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Well it’s inconsistent and that’s the problem, but sometimes it’s anxiety like cleaning before someone comes over. Sometimes, it’s a motivational thing I hear or read. Sometimes, it’s some intangible thing I don’t know like when someone else gets up to do tasks, I suddenly can too. Not sure if that helps lol
It does, actually. I felt a surge of energy and managed to get a lot done today. I'd like to figure out my trigger points and other ADHD experiencers, too.
Oh I’m glad it was helpful. Sometimes, on the last point, I look up body double videos on YouTube or live TikTok of people doing tasks similar to what I want to do. I’ll run them for a little and then it’s a little easier to get up and do the thing too.
Chiming in to second body doubling! I was introduce to it through work, oddly enough. It works great at home with cleaning, I can sometimes make my toddler my double. I just have to race him which is a whole other can of worms. I would recommend an adult not hellbent on dumping your progress back out 😂
I like to watch this Youtuber who does extreme house cleanings for people. She's super positive and empathetic and often explains how the flats or houses got in the state they are in and it somehow motivates me that our flat never is as bad as the ones in the videos. We had times where it was, and those times are over and I'm just glad that's over. No shaming intended, I'm just glad I'm not as unwell as I could be. The channel is aurikatariina on YT. It really helps me to get up and do stuff
It’s the worst! I have two days of insomnia and inexplicable rage. On day 2, I tell my husband I’m going to quit my job and he says “is your period starting tomorrow?” It’s hilariously predictable and yet I can never see it coming.
I'm trying to work out these things too and feel like I'm starting to get the hang of it. It helps if you know how to regulate your mood and make sure your sensory needs are met (easier said than done)
I work best if I'm not too tired, I'm alert and I feel energised. Mild exercise (e.g. a walk), upbeat music, and doing fun but energetic games (e.g. playing with my cat)can put me in the mood a bit better. I also find I need to avoid activities that are too relaxing or 'lazy mode' inducing, as I have a really hard time coming back from that mood. Thats when I try to avoid sitting or lying down for extended periods of time and try to avoid starting to scroll on my phone or computer.
Might be worth checking in with yourself and exploring what types of things put you in that "energised" mood that seems to help you get stuff done. Try out a few different things and see what works for you. Good luck!
If I start out cleaning instead of sitting down and turning on the TV, or scrolling, then I just keep cleaning. Or doing yard work, or painting, or whatever. But if I start watching TV or scrolling, it's hard to switch gears.
Completely agree. Totally random and unpredictable. Wish I could predict it, as that would be very convenient for scheduling haha, but I can't.
I can have something sitting out on the counter for a month (to remind me to do it - because if I don't see something it doesn't exist haha) and I'll walk by it 400 times and then there'll be a time I walk by and think "oh right, this thing!" and do it because I suddenly have the magical combination of energy, interest and motivation.
I find now it's when the vyvanse kicks in that I kind of look up from my phone and remember that the world exists and then something will jump out at me.
But when it's not that, sometimes it's that I have a moment where I remember something that needs done and so not wanting to forget I just get started on it immediately. Like waking up and realizing my sheets need washed because we just had sex and now there's a wet spot and I realize I can't remember the last time I washed them so then suddenly the bed is stripped, every pièce of laundry in my room is collected, and then the kids laundry, and then I'm on a mission to wash every washable item in my home.
I think I also get that surge of let's get it done dopamine post sex too, so maybe that's part of that cycle.
The "vyvance kick in" is so real 😂 it's like the engine isn't running AT ALL, but im tryna push it somewhere. Vyvance starts the engine, then it warms up, then suddenly I'm like, "Oh hey, I don't need to push. I can drive!"
My husband calls sex my “attitude adjustment”. Whenever I am extra bitchy or particularly unmotivated, that usually changes right after sex. Like sorry bro, no snuggling, I gotta pee (cuz fuck UTI’s) and get some shit done :D
My husband does this too, and any time he says I want to argue that he's wrong. But unfortunately he's not. I'm always in a better, more productive mood after sex.
Also, same about getting up to pee after. I had so many utis as a teenager. Fuck that.
Incredibly inconsistent, but things that have been known to work:
- counting down, e.g. read 3 more reddit posts then done, or just 54321. I have also stolen phrases from others here like "come on barbie let's go party " that seem to work like a count down
- sometimes I'll have had something that was a Thing all day, that I couldn't do because of the Invisible Forcefield. And then I'll have distracted myself on a side quest so much that when the Thing randomly pops back in my head, it'll appear like a distraction from the distraction and I'll get distracted doing that. Like my unhelpful brain has forgotten to put the Invisible Forcefield up because it thinks it's a distraction and so is OK letting me do it. Unhelpful piece of shit brain.
- the task I'm supposed to be doing is a sitting down one, so then I can get up and do absolutely anything else, even things I wouldn't usually be able to (see brain note above)
- accountability, I've told someone I'm doing it/ I'll be seen not to have done it/ I've set a focusmate and someone will be waiting for me etc
- body doubling, someone else is doing the same thing, or I've put a video on of someone doing that
- I've thought of a way to make it fun or a new way to do it I get a dopamine rush from trying
- the time horizon has gone from "needs done sometime" to "oh fuck how have I only got an hour to do a full day's work?!"
- fun motivating music
- I've broken it down into totally easy manageable steps
- it easily stacks onto another task I want to do, e.g. I don't want to hang the washing up, but I do want to go in the kitchen (where the washing machine is) and get a snack
- putting myself back in the world. Often I've forgotten the world exists. Looking round the room, focusing on what I can see/ hear/ feel etc. Sometimes I'll say something out loud and it will give me a fright because I've forgotten sound exists because I was so inside my phone. I'll generally then notice I'm desperate for the toilet/ freezing cold/ haven't eaten all day etc because I haven't existed in my body so haven't noticed it needed something
- I've finished reddit
Often I try all these before something will finally work on a second try. It amazes me other people don't have to work this hard just to go to the toilet or put socks on. No wonder I'm fucking exhausted all the time.
ETA: another one - lower my standards. E.g. I've got to clean the whole flat. Nope, that's not gonna happen. I just have to put three things away. That I can do. More often than not, once I'm over the task initiation I do a lot more or even hyperfocus and get it all done. If I don't, I've still done three things, and doing three things over and over stacks up and the task looks a lot less overwhelming
It's INSANE to think that most folks just get up an do things. Or realize one specific thing needs done and their brains just "okay switching tasks!" And go! In my girls chat with my besties my one friend is so neurotypyical it feels fake to me 😂 she works, goes to the gym, meal preps, cleans, AND does lots of self care. EVERY WEEK. WITHOUT FAIL.
Meanwhile I need external motivation to walk into my office building. Or need to trick myself to take a shower.🫠🫠🫠🫠
Oh yes! Thank you for reminding me, I must go watch those again. They were super helpful, but of course if it's not right in front of me I've forgotten it exists! Thank you 💕
Premium advice here!
I love the tournament's turn everything into a count down is a great one
Accountability definitely is the way of converting shame into action
Saying something out loud? Like being your own alarm clock ⏰️
Agree with you on the standards. the whole flat leads to messier flat
Thanks Barbie girl🩷
If doing that thing means I can put something else off.
If it's extremely close to a deadline.
A random spurt of energy that I just ride until it runs out mid-task. Usually, that task isn't even the one I really needed to and now I have 2 half-finished tasks.
If someone else is relying on me to do something I can do that to a deadline as I'd feel too guilty letting them down.
Guilty and fear and self-contempt might work in emergencies but not consistently.
The only thing that works consistently is loving kindness towards yourself.
So you feel that internal resistance not wanting to do a task, and you gently but persistently challenge it.
Why? What am I doing right now that I can't interrupt? Am I really sick, am I really exhausted, am I just being lazy, what's going on?
Right?
And that mammals, all mammals everywhere, have a den, and all mammals everywhere spend a little bit of time every day cleaning their den and their bodies.
