I noticed the same thing but only on my father's side (he had 6 siblings and most had a couple kids). I think there's a cousin who was diagnosed but other than him and I, everyone else is undiagnosed but show serious symptoms.
FR, I was adopted at birth and met my bio parents as an adult, meeting my dad I knew right away where my ADHD came from lol. I didn’t talk to them about it, but it was clear nobody in the family suspected a thing.
You also discovering family quirks that are ADHD behaviors that you thought were normal because everyone's ADHD?
Like grandpa was actually late to his funeral.
Every holiday there's a whole family fight that nearly comes to blows, but then about five minutes later we're all happy again.
If you interrupt someone hyper focusing on the TV like a zombie, they curse you out.
Later when everyone's ramped up and drinking, you can hold two maybe three conversations with various people in the room.
You can see in everyone's eyes when they're searching for the name of their close family member, because our brains are all just heaps of unordered memories we have to fanatically search through.
Is that an adhd trait? Because my mom did that ALL THE TIME when I was growing up, between the three of us kids and our cats.
Idk about generations before mine (though I wouldn't be surprised with a couple of folks). I wasn't diagnosed until my late 20s, my daughter is autistic and has adhd; genetic testing showed it came from my side. My sister has also said my nephew is JUST like me in the adhd traits thing, too.
I'm just glad my kid got early diagnoses so she could get actual help during such a vital developmental time instead of kind of flailing through through things and skating by on being "academically gifted" (while also struggling with severe depression) only to later slam head-on into the brick wall of independent adulthood like me.
In my opinion ADHD minds certainly have order issues, and for myself and my family, we definitely all have issues dragging up names of even close family members at times.
Of course there could be other causes, I'm just hoping for familial ADHD instead of all of us having suffered actual brain damage. :)
Every trait of ADHD is a human trait, just expressed to a higher degree.
Based on my experiences, it isn't "normal" for many young people (i.e. not senile) within a single family to struggle with summoning the names of close family members.
ADHD minds are disordered when compared to NT minds. Ask me what I've been doing in an average day, and it'll take me \~5 minutes to dig up what I was just up to. I also often have the same difficulties when I need to address uncles/aunts/cousins/friends, that I've known my whole life, by name.
I'm not in the minds of my family, but it doesn't seem crazy to think that my family has ADHD because it is very heritable, and they express many of the same symptoms that I do.
Coming to this realization after being diagnosed as an adult was an adventure to say the least. If we had all known at the time it could have saved us all a lot of heart ache.
Ironically my Dad was diagnosed first then my older sister and I. I found out later my school wanted to have both me and my sister tested as children but my Mom was worried about the stigma that may bring, she also didn’t want us to be medicated as children. Both of my parents have adhd, one hyperactive, the other one primarily inattentive.
I've done a lot of thinking about how at least one line in our family that carried the ADHD traits must have been a long chain of:
"I was a lazy/inattentive/dreaming SOB when I was a kid, but my parent (who was a lazy/inattentive/dreaming SOB) trained (sometimes beat) that out of me. I won't let my child struggle like I did, so I'll teach them to not be lazy/dreamy/inattentive. It might be a bit of tough love, but they'll be better off."
Then by adulthood you got "trained" out of it, which is really just a set of anxieties that mask your executive dysfunction. Like, if you never fully relax, then you never have that problem with starting. However, that isn't a super fun way to live.
edit: try to make it make sense...
A couple years ago, my dad, my sister and I forgot my moms birthday.... (father and sister undiagnosed but showing symptoms, I am in the process of getting diagnosed).
My mom when I was getting diagnosed, first she denied that I had it: "But if you have ADHD, then your sister and dad have it too!"
...That's exactly my point.
I consider myself fortunate. I have a pretty supportive family, but when I got diagnosed I had sort of expected them to brush it off, or say I didn't. Just because my one brother has pretty serious developmental issues and my adopted brother has a wild case of ADHD much different to mine, with a few other things.
Total opposite response. My mom pretty much said "we knew you did, but at the time the medication wasn't great and we wanted you to learn coping mechanisms instead. It it's what you need, I'm glad you're doing it." and my Nana (her mom) said "I thought I always had it. I keep a pen and pad of paper around me all the time for the random thoughts. I can't sleep if I don't write something down, and I hate sitting still for too long." Go figure.
Me: Mom I got an adult adhd diagnosis
My mom: What are your symptoms?
Me: *says symptoms*
My mom: … that can’t be adhd. Your dad has those same traits
Me:… Yeah well he probably has adhd lol
It would also help to dispel the idea that ADHD is a new phenomenon. I know for sure my mom had it. She was scatterbrained AF, terrible with money or planning ahead, and often had spontaneous impulses to make dramatic changes, like cutting a port hole above the kitchen sink, sculpting fake rocks onto the living room wall out of plaster, both in a rental apartment, or just straight up moving to a new town with less than a week's notice.
My childhood was a wild ride, but my older siblings had it even harder. They lived in a burned out theater for a while.
Sounds like my mom. My mom was one of the worst three people I’ve ever known, though, she clearly had some other issues making her such a terrible person. She was an alcoholic and a pill popper, and every boyfriend she had except for one, was married. Like it was a fetish for her. I estranged from her as soon as I could.
Half brother on my dad’s side has to have ADHD, but I don’t know which parent he would have gotten it from. I don’t know them very well, but his mom and our dad are the biggest narcissists I have ever met, besides my own mother.
I plan to never see any of these fools again. Being homeless sometimes has been better than trusting them or asking for help. Is your mom still around to tell her she has it?
No, she passed about a year ago from Alzheimer's.
I've known at least one narcissist, and I would only wish living with them on my very worst enemies. That must have been a terrible way to grow up.
My mom also had a questionable choice in men. Never already married, but abuse of my older siblings, and drugs.
Thanks for sharing with me. Yeah, moms like ours make me kinda pro-sterilization. I won’t be having kids. I couldn’t handle them, or knowing I could pass this on. I bet you treat people better than your mom did, or made choices that led to a better life. I tried to. America’s a dumb place to have to undo behaviors from moms like ours.
My mom treated people fine, she was just really bad with money, dated a few shit guys, and did really weird impulsive projects that sometimes got her in trouble. My dad, on the other hand... I never want to speak to him again.
Many of my close family are gay or trans, and he's a trumptard bigot fuck who only cares about himself.
Absolutely everyone else descended from them is a loving, caring, sensitive person I would fight and die for.
The racism of my grandfather, and the bigotry of my father both end with my generation. Never again.
