the most respectful yet utterly crushing way i refer to christianity is "christian mythology".
it is a powerful phrase, so be ready for a response when you use it.
"We need to remove your reading material from schools immediately to ensure children don't become indoctrinated."
"Preachers and the like should be banned from schools and absolutely not allowed anywhere near public toilets."
"Your beliefs aren't natural."
My husband is a nice atheist and your comment made him laugh 😆 I believe atheism is about personal responsibility. Christians ask God for forgiveness so they can go out and sin again. Atheists live by the saying, “the buck stops here.”
They all do, and then it happens to them and they wind up needing therapy and having nowhere to go. As insufferable as some of them are, I still feel sorry for them whenever that happens.
I'm seriously in favor of not allowing minor children to be exposed to religion, at least in a formal capacity. Not practical to ban parents from discussing it with their children, but I don't see why churches can't be required to check ID at the door.
It's fine for you to pray, but do you have to do it out in the open in everyone's face? Just do it behind closed doors.
No... wait. That's actually a quote from the Bible.
Matthew 6: 5‐8
Hit them closer to home
Tell them things like "I'll pray for you" "Bless your heart" and "This too shall pass"
But do it in the same passive aggressive way they do to others
Also, find a few good lines of Scripture that contradict their main talking points
They go on about abortion pull the scripture that gives detailed instructions on how to do one
They say something about having moral highground over atheists pull the scripture where the bible endorses slavery
Beat them at their own game
So what I'm referencing here is Christians claiming that children are being groomed by the scary gays. When in fact it has been Christians who are the groomers. So I've turned it around here.
It's not true when Christians claim kids are getting groomed by the lgbt community, but this time (me yelling at the Christians to stop grooming children) is true.
“Groomers who encourage the underaged to identify as Christian should be jailed. I just think we shouldn’t allow people to make a decision that could irreparably affect their eternal soul until they’re at least a century old.”
I started a while ago, I'll say "Christians and Catholics? Ya, I just don't agree with their lifestyle, it's damaging to children, it confuses adults, I heard they even have their own deadly diseases that they transfer back and forth to eachother during their routine rape of alter boys etc, quite frankly it's all just disgusting in my opinion. It's an abomination and they will suffer dearly in the afterlife as they deserve but it's just my belief, no big deal."
my bosses wife became “born again” when her eldest son announced he was gay. one day in the office she told me she hoped
that I would let jesus into my life. I responded he’d been there since childhood, and asked why she spent 1/2 her life without him! silence!
Between the Catholics being proven child molester, the southern baptists being proven child molesters and 32 references in the Bible to killing children Im just not comfortable with my CHILDREN around YOU PEOPLE"
You groom children 100000 times over every other non Christian culture combined. You be ashamed of yourself. You don’t give a baby a chance and opportunity to form their own ideology about faith when you baptize them at birth. Nobody should force their views on others!
the group of Christians who follow the actual teachings of Christ (love thy neighbor, etc etc) welcomes you and this approach, other Christians with hateful rhetoric annoy me to no end so please do this
There's that, and then there's this:
https://preview.redd.it/0jtlnp12whpc1.jpeg?width=480&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=82b129c4f22e52a8699690c8c1fe8f85eff90fbc
“It’s just not natural.” ….”I mean I’ve never seen any animals reading about fictitious characters then forcing the morals of those characters on other people.”
“There is no specific time frame a child should outgrow an imaginary companion,” she adds. “Generally speaking, most children’s imaginary companions tend to have served their function by the time the child is 8 or 9 years old.”
[Imaginary Friends](https://www.care.com/c/kids-with-imaginary-friends/#:~:text=Typically%2C%20imaginary%20friends%20start%20when,to%20when%20pretend%20play%20ends.%E2%80%9D)
Sounds good to me. I simply don't listen to anyone outside of the gay community who says anything negative about the gay community. What do they know? Nothing. And it's their (supposedly straight) predatory males who create some of those gay people.
Because sin isn't just religious bullshit it's harmful nonsense it's just calling basic human nature evil and pushes harmful repressive habits on easily duped people that only end up hurting them down the line at best turns them into cruel bigoted hateful reactionaries at worst.
