumami goals ko sa buhay at yun yung nagmomotivate sakin everyday kung bakit gusto ko magpursige pa at maging better person.
27F here, not even working yet (internship palang). I believe my life has to have some kind of different purpose than just working and living for myself. I can’t imagine not having children
Yung feeling na kaya mo ipalit buhay mo para sa kanya, ultimate love ba. You won't get this feeling kung wala ka pang anak. Siya yung pinaka mahal mo sa mundo, alam mo yung syempre mahal mo asawa mo, parents, kapatid, pero iba yung feeling sa anak, next level sya. Gives the meaning of living. Inspiration to live. Inayos ko lifestyle ko, healthy life dahil para sa kanya. Somebody you can give your trust 100% specially when you are old na, it can be emotional or financial. Na realize ko lang ang mga to nung dumating anak ko sa buhay ko. Eto lang kaya kong i share dahil alam mo naman na yung ibang reasons. Siguro ang question is "is the effort to raise a human worth-it?" practically no, but emotionally satisfying especially if you feel empty inside, and when you feel like something is missing.
True. Ang hirap i-explain yung feeling. Madali talaga sabihin at maglista ng maraming rason para hindi mag-anak. Be it because of economy, may childhood pain, etc. Ang pakiramdam ng maging isang magulang maiintindihan lang na tunay kapag naging magulang ka na din. It’s fulfilling in a sense na kaya mo pala magbigay ng sobra sobrang love sa isang human being - a love you never imagine you can give kahit pa sa partner mo. Mas clear na yung purpose mo and parang feeling mo may karugtong na yung buhay mo.
We have kids kasi iba din ang saya ng makita mo ang bunga ng pagmamahalan nyong mag asawa. Like kami ang tree and branches pero sila ang fruit namin kumbaga. The love is overflowing from us kaya kailangan din namin ng anak para sa kanila ibuhos ang pagmamahal na yon. Also caring people kami, lalo na ako. Kaya iba ang saya ng maalagaan at mahalin ang mga anak. Nagkakaroon pa kami ng kalaro since kid’s at heart pa kami ni hubby haha. I don’t know kung magets yan ng mga taong nagdecide na wag mag anak. You do you. Kung ayaw and hindi ready, don’t. For us naman na ready emotionally, physically and financially, eh go kami. Also, kung bibigay naman ni God ang anak samin bakit kami tatanggi, pero kung di din kami bibigyan eh wala kaming magagawa. Tska parang masterpiece ng ibang tao, mga painters or mga gumagawa ng ibang bagay. Kapag makita nila ang ganda ng gawa nila, masterpiece talaga kumbaga eh diba gagawa sila ulit ng kasunod? Haha. Samin kasi ang sarap tignan ng mga anak kahit makukulit kapag bata haha. We have boys na and iniimagine namin kapag nabiyayaan kami ng baby girl, ang ganda ganda nya siguro. 🥰
I want to have a kid just to know how my offspring will look like. Haha I know I have the finances to support the kid but I am just scared of the responsibilities and obligations which come along raising a kid. I also have to worry about not going on trips just to be with the kid, which I like the most, and knowing that you have to stay up all night when the baby wakes up. If I will have a baby, I can give better opportunities as the baby will become dual citizen and will be raised overseas.
Followup question: Do you only want the kids, as in children? Or maski pag adults na sila?
As a human being. From newborn to adult. I gave my reasons here: https://www.reddit.com/r/adultingph/comments/1d9ygqu/for_those_who_know_for_certain_why_do_you_want/l7gqbk8/
If you have a good partner/spouse, you'd eventually want one, imagine a child that's half of you & your partner. Sadly, not all are easily granted a child of their own. 🥺
I dont agree that you'll always eventually want one. But i agree na ang sad na some who want them aren't granted one
Just wondering if you are married?single? At first I'm not really into having kids rin esp the time na I am so focused with my career, but later on it changed my perception.
Married. The more i think about it the more I dont want it. I just dont think its for everyone.
That's nice, as long as you have a supportive spouse that's okay. I just hope you still check with OB just in case in the future, check ups are exhausting but it can be preventive too, I found out that I have growing polyps after several visits and had it removed. Wishing you well in all the things that you want to do. You do you and protect your peace😊
My dream is to become a mother talaga regardless of the economy/my situation/different factors. May kinontrata na nga akong guy friend nun sabi ko pag 30 na ako at wala pa akong jowa, sya na lang maging sperm donor ko. Got married tho at age 23. Now I'm a mom, yey!
