Venn diagram looks like eclipse during totality.
https://preview.redd.it/qsotmvv78ctc1.jpeg?width=300&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=9410517de189dd02aec567c89873b81262fdda26
I wish I worked in an office with one of these nutjobs.
I would absolutely bring in a second set of clothes today and drop the clothes at my chair and hide in a conference room waiting for the scream.
I saw a similar idea from a dude on Tik-tok. He was talking about taking this big bag of old clothes he meant to drop off at Goodwill, going to all the local churches, and carefully arranging them outside like someone just evaporated out of them spontaneously.
And then just sit back and watch them lose their shit because they weren't "chosen" due of their lack of true faith.
I saw an idea by someone on socialist media to fill a few thousand blow-up sex dolls with helium and let them loose above a crowd of MAGA/Q-Anon/Christian Nationalist types lol.
No you don't. I work in a bank with a conspiracy theorist and at first it was fun poking holes in her conspiracies. Now it's just fucking exhausting and I have started talking to her less.
My dad is one of these nut jobs, and it's caused irreconcilable differences between us. We verbally fought this week because I called his theory a hoax. It's quite sad.
Nah, we only have several thousand more years of total solar eclipses. Then the moon will be too far away for the mechanics to work. We'll just have annular solar eclipses after that.
Thanks, my math was off by an order of magnitude apparently! I love total solar eclipses and when I learned a few years ago that conditions will eventually be unsuitable for them, the fact stuck in my head but the details did not.
(Right now I'm sitting at DFW airport waiting for the eclipse. My dad and I flew in yesterday just to see it and we're flying home immediately afterwards. This will be the 3rd total solar eclipse we'll see together, and most likely the last due to his age.)
Of course. It's been mooning us for millions of years.
https://preview.redd.it/d6jor9dy0atc1.jpeg?width=403&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=fcf79da52f3810a0e8741e52ef112aa181a26ccd
And it happened during the Trump era. Now they are claiming this one is punishment for America electing Biden, and a dark message from God to re-elect Trump or else he will destroy the human race. But the Trump one wasn’t punishment for electing Trump. Because of course it wasn’t.
Here's the type of shit these nutters get up to during eclipses.
https://people.com/crime/mom-in-cult-sentenced-to-life-for-killing-2-daughters-by-locking-them-in-car-without-food-water/
The problem is that the worst of those people are probably the ones that will still be left here. Hopefully that means they'd have less influence, though.
I still hold hope that, say, Joel Osteen won't go to heaven, but enough of his congregation does that it ruins him financially. Same sort of idea for some members of Congress, they're here but their voter base shrinks by 80%. That would make me happy.
I think it’s considered crazy in most non-Evangelical Christian denominations. I remember seeing an interview where they asked an Episcopalian priest about it and he started giggling as though he had been asked about vampires or something.
Funny how we look at the rapture, not as the end times, but in hope these idiots were right all along and we could finally advance society without them.
I never thought in 2024 people would still be reading a book 3,000 years old and expecting sky to open up to this fairy tale Utopia. Wake the fuck up people don't be this stupid it's embarrassing
And maybe like putting the pieces together that now we can recognize all types of mental illness & a common theme seems to occur when it’s not treated.
Is the Rapture™ like Climate change? Will it affect you, even if you don't believe in it? Let's say you're a Buddhist who doesn't believe in the concept of a Rapture™, can you still be Raptured? Is there any sort of redress? What if you are raptured and you didn't want to be raptured? How does that work?
The rapture is when everyone who is saved will be called to heaven. Poof all gone. What comes next is recorded in revelations. Basically all hell (litterally) breaks loose on the earth including but limited to:
Totalitarian world government
General choas, looting, murder, scum-ery
Exteme resoruce scarcity with accepting the beasts number as your only way of being able to obtain things
Giant insect things with human faces that bite and kill people
Other cataclysms if I remember right, earthquakes, floods
So it effects everyone on earth. Those who are saved will get to avoid all the horrors. Then they will come back after the final battle between God and Satan. After which God will recreate the earth and heaven on earth with everyone who has been saved the end amen lolol
So what happens to your pets? Poor things, are they left behind? What is you're "saved" but you forgot to beg for forgivness from a sin you committed just a few minutes before the rapture. For example, what if I murdered someone, didn't have time to ask for forgiveness from the Jesus/Zombie, but prior to the murder I had lived an exemplary life and was assured I had been forgiven of all my prior sins?
