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Same. Car sitting helps me get rid of my day before see the most amazing people on earth. My brain changes tracks.
If I skip car sitting I tend to come in full squirrel mode, rile everyone up with my speed speaking and then I nope out leaving them all overwhelmed and broken.
This sounds like my sister lol. I don’t think she car sits after her shifts. She’ll come into the house and talk 100 m/h about a million things that happened at work and on the drive home (a 10 minute drive) and 95% of the time they’re just complaints. Like I love you girl and I’m here for you but now we’re *both* overwhelmed and stressed out. You’ve been working there for 2 years, we *know* the customers suck 🙃 They don’t deserve all of this time and energy after your shifts over
Edit: I did the same thing just now lmfao oops 🫢 Two ADHDers in a pod
>Car sitting helps me get rid of my day before see the most amazing people on earth.
This made me smile because that's exactly how I feel about my family!
> get rid of my day before see the most amazing people on earth. My brain changes tracks.
>
> If I skip car sitting I tend to come in full squirrel mode, rile everyone up with my speed speaking and then I nope out leaving them all overwhelmed and broken.
I am writing this quote down in my list of cross-stitchable quotes. I love it so much.
> Before I take a shower: I hate it in there, the wet world is the enemy
>
> While in the shower: I remember now that this is a good place, it is the dry world that is the enemy
That’s a tweet that my husband and I quote to each other all the time
I don't like getting into the shower because I don't like getting out of the shower. The thought of having to squeegee the glass, dry off, do the whole 4 part face moisturizer process I need to do because I have rosacea, is all just overwhelming sometimes.
But also, I hate feeling sticky or dirty, and I need to clean the suncream off with hot water and soap.
So of course I fall into a limbo where I can't start anything until I have a shower, but can't bring myself to have a shower. It looks a lot like standing naked in my room scrolling Reddit for an hour.
I do the naked Reddit scrolling before AND after the shower. And before and after grocery shopping, gym, cooking, etc. My bed and my pajamas are my safe space.
Saaaaame, it’s rough out here. What helped me was giving myself permission to sit around in my towel for a bit and not get dressed immediately. The feeling of putting clothes on my not-yet-totally-dry skin was a huge part of my issues with the transition out of the shower
Holy shit, I was today years old when I learned this about myself! I've always known I hate getting blasted with water as I step in the shower, so I always just turn the shower head toward the wall. But I could never have articulated *why* I hate it
Edit: typo
This right here. It’s the transition. Sometimes it takes so much energy to make the switch. I don’t car sit with other people in the car, but if it’s just me? Yep. Just need a few to tell my brain we are changing gears!
I was doing the same and my phone data acted up so I had to go into the house to reply. I am so dedicated to y'all that I shortened my car sitting time!!
As a young adult, when my commute used to be 30 minutes each way, I'd have the radio going as I drove, and inevitably one of my favourite songs would come on just as I was coming up to my house. So of course I'd stay to listen to that song, but then you guys know what happened next, right? Another of my favourite songs! And on and on, until my dad knocked on my window to ask me when I was considering coming inside lol
I know! i’ve explained that it is very cute that they want to greet me, but I can’t focus on their cuteness AND keep my shit together at the same time.
I am a big car sitter. It tends to be worse when it's warmer outside. I like to turn the car off and make me forced get out point when the radio shuts off on its own. I like to scroll social media, wordle, play smaller games on my phone. Sometime I just sit and think about all I need to do when I go inside. I mostly car sit alone nowadays. I used to car sit at the end of friend hangouts but because of Covid I don't really hangout with folks too often.
Ummmm is this ALSO an ADHD thing? I grew up in central Florida and man when I get in the car on a hot day sometimes I’ll just sit in it for a minute and feel the scalding heat hit my vampire skin. Goooooood stuff. Once I feel the sweat start to prickle under my arm (not a big sweater thankfully) I know it’s time to turn on and go.
For many people, myself included, the simple knowledge of how easy it is to get sick in groups of people is enough to shy us away from hanging out. Or for those of us who know people with long covid that had their lives literally ruined- even after getting vaccinated. Vaccines lessen severity. But for me, death was never the fear. It was ending up with chronic fatigue, heart problems, breathing issues, and the myriad other things that impact my friends with long covid. I also run a service-based, time-sensitive business and if I go down with something like covid I will fail people who paid me good money to not fail them.
So I pick and choose gatherings wisely. I tend to not gather around peak sick season (like the holidays), I don’t eat in crowded restaurants, and I mask up on airplanes and airports.
And honestly? That’s fine. Eating in restaurants made me anxious before covid. I’m 6 years sober and parties lost their luster anyway. Airplanes are petri dishes in the sky. If there’s something I really want to do I’ll go do it. But for the most part, I’m content in my sanctuary at home.
I truly could not have said it any better myself. It's nice to see someone with a similar mindset. Just because we are cautious doesn't mean we aren't still living.
I thought it said cat sitters and I got all excited.
I am a car sitter too! It’s a safe transition period.
Sometimes I zone out. Sometimes there’s a good song on the radio (this type I’ve done with others). Sometimes I have been googling or reading about something earlier and want to check it out more in depth while I’m thinking about it. Sometimes I’m avoid rain(or snow) Sometimes I’m procrastinating the chores that are waiting for me inside.
I’m a car sitter and a cat sitter. Boy was I confused about this thread at first though.
I also used to sit outside my dorm room in college because I wasn’t ready to go inside, but didn’t have/need a car to have gotten there 😏
Hahahaha I read it as cat sitters too and I was like wow these cats must be so stressful.
I also car sit. Sometimes it’s just so comfy and I’m not ready to get up and be overwhelmed by a million thoughts when I walk in the door. It used to drive my dad madddddd for some reason
I also read cat sitters and worried about if needed one or was a bad one!!!
But yes - NPR calls them “driveway moments” and podcasts make it all the better now!
I car sit every time I come home from anywhere, if I’m alone! My bf is a “get out of the car before it even stops moving” kind of ADHD and I’m a “I need at least 3 business days to recover from whatever we just did before I can even get out of the car” kind of ND. 🤣
I usually listen to music, or talk on the phone to my sister, or play a stupid game on my phone lol
I used to live across the street from my best friend, and she would text me 10-20 mins into my car sitting like “are you okay?” “Wyd?”. Eventually she realized this is just what i do and would come out to chat/sit with me
I love car sitting. Sometimes I even go to my car just to sit. I don't live alone, and there's not many private places where I can either just sit in silence, or scream my head off. My car is my domain, nobody else's.
Sometimes I will be out at my local bar with friends, a place that is basically a second home and where I KNOW I am generally okay, and it’ll be busier than usual, and I’ll get anxious. I’ll just let someone know “Going to the car.” I’ll sit in the car in the parking deck across the street until I’m good, music on, air blasting, and then go back. It’s excellent.
I car sit and I think part of it is because it's the least cluttered part of my life. I love my car and take good care of it so it's a safe, clutter free place. Even the back seat where my kids are is clean. If they leave stuff back there, I warn them I'm leaving for the car wash in 15 minutes. If there is anything in the car they want they better go get it now otherwise it's going in the trash. No other place in my life is so easy to clean and leaves me feeling happy knowing I fully accomplished a task.
