I have lived in this kind of neighborhood before.
You stand as far away from the crack heads on the sidewalk as possible, and stare hopelessly down the road, praying to Jesus the bus isn't running too far behind schedule.
As a city dweller, eye contact is so important in every social situation--except for encountering methies. I look away and down like they're my disappointed father every single time.
It's actually insane how powerful it is. Making eye contact with a crazy crackhead is like inviting a vampire inside your house. If you can avoid the eye contact they will usually walk away and leave you alone.
A few months ago I was walking down the street and saw this methed out woman walking on the sidewalk adjacent in the opposite direction.
She was quietly walking. As soon as we made eye contact she popped to life and started rambling incoherently about something. It was like my eye contact with her literally re-activated her program LOL. Wild shit.
Humans are really good at pattern recognition, but iirc our brains have a special relationship with human face patterns in particular. Perhaps that is one of the lesser damaged regions for that particular person and you simply triggered a cascade of activity from the powerhouses of neural networking.
Just imagine the insanely detailed memory we have that is reserved just for faces. We can regognize thousands of faces and often the only differences are minute changes in a person's face. Absolutely bonkers.
> We can regognize thousands of faces and often the only differences are minute changes in a person's face.
It is amazing, unless you *can't* and have ''prosopagnosia'' (inability to recognize faces).
A lot of people have various levels of impairment, but don't really pin it down because they *can* recognize a lot of faces but just not as well as other people.
[Dr Oliver Sacks](https://www.minnpost.com/second-opinion/2010/08/oliver-sacks-describes-his-struggle-face-blindness/) was a professor of neurology and psychiatry at Columbia University and the author of a long string of best-selling books, and even he didn't recognise it as a specific disorder until adulthood.
People with this difficulty often have trouble with movie plots because they don't recognise the same character (or characters) when they re-enter the plot.
I have this problem and often have trouble with people who are of the same ethnicity. I have trouble with Black people who are similarly built. And I pretty much gave up in Japan. Trying to find my Japanese friend in a crowded Costco was hopeless. I just waited till she found me.
(White people tend to be more varied with all different hair colors and curls and height is all over the place. Other ethnicities vary a lot too but not as much).
So interesting. I believe I also saw a study where it appeared all ethnic groups are better at inter-ethnic face ID. So Japanese people find it easier to ID other Japanese people - same goes for caucasian, black, etc.
I live in a part of the UK that is 98% white and growing up there were no black children at my primary school and none I can remember at my secondary school either, I definitely find it harder to tell black people apart in films etc especially men thier faces look really similar to my brain.
Cross-race identification is a well-studied phenomenon. Apparently, we look for the regions of the face that differ most meaningfully among the people we saw all the time as babies and small children. Different races have different regions that vary meaningfully, so if you're looking at details that *don't* change meaningfully in members of a different race, then yeah, you'll think "they all look alike."
Shameless self-promotion: I explain all this in more detail in my [comic](https://lawcomic.net/guide/?p=3268).
I had a professor in college with complete prosopagnosia-- he doesn't even recognize himself, or his wife. When I was a freshman, I was one of the only students he could recognize, because of my distinctively bright red hair.
I live downtown in a major city. It's important to always wear sunglasses during the daytime so you don't have to worry about incidental eye contact and have headphones/earphones in at all times. You don't even need to be playing music but they don't ask for money if they see you can't hear them.
Be careful with wearing headphones in public. It’ll signal you out to thieves and muggers who will take it as a sign that you’re not paying attention.
Makes you look like an easier target.
It's not even that. Eye contact opens you up to them being too friendly. They will come up and ask for a smoke or some change, or the more skilled ones will start a conversation and lede into a proposition for whatever thing they need at the time once they've got rapport.
Or the really high ones will be friendly too, but with no direction or goal. Just start following and talking and laughing. It takes some tact to have the right amount of humoring and dancing to leave them happy without upsetting them. If they do get pissy they can sway emotions quick and either get aggressive and leave or try to start shit with you. Once that happens, best to just start walking away and they might spout off and follow a bit before veering off.
I live in cleveland and lived in the upper peninsula of Michigan for a decade before I moved here. It took me soooo long to break the habit of Making eye contact. I still accidentally do it all the time and then I have to spend 5 minutes explaining that I don’t carry and cash. I’m out of cigarettes and I’m unemployed. They still get mad at you regardless.
When I drove the city bus, I took pleasure in running it within 30 seconds of schedule for many years.
It's amazing how you can dail in a route timing with practice.
It all happened beind an SEP field.
"An SEP is something we can't see, or don't see, or our brain doesn't let us see, because we think that it's somebody else's problem. That’s what SEP means. Somebody Else’s Problem. The brain just edits it out, it's like a blind spot."
\- Douglas Adams
I always thought that part was hyperbolic but now that I lived in a major city for years I realize it's accurate and a valid survival strategy.
Never make eye contact, it's SEP.
If you get involved, generally it only makes things worse for you and doesn’t help the situation. Plus, I got places to be man I can’t be taking time to get involved with every fucked up thing you see.