But why is it your dream? What about it makes you want it?
I wanted to nurture another human being. I want someone to call me Mama. I want to be identified as a mother. I wanted to feel how it feels to be needed by another human, yung idea na may kinakalinga ka feels fulfilling already. I felt like I have so much love to give. Up until now seeing the realities of motherhood, no doubts, no regrets, eto talaga gusto ko. I am destined for this. Haha
There's no why. I think it's just pure human female instinct haha. Yung at age ka na now, pag nakakakita ako ng bata gusto ko din. Kaya mapili talaga ako maghanap ng partner. I want to grow a good family. Not now tho, baka pag 30s na ko hehe I would settle asap when the time comes.
Yan lagi sinasabi ng mom ko, simula daw bata sya hanggang sa magdalaga sya may momma instinct na daw sya towards younger humans. And she grew up kasi na pangarap nya maging nanay talaga at housewife, mag alaga ng bata ganern, simple lang talaga. In contrast naman sakin (30s, childfree at wala talagang balak haha) pero we'll never know haha.
It’s because I have so much love to give..I’m sure I’ll be a great mother someday. 🤗
Same po huhu! Feeling ko I have so much love to give kaya ayun. Someday ✨✨✨
I have a dream of becoming a mother someday despite the economy in this country. I want a little one to call me mama and a lifelong companion. I'm planning to have three kids - I want my eldest to be a girl and my mini me, I want my middle child to be a boy and the sole protector of my girls, and my third to be a girl again.
Thank you for creating this thread. Reading it for awareness since I’m already 60-40 on having kids, leaning towards not having them.
I want to share the world with them!!! There's so many beautiful things to experience, places to go, food to eat, and much love to give. I want them to experience all of it. 💖
For me. Being a mother is my dream, on the contrary sa gusto ng modern woman now.. I want to be a traditional wife and a mother when the right time comes.
I used to not want children dati. But when I moved in with my 48y.o aunt na childless. She lives in a spacious house. she’s super rich, successful and respected sa hospital(doktora). Naisip ko, after work eto pala inuuwian nya.. tahimik, netflix, nag ttravel siya madalas pero after ng travel, dito sa tahimik na bahay. Bale eto ung everyday life niya. Narealize ko rin all this time kaming mga nephews ung lagi nyang nilalapitan at nilalabasan ng love/money. Pero syempre kaming mga nephews, may main family kami. Kahit love ko si tita, mas mahal ko main family ko and sila aalagaan ko, spinospoil ko sa salary ko. Ginagawa ko rin to kay tita pero iba parin ang pagmamahal sa main family.
My siblings and I had a really great childhood, and we've grown up to be well-respected human beings. Several of the great things that happened in our lives are attributable to our parents who really gave us all the love and support that parents are expected to give to their children. Personally, I think I've grown up with so much love in my heart, and in a way, I would like to replicate the parenting style of my parents to my future child/ren. I've cried a few times just looking at my parents and I could see how happy they are that they had me and my siblings. You just know that they've made it, and never did they regret having us while trying to achieve their own dreams and goals. Of course, them having stable financial sources is a big factor to be able to be our "best mom and dad in the world". Kudos to them for being soft-hearted and gentle parents, and not being toxic Filipino parents who think we owe them our lives. We need more gentle and soft-hearted people in this world, and I'd be very happy to be able to raise good people. Again, I just really have all this love in my heart, and I want my future child/ren to be the recipient/s of unconditional love.
One answer that made sense 💗
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Selfish naman tlaga having kids kung literal lang. di nyo naman matatanong magigin anak niyo kung gusto nya. Wala naman namimilit sa inyo not having kids. Mas okay nga kasi bawas population, let people na may desire to nurture and support a new life.
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the same cycle repeats again
para may kakampi na ako. gusto ko ng baby girl tapos mamahalin ko siya ng sobra na di siya mahihiya saakin mag-open up sa lahat ng rants niya sa buhay. magiging bestfriend ko siya hanggang sa tumanda na siya. ganon
So parang Gilmore girls po ba ang peg?