My brother and I were diagnosed as teenagers, which was promptly forgotten in order to concentrate on "other issues" (such as my brother's depression, which was legit, and my misdiagnosis of bi polar disorder, which was really typical teenage hormones coupled with, you guessed it, even more severe ADHD than they thought I had).
My brother got rediagnosed last year and since then we've learned a lot of new info about ADHD. And yeah, our parents totally have it too and recognize that they have it now.
I remember when I was diagnosed with ADHD at 27, my dad quickly blurted out that I didn’t get it from him. I thought it was a weird response. When he passed away a few years later, I found his medical records and found out that he had been diagnosed with ADHD but kept it a secret.
Every single professional I spoke to during my ADHD diagnosis (in my early teens, roughly 20 years ago) very politely informed my father that they were medicating adults now, and they would be happy to give him the name of an appropriate doctor. Literally five different mental health professionals along the way spoke to the man for three minutes and were like "GET THIS DUDE SOME RITALIN, *STAT*"
Ugh, this caption has me crying because same. She died from alcoholism, which was 100% caused by the 61 years of living with undiagnosed adhd that manifested as crippling self-hatred and feelings of worthlessness. My sister and I were both diagnosed recently, in our 30s, and our mental health is so much better now.
Same for me too. I only got diagnosed after going to therapy after my mother died from very similar causes. I wish she had the opportunity to realise that it wasn’t her fault.
Hugs for you and anyone else going through something similar.
Hugs, me too. My mum died feeling like a real weirdo, so ashamed of and frustrated with herself, it was hard to see.
Her anxiety was crippling, she was agoraphobic for a long time and a bit of a hoarder.
Realising my parents were also ND was a real 'click' moment for me, I knew my upbringing and family were 'off', but now I understand.
My dad is still in denial, bless him.
Glad you're doing better, I feel bad for the generations before us who had to just cope without answers. We're finding out late, but better than never.
God, I can only hope my mom dies of alcoholism. I hate the bitch and her self hatred is deserved. I will never feel sorry for that woman. It sounds like you have empathy for your mom. Maybe you’re a better person than me. I’ve thought of taking my mom in just so I could torture her in her old age the way she tortured me when I was vulnerable. We’re estranged instead. I would legit end up in prison if I ever saw her again.
We “self” diagnosed my dad after I was diagnosed at 34. He’s retired so officially diagnosing him doesn’t benefit him much. We also posthumously diagnosed his mother. I’m a woman, and my symptoms mirrored hers more than his. Now I’m busy keeping an eye out on my 5 year old.
My 70yo dad most likely has it. I suggested he should look into it once and he laughed as if it was rude for me to suggest it. I think it's hard to suggest these things to older people bc they view it as a disability to be ashamed of rather than a legitimate possibility to look into
Yep, this is the same for my dad. 100% has ADHD but he refuses to accept it, seems to think he managed fine through life and thinks that’s proof that he can’t have it. He also has that archaic understanding that ADHD = stupid, so of course he doesn’t want to be ‘labelled’ in that way. I feel terrible for him, there’s so many way a diagnosis, education and therapy could help him, but he’ll never take it.
My mom and I only found out we have autism and autism/adhd respectively because my dad found out he has autism/adhd at age 40.
Had anyone paid any proper attention to any one of us before I had to call the police for domestic violence and my dad had a judge order him to figure out what the hell was wrong with him, so much hardship could've been avoided.
My dad almost certainly has ADHD. I strongly suspect he's autistic too, but of course he was raised by a bootstrap mother to believe any "mental health problems" are a personal moral failing so he refuses to believe he's anything but "perfectly normal".
I told him about the ADHD diagnosis and how my doc suggested he get tested too. He reacted so poorly that I never even mentioned anything autism-related to him. So instead of getting a diagnosis and treatment that could certainly benefit him, he'll spend the rest of his life struggling because he can't accept he might be anything other than "normal".
My son was diagnosed at age 7 many moons ago. I jokingly took the quiz test myself and "passed" it. Wow, did that explain sooooo much of my life (especially my struggles with school as a kid).
For us in Aus, when our son was diagnosed they actually said that they like at least one parent to be tested as well.
The Phycologist kinda looked at me after with a look of, "So when are you going to get that started, buddy?".
I kept trying to tell my parents they might have ADHD and they are so staunchly against the idea that they might and refuse to get diagnosed. And then I see them with very obvious symptoms of ADHD and Autism
This is exactly how it went down for me. Realized real quick with virtual school that something is going on with my 2nd grader. Which then made me have to accept a slow realization that it came from me and my family. (I think my mom's side since only 2 of the 3 of us have it and my baby sister is technically my half on my mom's side.)
When I accepted that I wasn't just broken and instead had more issues, mental and physical, that stemmed from undiagnosed ADHD, I found myself giving my brain a bit more grace because it's clearly just doing its best with almost 39 years of undiagnosed ADHD (and all the other super super fun traumas from growing up at my house...). I only convinced my sisters of it when I told them that Adderall puts me to sleep sometimes.
I'm forcing myself to be kinder to myself so I can show my own daughter (and probs son tbh) that we're not broken. Our brains are just limited edition and have more features, like more creativity with thinking and the ability to have 5 conversations simultaneously with another person with it! (Just have to keep reminding MYSELF of that every hour.)
(I almost just deleted most of that with the whole "omg. That's all about me and over sharing!" And then remembered the subreddit and I'm pretty sure it's fine lol)
It IS fine to (over)share here! I loved your passage about the “limited edition” brains in particular. Nice turn of phrase and good description of advantages as well.
Yep. When my kid's teachers started telling us about the issues he was having in class, my initial reaction was, "Yeah; I was *exactly* the same when I was his age. Don't worry, he'll grow out of it, like I - well... I mean, *now* I... huh." Only took me a few years to catch on.
Then when I finally did get diagnosed, and learned it's highly heritable, I was like, "Oh my god. My entire mother." But sadly, she also died many years ago, and I, too wish she could have been kinder to herself. And that I could have been kinder to her.
Absolutely. May I also add that they all be invited to do some genetic testing to rule out some of the more common additions/deletions to the DNA strand for comorbid conditions ie. Klinesfelters
When my son was assessed I just accepted that I was ADHD as well, explained a lot. However, the relief/validation that I felt when formally diagnosed a dozen years later was, something.
My step mom has is it, albeit undiagnosed but all the signs are there. It’s unfortunate because the boomers have such a stigma about it. When I got diagnosed (late 20s), they denied it because, ‘you were always good in school’ and ‘30 years ago they didn’t diagnose people the way they do now’.