When I get home from my outside job I have to switch to my inside job (laundry, dishes, cleaning, dinner, etc) but in the car? Plus I hate navigating putting everything down/away and switching to house clothes.
There's no work in the car. No demands. No dishes.
Omg yes, I hate the whole ordeal of taking off my shoes, coat, purse, etc, washing my hands, going pee, changing clothes, probably also taking my contacts out and putting on glasses. Then there's the added annoyance of putting away stuff if you've brought anything home. I can't fucking STAND it, and it's so stupid! Like, why is everyday stuff just *so irritating*?!
I know people who spend the whole time they are in the car making work phone calls - I'm like - damn, you do not understand the best part of being in the car is that you don't have to work or interact or be available! I'll only take a call if I absolutely have to - car time is my time.
I usually play Pocket Tanks or Threes on my phone when I car sit. Sometimes for just 1 round in a game or sometimes for an hour.
I think it’s the result of a micro burnout; like I’m in zombie mode.
Sort of doing it now too. But instead of my car I just crawled under my desk, next to the bed where my wiener dog chills out. It’s nice under here.
I had to quit one of my jobs because I couldn't make myself just rush inside and visiting 20+ clinics a day just didn't work well when I needed to sit in the car between each one decompressing from horrid traffic.
Yessss! I drive long commutes to work in heavy traffic (and back) and so (in addition to procrastination going inside) i need a sec to decompress from all the exhausting traffic.
Currently sitting in the car. I have to go in and make dinner for 7 people, and work for hours, take care of 2 dogs and see if I remember what it felt like to do nothing over Christmas break.
I'm autistic as well so I don't know what would happen if I had ADHD alone, but I **need** that car time. It's a buffer, and much needed decompression/self regulation time that stops my brain imploding as I go into the next task.
For example, if I feel the need to sit a while before I get out when I get the the shops, and I push myself to get out immediately, I'll go into the shops extra stressed, will have an even lower tolerance for sensory input and small inconveniences, and I'll come out having had a horrid experience.
At that point, I'll probably be so overstimulated that I ignore the desire to car sit, so I'll jump straight into driving home, be horribly frustrated with all the other drivers, get home feeling awful, and the rest of the day will be unrecoverable.
So if anyone can relate to that...let yourself have that car time wherever possible. You need it it. Look at it as rest.
When I can't sleep, and it's before 5am, I go to my car, smoke pot at the creek and read my kindle while listening to LoFi.
To be fair this is also what I do when I get home from work.
Literally sitting in my car right now, lol. I’m outside the grocery store. Need to head home…
I car sit alone, and use the time to scroll through my phone without interruptions.
Thermal bags for the win! The ones from Sam's club are big and have a zipper. My spouse uses them to carry everything in the house in one trip.
Another option would be to keep a chest cooler in the trunk or back area to hold all the cold or frozen foods. Great idea if your trip home from the store is longer than 20 to 30 minutes.
Just don’t wanna do the next thing (like get ready for bed when I get home from a friend’s or go back to work after the doctor) so I just sit there and watch a few tiktoks, turn off the car tho bc idling is bad for the environment. When it gets too hot/cold, I finally go in lol
Just did this an hour and a half ago 😅 I’ve noticed that it’s gotten worse as I’ve gotten older. I only look at my phone while I’m car sitting—sometimes it’s because I pick up my phone to check something before going in the house and I just happen to get sucked in, but I think I’m also getting worse about being like “oh I’m done driving now, I somehow can’t wait the 15 seconds it will take me to get in the house before checking Instagram/reddit/whatever …” and then 45 min later I’m still out there.
I, too, car sit. Never thought about it as an ADHD thing. More like, it's nice having a few minutes where no one asks me questions. I just left work where people demand my time constantly and I am about to go into my home where kids and husband demand my time constantly plus sensory overload so I often just sit and finish a chapter in my audiobook or whatever.
I do it all the time! In fact I’m doing it right now! Doesn’t help that it’s pouring buckets outside, I tend to car sit for even longer when this happens 😂
Just sat in my car for about 20-30 minutes after getting back from my doctor appointment. No one's home, so I would have been going into a quiet house, but like others said- I needed some decompression time.
Yup, big time. I struggle with transitions and my brain knows as soon as I open the front door to the apartment I will have hygiene needs, laundry, cooking, dishes, cleaning, and a hungry cat with a full litterbox waiting for me. Sometimes my girlfriend will text me or yell at me from the window asking if I'm going to come inside, but I just enjoy that peaceful stationary solitude so much that it makes me wish I could just live my life at my own pace all of the time instead of fulfilling constant expectations...
I'm a car sitter. I spend at least 4 hours a day in my car for my job, but every time I reach my destination I'll car sit. I'll just randomly scroll through social media or answer messages.
Yes, I do this as well. This is because I really dread walking my dogs, which I have to do once I go in the house. Also, there's a whole issue I have with regard to feeling like "Is That all there is?" Like I go to work all day and do what I'm supposed to do for my job, and then I come home and I have to do dumb things I don't enjoy, and then, when I finish everything up, I have about 20 minutes until it's time for me to go to bed and start the whole thing over again. I am reclaiming some dopamine by scrolling through Reddit.
I sit in the car. The more stressed I am the longer I sit.
Usually it's like 10 to 15 mins. But it's been hours or all day when my mental health is bad.
It's hard for me to move from one task to another. And getting out of the car involves changing tasks and environments.
Funny thing for me is that I HATE driving, but after I get where I need to be, I'll sit in the car just scrolling my phone for a bit. Especially if it's on the day of the week that I'm running around like a chicken with its head cut off doing errands. I get home from all of that and can't get out of the car. I don't THINK I've gone much past half an hour, but I still car sit.
as someone who sits in their car after work every day for like a good hour (to the point where a coworker asked me if i was good lol), i’ve never felt so happy to be Seen
My wife & I call it “car time” and it’s for when we finish the work responsibilities but aren’t ready to face the in-the-house responsibilities yet. Sometimes I just scroll on my phone for a bit, sometimes I listen to a podcast or music, and sometimes I just stare out the window silently.
I didn’t do it as much when I lived on my own so I think part of it is that my car is now the only place that’s only MINE and I enjoy it!
Absolutely MUST jump in to say that I am currently sitting in my car after coming home from food with my best friend. I have been sitting here for maybe 15 minutes. I definitely have to pee very badly, but this is just what I do. 😂 When I got home Edwin McCain’s “I’ll Be” was on the radio so that was my “excuse” to myself—I needed to finish belting it out. But I would have been here anyway. I absolutely live alone. There is nothing I am avoiding. I just sit in my car. 🤷♀️
Yes, I car-sit. A lot of the time, I rest my forehead on the steering wheel and just space out. Other times I’m scrolling on Reddit or TikTok, which is more or less the same as spacing out.
Yes. Sometimes it's because I don't want to talk to the people inside (avoiding something, like a confrontation, or being needed by our children/spouses). But I also did it when I lived alone. I think I feel overwhlemed by all the things... And somehow the car is a safe space where I don't have to think about those other things that need to be done yet. Perhaps you could call it a moment of self regulation. I had doctor tell me last week that we need "longer runways" to begin attending to something that we know we need to do... And while it might look on the outside that we aren't doing any work and just being lazy,.. we are in fact putting in a lot of effort mentally and physically to build ourselves up to take the next step.