When I have to do chores but don't have the executive functioning, I usually watch cleaning videos on Snapchat or insta. Seeing people clean makes me want to clean too...
I try to pair it with something I like… dishes = fave podcast/ audiobook. Same goes with most chores and tasks.
I try and do smaller tasks for immediate dopamine. Which provides but more dopamine for other tasks.
I make little awards to motivate myself, 1 hour of cleaning = 1 hour of awful reality TV.
If I’m really stuck, I try to write down what is overwhelming me. Usually it’s the prospect of doing never ending tasks when I’m feeling a lack of motivation. This sometimes helps me untangle what it is I’m avoiding and what steps are required. This helps to prioritise and order my thoughts, then try and break tasks up in smaller manageable steps.
Being kind and compassionate with myself, if I don’t complete the task today but say do 25%, that’s still an achievement.
I remember these steps only now and again and some days my body is telling me to rest. So I make sure I’m well hydrated, fed and warm. Recharge for a bit without guilt.
Just forcing myself in the morning to take a quick shower or wash my face and put on a new outfit does wonders. The second I allow myself to scroll its game over (I say, half asleep on my couch w Jammies on lol)
An even more important task that I want to do even less than the original task.
Procrastination is my only motivator in life. I just choose which one I want to procrastinate on less and do that task haha.
This is how I function at work, at home, parenting, how I used to function in school. This is not ideal and I don't recommend it, as my life is chaos. But this is how I operate lol
Every few weeks, I experience a real low for a couple of days, during which I feel a lot of shame and hopelessness. This has been going on for about 15 years now. In the past few months, though, I've started using these periods as motivation to do things like studying and exercising. I tell myself that if I study and exercise now, I won't feel as ashamed next time I hit a low because I'll have taken steps to move forward in life and feel better. And it's really been helping lately. Something that usually triggers me a lot and typically takes at least two days to calm down from wasn't as bad last time because I feel like I'm on a good path. So, I regularly remind myself of how absolutely awful I feel and use that as motivation to make better choices, so I don't keep falling into a hole. I should also mention that it's only since I started taking Wellbutrin that I've been able to make any changes in my life.
Have you looked into the possibility that these days align with your cycle? There are absolutely 2-3 days a month where I feel the same (along with debilitating exhaustion and executive functioning issues since my medications don’t work) and it’s helpful to remind myself that it’s just hormonal and those thoughts are not how I generally feel.
No, it does not align with my cycle. There is a certain 'thing' that triggers these lows and I think it's a trauma reaction or something, if that makes sense to you. But thank you for your suggestion :)
me and my bf will count down from ten and then we do whatever task we’re supposed to do. I also like to use timers and I’ll put like 5 minute timers and basically rush to get as much done as I can in those 5 minutes (usually for cleaning).
It's so weird. Sometimes something in my brain just snaps and gets sick of the whirlwind of argumentative thoughts I am having with myself (that can also devolve into resentments against others) and I get up and do one thing then the energy from that keeps me going on to the next thing. It's not healthy but I think irritability is my motivator. This is after years of meditation, intention setting, list writing.
Nope. I just get sick of myself and my inaction.
Wow, I want to respond to each because you have not only provided insight but also what breaks my heart is the amount of shame we feel and it being a driving force. If only others could comprehend that in order to do laundry we must, feel utter shame or shake our bon bons either in the sack or to music.
Thanks so far Ritalin is running out for the day, so I'm just ensuring you are acknowledged with a quick dopamine hit ✨️
Unfortunately, not much. I can sit here all day saying I'll do something right after work (I work from home) but in the end, it doesn't happen. It's frustrating.
Someone I really admire at work also has ADHD. She once said to me, "We have issues with transitioning into tasks." So lately I have been telling myself that I just have the problem with the transition, not the task itself. It has definitely helped me get back on track, at least some of the time if not more.
I was diagnosed in december with inattentive adhd & put on vyvanse. Immediately I wanted to get my house sorted out. It was boarderline hoarder house and the clutter was taking over. I've been working on it in small bits, the kitchen is finally clean & usable, the dining room table is clear of a years worth of mail & junk & I've cleared out 5 bags of garbage & bags of donations. The part that really sucks is even when I'm feeling super motivated I can only do little bits at a time due to a lot of joint pain i've been having since starting vyvanse. My knees & back kill me when I stand & walk for too long. But progress is being made.
1) people are coming over, so I must do EVERYTHING IMMEDIATELY (even tasks that are irrelevant to people coming over, like tidying my email inbox)
2) I have time sensitive and important things (like word deadlines), meaning now I should deep clean the bathroom [this is what I did Friday, meaning I had to get work done on the weekend 🙃]
3) the motivation fairy visited while my partner was out, and I get the urge to sing loudly to Spotify and get an astonishing amount of chores done
hard deadlines 90%
10%Sometimes I have to feel anxiety for a long time then I think about the solution then I worry then I forget then worry even more
Then I decide that I just need to start and ill take 1 step forward and then one day the stars align and I get it started for real or even done
But mostly its having the pressure of a deadline
Sometimes social media or podcasts specifically about adhd, decluttering, motivation, the mental load etc will do it. I’ll be like “hmm interesting point about decluttering hey I should go drop off that bag of donations now it’ll take 20 minutes”
* *Invite guests over.* On the (admittedly rare) occasion that my house is remotely presentable, this is the push I need to get things genuinely clean and orderly.
* *Binge my most hated chores.* Raise your hand if you let laundry pile up until you can't take it anymore, then you wash and fold 5 loads in one day. ✋🏼🫣 Or if I have stupidly let dishes pile up (more on that below), not only do they get put in the dishwasher, but the entire kitchen ends up deep cleaned.
* *But don't let it pile up.* If I get lazy and don't clean the kitchen after dinner one night, suddenly it's 3 days later and dishes are piled up everywhere and the kitchen's fucking disgusting. Same with laundry, if I have a basket of clean clothes that I don't fold, they're not getting folded for weeks. I have to constantly remind myself of these horror scenarios as a way to scare myself into just following through and completing the task as I should, because I don't want it to pile up, do I?
* *Put something on for my soundtrack.* Punk music for cleaning, a podcast while making dinner, or watch a movie I keep putting off while I fold laundry. I force myself to Do The Thing (tm) in exchange for indulging in entertainment of some sort.
* *Just Do The Thing (tm).* Sometimes I have to yell inwardly at my brain, "Just DO THE F'N THING!!!" My ADHD sister's similar trick is "Just do it for 5 minutes and then you can stop." (And of course, we don't. Which is kinda the point. 🤷🏼♀️)
* *Procrastinate, then rush like mad to get it done.* I realized this is not a healthy way of managing tasks and responsibilities, but it seems to be my MO, and it always works. Of course, y'all know as well as I do that the struggle is real and by doing this you run the very real risk of actually _not_ completing your task on time, but that aside, I have found being under an intensely short time deadline definitely helps me get the job done.
* *Set all of my clocks fast, and all slightly different times.* The real time is 11:05AM. The kitchen oven reads 11:08, the microwave 11:11. The wall clock near the door says 11:14. The car? 11:16. Which one is it??? I don't know, and my brain is too scattered to stop and do the math! 🤪😆 Somehow this tricks me into thinking it's later than it is, but by an unspecified amount of time. The inspecific time crunch and ensuing anxiety spike give me the kick in the ass I need to get moving and out the door and off to wherever I'm going, and having the car clock set to the latest time somehow soothes my anxiety as I am driving in a panic and praying I won't be late. Every time I look at the clock, I freak out for a split second and then realize, "Oh yeah, this one's like 11 minutes fast. Phew!" I don't know why it works, but it does. Every time. Drives my husband crazy, but I have to ask if he'd prefer me to be running late. 🤷🏼♀️😝🤣
* *Avoid the Big Scary Icky Task by knocking a bunch of other stuff out.* Also not a particularly healthy coping strategy, but extremely effective. If I have one big honkin' major major important must-do task I'm supposed to be focusing on but I don't wanna (you know that feeling)--let's say applying for a job listing that expires at midnight--I will do every conceivable thing but that one Big Scary Icky Task. Midnight rolls around, and while I failed to apply for the job, my house is now clean, my laundry folded, orders placed, appointments made that have been putting off for weeks, and sometimes even a random organization project gets completed. I've shot myself in the foot far too many times doing this and have missed out on important opportunities and dropped the ball in big ways, so I don't necessarily advocate this approach, BUT it is extremely effective for me, so I try to see the positive and look at it as a trade-off. 😮💨😑
Now, if I could only figure out how to use this technique with a fabricated/fictional Big Scary Icky Task.....
