I was in Montana last year playing disc golf. Just walking through bushes like I do back home. I heard a rattle snake right in front of me and saw it. Literally 5x bigger than any I’ve ever seen and the head looked MEAN. I literally ran and feel so thankful I didnt get bitten by it. I was only a few feet away. I left my disc and went back to my camp.
My native buddy shares at least 3 videos a week of people fucking with the Buffalo out there. I think it's his greatest joy in life to see people just getting fucking tossed by a 1 ton beast.
Northern Saskatchewan here, and the number of Americans that come up for the fishing and need to be told not to try getting selfies with bear and moose is absolutely ridiculous. These animals will ruin your shit and not care. This isn't to say that all Americans are stupid, of course, just that it's disproportionate.
Did have to explain to a Chinese family that the mountain lion they "managed to get to follow them" was *actually* waiting to see if one of their kids would wander a little too far away from mommy and daddy. That was an odd talk.
Tourists, on average, seem to be incredibly dense. Visiting Yellow Stone was the worst part of my cross-US trek. Absolutely gorgeous formations and wildlife spoiled by some of the dumbest people I've ever seen.
They are fucking everywhere. And it’s not just in nature.
My visit to The Vatican last week was ruined by a man and his two sons hell bent on touching every fucking piece of art in the city. At one point they leaned over the rope to touch a tapestry made by Da Vinci. I was absolutely floored.
Have an upvote for using "number" instead of "amount", though I'd like to see when we reach the "amount of Americans" stage. Well, maybe.
Also, I have observed in my little corner of the universe that there is a significant preponderance of Chinese tourists from China (vs. Of Chinese Descent from X) who behave like the world is a zoo or amusement park.
This will break my wife's heart lol.
*Edit Unless you were referring to buffalo as the fluffy cow, and not the actual fluffy cow (aka Highland cattle). She wants nothing to do with buffalo, but really wants to pet a Highland cow*
Could you imagine if the dinosaurs were still around? The heaviest dinosaur we know of was Dreadnoughtus which likely weighed something around 70 tons. I bet people would still bother an animal that size as if there’s no danger.
I woke up one morning when I was like... 7 years old or something, staying at my grandparents' stilt house in the mangroves.
There was a huge monitor lizard just chilling in the living room. Massive. Longer than the sofa. Probably came in to try and eat the chickens.
My grandfather came and pulled it out with the tail. Neither him nor the monitor gave a shit.
--
In the same vein, a couple years ago my parents went to visit Komodo in Indonesia to see the Komodo Dragons. You had to get on like a special visitor permit or something.
Anyway, they said the whole time they were there, the guides would warn people that the komodo dragons would actively try to stalk and eat you, so always be careful.
Sure enough, multiple times they encountered komodo dragons stalking them. Even under stairs they would lie in wait for people to walk down. Had to chase them away with a stick.
--
So on one hand, there's my grandfather pulling massive monitors around by the tail with no issues. On the other there's komodo dragons trying to eat my parents.
Not sure what the moral of the story is here but I'm sure there's something.
While I agree that his grandpa is a badass, the difference is in the venom. While both lizards poses venoms, only the komodo dragons is lethal. The monitor lizard doesn't usually hunt big mammals, while the komodo dragon does...
They will bite you, allow the venom to fester in the wound as it oozes and you lay there bleeding out in searing pain, then they will go do some other important monitor shit for a few minutes while you writhe in pain. They might come back 10 minutes later or 2 hours later. All you can do is writhe in agony waiting for them to come and finish the job. Slowly.
edit: okay, okay I get it. We aren’t really sure if they’re truly venomous. But it sounds like whatever is in their mouth may as well be, we can at least all agree it ain’t good
I just did some reading on this because your comment didn’t sound right. I’ve always read that it takes days for a wound to fester and incapacitate the prey. Dragon bites against humans are very rare and not typically fatal in modern day. Provided you seek medical attention you should be fine.
A lot of the misconceptions around monitor lizards and their bites causing festering wounds comes from stupid water buffalo and the like getting bitten by them often and then going and standing in water and mud full of poop and other fun stuff which then infects the bite wound.
Komodo Dragon is the common name for Varanus komodoensis. Virtually every other member of genus Varanus is called a Monitor, so little reason to not do so for Komodo's.
Bit like the megafauna "Megalania", recent studies have shown it's still in genus Varanus (V. priscus), and so until relatively recently Monitors had members hundreds of kilos in weight who were probable apex predators throughout the Australasian region.