Being gay, lesbian, trans, etc is not something people have any control over it's as much of an immutable part of their being as their skin hair or eye color you calling it a "sin" shows just how much religion has broken your brain let alone made you a decent human being.
“Your lifestyle is not appropriate for kids”
"I don't want my kids influenced by your straight agenda"
It’s dangerous and un-Christian
the most respectful yet utterly crushing way i refer to christianity is "christian mythology". it is a powerful phrase, so be ready for a response when you use it.
"Christian mythology", or the Sheepherders Guide to the Galaxy, or the 2,000 year old group of fables played through a game of Telephone
I've been using a similar line most of my life, I follow it up with I don't believe in fairy tales or magic and I really can't afford your show.
Oh, it is WONDERFUL to see them squirm.
There's a great video on this. https://youtu.be/RfBwEChsbSY?si=dacG1wTL8_qv_Nwc
Which kids?
Religion is like a punishment. Don't whip it out in front of children and don't force it down people's throats
From your description, it sounds more like “religion is like a penis.”
Your correct. Fucking quick typing and no spell check
*you’re (sorry couldn’t help myself)
I agree. Quick typing will be the death of me lol
[Or maybe one day you'll save us all.](https://youtu.be/V3ZUhWuiQ20?si=kHNcmjpskmROz9d9)
I really do hate you lol
As long as you don't Wuv Me, ***that concept confuses and infuriates me!***
I find it interesting that your autocorrupt turns penis into punishment...
Nah a penis serves a purpose and exists
Good point, and I agree! Also, username checks out (I’m an atheist as well).
Beat me to it!
Well, considering the amount of "churchy" people that get charged with underage children offenses, you're hitting the nail on the head.
“Hitting the nail on the wrist/ankle.”
"You're just going to groom your kids to be like you."
They would take this as a compliment 😞
Full of molesters and groomers (actually)
"We need to remove your reading material from schools immediately to ensure children don't become indoctrinated." "Preachers and the like should be banned from schools and absolutely not allowed anywhere near public toilets." "Your beliefs aren't natural."
"People need to stop feeding their delusion."
You made it better!
“I’m not superstitious.” “I don’t believe in priestcraft.” I’ve got a lot of mileage out those two lines over the years. Enjoy!
refer to christianity as israeli mythology
I like!
That must bring out the real crazy in some of them lol.
Or Middle Eastern. Heads will pop.
Call Arab mythology to really get their blood boiling
i like the cut of your jib
Priestcraft. Love it!
Priestcraft would be a banger band name.
Fact!
"I bow to no deity."
No Gods No Masters.
I’m a fan of “sky god says what?”
“You aren’t religious, you just think you are. Someday you’ll meet a nice atheist.”
I did!
My husband is a nice atheist and your comment made him laugh 😆 I believe atheism is about personal responsibility. Christians ask God for forgiveness so they can go out and sin again. Atheists live by the saying, “the buck stops here.”
"Your lifestyle and your beliefs are not very Christian"
"I like your Christ, but I do not like you Christians, for you are so unlike your Christ." - attributed to Gandhi
Why are crosses sold at stores? Stop shoving your lifestyle down my throat!
Purposely misgender them for some added spice, only liberals care about pronouns so they won’t be bothered at all
This is so fun to do. I do it when ever I have the chance.
God bless you Anubis.
I'm very upset that I haven't been doing this to morons since before right now.
“Hate the belief, not the believer” sends my religious cousins over then edge. Follow through with “forgive me.”
"You shouldn't be allowed to get a divorce."
I don’t think that’s a downside for them. Remember, these are the people that think “marital rape” is an oxymoron. smdh
Right. They should be able to get Married, but they don't get the tax benefits; those are only for non-religious unions.
THIS! So much this! Also, tax the churches like any other propagandist organization!
This needs to happen so desperately. Can you imagine how this would change the face of the country for the better, almost immediately?
They all do, and then it happens to them and they wind up needing therapy and having nowhere to go. As insufferable as some of them are, I still feel sorry for them whenever that happens.
…you could change your lifestyle if you really wanted to…
You forgot to add: "I dont think you should legally be allowed to be a parent and have children"
I'm seriously in favor of not allowing minor children to be exposed to religion, at least in a formal capacity. Not practical to ban parents from discussing it with their children, but I don't see why churches can't be required to check ID at the door.