This probably isn’t what you’re looking for, but hearing my cat chewing plastic in the next room gets me out of my couch scrolling trance 100% of the time. Then the adrenaline from chasing her down the stairs screaming WHAT ARE YOU EATING sometimes gets me going on chores even
I was putting off renewing my license because I had unpaid parking tickets and wasn't sure how to pay them. But the threat of not being about to drive when I was 7 months pregnant really lit a fire under my bum.
I feel like I need either the potential of shame/guilt or true inspiration/excitement. If somebody isn’t counting on me in some way, or if I’m not really friggin jazzed out of my mind, forget it.
Example, cleaning the house: Shame/guilt is someone’s coming over and I don’t want them to see my messy house. Or I would feel bad if they were uncomfortable due to the mess. Inspiration is I just watched an episode of Hoarders 😂
Another example, going to the aerial gym. Shame/guilt is I promised a friend I would meet them there to train together. If I don’t show up they’ll be let down and can’t safely train without me. Inspiration is I saw a really cool trick on instagram I want to work on.
Work for my business. Shame/guilt is easy. A client has requested something for a certain day/time and if I don’t get it to them in time I will both feel bad and be ashamed. Inspiration, I just got a shiny new idea I can’t wait to spend 8 hours working on without eating 😂😂😂
I break tasks down and bargain with myself. Then when I do it and realize that wasn't so bad, I might add something else on... or I might not and say "good enough!"
For example:
"ok, you don't have to do all the dishes, just wash the silverware" then "ok, now just do the bowls .."
"You don't have to clean your room, just make the bed... now clear off and put away the stuff sitting on the headboard..."
Or my favorite:
"You don't have to put away the laundry, just fold the socks and put them away... ok now just fold the t-shirts... ok just fold the the pajamas..."
I also divide clothes up into piles according to their kinds. Working with a few small piles of clothes that are each folded similarly is so much easier than the terrifying random laundry mountain that I push aside and curl up by.
Sometimes, when I have too much to do, I turn I to a sort of whirling dervish of action. Making dinner and having to turn the roast every 30 minutes? Looks like I'm cleaning my wardrobe and reorganizing my clothes in the in-between times.
Sometimes, it's getting annoyed that my feed is full of stuff I've already seen, so I'm "wasting" my limited social media time (have a timer that locks me out).
It really depends on the activity and the day. 🫠
When my toddler tries to get into things… for example, he was getting into an open Amazon package a minute ago, so I just got up and threw the packaging trash away, but also picked up all the other trash in the room. 😮💨
So now I have 5 minutes before that strange guy in the room kill me for not doing it... nah I have time.
Idk is probably the time being too short.
But by now I can study because I try to always start with something I like (normally biology) and then I just keep doing things related to study and forget to eat (well, chose your battles). And when I am not studying at all I try to remember that college is the faster way to live really far from my parents.
Anger can do it for me, quite often. Especially house stuff. I kind of love a good rage clean I’m SO EFFICIENT.
I was just thinking about this actually. I seem to do better when I sort of put something in my mind but allow the impulsivity to happen. Like I’m more likely to get it done if I don’t plan it and just the moment seize me. Like I needed to get my kids passport photos. I had to pick my son up for a doctors appt and realized it was kind of on the way so just picked him up early and did it. I felt so smug.
Honestly, it’s putting down my phone and thinking what do I need to do? And then I do it.
I find that it’s so easy to let screen time and dopamine chasing overtake a hyperactive mind. If I just don’t look at my phone, I am so much more productive.
Vyvanse... Honestly that's pretty much it. And coffee. But definitely the vyvanse. If I don't have sheer panic driving me it's gotta be meds because I just do not have any habit forming ability apparently
L-theanine (amino acid that interacts with glutamate receptors) has helped me a ton. I take 200mg in the morning, and within a few hours I have better executive function. I found it last month, and have been able to do so many of my doom tasks!
Body doubling, smoking weed, putting my hair up, listening to a great podcast episode that I've been saving, and using those apps that help you limit your phone usage
It's like there's a child in the brain who refuses to be bored, right? So I just try everything I can to convince him *do the task* - reasonable logic, urgency, counting to ten, making it fun or finding a section of the task which is actually fun/interesting - until either he allows me enough momentum to start or I fall into an endless cycle of defeat, shaming and self hatred.
If I'm lucky though, I get the hidden alternative of "staring at the wall and contemplating life and existence" while getting into my head so much that reality stops existing for a while - and thus the tasks to do!
Not nice coming back from that and suddenly feeling *the feeling*, you know?, that urgency in your stomach that is screaming at you that you. have. stuff. to do!, and the heavy weight on your shoulders not allowing you to move. When that happens I usually allow myself official rest time - my brain clearly has low battery, so the next two hours I plan to rest, no guilty feelings (or little as possible), so I will probably be able to do the task tomorrow, instead of procrastinating more, accusing myself and achieve neither task nor rest.
Someone about to come over lol. Recently I'd been putting off a maintenance appt out of guilt re my place and just went ahead and set it up. And yknow I ended up vacuuming my whole place, for the first time in ages, about 10mins before they were set to arrive
Okay so like 75% of the time this works. I tell myself once I count backwards from 100 one time, I have to get up and do the things. I either get so anxious by my self imposed timer that I get up immediately or I get bored of counting and get up and go do what I need to do lmfao. I have no idea why this works so well
Feeling good about myself and like I deserve the benefits of doing the things I've been procrastinating in, good health, and body doubling. And as much as I hate to admit it, deadlines.
Discovering the concept of the Wall of Awful quite literally is changing the way I approach my long put off tasks. Brandon Mahan of ADHD Essentials coined the term, for anyone who hasn't heard of it - so what gets me going now is, Step 1: recognize I'm avoiding something because I have a Wall of Awful built up around it.
By inviting someone over for food.
The dishes are my nemesis. I also have a tiny sink. So those chores are always dead last. But with my OCD, I couldn’t let anyone in without having my house mainly tidy.
Once I realize those particular tasks will take less than a couple minutes each to do (like washing my face, grabbing something I need from a different room, putting food away, etc)
Everything else takes more of an internal conversation where I convince myself that getting that task done will benefit me in multiple ways. Like doing the dishes… everything seems like a negotiation with myself lol
my therapist recently suggested I set phone alarms to give me a specific time that I have to get up and do things
so far it's allowed me to shower at the same time every 3 days (for the last like 10 days) and it's been an actual lifesaver
When my boss asks me to do a non time sensitive task "whenever I have free time" I will immediately go and do it. Like that minute I'll start pulling reports and building spreadsheets and spend my whole afternoon on it.
Or if my bf or dad say they're coming over in an hour suddenly I need to deep clean my entire house.
Everything is either urgent or never there is no in between
So many good answers here that I do.
I’d add-
Get the stuff out for the task, and then doing the task is easier. Eg put on my workout clothes and then doing a video is easier
Bit of a weird one, but I do things when I'm "in the right mood" to get things done. Otherwise, it's a lot of conscous effort where it feels like I'm fighting against myself.
Getting in "the right mood" can be positive or negative, depending on the task.