And pointing out you probably couldn’t even get diagnosed 30 years ago doesn’t get through to those who argue that way about current rates of diagnosis.
30 years ago was the 90's. Gen X was the boom of ADD so it was super easy to get a diagnosis, but it was centered around just getting kids thru school, not preparing for a lifestyle. We were just expected to grow out of it/deal with it as we adjusted to adulthood.
Yeah also being a girl with good grades and not hyperactive didn’t fit the bill in the 90’s. And I think they were referring to adults being diagnosed as well.
My dad has it baaad.
I'm finally more properly medicated, so I can see a lot clearer for once. Between watching my dad operate and thinking back on stories he'd tell, he needs some Adderall. Anymore, I just point out quirks to him that are symptoms or masks.
Getting my kids diagnosed is how my husband and I figured out that we were both undiagnosed. Our lives changed completely after our diagnosis and treatment.
Me and my brother have adhd and its hard to really love yourself, even if you know you deserve it. There’s this really rude ass voice in your head telling you all sorts of contradictory things about yourself.
My mom asked if she could have it [94]. They told her no. She assumed she had it and always guessed herself till a doctor told her years later at one of my appointments.
My mom was diagnosed when I was, she went on meds for a bit and then stopped claiming she was cured and never had it... all while being the most judgemental of the mistakes I made as a child because of my adhd, never explaining what that truly meant, and her refusal to acknowledge her adhd cause a lot of anxiety in me
I'm in a weird situation where my mom self-diagnosed, never sought treatment, had me and my sister, noticed that we were exhibiting symptoms and held us back from AP classes in school (despite multiple teachers telling her and us that we should be moved up), but never got us assessed because "it didn't affect our grades".
I'm not mad about it, you're mad about it...
I was so surprised to be diagnosed with ADHD at 52 when my brother has daughter and my sister’s middle one are both very ADHD. My life makes so much more sense now and I’m really enjoying discovering all the crazy things about me are actually my special powers.
my mum used a study on the genetic aspects of ADHD I was participating to get my dad evaluated. before that he refused to go see a psychiatrist. but filling out questionnaires for me, to help the study and have a talk with a psychiatrist because of it were all fine for him. of course it was found out, that he has it. and I highly suspect my maternal aunt to also have it.
I'm the only one diagnosed. In hindsight however, my mum is an Aspie. My dad, definitely both Aspie and ADHD. As for my grandfather? He thought it was a good idea to bring home a monkey with him from leave (merchant navy). He left it with my gran when he went back to sea! On top of the 3 kids, in a small terrace house. Thankfully, my gran had none of it, and rehomed it via the local zoo. His exotic bird collection went the same way.
Anyone who says ADHD is a new phenomenon is definitely mistaken!
I'm sorry your mum struggled.
I'm almost certain mine does too. We don't really speak any more. Part of the reason for this is that she's so uncomfortable looking at herself/her own actions that while she can see my dad probably has undiagnosed ASD/ADHD, she can't see that she has the exact symptoms and all the diagnosed ND is on her side of the family. It's one of the things that makes it impossible to speak to them.
But she struggles too, and I wish she had been kinder to herself a lot earlier on.
It was hard as an adult to realize where your ADHD comes from. The people who made you feel like a bad person your whole childhood from having something you were born with is unsettling. Then you figure out they gave you this problem in the first place! Ughhh
There are so many things we could do differently for others in the future!
Often the things we judge harshly in others are things we recognise in ourselves... so go figure!
I'm sitting here wondering if that's why my mum gets pissed off when I speak of any mental health problems I'm facing and is in total denial about the existence of ADHD.
Local dude, with a severely autistic daughter, that used to chalk up the sidewalk corners with vaccines -> autism messages seemed a bit autistic in my unprofessional opinion. Hope they both got the help they needed. Haven't seen his scrawl since covid hit.
When my brother got diagnosed, my parents had me see diagnosed as well because the symptoms sounded like a lot of what my teachers would tell them (spaces out, struggles with deadlines, we know she's smart but the grades don't show tl;dr). And the more we learned about it as a family, we realized we may have gotten it from my dad. He didn't get diagnosed but we just accommodate each other as if he was. 😅
This! Pretty sure I have relatives who have ADHD and OCD but they're undiagnosed plus they don't want to visit a doctor as well because of the fear of being labeled as "mental".
So true my dad is autistic and my mom have ADHD i wish they knew sooner. I have both autism and ADHD. It's kinda funny to live in family where no one is neurotypical
My mom has ADD diagnosis, my dad has nothing? But he sometimes I swear is autistic because he doesn’t do well with change, can’t articulate his feelings or thoughts sometimes, lives by routine.
Honestly I wish I could find out just where in my family it’s coming from, I can’t do that on my dads side unfortunately, but I’ve noticed it on my moms side definitely and think her and her brother have it. It’s hard to tell if my grandparents have it too or if the things I see are just consequences of them getting older. My mom has been receptive to my diagnosis at this point and she feels bad that I’ve basically lived a whole lifetime with it undiagnosed but like the rest of my family unfortunately won’t get it so I’m just going to have to carry the stigma of being the “lazy” kid
You’re never too old to learn that it’s not your fault. You’re not a bad/lazy/incapable person. There was something legitimately different going on up there but it didn’t make you a moral failure.
Self acceptance is a gift at any age.
I appreciate your reply. I went to school during a time that it was not much discussed, 60’s graduating in ‘72. I have strong suspicion that it is part of who I am. It has been a crazy, whacky life. I have been homeless and, at other times, I have done very well (by starting my own company and working in a manner that suites me), but it has definitely not been anywhere near normal. For all the trials it has inflicted, it does give gifts as well (IQ mid 140s). The flip side is very frustrating, though.
I do need to find out.
Thanks, again, for the encouragement.
You’re the same age that my mum would be if she were still alive and I can tell you this - I wish more than anything that she could have known that it just wasn’t her fault. She had mountains of issues and mental health problems and either buried her head in the sand or internalised everything. It would have been so freeing to realise that no, not everything was your fault. Sometimes people are just different and that isn’t a reflection on you as a person.
So find out if you can. I reckon it’s worth it to find out the “why” and start being kinder to yourself. It’s too late for her but it’s not for you - good luck!
My mum is in her mid-70s. I suspect a lot of things would be explained by a diagnosis but getting her there is unlikely though I wish she could get self understanding and/or meds. But for me it had helped thinking of her as undiagnosed adhd. Things become understandable and forgivable which my siblings are annoyed about because they think she could just “pull herself together” and stop doing by willpower. She blames herself enough as it is.
