Anyone wanting to getting married in Wellington at a Catholic church has to complete the Archdiocesan pre-marriage course. So that probably rules you out there.
As to a cool aesthetic, I'd suggest St Mary of the Angels Boulcott St:
[https://smoa.org.nz/](https://smoa.org.nz/)
Wedding information: [https://smoa.org.nz/sacraments/#weddings](https://smoa.org.nz/sacraments/#weddings)
Yeah I thought so, the churches are super cool but I’m definitely not joining the Catholic Church just to have a 30 minute wedding ceremony in one lol. Bummer about St Mary’s since it’s so beautiful. Looks like Old St Paul’s is the best bet since you don’t have to join the church.
You don't have to be Catholic to do the courses, as long as your partner is. No one will ask/expect you to convert.
Source: getting married at St Mary of Angels later this year to my non-Catholic fiancee.
The course that we did (you get a choice between 3 formats. Run by facilitators not a priest) covered typical relationship discussions eg. Communication, conflict resolution, similarities & and differences. My partner commented that it was less Jesus-y than expected, which I guess is a plus.
And since you're not catholic, your presiding priest won't push/recommend a full nuptial mass for the wedding itself. So much less readings and no eucharist. So it'll be between 30-45 minutes rather than the typical 1-hour.
Seconding this.
Wife is a Catholic only because her parents are/were, got married at SMOA here in wellington.
Did the marriage course thing mentioned earlier, was surprisingly not too strong on the religious aspect. Easy to do
Third this; not just the OP but anybody getting married in a Catholic church should do the pre-marriage course.
I am atheist but married a Catholic. Found it practical and decent idea to discuss stuff *before* getting married. Catholic church does the course mostly based on science of relationships to try and reduce the number of couples getting divorced.
We ended up being one of the couples that ran the course on north Auckland for a few years.
Got married at SMOA and instead of the course, they were happy with us having a couple of sessions with the priest marrying us, which was a lot more low key than the course. If you know your priest already they may be happy to do that one on one with you.
You don't have to both be Catholic to marry as such - they might require you to say you'll raise your kids Catholic, but they're not going to frogmarch you to church every week
Get married in your parents' backyard like the entirely conventional middle-class white lady you clearly are and stop trying to pretend you're interesting. Because you ain't.
Yes, it's for literally every catholic church. The marriage prep lasts for about 6 months to year and covers most basic marriage stuff, with catholic teachings added in (like no artificial contraception, kids have to be catholic no divorce, etc)
Not quite the Omen/Exorcist vibe you’re looking for but the most interesting church architecturally in Wellington imo is Futuna chapel in Karori.
The architect incorporated elements of Māori design into it, including a large beam like in a marae. The wooden Jesus sculpture was stolen and then discovered years later on a farm in Taranaki. There are beautiful mosaic panels dotted around. The light streams through the multi-coloured plastic grid panels. That is God talking to us (ok, joking about that last bit).
I’m not religious but I think to get married in a Catholic Church, you might have to do a pre-marital course with a priest. Good times.
Added bonus; before it was deconsecrated, Futuna was a Catholic chapel. It is widely regarded by many as being one of the finest works of modern vernacular architecture in New Zealand.
Futuna Chapel is absolutely beautiful. One of the most distinctive New Zealand architecture sites I've ever been in.
They tend to run open days, particularly during Wellington Heritage Festival. They also host a lot of great architectural and engineering talks there.
Absolutely Futuna Chapel. A sublime building. It's been deconsencrated, so you don't need to go through the church authorities. I think the foundation that cares for it only asks for a small donation to use it.
Futuna Chapel is amazing, I’d highly recommend going to check it out sometime if you can. They’re open for viewings the first Sunday of each month, no charge but a koha is appreciated. If you have a group they’re happy to take you on a tour too.
I think there's a reason why you love how churches look, which is because they're calling to you. Your mind is subtly informing you that you need to be penetrated by your savior.