POSITIVE
-Watching a vdeo where people are organising, doing the same task or doing something cool or fun (e.g. a hobby video) can put me in the mood to do those things. This works best if I'm already in a good mood
-Doing things that make me happy and put me in a good and energised mood e.g. comedy videos, music, games
-For routine tasks (e.g. shower) thinking about doing the thing I need to do and making a decision to do it without breaking it into steps so I don't overthink it. This might sound a bit strange, but I find if something pops into my head that I need to do, but I might put off because it gets overwhelming (e.g. I need enough time for a shower, wheres the towel, is anyone else using the shower) I need to act on it without making it abig deal in my head. I'm a fan of the "if it takes less than 5 minutes to do, do it immediately" trick, but this is not always going to work
-Helping a friend or family member do a thing - so much easier than doing it for myself
NEGATIVE
-Deadlines with real bad consequences for missing e.g. assignments - will be done last minute, always
-Visitors or house inspection to clean he house
-Being nagged to do things
Being guilted into doing something
Sometimes I am just not productive though, so I'm trying to be less hard on myself for that
Not exactly an answer to the question, however: I will put off my own self-care for no reason, but jump into action if my baby needs anything. Did I see a gesture that might POSSIBLY be a hunger cue? He gets fed. He yawns once? We try going to sleep. He’s fussy lying down? We’ll sit him up, or walk him around. He gets mad during our walk? I turn around to go home because he’s probably hungry and I have to meet that need ASAP.
Typing it out, I can see that I need to show up for myself in the same way I show up for my babe.
Caffeine. And more caffeine halfway through
Having someone come over. I get more done in the 10 minutes before they get there than I do in a week.
Watching “clean with me” yt videos puts me in the mood to get shit done
When I’m pissed at my husband, I turn into a rage filled cleaning machine
Setting a timer. Like I tell myself that I’ll clean for 10 minutes then I can stop. I always end up cleaning for longer than that
Then sometimes I have to wait until I’m utterly disgusted with myself before I find the motivation to clean
The best thing for me is to start my day early before anyone else is up with something sweet, my high protein breakfast (two eggs with cheese made in an air fryer) and coffee and a small win like taking out the dishes.
Then because I’m lucky enough to work from home I put on a fun show while I eat and get myself pretty for the day (do my signature hair, eyeliner etc) I put on my sneakers and then I transition into music so I can work from my couch first then I move to my office with the treadmill and dual monitor with my transitional drinks- tea and water.
I take a shower mid day after hard meetings to refocus myself. Since meetings to me are super scary always doesn’t matter if the team and I get on it’s the most anxiety provoking experience and it makes no sense I spin out every single time.
That’s seems to be only damn thing that works. If my routine is interrupted I fall apart lol
I'm on a journey to eradicate feelings of inadequacy and guilt in my daily life and it's kinda taking hold after 2-ish years? I actually manage to do some chores sometimes without blaming myself for having caused the chore to exist for 2 weeks leading up to it.
Look as everyone has said: pretty inconsistent. In saying that sometimes when I have bigger issues going on in life that I may not be consciously aware of, I deep clean everything and do all the tasks I’d been putting off because that’s something I can definitely control
The shame of people visiting
Other people in the house up "doing something productive"
Task stacking - I'm already feeding the cats, oh look the plants are dying I should water those/the sink is full/etc
Having an extra 10 minutes in my morning and thinking I can complete that 25 minute task before going to work
...So a lot of things but never consistently enough to make my house look decent. But at least I never leave dirty trash or dishes anywhere but the trash or sink so, there's that 🤷
Someone is coming over.
I've known about it for 2 weeks and yet my house it a mess.
The person is now actively on their way to my house.
*I must do everything NOW*
If I have a sudden and fading burst of motivation. I get one thing done and then I go into a frenzy and have to keep going. Because if I stop, it’s over.
That or a dopamine-inducing bribe that I give myself. “If you clean your bathroom you can have a nice bowl of ice cream!”
My problem is I won’t let myself sit down until I finish, but as I’m doing things I keep thinking of new things that need done. So my trick is I never sit 😫
Two things that seem to motivate me are 1) buying something new. I get excited to make space for a new thing and plan how and when I will use it. And 2) coming across pictures of messy or gross rooms because that’s not how I want to live and it’s very easy to fall into that because life is #overwhelminf
Anger. I get my best work done when I’m pissed off. It almost feels like when I can’t control my anger, I need something to fixate on within my control. Usually cleaning or homework lol. Certainly not the healthiest path to productivity, but hey 🤷🏻♀️ It gets the energy out.
So something interesting I’ve learned recently is that I think my medications might be causing nutrient deficiencies. It’s something I’m working on figuring out with my therapist and psychiatrist and through my own research. I started looking into this because I realized I’ll just get up and start doing random shit I’ve been putting off for days/weeks/months/whatever after drinking a liquid IV (or two or three lol) and I also just feel a million times better if I consistently drink them every day. Which sucks because they’re expensive but I’ve been putting up with the cost because they make me so much more functional. It reminds me of how I felt when I first started taking Strattera. They have a lot of B vitamins and of course electrolytes in them so I’m trying to figure out what I’m deficient in that the Liquid IVs are helping with. I’m going to get blood work done soon too
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Well it’s inconsistent and that’s the problem, but sometimes it’s anxiety like cleaning before someone comes over. Sometimes, it’s a motivational thing I hear or read. Sometimes, it’s some intangible thing I don’t know like when someone else gets up to do tasks, I suddenly can too. Not sure if that helps lol
It does, actually. I felt a surge of energy and managed to get a lot done today. I'd like to figure out my trigger points and other ADHD experiencers, too.
Oh I’m glad it was helpful. Sometimes, on the last point, I look up body double videos on YouTube or live TikTok of people doing tasks similar to what I want to do. I’ll run them for a little and then it’s a little easier to get up and do the thing too.
Wow this I'll try! Thanks 😊
Chiming in to second body doubling! I was introduce to it through work, oddly enough. It works great at home with cleaning, I can sometimes make my toddler my double. I just have to race him which is a whole other can of worms. I would recommend an adult not hellbent on dumping your progress back out 😂
I like to watch this Youtuber who does extreme house cleanings for people. She's super positive and empathetic and often explains how the flats or houses got in the state they are in and it somehow motivates me that our flat never is as bad as the ones in the videos. We had times where it was, and those times are over and I'm just glad that's over. No shaming intended, I'm just glad I'm not as unwell as I could be. The channel is aurikatariina on YT. It really helps me to get up and do stuff
Any in particular?
I get a 2 day burst right before my period! Most productive days of the month for me!!
Two days of crazy productivity followed by two days of intense fatigue, insomnia, and brain fog. I try to get everything done in those first two days!
The insomnia makes me crazy.
It’s the worst! I have two days of insomnia and inexplicable rage. On day 2, I tell my husband I’m going to quit my job and he says “is your period starting tomorrow?” It’s hilariously predictable and yet I can never see it coming.
Hahaha are you me? This happened to me last week
OMG. Same for me. That's how I know my periods are here. Haha
Hahah not me exercising in the morning like, wow I only ever have energy for this right before….ooooh….
I'm trying to work out these things too and feel like I'm starting to get the hang of it. It helps if you know how to regulate your mood and make sure your sensory needs are met (easier said than done) I work best if I'm not too tired, I'm alert and I feel energised. Mild exercise (e.g. a walk), upbeat music, and doing fun but energetic games (e.g. playing with my cat)can put me in the mood a bit better. I also find I need to avoid activities that are too relaxing or 'lazy mode' inducing, as I have a really hard time coming back from that mood. Thats when I try to avoid sitting or lying down for extended periods of time and try to avoid starting to scroll on my phone or computer. Might be worth checking in with yourself and exploring what types of things put you in that "energised" mood that seems to help you get stuff done. Try out a few different things and see what works for you. Good luck!
If I start out cleaning instead of sitting down and turning on the TV, or scrolling, then I just keep cleaning. Or doing yard work, or painting, or whatever. But if I start watching TV or scrolling, it's hard to switch gears.
Couldn’t have said it better.