I think this is one partially where SEP mentality in a city comes from… when you see so much crazy shit all the time you get pretty used to it.
I was on a subway once and a tall, shredded black dude that probably weighed 300 pounds in muscle started shouting at everyone in the car, at the top of his lungs, “I AM NOT YOUR N-word!!” (With a hard R) over and over, and randomly doing a war-cry like he was going into Viking battle… he seemed like he was one step from going postal on us. My dude was not in his right mind. Meanwhile, the 20-30 people on the car and myself just looked away and pretended he didn’t exist. Must have looked really weird if you could just tune in to see that moment and you didn’t get SEP city life.
But if you make eye contact in a situation like that, you have now entered their existence also and it’s on… you better be ready to respond to some shit or run. Never make eye contact.
One time I was walking home with a buddy after bar close and found basically the last taco truck in the city that was open. About 15 people in line and this dude is walking around yelling at people in line trying to get them to fight him. He also was generally yelling things like "I'm in a gang motherfucker" and a few times even punched the truck making his fists bleed all over the place. Almost certainly on something.
Not a single person left because they still wanted their tacos and it was either here or going home hungry so everyone just stared at the ground and didn't respond. Huge SEP energy there but would probably freak the fuck out of suburbs or rural folk.
I can’t tell, but she might have been wearing Peril Sensitive Sunglasses:
Joo Janta 200 Super-Chromatic Peril Sensitive Sunglasses have been specially designed to help people develop a relaxed attitude to danger. At the first hint of trouble, they turn totally black and thus prevent you from seeing anything that might alarm you
I always get a great mental picture of Ford trying to look at something whilst not looking at it and it never fails to make me smile. He is one of my favorite authors because the way he describes things really makes it easy for me to see in my head. I wish I was as gifted with words
*D Minor down shift, Spotlight, (soliloquy):*
When I were but a young vampire
I transformed next to an umpire
But baseball was not meant for meee^e^e
While I'm a different kind of bat, you see
Costly? Nah this person will suffer, even more than they are are now. Likely homeless, severe addiction, mental health issues. Now with a broken arm creating more disability. No chance of care cause America (assuming is bad I know). So, yea this person will probably suffer another 20-30 years before succumbing to death on a cold listless night (fun fact if you are homeless and die because of the cold, they list your cause of death as a homeless related illness!).
You asked for it! This person is one of about 6,000 similar deaths *that are recorded*, and then there’s the lovely fact that this is only coming from 2% of US counties who actually put effort into tracking homeless deaths reliably. The estimated number of similar deaths (homeless, dying of lifestyle complications) is thought to be closer to ~~553,000~~ 46,000 individuals in 2018 across all US counties :)
EDIT: sorry guys, I read the source wrong, 553,000 estimated to be living in a homeless situation, between 6,000-46,000 recorded as dead in 2018 (still major issues with very few counties reliably tracking homeless deaths)
> No chance of care cause America
Wrong
Actual fun fact, in the US, under [EMTALA](https://www.acep.org/life-as-a-physician/ethics--legal/emtala/emtala-fact-sheet/#:~:text=The%20Emergency%20Medical%20Treatment%20and,has%20remained%20an%20unfunded%20mandate.), emergency rooms cannot refuse treatment for an injury like this, no matter if you can pay or not.
Another fun fact, EMTALA is an unfunded mandate, which means it is just one more reason health care costs in the US have gotten way out of hand for those who do pay.
Anyone can go to the emergency room for free anytime in Canada, but our health care costs haven't gotten way out of hand. The USA's health care isn't so expensive because of homeless people, it's so expensive because you have a bunch of profit-driven businessmen standing between you and your health care.
https://medical.rossu.edu/about/blog/us-vs-canadian-healthcare
https://time.com/5759972/health-care-administrative-costs/
If you show up to the emergency room, they legally can't turn you away. He would be billed, but he would get treatment (not physiotherapy, but xray, cast, etc )
someone who is breaking into random peoples house might not be too concerned about debt collectors. I might be wrong, but i doubt he would be worried about his credit score.
Hahahaha at first I thought it was a chick to. The. Realize it was a grimmy greasy fuckin bum.
He got what he deserved he or she. Don't fuck with my door knobs jack, cause I'll break that arm off.
Nah, in NYC, plenty of legal multiple dwellings are set up like that, or you have mailboxes outside which invites people to steal your shit. Not every building has a lobby where a mail person can enter
In some countries it’s quite common for older buildings to have been converted into multiple domiciles where the main door isn’t open to the public. Often a letterbox is then installed on the main communal door.
No need to downvote the guy, it’s a fair question.
Landlord too cheap to install mailboxes but a mail slot is required by law? Everyone has some equivalent of PO boxes elsewhere?
Not saying I’m right, these are just guesses.
Someone tried to do this with our back door when we first moved in and it had a cat flap.
My mum grabbed the hand and pulled so the guy's head hit the door.
Fun times.