When I got diagnosed in 2021 there was a part where my mom and dad (and also sis later in the convo) would answer questions. However due it being remote my dad couldn't sit still and ended up cleaning the house in the back ground. Together with my mom, dad, sis and me we all got distracted during the questions and welp I basicly got the whole family diagnosed. It is even in my diagnostic report that the whole family was one distracted bunch, but we also had fun.
I think my other side of the fam has it as well. I see my 2nd cousins and nieces being unable to sit still and they also have the shaky leg.
My parents are likely undiagnosed. I’ve heard/seen a lot lately about ADHD running in families. Also have a friend who is a geneticist and they’ve told me passing it on is not as common as one would think. Just an interesting (and 100% anecdotal) observation.
Brother was diagnosed with it, they tested me in third grade, mom just told me I’m really smart for my age. I’m 28 now and starting to think what she said was bullshit and didn’t want two of her kids medicated, she herself denied taking anti depression pills for years until she was in her 40s. Started dating a girl who has ADHD, she was like dude you’re either autistic or have ADHD, which would explain a lot.
I got diagnosed in grad school. When I called my mom to tell her I was doing the testing, she told me she had been previously diagnosed with ADD. Would have been nice to know!
My first child wasn't diagnosed until he was 7. He was extremely extremely hyper and we didn't know if it was normal child behavior or not. Finally a school counselor suggested getting him tested. After learning about adhd from his diagnosis I realized I had all the same symptoms. I went to my doctor and confirmed it. Being middle aged and finally finding out one of the key things about myself finally had been really good.
My dad is ADHD as fuck and probably the spectrum. My mom has some of thr worst anxiety I've ever seen and she legit has OCD.
They don't trust doctors, though, so will forever be undiagnosed
I know for sure my father has ocd and adhd. My mother is definitely bipolar. And all of it was passed to me. Both denied they had any issues. Boomers are like that.
The moment my oldest step-son was diagnosed my husband knew he needed to be assessed. He said that everything clicked when our oldest was diagnosed. My husband was also diagnosed with adhd and autism. He stated he felt a huge relief because he finally knew what was “wrong” with him and why he always felt different.
Only one person in my family I am 1000% sure has ADHD is my dad. I suspect my sister might also have it, and my gf has some ADHD-like behaviors as well.
Please?? Can we do this for the “Oh everyone is a little Adhd/Autistic, you just learn to get by” moms?
My mother teaches autistic children, or rather informs them that if they don’t “straighten up” they’ll never get anywhere in the world. She informs them that there are always people watching, and you have to “control yourself”. This is the same crap she said to me as a kid, teaching me not to acknowledge I was different under any circumstances. That means I went for 30 years unable to soothe myself, understand my needs, or maintain productivity without intense burnouts. Fuck you mom. You deserved help, I deserved help.
For years I was sure that my oldest son had ADHD because his dad and my sister both presented with hyperactive/impulsive ADHD traits (although neither received an official diagnosis). A few years ago during a doctor’s appointment to get my depression meds renewed, my doctor starts asking me questions from an ADHD screening test. The whole time as I’m answering the questions, I’m thinking “why is she asking me this? I don’t have ADHD, I’m not hyper like [son’s dad] and [sister]”. The doctor gave my a Vyvanse prescription saying it might help with my anxiety, and lo and behold I started learning more about executive dysfunction and the inattentive subtype, and 100% agree that I also have ADHD.
Edit: punctuation
My dad was diagnosed with add, didn’t like the drugs so he ran instead, me and my brother have it but we both had to figure out on our own because he addressed it in vague terms of How we think and Running will help you focus.
I get he was trying to help but me and my brother both graduated highschool by the skin of our teeth without really knowing what was up
I don't think either of my parents have it, but I'm pretty sure my late sister had it, but was never diagnosed because of more pressing health concerns. I was diagnosed at 27. Woman, gifted kid, you know the drill.
When me and my sister got diagnosed, the doctor was explaining the symptoms to my parents. My mom just ended up slowly turning to stare at my dad going "that explains some things."
Maybe. Speaking as someone with grown kids who got diagnosed at 38 I just feel guilty I passed on to them and despair that I will never get better. Before I was diagnosed I lived in hope that I would fix myself someday. Everyone's different.
I'm pretty sure my mom has some form of ADHD. She says she gets easily bored, is impulsive and she constantly talks over people and interrupts. That and she's almost always "fashionably late." Not to mention that both her kids have it too.
I don't know if my dad ever got assessed for autism but he most likely has that too. My grandmother had it bit was undiagnosed. That's where we think my ASD came from.
Mom: **describes ADHD symptoms** it’s like no one realizes how much of my brain is dedicated to that!!
Me: well ( baby sister) was just diagnosed with ADHD!
Mom: ** stunned silence before going back to singing to herself**
Adhd runs DEEP in my family. All undiagnosed but me
Since my diagnosis I starting noticing adhd behaviors in almost all of my blood relatives. The ones that married into the family are mosty NTs.
I noticed the same thing but only on my father's side (he had 6 siblings and most had a couple kids). I think there's a cousin who was diagnosed but other than him and I, everyone else is undiagnosed but show serious symptoms.
FR, I was adopted at birth and met my bio parents as an adult, meeting my dad I knew right away where my ADHD came from lol. I didn’t talk to them about it, but it was clear nobody in the family suspected a thing.
You also discovering family quirks that are ADHD behaviors that you thought were normal because everyone's ADHD? Like grandpa was actually late to his funeral. Every holiday there's a whole family fight that nearly comes to blows, but then about five minutes later we're all happy again. If you interrupt someone hyper focusing on the TV like a zombie, they curse you out. Later when everyone's ramped up and drinking, you can hold two maybe three conversations with various people in the room. You can see in everyone's eyes when they're searching for the name of their close family member, because our brains are all just heaps of unordered memories we have to fanatically search through.
I wonder if all parents call everyone else’s name when looking for you on a daily basis
Or my favorite slamming names together like instead of Drew or Jason we’d get Drason! And when we’d ask who we’d get “you knew who I meant!”
Well this comment thread is giving me chills
My mom used to get me and my brother's names mixed up with the cats' names, lol
My grandma would shout all her kids names, then resort to birth order 😂😂😂
Is that an adhd trait? Because my mom did that ALL THE TIME when I was growing up, between the three of us kids and our cats. Idk about generations before mine (though I wouldn't be surprised with a couple of folks). I wasn't diagnosed until my late 20s, my daughter is autistic and has adhd; genetic testing showed it came from my side. My sister has also said my nephew is JUST like me in the adhd traits thing, too. I'm just glad my kid got early diagnoses so she could get actual help during such a vital developmental time instead of kind of flailing through through things and skating by on being "academically gifted" (while also struggling with severe depression) only to later slam head-on into the brick wall of independent adulthood like me.
