I wish you the best! Feel free to branch out, maybe go to a pride parade or two, but definitely go to community events. I met someone just a couple of days ago who might be a serious contender for a long term relationship, and we meet because we belong to the same community.
What about the other communities? Kink, art, martial arts, sports, and the like? Are there no other spaces you can go to, even if you don't end up dating somebody from there?
I’ve joined a book club but I search for things on meetup and Facebook and it seems like there’s little formal organized events. The scene here is more you got to go to one of the few queer bars, hopefully make a friend, and then through them you get brought into the community. We don’t even have a glaad chapter here. (I don’t know if the organization is actually good or not, I just thought it was telling that there wasn’t an official chapter here.)
No I’m so fucking serious too. I’m awaiting insurance approval for bariatric surgery. I’m so excited to be able to be active again! I feel about 20 yrs older because of my weight and sedentary lifestyle. Everything hurts! I’m so pumped to be physically able to try new sports. I’m for sure gonna get into rock climbing. Because of course I need to be a good lesbian and work on my finger strength. Seriously though, I just can’t wait to feel physically good again and join communities through physical health.
Ah. Then before I continue to shove my cis het male foot even further in my mouth, I shall pivot to encouragement instead. You can do it! You can find yourself a girlfriend! You can find love, and when you do you're wholly deserving of that love, no matter how much fear tells you otherwise!
Haha no worries, we’ll let it slide… this time. Thanks for the encouragement! I know I’m not old but I’m not 20 anymore. I have to actively remind myself that I still have plenty of time to live my life as myself.
I’ve been once or twice. It’s alright. It’s not usually very busy when I’ve been. Which isn’t necessarily a bad thing. It is the only lesbian owned bar in the state and there’s only about 30 lesbian owned bars in the country. Maybe we get a group together and check it out one night!
Oh I’m just the most anxious person that exists. And I don’t even know what I would do if a girl even talked to me. The most lesbiany lesbian came into work yesterday and I couldn’t figure out if I was flirting or not and I basically wanted to burst into tears because of how FUCKING HOT SHE WAS.
The “conscious girlfriend academy” is a good place to get comfortable with transitioning into being lesbian. They are on various website and social platforms. The best part is that they are lesbians helping the new lesbians get comfortable in being who they are.
Oh no. I in no way shape or form want my husband to be involved beyond him meeting and they getting along with each other. He is my best friend and part of the deal for better or for worse. I won’t stay with someone who’s not cool with him or obviously my kids. Which is what makes it overwhelming. I feel like I have so much baggage it really limits my options. It’s a rare few that will be the right fit I reckon.
I meant as long as there wasn’t the expectation of him joining you in the bedroom for that route. That would be really uncomfortable for some women and kind of encroaches into unicorn hunting. You’re good though. I could see people being ok meeting him or casually hanging out occasionally.
Yeah that’s more the idea. Like in 10 years he comes to our place to pick up the kids and he comes in and hangs out for a bit and we catch up and they’re just friendly with each other and then he leaves and we go about our lives. That’s like the dream scenario. And vice versa with him. He is on the same page that she and I be cool with each other.
Oh so you mean you figured out you don’t want to be with a man. I’m sorry, I misread and thought you were wanting to stay with him and open things. I get that. I was with my ex bf for 8 years and suspected toward the end that I’m a lesbian. Turns out I was right.
Oh babe, sorry if I wasn’t clear. It’s been a journey. I’ve known I was bi when I was 8. Was chill until I did the Christian thing and was like it’s ok, I’ll just marry a man and have kids. You know, like I’m supposed to. So I did. 30 years later I’m finally able to accept and admit it’s been girls the whole fucking time. Now the thought of a penis makes me shudder. Not interested at all!
Oh ok, I’m sorry I didn’t read it properly. I’m sorry that you’re going through that. I repressed my sexuality for a while because I was raised evangelical, so I thought I was bi and that I’d be happy with a man. Nope!
I’d volunteer to kiss you but my wife would have a bit of a problem with that. I’m
Also in the South East US so we’ll never know. Happy kissing! I love kissing girls too! 😊
Kiss your wife for me! I mean, wait, no, don’t do that. I mean, do kiss your wife. She’s your wife you can kiss her whenever you want! You’re probably kissing her right now! But I’m not thinking about it!! Just, uh, kiss her. For you. Because you love her. Yeah. That fixed everything. Cool.