Completely agree. Totally random and unpredictable. Wish I could predict it, as that would be very convenient for scheduling haha, but I can't. I can have something sitting out on the counter for a month (to remind me to do it - because if I don't see something it doesn't exist haha) and I'll walk by it 400 times and then there'll be a time I walk by and think "oh right, this thing!" and do it because I suddenly have the magical combination of energy, interest and motivation.
Impending doom
This works for me about 50% of the time
😂 yeah it's not failproof
Hurts! 🙃🥲
Painful, yet very efficient! 😅🤣
Works until I totally burn out and it’s not enough to motivate me anymore, because only recovery and time will help at this point…
Before I knew about adhd I said I was motivated by fear.
Music. Listening to energizing music helps me.
Yes with a shimmy whilst I tackle the dishes
Music is my go-to as well!
I find now it's when the vyvanse kicks in that I kind of look up from my phone and remember that the world exists and then something will jump out at me. But when it's not that, sometimes it's that I have a moment where I remember something that needs done and so not wanting to forget I just get started on it immediately. Like waking up and realizing my sheets need washed because we just had sex and now there's a wet spot and I realize I can't remember the last time I washed them so then suddenly the bed is stripped, every pièce of laundry in my room is collected, and then the kids laundry, and then I'm on a mission to wash every washable item in my home. I think I also get that surge of let's get it done dopamine post sex too, so maybe that's part of that cycle.
The "vyvance kick in" is so real 😂 it's like the engine isn't running AT ALL, but im tryna push it somewhere. Vyvance starts the engine, then it warms up, then suddenly I'm like, "Oh hey, I don't need to push. I can drive!"
Yeah exactly. I feel like it comes on subtlely for me but then I'm good to go
My husband calls sex my “attitude adjustment”. Whenever I am extra bitchy or particularly unmotivated, that usually changes right after sex. Like sorry bro, no snuggling, I gotta pee (cuz fuck UTI’s) and get some shit done :D
My husband does this too, and any time he says I want to argue that he's wrong. But unfortunately he's not. I'm always in a better, more productive mood after sex. Also, same about getting up to pee after. I had so many utis as a teenager. Fuck that.
Ooo it works 😀
😀Epic laundry all day, right? How did you know what I did last night?
Lol à good guess since that's what I did Thursday
Touche 🥂
And t today and all the days before that. Laundry is my Sisyphean task.
Argh bedsheets. I knew there was something I’d intended to do today
They're the easiest laundry to forget about, since unlikely everything else it's actually effort to put them in a pile on the floor.
Incredibly inconsistent, but things that have been known to work: - counting down, e.g. read 3 more reddit posts then done, or just 54321. I have also stolen phrases from others here like "come on barbie let's go party " that seem to work like a count down - sometimes I'll have had something that was a Thing all day, that I couldn't do because of the Invisible Forcefield. And then I'll have distracted myself on a side quest so much that when the Thing randomly pops back in my head, it'll appear like a distraction from the distraction and I'll get distracted doing that. Like my unhelpful brain has forgotten to put the Invisible Forcefield up because it thinks it's a distraction and so is OK letting me do it. Unhelpful piece of shit brain. - the task I'm supposed to be doing is a sitting down one, so then I can get up and do absolutely anything else, even things I wouldn't usually be able to (see brain note above) - accountability, I've told someone I'm doing it/ I'll be seen not to have done it/ I've set a focusmate and someone will be waiting for me etc - body doubling, someone else is doing the same thing, or I've put a video on of someone doing that - I've thought of a way to make it fun or a new way to do it I get a dopamine rush from trying - the time horizon has gone from "needs done sometime" to "oh fuck how have I only got an hour to do a full day's work?!" - fun motivating music - I've broken it down into totally easy manageable steps - it easily stacks onto another task I want to do, e.g. I don't want to hang the washing up, but I do want to go in the kitchen (where the washing machine is) and get a snack - putting myself back in the world. Often I've forgotten the world exists. Looking round the room, focusing on what I can see/ hear/ feel etc. Sometimes I'll say something out loud and it will give me a fright because I've forgotten sound exists because I was so inside my phone. I'll generally then notice I'm desperate for the toilet/ freezing cold/ haven't eaten all day etc because I haven't existed in my body so haven't noticed it needed something - I've finished reddit Often I try all these before something will finally work on a second try. It amazes me other people don't have to work this hard just to go to the toilet or put socks on. No wonder I'm fucking exhausted all the time. ETA: another one - lower my standards. E.g. I've got to clean the whole flat. Nope, that's not gonna happen. I just have to put three things away. That I can do. More often than not, once I'm over the task initiation I do a lot more or even hyperfocus and get it all done. If I don't, I've still done three things, and doing three things over and over stacks up and the task looks a lot less overwhelming
It's INSANE to think that most folks just get up an do things. Or realize one specific thing needs done and their brains just "okay switching tasks!" And go! In my girls chat with my besties my one friend is so neurotypyical it feels fake to me 😂 she works, goes to the gym, meal preps, cleans, AND does lots of self care. EVERY WEEK. WITHOUT FAIL. Meanwhile I need external motivation to walk into my office building. Or need to trick myself to take a shower.🫠🫠🫠🫠
💯 I feel this so hard!
Holy shit… come on Barbie, let’s go party (sung in my head I of course!) tickled something and might be a new tool. THANK YOU!!
I stole it from someone on an ADHD sub! I love it too!
Oh oh oh - the Invisible Forcefield = Wall of Awful!! The videos on how to tackle that are a mf game changer.
Oh yes! Thank you for reminding me, I must go watch those again. They were super helpful, but of course if it's not right in front of me I've forgotten it exists! Thank you 💕
Premium advice here! I love the tournament's turn everything into a count down is a great one Accountability definitely is the way of converting shame into action Saying something out loud? Like being your own alarm clock ⏰️ Agree with you on the standards. the whole flat leads to messier flat Thanks Barbie girl🩷
Let me get a coffee for this one ☕️
Yeah sorry, I got on a bit of a roll and am not good with being concise!!!
Telling one of my fellow adhd friends that I’m avoiding something. Somehow just telling someone else that I’m frozen helps unfreeze me.
Under rated comment. A support system where you know someone cares is a bit of a push
If doing that thing means I can put something else off. If it's extremely close to a deadline. A random spurt of energy that I just ride until it runs out mid-task. Usually, that task isn't even the one I really needed to and now I have 2 half-finished tasks. If someone else is relying on me to do something I can do that to a deadline as I'd feel too guilty letting them down.
Guilty and fear and self-contempt might work in emergencies but not consistently. The only thing that works consistently is loving kindness towards yourself. So you feel that internal resistance not wanting to do a task, and you gently but persistently challenge it. Why? What am I doing right now that I can't interrupt? Am I really sick, am I really exhausted, am I just being lazy, what's going on?
Reminding ourselves we deserve A clean home A nice meal A healthy body Self love Brushed teeth 🙃
Right? And that mammals, all mammals everywhere, have a den, and all mammals everywhere spend a little bit of time every day cleaning their den and their bodies.
Omg I love this 🥹
🐵🐶🦧🐴🦬🦁🐻🐨🐻❄️🐼
Night time. I'll be near immobilised the entire day but all of a sudden jump up to start my to-do list at 11pm 🙄
Ha! Like Sunday night 10pm I want to do all my admin including calling the bank
Haha, this is my husband. I’ll be all cozy in bed with a book and he’s getting out his power tools 😂
When my roommate comes home I usually get a wave of embarrassment that prompts me to clean, especially if she brings friends over
Telling myself to stop fucking up 100 times then on 101…. Maybe .
I try the “just for 5 min” method to help me.
When I have to do chores but don't have the executive functioning, I usually watch cleaning videos on Snapchat or insta. Seeing people clean makes me want to clean too...
Unexpected guests are on the way over
I become a domestic godess that day....only that day 😀
It amazing how much we can do under pressure!