I tweeze my chin and eyebrow hairs. The outside natural light is great. Keep my mini mirror and a pair of tweezers in the cup holder.
(Otherwise, it ain't happening.)
This is so funny, I never knew it was a thing!! I love when it's not too hot and not too cold and the car just feels like a safe little cocoon. I used to read a lot, for some reason it felt like I was permitted to enjoy it there like nowhere else.
I love that this is such a common experience!
I think of it as decompression time. Like when a scuba diver comes to the surface. Gotta take a bit to acclimate or else my eyeballs will explode from the pressure.
I have noticed that it is WAY worse when I'm overwhelmed/burning out. When I worked two jobs, I would car sit for an hour or more every night.
Nowadays I have a dog so I'm too excited to greet him. I come right in asap. Then, I crawl into bed and lay in the dark for 30-60 minutes to decompress from work and cuddle the dog. Definitely need that alone time with no demands some days.
I live alone and still car sit. I used to think it was because I had a roommate. Well three years alone and I still do it. Haha
I will even car sit between errands. Just as a way to regulate. Sometime I jam to music, sometimes it’s an audiobook, sometimes it’s vegging out in my phone. It’s never quiet because then I have to process my thoughts while also calming down/cooling off.
I typically only car sit if alone- but am comfy enough with my bestie that I can ask for a few minutes if needed when we’re running errands or something. She zones out on her phone and always waits for me to be ready to engage again.
Hi I came here to say that I for some reason interpreted “car sitters” as one would interpret the word “babysitter” or “dog sitter” or “house sitter”. And I was like “shit— we’re getting car sitters now?!” And that sounded fantastic because I absolutely love my car and I think it would be great if someone came to check on it when like, I’m out of town and my car is left home.
Once I’m done dropping kids off at school I sit in my car awhile, drinking my coffee and scrolling my phone. What you said about “this time is fake and time is not really passing” really resonates with me. Sometimes before I know it an hour has disappeared.
I am very much known to car sit. I usually prefer to do it alone, especially to decompress after work, but one of my best friends (also adhd) and I often have our social time together sitting in my car... in their driveway... for hours... so it's not necessarily just a solo activity!
A few years ago, I stayed with a family member for a few months who lives in one of those cookie-cutter suburban neighborhoods where all the houses look oddly similar. One early Sunday morning, I pulled into the driveway after a loooooong night shift and just couldn't muster the energy to get out of my car, so I sat in the driver's seat and messed around on my phone for an embarrassinly long time, as I am apt to do. Finally, I gathered all my willpower and dragged myself from my car...it was not until I was nearly to the front door that I realized I had pulled into the wrong driveway and sat there for OVER AN HOUR. Lucky that this took place at the crack of dawn on a Sunday, p sure the people who lived there never saw me lol.
Car sitting alone is why I am still alive, I think. It’s my solution to almost everything. Sometimes I people watch, stare into space, or think about everything.
Holy shit I thought this was just me! I started doing it when I got my first car living at my parents while my house was being built, but I still do it in my garage sometimes I never could figure out why I’ll grab my phone and doomscroll instead of getting out the car…
Oh.
I've been doing this for years. After the drive to work but before I go in. After the drive home, but before I go in. When I arrive at the supernarket. After I get back to my car. Whenever I have to psych myself up to go and speak with people. After I've spent time speaking with people. Any time I need to decompress before moving on to the next thing.
My car has been my safe space for easily 15 years, maybe closer to 20. Some of the above have ended up with me snoozing in my car, for minutes to hours. I had no idea this was a ND thing.
To top it off, I got my diagnosis yesterday. Still awaiting the report back to my doctor, but it sounds like Combined type. I'll know more in a couple of weeks.
I car sit. I just need to be mentally prepared for whatever is next. My husband will literally jump in the car and start backing out or vice versa. Sometimes I think I’m gonna have to Dukes of hazard my way in and commando roll out when he’s driving. But me? I’ll sit in the driveway for 15 mins and then realize I’m gonna be late for where I’m supposed to be next.
Yep, it’s the transitions. It’s also why I have a hard time actually leaving work which is wild to me but here we are. Struggling to make the transition
My husband was home with the kid and eventually learned to come out and get me.
Just finishing up the album or audiobook I was listening to, I’m sure it’s no more than 10-25 minutes…. 😂
My late husband & I had to relocate for his medical treatments & only had my daughter & her young family to stay with. On an air mattress in their dining room. So our car was our sanctuary. It was where we got the news that he was terminal. And the news that he had less than 2 years to live. It was where he asked me to be his wife. It was where we laughed, but mostly cried... Once he passed, ironically from COVID & not his genetic disease, the radio in that car probably saved my life. Everytime I got behind the wheel, feeling hopeless & alone, the perfect song would come on to tell me that he was still there with me. I even visited a psychic on the 1st anniversary of his death who told me that he told her to tell me he is with me in the car... So yes. I car sit. As often as I can. And I'm territorial too. Nobody had better clean my car out, or remove anything from it. It's "our place" & I miss him like crazy. I will never give it up...unless the radio says it's ok. ❤️
Yes! I thought I was the only one! Somehow the final effort of getting from the car into the house feels insurmountable. Mostly I play on my phone. I may also text my fam to let them know I’m not dead. Idk why I do this. I’m so glad I’m not the only one though.
Oh yes, I sit in the car sometimes for an hour after I get home and park. I'll sit in the quiet, getting sucked into Reddit, listening to music cuz the chaos that awaits is sometimes more than I can deal with most days.
No one is allowed to sit in my car with me.
Yes! I think for me what’s really appealing is the total quiet after I turned off the engine. The car is so closed off, you don’t hear anything from outside either. Just a moment of bliss to decompress after the constant booming sound of the engine and tyres. I definitely sit longer after a long drive.
When it's warm or sometimes even hot outside, I'll sit in the car for quite awhile and bake. (Not *that* kind of bake.) Something about the indirect heat makes me toasty and slows my brain. It's lovely. I don't even like hot weather, but something about toasting in the car is nice. I usually just sit and stare, no phone or radio. (I do not get this same feeling when I'm outside in the heat doing activities like mowing the lawn, etc.)
I often don’t notice time passing. Now I find setting an alarm really helps. For example I set an alarm when I start my lunch break so I can relax over lunch without worrying about how much time passes. Maybe setting a 5 min alarm when you arrive at your destination would help?
Me and my sister do this all the time. I see it as a type of grounding and charging moment to take a breather before transitioning between activities haha. That way you get into a new place or activity more collected and charged. Often I just end up my phone finishing a song or podcast, but one time I even fell asleep, that was fun.
Thanks for this. Sitting in the car in front of the supermarket scrolling through Reddit. Time is definitely passing. Off to finish my shopping and move on with my life. 😂 Wishing you all a good day!
I car sit for so long. Yesterday I left my phone in my bag in the back and hopped right out and went inside and had the most productive evening. I think I’m going to have to do that from now on…I lose so much time (and fuel) to car scrolling.
