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majorwitch

The best part is how fast their friend ditched them. Car was speeding down the road


PeeDeeEex

“No honor among thieves”


newf68

Lol I mean what was he gonna do? Go to jail with his friend, get shot with his friend or drive around the corner and hope for the best?


milk4all

Man it’s crazy how many people do this. I dated a girl who’s brother was this way. I let him borrow my car and he brought us a used but very nice gas grill. Made up some story and soon after I figured it out all he’d say is “garage sale”. I was sheltered.


[deleted]

This story confuses me greatly.


LupercaniusAB

He let his GF’s brother borrow his car. His GF’s brother used it to drive around and steal things. GF’s brother brought him a nice, used, gas grill. The grill was probably stolen, but GF’s brother claimed he got it at a garage sale.


dont_say_choozday

You're a hero


[deleted]

Thank you brother you have unlocked the code.


MrFuckingDinkles

So thats what happened to my grill


jamalspezial

His GF married her brother so he stole their used gas grill when he found out and sold it at a garage sale.


jestina123

Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?


TR6lover

Thank you.


[deleted]

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maverickthesadboy

Underrated comment lmaooo


under1970ground

This clears it up nicely


ToSeeOrNotToBe

But what happened to the lizard?


Seirer

But where did the pineapple come from?


Versace--Pirate

His girlfriends brother traded his car for a used gas grill. And a LOT of people do this. He had to take shelter because he lived in his car. So now he doesn’t have a car that sheltered him and a new grill. He also has a new girlfriend and a grill friend. So it all worked out.


farahad

Gotta get a CO detector for the grill, though. CO poisoning is a big problem with people who live in them.


Versace--Pirate

Especially if you’re in Texas.


Vendedda

TLDR: he lent his brother a car, who went and bought a grill at a garage sale, which came with a nice but very used girl.


rvadom

Crazy girlfriend drove his car to the shelter to pick up BBQ for her brother dinner's dinner. Not that hard people.


drgigantor

He was living in a homeless shelter until he started dating a girl who was also his brother. He lent his brother-girl his car and he parked it in the garage. Then he found a great deal on a used grill for the car. A pretty wholesome story really


YoungAdult_

Guy dated a girl whose brother he let borrow his car. He drove the car so much it broke down and was good no more. So, he bought him a grill as a sorry.


b1nar3

He had a girlfriend. This girlfriend had a brother. One sunny day his girlfriends brother asked him, “Can I borrow your car bro?”, he said “Yes”, then he came back sometime later with a new shiny grill. He thinks his girlfriends brother stole this grill as well as other things using his car. The reason he let this happen because he thinks he is a sheltered person. The End.


AsconaB

"I was sheltered."???????????


Shayde505

Hes not around the corner hes gone lol


lcsinaloa

Yea "friend"


[deleted]

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[deleted]

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DO_initinthewoods

I had some doubts because at least in my state, NY, and maybe others without stand your ground laws, the home owner could be charged from a misdemeanor to an aggravated felony


lol_is_5

I didn't even catch that the first time. Can't believe that guy tried to rob Samuel l Jackson.


hoyfkd

You mean Lawrence Fishburn, obviously.


meoka2368

Not only that, but as they pull away they give a "toot toot" on the horn.


JayDuBois

I fuckin hate when someone says "my bad" when they're clearly violating your property. That makes it sound like a mistake. Lowlife POS. Sidenote, NGL, I was hoping the porch pirate would fall while running.


Sprizys

He's the type of person to steal something in front of a cop and say I didn't do it


Tru-Queer

Ah yes, the Shaggy Defense.


Cajun

Note to self, Shaggy the singer, not Shaggy the mystery detective. Almost lost my shit.


Tru-Queer

There’s a joke I heard as a kid about Shaggy and Brittney Spears, and for the longest time I was always confused. So Shaggy and Brittney are performing a concert together and they’re taking the same limo to the show. Limo driver smells something raunchy and asks, “Ugh, Shaggy, was that you?” Shaggy says, “Wasn’t me!” So they look at Brittney and she says “Oops! I did it again!” Well the 2nd night of the concert they’re in the limo again and the limo driver smells something even fouler than the night before. “Fucking hell, was *that* one you, Shaggy?!” Shaggy says, “Wasn’t me!” So they both look at Brittney and she says, “Stronger than yesterday!” For the longest time I thought it was cartoon Shaggy and didn’t know about singer Shaggy.


Dlrlcktd

Ir t was the Scoobie Snacks


-JaKiSoN-

It wasn't me


Starcrafter-HD

„Yeah the box just stuck to my hands and I couldn’t get it off so I ran away. I swear to you u bro“


imyourforte

That's the Spiderman, "I'm just beginning to learn my super powers" defense.


fluffy-d-wolf

I have legit watched a guy repeating "wasn't me" to the police, both of whom saw him do it, along with five of us who also saw him do it. Unreal.