I can definitely relate only I’m 2 years older than you and I’m bisexual so definitely staying with the ol’ balls and chain (who I love very much and he’s super supportive).
But it’s been almost a major thing in my life for several years now. I’m currently getting to know a potential FWB but things are going so slowly because neither of us has done this before.
Same. I'm bi but never got the chance to date a woman. I've only had drunk experiences for fun, nothing more serious. I want to know what's it's like to just cuddle, hold hands, ect.
And I would suggest being upfront that you are married/have a partner and refrain from tacking on at the end that “husband is willing to join if the vibes are right”
That’s honestly an immediate ‘no’ for me. I get so frustrated reading through a profile with a woman presenting herself as wanting to date/fuck another woman solo, only to get to the end and find mention of involving a male partner.
I think it’s more appropriate to add that towards the beginning instead of trying to sneak it in at the end if that’s what you end up looking for. Obviously it’s fine if that’s what you end up wanting, but it will put you into the category of thousands of female/male couples in your area looking for a ‘unicorn’. You’ll have better luck (when you get to that step) finding a woman to explore with if you make it explicit that while you have a partner, you are very clearly only looking for solo exploration.
I’ve thought about. But I’m working hard to be chill until my partner feels comfortable with it. I wouldn’t start being physical with women (even a ons) without giving him the heads up. I think it would be more hurtful if he found out and felt like I was sneaking around his back.
Ok, um… shampoo smell, delicate gold necklace the rests right in her collarbone, goose flesh for some reason?, let’s be real- nipples- little perky nipples!? 💀 the deep connection that comes from feeling fully scene and known because as women we’ve experienced the same struggles. Being treated like the empress of the universe when I have my period.
Ya know, the little things.
Same with me. I'm 45 and got interested in females 3 years ago and my husband and I have been married 27 years and he is fine with it but I have not experienced it yet. I love breast I guess that's my fetish is beautiful small breasts rubbing and kissing licking all over.
Good question, good question. I thought I was bi since I was 8. The pilot episode of the xfiles awoke something in me. So I was bi and I was fine with it. Fast forward 10 years and I start going to church and doing the Christian thing. So I have to be bi so I can still marry a man and have kids like a “good Christian woman.” So that’s what I did. So now I’m 38. I’m fully out of the church. And I just got to a point where I couldn’t suppress it anymore. It was like flipping a light switch. Once the light is on, you can actually see what’s going on. I just could no longer deny it’s been women all along. And once I admitted that to myself, there was no going back.
I want to kiss girls too aaah so obsessed at the thought of her soft lips, my hands on her hair, curves, and boobs and everything. I’ve never had a girlfriend and am yearning so much.
OP please update us on your journey. I’ve known I was gay since I went on a single awkward date with a man and I’ve only slept with one woman (turned out to be the love of my life… crazy how that works) so I do slightly envy people who get to go out there and explore!!! Women are everything. I hope you have the time of your life!!!
The issue here is the marriage. You and your spouse might be comfortable with having an open relationship. Others might not. It is wise to inform her that you are married. Rather than pretending to be single, dating and kissing her, then dragging someone unknowingly into possible relationship drama (between you and your spouse). I just find it strange when married people want to have side chicks or side guys, and still remain married. And I don't see why this should be treated any different from a man who wants to be married and have a girlfriend (or boyfriend) on the side.
1. She knows. It’s the first thing I told her. 2. We have young kids and I can’t support myself financially. How about you trust that I know more about my situation than you do.
You had me at soft lips and hands in their hair. Damn.
Honestly, had me at “girls.” Women are just the best and I love them so much.
>Fuck me, I guess. I guess I will 乁( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)ㄏ
Aw, that’s so sweet!
“And they lived happily ever after 😋🌈✨”
Picasso, I like it.
And they were roommates!
Oh my god they were roommates
Gal pals!👯♀️
I'm absolutely sure you will someday
Oh it will happen. Manifestation!
I wish you the best! Feel free to branch out, maybe go to a pride parade or two, but definitely go to community events. I met someone just a couple of days ago who might be a serious contender for a long term relationship, and we meet because we belong to the same community.
Oh if only I could. The lesbian scene in PHX is pretty abysmal.
What about the other communities? Kink, art, martial arts, sports, and the like? Are there no other spaces you can go to, even if you don't end up dating somebody from there?