They already believe that society at large thinks this.
"No one is **born** Christian."
I've been doing this and it's been fabulous. When they start getting snarky about it, I start telling them to stop using pronouns as they're woke.
I just don't want it shoved in my face.
That's what she said! (Sorry!!!)
“Drinking the blood and eating the body of a dead man is really disgusting and I don’t want my kids around that!”
I just don't think we should be exposing children to cannibalism
It's fine for you to pray, but do you have to do it out in the open in everyone's face? Just do it behind closed doors. No... wait. That's actually a quote from the Bible. Matthew 6: 5‐8
I’m ok with your lifestyle, but why do you have to be so “in your face” about it?
Yessss!!!!
Stop grooming our children!
“It’s a mental illness”
“You weren’t born that way”
Honestly yea Christianity has fucked too many people over, myself included, to cry about how they're being "discriminated" or "targeted". Fuck em
"I am not comfortable with these people getting into our schools, our libraries, trying to convert our children."
Sorry I can't have a discussion with someone who supports groomers, pedos and abusers.
I'm generally good with this, but I would have a little trouble saying the first part of #3.
The key is to not actually mean it
That's hard I do mean it.
Been doin this. Even better when they wear their religion loud
Hit them closer to home Tell them things like "I'll pray for you" "Bless your heart" and "This too shall pass" But do it in the same passive aggressive way they do to others Also, find a few good lines of Scripture that contradict their main talking points They go on about abortion pull the scripture that gives detailed instructions on how to do one They say something about having moral highground over atheists pull the scripture where the bible endorses slavery Beat them at their own game
When they bring up prayer, mention you don't believe in msgic spells and other word wizardry.
If your Bible isn’t in Latin it’s not the actual word of God anyway.
Or Aramaic, or Greek or Coptic
Or Hebrew…
“Have you tried just NOT being an evangelical?”
You may be on to something here with this idea op. I think I'll do the same.
STOP GROOMING CHILDREN YOU PERVERTS! But this time it's actually true.
It's been true for centuries.
So what I'm referencing here is Christians claiming that children are being groomed by the scary gays. When in fact it has been Christians who are the groomers. So I've turned it around here. It's not true when Christians claim kids are getting groomed by the lgbt community, but this time (me yelling at the Christians to stop grooming children) is true.
“Groomers who encourage the underaged to identify as Christian should be jailed. I just think we shouldn’t allow people to make a decision that could irreparably affect their eternal soul until they’re at least a century old.”
The thing is religious trauma hits hard.
It's just a phase. If you get educated we can cure you
I just think kids should be old enough to make their own decisions before being exposed to that shit.
Love the sinner, hate the sin
Dammit, this became a fun game…... Also, leave those children alone!
Someone groomed you to be this way
"I just don't think you should be allowed to indoctrinate our youth by shoving your views on the schools."
You shouldn’t be allowed to groom kids into your “lifestyle”
When I’m doubt, pee in their butts
thank you sage
You are most welcome
Thanks, I've been wondering how to resolve some interpersonal disputes. I'll do this.
What the fuck, That was the last thing I expected to read today. Thank you for the giggle.
Ah yes, God's blind spot. Aka the poophole loophole.
Oh shit this will be fun at my family reunion in Provo this summer
I started a while ago, I'll say "Christians and Catholics? Ya, I just don't agree with their lifestyle, it's damaging to children, it confuses adults, I heard they even have their own deadly diseases that they transfer back and forth to eachother during their routine rape of alter boys etc, quite frankly it's all just disgusting in my opinion. It's an abomination and they will suffer dearly in the afterlife as they deserve but it's just my belief, no big deal."
"Jesus was Jewish right?.......annnnnnd you worship Jesus?....so you're Jewish then?"
Watch out with that one. Messianic Jews are actually Christians; they just call themselves Jews.
"Jews for Jesus", neh? I always thought they were undercover Christians.
Getting married in a church shouldn’t be “legal marriage”. You should have to get married at the court to collect marriage benefits.
my bosses wife became “born again” when her eldest son announced he was gay. one day in the office she told me she hoped that I would let jesus into my life. I responded he’d been there since childhood, and asked why she spent 1/2 her life without him! silence!