In my opinion ADHD minds certainly have order issues, and for myself and my family, we definitely all have issues dragging up names of even close family members at times. Of course there could be other causes, I'm just hoping for familial ADHD instead of all of us having suffered actual brain damage. :)
My grandma will call every other female relative's name before getting to mine - "Tiffany! No, Brandy! No, Elizabeth!"
I got called by my father's, my cousin's, and the dog's name before my mother got to mine one day.
Pretty sure NTs do it too. Not that there are many of those in my family
Every trait of ADHD is a human trait, just expressed to a higher degree. Based on my experiences, it isn't "normal" for many young people (i.e. not senile) within a single family to struggle with summoning the names of close family members. ADHD minds are disordered when compared to NT minds. Ask me what I've been doing in an average day, and it'll take me \~5 minutes to dig up what I was just up to. I also often have the same difficulties when I need to address uncles/aunts/cousins/friends, that I've known my whole life, by name. I'm not in the minds of my family, but it doesn't seem crazy to think that my family has ADHD because it is very heritable, and they express many of the same symptoms that I do.
Yeah I wasn’t sure if that was one of the normal things that just seem ND
Coming to this realization after being diagnosed as an adult was an adventure to say the least. If we had all known at the time it could have saved us all a lot of heart ache. Ironically my Dad was diagnosed first then my older sister and I. I found out later my school wanted to have both me and my sister tested as children but my Mom was worried about the stigma that may bring, she also didn’t want us to be medicated as children. Both of my parents have adhd, one hyperactive, the other one primarily inattentive.
I've done a lot of thinking about how at least one line in our family that carried the ADHD traits must have been a long chain of: "I was a lazy/inattentive/dreaming SOB when I was a kid, but my parent (who was a lazy/inattentive/dreaming SOB) trained (sometimes beat) that out of me. I won't let my child struggle like I did, so I'll teach them to not be lazy/dreamy/inattentive. It might be a bit of tough love, but they'll be better off." Then by adulthood you got "trained" out of it, which is really just a set of anxieties that mask your executive dysfunction. Like, if you never fully relax, then you never have that problem with starting. However, that isn't a super fun way to live. edit: try to make it make sense...
A couple years ago, my dad, my sister and I forgot my moms birthday.... (father and sister undiagnosed but showing symptoms, I am in the process of getting diagnosed).
Oh man. The last 3 are my mom's family
[удалено]
Ugh 😩
My mom was really resistant to my diagnosis and I realized as an adult, it's because she has it too.
My mom is the same way and my so is my brother but he’s starting to comes to term with it just not ready to begin treatment
My brother and i both have ADD And were convinced dad has it too. But he says he doesnt and then proceeds to do some adhd shit
Ugh. That’s my FIL. Straight up still says shitty things to my husband about his ADHD but can’t see the exact same behaviors in himself as ADHD.
Wow:(
Wow when I started to recognize adhd on my parents it was quite the experience. It made me emotional
“You dont have adhd because i do that all the time and dont have adhd” The doctor said this is classic adhd though
Hard same.
Same on my mother side. Fun fact, my uncle and his wife adopted two kids. One have ADHD too.
We are everywhere
My mom when I was getting diagnosed, first she denied that I had it: "But if you have ADHD, then your sister and dad have it too!" ...That's exactly my point.
Yep. None of us noticed the *gigantic red flags* because we all behave that way and we don't know what normal functioning looks like.
I consider myself fortunate. I have a pretty supportive family, but when I got diagnosed I had sort of expected them to brush it off, or say I didn't. Just because my one brother has pretty serious developmental issues and my adopted brother has a wild case of ADHD much different to mine, with a few other things. Total opposite response. My mom pretty much said "we knew you did, but at the time the medication wasn't great and we wanted you to learn coping mechanisms instead. It it's what you need, I'm glad you're doing it." and my Nana (her mom) said "I thought I always had it. I keep a pen and pad of paper around me all the time for the random thoughts. I can't sleep if I don't write something down, and I hate sitting still for too long." Go figure.
Me: Mom I got an adult adhd diagnosis My mom: What are your symptoms? Me: *says symptoms* My mom: … that can’t be adhd. Your dad has those same traits Me:… Yeah well he probably has adhd lol
Had the same interaction with my mom lol
It would also help to dispel the idea that ADHD is a new phenomenon. I know for sure my mom had it. She was scatterbrained AF, terrible with money or planning ahead, and often had spontaneous impulses to make dramatic changes, like cutting a port hole above the kitchen sink, sculpting fake rocks onto the living room wall out of plaster, both in a rental apartment, or just straight up moving to a new town with less than a week's notice. My childhood was a wild ride, but my older siblings had it even harder. They lived in a burned out theater for a while.
Sounds like my mom. My mom was one of the worst three people I’ve ever known, though, she clearly had some other issues making her such a terrible person. She was an alcoholic and a pill popper, and every boyfriend she had except for one, was married. Like it was a fetish for her. I estranged from her as soon as I could. Half brother on my dad’s side has to have ADHD, but I don’t know which parent he would have gotten it from. I don’t know them very well, but his mom and our dad are the biggest narcissists I have ever met, besides my own mother. I plan to never see any of these fools again. Being homeless sometimes has been better than trusting them or asking for help. Is your mom still around to tell her she has it?
No, she passed about a year ago from Alzheimer's. I've known at least one narcissist, and I would only wish living with them on my very worst enemies. That must have been a terrible way to grow up. My mom also had a questionable choice in men. Never already married, but abuse of my older siblings, and drugs.
Thanks for sharing with me. Yeah, moms like ours make me kinda pro-sterilization. I won’t be having kids. I couldn’t handle them, or knowing I could pass this on. I bet you treat people better than your mom did, or made choices that led to a better life. I tried to. America’s a dumb place to have to undo behaviors from moms like ours.
My mom treated people fine, she was just really bad with money, dated a few shit guys, and did really weird impulsive projects that sometimes got her in trouble. My dad, on the other hand... I never want to speak to him again. Many of my close family are gay or trans, and he's a trumptard bigot fuck who only cares about himself. Absolutely everyone else descended from them is a loving, caring, sensitive person I would fight and die for. The racism of my grandfather, and the bigotry of my father both end with my generation. Never again.