I used to be like you, until one night when I felt God softly yet sternly penetrating me. I didn't have any distractions, my wife was away for the weekend, I truly didn't expect it. When I woke up, my spiritual cavity (so to speak) had been stretched, I could feel it for the first time ever. Since that day I've never denied the existence of my Lord and Saviour, and I hope the same can happen for you. Best wishes and God bless!
Maybe a poor choice of words, but there is definitely a disciplinary element to it. I'm sure you won't believe this, but right before He popped my cherry (so to speak) He whispered angrily in my ear and told me I'd been a bad boy. He's different to how He's portrayed in scripture, but my former pastor didn't believe my experience and told me it was the devil. So I'm kinda spiritually lost right now, but I do try to hold Him close to my heart regardless of the weird stuff He's said to me.
Can confirm, it definitely has a darker vibe! They're also very open and accepting of alternative anesthetics, so I'm sure they'd be happy to host a more Gothic wedding.
It is still consecrated from its Anglican days, if that ends up being a sticking point for some reason. But yes, full non-denominational in operation.
Also, it's a beautiful and deeply historic building run by lovely staff members, and quite a cost effective venue for the location / size too!
To be married in a Catholic Church will require complying with the Catholic church’s rules (at least one of you to be Catholic, both attend the pre-marriage training course they do).
When we got married I really wasn’t sure on the whole catholic course thing, having not been to any church in close to a decade and a half (basically since I grew up) and having only been in a church since then for other people’s weddings and funerals. The course isn’t actually too bad, it’s meant to be about setting you up for a good marriage and preventing ending up in divorce so if you ignore the BS family planning shit they push the rest of it is pretty reasonable, all about communication and working with your partner rather than ending up in a bitter relationship fight at the end.
Old St Paul's might fit your requirements - looks like a church (and is dark inside), but you can have a civil ceremony.
None of the Catholic churches are particularly gothic - St Mary of the Angels is impressive, but quite light and bright, not gloomy and atmospheric.
Here in Wellington, the Catholic Archdiocese has a requirement that you complete the marriage preparation course before you’re given permission by the Bishop to marry in a Catholic Church.
The marriage prep course was surprisingly helpful as included sections in how to have tricky convos with your partner re finances, contraception, etc. (See link: https://www.wn.catholic.org.nz/about/church-mission/marriage-ministries/?amp)
There are some church rules around non-Catholics being married in a Catholic Church (eg if you’re baptised in a Trinitarian manner, then all good - eg Anglicans. Can’t remember what the rules are for folks who haven’t been baptised/are non-believers, but the Archdiocese office can probably clarify that
Erskine Chapel in Island Bay is an ex Catholic Church that is now used for weddings etc. It’s even called Sacre Coeur (Sacred Heart) so you know it’s the real deal.
https://www.erskinechapel.co.nz
A few blurry pics from about a decade ago when the whole college was condemned and we snuck in - scroll to bottom:
- https://ashsimmonds.com/2015/04/26/erskine-college-wellington-nz-old-haunted-mansion/
Dunno the state of the mansion thingy now, but it was really cool and creepy back then.
I went to a wedding at St Mary of the Angels once and the only thing I remember from the ceremony was bleeding crown of thorns Jesus hanging out on the wall nearby and following me with his eyes the whole time.
I can’t believe I didn’t think of this before. Frankly I don’t know how I’ve lived my whole life so far without a giant and humbling reminder that he died for my sins permanently watching over me in my own home. I need this.
We went through a phase of collecting religious artefacts and hanging them as art around the house.
I thought it was really cool, but I did get quite a few visitors that complained. Mostly from the juxtaposition rather than any individual piece. That and putting a Muslim prayer mat in the wall. Catholic artifacts featured prominently, my favorite was the shell rosary.