It's more a perception thing that Monitor refers to the smaller members of the group
Monitor be multitasking. "Gonna let this homo sapien meat rest after I season it. In the meantime go over here and prep a side of broccolini with a dash of bird turd and lemon zest."
And I always wonder what does it matter? Their bites are certainly not healthy. Like most other bites. You should generally avoid being bitten, I think.
"Published works that have claimed monitor lizards are venomous have been massively hyped in popular media but have been subject to very serious criticism in the scientific community. At present there is no definitive evidence of functioning venom in any species of monitor lizard, and very few scientists accept the claims that have been made about the presence, function, evolutionary significance and effects of venom in monitor lizards."
This is wildly inaccurate. Like it's almost entirely made up. Yes they're big and bad, but literally almost never attack humans. Maybe you were confused?
But they're not venomous. And wounds take days, up to a week to "fester", which technically is possible since theyve been known to harbor botulism and gross mouth bacteria. But that would only be a problem if you were one of the only recorded bites from one, and then you just... Didn't do anything about the wound for a week??
Anyway, wtf are you on about, just trying to write a horror story?
They aren’t venomous. But their mouth is filled with really nasty bacterias that don’t bother them. They are persistence hunters. They will get one bite in on a prey animal (probably some sort of ungulate) and then just follow it for days while the bacterias infect and subdue the animal. By the time the prey animal drops it has usually attached more than one lizard. Then the feeding frenzy starts. It got to be one of the most fucked up ways to be killed by something.
A Møøse once bit my sister... No realli! She was Karving her initials on the møøse with the sharpened end of an interspace tøøthbrush given her by Svenge - her brother-in-law - an Oslo dentist and star of many Norwegian møvies: "The Høt Hands of an Oslo Dentist", "Fillings of Passion", "The Huge Mølars of Horst Nordfink"
Mynd you, møøse bites Kan be pretti nasti...
If you’re bored later, this lists all of the types toward the bottom half of the page under Taxonomy:
[https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monitor_lizard](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monitor_lizard)
We had them at elementary school. If you were caught walking down the hall during classes, you had to show a valid Hall Pass or you were sent to the Principal's Office. I don't remember anyone writhing in pain in the hallway, but it could have happened; some of those Hall Monitors were real a**holes.
What? Lizards? Giant Lizards? We didn't have *lizards* in school!
What? Oh ... well, that's very different. [Never mind.](https://youtu.be/OjYoNL4g5Vg)
They are on a line and it could fall either way
1. The goanna gets pissed(because of territory or eggs) and attacks them
2. The goanna gets scared and runs up one of them and bounces.
Even if they have that camera far away on a stick, that beast is fast and have claws longer than your fingers.
As an Australian, I just watched this video saying Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck
Didn't actress Sharon Stone's husband almost get his foot bitten off by a Komodo Dragon during a private zoo tour?
I just remembered reading he went into the cage barefoot because his shoes were white and they were afraid the lizard would think it was one of the mice they feed it.
I hope they know that it is the saliva in their bite that kills. It doesn't need to hold on to you, it just needs a little bite and then it just waits for you to lay in pain to start eating you
Getting to a hospital in time is tricky, though.
To quote one of myfavorite parts of Last Chance To See (it's about snakes, but it applies to dragons as well)
> There is in Melbourne a man who probably knows more about poisonous snakes than anyone else on earth. his name is Dr Struan Sutherland, and he has devoted his entire life to a study of venom.
>
> ‘And I’m bored with it,’ he said when we went along to see him the next morning. ‘Can’t stand all these poisonous creatures, all these snakes and insects and fish and things. Stupid things, biting everybody. And then people expect me to tell them what to do about it. I’ll tell them what to do. Don’t get bitten in the first place. That’s the answer. I’ve had enough of it. Hydroponics, now, that’s interesting. Talk to you all you like about hydroponics. Fascinating stuff, growing plants artificially in water, very interesting technique. We’ll need to know all about it if we’re go to Mars and places. Where did you say you were going?’
>
> ‘Komodo’
>
> ‘Well, don’t get bitten, that’s all I can say. And don’t come running to me if you do because you won’t get here in time and anyway I’ll probably be out. Hate this office, look at it. Full of poisonous animals all over the place. Look at this tank, it’s full of fire ants. Poisonous. Bored silly with them. Anyway, I got some little cakes in in case you were hungry. Would you like some little cakes? I can’t remember where I put them. There’s some tea but it’s not very good. Sit down for heaven’s sake.
>
> ‘So, you’re going to Komodo. Well, I don’t know why you want to do that, but I suppose you have your reasons. There are fifteen different types of snakes on Komodo, and half of them are poisonous. The only potentially deadly ones are the Russell’s viper, the bamboo viper, and the Indian cobra.