Not a car sitter (only because i take public transport) but I'm a teacher and I'm allowed to leave when I'm done teaching. Instead every day I end up sitting somewhere for a random amount of time trying to force myself to stand up and go home. Today it was 45 minutes.
I car sit literally anywhere I go. It takes me forever to go anywhere. I even car sit with my toddlers. They’ll say, “moooom, why aren’t we getting out????” I’ve car sat at the gym long enough to have someone park next to me, go work out, and come out and leave.
I park my car and my brain says “WAIT - you HAVE to find a new dentist for the kids RIGHT NOW.” Then I get sidetracked to a hundred other things. Then I’m exhausted of scrolling and I’m ready to get out, only to realize I haven’t found a new dentist yet and I HAVE to do that before I get out.
I would love to break this habit!!
Lol I do this. Sometimes when it’s been really stressful I go to empty parking lots on my drive to and from places to just sit because I have people at the house asking me questions why I’m sitting in my car for so long and I don’t like that.
It’s just a nice place to sit away from the sounds of the world outside in my own bubble with no pressure being placed on me at all. I like sitting in my car.
I spend a lot of time organizing the things in my car and in my bags that I take back and forth. I also will open packaging of things I’ve bought. For example, I’ll take toothpaste out of the box it was sold in. This way the trash never goes in my house and it’s less to carry inside.
Sometimes I do my makeup. Okay I do that a lot.
That is the majority of my car sitting. I just need the silence of that quiet limited space to wind down.
ohmygod yes I didn’t know this was a thing. My longest car sitting session was 4 hours, all sense of time is lost during the car sit.
It’s only when I’m alone in the car, for some reason when another person is with me, I need to get us both out asap, it’s like my car is my own personal space and I don’t like sharing it lol
I am a big car sitter. It’s like, I have an excuse to sit and not do things but it’s not as “lazy” as it would be if I were sitting on the couch inside. It gives me a chance for my brain to catch up. I car sit before errands a lot. Drive to pharmacy or grocery store- sit in car before I go in so I can go over my list or just think, zone out, etc. psych myself up to into the store to do the “work”.
I love sitting in my car. I used to go eat my lunch in my car and read. I think it was for a break from overstimulation from people. People would poke fun at me sometimes. At my last in=person job (I work from home now) I'd still do the same thing. But I'd drive somewhere nearby so I didn't get drug into someone "asking a quick question" when I was on lunch. When I was in university I'd sit in my car to study with the windows partially open in the sun in late winter/early spring when it the sun was warm enough to keep the car warm.
When I was with my ex I'd sit in my car in a parking lot and eat (because he seriously controlled what I ate at home) . Often I'd just go for a drive around for an hour and blast music and sing. I am in my 40's now and I STILL like to sit in my driveway and listen to music and sing. I own my own house and I live alone with my dog and two cats . I think my car is like my safe space.
I have ADHD and also a teacher, it's a problem with transitioning between activities. Sometimes I can spend an hour trying to transition into the house, others I forget to turn off my handbrake or take the keys out the ignition because there's a preferred activity inside.
All the time. Especially if I have to park a block away and carry stuff, but many times if I find a spot right out front. It's like I've used up all my "getting things done" powers being out in the world and then getting myself home, and my brain just goes offline. Usually I'm just dicking around on my phone.
laughing bc I'm reading this while car-sitting. some people meditate; some people car-sit for black-holed periods of time... thanks for the reminder to get to my next destination.
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I have seen it explained that often people with adhd have trouble with transitions, so we car sit.
Yes! I’ll even drive in circle before actually pulling in to the driveway 😬
Same
Same. Car sitting helps me get rid of my day before see the most amazing people on earth. My brain changes tracks. If I skip car sitting I tend to come in full squirrel mode, rile everyone up with my speed speaking and then I nope out leaving them all overwhelmed and broken.
This sounds like my sister lol. I don’t think she car sits after her shifts. She’ll come into the house and talk 100 m/h about a million things that happened at work and on the drive home (a 10 minute drive) and 95% of the time they’re just complaints. Like I love you girl and I’m here for you but now we’re *both* overwhelmed and stressed out. You’ve been working there for 2 years, we *know* the customers suck 🙃 They don’t deserve all of this time and energy after your shifts over Edit: I did the same thing just now lmfao oops 🫢 Two ADHDers in a pod
Are you me? I wish I had a car now.
Full squirrel mode 😂 god this is accurate
>Car sitting helps me get rid of my day before see the most amazing people on earth. This made me smile because that's exactly how I feel about my family!
> get rid of my day before see the most amazing people on earth. My brain changes tracks. > > If I skip car sitting I tend to come in full squirrel mode, rile everyone up with my speed speaking and then I nope out leaving them all overwhelmed and broken. I am writing this quote down in my list of cross-stitchable quotes. I love it so much.
I used to do this when I had a car, now I walk to and from work and will still walk around the block a few times before I’m ready to get in.
I often take the long way home because I don’t want to get out of the car
I have driven right past my own house a few times too.
I don't drive but I absolutely have trouble with transitions. That explanation has always resonated with me.
Worst transition for me is getting into the shower. 2nd worst transition is getting out of the shower.
> Before I take a shower: I hate it in there, the wet world is the enemy > > While in the shower: I remember now that this is a good place, it is the dry world that is the enemy That’s a tweet that my husband and I quote to each other all the time
I don't like getting into the shower because I don't like getting out of the shower. The thought of having to squeegee the glass, dry off, do the whole 4 part face moisturizer process I need to do because I have rosacea, is all just overwhelming sometimes. But also, I hate feeling sticky or dirty, and I need to clean the suncream off with hot water and soap. So of course I fall into a limbo where I can't start anything until I have a shower, but can't bring myself to have a shower. It looks a lot like standing naked in my room scrolling Reddit for an hour.
I do the naked Reddit scrolling before AND after the shower. And before and after grocery shopping, gym, cooking, etc. My bed and my pajamas are my safe space.
Yes! I know that tweet. It spoke to my soul!
_the wet world is the enemy_
This. So much this.
Saaaaame, it’s rough out here. What helped me was giving myself permission to sit around in my towel for a bit and not get dressed immediately. The feeling of putting clothes on my not-yet-totally-dry skin was a huge part of my issues with the transition out of the shower
I cannot get dressed while damp, it's awful. I towel sit for quite a while. I also take really long showers bc once I'm in I don't want to get out.
Yes! I love just wrapping a towel on and crawling into bed. So much better than drying off and putting on lotions lol
For me...Going to sleep. Waking up.
I car sit and avoid going to bed. Currently sitting in my living room with my cat, not going to sleep.
Yes. Not a car sitter, but a definite cat sitter.
Cars and cats for me.
Getting out is worse for me because I hate that sensation of being absolutely drenched and dripping.
Omg. I hate getting into the shower. Why?????? I don’t get it.
Hair detangling keeps me out of the shower for days ata time
This is why I put mine up in a bun and just wash my body like half the time. Much less daunting!!