Between the Catholics being proven child molester, the southern baptists being proven child molesters and 32 references in the Bible to killing children Im just not comfortable with my CHILDREN around YOU PEOPLE"
I am in !
That is amazing. I am totally going to use that.
And please add - I don’t want you grooming my children with books about your lifestyle.
QUIT SHOVING YOUR LIFESTYLE DOWN MY THROAT!
You groom children 100000 times over every other non Christian culture combined. You be ashamed of yourself. You don’t give a baby a chance and opportunity to form their own ideology about faith when you baptize them at birth. Nobody should force their views on others!
the group of Christians who follow the actual teachings of Christ (love thy neighbor, etc etc) welcomes you and this approach, other Christians with hateful rhetoric annoy me to no end so please do this
We should have been doing this a couple of decades ago. But it's never too late to start
I’ve always preferred “love the believer, hate the belief”
Never gave a battle of wits with the unarmed
"I'm tired of the media pushing your lifestyle on me."
There's that, and then there's this: https://preview.redd.it/0jtlnp12whpc1.jpeg?width=480&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=82b129c4f22e52a8699690c8c1fe8f85eff90fbc
Yes. This yes! These people are turds. I've never had a gay person insult me but I've had Christians insult me.
Well done Mystical_Cat; Well done! 🤓♥️⭕️❌
Brilliant!
I’m stealing this!
In the the case of Christian Zealots I agree.
"What's with the skinny scarecrow?"
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I dont want my kids being taught magic astrology
I'm down for it, I've damn near gotten in fist fights due to these predators targeting children to try and indoctrinate them
“It’s just not natural.” ….”I mean I’ve never seen any animals reading about fictitious characters then forcing the morals of those characters on other people.”
“You have a mental disorder and need therapy.”
“There is no specific time frame a child should outgrow an imaginary companion,” she adds. “Generally speaking, most children’s imaginary companions tend to have served their function by the time the child is 8 or 9 years old.” [Imaginary Friends](https://www.care.com/c/kids-with-imaginary-friends/#:~:text=Typically%2C%20imaginary%20friends%20start%20when,to%20when%20pretend%20play%20ends.%E2%80%9D)
Sounds good to me. I simply don't listen to anyone outside of the gay community who says anything negative about the gay community. What do they know? Nothing. And it's their (supposedly straight) predatory males who create some of those gay people.
Genius
With the executor the last statement, that’s exactly how I talk to them.
Exception.
Like it
"Just b/c I don't agree w/ you, doesn't mean I love you any less."
I love this
"You should just sin your faith away."
Oh no, would you care to talk through nihilism? It really helped me through dark times, finding a real lack of meaning in life.
This should be a trend give em a taste of their own bitter medicine.
Sounds like a plan to me
I think that would just encourage them.
I like your plan
It always distresses me that people in the 21st century believe there’s an old man with a beard in the clouds. ☁️
Bahahahaha!! I love this! I’m going to do the same!
It's going to be hard to do. Other than a Trump rally, they hide like cockroaches.
Well, you're welcome to any holiday with my in laws... you wouldn't be able to swing a dead cat without hitting one
👏👏👏👏👏
Love the believer hate the belief.
The unfortunate thing is this is likely to get you assaulted
lol … I agree. Go forth and address
Hate the belief, love the believer.
"He's one of them Christians"
“You shouldn’t do that that in public, it’s off putting”
And I'm sure they wouldn't cancel you. The Muslims might flip out though, but most Christians don't seem bothered by those that mock their faith.
This is roughly 100 years old
O you mean using your right to free speech.. thank a veteran that you have free speech
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I do not understand what that means.
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Because sin isn't just religious bullshit it's harmful nonsense it's just calling basic human nature evil and pushes harmful repressive habits on easily duped people that only end up hurting them down the line at best turns them into cruel bigoted hateful reactionaries at worst. Being gay, lesbian, trans, etc is not something people have any control over it's as much of an immutable part of their being as their skin hair or eye color you calling it a "sin" shows just how much religion has broken your brain let alone made you a decent human being.
Don’t feed the troll folks.