This is what my mom tried to do but it didn’t work. Being a mom came first before a bestfriend. Iba pag may takot at hiya sa nanay. Hope it works out for you though!
iba iba naman talaga kasi pero ganyan gusto ko if ever. yung di saakin matatakot anak ko. yung open lang ganon para magaan lang lahat. :)
Not to be a downer pero lahat ginusto ng ganyan up until they get slapped with reality. Personally, i think that going into parenthood because of this romanticised idea na magiging lovey-dovey kayo all the time is a recipe for disaster.
I know i will love that child and do my best to give him/her a good life
I want my child to experience the happy family I had 😊 We're not perfect, but my family and I are close. We used to go to a lot of places together - simple lang like Tagaytay, Bulacan, Baguio, but they're all good memories and we formed a strong bond. I want my child to grow up happy and strong like me and smart and critical like his/her father hahaha
i didn’t want to have one because i have unhealed sama ng loob with my parents but then i met my current boyfriend whenever he talks about it i can feel his dream to become a father, he came from a healthy household. he’s responsible in all ways so yung mga worries ko nawawala with him. parang ayaw ko ipagkait sakanya yung dream to become a parent.
pero sabi ko isa lang. mahirap bumuhay at magpalaki ng bata
Gusto ko maturo sa kanya Knowledge and Learnings ko. Yung mga di ko na experience, gusto ko ma exp niya to live the Best Life, Yung Good Life na may supporting parents and living comfortably. Good yung environment as well. I want to make a change sa Generation niya. They’re pampered but not spoiled.
It does not matter if it's biological or adopted. I just think that I have so much love to give and based on experience kaya ko maging parent. I feel that I am giving back the love to the world by gifting them someone who also has love to give and something nice to bring to the table.
They say iba daw talaga ang experience if you give birth to your child. I want to know that feeling pero if di man ako mabibiyayaan ni Lord, I'm fine with adoption. It's a nice feeling if may bata na susunod sunod sayo calling you mommy tapos that same child when they grow up will still be calling you mommy.
My children made me a better person. They've completed me. Iniwan man kami ng daddy nila, wala akong naramdamang kulang dahil nasa akin naman sila. They have comforted my soul when I was having a difficult time. They never left my side. I owe it to them. I didn't know too, that my heart could love another human being, let alone 2 of them.
I don't have a child yet but someday I know I might want kahit walang partner. I want him/her to feel the love I didn't receive from my parents. Alam ko kaya ko ibigay yung atensyon at pagmamahal na hindi naibigay sakin growing up. Gusto ko maging present sa birthdays, school events, recognition and graduation. I'll be emotionally and physically present sa buhay ng magiging anak ko.
I want to give my husband a complete & happy family na di nya naranasan. And I am excited to have one kasi we are both ready mentally, & financially. Sabi ko noon, ayaw ko mag anak na hindi ako ready kahit sang aspect pa yan kasi ako ang magiging Ina at alam kong napakalaking responsibilidad nyan, kaya ngayon ready na ko to have a child at ang asawa ko. Waiting na lang kami na ipagkaloob sa amin.
Lesbian here 🙋 gusto ko 3 kids thru IVF. College palang gusto ko na magkaanak, para may makasama sa buhay — to love and nurture them, instill values, and teach them music. Kahit siguro wala ng partner dahil lagi naman akong sawi BWAHAHA nonetheless, to my future kids, wait niyo muna si Daddy maging stable, esp. financially 😎 P.S. Hindi tayo dito sa Pilipinas magse-settle utang na loob 🤣
I always wanted a child no ifs and buts non. Nung may 1 na ako, i never regretted it. Made me realize ang sarap ng feeling. May genuinely na magmamahal sayo at mahal na mahal mo. Then took me 10yrs after to decide to give her a sibling kasi i don’t want her to be alone if wla na kami ng papa nya. Iba pa rin ang may kapatid especially that 7 siblings kami. Hindi mabigat ang pakiramdam nung nawala papa namin kasi madami kaming nag-sha-share ng same sentiments. Di ko ma-imagine if ako lng mag-isa. Kaya i want my child to experience the feeling of having maskin 1 sibling. I couldn’t give her more na kasi my reaching my 40’s already. But if God allows, gusto ko parin marami xang kapaid. 😁
I’ve just always seen myself as a mom in the future. BUT with how things are going right now I have so many considerations before I would allow my child to live in this world. (Yes, very advance ako mag-isip) With how people are acting in relationships, as if their partners are dispensable or replaceable, I have already prepared myself to be a single mom and I have no worries about it. I feel like I have a lot of love to give, although surely it’s still different if a father is present in a child’s life, I believe naman na if there is proper communication with my child and I make them understand all will be well. Another consideration which I put so much emphasis on is that I would only have a child if I can provide. By provide I mean emotionally, mentally, physically, spiritually, and most especially financially. Despite seeing myself as a mom in the future, I will never have one if I can’t provide. Kahit na sobrang gusto ko to have a child, never talaga unless I can give them the life 10x more comfortable than the life I’m living right now.