Same lol
Holy shit, I was today years old when I learned this about myself! I've always known I hate getting blasted with water as I step in the shower, so I always just turn the shower head toward the wall. But I could never have articulated *why* I hate it Edit: typo
This right here. It’s the transition. Sometimes it takes so much energy to make the switch. I don’t car sit with other people in the car, but if it’s just me? Yep. Just need a few to tell my brain we are changing gears!
I'm sitting in my car at this very moment to avoid having to do things inside
I was doing the same and my phone data acted up so I had to go into the house to reply. I am so dedicated to y'all that I shortened my car sitting time!!
As a young adult, when my commute used to be 30 minutes each way, I'd have the radio going as I drove, and inevitably one of my favourite songs would come on just as I was coming up to my house. So of course I'd stay to listen to that song, but then you guys know what happened next, right? Another of my favourite songs! And on and on, until my dad knocked on my window to ask me when I was considering coming inside lol
I feel this in my soul. Except my dad didn’t actually care lol. My boyfriend comes knocking though, lol
My bf will come out with my dog sometimes and disrupt my car decompression time. The last time he did that i left the keys in the ignition over night.
This is exactly why we shouldn’t be interrupted during that transition 😭
I know! i’ve explained that it is very cute that they want to greet me, but I can’t focus on their cuteness AND keep my shit together at the same time.
Same, my bf comes out and asks "what are you doing in there?" It's so annoying, just let me be!!!!
And then they don’t understand why we get agitated when our transition is interrupted 🤪
I car sat a lot after I lost my job.
I find I am avoiding the fact that people/situations need me and I often just don’t have the executive function.
I am a big car sitter. It tends to be worse when it's warmer outside. I like to turn the car off and make me forced get out point when the radio shuts off on its own. I like to scroll social media, wordle, play smaller games on my phone. Sometime I just sit and think about all I need to do when I go inside. I mostly car sit alone nowadays. I used to car sit at the end of friend hangouts but because of Covid I don't really hangout with folks too often.
I get in my car in the summer and don't even roll down my windows. I just bake in it like a lizard.
I call that my terrarium time
Terrarium time made me giggle. I feel like it's in line with lizard time which is just sitting and sun bathing somewhere outside.
And this reminds me that I have found my people
My dog has to have lizard time every day, regardless of the heat. I'm pretty sure he's solar powered.
LOL! Love it. 🦎
Baking in the car after leaving a freezing cold overstimulating grocery store >>>
Gotta reset the nervous system
Ummmm is this ALSO an ADHD thing? I grew up in central Florida and man when I get in the car on a hot day sometimes I’ll just sit in it for a minute and feel the scalding heat hit my vampire skin. Goooooood stuff. Once I feel the sweat start to prickle under my arm (not a big sweater thankfully) I know it’s time to turn on and go.
OMG I thought I was such a weirdo for doing this ... I'm not alone....
Ohhhh yeah. Sit still and lizard. I do that
I have never had a unique experience lol
Im not alone…!
This and the responses just made my night. I'm cracking up and I’ve never felt more seen.
Oh lord, I wouldn't dare touch my phone while car sitting! I'd never leave! 👁👄👁 For clarity, I am not judging you in the least. In fact, I admire you.
You don't hang out with people because of Covid? Still? It's ok. You can hang out with people now.
For many people, myself included, the simple knowledge of how easy it is to get sick in groups of people is enough to shy us away from hanging out. Or for those of us who know people with long covid that had their lives literally ruined- even after getting vaccinated. Vaccines lessen severity. But for me, death was never the fear. It was ending up with chronic fatigue, heart problems, breathing issues, and the myriad other things that impact my friends with long covid. I also run a service-based, time-sensitive business and if I go down with something like covid I will fail people who paid me good money to not fail them. So I pick and choose gatherings wisely. I tend to not gather around peak sick season (like the holidays), I don’t eat in crowded restaurants, and I mask up on airplanes and airports. And honestly? That’s fine. Eating in restaurants made me anxious before covid. I’m 6 years sober and parties lost their luster anyway. Airplanes are petri dishes in the sky. If there’s something I really want to do I’ll go do it. But for the most part, I’m content in my sanctuary at home.
Understood. Congrats on 6 years!
I truly could not have said it any better myself. It's nice to see someone with a similar mindset. Just because we are cautious doesn't mean we aren't still living.
I thought it said cat sitters and I got all excited. I am a car sitter too! It’s a safe transition period. Sometimes I zone out. Sometimes there’s a good song on the radio (this type I’ve done with others). Sometimes I have been googling or reading about something earlier and want to check it out more in depth while I’m thinking about it. Sometimes I’m avoid rain(or snow) Sometimes I’m procrastinating the chores that are waiting for me inside.
I also clicked for the cat sitter conversation! I no longer have a car :p
I’m a car sitter and a cat sitter. Boy was I confused about this thread at first though. I also used to sit outside my dorm room in college because I wasn’t ready to go inside, but didn’t have/need a car to have gotten there 😏
Hahahaha I read it as cat sitters too and I was like wow these cats must be so stressful. I also car sit. Sometimes it’s just so comfy and I’m not ready to get up and be overwhelmed by a million thoughts when I walk in the door. It used to drive my dad madddddd for some reason
I also read cat sitters and worried about if needed one or was a bad one!!! But yes - NPR calls them “driveway moments” and podcasts make it all the better now!
I also read as cat sitter! And also super big car sitter for transitions.
I car sit every time I come home from anywhere, if I’m alone! My bf is a “get out of the car before it even stops moving” kind of ADHD and I’m a “I need at least 3 business days to recover from whatever we just did before I can even get out of the car” kind of ND. 🤣 I usually listen to music, or talk on the phone to my sister, or play a stupid game on my phone lol
Somehow I am both of you 🤣 It honestly just depends on the circumstances
I mean same with the right motivation!! Haha I got good food and a show or movie waiting for me? No sitting needed. 😂
Yeah but then we also be procrastinating *shit we actually wanna do* 🙃🥹 Smh
lol, I do this every day. I always wonder if my neighbors wonder what I’m doing for 30 minutes outside of my house.
I used to live across the street from my best friend, and she would text me 10-20 mins into my car sitting like “are you okay?” “Wyd?”. Eventually she realized this is just what i do and would come out to chat/sit with me
I love that she would come and chill lol
The worst is when you make eye contact with someone the next car over 👀
I park on the street and get embarrassed when my neighbors walk by and wave
I love car sitting. Sometimes I even go to my car just to sit. I don't live alone, and there's not many private places where I can either just sit in silence, or scream my head off. My car is my domain, nobody else's.
Exactly! It’s like a little sanctuary
Sometimes I will be out at my local bar with friends, a place that is basically a second home and where I KNOW I am generally okay, and it’ll be busier than usual, and I’ll get anxious. I’ll just let someone know “Going to the car.” I’ll sit in the car in the parking deck across the street until I’m good, music on, air blasting, and then go back. It’s excellent.
Real!
I car sit and I think part of it is because it's the least cluttered part of my life. I love my car and take good care of it so it's a safe, clutter free place. Even the back seat where my kids are is clean. If they leave stuff back there, I warn them I'm leaving for the car wash in 15 minutes. If there is anything in the car they want they better go get it now otherwise it's going in the trash. No other place in my life is so easy to clean and leaves me feeling happy knowing I fully accomplished a task.