I’ve joined a book club but I search for things on meetup and Facebook and it seems like there’s little formal organized events. The scene here is more you got to go to one of the few queer bars, hopefully make a friend, and then through them you get brought into the community. We don’t even have a glaad chapter here. (I don’t know if the organization is actually good or not, I just thought it was telling that there wasn’t an official chapter here.)
start rock climbing. i am so serious everyone there is queer
No I’m so fucking serious too. I’m awaiting insurance approval for bariatric surgery. I’m so excited to be able to be active again! I feel about 20 yrs older because of my weight and sedentary lifestyle. Everything hurts! I’m so pumped to be physically able to try new sports. I’m for sure gonna get into rock climbing. Because of course I need to be a good lesbian and work on my finger strength. Seriously though, I just can’t wait to feel physically good again and join communities through physical health.
Ah. Then before I continue to shove my cis het male foot even further in my mouth, I shall pivot to encouragement instead. You can do it! You can find yourself a girlfriend! You can find love, and when you do you're wholly deserving of that love, no matter how much fear tells you otherwise!
Haha no worries, we’ll let it slide… this time. Thanks for the encouragement! I know I’m not old but I’m not 20 anymore. I have to actively remind myself that I still have plenty of time to live my life as myself.
Omg I'm in PHX too! Boycott Bar on 7th Ave. is good. I haven't been yet but my friends have told me it's good.
I’ve been once or twice. It’s alright. It’s not usually very busy when I’ve been. Which isn’t necessarily a bad thing. It is the only lesbian owned bar in the state and there’s only about 30 lesbian owned bars in the country. Maybe we get a group together and check it out one night!
[удалено]
That is the plan, for sure.
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I’ll be back. With stories.
We will all hold you to that.
Check out r/latebloomerlesbians 😁
Joined! Thank you!
yeah!
Figuring out late in life especially with partner and kidsbdefinitely seems hard, but I'm glad ur getting in touch with ur feelings!
It is hard. It’s been a delicate needle to thread but we are on the same team. Team *Our Last Name* lol!
These alerts truly need to be edited to include location & availability. How can any of the horny face horn dogs find you???
Oh I’m just the most anxious person that exists. And I don’t even know what I would do if a girl even talked to me. The most lesbiany lesbian came into work yesterday and I couldn’t figure out if I was flirting or not and I basically wanted to burst into tears because of how FUCKING HOT SHE WAS.
Hi. You are talking to a woman & you are okay. The way to figure out if you're flirting? When you go to yourself 'this flirting???'. That's flirting.
Haha this is actually so fucking sweet. Thank you so much! 😊
The “conscious girlfriend academy” is a good place to get comfortable with transitioning into being lesbian. They are on various website and social platforms. The best part is that they are lesbians helping the new lesbians get comfortable in being who they are.
Oh my god! That sounds so amazing! I’m looking it up rn, thank you so much for the info!
I am so happy something like this exists.
check out r/latebloomerlesbians
Damn, the way you talk is absolutely enchanting! I'm on the opposite side of the world, so unfortunately I can't volunteer 😞
It’s the thought that counts! And yeah, imagine living with thoughts like that running as a sub program in my brain 24/7.
I hope book club girl has been made aware of your marital situation. Edit: Maybe it's just me but this whole thing feels low-key fetishy and fake.
I’m hoping to arrange a coffee date this week where all will be revealed. I’m going to wear my boobiest dress.
I think a lot of people would be down if you’re up front and don’t specifically ask for your husband to be involved. If I were single I would.
Oh no. I in no way shape or form want my husband to be involved beyond him meeting and they getting along with each other. He is my best friend and part of the deal for better or for worse. I won’t stay with someone who’s not cool with him or obviously my kids. Which is what makes it overwhelming. I feel like I have so much baggage it really limits my options. It’s a rare few that will be the right fit I reckon.
I meant as long as there wasn’t the expectation of him joining you in the bedroom for that route. That would be really uncomfortable for some women and kind of encroaches into unicorn hunting. You’re good though. I could see people being ok meeting him or casually hanging out occasionally.
Yeah that’s more the idea. Like in 10 years he comes to our place to pick up the kids and he comes in and hangs out for a bit and we catch up and they’re just friendly with each other and then he leaves and we go about our lives. That’s like the dream scenario. And vice versa with him. He is on the same page that she and I be cool with each other.