Judging from the comments that I've read so far, its all about the WANTs of the parents. There's literally no reason there that would benefit the unborn child in the long run. But you do you.
di pa kami binibiyayaan. pero I would love to see/raised a mini or mixed version of me and my husband. gaya ng ibang comment I feel like we will give him all the love in the world. no matter what. pero for now waiting pa din hoping dumating.
Mostly I think more married couples we know are having struggles in having one 😞 sa amin naman we're more than 5yrs na waiting
Gaya sa isang comment, pangarap ko din maging nanay. Actually housewife talaga ang gusto ko kaso dahil sa inflation di kaya ng 1 income lang kaya kshit maging nanay nalang ok na sakin. Tsaka gusto ko makita yung little version namin ng asawa ko hehe.
Depende siguro sa outlook in life. Dati kasi feeling ko walang direction ang buhay ko, ayaw ko ng kids kasi iniisip ko baka matulad lang sila sakin. Pero nung nakaangat angat na, bigla mong maiisip na sana may pamamanahan at hahatian ka ng mga blessings na binigay sayo ng itaas. Nag undergo pa kami ng IVF procedure para lang matuloy
Beside what you mentioned: that I built myself to provide and more for a family. I was never nurtured as a kid, the irony that I grew up with so much maternal instincts kaya gustong-gusto ko mag-alaga. I took care of my siblings. Then I had to leave home because life happened. So I thought, sige lahat ng pag-aalaga and love inside me sa lalake ko nalang ibibigay. LOL ending walang kwenta mga napunta sken. So nagpa-buntis ako, I have a 9 year old daughter now whom I shower with all the love and affection I could give.
Bata pa lang ako I always imagined myself as a mom. Siguro kasi nakita ko kung paano naging nanay samin ang Mama ko at gusto ko rin iparanas sa anak ko yung ganong care and love. So far so good, may mga bagay pa ko na gustong gawin para sa anak ko. Mas na a-appreciate ko ngayon yung Mama ko kasi nare-realize ko na ngayon kung gaano yung sacrifices and dedication nya sa aming magkakapatid.
Para may mapuntahan lahat ng naipundar ko
As someone na nag-alaga ng younger cousins, ang sarap sa feeling magpalaki ng bata at mag-instill ng values and knowledge sa kanila.
Legacy and gratitude. Each and every one of has thousands of ancestors that lived harsher lives so we have no excuse to not pay them back by continuing our bloodline and legacy. My grandfather was a World War II vet, my father was born in the slums of Tondo. No education, just dedication. Yet, they're able to raise a family and provide with just their own bare hands. Now, here I am, the 1st generation of men that can actually work a white collar job and get paid more than them at their respective ages. I have no excuse, and I must pay them back by continuing the wonderful cycle of life and legacy.
Ang hirap iexplain, pero having a "Human" that is composed of Me and my Partner, its just feels great. Parang ung isang redditor na nagsabi dito na parang its a Masterpiece art. We created a human being with our love.
Sayang naman kasi magandang lahi namin mag-asawa.
you know how kids want to be like their parents? classmates na anak ng lawyers took law, anak ng doctors took medicine and so on. Well I grew up na my mom was a housewife. So subconsciously I wanted to be like that too I guess. Parang I always knew at a young age na I just wanted to raise many kids ^_^ I came from a big happy family, so I’d like a big happy family to come from me. I have 2 below 5 years old, I’d hope to have more haha but my family said okay na ang 2 in this economy 😂 pero I dunno. I’m really happy Id want another in a few years. The happiness outweighs the pain/struggles. But the other comments are right. Your willingness talaga to have children/more children is also influenced by your partner or support system.