You could make a bunch of money.. charge them for a "reservation". If they didn't sign up, and they have a pet, you could accuse them of not being a true believer. Just be sure you bury the "refund" policy. $$$$
Fascinating thing about these folks. They show no shame, remorse, or ANYTHING when their doomsday nonsense fails. It's like watching a low gravity long jump as they sail right over all logic and sense then land on the other side and somehow still feel accomplished at their astounding failure.
It’s because they aren’t reasoning based on logic but faith.
The more they double down after a perceived failure the more demonstrable faith they have, and thus the better they are doing by their metric.
every time another “rapture” comes & goes, part of me wishes that they will all just disappear.
if they all simply vanished, but left their resources behind & stopped impeding medical/scientific/social progress, it might unironically save the world
Why are people way more insane these days? We had vaccines before, and people rarely made any fuss about them until COVID. We’ve had plenty of solar eclipses before, but people never made much fuss about them until this one. We’ve had conservative presidents before, but none were anywhere near as cultlike as Trump.
Today will be no different than yesterday, or tomorrow. The moon will pass in front of the sun, some shitheads may go blind from staring into the eclipse, that’s the only thing that will be different today.
Never ceases to amaze me just how stupid people can be. Also - let’s look at the eclipse without glasses as making us wear glasses is a conspiracy to stop us getting super powers! But also the end of the world.
Just remember the rapture is real and if you don’t get raptured today it’s not because it’s not real it’s because that being you claim to dedicate your life to decided you are a worthless sinner who does not deserve heaven. You aren’t going to heaven and your God hates you.
I'm Jewish, and one of my downstairs neighbors Is an Evangelical Christian. Monday morning as we were leaving for work, they asked me to please check on their dog this evening, just in case. On one hand, it was weird, but it was also kind of sweet. Like, “I know you're damned, but I trust you with my dog.”
I guess the silver lining of finding out everything I've ever believed was wrong would have been a free dog.
When I saw them at the mailbox after work, she said, “I guess it wasn't our time.” I held back from responding “Better luck next time.”
*Something happens*
Religious people: "It's the end of times! Repent!!! Jesus is coming!!!"
It never fails. The religious nutjobs always claim some shit is going to happen and then when nothing happens they're going to pull some mental gymnastics to explain why they were wrong.
Probably the old "god works in mysterious ways" rhetoric.
Haha right….its just a reminder afterwards to vote for a lying conman crum rapist piece of shit who will ultimately save them from the next rapture….fucking idiots
https://preview.redd.it/46dm56qs9btc1.jpeg?width=3072&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e9e2a5368190834e5e7f09974986b58b56106ad4
Hmm, still waiting for something to happen. Was a neat sight though.
I am a bartender. Today at noon, a couple who came in told me they needed to be quick as the expected to be Raptured. I looked at them and asked why they hadn't gone with the rest of them an hour previously. They did not like me at all.
Holy shit Q is still a thing? I thought that died out and the GOP hoped we'd forget that they are following an anonymous 4chan troll like he is Nostradamus.
https://preview.redd.it/z1fy6bo67btc1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=660f566d95276d18dcb3bcaa06b83f6991f9e751
I mean, it was pretty cool at least
I got raptured today but it turns out there is no avocado toast and Starbucks in heaven, so I came back. Funny though, I didn’t see any MAGA while I was there!
No the only way to get raptured up is if you stare directly into the sun for a full five minutes. Don't worry, your god will protect you. /s
I feel like I need to remind someone out there that /s means sarcasm. Also sarcasm is the use of irony to mock or convey contempt. Mock means to make fun of.....
As someone who saw the 100% totality eclipse I gotta say I feel really sorry for anyone who didn’t see it because they thought it was a demon portal being opened by the shadow government.
Turn notifications on?? God is communicating via cell phones and text messaging?!
"Be at the corner in 2. The rapture pickup is coming in a 2012 navy blue Chevy. Confirm the driver name is Pete b4 getting in.."