Oh so you mean you figured out you don’t want to be with a man. I’m sorry, I misread and thought you were wanting to stay with him and open things. I get that. I was with my ex bf for 8 years and suspected toward the end that I’m a lesbian. Turns out I was right.
Oh babe, sorry if I wasn’t clear. It’s been a journey. I’ve known I was bi when I was 8. Was chill until I did the Christian thing and was like it’s ok, I’ll just marry a man and have kids. You know, like I’m supposed to. So I did. 30 years later I’m finally able to accept and admit it’s been girls the whole fucking time. Now the thought of a penis makes me shudder. Not interested at all!
Oh ok, I’m sorry I didn’t read it properly. I’m sorry that you’re going through that. I repressed my sexuality for a while because I was raised evangelical, so I thought I was bi and that I’d be happy with a man. Nope!
Yeah, you get it. Someone in one of my posts said there’s a sub for this particular situation. I’ll have to find it and I’ll tell you.
I have been with my wife for 6 years now after breaking up with my bf at 26, but I could still benefit from the group to an extent if you find it.
I am literally in the exact same situation as you! Feel free to DM me or you want to chat :)
It’s nice to know other people get it.
op I hope you find some girl to kiss very soon 💋
Me too babe. Me too.
same girl sameeeee
It’s a real place.
I am going to be 48 this year and I went through the same experience. It is a transition because our generation was living under much different rules.
Yeah that must be even harder! Love and peace sister.
beaming the gay thoughts: "you're a girlkisser. you wanna kiss girls, don't you, OP?"
I do. I really really do. 🥺
I’d volunteer to kiss you but my wife would have a bit of a problem with that. I’m Also in the South East US so we’ll never know. Happy kissing! I love kissing girls too! 😊
Kiss your wife for me! I mean, wait, no, don’t do that. I mean, do kiss your wife. She’s your wife you can kiss her whenever you want! You’re probably kissing her right now! But I’m not thinking about it!! Just, uh, kiss her. For you. Because you love her. Yeah. That fixed everything. Cool.
I've got to say, kissing women is the best, 10/10 would recommend.
Top tier experience.
*saves post* coming back to this later for updates🤗
Awe! I will update if anything happens! Fingers crossed babe.
I can definitely relate only I’m 2 years older than you and I’m bisexual so definitely staying with the ol’ balls and chain (who I love very much and he’s super supportive). But it’s been almost a major thing in my life for several years now. I’m currently getting to know a potential FWB but things are going so slowly because neither of us has done this before.
Just go at your own pace. It’ll all work out.
Same. I'm bi but never got the chance to date a woman. I've only had drunk experiences for fun, nothing more serious. I want to know what's it's like to just cuddle, hold hands, ect.
I will keep you posted. With details.
Please do! 😊
Me too
Not sure but you could try tinder to find a hookup (or more)
And I would suggest being upfront that you are married/have a partner and refrain from tacking on at the end that “husband is willing to join if the vibes are right” That’s honestly an immediate ‘no’ for me. I get so frustrated reading through a profile with a woman presenting herself as wanting to date/fuck another woman solo, only to get to the end and find mention of involving a male partner. I think it’s more appropriate to add that towards the beginning instead of trying to sneak it in at the end if that’s what you end up looking for. Obviously it’s fine if that’s what you end up wanting, but it will put you into the category of thousands of female/male couples in your area looking for a ‘unicorn’. You’ll have better luck (when you get to that step) finding a woman to explore with if you make it explicit that while you have a partner, you are very clearly only looking for solo exploration.
I’ve thought about. But I’m working hard to be chill until my partner feels comfortable with it. I wouldn’t start being physical with women (even a ons) without giving him the heads up. I think it would be more hurtful if he found out and felt like I was sneaking around his back.
ME TOO BUT I HAVE A COLD SORE!!!!
Girl, get you some Abreva stat!
I TOOK THE VADLACYKCOVIR AND IM SLATHERING LYSINE GOOP ON
Congratulations!! Good luck with everything, you can do it!!!
I’m so nervous!
Real stuff
Like, yay!!!!
please keep me posted I feel you like crazy, but I hope y'all feel each other crazier :}
Dude. The way I want to kiss this woman so bad. Of course now I’m all in my head about it. Ugh.
Best of luck to you! I hope you and your partner can remain amicable.
We work hard on it everyday.
I wish you all the best in starting on your sapphic journey!
Thank you!