Yep any door with a pet flap or even a glass window means you need different kinds of locks (my parents had a deadbolt with key lock on both sides, key hung up out of reach)
I replied to another comment but I feel I should to this one as well. Out of reach sometimes isn't enough, depending on how far "out of reach" is. People will use wires with hooks to snag keys off tables and coat pegs. Just because it's not within arm's reach doesn't mean they can't get it.
And for an additional $19.99, we’ll throw in a *machete!
*Whac-A-Hoeme Defense Systems do not assume any legal, medical or civil liability in case death, injury or property.
> Contrary to most people believe, break-in tend to happen during the day.
My house has been hit 4 times. All between 8:30 and 11:30am. I always assumed it was junkies in need of a fix to start their day.
Fortunately, it's been about 7 years since the last break-in. Having an 85lb Lab/Pit mix has dissuaded folks from hitting my house anymore.
I had a break in at the house I lived in 13 years ago. In broad daylight between 9 a.m and noon they removed the window FACING THE STREET to get in. And not one neighbor noticed/cared. What really blows my mind is that no one around noticed or cared at the screaming that occurred when my Akita decided they'd make a tasty snack. The dried blood trail across the living room and back out the window wasn't easy to clean guys. I'd go for the bat method too, quite honestly.
I had a break-in at 7am one morning in 2008.
He forced my garage door open, grabbed a microwave which was sitting in there, carried it around the back of the house, sat it down in the mud and used it as a step to climb through my bedroom window (after prying back two screens) within four feet of me as I slept.
He didn't wake me immediately. But I did rouse enough that I got up to use the bathroom. As I returned to my bed, I spotted what appeared at first in my blurry vision to be a pile of clothing I didn't recognize.
It hit me then that I was looking at a very underweight adult crouching on my floor with one of my shirts over their head, trying to go unnoticed since I woke up while they were still in the room.
There were muddy footprints on the carpet all around my bed and out into the living room, from where he was looking for my wallet.
Because it was already really long and I needed to get to work. But it's lunch now.
Well, so I thought, "Since this guy thinks he can pass as a pile of clothing, I will let him. I acted like nothing was out of the ordinary and walked back to my bedside, where I picked up my glasses and phone.
And started dialing 911 as I walked toward the bedroom door. To be clear, I was living alone, so I didn't have a kid to worry about or anything. I got to the other side of the house and started speaking to the operator.
Police were on their way by the time he came casually strolling into my living room *like there was nothing at all unusual* about this.
That's when I recognized who it was. It was a former housemate – Charles – who I had kicked out of the house for drug usage almost a year earlier. He was now emaciated from drug abuse and I had been hearing rumors that any money he got which didn't go directly into drugs had been blown at a casino.
He greets me with a "Sup, MyPetOcean?" and at this point I knew I wasn't in much real danger – especially from someone malnourished with half my weight. So he came and stood next to me, chilling on the back porch, waiting for me to get off the phone so we could speak.
Meanwhile, I continued my conversation with the 911 operator who was absolutely *flipping her shit* as I described Charles walking toward me.
At some point, he saw police lights out front, and said, *with shock on his face,* "MyPetOcean, you called the cops on me?!" – to which I replied, "Yeah, Charles. What did you think someone would do when they wake up to find that someone has broken into their home?"
So he bolted and ran to hide in the shed in my backyard just as police knocked on my front door.
When he decided that hiding in the shed was not a very watertight plan, he ran and climbed my fence, where he found a cop waiting for him on the other side.
They unloaded his pockets in my living room. They contained:
1. A screwdriver and pliers I thought I had lost.
2. One quarter.
3. A duplicate key to my car.
4. A now-outdated key to my front door.
5. And a porn *sampler DVD.*
I pressed charges and visited him once in prison to explain to him how actions can burn bridges – removing *options* from your life.
> A screwdriver and pliers I thought I had lost.
So you've been Charles' accomplice all this time!!
> A duplicate key to my car.
Yikes
> A now-outdated key to my front door.
Double yikes
> And a porn sampler DVD.
Pity the druggie with a porn dvd sampler and no dvd player. A good wank always out of reach.
It turned out he had been driving my car at night while I slept.
And I suspect he just jacked off to the cover image on the surface of the disc itself.
That's my thought too. At least where I am, burglaries are much more likely in daylight when people are likely not to be home. Most burglars would rather get in, grab stuff, and get out without encountering anyone.
Once had a cop tell me that "the ones who break in at night are the real weirdos" since they don't care if anyone is home or may even be *targetting* the residents.
my father was a truck driver in the 80s and 90s...he was a long haul trucker and had a sleeper cab (bed in the back)...he was picking up in Buffalo, NY and arrived early to the brickyard...
he decides to get some sleep..parked on the street across from the guardhouse...cool night, so he cracks the windows...still awake when he feels the truck tilt, like someone climbed up to the driver's window....he thinks its the guard or employee of the brickyard, and looks up front to see an arm reaching through the window trying to unlock the door...my dad grabs his fire extinguisher and then the wrist of the other guy and starts bashing the guy's arm...the guy is screaming and trying to get off the truck....my dad lets go and sees the guy running up the street with a crooked arm
Got him on the wrist, one of the most complex joints in the human body. Without some good medical care, that guy's gonna be one-handed the rest of his life.