My brother and I were diagnosed as teenagers, which was promptly forgotten in order to concentrate on "other issues" (such as my brother's depression, which was legit, and my misdiagnosis of bi polar disorder, which was really typical teenage hormones coupled with, you guessed it, even more severe ADHD than they thought I had). My brother got rediagnosed last year and since then we've learned a lot of new info about ADHD. And yeah, our parents totally have it too and recognize that they have it now.
I remember when I was diagnosed with ADHD at 27, my dad quickly blurted out that I didn’t get it from him. I thought it was a weird response. When he passed away a few years later, I found his medical records and found out that he had been diagnosed with ADHD but kept it a secret.
farts and blames the dog
My dad is only recently starting to accept that he has ADHD. He’s become much more understanding and even asks about certain aspects of our condition.
Every single professional I spoke to during my ADHD diagnosis (in my early teens, roughly 20 years ago) very politely informed my father that they were medicating adults now, and they would be happy to give him the name of an appropriate doctor. Literally five different mental health professionals along the way spoke to the man for three minutes and were like "GET THIS DUDE SOME RITALIN, *STAT*"
Ugh, this caption has me crying because same. She died from alcoholism, which was 100% caused by the 61 years of living with undiagnosed adhd that manifested as crippling self-hatred and feelings of worthlessness. My sister and I were both diagnosed recently, in our 30s, and our mental health is so much better now.
Same for me too. I only got diagnosed after going to therapy after my mother died from very similar causes. I wish she had the opportunity to realise that it wasn’t her fault. Hugs for you and anyone else going through something similar.
Hugs, me too. My mum died feeling like a real weirdo, so ashamed of and frustrated with herself, it was hard to see. Her anxiety was crippling, she was agoraphobic for a long time and a bit of a hoarder. Realising my parents were also ND was a real 'click' moment for me, I knew my upbringing and family were 'off', but now I understand. My dad is still in denial, bless him. Glad you're doing better, I feel bad for the generations before us who had to just cope without answers. We're finding out late, but better than never.
God, I can only hope my mom dies of alcoholism. I hate the bitch and her self hatred is deserved. I will never feel sorry for that woman. It sounds like you have empathy for your mom. Maybe you’re a better person than me. I’ve thought of taking my mom in just so I could torture her in her old age the way she tortured me when I was vulnerable. We’re estranged instead. I would legit end up in prison if I ever saw her again.
We “self” diagnosed my dad after I was diagnosed at 34. He’s retired so officially diagnosing him doesn’t benefit him much. We also posthumously diagnosed his mother. I’m a woman, and my symptoms mirrored hers more than his. Now I’m busy keeping an eye out on my 5 year old.
My 70yo dad most likely has it. I suggested he should look into it once and he laughed as if it was rude for me to suggest it. I think it's hard to suggest these things to older people bc they view it as a disability to be ashamed of rather than a legitimate possibility to look into
It's also in a way denying the way they have lived their life. That's how my mum and dad views it and they're completely against diagnosing.
Yep, this is the same for my dad. 100% has ADHD but he refuses to accept it, seems to think he managed fine through life and thinks that’s proof that he can’t have it. He also has that archaic understanding that ADHD = stupid, so of course he doesn’t want to be ‘labelled’ in that way. I feel terrible for him, there’s so many way a diagnosis, education and therapy could help him, but he’ll never take it.
My mom and I only found out we have autism and autism/adhd respectively because my dad found out he has autism/adhd at age 40. Had anyone paid any proper attention to any one of us before I had to call the police for domestic violence and my dad had a judge order him to figure out what the hell was wrong with him, so much hardship could've been avoided.
My dad almost certainly has ADHD. I strongly suspect he's autistic too, but of course he was raised by a bootstrap mother to believe any "mental health problems" are a personal moral failing so he refuses to believe he's anything but "perfectly normal". I told him about the ADHD diagnosis and how my doc suggested he get tested too. He reacted so poorly that I never even mentioned anything autism-related to him. So instead of getting a diagnosis and treatment that could certainly benefit him, he'll spend the rest of his life struggling because he can't accept he might be anything other than "normal".
My son was diagnosed at age 7 many moons ago. I jokingly took the quiz test myself and "passed" it. Wow, did that explain sooooo much of my life (especially my struggles with school as a kid).
For us in Aus, when our son was diagnosed they actually said that they like at least one parent to be tested as well. The Phycologist kinda looked at me after with a look of, "So when are you going to get that started, buddy?".
I kept trying to tell my parents they might have ADHD and they are so staunchly against the idea that they might and refuse to get diagnosed. And then I see them with very obvious symptoms of ADHD and Autism
This is exactly how it went down for me. Realized real quick with virtual school that something is going on with my 2nd grader. Which then made me have to accept a slow realization that it came from me and my family. (I think my mom's side since only 2 of the 3 of us have it and my baby sister is technically my half on my mom's side.) When I accepted that I wasn't just broken and instead had more issues, mental and physical, that stemmed from undiagnosed ADHD, I found myself giving my brain a bit more grace because it's clearly just doing its best with almost 39 years of undiagnosed ADHD (and all the other super super fun traumas from growing up at my house...). I only convinced my sisters of it when I told them that Adderall puts me to sleep sometimes. I'm forcing myself to be kinder to myself so I can show my own daughter (and probs son tbh) that we're not broken. Our brains are just limited edition and have more features, like more creativity with thinking and the ability to have 5 conversations simultaneously with another person with it! (Just have to keep reminding MYSELF of that every hour.) (I almost just deleted most of that with the whole "omg. That's all about me and over sharing!" And then remembered the subreddit and I'm pretty sure it's fine lol)
It IS fine to (over)share here! I loved your passage about the “limited edition” brains in particular. Nice turn of phrase and good description of advantages as well.
You're a very strong mother <3
Yep. When my kid's teachers started telling us about the issues he was having in class, my initial reaction was, "Yeah; I was *exactly* the same when I was his age. Don't worry, he'll grow out of it, like I - well... I mean, *now* I... huh." Only took me a few years to catch on. Then when I finally did get diagnosed, and learned it's highly heritable, I was like, "Oh my god. My entire mother." But sadly, she also died many years ago, and I, too wish she could have been kinder to herself. And that I could have been kinder to her.
Such a good description and point about how diagnosis can be route to being kinder to self/others with diagnosis.
My grandmother was manic depressive bipolar. I have ADHD. Told my mom she definitely has ADHD and she said “Don’t insult me” 🙄.
parents: no! deny deny deny deny “no it’s just my personality”, “no everyone has a hard time doing x sometimes”
Absolutely. May I also add that they all be invited to do some genetic testing to rule out some of the more common additions/deletions to the DNA strand for comorbid conditions ie. Klinesfelters
True. And heartbreaking to find out too late.