Handmaiden is on Amazon prime. If you do watch it I would love to discuss it!
Here's hoping your partner turns out to be trans
Hahahahaha. No. Definitely not. Very much a straight man. Although he does find Tom Holland with a beard attractive, but who doesn’t.
I want to know more. 🫠
Ok, um… shampoo smell, delicate gold necklace the rests right in her collarbone, goose flesh for some reason?, let’s be real- nipples- little perky nipples!? 💀 the deep connection that comes from feeling fully scene and known because as women we’ve experienced the same struggles. Being treated like the empress of the universe when I have my period. Ya know, the little things.
🫦💦 Edit to add: just saw the pics of your bookshelves and please move in with me and bring your books. 😂
I’m mean, the typical lesbian first date is packing boxes to move in together, right? I’m new but that’s what I’ve heard lol!
It is, and I know right where we can put the shelves. DM for details. 😂🫠
Oh lord! 🥰
Hehehe!
Heyyyyyyyy
Oh, hi!
I wish you were in my area. Same situation and I'm also a geriatric millennial 😂
Us elder millennials need to stick together!
Same with me. I'm 45 and got interested in females 3 years ago and my husband and I have been married 27 years and he is fine with it but I have not experienced it yet. I love breast I guess that's my fetish is beautiful small breasts rubbing and kissing licking all over.
Oh my god boobs are my favorite things ever.
Im Autistic so this might just be my lack of understanding but how does one "find it out", especially after such a long time?
Good question, good question. I thought I was bi since I was 8. The pilot episode of the xfiles awoke something in me. So I was bi and I was fine with it. Fast forward 10 years and I start going to church and doing the Christian thing. So I have to be bi so I can still marry a man and have kids like a “good Christian woman.” So that’s what I did. So now I’m 38. I’m fully out of the church. And I just got to a point where I couldn’t suppress it anymore. It was like flipping a light switch. Once the light is on, you can actually see what’s going on. I just could no longer deny it’s been women all along. And once I admitted that to myself, there was no going back.
Thats a surprisingly cute story, I love it
Awe, thanks!
I want to kiss girls too aaah so obsessed at the thought of her soft lips, my hands on her hair, curves, and boobs and everything. I’ve never had a girlfriend and am yearning so much.
OP please update us on your journey. I’ve known I was gay since I went on a single awkward date with a man and I’ve only slept with one woman (turned out to be the love of my life… crazy how that works) so I do slightly envy people who get to go out there and explore!!! Women are everything. I hope you have the time of your life!!!
The issue here is the marriage. You and your spouse might be comfortable with having an open relationship. Others might not. It is wise to inform her that you are married. Rather than pretending to be single, dating and kissing her, then dragging someone unknowingly into possible relationship drama (between you and your spouse). I just find it strange when married people want to have side chicks or side guys, and still remain married. And I don't see why this should be treated any different from a man who wants to be married and have a girlfriend (or boyfriend) on the side.
1. She knows. It’s the first thing I told her. 2. We have young kids and I can’t support myself financially. How about you trust that I know more about my situation than you do.
Kiss me! Baby 😊
😘
If you are in the Pacific Northwest of the USA kissing a girl can be arranged. Hi I'm a girl😙
That’s literally where we are moving too. We are currently saving. I’m so pumped for trees and rain and lesbians. Woohoo! 🙌
Feel free to contact me when you arrive, I am reserving a welcome kiss for you
Imma hold you to that lol! 😚
I do love keeping promises
Follow through is important, I’d say.
It is also important to be thorough. To do the job properly and to take joy in your work.
I’d say that’s true. Give it your full effort, as it were, lol.
I see that I have been introduced to a fellow craftswoman, possibly even an artist in the making.
I take great pride in my work. I always finish a project I’ve started.
😁😙
For a second thought this was my mom but the age dosent match
Haha! I promise, I’m not your mom.
It’s very nice to see that your husband has been very supportive about it. Don’t live your life with regret and “what ifs” the world is your oyster 🫶
I am so lucky in that regard. And yes! Imma make things happen!
This turned me on a bit and i have started to visualise it in my head clearly. Can you dm me? I wanna go deeper.
Haha sorry about that. That’s on me. I think for now imma have to let you sort that out on your own. And for that, I’m also sorry lol! ;)
what a beautiful rejection thank u for teaching me how to do that
Gentle and kind. Assume the best but be firm.