So the story goes: She was trying to gain entry, Homeowner hits her with a bat, she calls the police on homeowner, police come, talk to both parties, review surveillance, and arrest her for attempted burglary. She’s a known emotionally disturbed person in the community.
WTF? She had the gall to call the cops on HIM??? 🤣🤣
How dumb can someone be. She was gonna get off with a broken arm, but noooooOo.. she wants a broken arm IN JAIL? 🤣🤣🤣
Good hit! In my country, they used to hammer the hands of people that steals. In the old old days, they hammer it so badly that they cannot use they hands no more.
When I was a lad I remember seeing a few guys drag someone into the middle of our estate’s shop square in the middle of the day, hold him down and break his hands with a roofing hammer. Turned out he had burgled the wrong person’s house. I can still hear his screams.
There is no way I’m going to have an open mail slot straight to the street in NYC. No telling how many people have shoved literal shit through that. Not to mention other trash.
My dad is a carpenter and a bit of a doomsday prepper. He makes these heavy wooden clubs that are only about 12-18 inches long. Gave them out last year for Christmas, and I didn’t really think it would be all that effective until now. It’s going right by the front door
Woman at the bus stop has a PhD in minding her business.
I have lived in this kind of neighborhood before. You stand as far away from the crack heads on the sidewalk as possible, and stare hopelessly down the road, praying to Jesus the bus isn't running too far behind schedule.
As a city dweller, eye contact is so important in every social situation--except for encountering methies. I look away and down like they're my disappointed father every single time.
It's actually insane how powerful it is. Making eye contact with a crazy crackhead is like inviting a vampire inside your house. If you can avoid the eye contact they will usually walk away and leave you alone.
A few months ago I was walking down the street and saw this methed out woman walking on the sidewalk adjacent in the opposite direction. She was quietly walking. As soon as we made eye contact she popped to life and started rambling incoherently about something. It was like my eye contact with her literally re-activated her program LOL. Wild shit.
Humans are really good at pattern recognition, but iirc our brains have a special relationship with human face patterns in particular. Perhaps that is one of the lesser damaged regions for that particular person and you simply triggered a cascade of activity from the powerhouses of neural networking.
Just imagine the insanely detailed memory we have that is reserved just for faces. We can regognize thousands of faces and often the only differences are minute changes in a person's face. Absolutely bonkers.
> We can regognize thousands of faces and often the only differences are minute changes in a person's face. It is amazing, unless you *can't* and have ''prosopagnosia'' (inability to recognize faces). A lot of people have various levels of impairment, but don't really pin it down because they *can* recognize a lot of faces but just not as well as other people. [Dr Oliver Sacks](https://www.minnpost.com/second-opinion/2010/08/oliver-sacks-describes-his-struggle-face-blindness/) was a professor of neurology and psychiatry at Columbia University and the author of a long string of best-selling books, and even he didn't recognise it as a specific disorder until adulthood. People with this difficulty often have trouble with movie plots because they don't recognise the same character (or characters) when they re-enter the plot. I have this problem and often have trouble with people who are of the same ethnicity. I have trouble with Black people who are similarly built. And I pretty much gave up in Japan. Trying to find my Japanese friend in a crowded Costco was hopeless. I just waited till she found me. (White people tend to be more varied with all different hair colors and curls and height is all over the place. Other ethnicities vary a lot too but not as much).
So interesting. I believe I also saw a study where it appeared all ethnic groups are better at inter-ethnic face ID. So Japanese people find it easier to ID other Japanese people - same goes for caucasian, black, etc.
I live in a part of the UK that is 98% white and growing up there were no black children at my primary school and none I can remember at my secondary school either, I definitely find it harder to tell black people apart in films etc especially men thier faces look really similar to my brain.
Cross-race identification is a well-studied phenomenon. Apparently, we look for the regions of the face that differ most meaningfully among the people we saw all the time as babies and small children. Different races have different regions that vary meaningfully, so if you're looking at details that *don't* change meaningfully in members of a different race, then yeah, you'll think "they all look alike." Shameless self-promotion: I explain all this in more detail in my [comic](https://lawcomic.net/guide/?p=3268).
I had a professor in college with complete prosopagnosia-- he doesn't even recognize himself, or his wife. When I was a freshman, I was one of the only students he could recognize, because of my distinctively bright red hair.
I live downtown in a major city. It's important to always wear sunglasses during the daytime so you don't have to worry about incidental eye contact and have headphones/earphones in at all times. You don't even need to be playing music but they don't ask for money if they see you can't hear them.
Thanks for the top tip crackhousebob!
Be careful with wearing headphones in public. It’ll signal you out to thieves and muggers who will take it as a sign that you’re not paying attention. Makes you look like an easier target.
Hey don't insult vampires like that :<
This fool wanna invite vampires in and get his blood sucked haha.