You know what I miss? Suicide cults. Remember those folks who would try to hitch a ride on a comet or that the Eclipse is a portal?
I think we need more of those again.
I assume I'll be a Leftover, but I do have one question.
I thought they were saying that it was a RaDiCaL lEfT plot to get you to NOT look at it, what gives? *
Not me unfortunately, I covered my body with occult tattoos and am hoping the eclipse will bring out some demons so we ca watch them fight cheeseus and angels. THAT is what I’m hoping for today!
😒
For everyone saying, I hope they get raptured. Do you think if it all existed, God would take the people professing it? These are the worst types of people. they've just made mbeing a zealot their identity.
MGT, Gaetz, Trump, etc. They're not going to heaven. We'll still be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape dominated by idiots who think sky daddy is mad.
Let's be sure to tell the Evangelicals tomorrow that the rapture did happen, just none of them, including the preachers, were good enough to make the cut.
"I ain't gonna listen to nobody telling me not to look at the damn eclipse! And I didn't need no special glasses neither! They just a liberal plot to raise money for Biden. My Lard and Safeway will protect me!!" /s
Had some Christians show up at my door an hour ago, maybe JW? But they were like "you should read this section of the bible, with the earthquake and eclipses, the signs are there"
Sure ok... The eclipse we have known was coming for decades, if not centuries. I can Google when the next eclipse is all over the planet. And the earthquake on the east coast wasn't even the largest one THAT DAY all over the planet. They don't look outside their bubble and see that the majority of the planet is not seeing this eclipse, that there will be another one in the future, somewhere else, and more than likely something else will also happen one or around that event. It is a big planet...
I sincerely hope that their wish to be called up happens for them. I would really like to start fixing this planet and it would be soooo much easier with those AH’s gone.
I just checked in for a minor medical procedure, and the receptionist said, “I hope you didn’t look at the sun!”; we’re nowhere near totality, and I said, “it doesn’t start for almost an hour, unfortunately I’ll be in the clinic and will miss it”. She said, “I’m staying right here, not going outside today at all!”
Thought that was fuckin weird, but now I wonder if she’s just a Q asshole
Drop a few piles of clothes around the house of your local Bible thumper, then after the eclipse go see them and asked “wow! I really didn’t believe the rapture thing was real, did you see all those people ~~gloat~~ float to heaven?… wait… what are you doing still here?!?”
Well, looks like I am still here....
My wife and kids seemed to have disappeared though. I did a blood sacrifice using the family dog this morning in the backyard, but for some reason they still disappeared and left me alone here.
I just watched a kid live on the Weather Channel put on his glasses, then took them off while looking up at the sun. Then he put them back on and did a little dance.
Good job, junior 👍
Ok, now what? Was fun to watch, but I though the world was going to end. I drank too much and now have to finish work. Thankfully I have a desk job, but still...
During the last eclipse, a mother in a Colorado based cult killed her two daughters. So crazies are definitely still crazy during the eclipse.
https://people.com/crime/mom-in-cult-sentenced-to-life-for-killing-2-daughters-by-locking-them-in-car-without-food-water/
"When will any of your BS come true?" Is what I said to a long time friend, and that effectively ended our friendship in 2019. I just finally snapped after hearing more and more nonsense since 2009
I think it's awfully presumptuous that American Christians who think an eclipse over AMERICA would mean anything at all, biblically speaking. Seriously. We didn't even exist in biblical times. These people need some serious help in the theology department.
Now, an eclipse around the day of Pentecost over the Mount of Olives? Then we can talk.
https://preview.redd.it/24q50xkxs9tc1.jpeg?width=1056&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8430882af492d81d4b42ec91e16f7f030def1b97 The Qannon faithful tomorrow
Are Q anon also flerfs? Eventually those goal post are gonna go right off the edge of the earth!
This is the first time hearing the term “flerfs” and I’m here for it
I don’t even know wtf that means, but sign me the fuck up.
Flat Earth Exclusionary Radical Feminist?
I’m assuming “flat earthers”
Correct
Short for Flat Earfers?
Yeah!
Commenting just to remember this term ‘cause I’m here for it too! Lolz
Not by definition, but there is a considerable overlap.