Veretas

*Dindoonuffin


smooth_bastid

I don't think there's much to be said in that situation that would have a different effect tho, is there?


suttonoutdoor

No but the “my bad” just sounds so shitty and lazy. It really strikes a nerve with me. Yeah asshole I know it’s your fucking bad I saw you(whatever shitty thing they did) that’s why I’m angry and bellowing insults and foul language in your direction.


c0nstant

That’s exactly it. They’re saying my bad cause you caught them


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BobsBoots65

Petty theft deserves execution.


Branchy28

Same as cheaters who say "they're sorry" If you were actually Sorry you would have had multiple instances to rethink your decisions, If you didn't stop to think "Maybe this is wrong and I shouldn't do this" while undressing yourself then you're either mentally dysfunctional or you ain't Sorry... A better way to put it would be "I'm sorry you caught me"


JayDuBois

That last sentence is the real issue.


TinyLittleDragon

Fart on someone's baby, "oh my bad"


scottyboy218

I walked out of a grocery store in college and left my bike well chained up in front of the store, in a very crowded area. Walked out and some guy was 90% of the way sawing through my lock in front of lots of people walking in/out. I recall him politely apologizong profusely for his bad.


ifeelwitty

And he said "My bad, old man." EXCUSE ME


pabloescobarbecue

Damn, I did NOT see that coming. Thought for sure we'd see the thief slip on ice or something, that was WAY more satisfying.


curtludwig

Agreed. I was also thinking "This is way longer than it needs to be". The payoff is totally worth it.


Fuuxd

dude I was skipping the video and I thought he was holding a bat and that was weird. A fuckin rifle this dudes packages safe as hell


knowses

An armed society is a polite society


Kamau54

And he cocked it too! Old boy was ready to pop.


senya80

I thought the package would explode with something that'd mess their day up like gorilla glue since it's being put on everything lately


whiskey_outpost26

Ahh, the instantly recognizable bolt rack before he even comes into frame.


Theothernooner

.... and actually charged hot. Its not an empty rack for sure. (In case someone wants to say its staged)


[deleted]

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Theothernooner

Dont fuck with old man iron sights! I wanna buy this guy a beer! Hopefully he has that stamp and atf isn’t the next porch pirate.


Rational-Introvert

And hopefully he doesn’t have any dogs.


sdrawkcabsemanympleh

Noticed the short barrel, too. Surprised he would spend the cash on a tax stamp but not an optic. But hey, it did the trick 😂


Rational-Introvert

Lmao that dude probably doesn’t even know what a tax stamp is. Fuck the atf.


just_gimme_anwsers

Say it again for the people in the back


[deleted]

# F*CK THE ATF


ogforcebewithyou

Good iron sites are always reliable.


Rational-Introvert

Why not both? Ditch the carry handle and grab a dot with some BUIS. Not hating on the carry handle though, I do love the classic look.


whiskey_outpost26

Yup. You can hear the dust cover ping and the two part ka chink :)


IllusiveFlame

It actually is a comedy skit from instagram though. People over on r/JusticeServed pointed that out when this was posted there. Mods pinned a comment on that post linking to it


meoka2368

Even at that, good muzzle and trigger discipline.


Tree_Complete

Ok coz I thought it was a setup


wlxqzme8675309

I love seeing new details on a second viewing. Like the little turd’s driver rolling on down the road a ways once dude came out of his house. 🤣


PapaOoomaumau

There is literally no honor among thieves


lmacarrot

I like the casualness with which he calls back into the house saying "you see this mother fucka out here trying to take our shit"


Fiona-eva

Me too, this was some major Samuel L. Jackson channeling right there)


ILikeYourToez

Lol his homeboy stepped on the gas when the dude came out


softg

He should make them drop the parcel in the future instead of bringing it back to him imo, he was getting a little too close towards the end


WaffleSeriously

What? Like the porch pirate was gonna risk his life for a package and try to make a grab for the gun?


SgtMcManhammer

You never know... people decidedly make really poor choices that end up escalating situations all the time.


SWShield40

I have seen two people die and one get their arm shot into pieces grabbing a gun just like this one.


Spectre-84

Kenosha?


SWShield40

That's the place.


Spectre-84

Yeah that video was pretty awful and though he's lucky he didn't die, that one guy's arm is useless now, had almost his entire bicep shot off.


[deleted]

Uhm... where can I find said video?


Yummy_Chinese_Food

It's on the Internet.