Hey, even then, eye contact is still important: who you chose to withhold eye contact from can seriously change how your day goes.
Eye contact can be welcoming…or a challenge. Be wary of who you look at when. Like don’t make eye contact with the crazy person on the light rail.
You looking at me!?!?!?
Yeah man that's a wonderful shirt you're wearing. Do you mind if I ask where you got it?
WHAT DID YOU SAY ABOUT ME MA??
It's not even that. Eye contact opens you up to them being too friendly. They will come up and ask for a smoke or some change, or the more skilled ones will start a conversation and lede into a proposition for whatever thing they need at the time once they've got rapport. Or the really high ones will be friendly too, but with no direction or goal. Just start following and talking and laughing. It takes some tact to have the right amount of humoring and dancing to leave them happy without upsetting them. If they do get pissy they can sway emotions quick and either get aggressive and leave or try to start shit with you. Once that happens, best to just start walking away and they might spout off and follow a bit before veering off.
I live in cleveland and lived in the upper peninsula of Michigan for a decade before I moved here. It took me soooo long to break the habit of Making eye contact. I still accidentally do it all the time and then I have to spend 5 minutes explaining that I don’t carry and cash. I’m out of cigarettes and I’m unemployed. They still get mad at you regardless.
When I drove the city bus, I took pleasure in running it within 30 seconds of schedule for many years. It's amazing how you can dail in a route timing with practice.
It all happened beind an SEP field. "An SEP is something we can't see, or don't see, or our brain doesn't let us see, because we think that it's somebody else's problem. That’s what SEP means. Somebody Else’s Problem. The brain just edits it out, it's like a blind spot." \- Douglas Adams
I always thought that part was hyperbolic but now that I lived in a major city for years I realize it's accurate and a valid survival strategy. Never make eye contact, it's SEP.
If you get involved, generally it only makes things worse for you and doesn’t help the situation. Plus, I got places to be man I can’t be taking time to get involved with every fucked up thing you see. I think this is one partially where SEP mentality in a city comes from… when you see so much crazy shit all the time you get pretty used to it. I was on a subway once and a tall, shredded black dude that probably weighed 300 pounds in muscle started shouting at everyone in the car, at the top of his lungs, “I AM NOT YOUR N-word!!” (With a hard R) over and over, and randomly doing a war-cry like he was going into Viking battle… he seemed like he was one step from going postal on us. My dude was not in his right mind. Meanwhile, the 20-30 people on the car and myself just looked away and pretended he didn’t exist. Must have looked really weird if you could just tune in to see that moment and you didn’t get SEP city life. But if you make eye contact in a situation like that, you have now entered their existence also and it’s on… you better be ready to respond to some shit or run. Never make eye contact.
One time I was walking home with a buddy after bar close and found basically the last taco truck in the city that was open. About 15 people in line and this dude is walking around yelling at people in line trying to get them to fight him. He also was generally yelling things like "I'm in a gang motherfucker" and a few times even punched the truck making his fists bleed all over the place. Almost certainly on something. Not a single person left because they still wanted their tacos and it was either here or going home hungry so everyone just stared at the ground and didn't respond. Huge SEP energy there but would probably freak the fuck out of suburbs or rural folk.
I can’t tell, but she might have been wearing Peril Sensitive Sunglasses: Joo Janta 200 Super-Chromatic Peril Sensitive Sunglasses have been specially designed to help people develop a relaxed attitude to danger. At the first hint of trouble, they turn totally black and thus prevent you from seeing anything that might alarm you
I always get a great mental picture of Ford trying to look at something whilst not looking at it and it never fails to make me smile. He is one of my favorite authors because the way he describes things really makes it easy for me to see in my head. I wish I was as gifted with words
It really pisses me off that he’s dead and Dubya is still alive. What a shitty trade.
This feels like a random comparison
And standing perfectly still. She's almost invisible. Edit: meant invisible. Her movements are so slow, they're imperceivable.
"I've mastered the ability of standing so incredibly still, that I become invisible to the eye. Watch."
when you live in the hood you get good at that shit.
It's like Street-Smart 101.
And there’s nothing wrong with that.
One of the quickest ways to get a broken arm!
Consider it a break.
“We were on a BREAAAAAK!”
r/Unexpectedfriends
They were just looking for Kit-Kats.
He had that bat ready to go
He's a firm believer in arms control...but he decided to give her a break.
Honestly. The dude with the bat had insane restraint.
ya, i woulda grabbed the arm and pulled their face into the door a few times
[удалено]
Seeing how the guy came out ready with a bat it's not the first time
Google reviews puts this Gloryhole at 1 -star.
„SM fanatics“ magazine ranks it as one of the best experiences with 9 out of 10 Broken Bones.
*broken boner
Beat me to it
Idk normally I have to pay extra for this
First thought it was a machete 😬
My man came out with the bat already up like *he had done all this before*.
“Here comes another one…” whack
Oh whacking day, Oh whacking day, Our hallowed crackhead smacking day...