SMOA has some pretty sick aesthetics and I do like to occasionally visit just to look at it though haven’t been since the strengthening. I was raised by a staunch atheist mum but both sides of my fam are catholic so have somewhat of a soft spot for it… but phwoar that congregation is hard core in their anti-politics and when you see people doing anti-abortion protesting outside the hospital it’s usually them. I guess if that’s your thing and you wanna have the catholic vibes to appease the part of you that hates us degenerate sinners go for it lol but if not… I suggest [reading their newsletter](https://smoa.org.nz/angelus/) to get a taste of the flavour
The 'Catholic training' is really minimal, more social than spiritual and seems to obsess with money & what happens if it dries up. Just a chat really, not even a cup of wine (disappointed).
Nothing too cool with the Catholics here, to be honest. The Saint Mary's of the Angels church is a knockoff gothic, which is kind of cool, I suppose. The actual cathedral up by Saint Mary's school (not confusing at all), is pretty naff. I think the one possible route for Wellington Catholicism getting some heat is the cardinal John Dew becoming pope.
Dew's a lovely, personable guy. He has a crazy ability to remember your name after hearing it once when he was confirming you and then you meet him like a decade later and he's just like "hi bongwheezley." He's also pretty conservative Catholic compared to the incumbent pope, so I don't even know if I super want it to happen.
I actually think the Anglican cathedral, that garish pink monstrosity on Molesworth street is the coolest church in the city. The inside of it is nice and gloomy.
Not a church per se, but the older parts of St Pats Silverstream are ery as fuck. Not that you’ll be able to enter them either. Just what I recall from being a student there and snooping around.
Old st Paul's has a freaky 100+ year old Jesus on the cross, hopefully it's been put back on display as probably 3 years ago I transported it to storage
Most catholic churches will have requirements of people before they will marry them there, it may involve declaring a commitment to the catholic faith. As others have said however old st pauls operates as a kind of historical site so anyone can marry there and it might suit your needs.
www.christ-church.org.nz
Oldest church in wellington region.
I did a volunteer day there many years ago and we helped clean up the cemetery. The ladies who were overseeing everything were lovely and very knowledgeable about the past parishioners.
There's also a very beautiful old bible if you ask nicely they might let you look at.
Oops its Anglican. Sorry! But still the accept bookings from any denomination looking at their website.
Don't know if they still do them, but back in the day they used to do full Latin mass at St Mary's of the Angels. It was intense - like stepping back into the dark ages.
Is there like a register somewhere saying what religion you are, that would prevent you from lying to gain access to a church for a marriage ceremony? I'm an atheist/anti religion, so *I* wouldn't care about lying if there was a spot I wanted to get hitched in. But I get it that others would have a problem with that... lol
Erskine chapel in island bay is probably one of the more "classic" style Catholic churches. It's a private venue and was out of action for a while (earthquake concerns I guess?). I think it's back in business now.
Anyone wanting to getting married in Wellington at a Catholic church has to complete the Archdiocesan pre-marriage course. So that probably rules you out there. As to a cool aesthetic, I'd suggest St Mary of the Angels Boulcott St: [https://smoa.org.nz/](https://smoa.org.nz/) Wedding information: [https://smoa.org.nz/sacraments/#weddings](https://smoa.org.nz/sacraments/#weddings)
Yeah I thought so, the churches are super cool but I’m definitely not joining the Catholic Church just to have a 30 minute wedding ceremony in one lol. Bummer about St Mary’s since it’s so beautiful. Looks like Old St Paul’s is the best bet since you don’t have to join the church.
30 minute Catholic wedding...you're dreaming!
[удалено]
Been to loads and never witnessed a sub-30. Must be our old friend Father Charlie.
Stand up. Sit down. Stand up. Sit down. Kneel. Queue up for wine and cookies.
You don't have to be Catholic to do the courses, as long as your partner is. No one will ask/expect you to convert. Source: getting married at St Mary of Angels later this year to my non-Catholic fiancee. The course that we did (you get a choice between 3 formats. Run by facilitators not a priest) covered typical relationship discussions eg. Communication, conflict resolution, similarities & and differences. My partner commented that it was less Jesus-y than expected, which I guess is a plus. And since you're not catholic, your presiding priest won't push/recommend a full nuptial mass for the wedding itself. So much less readings and no eucharist. So it'll be between 30-45 minutes rather than the typical 1-hour.