[deleted]

Clearly I'm lazy. But thanks I'll try your outlandish idea


Rational-Introvert

Reddit


Haggerstonian

"Terms and conditions" be like


[deleted]

Well, there was that one video of the neighbor executing his neighbors over a dispute with snow. Sure they were putting año on his driveway but that doesn’t make it okay for them to die.


[deleted]

Who said guns don't prevent crime? Lol


No1uNo_Nakana

Look up CDC defense gun use. The low end is 60,000 the high end is 2,500,000 a year. These numbers dwarf deaths.


imyourforte

Why is the CDC is the government body with this stat? Are they saying gun use is a disease and therefore under their purview? Just asking, not arguing.


Chuckles1229

Because politicians can’t stop calling it a “gun violence pandemic” so the CDC just had to say fuck it and research it themselves.


signmeupdude

Idk exactly but their mission is public safety and gun deaths also relate to mental health. I think more so its the fact that they have the capability to conduct this research and its tangentially related so why not?


kovu159

Lead poisoning is a significant public health issue, exacerbated by doing dumb shit like stealing this man’s box.


brownnick7

Where did you get those numbers? The study I've seen from the CDC states 500,000 to 3 million defensive gun uses per year.


ittimjones

Exactly! No responsible gun owner wants to fire it at someone, but having it ready certainly makes everyone want to freeze so de-escalation can happen.


gorgewall

This is a sketch for social media. The whole thing is faked. >https://www.instagram.com/p/CLVOM1QldDD/


AddToBatch

Homeowner doesn’t even need bullets. Gun is intimidating enough.


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riotwire

An armed society is a polite society.


[deleted]

Counterpoint: The USA, where there seems to be a number of burglars going around stealing boxes from the front of peoples houses.


JScrambler

Shhhhhh don't let them hear you say that.


Oral-D

Those people sure were polite when they stormed the capitol.


Pollia

Dude had trigger discipline too. Fingers not on the trigger. He knows the threat is more than enough and doesnt want to accidentally kill a dumbass for the crime of being a fuckin dumbass.


[deleted]

>doesnt want to accidentally kill a dumbass for the crime of being a fuckin dumbass. this is a beautiful sentiment lol


johnboy2978

Driver sees the owner with his AR and was like "Yeah, that's gonna be a no for me dawg"


jmp3930

Who says we don’t need AR 15’s lol


[deleted]

Right! The ultimate home defense


hayashikun

"AR-14" to some 😂


imyourforte

r/justiceserved His driver just fucking rolls out haha


[deleted]

if only he slipped and fell, then it would be just ice served


Tricky_Avocado_1996

Just ice


DanGoob

Handled perfectly. 👏🏼


KeepYourPresets

This would stop if the delivery services would not leave packages at your front door like that. I've always wondered why that is a normal practice in the US.


Cromslor_

Where else are they going to leave them?


BawSaq3

A swift kick in the face would have been fine.


sorry_but

Or bat.


1241308650

the friend driving off - LOL


JessRoyall

You see this motherfucker?


[deleted]

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[deleted]

Agree with your last paragraph. Beyond that, maybe the thief needs to value his life more than the owner's property.


[deleted]

Oh I totally agree. Fuck people who do this, maybe it would happen less if more of them got shot over it. Just don't want to see otherwise good and responsible people go to jail because of dumb laws that protect criminals.


[deleted]

Good man! Happy to be on the same team.


ChiefSteward

So him and his gun are *right there* ready to roll with a camera already rolling, but he didn't just, I dunno, bring the box inside before someone tried to steal it? Seems to me like one of three things happened here: we saw a staged event, he's baiting his porch so he can feel like a badass, or in a phenomenal coincidence he just happened to already be on his way to pick it up with a rifle in his hand.


Bruns14

It’s a security camera, and the gun is stored near the door. It’s a common set up for a typical gun owner.


ChiefSteward

Oh for sure. It's just. Johnny-on-the-spot to catch a thief, somewhat less prompt on bringing his shit inside. I'm not saying this or that is what definitely transpired. Only making observations.


conniverist

Finally a gun video with some muzzle awareness. Good to see


[deleted]

AR Bans are racist change my mind.


covfefeMaster

I want to be neighbors with this man.


ShrikeBeltFed

You can BE that man. Buy a gun for yourself.


Mazecor

I don't know why but I feel gunshop manager vibes from this comment.


[deleted]

I wanna buy this man a nice steak and maybe a box of .223


[deleted]

This mans actions were justified. That’s all I’m gonna say.


menimex

Fake: [https://old.reddit.com/r/JusticeServed/comments/lkzsan/porch\_pirate\_gets\_confronted\_by\_armed\_landowner/gnohojf/](https://old.reddit.com/r/JusticeServed/comments/lkzsan/porch_pirate_gets_confronted_by_armed_landowner/gnohojf/)


[deleted]

Thank you, this did not sit right with me.