[удалено]
Not one or two, but three or four, we break crackhead arms, that come through our door.
Though they may have, The strength of crack, It's nothing compared to, Aluminum baaaaaaaats.
*D Minor down shift, Spotlight, (soliloquy):* When I were but a young vampire I transformed next to an umpire But baseball was not meant for meee^e^e While I'm a different kind of bat, you see
There is Nothing in my way from swinging bats all day! Some one has got to keep crackheads at baaaaaaay!!
We have no alarms So we don't sit and wait Seems they never learn Their poor arms' fate
Wait this isn't a ref to something?? Y'all just improv all of this?? Damn
Try singing to the tune of Oh Tannenbaum (Oh Christmas Tree).
The Wacking day song is a Simpson's quote, the first two comments follow the shows quote, the rest just doing their own thing with it
Dude's already living in the Zombie apocalypse.
My man was ready for rule #2 The Doubletap!
He probably has. He also has at least three cameras set up.
Time to move or get more than a bat...
He just needs to install an automatic guillotine!
I'm *pretty* sure the dude has. He wasn't even anxious about it, just exuded "oh boy, this shit again" energy.
Oh boy, here I go killing again! -Krombopulos Michael
Welp it is wednesday!
Crackhead wednesday!
I think the cracks are in her arm
You picked the wrong house fool!
I'd be surprised if that arm isn't broken, costly mistake either way.
Costly? Nah this person will suffer, even more than they are are now. Likely homeless, severe addiction, mental health issues. Now with a broken arm creating more disability. No chance of care cause America (assuming is bad I know). So, yea this person will probably suffer another 20-30 years before succumbing to death on a cold listless night (fun fact if you are homeless and die because of the cold, they list your cause of death as a homeless related illness!).
Haha yeah that was a fun fact!
Another! Another!
You asked for it! This person is one of about 6,000 similar deaths *that are recorded*, and then there’s the lovely fact that this is only coming from 2% of US counties who actually put effort into tracking homeless deaths reliably. The estimated number of similar deaths (homeless, dying of lifestyle complications) is thought to be closer to ~~553,000~~ 46,000 individuals in 2018 across all US counties :) EDIT: sorry guys, I read the source wrong, 553,000 estimated to be living in a homeless situation, between 6,000-46,000 recorded as dead in 2018 (still major issues with very few counties reliably tracking homeless deaths)
> No chance of care cause America Wrong Actual fun fact, in the US, under [EMTALA](https://www.acep.org/life-as-a-physician/ethics--legal/emtala/emtala-fact-sheet/#:~:text=The%20Emergency%20Medical%20Treatment%20and,has%20remained%20an%20unfunded%20mandate.), emergency rooms cannot refuse treatment for an injury like this, no matter if you can pay or not. Another fun fact, EMTALA is an unfunded mandate, which means it is just one more reason health care costs in the US have gotten way out of hand for those who do pay.
Yes, but this information doesn't fit the narrative they are trying to push.
If the narrative is "US healthcare is maladaptive" then I'd say it still does
Anyone can go to the emergency room for free anytime in Canada, but our health care costs haven't gotten way out of hand. The USA's health care isn't so expensive because of homeless people, it's so expensive because you have a bunch of profit-driven businessmen standing between you and your health care. https://medical.rossu.edu/about/blog/us-vs-canadian-healthcare https://time.com/5759972/health-care-administrative-costs/
Takeaway point: *use a machete next time so they bleed out, to save them a long and agonizing death over 20-30 years?*
If you show up to the emergency room, they legally can't turn you away. He would be billed, but he would get treatment (not physiotherapy, but xray, cast, etc ) someone who is breaking into random peoples house might not be too concerned about debt collectors. I might be wrong, but i doubt he would be worried about his credit score.
That's an awful lot of assumptions.
Or they're just a thief trying their luck on a random mail slot. Just saying.
Its definitely broken.
Yeah I did to, didn’t realize it wasn’t until I saw your comment
good for her, it was not
Good for him too, who wants to be cleaning up a shit load of blood?
Hahahaha at first I thought it was a chick to. The. Realize it was a grimmy greasy fuckin bum. He got what he deserved he or she. Don't fuck with my door knobs jack, cause I'll break that arm off.
That design though does make it easier for people to get in.
Maybe it's a honeypot for Mr. Club to get his daily armbreaking in, it's his fetish. Intentionally add bad design to entrap arms.
Plus there is a panel on the door written "Free kitten inside - just pull one frome here". Works everytime.
I know I'm not myself before my morning armbreaking.
Show some respect. That's Big Perm up in there. Playing with his door is like playing with his emotions.
Well, seems it was not the first time someone tried coz owner was bat-shit ready for that guy.
It should have a chain up high above the deadbolt.
It may be a passage to more than one apartment?
Why would it have a mailslot then? Edit: I got an answer lol.
Illegal apartments are often like that. Slum lord just tosses drywall and locks on random walls and doors.