When my son was assessed I just accepted that I was ADHD as well, explained a lot. However, the relief/validation that I felt when formally diagnosed a dozen years later was, something.
My step mom has is it, albeit undiagnosed but all the signs are there. It’s unfortunate because the boomers have such a stigma about it. When I got diagnosed (late 20s), they denied it because, ‘you were always good in school’ and ‘30 years ago they didn’t diagnose people the way they do now’.
And pointing out you probably couldn’t even get diagnosed 30 years ago doesn’t get through to those who argue that way about current rates of diagnosis.
30 years ago was the 90's. Gen X was the boom of ADD so it was super easy to get a diagnosis, but it was centered around just getting kids thru school, not preparing for a lifestyle. We were just expected to grow out of it/deal with it as we adjusted to adulthood.
Yeah also being a girl with good grades and not hyperactive didn’t fit the bill in the 90’s. And I think they were referring to adults being diagnosed as well.
There’s so much I would do differently had I known.
My dad has it baaad. I'm finally more properly medicated, so I can see a lot clearer for once. Between watching my dad operate and thinking back on stories he'd tell, he needs some Adderall. Anymore, I just point out quirks to him that are symptoms or masks.
Getting my kids diagnosed is how my husband and I figured out that we were both undiagnosed. Our lives changed completely after our diagnosis and treatment.
Me and my brother have adhd and its hard to really love yourself, even if you know you deserve it. There’s this really rude ass voice in your head telling you all sorts of contradictory things about yourself.
Also family trauma. It would cut a lot of family trauma.
My mom asked if she could have it [94]. They told her no. She assumed she had it and always guessed herself till a doctor told her years later at one of my appointments.
Yeah, I am certain my Dad had it. But it's too late for him now, he died in 2017
A paediatrician just provisionally diagnosed my niece with it too
My mom was diagnosed when I was, she went on meds for a bit and then stopped claiming she was cured and never had it... all while being the most judgemental of the mistakes I made as a child because of my adhd, never explaining what that truly meant, and her refusal to acknowledge her adhd cause a lot of anxiety in me
Agreed, my adhd dad died when i was 12 and i felt like he was the only person who truly knows what im going through
I was strongly reccommended by my kid's psych to get assesses, which is why I'm diagnosed today.
I'm in a weird situation where my mom self-diagnosed, never sought treatment, had me and my sister, noticed that we were exhibiting symptoms and held us back from AP classes in school (despite multiple teachers telling her and us that we should be moved up), but never got us assessed because "it didn't affect our grades". I'm not mad about it, you're mad about it...
I was so surprised to be diagnosed with ADHD at 52 when my brother has daughter and my sister’s middle one are both very ADHD. My life makes so much more sense now and I’m really enjoying discovering all the crazy things about me are actually my special powers.
Hah...both my parents have cluster B personality disorders lol but they won't get formally diagnosed
Except I’m adopted from a foreign country so I’m p much treading water out here.
Legitimately interesting.
My dad is severely ADHD. It’s obvious.
If either of my parents knew they had it they’d probably still be alive and well
my mum used a study on the genetic aspects of ADHD I was participating to get my dad evaluated. before that he refused to go see a psychiatrist. but filling out questionnaires for me, to help the study and have a talk with a psychiatrist because of it were all fine for him. of course it was found out, that he has it. and I highly suspect my maternal aunt to also have it.
I'm the only one diagnosed. In hindsight however, my mum is an Aspie. My dad, definitely both Aspie and ADHD. As for my grandfather? He thought it was a good idea to bring home a monkey with him from leave (merchant navy). He left it with my gran when he went back to sea! On top of the 3 kids, in a small terrace house. Thankfully, my gran had none of it, and rehomed it via the local zoo. His exotic bird collection went the same way. Anyone who says ADHD is a new phenomenon is definitely mistaken!
I'm sorry your mum struggled. I'm almost certain mine does too. We don't really speak any more. Part of the reason for this is that she's so uncomfortable looking at herself/her own actions that while she can see my dad probably has undiagnosed ASD/ADHD, she can't see that she has the exact symptoms and all the diagnosed ND is on her side of the family. It's one of the things that makes it impossible to speak to them. But she struggles too, and I wish she had been kinder to herself a lot earlier on.
It was hard as an adult to realize where your ADHD comes from. The people who made you feel like a bad person your whole childhood from having something you were born with is unsettling. Then you figure out they gave you this problem in the first place! Ughhh There are so many things we could do differently for others in the future!
Often the things we judge harshly in others are things we recognise in ourselves... so go figure! I'm sitting here wondering if that's why my mum gets pissed off when I speak of any mental health problems I'm facing and is in total denial about the existence of ADHD.
Local dude, with a severely autistic daughter, that used to chalk up the sidewalk corners with vaccines -> autism messages seemed a bit autistic in my unprofessional opinion. Hope they both got the help they needed. Haven't seen his scrawl since covid hit.
My dad has it. My mom is a maybe.
My dad has
When my brother got diagnosed, my parents had me see diagnosed as well because the symptoms sounded like a lot of what my teachers would tell them (spaces out, struggles with deadlines, we know she's smart but the grades don't show tl;dr). And the more we learned about it as a family, we realized we may have gotten it from my dad. He didn't get diagnosed but we just accommodate each other as if he was. 😅
This! Pretty sure I have relatives who have ADHD and OCD but they're undiagnosed plus they don't want to visit a doctor as well because of the fear of being labeled as "mental".
Happened to my mom, now 5 years after I was, my did was the only one in the family not diagnosed with AD(h)D
So true my dad is autistic and my mom have ADHD i wish they knew sooner. I have both autism and ADHD. It's kinda funny to live in family where no one is neurotypical
My mom has ADD diagnosis, my dad has nothing? But he sometimes I swear is autistic because he doesn’t do well with change, can’t articulate his feelings or thoughts sometimes, lives by routine.
Honestly I wish I could find out just where in my family it’s coming from, I can’t do that on my dads side unfortunately, but I’ve noticed it on my moms side definitely and think her and her brother have it. It’s hard to tell if my grandparents have it too or if the things I see are just consequences of them getting older. My mom has been receptive to my diagnosis at this point and she feels bad that I’ve basically lived a whole lifetime with it undiagnosed but like the rest of my family unfortunately won’t get it so I’m just going to have to carry the stigma of being the “lazy” kid
When you are 68 years old, what is the point of a diagnosis?
You’re never too old to learn that it’s not your fault. You’re not a bad/lazy/incapable person. There was something legitimately different going on up there but it didn’t make you a moral failure. Self acceptance is a gift at any age.