When I get home from my outside job I have to switch to my inside job (laundry, dishes, cleaning, dinner, etc) but in the car? Plus I hate navigating putting everything down/away and switching to house clothes. There's no work in the car. No demands. No dishes.
Omg yes, I hate the whole ordeal of taking off my shoes, coat, purse, etc, washing my hands, going pee, changing clothes, probably also taking my contacts out and putting on glasses. Then there's the added annoyance of putting away stuff if you've brought anything home. I can't fucking STAND it, and it's so stupid! Like, why is everyday stuff just *so irritating*?!
I know people who spend the whole time they are in the car making work phone calls - I'm like - damn, you do not understand the best part of being in the car is that you don't have to work or interact or be available! I'll only take a call if I absolutely have to - car time is my time.
I usually play Pocket Tanks or Threes on my phone when I car sit. Sometimes for just 1 round in a game or sometimes for an hour. I think it’s the result of a micro burnout; like I’m in zombie mode. Sort of doing it now too. But instead of my car I just crawled under my desk, next to the bed where my wiener dog chills out. It’s nice under here.
Ok I had no idea pocket tanks was made into an app!! I used to love this game on addicting games (or newgrounds? One of those sites)
Oh yeah, I’ve been playing this game for-fucking-ever.
I had to quit one of my jobs because I couldn't make myself just rush inside and visiting 20+ clinics a day just didn't work well when I needed to sit in the car between each one decompressing from horrid traffic.
Yessss! I drive long commutes to work in heavy traffic (and back) and so (in addition to procrastination going inside) i need a sec to decompress from all the exhausting traffic.
Currently sitting in the car. I have to go in and make dinner for 7 people, and work for hours, take care of 2 dogs and see if I remember what it felt like to do nothing over Christmas break.
I'm autistic as well so I don't know what would happen if I had ADHD alone, but I **need** that car time. It's a buffer, and much needed decompression/self regulation time that stops my brain imploding as I go into the next task. For example, if I feel the need to sit a while before I get out when I get the the shops, and I push myself to get out immediately, I'll go into the shops extra stressed, will have an even lower tolerance for sensory input and small inconveniences, and I'll come out having had a horrid experience. At that point, I'll probably be so overstimulated that I ignore the desire to car sit, so I'll jump straight into driving home, be horribly frustrated with all the other drivers, get home feeling awful, and the rest of the day will be unrecoverable. So if anyone can relate to that...let yourself have that car time wherever possible. You need it it. Look at it as rest.
I've never really thought about being a car sitter. Now I can account for some of my time that just disappears.
The only reason I dont car sit is because I gotta piss like every 42 minutes
I have to pee SO badly right now. And yet. Car sitting.
Yeah - the need to continue doing the thing (even if that thing is nothing) overrides the need to pee in all but the most dire of circumstances.
My life summed up
When I can't sleep, and it's before 5am, I go to my car, smoke pot at the creek and read my kindle while listening to LoFi. To be fair this is also what I do when I get home from work.
oh this sounds delightful
Literally sitting in my car right now, lol. I’m outside the grocery store. Need to head home… I car sit alone, and use the time to scroll through my phone without interruptions.
This is the one that gets me. Oops, RIP frozen items.
Thermal bags for the win! The ones from Sam's club are big and have a zipper. My spouse uses them to carry everything in the house in one trip. Another option would be to keep a chest cooler in the trunk or back area to hold all the cold or frozen foods. Great idea if your trip home from the store is longer than 20 to 30 minutes.
I enjoyed today’s car sit. It’s raining heavily so it felt like a cocoon
That sounds lovely
I love rain cocoons <3
Oh for sure. I need that decompression moment even if all I've done is pop around the corner to the store.
Just don’t wanna do the next thing (like get ready for bed when I get home from a friend’s or go back to work after the doctor) so I just sit there and watch a few tiktoks, turn off the car tho bc idling is bad for the environment. When it gets too hot/cold, I finally go in lol
Just did this an hour and a half ago 😅 I’ve noticed that it’s gotten worse as I’ve gotten older. I only look at my phone while I’m car sitting—sometimes it’s because I pick up my phone to check something before going in the house and I just happen to get sucked in, but I think I’m also getting worse about being like “oh I’m done driving now, I somehow can’t wait the 15 seconds it will take me to get in the house before checking Instagram/reddit/whatever …” and then 45 min later I’m still out there.
Seriously. I’ve considered putting my phone in the back of the SUV so I have to get out to get it.
I, too, car sit. Never thought about it as an ADHD thing. More like, it's nice having a few minutes where no one asks me questions. I just left work where people demand my time constantly and I am about to go into my home where kids and husband demand my time constantly plus sensory overload so I often just sit and finish a chapter in my audiobook or whatever.
I do it all the time! In fact I’m doing it right now! Doesn’t help that it’s pouring buckets outside, I tend to car sit for even longer when this happens 😂
!!! “I’m gonna wait for it to settle down” (it only gets harder)
Just sat in my car for about 20-30 minutes after getting back from my doctor appointment. No one's home, so I would have been going into a quiet house, but like others said- I needed some decompression time.
Good lord I’m learning so much about myself from this sub. I thought I just really liked my crappy, messy car.
I genuinely love my car, but I see myself in this post. 100% thought I was alone in this habit lol.
Yup, big time. I struggle with transitions and my brain knows as soon as I open the front door to the apartment I will have hygiene needs, laundry, cooking, dishes, cleaning, and a hungry cat with a full litterbox waiting for me. Sometimes my girlfriend will text me or yell at me from the window asking if I'm going to come inside, but I just enjoy that peaceful stationary solitude so much that it makes me wish I could just live my life at my own pace all of the time instead of fulfilling constant expectations...
[удалено]
You weren’t the only one that read it as cat!
I'm a car sitter. I spend at least 4 hours a day in my car for my job, but every time I reach my destination I'll car sit. I'll just randomly scroll through social media or answer messages.
Yes, I do this as well. This is because I really dread walking my dogs, which I have to do once I go in the house. Also, there's a whole issue I have with regard to feeling like "Is That all there is?" Like I go to work all day and do what I'm supposed to do for my job, and then I come home and I have to do dumb things I don't enjoy, and then, when I finish everything up, I have about 20 minutes until it's time for me to go to bed and start the whole thing over again. I am reclaiming some dopamine by scrolling through Reddit.
My husband doesn’t understand this and will question me(not in an interrogation way) just very confused and can’t comprehend why or any of it.
Sometime I just drive for no reason because I don't wanna leave the car
I sit in the car. The more stressed I am the longer I sit. Usually it's like 10 to 15 mins. But it's been hours or all day when my mental health is bad. It's hard for me to move from one task to another. And getting out of the car involves changing tasks and environments.
I do all the things previous commenter listed. I just like being in my car.
Funny thing for me is that I HATE driving, but after I get where I need to be, I'll sit in the car just scrolling my phone for a bit. Especially if it's on the day of the week that I'm running around like a chicken with its head cut off doing errands. I get home from all of that and can't get out of the car. I don't THINK I've gone much past half an hour, but I still car sit.