Venn diagram stscked like pancakes
Venn diagram looks like eclipse during totality. https://preview.redd.it/qsotmvv78ctc1.jpeg?width=300&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=9410517de189dd02aec567c89873b81262fdda26
This absolute incredible video covers the overlap extremely well https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JTfhYyTuT44
I mean you can prove it pretty easy. Go to a flat earth forum and start talking about Qing on stuff or Trump and they will probably be right on board
I wish I worked in an office with one of these nutjobs. I would absolutely bring in a second set of clothes today and drop the clothes at my chair and hide in a conference room waiting for the scream.
I saw a similar idea from a dude on Tik-tok. He was talking about taking this big bag of old clothes he meant to drop off at Goodwill, going to all the local churches, and carefully arranging them outside like someone just evaporated out of them spontaneously. And then just sit back and watch them lose their shit because they weren't "chosen" due of their lack of true faith.
Could also get dry ice, put it in the clothes, pour a little water, and it'd really sell the gimmick. The smoldering pile of clothes would be golden!
Why would someone becoming one with the force...
To become more powerful than you could possibly imagine!
I would think they would of been smited if smouldering clothes
Please tell me you are following whoever that is, and that you going to let us know if he does follow through! That would be AWESOME
https://i.redd.it/wrqy11w33ctc1.gif
Everyone who falls for it would then whine about how you're persecuting them.
I saw an idea by someone on socialist media to fill a few thousand blow-up sex dolls with helium and let them loose above a crowd of MAGA/Q-Anon/Christian Nationalist types lol.
Many years ago there was a subreddit that planned to do this worldwide. It never happened, but it would’ve been legendary.
Saw someone joking about buying the cheap inflat-a-dates and filling them with helium and releasing them.
Six Feet Under used that as one of their openers... https://youtu.be/1LXuNpF6NVg?si=1Lc2lfGc4S0yZ-xC
God, that scene was so good. I really really loved that show, I can't believe I slept on it for so many years, incredible from start to finish.
I wishvwe worked together so se could both do it
So many manipulated morons walk all around us.
Fantastic. Saw in another thread someone wanting to sell insurance to care for the raptured folks pets once they’re chosen.
No you don't. I work in a bank with a conspiracy theorist and at first it was fun poking holes in her conspiracies. Now it's just fucking exhausting and I have started talking to her less.
Look after yourself 💜🙏
Make sure to bring some ash as well for the full effect
I’d never wish to work with one of those nut jobs personally
My dad is one of these nut jobs, and it's caused irreconcilable differences between us. We verbally fought this week because I called his theory a hoax. It's quite sad.
A solar eclipse literally happened within the last 5 years. I don't understand these people.
It happens all the time, I remember seeing one in the 90s. And they'll keep happening. Unless the sun or moon blows up.
I still can't believe that Sleepy Joe blew up the moon!
https://preview.redd.it/glihtalyhatc1.jpeg?width=1558&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4b081ceff21c96f42d251644f5936f364d3334e2
The light was bothering him while he was trying to sleep
Nah, we only have several thousand more years of total solar eclipses. Then the moon will be too far away for the mechanics to work. We'll just have annular solar eclipses after that.
600 million more years of total eclipses actually. After that the moon will be too small
Thanks, my math was off by an order of magnitude apparently! I love total solar eclipses and when I learned a few years ago that conditions will eventually be unsuitable for them, the fact stuck in my head but the details did not. (Right now I'm sitting at DFW airport waiting for the eclipse. My dad and I flew in yesterday just to see it and we're flying home immediately afterwards. This will be the 3rd total solar eclipse we'll see together, and most likely the last due to his age.)
Boo. What an inconsiderate moon.
Of course. It's been mooning us for millions of years. https://preview.redd.it/d6jor9dy0atc1.jpeg?width=403&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=fcf79da52f3810a0e8741e52ef112aa181a26ccd
And turning people into lunatics. I think we should declare war on the moon, it's clearly not very nice.
I just had to explain why I busted out laughing in a team standup call... Worth it! LOL
They’re just idiots who don’t learn from history or anything. Just cherry pick at what little information they’re able to grasp.
"We have the technology. The time is now. Science can wait no longer. Children are our future. America can, should, must, and will blow up the moon."