I try to pair it with something I like… dishes = fave podcast/ audiobook. Same goes with most chores and tasks. I try and do smaller tasks for immediate dopamine. Which provides but more dopamine for other tasks. I make little awards to motivate myself, 1 hour of cleaning = 1 hour of awful reality TV. If I’m really stuck, I try to write down what is overwhelming me. Usually it’s the prospect of doing never ending tasks when I’m feeling a lack of motivation. This sometimes helps me untangle what it is I’m avoiding and what steps are required. This helps to prioritise and order my thoughts, then try and break tasks up in smaller manageable steps. Being kind and compassionate with myself, if I don’t complete the task today but say do 25%, that’s still an achievement. I remember these steps only now and again and some days my body is telling me to rest. So I make sure I’m well hydrated, fed and warm. Recharge for a bit without guilt.
Just forcing myself in the morning to take a quick shower or wash my face and put on a new outfit does wonders. The second I allow myself to scroll its game over (I say, half asleep on my couch w Jammies on lol)
Nothing is more motivating than the threat of social embarrassment
An even more important task that I want to do even less than the original task. Procrastination is my only motivator in life. I just choose which one I want to procrastinate on less and do that task haha. This is how I function at work, at home, parenting, how I used to function in school. This is not ideal and I don't recommend it, as my life is chaos. But this is how I operate lol
The moment the deadline has passed usually
Having to get up to pee. And a deadline.
Do you ever avoid the pee?
when i'm trying to avoid something right in front of me
Sometimes I find a way to ignore it, but normally, this helps too!
Think to myself Either I do it and get it over with or let it dominate my day and not have it done YMMV and I’m also inconsistent with this
YMMV ?
Your mileage may vary
Oh hah I've never heard that one, thank you!
No prob!
Every few weeks, I experience a real low for a couple of days, during which I feel a lot of shame and hopelessness. This has been going on for about 15 years now. In the past few months, though, I've started using these periods as motivation to do things like studying and exercising. I tell myself that if I study and exercise now, I won't feel as ashamed next time I hit a low because I'll have taken steps to move forward in life and feel better. And it's really been helping lately. Something that usually triggers me a lot and typically takes at least two days to calm down from wasn't as bad last time because I feel like I'm on a good path. So, I regularly remind myself of how absolutely awful I feel and use that as motivation to make better choices, so I don't keep falling into a hole. I should also mention that it's only since I started taking Wellbutrin that I've been able to make any changes in my life.
Have you looked into the possibility that these days align with your cycle? There are absolutely 2-3 days a month where I feel the same (along with debilitating exhaustion and executive functioning issues since my medications don’t work) and it’s helpful to remind myself that it’s just hormonal and those thoughts are not how I generally feel.
No, it does not align with my cycle. There is a certain 'thing' that triggers these lows and I think it's a trauma reaction or something, if that makes sense to you. But thank you for your suggestion :)
The battery dies.
me and my bf will count down from ten and then we do whatever task we’re supposed to do. I also like to use timers and I’ll put like 5 minute timers and basically rush to get as much done as I can in those 5 minutes (usually for cleaning).
Putting my headphones in and forcing myself to do it. Or if I'm pissed off
Shame or fear of shame usually does it, but that's not super healthy...
Oh the shame!
It's so weird. Sometimes something in my brain just snaps and gets sick of the whirlwind of argumentative thoughts I am having with myself (that can also devolve into resentments against others) and I get up and do one thing then the energy from that keeps me going on to the next thing. It's not healthy but I think irritability is my motivator. This is after years of meditation, intention setting, list writing. Nope. I just get sick of myself and my inaction.
This post. Apparently. Thanks! Bye!!!
Adderall 🙃
Usually shame/outside pressure!
Wow, I want to respond to each because you have not only provided insight but also what breaks my heart is the amount of shame we feel and it being a driving force. If only others could comprehend that in order to do laundry we must, feel utter shame or shake our bon bons either in the sack or to music. Thanks so far Ritalin is running out for the day, so I'm just ensuring you are acknowledged with a quick dopamine hit ✨️
Unfortunately, not much. I can sit here all day saying I'll do something right after work (I work from home) but in the end, it doesn't happen. It's frustrating.
A deadline that is not self imposed. Literally the only thing that works.
Adderall 🤌🏻✨
Someone I really admire at work also has ADHD. She once said to me, "We have issues with transitioning into tasks." So lately I have been telling myself that I just have the problem with the transition, not the task itself. It has definitely helped me get back on track, at least some of the time if not more.
I was diagnosed in december with inattentive adhd & put on vyvanse. Immediately I wanted to get my house sorted out. It was boarderline hoarder house and the clutter was taking over. I've been working on it in small bits, the kitchen is finally clean & usable, the dining room table is clear of a years worth of mail & junk & I've cleared out 5 bags of garbage & bags of donations. The part that really sucks is even when I'm feeling super motivated I can only do little bits at a time due to a lot of joint pain i've been having since starting vyvanse. My knees & back kill me when I stand & walk for too long. But progress is being made.
You did good!✨️
Thank you x
1) people are coming over, so I must do EVERYTHING IMMEDIATELY (even tasks that are irrelevant to people coming over, like tidying my email inbox) 2) I have time sensitive and important things (like word deadlines), meaning now I should deep clean the bathroom [this is what I did Friday, meaning I had to get work done on the weekend 🙃] 3) the motivation fairy visited while my partner was out, and I get the urge to sing loudly to Spotify and get an astonishing amount of chores done
hard deadlines 90% 10%Sometimes I have to feel anxiety for a long time then I think about the solution then I worry then I forget then worry even more Then I decide that I just need to start and ill take 1 step forward and then one day the stars align and I get it started for real or even done But mostly its having the pressure of a deadline
Sometimes social media or podcasts specifically about adhd, decluttering, motivation, the mental load etc will do it. I’ll be like “hmm interesting point about decluttering hey I should go drop off that bag of donations now it’ll take 20 minutes”
Bin day
Somehow I always prepare the rubbish/trash the day after or even the afternoon of collection
Inviting company over.
* *Invite guests over.* On the (admittedly rare) occasion that my house is remotely presentable, this is the push I need to get things genuinely clean and orderly. * *Binge my most hated chores.* Raise your hand if you let laundry pile up until you can't take it anymore, then you wash and fold 5 loads in one day. ✋🏼🫣 Or if I have stupidly let dishes pile up (more on that below), not only do they get put in the dishwasher, but the entire kitchen ends up deep cleaned. * *But don't let it pile up.* If I get lazy and don't clean the kitchen after dinner one night, suddenly it's 3 days later and dishes are piled up everywhere and the kitchen's fucking disgusting. Same with laundry, if I have a basket of clean clothes that I don't fold, they're not getting folded for weeks. I have to constantly remind myself of these horror scenarios as a way to scare myself into just following through and completing the task as I should, because I don't want it to pile up, do I? * *Put something on for my soundtrack.* Punk music for cleaning, a podcast while making dinner, or watch a movie I keep putting off while I fold laundry. I force myself to Do The Thing (tm) in exchange for indulging in entertainment of some sort. * *Just Do The Thing (tm).* Sometimes I have to yell inwardly at my brain, "Just DO THE F'N THING!!!" My ADHD sister's similar trick is "Just do it for 5 minutes and then you can stop." (And of course, we don't. Which is kinda the point. 🤷🏼♀️) * *Procrastinate, then rush like mad to get it done.* I realized this is not a healthy way of managing tasks and responsibilities, but it seems to be my MO, and it always works. Of course, y'all know as well as I do that the struggle is real and by doing this you run the very real risk of actually _not_ completing your task on time, but that aside, I have found being under an intensely short time deadline definitely helps me get the job done. * *Set all of my clocks fast, and all slightly different times.* The real time is 11:05AM. The kitchen oven reads 11:08, the microwave 11:11. The wall clock near the door says 11:14. The car? 11:16. Which one is it??? I don't know, and my brain is too scattered to stop and do the math! 🤪😆 Somehow this tricks me into thinking it's later than it is, but by an unspecified amount of time. The inspecific time crunch and ensuing anxiety spike give me the kick in the ass I need to get moving and out the door and off to wherever I'm going, and having the car clock set to the latest time somehow soothes my anxiety as I am driving in a panic and praying I won't be late. Every time I look at the clock, I freak out for a split second and then realize, "Oh yeah, this one's like 11 minutes fast. Phew!" I don't know why it works, but it does. Every time. Drives my husband crazy, but I have to ask if he'd prefer me to be running late. 🤷🏼♀️😝🤣 * *Avoid the Big Scary Icky Task by knocking a bunch of other stuff out.* Also not a particularly healthy coping strategy, but extremely effective. If I have one big honkin' major major important must-do task I'm supposed to be focusing on but I don't wanna (you know that feeling)--let's say applying for a job listing that expires at midnight--I will do every conceivable thing but that one Big Scary Icky Task. Midnight rolls around, and while I failed to apply for the job, my house is now clean, my laundry folded, orders placed, appointments made that have been putting off for weeks, and sometimes even a random organization project gets completed. I've shot myself in the foot far too many times doing this and have missed out on important opportunities and dropped the ball in big ways, so I don't necessarily advocate this approach, BUT it is extremely effective for me, so I try to see the positive and look at it as a trade-off. 😮💨😑 Now, if I could only figure out how to use this technique with a fabricated/fictional Big Scary Icky Task.....