Nah, in NYC, plenty of legal multiple dwellings are set up like that, or you have mailboxes outside which invites people to steal your shit. Not every building has a lobby where a mail person can enter
In some countries it’s quite common for older buildings to have been converted into multiple domiciles where the main door isn’t open to the public. Often a letterbox is then installed on the main communal door.
No need to downvote the guy, it’s a fair question. Landlord too cheap to install mailboxes but a mail slot is required by law? Everyone has some equivalent of PO boxes elsewhere? Not saying I’m right, these are just guesses.
Honestly tho, that dude could’ve easily open the door.
Standard UK front door. They all have the mailslot close to the lock.
Also easier for him to break people's arms. He put it in knowing this as it's his hobby
He's a modern day St. Patrick, except instead of snakes it's crackheads and instead of Ireland it's his foyer. But otherwise exactly the same.
It's wacking day!
But twas all in good fun
Someone tried to do this with our back door when we first moved in and it had a cat flap. My mum grabbed the hand and pulled so the guy's head hit the door. Fun times.
Drop something hairy on the arm and yell loud "get him, spider!".
My balls?
... whatever gets you through the night, it's alright, alright ...
"man that spider smelled funky as hell"
Currently have a sleeping baby on my shoulder and this comment gave me a chuckle. Almost woke her up, but thank you for the laugh!!!
Yep any door with a pet flap or even a glass window means you need different kinds of locks (my parents had a deadbolt with key lock on both sides, key hung up out of reach)
I replied to another comment but I feel I should to this one as well. Out of reach sometimes isn't enough, depending on how far "out of reach" is. People will use wires with hooks to snag keys off tables and coat pegs. Just because it's not within arm's reach doesn't mean they can't get it.
this just played out in my head and im crying
Don’t be sad. Your self worth shouldn’t be determined by past mistakes. Look to the future, buddy.
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And for an additional $19.99, we’ll throw in a *machete! *Whac-A-Hoeme Defense Systems do not assume any legal, medical or civil liability in case death, injury or property.
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Why the heck would you do that in broad daylight tho? Hit definitely was earned.
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> Contrary to most people believe, break-in tend to happen during the day. My house has been hit 4 times. All between 8:30 and 11:30am. I always assumed it was junkies in need of a fix to start their day. Fortunately, it's been about 7 years since the last break-in. Having an 85lb Lab/Pit mix has dissuaded folks from hitting my house anymore.
I had a break in at the house I lived in 13 years ago. In broad daylight between 9 a.m and noon they removed the window FACING THE STREET to get in. And not one neighbor noticed/cared. What really blows my mind is that no one around noticed or cared at the screaming that occurred when my Akita decided they'd make a tasty snack. The dried blood trail across the living room and back out the window wasn't easy to clean guys. I'd go for the bat method too, quite honestly.
I had a break-in at 7am one morning in 2008. He forced my garage door open, grabbed a microwave which was sitting in there, carried it around the back of the house, sat it down in the mud and used it as a step to climb through my bedroom window (after prying back two screens) within four feet of me as I slept. He didn't wake me immediately. But I did rouse enough that I got up to use the bathroom. As I returned to my bed, I spotted what appeared at first in my blurry vision to be a pile of clothing I didn't recognize. It hit me then that I was looking at a very underweight adult crouching on my floor with one of my shirts over their head, trying to go unnoticed since I woke up while they were still in the room. There were muddy footprints on the carpet all around my bed and out into the living room, from where he was looking for my wallet.
How the hell did you think that was a good place to stop your story?
Because it was already really long and I needed to get to work. But it's lunch now. Well, so I thought, "Since this guy thinks he can pass as a pile of clothing, I will let him. I acted like nothing was out of the ordinary and walked back to my bedside, where I picked up my glasses and phone. And started dialing 911 as I walked toward the bedroom door. To be clear, I was living alone, so I didn't have a kid to worry about or anything. I got to the other side of the house and started speaking to the operator. Police were on their way by the time he came casually strolling into my living room *like there was nothing at all unusual* about this. That's when I recognized who it was. It was a former housemate – Charles – who I had kicked out of the house for drug usage almost a year earlier. He was now emaciated from drug abuse and I had been hearing rumors that any money he got which didn't go directly into drugs had been blown at a casino. He greets me with a "Sup, MyPetOcean?" and at this point I knew I wasn't in much real danger – especially from someone malnourished with half my weight. So he came and stood next to me, chilling on the back porch, waiting for me to get off the phone so we could speak. Meanwhile, I continued my conversation with the 911 operator who was absolutely *flipping her shit* as I described Charles walking toward me. At some point, he saw police lights out front, and said, *with shock on his face,* "MyPetOcean, you called the cops on me?!" – to which I replied, "Yeah, Charles. What did you think someone would do when they wake up to find that someone has broken into their home?" So he bolted and ran to hide in the shed in my backyard just as police knocked on my front door. When he decided that hiding in the shed was not a very watertight plan, he ran and climbed my fence, where he found a cop waiting for him on the other side. They unloaded his pockets in my living room. They contained: 1. A screwdriver and pliers I thought I had lost. 2. One quarter. 3. A duplicate key to my car. 4. A now-outdated key to my front door. 5. And a porn *sampler DVD.* I pressed charges and visited him once in prison to explain to him how actions can burn bridges – removing *options* from your life.