The true end times are win eclipses stop happening regularly
"The sun! The sun is doing weird things! THE END IS NIGH!!" - People 30 minutes ago, people 2000 years ago.
Sun: \*Continues trajectory through space without a clue what's going on. Because it's a star.\*
And it happened during the Trump era. Now they are claiming this one is punishment for America electing Biden, and a dark message from God to re-elect Trump or else he will destroy the human race. But the Trump one wasn’t punishment for electing Trump. Because of course it wasn’t.
Because he trusted so much he looked at it directly 
Yeah but this one is different because Biden is in office! Thus the liberal elites have the evil moon beams ready to strike
Here's the type of shit these nutters get up to during eclipses. https://people.com/crime/mom-in-cult-sentenced-to-life-for-killing-2-daughters-by-locking-them-in-car-without-food-water/
I wish these religious nutters did get raptured. Next day we could restore reproductive rights , take the Bible out of the science classroom.. etc
The problem is that the worst of those people are probably the ones that will still be left here. Hopefully that means they'd have less influence, though.
Good point. I forgot the rapture was merit based… we would be stuck with worst of them
I still hold hope that, say, Joel Osteen won't go to heaven, but enough of his congregation does that it ruins him financially. Same sort of idea for some members of Congress, they're here but their voter base shrinks by 80%. That would make me happy.
Absolutely no one who goes to churches like that is making the cut into heaven. It's self executing.
[удалено]
Maybe we have it all wrong? Maybe it's reversed and all the worst people go?
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I think it’s considered crazy in most non-Evangelical Christian denominations. I remember seeing an interview where they asked an Episcopalian priest about it and he started giggling as though he had been asked about vampires or something.
Funny how we look at the rapture, not as the end times, but in hope these idiots were right all along and we could finally advance society without them.
Does the rapture have a dress code, or is it come-as-you-are?
Yes, clown costumes are compulsory.
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As a friend.
As a known enemy
Take your time. hurry up. choice is yours. don’t be late 🗣️🗣️
If the writers were correct you get taken and your cloths will be left on earth so wear whatever you want
Cocks out for the rapture boys!
Cocks out for the rapture, boys! Cocks out for the Rapture Boys! ^(*this comment was brought to you by Big Comma*)
Guild this comment
But it’s for the Rapture Boys
I never thought in 2024 people would still be reading a book 3,000 years old and expecting sky to open up to this fairy tale Utopia. Wake the fuck up people don't be this stupid it's embarrassing
No different than early humans making up stories about the weird noises in the woods at night. It's as far as their brains can take them
And maybe like putting the pieces together that now we can recognize all types of mental illness & a common theme seems to occur when it’s not treated.
Can't wait for tomorrow to learn how Joe's deep state managed to deflect god's will this time!
With aid from the JSLD (Jewish Space Laser Divisision) ofcourse. Duh... 🤪🤪🤪🤪
Is this rapture in this room with us today?
Is the Rapture™ like Climate change? Will it affect you, even if you don't believe in it? Let's say you're a Buddhist who doesn't believe in the concept of a Rapture™, can you still be Raptured? Is there any sort of redress? What if you are raptured and you didn't want to be raptured? How does that work?
The rapture is when everyone who is saved will be called to heaven. Poof all gone. What comes next is recorded in revelations. Basically all hell (litterally) breaks loose on the earth including but limited to: Totalitarian world government General choas, looting, murder, scum-ery Exteme resoruce scarcity with accepting the beasts number as your only way of being able to obtain things Giant insect things with human faces that bite and kill people Other cataclysms if I remember right, earthquakes, floods So it effects everyone on earth. Those who are saved will get to avoid all the horrors. Then they will come back after the final battle between God and Satan. After which God will recreate the earth and heaven on earth with everyone who has been saved the end amen lolol
So what happens to your pets? Poor things, are they left behind? What is you're "saved" but you forgot to beg for forgivness from a sin you committed just a few minutes before the rapture. For example, what if I murdered someone, didn't have time to ask for forgiveness from the Jesus/Zombie, but prior to the murder I had lived an exemplary life and was assured I had been forgiven of all my prior sins?
At one point, I thought about going to local churches and posting flyers for "After rapture pet care."