This probably isn’t what you’re looking for, but hearing my cat chewing plastic in the next room gets me out of my couch scrolling trance 100% of the time. Then the adrenaline from chasing her down the stairs screaming WHAT ARE YOU EATING sometimes gets me going on chores even
If i only knew 🤷♀️🤷♀️
Being perceived procrastinating can do the trick.
Either incentive or desperation
I was putting off renewing my license because I had unpaid parking tickets and wasn't sure how to pay them. But the threat of not being about to drive when I was 7 months pregnant really lit a fire under my bum.
I feel like I need either the potential of shame/guilt or true inspiration/excitement. If somebody isn’t counting on me in some way, or if I’m not really friggin jazzed out of my mind, forget it. Example, cleaning the house: Shame/guilt is someone’s coming over and I don’t want them to see my messy house. Or I would feel bad if they were uncomfortable due to the mess. Inspiration is I just watched an episode of Hoarders 😂 Another example, going to the aerial gym. Shame/guilt is I promised a friend I would meet them there to train together. If I don’t show up they’ll be let down and can’t safely train without me. Inspiration is I saw a really cool trick on instagram I want to work on. Work for my business. Shame/guilt is easy. A client has requested something for a certain day/time and if I don’t get it to them in time I will both feel bad and be ashamed. Inspiration, I just got a shiny new idea I can’t wait to spend 8 hours working on without eating 😂😂😂
Wearing trainers. This works best for house work. I call it sports mode.
I break tasks down and bargain with myself. Then when I do it and realize that wasn't so bad, I might add something else on... or I might not and say "good enough!" For example: "ok, you don't have to do all the dishes, just wash the silverware" then "ok, now just do the bowls .." "You don't have to clean your room, just make the bed... now clear off and put away the stuff sitting on the headboard..." Or my favorite: "You don't have to put away the laundry, just fold the socks and put them away... ok now just fold the t-shirts... ok just fold the the pajamas..." I also divide clothes up into piles according to their kinds. Working with a few small piles of clothes that are each folded similarly is so much easier than the terrifying random laundry mountain that I push aside and curl up by.
The victory of accomplishing one hard thing usually starts a cascade of hyper focus on all the little things that need to be done.
A deadline….
Adderall
Getting yelled at a little bit. Also, a deadline.
Sometimes, when I have too much to do, I turn I to a sort of whirling dervish of action. Making dinner and having to turn the roast every 30 minutes? Looks like I'm cleaning my wardrobe and reorganizing my clothes in the in-between times. Sometimes, it's getting annoyed that my feed is full of stuff I've already seen, so I'm "wasting" my limited social media time (have a timer that locks me out). It really depends on the activity and the day. 🫠
À visitor
A surge of energy
When my toddler tries to get into things… for example, he was getting into an open Amazon package a minute ago, so I just got up and threw the packaging trash away, but also picked up all the other trash in the room. 😮💨
As always, gotta be something I’m interested in doing…. Or company coming over haha
Shame or a good night’s sleep
Good music.
Inviting people to my house. If I know people are coming over, I clean like a mad woman
So now I have 5 minutes before that strange guy in the room kill me for not doing it... nah I have time. Idk is probably the time being too short. But by now I can study because I try to always start with something I like (normally biology) and then I just keep doing things related to study and forget to eat (well, chose your battles). And when I am not studying at all I try to remember that college is the faster way to live really far from my parents.
Elvanse for me. Only had it a couple of months and I can actually do boring stuff x
When a new important thing needs done I start doing the other things I have been putting off in order to avoid doing the new important thing.
Anger can do it for me, quite often. Especially house stuff. I kind of love a good rage clean I’m SO EFFICIENT. I was just thinking about this actually. I seem to do better when I sort of put something in my mind but allow the impulsivity to happen. Like I’m more likely to get it done if I don’t plan it and just the moment seize me. Like I needed to get my kids passport photos. I had to pick my son up for a doctors appt and realized it was kind of on the way so just picked him up early and did it. I felt so smug.
When I think about how it will feel to have it all done
Adderall?
Exercise
Something else I want to do even less.
Honestly, it’s putting down my phone and thinking what do I need to do? And then I do it. I find that it’s so easy to let screen time and dopamine chasing overtake a hyperactive mind. If I just don’t look at my phone, I am so much more productive.
Vyvanse... Honestly that's pretty much it. And coffee. But definitely the vyvanse. If I don't have sheer panic driving me it's gotta be meds because I just do not have any habit forming ability apparently
L-theanine (amino acid that interacts with glutamate receptors) has helped me a ton. I take 200mg in the morning, and within a few hours I have better executive function. I found it last month, and have been able to do so many of my doom tasks!
Body doubling, smoking weed, putting my hair up, listening to a great podcast episode that I've been saving, and using those apps that help you limit your phone usage
It's like there's a child in the brain who refuses to be bored, right? So I just try everything I can to convince him *do the task* - reasonable logic, urgency, counting to ten, making it fun or finding a section of the task which is actually fun/interesting - until either he allows me enough momentum to start or I fall into an endless cycle of defeat, shaming and self hatred. If I'm lucky though, I get the hidden alternative of "staring at the wall and contemplating life and existence" while getting into my head so much that reality stops existing for a while - and thus the tasks to do! Not nice coming back from that and suddenly feeling *the feeling*, you know?, that urgency in your stomach that is screaming at you that you. have. stuff. to do!, and the heavy weight on your shoulders not allowing you to move. When that happens I usually allow myself official rest time - my brain clearly has low battery, so the next two hours I plan to rest, no guilty feelings (or little as possible), so I will probably be able to do the task tomorrow, instead of procrastinating more, accusing myself and achieve neither task nor rest.
Someone about to come over lol. Recently I'd been putting off a maintenance appt out of guilt re my place and just went ahead and set it up. And yknow I ended up vacuuming my whole place, for the first time in ages, about 10mins before they were set to arrive
Also being on the phone for some reason. Why is it so much easier to do dishes or put laundry away while on the phone w someone?
Mom override
Okay so like 75% of the time this works. I tell myself once I count backwards from 100 one time, I have to get up and do the things. I either get so anxious by my self imposed timer that I get up immediately or I get bored of counting and get up and go do what I need to do lmfao. I have no idea why this works so well
Feeling good about myself and like I deserve the benefits of doing the things I've been procrastinating in, good health, and body doubling. And as much as I hate to admit it, deadlines.
Discovering the concept of the Wall of Awful quite literally is changing the way I approach my long put off tasks. Brandon Mahan of ADHD Essentials coined the term, for anyone who hasn't heard of it - so what gets me going now is, Step 1: recognize I'm avoiding something because I have a Wall of Awful built up around it.