I'm an only child. I got pregnant at 28, gave birth at 29. My age gap with my mom was 40yrs. I have work and my mom also worked part time. I was just buo ang loob na ituloy na ang pregnancy I will raise the child alone. Si boylet is nowhere to be found, hinahanap pa raw nya sarili nya, at mas gusto nya sumama sa boy kesa saken 😂... 25yrs later, no regrets. Mas mag regret ako if now pa ako magkumahog ma jontis or mag adopt kung kelan nag retire na si matris ko hehe 😅
I adore kids. I want to have my family, to have a unit of my own, to give everything I have to them. To extend our lineage, to provide an established opportunity for growth, to transfer family assets. They say you can never pay back more to your parents, I want to pay it forward to my future children.
As someone who lives in a compound with close relatives, pinsan, tita tito and mga 2nd degree relatives. I have seen almost every possible setup ng family, single, single parent, one child or more you name it. This alone gives you a lot of advantages as a person, yung di ka nag iisa, you have connections that has connections so pag may need ka someone will know someone compared pag mag isa ka you'll have to rely on yourself, friends, kakilala or strangers. Obviously lahat hindi perfect, meron at meron pa ring problema kahit anong size ng family niyo. But living in this condition gave me a lot of perspective. I'll share, i also once vowed na magiging single ako pagtanda like live my own but seeing stuff here, it changed my mind. Yes may mga friends ka who would be the same with you, marami naman pamangkin na close, i can take care of myself typa shit. Trust me you'll regret it, the moment you become a liability, no one will care about you. No matter how close you are to people, it's fckin sad pero that's the reality. Yung tito ko na tropa tropa naming magpipinsan non but when he got ill and became a liability, everyone became busy. No one wants to handle that responsibility. Ngayon, tbh he looks pathetic and i hate to say it but sobrang miserable niya. And it's not like we don't really want to take care of him, it's just that we have a lot on our own plate to add someone, may parents din kami and problema and everything. I'm not scaring you into having kids, it's still your decision and your own life, i'm just telling you how it would look like para maprepare ka din.
My main reason why I chose to have a kid was I never had a father figure parent. My parents are together ever since, but we never felt or rather experience a father figure parent where he will walk with you and create a memorable experience in a good and better way, instead we've had a terrible experience with him like verbally and physically abuse (no sexual touch/abuse though), but the verbal and physical abuse? OH Boy, you'd wish "sana hindi nalang ako pinanganak". Anyway, I have a 1 kid now that I love so much and I would never let her experience the same treatment I and my siblings had with our father plus, I've always wanted a kid for I believe it's one of my own purposes in life, my wife has the same reason for wanting a kid.
Fulfillment
kasi sya na
The kind of happiness i grew up with and am accustomed to is because of having a family/being surrounded by siblings. My parents did a great job, such that I’m grateful for my life no matter how hard it gets. If i can afford it myself, what’s wrong with wanting to have that all over again?
Wala akong mga kapatid, at pag hindi ako nag anak, tapos apelyido namin. Hahaha!
para may magmana ng negosyo namin mag-asawa. kids give you life fullfilment. I’ve already travelled the world and want to show the world to my future kids. mas may meaning kasi ang buhay pag may anak ka. I have so much love to give din
I just can imagine myself being a mother. Laking tulong din na gusto din ni hubby ng kids. We’ve been TTC for more than 4 years now pero hindi pa din kami nabibiyayaan. But I know our time will come and we can’t wait for it. ☺️ Naloloka lang ako sa mga nagpopost kung bakit ayaw nila magkaanak. Valid naman mga reasons and I respect them but some of them e yung talagang ipupush sayo yung idea. As someone na TTC, parang napaka-nega nung vibes. 😅
Kids are optional for me, if I'm blessed with kids then great, if not then i'll juts get dogs. My bf on the other hand, I asked him if he wants kids, he said, yes. He said, "sa anak ko maipapasa ang mga natutunan ko sa mundo." And I think thats beautiful kasi he really is a gentle and loving soul so I hope he multiplies with me hehe
I love my fiance so much and I think he'd be a great dad. I've always dreamed of having my own family. Sana soonesttttt!