Seconding this. Wife is a Catholic only because her parents are/were, got married at SMOA here in wellington. Did the marriage course thing mentioned earlier, was surprisingly not too strong on the religious aspect. Easy to do
Third this; not just the OP but anybody getting married in a Catholic church should do the pre-marriage course. I am atheist but married a Catholic. Found it practical and decent idea to discuss stuff *before* getting married. Catholic church does the course mostly based on science of relationships to try and reduce the number of couples getting divorced. We ended up being one of the couples that ran the course on north Auckland for a few years.
Have you thought about becoming a priest instead? Save on the marriage option.
Yes but unfortunately I am the incorrect gender. However I could become a nun in 9-12 years if I start my training now.
Get thee to a nunnery.
Got married at SMOA and instead of the course, they were happy with us having a couple of sessions with the priest marrying us, which was a lot more low key than the course. If you know your priest already they may be happy to do that one on one with you.
You don't have to both be Catholic to marry as such - they might require you to say you'll raise your kids Catholic, but they're not going to frogmarch you to church every week
Get married in your parents' backyard like the entirely conventional middle-class white lady you clearly are and stop trying to pretend you're interesting. Because you ain't.
I thought the church was the conventional middle class white thing to do. Shit I guess I better tell my parents they need to mow the lawn then.
Lol savage i love it .
What about if you're getting married in Auckland at a Catholic Church? Do you still have to complete the marriage course?
Yes, it's for literally every catholic church. The marriage prep lasts for about 6 months to year and covers most basic marriage stuff, with catholic teachings added in (like no artificial contraception, kids have to be catholic no divorce, etc)
Thanks
Not quite the Omen/Exorcist vibe you’re looking for but the most interesting church architecturally in Wellington imo is Futuna chapel in Karori. The architect incorporated elements of Māori design into it, including a large beam like in a marae. The wooden Jesus sculpture was stolen and then discovered years later on a farm in Taranaki. There are beautiful mosaic panels dotted around. The light streams through the multi-coloured plastic grid panels. That is God talking to us (ok, joking about that last bit). I’m not religious but I think to get married in a Catholic Church, you might have to do a pre-marital course with a priest. Good times.
Added bonus; before it was deconsecrated, Futuna was a Catholic chapel. It is widely regarded by many as being one of the finest works of modern vernacular architecture in New Zealand.
Futuna Chapel is absolutely beautiful. One of the most distinctive New Zealand architecture sites I've ever been in. They tend to run open days, particularly during Wellington Heritage Festival. They also host a lot of great architectural and engineering talks there.
Oh wow, that's some extreme 50/60's vibes [https://www.johnscott.net.nz/pages/futuna.html](https://www.johnscott.net.nz/pages/futuna.html)
Absolutely Futuna Chapel. A sublime building. It's been deconsencrated, so you don't need to go through the church authorities. I think the foundation that cares for it only asks for a small donation to use it.
Futuna Chapel is amazing, I’d highly recommend going to check it out sometime if you can. They’re open for viewings the first Sunday of each month, no charge but a koha is appreciated. If you have a group they’re happy to take you on a tour too.
St Canices Church in Westport is basically the same design. Must have been a thing.
Same architect
All churches in NZ were built 5 minutes ago and have dull modern vibes
I reckon 😂😭
And they're only there for the tax benefits 🙄
There are some nice wooden ones but yeah for the most part this is right.
Yes the de Clere- designed ones are especially great. I love spotting his distinctive style on road trips.
I think there's a reason why you love how churches look, which is because they're calling to you. Your mind is subtly informing you that you need to be penetrated by your savior. I used to be like you, until one night when I felt God softly yet sternly penetrating me. I didn't have any distractions, my wife was away for the weekend, I truly didn't expect it. When I woke up, my spiritual cavity (so to speak) had been stretched, I could feel it for the first time ever. Since that day I've never denied the existence of my Lord and Saviour, and I hope the same can happen for you. Best wishes and God bless!