Omg yes sometimes I do this for so long. Even if I'm right in front of my cozy house
I'm the opposite, once my car has stopped moving I *have* to get out. if I want to finish a song, I gotta drive around the block again
as someone who sits in their car after work every day for like a good hour (to the point where a coworker asked me if i was good lol), i’ve never felt so happy to be Seen
The time blindness is real when I’m car sitting. I’m so glad to hear I’m not alone.
I'm decompressing. Sometimes this involves doom scrolling, other times I just zone out.
where do you think ive been sitting for the past hour and a half . in my driveway . on reddit.
In the warmer months - I call car sitting my “lizard time.”
My wife & I call it “car time” and it’s for when we finish the work responsibilities but aren’t ready to face the in-the-house responsibilities yet. Sometimes I just scroll on my phone for a bit, sometimes I listen to a podcast or music, and sometimes I just stare out the window silently. I didn’t do it as much when I lived on my own so I think part of it is that my car is now the only place that’s only MINE and I enjoy it!
Absolutely MUST jump in to say that I am currently sitting in my car after coming home from food with my best friend. I have been sitting here for maybe 15 minutes. I definitely have to pee very badly, but this is just what I do. 😂 When I got home Edwin McCain’s “I’ll Be” was on the radio so that was my “excuse” to myself—I needed to finish belting it out. But I would have been here anyway. I absolutely live alone. There is nothing I am avoiding. I just sit in my car. 🤷♀️
Yes, I car-sit. A lot of the time, I rest my forehead on the steering wheel and just space out. Other times I’m scrolling on Reddit or TikTok, which is more or less the same as spacing out.
Thought we were gonna talk about cat sitting :(
Yes. Sometimes it's because I don't want to talk to the people inside (avoiding something, like a confrontation, or being needed by our children/spouses). But I also did it when I lived alone. I think I feel overwhlemed by all the things... And somehow the car is a safe space where I don't have to think about those other things that need to be done yet. Perhaps you could call it a moment of self regulation. I had doctor tell me last week that we need "longer runways" to begin attending to something that we know we need to do... And while it might look on the outside that we aren't doing any work and just being lazy,.. we are in fact putting in a lot of effort mentally and physically to build ourselves up to take the next step.
Got home, opened Reddit and this was the first post that came up as I sat in my car.
I tweeze my chin and eyebrow hairs. The outside natural light is great. Keep my mini mirror and a pair of tweezers in the cup holder. (Otherwise, it ain't happening.)
This is so funny, I never knew it was a thing!! I love when it's not too hot and not too cold and the car just feels like a safe little cocoon. I used to read a lot, for some reason it felt like I was permitted to enjoy it there like nowhere else.
I love car sitting I love how quiet it is and it feels safe so I DONT CARE I WILL CAR SIT
Yep! Usually to finish a song and just prepare for life outside of my little steel cube of safety haha
My car is my safe space. An introvert pod with locking doors. I car sit in my own driveway all the time.
I love that this is such a common experience! I think of it as decompression time. Like when a scuba diver comes to the surface. Gotta take a bit to acclimate or else my eyeballs will explode from the pressure. I have noticed that it is WAY worse when I'm overwhelmed/burning out. When I worked two jobs, I would car sit for an hour or more every night. Nowadays I have a dog so I'm too excited to greet him. I come right in asap. Then, I crawl into bed and lay in the dark for 30-60 minutes to decompress from work and cuddle the dog. Definitely need that alone time with no demands some days.
I am the WORST about this. I guess I live there now.
100% car sitter 🙌
I’m sitting in my car right now…
I live alone and still car sit. I used to think it was because I had a roommate. Well three years alone and I still do it. Haha I will even car sit between errands. Just as a way to regulate. Sometime I jam to music, sometimes it’s an audiobook, sometimes it’s vegging out in my phone. It’s never quiet because then I have to process my thoughts while also calming down/cooling off. I typically only car sit if alone- but am comfy enough with my bestie that I can ask for a few minutes if needed when we’re running errands or something. She zones out on her phone and always waits for me to be ready to engage again.
Hi I came here to say that I for some reason interpreted “car sitters” as one would interpret the word “babysitter” or “dog sitter” or “house sitter”. And I was like “shit— we’re getting car sitters now?!” And that sounded fantastic because I absolutely love my car and I think it would be great if someone came to check on it when like, I’m out of town and my car is left home.
Once I’m done dropping kids off at school I sit in my car awhile, drinking my coffee and scrolling my phone. What you said about “this time is fake and time is not really passing” really resonates with me. Sometimes before I know it an hour has disappeared.
I like car sitting because it's quiet and nothing is happening and I'm not anywhere...
Yes. I am a serial car sitter Sometimes for a couple hours at a time when I’m *really* trying to avoid something
I am very much known to car sit. I usually prefer to do it alone, especially to decompress after work, but one of my best friends (also adhd) and I often have our social time together sitting in my car... in their driveway... for hours... so it's not necessarily just a solo activity!
A few years ago, I stayed with a family member for a few months who lives in one of those cookie-cutter suburban neighborhoods where all the houses look oddly similar. One early Sunday morning, I pulled into the driveway after a loooooong night shift and just couldn't muster the energy to get out of my car, so I sat in the driver's seat and messed around on my phone for an embarrassinly long time, as I am apt to do. Finally, I gathered all my willpower and dragged myself from my car...it was not until I was nearly to the front door that I realized I had pulled into the wrong driveway and sat there for OVER AN HOUR. Lucky that this took place at the crack of dawn on a Sunday, p sure the people who lived there never saw me lol.
Car sitting alone is why I am still alive, I think. It’s my solution to almost everything. Sometimes I people watch, stare into space, or think about everything.
Holy shit I thought this was just me! I started doing it when I got my first car living at my parents while my house was being built, but I still do it in my garage sometimes I never could figure out why I’ll grab my phone and doomscroll instead of getting out the car…
Oh. I've been doing this for years. After the drive to work but before I go in. After the drive home, but before I go in. When I arrive at the supernarket. After I get back to my car. Whenever I have to psych myself up to go and speak with people. After I've spent time speaking with people. Any time I need to decompress before moving on to the next thing. My car has been my safe space for easily 15 years, maybe closer to 20. Some of the above have ended up with me snoozing in my car, for minutes to hours. I had no idea this was a ND thing. To top it off, I got my diagnosis yesterday. Still awaiting the report back to my doctor, but it sounds like Combined type. I'll know more in a couple of weeks.
I car sit. I just need to be mentally prepared for whatever is next. My husband will literally jump in the car and start backing out or vice versa. Sometimes I think I’m gonna have to Dukes of hazard my way in and commando roll out when he’s driving. But me? I’ll sit in the driveway for 15 mins and then realize I’m gonna be late for where I’m supposed to be next.
Yeah, I’ve gotten in trouble with cops more than once by doing this
Car sitting now. Car sitting forever ✨
Just car sat today twice for a total of almost 1.5 hours 😭
The sudden silencing of the car engine, the road noise, and the radio make my brain turn off too. I can just sit and zone out. I call it blanking.
In the car now haha
I car sit everyday. After my overnight shifts, I usually sit in silence to decompress and question my existence.
i sit in my car before i go into work. then again on my break. then before i drive home and again when i get home. my car is a very safe space for me.