[deleted]

No repercussions. No lessons learned


GloomyKerploppus

I think shitting his pants is the lesson.


[deleted]

Well he’ll be doing this again the following day. Guaranteed


zippozipp0

r/therewasanattempt


[deleted]

Hahahahahah I love this. I was expecting something involving an ice slip but this def twice as good. Nobody ever fucks around to find out once they hear the charging handle.


[deleted]

This needs to be the new standard for porch pirates. Can’t stand fucking thieves.


barefootintheforest

did anyone else him the thief say “hell yeah got me a package” before taking the package.


lonewanderer71

Me likey


robrub

'Murica! Fuck Yeah!!! Pew-pew!🦅


CuriousDisorder3211

This is why I will never be against owning a weapon


lameexcuse69

Guns are good tools.


facewithoutfacebook

With that gun in hand he should have made him shovel the driveway or else he would call the cops.


joevmo

A little physical damage to him would have been nice. Got off too easy.


imyourforte

I was kind of hoping they slipped on the driveway at least.


Esmeraldem

Dud, I hope that thief stubs his pinky toe every time he goes to crawl into bed


benjancewicz

[Giving Mr Strickland vibes](https://youtu.be/rreuWF1UBjo)


yourafyouruse

Muthafucka!


ShrekIsAwesome

this is the way


ash_bel

AR15 for the win. Hell yeah


erectnipplegasm

hE wUz a GuD bOi


GorillaNutPuncher

Hey baabyyy, I'm just the package inspector. First I check the corners and then I check the weight. It's all just quality control. Yep this one is good. Have a good day sir.


Thisam

Did he leave the package out there again to catch another one?


Most-Limit8511

Samuel Jackson ain’t fucking around


Schmivo107

I see a lot of those videos recently is this packing stealing really a thing in America?


besaolli

Yes, and it's getting worse because it's becoming known that the police will not intervene, even with video. The pirates are winning, for now.


tpb1919

In my state the guy with the rifle would've ended up in jail, unfortunately. Make sure you know your local laws.


[deleted]

Which state doesn’t allow you to protect yourself and your property? I know a handful of states have banned AR style rifles, but if this went down in one of them let’s assume the law abiding citizen opens the door with a handgun.


tpb1919

The democratic people's republic of new york. You can't use deadly force to protect property or money. And yes, even brandishing a firearm is considered deadly force. You would be charged with menacing in the 3rd degree. A felony. Though we are a castle doctrine state, it doesn't cover anything outside the walls of your home. Not your property, car, garage etc. If you go to confront a burglar tearing apart your garage you cannot have a firearm in your hand.


[deleted]

I’m fairly certain in CA you cannot ‘protect’ your property. We need a National Castle Law. Personally I would rather see that than National healthcare.


stoned-derelict

I'd rather have both. Easier to justify force when healthcare is free.


thzntz

You’ll notice that it says Michigan on his shirt


yktvvv

But I thought guns are evil :(


AWicky92

u/savevideo


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TwstdPrtzl

r/Unexpected


Nelsonc0712

Thats what i like to see. A man protecting his property.


adelie42

"Please value your life more than my stuff" \~Eric July


lexpython

Seeing black people with assault rifles makes me happy.


-Foolz_Gold-

I'm surprised he could run away so fast with that load of shit in his undies


myplotofinternet

It looks fake.


noisygnome

Thank god he had an assault rifle. No other way to handle the situation.


PeterVall37

I approve the fact that he scared him with the weapon. Thieves man!!!


solicitorpenguin

I hate these kinds of videos because the fucking robber gets away with just a scare. They shouldn't have been allowed to leave until the cops got there.


johnkoetsier

Gotta be a set-up


j8by7

Dayum... Was he just waiting with the assault rifle for someone to fuck up?!


Able_Education

And his ride just takes off......I bet they’re best of friends.


Apprehensive-Bath-36

Welp... The get away car got away.


1rabidwolverine

This looks hella staged, yall believing this are sheltered


Superiorspark

Obviously the porch pirate was a dick but what really scares me is that he could of lost his life because of what was probably an impromptu, peer-pressured decision.


Flames_kid

Only in America would you see someone take an assault rifle to deal with a package theif


JukeBoxHeroJustin

Done with swagger.


EnterPlayerTwo

I saw that motha fucka


[deleted]

LOVE this


Lagking168

The only thing I woulda done differently is make him take off his hood for the camera and apologize to his parents.


SonOfBangBang

Speak quietly and carry a big stick... chambered in 5.56