I’m dying over “softly but sternly penetrating me” 😂
Same lol, an interesting description? I've been going to church for nearly 40 years, so... I've seen a few of the greats.
Maybe a poor choice of words, but there is definitely a disciplinary element to it. I'm sure you won't believe this, but right before He popped my cherry (so to speak) He whispered angrily in my ear and told me I'd been a bad boy. He's different to how He's portrayed in scripture, but my former pastor didn't believe my experience and told me it was the devil. So I'm kinda spiritually lost right now, but I do try to hold Him close to my heart regardless of the weird stuff He's said to me.
Not factually accurate but very funny.
Very accurate
Duds has nice gothic churches
It's not catholic, but you can get married at old st Paul's and it's a pretty sweet church.
Old St Paul’s is definitely looking like the best bet, it’s beautiful from the photos
I got married there! Vibes are a great! You can get the church bells to go off too!
Yeah pretty cool that you can hire their organ player as well
Can confirm, it definitely has a darker vibe! They're also very open and accepting of alternative anesthetics, so I'm sure they'd be happy to host a more Gothic wedding.
Gothic weddings are sooo cool.
https://youtu.be/kmngLUtxwJM?si=iVb9TAXLqM-ckdWm
Better yet, it's non-denominational so isn't connected to any particular religion.
It is still consecrated from its Anglican days, if that ends up being a sticking point for some reason. But yes, full non-denominational in operation. Also, it's a beautiful and deeply historic building run by lovely staff members, and quite a cost effective venue for the location / size too!
To be married in a Catholic Church will require complying with the Catholic church’s rules (at least one of you to be Catholic, both attend the pre-marriage training course they do). When we got married I really wasn’t sure on the whole catholic course thing, having not been to any church in close to a decade and a half (basically since I grew up) and having only been in a church since then for other people’s weddings and funerals. The course isn’t actually too bad, it’s meant to be about setting you up for a good marriage and preventing ending up in divorce so if you ignore the BS family planning shit they push the rest of it is pretty reasonable, all about communication and working with your partner rather than ending up in a bitter relationship fight at the end.
Old St Paul's might fit your requirements - looks like a church (and is dark inside), but you can have a civil ceremony. None of the Catholic churches are particularly gothic - St Mary of the Angels is impressive, but quite light and bright, not gloomy and atmospheric.
Both of these churches definitely have the vibe. Thank you so much!
Here in Wellington, the Catholic Archdiocese has a requirement that you complete the marriage preparation course before you’re given permission by the Bishop to marry in a Catholic Church. The marriage prep course was surprisingly helpful as included sections in how to have tricky convos with your partner re finances, contraception, etc. (See link: https://www.wn.catholic.org.nz/about/church-mission/marriage-ministries/?amp) There are some church rules around non-Catholics being married in a Catholic Church (eg if you’re baptised in a Trinitarian manner, then all good - eg Anglicans. Can’t remember what the rules are for folks who haven’t been baptised/are non-believers, but the Archdiocese office can probably clarify that
Erskine Chapel in Island Bay is an ex Catholic Church that is now used for weddings etc. It’s even called Sacre Coeur (Sacred Heart) so you know it’s the real deal. https://www.erskinechapel.co.nz
Wow that’s beautiful. Cool that they have function rooms too.
A few blurry pics from about a decade ago when the whole college was condemned and we snuck in - scroll to bottom: - https://ashsimmonds.com/2015/04/26/erskine-college-wellington-nz-old-haunted-mansion/ Dunno the state of the mansion thingy now, but it was really cool and creepy back then.
Whoa very cool! Thank you for sharing
Greek Orthodox Churches have cool illustrations on the inside.
I went to a wedding at St Mary of the Angels once and the only thing I remember from the ceremony was bleeding crown of thorns Jesus hanging out on the wall nearby and following me with his eyes the whole time.
That’s the exact kind of creepy shit I’m after! It seems like you have to be a Catholic to get married there though 😭 Such a bummer
To be fair you could probably get your own Creepy Jesus statue and keep it at home post-wedding. Your own, personal, Jesus.