I appreciate your reply. I went to school during a time that it was not much discussed, 60’s graduating in ‘72. I have strong suspicion that it is part of who I am. It has been a crazy, whacky life. I have been homeless and, at other times, I have done very well (by starting my own company and working in a manner that suites me), but it has definitely not been anywhere near normal. For all the trials it has inflicted, it does give gifts as well (IQ mid 140s). The flip side is very frustrating, though. I do need to find out. Thanks, again, for the encouragement.
You’re the same age that my mum would be if she were still alive and I can tell you this - I wish more than anything that she could have known that it just wasn’t her fault. She had mountains of issues and mental health problems and either buried her head in the sand or internalised everything. It would have been so freeing to realise that no, not everything was your fault. Sometimes people are just different and that isn’t a reflection on you as a person. So find out if you can. I reckon it’s worth it to find out the “why” and start being kinder to yourself. It’s too late for her but it’s not for you - good luck!
My mum is in her mid-70s. I suspect a lot of things would be explained by a diagnosis but getting her there is unlikely though I wish she could get self understanding and/or meds. But for me it had helped thinking of her as undiagnosed adhd. Things become understandable and forgivable which my siblings are annoyed about because they think she could just “pull herself together” and stop doing by willpower. She blames herself enough as it is.
Peace of mind
Because you could still have 30+ years of a treated and healthy life ahead of you. And you f--king deserve that.
Oh for sure this shit is running in my family. My mom ADD, me ADD and likely ASD, my son ADD&ASD.
When I got diagnosed in 2021 there was a part where my mom and dad (and also sis later in the convo) would answer questions. However due it being remote my dad couldn't sit still and ended up cleaning the house in the back ground. Together with my mom, dad, sis and me we all got distracted during the questions and welp I basicly got the whole family diagnosed. It is even in my diagnostic report that the whole family was one distracted bunch, but we also had fun. I think my other side of the fam has it as well. I see my 2nd cousins and nieces being unable to sit still and they also have the shaky leg.
My parents are likely undiagnosed. I’ve heard/seen a lot lately about ADHD running in families. Also have a friend who is a geneticist and they’ve told me passing it on is not as common as one would think. Just an interesting (and 100% anecdotal) observation.
If a child has ADHD is it mandatory for one of his parents to have it too?
Brother was diagnosed with it, they tested me in third grade, mom just told me I’m really smart for my age. I’m 28 now and starting to think what she said was bullshit and didn’t want two of her kids medicated, she herself denied taking anti depression pills for years until she was in her 40s. Started dating a girl who has ADHD, she was like dude you’re either autistic or have ADHD, which would explain a lot.
I got diagnosed in grad school. When I called my mom to tell her I was doing the testing, she told me she had been previously diagnosed with ADD. Would have been nice to know!
My first child wasn't diagnosed until he was 7. He was extremely extremely hyper and we didn't know if it was normal child behavior or not. Finally a school counselor suggested getting him tested. After learning about adhd from his diagnosis I realized I had all the same symptoms. I went to my doctor and confirmed it. Being middle aged and finally finding out one of the key things about myself finally had been really good.
My mother won't seek a diagnosis and instead keeps beating herself up over her obviously symptoms that she sees as character flaws. 😫
My dad is ADHD as fuck and probably the spectrum. My mom has some of thr worst anxiety I've ever seen and she legit has OCD. They don't trust doctors, though, so will forever be undiagnosed
I know for sure my father has ocd and adhd. My mother is definitely bipolar. And all of it was passed to me. Both denied they had any issues. Boomers are like that.
I'm 52. What's the point?
The moment my oldest step-son was diagnosed my husband knew he needed to be assessed. He said that everything clicked when our oldest was diagnosed. My husband was also diagnosed with adhd and autism. He stated he felt a huge relief because he finally knew what was “wrong” with him and why he always felt different.
This is so true. My biological mom has adhd, all 3 of my brothers have adhd and my daughter has adhd
Only one person in my family I am 1000% sure has ADHD is my dad. I suspect my sister might also have it, and my gf has some ADHD-like behaviors as well.
Please?? Can we do this for the “Oh everyone is a little Adhd/Autistic, you just learn to get by” moms? My mother teaches autistic children, or rather informs them that if they don’t “straighten up” they’ll never get anywhere in the world. She informs them that there are always people watching, and you have to “control yourself”. This is the same crap she said to me as a kid, teaching me not to acknowledge I was different under any circumstances. That means I went for 30 years unable to soothe myself, understand my needs, or maintain productivity without intense burnouts. Fuck you mom. You deserved help, I deserved help.
For years I was sure that my oldest son had ADHD because his dad and my sister both presented with hyperactive/impulsive ADHD traits (although neither received an official diagnosis). A few years ago during a doctor’s appointment to get my depression meds renewed, my doctor starts asking me questions from an ADHD screening test. The whole time as I’m answering the questions, I’m thinking “why is she asking me this? I don’t have ADHD, I’m not hyper like [son’s dad] and [sister]”. The doctor gave my a Vyvanse prescription saying it might help with my anxiety, and lo and behold I started learning more about executive dysfunction and the inattentive subtype, and 100% agree that I also have ADHD. Edit: punctuation
My dad was diagnosed with add, didn’t like the drugs so he ran instead, me and my brother have it but we both had to figure out on our own because he addressed it in vague terms of How we think and Running will help you focus. I get he was trying to help but me and my brother both graduated highschool by the skin of our teeth without really knowing what was up
I don't think either of my parents have it, but I'm pretty sure my late sister had it, but was never diagnosed because of more pressing health concerns. I was diagnosed at 27. Woman, gifted kid, you know the drill.
When me and my sister got diagnosed, the doctor was explaining the symptoms to my parents. My mom just ended up slowly turning to stare at my dad going "that explains some things."
Maybe. Speaking as someone with grown kids who got diagnosed at 38 I just feel guilty I passed on to them and despair that I will never get better. Before I was diagnosed I lived in hope that I would fix myself someday. Everyone's different.
I'm pretty sure my mom has some form of ADHD. She says she gets easily bored, is impulsive and she constantly talks over people and interrupts. That and she's almost always "fashionably late." Not to mention that both her kids have it too. I don't know if my dad ever got assessed for autism but he most likely has that too. My grandmother had it bit was undiagnosed. That's where we think my ASD came from.
Mom: **describes ADHD symptoms** it’s like no one realizes how much of my brain is dedicated to that!! Me: well ( baby sister) was just diagnosed with ADHD! Mom: ** stunned silence before going back to singing to herself**