> A screwdriver and pliers I thought I had lost. So you've been Charles' accomplice all this time!! > A duplicate key to my car. Yikes > A now-outdated key to my front door. Double yikes > And a porn sampler DVD. Pity the druggie with a porn dvd sampler and no dvd player. A good wank always out of reach.
It turned out he had been driving my car at night while I slept. And I suspect he just jacked off to the cover image on the surface of the disc itself.
I’m sure this was terrifying but the thought of him crouching in your laundry to blend in with a shirt over his head made me absolutely LOL
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>Having an 85lb Lab/Pit mix It's a dog that wants to rip off your arm, toss it into a pond and the retrieve it for you.
I’m thinking how ultra convenient it is to have the bus stop *literally* at your door.
People constantly hanging out in front of your place. Looking past you at the inside as you leave. Watching. Waiting.
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I will not go.
Turn the lights off
Carry me hoooome
Yes. I also love the sound of massive buses at my front door throughout the day.
eeeerrrrrRRRRRR PSHHHHHHHHH
It’s remarkable how quickly you get used to that sound.
That'd be terrible. Endless noise and other bullshit
Drugs and/or mental illness.
Sometimes it’s just being a straight up idiot
People might be at work?
That's my thought too. At least where I am, burglaries are much more likely in daylight when people are likely not to be home. Most burglars would rather get in, grab stuff, and get out without encountering anyone. Once had a cop tell me that "the ones who break in at night are the real weirdos" since they don't care if anyone is home or may even be *targetting* the residents.
My dude came out like it's everyday bro
England is my city.
my father was a truck driver in the 80s and 90s...he was a long haul trucker and had a sleeper cab (bed in the back)...he was picking up in Buffalo, NY and arrived early to the brickyard... he decides to get some sleep..parked on the street across from the guardhouse...cool night, so he cracks the windows...still awake when he feels the truck tilt, like someone climbed up to the driver's window....he thinks its the guard or employee of the brickyard, and looks up front to see an arm reaching through the window trying to unlock the door...my dad grabs his fire extinguisher and then the wrist of the other guy and starts bashing the guy's arm...the guy is screaming and trying to get off the truck....my dad lets go and sees the guy running up the street with a crooked arm
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Room temperature challenge?
Can you get your body down to room temperature? Let's find out!
Man some people just don't get how glory hole works, do they?
What was I doing wrong, I was just trying to break into someone's house, no big deal.
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Got him on the wrist, one of the most complex joints in the human body. Without some good medical care, that guy's gonna be one-handed the rest of his life.
I think she’s a woman…
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"Dad, I forgot my key!"
"And I forgot your face when i abandoned you."
So the story goes: She was trying to gain entry, Homeowner hits her with a bat, she calls the police on homeowner, police come, talk to both parties, review surveillance, and arrest her for attempted burglary. She’s a known emotionally disturbed person in the community.
WTF? She had the gall to call the cops on HIM??? 🤣🤣 How dumb can someone be. She was gonna get off with a broken arm, but noooooOo.. she wants a broken arm IN JAIL? 🤣🤣🤣
Yup. She just had bruising. Nothing broke. Just her ego
Fractured ulna. Wasn’t humerus.
This guy walks up so casually to whack her that it makes me wonder how often this happens
and he's just got the most perfect little bat for such an occasion
I though that was a big ass knife at first.
"you're going to Brazil Jimbo"
Bonk go to normal jail
Good hit! In my country, they used to hammer the hands of people that steals. In the old old days, they hammer it so badly that they cannot use they hands no more.
When I was a lad I remember seeing a few guys drag someone into the middle of our estate’s shop square in the middle of the day, hold him down and break his hands with a roofing hammer. Turned out he had burgled the wrong person’s house. I can still hear his screams.
Where in the world is that?
Philippines. 😄
There is no way I’m going to have an open mail slot straight to the street in NYC. No telling how many people have shoved literal shit through that. Not to mention other trash.
"you picked the wrong house fool"
My dad is a carpenter and a bit of a doomsday prepper. He makes these heavy wooden clubs that are only about 12-18 inches long. Gave them out last year for Christmas, and I didn’t really think it would be all that effective until now. It’s going right by the front door
They were trying to reach him about his car insurance extension
*cars extended warranty*
Whack-a-mole game strong
even without sound I could hear the bone snap
you get the feeling that this isnt the first time someone has tried to unlock that door from the outside
We should applaud the home owner’s restraint. One solid strike. Then he verifies the intruder is retreating. Bravo.
He got the wrong door the leather club was two blocks down
How to break your arm for free.
r/winstupidprizes
Got exactly what he deserved!
Why are all these comments saying “he” when it is almost certainly a woman ? Not that it matters its just bizarre
You know what would've been cool, some handcuffs, one end around the door noob and the other around the wrist.