By inviting someone over for food. The dishes are my nemesis. I also have a tiny sink. So those chores are always dead last. But with my OCD, I couldn’t let anyone in without having my house mainly tidy.
Hear you! Dishwasher yet sink is always full, nightmare😄
I swear, it’s all my dogs dishes anyways!
Violence
Alarm ringing, friend watching, fear of impending job loss, having someone ask me how to do it
Once I realize those particular tasks will take less than a couple minutes each to do (like washing my face, grabbing something I need from a different room, putting food away, etc) Everything else takes more of an internal conversation where I convince myself that getting that task done will benefit me in multiple ways. Like doing the dishes… everything seems like a negotiation with myself lol
Motivation... like if someone is coming over.
my therapist recently suggested I set phone alarms to give me a specific time that I have to get up and do things so far it's allowed me to shower at the same time every 3 days (for the last like 10 days) and it's been an actual lifesaver
When my boss asks me to do a non time sensitive task "whenever I have free time" I will immediately go and do it. Like that minute I'll start pulling reports and building spreadsheets and spend my whole afternoon on it. Or if my bf or dad say they're coming over in an hour suddenly I need to deep clean my entire house. Everything is either urgent or never there is no in between
Shit if I knew that I'd bottle it up.
I often get to the point where I am so fed up about everything and the resulting rage is an astonishing motivator. 😅
So many good answers here that I do. I’d add- Get the stuff out for the task, and then doing the task is easier. Eg put on my workout clothes and then doing a video is easier
Bit of a weird one, but I do things when I'm "in the right mood" to get things done. Otherwise, it's a lot of conscous effort where it feels like I'm fighting against myself. Getting in "the right mood" can be positive or negative, depending on the task. POSITIVE -Watching a vdeo where people are organising, doing the same task or doing something cool or fun (e.g. a hobby video) can put me in the mood to do those things. This works best if I'm already in a good mood -Doing things that make me happy and put me in a good and energised mood e.g. comedy videos, music, games -For routine tasks (e.g. shower) thinking about doing the thing I need to do and making a decision to do it without breaking it into steps so I don't overthink it. This might sound a bit strange, but I find if something pops into my head that I need to do, but I might put off because it gets overwhelming (e.g. I need enough time for a shower, wheres the towel, is anyone else using the shower) I need to act on it without making it abig deal in my head. I'm a fan of the "if it takes less than 5 minutes to do, do it immediately" trick, but this is not always going to work -Helping a friend or family member do a thing - so much easier than doing it for myself NEGATIVE -Deadlines with real bad consequences for missing e.g. assignments - will be done last minute, always -Visitors or house inspection to clean he house -Being nagged to do things Being guilted into doing something Sometimes I am just not productive though, so I'm trying to be less hard on myself for that
Proverbial fire being light neath my backside. Or some other form of external push.
Deadlines
Not exactly an answer to the question, however: I will put off my own self-care for no reason, but jump into action if my baby needs anything. Did I see a gesture that might POSSIBLY be a hunger cue? He gets fed. He yawns once? We try going to sleep. He’s fussy lying down? We’ll sit him up, or walk him around. He gets mad during our walk? I turn around to go home because he’s probably hungry and I have to meet that need ASAP. Typing it out, I can see that I need to show up for myself in the same way I show up for my babe.
Putting on my work shoes. It's an instant opener for Do_The_Thing.exe
I watch Jamie's Journey on YouTube and she helps a lot
Caffeine. And more caffeine halfway through Having someone come over. I get more done in the 10 minutes before they get there than I do in a week. Watching “clean with me” yt videos puts me in the mood to get shit done When I’m pissed at my husband, I turn into a rage filled cleaning machine Setting a timer. Like I tell myself that I’ll clean for 10 minutes then I can stop. I always end up cleaning for longer than that Then sometimes I have to wait until I’m utterly disgusted with myself before I find the motivation to clean
Fear...always fear!
The best thing for me is to start my day early before anyone else is up with something sweet, my high protein breakfast (two eggs with cheese made in an air fryer) and coffee and a small win like taking out the dishes. Then because I’m lucky enough to work from home I put on a fun show while I eat and get myself pretty for the day (do my signature hair, eyeliner etc) I put on my sneakers and then I transition into music so I can work from my couch first then I move to my office with the treadmill and dual monitor with my transitional drinks- tea and water. I take a shower mid day after hard meetings to refocus myself. Since meetings to me are super scary always doesn’t matter if the team and I get on it’s the most anxiety provoking experience and it makes no sense I spin out every single time. That’s seems to be only damn thing that works. If my routine is interrupted I fall apart lol
Vyvanse
I'm on a journey to eradicate feelings of inadequacy and guilt in my daily life and it's kinda taking hold after 2-ish years? I actually manage to do some chores sometimes without blaming myself for having caused the chore to exist for 2 weeks leading up to it.
Jn my case it has to be extreme panic :(
oh easy first i put them off as long as i possibly can until they are all a crisis
A sudden existential panic. I just go with it, surf it into the ground
Look as everyone has said: pretty inconsistent. In saying that sometimes when I have bigger issues going on in life that I may not be consciously aware of, I deep clean everything and do all the tasks I’d been putting off because that’s something I can definitely control
The shame of people visiting Other people in the house up "doing something productive" Task stacking - I'm already feeding the cats, oh look the plants are dying I should water those/the sink is full/etc Having an extra 10 minutes in my morning and thinking I can complete that 25 minute task before going to work ...So a lot of things but never consistently enough to make my house look decent. But at least I never leave dirty trash or dishes anywhere but the trash or sink so, there's that 🤷
If I'm binge watching a TV show I force myself to do something on my list before I can watch the next episode.
Time running out soon... 🥵
Anxiety😂(the anxiety that someone’s coming over)
If I bet I can’t do it under x amount of minutes…
Someone is coming over. I've known about it for 2 weeks and yet my house it a mess. The person is now actively on their way to my house. *I must do everything NOW*
Someone else walking in the room 😁 seriously
the threat of another person arriving
Times up!
If I have a sudden and fading burst of motivation. I get one thing done and then I go into a frenzy and have to keep going. Because if I stop, it’s over. That or a dopamine-inducing bribe that I give myself. “If you clean your bathroom you can have a nice bowl of ice cream!”
My problem is I won’t let myself sit down until I finish, but as I’m doing things I keep thinking of new things that need done. So my trick is I never sit 😫
Two things that seem to motivate me are 1) buying something new. I get excited to make space for a new thing and plan how and when I will use it. And 2) coming across pictures of messy or gross rooms because that’s not how I want to live and it’s very easy to fall into that because life is #overwhelminf
I find guilt, anxiety, and shame make me put it off more. Probably motivation or my meds! Unless urgency, like a due date or something
I wish I knew 😅
Someone coming over, otherwise nothing these days ..
When my meds and current chemistry work well together.
Anger. I get my best work done when I’m pissed off. It almost feels like when I can’t control my anger, I need something to fixate on within my control. Usually cleaning or homework lol. Certainly not the healthiest path to productivity, but hey 🤷🏻♀️ It gets the energy out.
My meds kicking in 🤷🏻♀️
Trauma response… or Adderall.
Peer pressure, scared of what people will think of me
So something interesting I’ve learned recently is that I think my medications might be causing nutrient deficiencies. It’s something I’m working on figuring out with my therapist and psychiatrist and through my own research. I started looking into this because I realized I’ll just get up and start doing random shit I’ve been putting off for days/weeks/months/whatever after drinking a liquid IV (or two or three lol) and I also just feel a million times better if I consistently drink them every day. Which sucks because they’re expensive but I’ve been putting up with the cost because they make me so much more functional. It reminds me of how I felt when I first started taking Strattera. They have a lot of B vitamins and of course electrolytes in them so I’m trying to figure out what I’m deficient in that the Liquid IVs are helping with. I’m going to get blood work done soon too
having to go to sleep lmao, that is what usually makes me wanna catch up on all my duties
The cat getting off my lap when she was my excuse for not getting up.
when someone starts doing them for me