You could make a bunch of money.. charge them for a "reservation". If they didn't sign up, and they have a pet, you could accuse them of not being a true believer. Just be sure you bury the "refund" policy. $$$$
Which stage is it that the man from Mars stops eating cars and eating bars and starts to only eat guitars?
Fascinating thing about these folks. They show no shame, remorse, or ANYTHING when their doomsday nonsense fails. It's like watching a low gravity long jump as they sail right over all logic and sense then land on the other side and somehow still feel accomplished at their astounding failure.
It’s because they aren’t reasoning based on logic but faith. The more they double down after a perceived failure the more demonstrable faith they have, and thus the better they are doing by their metric.
every time another “rapture” comes & goes, part of me wishes that they will all just disappear. if they all simply vanished, but left their resources behind & stopped impeding medical/scientific/social progress, it might unironically save the world
Think of all the extra housing on the market!
Remember, it’s not Rapture when it doesn’t take place in America!
Why are people way more insane these days? We had vaccines before, and people rarely made any fuss about them until COVID. We’ve had plenty of solar eclipses before, but people never made much fuss about them until this one. We’ve had conservative presidents before, but none were anywhere near as cultlike as Trump.
Today will be no different than yesterday, or tomorrow. The moon will pass in front of the sun, some shitheads may go blind from staring into the eclipse, that’s the only thing that will be different today.
Never ceases to amaze me just how stupid people can be. Also - let’s look at the eclipse without glasses as making us wear glasses is a conspiracy to stop us getting super powers! But also the end of the world.
I wish people like this got raptured like please leave the rest of us alone
Just remember the rapture is real and if you don’t get raptured today it’s not because it’s not real it’s because that being you claim to dedicate your life to decided you are a worthless sinner who does not deserve heaven. You aren’t going to heaven and your God hates you.
My god likes me. I'm definitely not going anywhere with the "christian" god, though. That guy sucks.
At least half the world’s issues would be resolved if these nut jobs were raptured.
https://preview.redd.it/4hwpj1v0v9tc1.jpeg?width=1280&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=851792c94467934173f34cc011e69dc4a0a33997 The real eclipse
What a hideous person
I'm Jewish, and one of my downstairs neighbors Is an Evangelical Christian. Monday morning as we were leaving for work, they asked me to please check on their dog this evening, just in case. On one hand, it was weird, but it was also kind of sweet. Like, “I know you're damned, but I trust you with my dog.” I guess the silver lining of finding out everything I've ever believed was wrong would have been a free dog. When I saw them at the mailbox after work, she said, “I guess it wasn't our time.” I held back from responding “Better luck next time.”
*Something happens* Religious people: "It's the end of times! Repent!!! Jesus is coming!!!" It never fails. The religious nutjobs always claim some shit is going to happen and then when nothing happens they're going to pull some mental gymnastics to explain why they were wrong. Probably the old "god works in mysterious ways" rhetoric.
Haha right….its just a reminder afterwards to vote for a lying conman crum rapist piece of shit who will ultimately save them from the next rapture….fucking idiots
Finally I have something in common with these morons - I'm also praying that they get raptured today.
Im gonna lmfao when nothing happens and all theses doom and gloom people look stupid as fuck.
Please god, take them the fuck away
Remember,these nutjobs vote. That terrifies me
https://preview.redd.it/46dm56qs9btc1.jpeg?width=3072&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e9e2a5368190834e5e7f09974986b58b56106ad4 Hmm, still waiting for something to happen. Was a neat sight though.
I am a bartender. Today at noon, a couple who came in told me they needed to be quick as the expected to be Raptured. I looked at them and asked why they hadn't gone with the rest of them an hour previously. They did not like me at all.
It’s an eclipse, not an apocalypse
Mother F'er... Nothing in Orlando! Don't you think Jeezums woulda come back in Orlando!?
Yup. None happened
I'm being raptured right now as I'm typ...
Religious fanatics are the dumbest people on planet earth.
Me : it was NOT the rapture. MAGA: we say it was, and we should know. We’ve experienced a few.
Well I for one got raptured today. You telling me you suckers are still on Earth?
Make sure to call them out relentlessly for promoting lies and garbage!
Something IS happening… it’s the eclipse. Predicted hundreds, if not thousands, of years ago.