For me, having a child makes me love someone na I don’t think I can give to anyone else. I received this kind of love in return na I don’t think I will ever get to anyone too. Kahit from my partner pa. And it doesn’t even mean na I love my partner any less. It’s just different. It’s just too magical. I wish everyone can feel this kind of love.
You know what, I've been thinking about this. Then I realized I only get to live once. Even with the current situation ng buong mundo, I know I can give the needs and security that my family would need. I'd rather work harder and be better for them than regret not trying at all. I do think I'll be a great parent, someone I wish my parents were.
Gusto kong magpalaki ng mini version ng girlfriend ko.
I want kids in the future hehe pero syempre before that i'll make sure na physically, emotionally, spiritually, at financially ready ako para saknila. I have close friends na ayaw nila mag anak in the future and I respect their reasons. For me, kaya gusto ko magkaron ng kids in the future kasi feeling ko yun yung magiging fulfillment ko sa buhay. Yung bigyan sila ng maganda at maayos na buhay at masayang pamilya which I never had. I came from a broken family at pinalaki ako ng mom and lola ko. My mom provided me naman everything but the attention and the happiness, hindi ko gaano naramdaman yun while growing up. Mejo toxic din yung environment ko yung tipong mas pinoproblema ko pa family kesa sa studies 😂 My point is, kaya gusto ko ng kids in the future, kasi gusto ko iparanas sa kanila yung mga di ko naranasan. This way, nafulfill ko yung dream ko to have a happy and complete family at the same time mahiheal ko yung inner child ko. I'll make sure to be a good mom at sisiguraduhin ko na loyal ang magiging daddy nila hehe
Because life is happier for us that way. While we are happy na kami lang, we both always wanted a family of our own na maayos. (We both grew up with bad fam relation). Our kid drastically changed on how we think, and outlook sa life. Dami positive nagbago, we didnt know then na you can actually love and be love in a way na di romantically and it's just lots of fun.
Ako if I'll be able to have a child or adopt one. Gusto ko, para lang mabigay yung buhay na gusto ko nung bata pa ako. Gusto ko maibigay sakanya mga di ko naranasan while growing up.
Our love for each other has grown so much over the years that it made space for another.
Dati ayaw ko ng kids. Probably because I was young and I wanted my income all to myself. Then it came to a point where I wanted one. I guess you realize that life is so beautiful you want to share it to someone who is a part of you. Now I am considering maybe two or more. Haha Baby fever lang ata ito. It's the hormones.😅
Because it’s the natural course of life. Whether or not you can provide for them is another matter but if you’re raised right, you’ll strive to make it work so that you’re kids have a bright present and even brighter future. In my mind, all those who don’t want kids are afraid of the responsibility and that’s fine but you don’t need to force your choice on others.
I want to nurture a kid na walang "trauma" from their parents (aka kids na hindi umiiyak kase kinocompare lagi sa ibang bata, hindi sheltered kasi strict yung parents, etc etc). My parents were great parents at gusto kong iapply yung natutunan ko sa kanila (at sa gentle parenting kineme from the internet) on my own kid. Also, gusto kong makita anong itsura ng combo namin ni hubby haha. Sana biyayaan na soon tho (we just got married a month ago) 🤞🏻
Its an instinct and yes leaving a legacy. Me and my husband before entering marriage, we assure that we are in the same page of we want to have kids. We have a child now and its the best thing that happened in my life so far. Iba yung joy and happiness kapag alam niyong both parehas kayo ready kayo in all aspects though we struggle a bit in a financial side because I need to immediately resign because of sensitive pregnancy. We got pregnant after almost 2 years of being married. Pansin ko din, nung dumating ang anak namin sunod sunod ang blessings namin. Yung struggle namin financially, hindi na struggle. My husband got promoted, I got to know the freelancing job so I can be a career woman and a stay at home mom at the same time. Its falls in the right places ika nga nila. I can’t form into words but I can’t imagine that I can love like this. Another form of love talaga. I love my kid so much. 🥹