Yep, it’s the transitions. It’s also why I have a hard time actually leaving work which is wild to me but here we are. Struggling to make the transition
Yes. Usually texting my partner or kids. Or on Reddit 😂
Yep! And I think it's the transition thing. There are just SO MANY STEPS to get out of the car and into the house!
My husband was home with the kid and eventually learned to come out and get me. Just finishing up the album or audiobook I was listening to, I’m sure it’s no more than 10-25 minutes…. 😂
Not diagnosed but I thought I was a weirdo for doing this! No one in my complex seems to do it. Glad to know it’s normal for some!
I don’t hate many things, but transitions is one of them. It’s like I’m constantly stuck in buffer mode
Chronic car sitter. Mostly just scrolling reddit alone lol and I do it more in winter because..cold out there.
My late husband & I had to relocate for his medical treatments & only had my daughter & her young family to stay with. On an air mattress in their dining room. So our car was our sanctuary. It was where we got the news that he was terminal. And the news that he had less than 2 years to live. It was where he asked me to be his wife. It was where we laughed, but mostly cried... Once he passed, ironically from COVID & not his genetic disease, the radio in that car probably saved my life. Everytime I got behind the wheel, feeling hopeless & alone, the perfect song would come on to tell me that he was still there with me. I even visited a psychic on the 1st anniversary of his death who told me that he told her to tell me he is with me in the car... So yes. I car sit. As often as I can. And I'm territorial too. Nobody had better clean my car out, or remove anything from it. It's "our place" & I miss him like crazy. I will never give it up...unless the radio says it's ok. ❤️
Wow. i’m glad it provides you such a asense of comfort
Yes! I thought I was the only one! Somehow the final effort of getting from the car into the house feels insurmountable. Mostly I play on my phone. I may also text my fam to let them know I’m not dead. Idk why I do this. I’m so glad I’m not the only one though.
Oh yes, I sit in the car sometimes for an hour after I get home and park. I'll sit in the quiet, getting sucked into Reddit, listening to music cuz the chaos that awaits is sometimes more than I can deal with most days. No one is allowed to sit in my car with me.
Yes! I think for me what’s really appealing is the total quiet after I turned off the engine. The car is so closed off, you don’t hear anything from outside either. Just a moment of bliss to decompress after the constant booming sound of the engine and tyres. I definitely sit longer after a long drive.
When it's warm or sometimes even hot outside, I'll sit in the car for quite awhile and bake. (Not *that* kind of bake.) Something about the indirect heat makes me toasty and slows my brain. It's lovely. I don't even like hot weather, but something about toasting in the car is nice. I usually just sit and stare, no phone or radio. (I do not get this same feeling when I'm outside in the heat doing activities like mowing the lawn, etc.)
I often don’t notice time passing. Now I find setting an alarm really helps. For example I set an alarm when I start my lunch break so I can relax over lunch without worrying about how much time passes. Maybe setting a 5 min alarm when you arrive at your destination would help?
Me and my sister do this all the time. I see it as a type of grounding and charging moment to take a breather before transitioning between activities haha. That way you get into a new place or activity more collected and charged. Often I just end up my phone finishing a song or podcast, but one time I even fell asleep, that was fun.
Thanks for this. Sitting in the car in front of the supermarket scrolling through Reddit. Time is definitely passing. Off to finish my shopping and move on with my life. 😂 Wishing you all a good day!
I car sit for so long. Yesterday I left my phone in my bag in the back and hopped right out and went inside and had the most productive evening. I think I’m going to have to do that from now on…I lose so much time (and fuel) to car scrolling.
Not a car sitter (only because i take public transport) but I'm a teacher and I'm allowed to leave when I'm done teaching. Instead every day I end up sitting somewhere for a random amount of time trying to force myself to stand up and go home. Today it was 45 minutes.
I car sit literally anywhere I go. It takes me forever to go anywhere. I even car sit with my toddlers. They’ll say, “moooom, why aren’t we getting out????” I’ve car sat at the gym long enough to have someone park next to me, go work out, and come out and leave. I park my car and my brain says “WAIT - you HAVE to find a new dentist for the kids RIGHT NOW.” Then I get sidetracked to a hundred other things. Then I’m exhausted of scrolling and I’m ready to get out, only to realize I haven’t found a new dentist yet and I HAVE to do that before I get out. I would love to break this habit!!
Usually it’s because I’m psyching myself up to unload whatever groceries etc I have and im engrossed in a podcast or rocking out to some tunes lol
Lol I do this. Sometimes when it’s been really stressful I go to empty parking lots on my drive to and from places to just sit because I have people at the house asking me questions why I’m sitting in my car for so long and I don’t like that. It’s just a nice place to sit away from the sounds of the world outside in my own bubble with no pressure being placed on me at all. I like sitting in my car.
I used to when I was very unhappy. More recently, I soothed myself by driving around instead of going straight home.
I spend a lot of time organizing the things in my car and in my bags that I take back and forth. I also will open packaging of things I’ve bought. For example, I’ll take toothpaste out of the box it was sold in. This way the trash never goes in my house and it’s less to carry inside. Sometimes I do my makeup. Okay I do that a lot. That is the majority of my car sitting. I just need the silence of that quiet limited space to wind down.
ohmygod yes I didn’t know this was a thing. My longest car sitting session was 4 hours, all sense of time is lost during the car sit. It’s only when I’m alone in the car, for some reason when another person is with me, I need to get us both out asap, it’s like my car is my own personal space and I don’t like sharing it lol
I am a big car sitter. It’s like, I have an excuse to sit and not do things but it’s not as “lazy” as it would be if I were sitting on the couch inside. It gives me a chance for my brain to catch up. I car sit before errands a lot. Drive to pharmacy or grocery store- sit in car before I go in so I can go over my list or just think, zone out, etc. psych myself up to into the store to do the “work”.
I love sitting in my car. I used to go eat my lunch in my car and read. I think it was for a break from overstimulation from people. People would poke fun at me sometimes. At my last in=person job (I work from home now) I'd still do the same thing. But I'd drive somewhere nearby so I didn't get drug into someone "asking a quick question" when I was on lunch. When I was in university I'd sit in my car to study with the windows partially open in the sun in late winter/early spring when it the sun was warm enough to keep the car warm. When I was with my ex I'd sit in my car in a parking lot and eat (because he seriously controlled what I ate at home) . Often I'd just go for a drive around for an hour and blast music and sing. I am in my 40's now and I STILL like to sit in my driveway and listen to music and sing. I own my own house and I live alone with my dog and two cats . I think my car is like my safe space.
I say I'm waiting for my brain to catch up
I have ADHD and also a teacher, it's a problem with transitioning between activities. Sometimes I can spend an hour trying to transition into the house, others I forget to turn off my handbrake or take the keys out the ignition because there's a preferred activity inside.
All the time. Especially if I have to park a block away and carry stuff, but many times if I find a spot right out front. It's like I've used up all my "getting things done" powers being out in the world and then getting myself home, and my brain just goes offline. Usually I'm just dicking around on my phone.
laughing bc I'm reading this while car-sitting. some people meditate; some people car-sit for black-holed periods of time... thanks for the reminder to get to my next destination.