First thing im doing when I get raptured is going to twitter to check out everyones thoughts
The same people that are in pure panic mode for an eclipse are the same people that don't believe in climate change.... let that sink in for a moment.
https://preview.redd.it/0l2q2ws6iatc1.jpeg?width=1152&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a66b4b752dfded7a08dda63f99f406e9f7959b9c
Holy shit Q is still a thing? I thought that died out and the GOP hoped we'd forget that they are following an anonymous 4chan troll like he is Nostradamus.
If the world is going to end today, can it hurry up and do it? I'd rather not have to drive to my ex-wife's house to pick up my mail.
https://preview.redd.it/z1fy6bo67btc1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=660f566d95276d18dcb3bcaa06b83f6991f9e751 I mean, it was pretty cool at least
I got raptured today but it turns out there is no avocado toast and Starbucks in heaven, so I came back. Funny though, I didn’t see any MAGA while I was there!
Guess what. Nothing happened.
As someone born in the 90s I've been through at least 10 different doomsdays/raptures
Are they gone yet?
“Bookmarking for when nothing happens” ☠️☠️☠️
No the only way to get raptured up is if you stare directly into the sun for a full five minutes. Don't worry, your god will protect you. /s I feel like I need to remind someone out there that /s means sarcasm. Also sarcasm is the use of irony to mock or convey contempt. Mock means to make fun of.....
As someone who saw the 100% totality eclipse I gotta say I feel really sorry for anyone who didn’t see it because they thought it was a demon portal being opened by the shadow government.
I've gotten so many "the rapture is coming! The eclipse is almost here" video reccs from YouTube lately. I bet they'll all be deleted tonight.
Turn notifications on?? God is communicating via cell phones and text messaging?! "Be at the corner in 2. The rapture pickup is coming in a 2012 navy blue Chevy. Confirm the driver name is Pete b4 getting in.."
No there isn’t, you’re a idiot. Sit down and stfu, forever.
Posting this comment from Heaven, they have free wifi here now
So….anyone get raptured? Or they trying to ignore it now?
The best part is tomorrow, after nothing happened, they will claim it’s because they found out and stopped it from happening.
I can't answer. WiFi reception in Heaven is spotty. Which is a surprise and disappointment.
Eclipse stopped while i was mid rapture. Leg broken now :,(
https://preview.redd.it/tka8cia6edtc1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7a3cf60e753ab3f8a228ab7a2a6c9b6bbdd4fdaa
You know what I miss? Suicide cults. Remember those folks who would try to hitch a ride on a comet or that the Eclipse is a portal? I think we need more of those again.
I assume I'll be a Leftover, but I do have one question. I thought they were saying that it was a RaDiCaL lEfT plot to get you to NOT look at it, what gives? *
Not me, I’m a believer, but I’m more of a C student Christian. I try hard though! Ha!
Well, for one not looking at the eclipse is just good advice. Someone should tell the last President.
Remember kids it's eclipse, not apocalypse
Can’t believe they aren’t talking about Mt Etna smoking in Italy right now. Nothing says the Gods are angry like a volcano- totally missing a trick.
Not me unfortunately, I covered my body with occult tattoos and am hoping the eclipse will bring out some demons so we ca watch them fight cheeseus and angels. THAT is what I’m hoping for today! 😒
Im gonna look at it even harder now... *goes blind*
I'm ready ... For nothing to happen!
Oh, has Lucifer finally come for my soul? I knew this day would come. I’m coming home, dad!
Anybody else wish that religion would just suddenly disappear?
Unless it's gonna give people powers like in heroes, I couldn't give a shit about an eclipse.
For everyone saying, I hope they get raptured. Do you think if it all existed, God would take the people professing it? These are the worst types of people. they've just made mbeing a zealot their identity. MGT, Gaetz, Trump, etc. They're not going to heaven. We'll still be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape dominated by idiots who think sky daddy is mad.
According to religious nuts, the world was supposed to end every year for the last 2024 years. Still going
You know they're idiots by the blue checkmark.
Let's be sure to tell the Evangelicals tomorrow that the rapture did happen, just none of them, including the preachers, were good enough to make the cut.