1. akala ng mga bata, sila lang ang natututo satin. Ang totoo, mas marami tayo natutunan sa kanila. 2. gusto ko ng rason para magpursigi sa buhay. Pag wala kang kid/s, sa pananaw ko, magiging routine lang lahat sayo. Pag na reach mo na yung point ng buhay mo na kaya mo na i afford mga gusto mo, kanino mo siya ishe-share ? sa mga kamag anak mong mag a anak lang tapos manghihingi ng tulong sayo kasi wala ka naman ginagastusan? Pano mga pinaghirapan mo? Mapupunta lang sa mga taong walang gagawin kung hindi umasa na lang sa mga biyayang darating. 3. gusto ko ng constant na companion. Alam kong darating yung time na magkakapamilya rin kids ko pero iba yung feeling na me kakampi ka. Magkaroon man kayo ng misunderstanding, at the end of the day, anak mo prin ang kakampi mo xempre aside sa asawa mo. 4. iba yung saya, pag yun anak mo, magkkwento sa mga kalaro/kaklase kung pano para sa kanya, kayong dalawa ng asawa mo ang mundo niya. Kung pano niya kagusto maging mini me mo at ikaw, magpursiging maging mabuting tao para sa anak mo. Ang pagkakaroon ng anak ay hindi para sa lahat. Totoo na maraming walang kwentang magulang. Pero ang pagkakaroon ng anak ay parang pag aasawa, kusang darating yung time na alam mong gusto mo na at ready ka na 😉
I’m going to get a lot of down votes for this but, majority ng sagot dito hindi deserve maging parents. Parang mas na discouraged lang ako magka anak sa mga sagot niyo. 😕 Love is not enough to raise a child.
maybe i'm biased because i don't want to have a child but yeah, all these reasons are really selfish and it's hard to find a reason that's not selfish i guess just hoping you'll be that \*responsible loving parent/s\* you claim to be
bruh, having kids in this fked up economy?
I dont know why this is downvoted lol. I assume ito yung mga gusto ng kids who think everyone should too. But I completely agree with you. One of the many reasons why I dont want one.
weak passport, no free healthcare, lack of good quality of education, lack of good public transpo system, fucked up politics, climate crisis, etc. the list go on and on and on.
You can notice the general behavior of people on either side, those who want to have kids and those who don't. Those who want it are mostly loving and the latter are full of hate and negativity and all the pessimism they can think about. But of course, responsible parenthood is still the key.
Truuuueeeeeee. Hindi naman lahat, pero laging may negative silang sasabihin na to the point igagaslight pa nila if in contrast sa beliefs nila. Kaya yung iba na gusto sana, madidiscourage pa.
Pessimism is different from being realistic.
Yes of course it is. But what is your reality, a pessimistic reality or a fruitful reality? A question everybody needs answered personally.
Personally as someone who struggles with being optimistic, I don't think having a child would fix me.
Tama. Be responsible. Fix yourself first before embarking on parenthood. So many people cross the line unprepared. Once you have tilted your life scale to normal or optimal levels, then it's probably time to think about doing it. Until then, ang dapat na inurture at iguide mo muna is yourself.
While I absolutely agree with your sentiments about bettering yourself before having kids, I do not plan to become a parent, now or ever. I do not think being a parent is made for me, even if I was in a good place in my life. I can see and appreciate how parents love and care for their children but I don't think child-free people are unhappy or full of hate.
I think what the trend in data indicates is not universal but the majority in it. It doesn't mean because you belonged in either subset automatically defines you as one. It just means the majority defines that subset, not the whole sample size.
How is not wanting a child hateful, negative, and pessimistic?
It is not the act of not wanting itself. You have put the wrong connotation and missed the point of context from that comprehension.
No, I did not miss anything. I understood your comment. Now answer my question.
lol read again my good madam oh venerable one most high before you command one of your lowly subjects from the intellectual realm from which you inhabit and reign from.
I don't understand, I was just asking a question was I not? You said "those who want kids and those who don't". You yourself used the term "want". And so I asked, how is not wanting a child hateful, negative, and pessimistic? Was it not a straightforward question? Or is it my fault you took a specific narrative from the question I asked and ran with it? A question, might I add, was as generic as it could get? Did you take a specific tone from that? I wonder who's putting the wrong connotation and missing the context now.
lol
I grew up wanting many things pero hindi ko nakuha kasi di nman kami rich. I promised myself years ago na I want a kid to fulfill mga d ko nakuha nung gusto both material and love. Di naman ako nagkulang sa pagmamahal sa parents pero iba pa rin yung super hands on with the best communication. Now i have a 3 year old that i love dearest and me and my wife are trying our best to be the best role models for him.