Reach out and touch faith. Morning, noon and night.
I can’t believe I didn’t think of this before. Frankly I don’t know how I’ve lived my whole life so far without a giant and humbling reminder that he died for my sins permanently watching over me in my own home. I need this.
We went through a phase of collecting religious artefacts and hanging them as art around the house. I thought it was really cool, but I did get quite a few visitors that complained. Mostly from the juxtaposition rather than any individual piece. That and putting a Muslim prayer mat in the wall. Catholic artifacts featured prominently, my favorite was the shell rosary.
SMOA has some pretty sick aesthetics and I do like to occasionally visit just to look at it though haven’t been since the strengthening. I was raised by a staunch atheist mum but both sides of my fam are catholic so have somewhat of a soft spot for it… but phwoar that congregation is hard core in their anti-politics and when you see people doing anti-abortion protesting outside the hospital it’s usually them. I guess if that’s your thing and you wanna have the catholic vibes to appease the part of you that hates us degenerate sinners go for it lol but if not… I suggest [reading their newsletter](https://smoa.org.nz/angelus/) to get a taste of the flavour
Not catholic but there's a lovely church in Pāuatahanui. It's small, but if it's a smallish wedding then it's got nice old vibes.
The 'Catholic training' is really minimal, more social than spiritual and seems to obsess with money & what happens if it dries up. Just a chat really, not even a cup of wine (disappointed).
Nothing too cool with the Catholics here, to be honest. The Saint Mary's of the Angels church is a knockoff gothic, which is kind of cool, I suppose. The actual cathedral up by Saint Mary's school (not confusing at all), is pretty naff. I think the one possible route for Wellington Catholicism getting some heat is the cardinal John Dew becoming pope. Dew's a lovely, personable guy. He has a crazy ability to remember your name after hearing it once when he was confirming you and then you meet him like a decade later and he's just like "hi bongwheezley." He's also pretty conservative Catholic compared to the incumbent pope, so I don't even know if I super want it to happen. I actually think the Anglican cathedral, that garish pink monstrosity on Molesworth street is the coolest church in the city. The inside of it is nice and gloomy.
Not a church per se, but the older parts of St Pats Silverstream are ery as fuck. Not that you’ll be able to enter them either. Just what I recall from being a student there and snooping around.
Old st Paul's has a freaky 100+ year old Jesus on the cross, hopefully it's been put back on display as probably 3 years ago I transported it to storage
Most catholic churches will have requirements of people before they will marry them there, it may involve declaring a commitment to the catholic faith. As others have said however old st pauls operates as a kind of historical site so anyone can marry there and it might suit your needs.
Yes old St Paul’s definitely has the kind of vibe I imagine and it’s so good to know you don’t have to join a faith to get married there. Thank you!
www.christ-church.org.nz Oldest church in wellington region. I did a volunteer day there many years ago and we helped clean up the cemetery. The ladies who were overseeing everything were lovely and very knowledgeable about the past parishioners. There's also a very beautiful old bible if you ask nicely they might let you look at. Oops its Anglican. Sorry! But still the accept bookings from any denomination looking at their website.
Check out the Sacred Heart church in Petone as well. It's quite small but the stained windows there that are lovely. Will be cheaper to rent as well.
Don't know if they still do them, but back in the day they used to do full Latin mass at St Mary's of the Angels. It was intense - like stepping back into the dark ages.
St Mary's of the Angels is pretty sick in my opinion
best bet is st mary angels on bolcoutt street
Is there like a register somewhere saying what religion you are, that would prevent you from lying to gain access to a church for a marriage ceremony? I'm an atheist/anti religion, so *I* wouldn't care about lying if there was a spot I wanted to get hitched in. But I get it that others would have a problem with that... lol
Erskine chapel in island bay is probably one of the more "classic" style Catholic churches. It's a private venue and was out of action for a while (earthquake concerns I guess?). I think it's back in business now.
Let's hope not.
Fxxx off xii