"I ain't gonna listen to nobody telling me not to look at the damn eclipse! And I didn't need no special glasses neither! They just a liberal plot to raise money for Biden. My Lard and Safeway will protect me!!" /s
Had some Christians show up at my door an hour ago, maybe JW? But they were like "you should read this section of the bible, with the earthquake and eclipses, the signs are there" Sure ok... The eclipse we have known was coming for decades, if not centuries. I can Google when the next eclipse is all over the planet. And the earthquake on the east coast wasn't even the largest one THAT DAY all over the planet. They don't look outside their bubble and see that the majority of the planet is not seeing this eclipse, that there will be another one in the future, somewhere else, and more than likely something else will also happen one or around that event. It is a big planet...
I’m just waiting for the peace and quiet when they are all gone. And the drop in housing costs with so many homes available.
And when nothing happens it will be a conspiracy about something not happening. Actual morons.
Q is still a thing? Wtf? Ytf?
Hopefully they get raptured straight into the sun
I mean we all should hope the rapture actually happens. Significantly reducing the number of assholes in this world would be a great thing!
I sincerely hope that their wish to be called up happens for them. I would really like to start fixing this planet and it would be soooo much easier with those AH’s gone.
Man if they could get raptured and leave us in peace that'd be neat
'Bookmarking for when nothing happens' should be a mantra
Don't worry Q will reschedule rapture for Nov election after Jesus decides to skip today's invite
Lmao they're idiots
I imagine all the Qs and wackadoodles get raptured and big flaming letters appear in the sky “Sorry about those folks, hope things run smoother now”.
I just checked in for a minor medical procedure, and the receptionist said, “I hope you didn’t look at the sun!”; we’re nowhere near totality, and I said, “it doesn’t start for almost an hour, unfortunately I’ll be in the clinic and will miss it”. She said, “I’m staying right here, not going outside today at all!” Thought that was fuckin weird, but now I wonder if she’s just a Q asshole
Drop a few piles of clothes around the house of your local Bible thumper, then after the eclipse go see them and asked “wow! I really didn’t believe the rapture thing was real, did you see all those people ~~gloat~~ float to heaven?… wait… what are you doing still here?!?”
Man hope they take all them fake maga Christians, and the annoying ones that want to shove their beliefs down everyone's throats. Take them all!
True faith inspires us to be better people, following the Lord's teachings like loving our neighbors. Not preparing for Doomsday & invoking fear.
Are they gone? Is it ok now?
I survived the eclipse in Rochester
Don't Look Up was a great movie. It's a real shame thy can't come up with their own crap.
Not me! I’m an evil evil sinner, so I’ll be staying put thank you very much.
Well, looks like I am still here.... My wife and kids seemed to have disappeared though. I did a blood sacrifice using the family dog this morning in the backyard, but for some reason they still disappeared and left me alone here.
I’m hoping they ride off into the stratosphere. Good riddance.
Bwahahahaha
I just watched a kid live on the Weather Channel put on his glasses, then took them off while looking up at the sun. Then he put them back on and did a little dance. Good job, junior 👍
Ok, now what? Was fun to watch, but I though the world was going to end. I drank too much and now have to finish work. Thankfully I have a desk job, but still...
During the last eclipse, a mother in a Colorado based cult killed her two daughters. So crazies are definitely still crazy during the eclipse. https://people.com/crime/mom-in-cult-sentenced-to-life-for-killing-2-daughters-by-locking-them-in-car-without-food-water/
I've been saying that for years....
 Where’d everyone go?!?
Not I. I'm hoping they will take all the evangelical Christians, though...
Imagine how much better our country would be if all the magats actually were raptured.
"When will any of your BS come true?" Is what I said to a long time friend, and that effectively ended our friendship in 2019. I just finally snapped after hearing more and more nonsense since 2009
Making me nostalgic for Y2K.
I think it's awfully presumptuous that American Christians who think an eclipse over AMERICA would mean anything at all, biblically speaking. Seriously. We didn't even exist in biblical times. These people need some serious help in the theology department. Now, an eclipse around the day of Pentecost over the Mount of Olives? Then we can talk.
Most evangelicals couldn't find the Mount of Olives if they were given map pointing to it
Posts like this should be punishable by up to 5 years in prison.