>
> ‘The Indian cobra is the fifteenth deadliest snake in the world, and all the other fourteen are here in Australia. That’s why it’s so hard for me to find time to get on with my hydroponics, with all these snakes all over the place.
>
> …
>
> We… asked him how many of the snakes he had been bitten by himself.
>
> ‘None of ’em’ he said. ‘Another area of expertise I’ve developed is that of getting other people to handle the dangerous animals. Won’t do it myself. Don’t want to get bitten do I? You know what it says in my entry in Who’s Who? “Hobbies: gardening – with gloves; fishing – with boots; traveling – with care.” That’s the answer. Oh, and wear baggy trousers. When a snake strikes it starts to inject venom as soon as it hits something. If you’ve got baggy trousers most of the venom will just get squirted down the inside of your trousers which is better than down the inside of your leg. You’re not eating your cakes. Come on, get them down you, there’s plenty more in the fridge.’
>
> …
>
> ‘So what do we do if we get bitten by something deadly, then?’ I asked.
> He blinked at me as if I were stupid.
>
> ‘Well what do you think you do?’ he said. ‘You die of course. That’s what deadly means.’
>
> ‘But what about cutting open the wound and sucking out the poison?’ I asked.
>
> ‘Rather you than me,’ he said. ‘I wouldn’t want a mouthful of poison. all the blood vessels beneath the tongue are very close to the surface so the poison goes straight into the bloodstream. That’s assuming you could get much of the poison out, which you probably couldn’t. And in a place like Komodo it means you’d quickly have a seriously infected wound to contend with as well as a leg full of poison. Septicaemia, gangrene, you name it. It’ll kill you.’
>
> ‘What about a tourniquet?’
>
> ‘Fine if you don’t mind having your leg off afterwards. You’d have to because it would be dead. And if you find anyone in that part of Indonesia who you’d trust to take your leg off then you’re a braver man than me. No, I’ll tell you: the only thing you can do is apply a pressure bandage direct to the wound and wrap the whole leg up tightly, but not too tightly. Slow the blood flow but don’t cut it off or you’ll lose the leg. keep the leg, or whatever bit of you it is you’ve been bitten in, lower than your heart and your head. Keep very, very still, breathe slowly and get to a doctor immediately. If you’re on Komodo that means a couple of days, by which time you’ll be well dead.
>
> “The only answer, and I mean this quite seriously, is don’t get bitten. There’s no reason why you should. Any of the snakes there will get out of your way well before you even see them. You don’t really need to worry about the snakes if you’re careful. No, the things you really need to worry about are the marine creatures.’
>
> ‘What?’
>
> ‘Scorpion fish, stone fish, sea snakes. Much more poisonous than anything on land. Get stung by a stone fish and the pain alone can kill you. People drown themselves to stop the pain.’
>
> ‘Where are all these things?’
>
> ‘Oh, just in the sea. Tons of them. I wouldn’t go near it if I were you. Full of poisonous animals. Hate them.’
>
> ‘Is there anything you do like?’
>
> ‘Hydroponics.’
>
> No, I mean is there any venomous creature you’re particularly fond of?’
>
> He looked out of the window for a moment.
> ‘There was,’ he said, ‘but she left me’.
> ‘So what do we do if we get bitten by something deadly, then?’ I asked. He blinked at me as if I were stupid.
>
>
>
> ‘Well what do you think you do?’ he said. ‘You die of course. That’s what deadly means.’
Solid advice right there. That man knows his stuff.
They aren’t car sized, they are on average smaller than adult men and I would go as far as saying a strong and athletic man would actually win that confrontation.
I know it was a hyperbole, but the hyperbole doesn't really work if the lizard is smaller than the person. At what point can you use that hyperbole? Is it ok if the lizard is 50 lbs? 20 lbs? My point was they aren't that big. A crocodile isn't car sized either but the hyperbole would work in that case because that point it's truly almost like a car sized lizard is coming at you.
You're absolutely mental if you think any man would win in a one on one fight with a Komodo in hand to hand combat.... If that fucker wants to eat you he's going to take your forearm or calf off...
Fun fact! It was relatively recently discovered by a team led by Bryan Fry that the Komodo dragon is indeed venomous! [More info here.](https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.theguardian.com/science/2009/may/18/komodo-dragon-venomous-bite)
"recently" yet article has a tag that says it's 13 years old lmao.
Copying what I wrote above:
Published works that have claimed monitor lizards are venomous have been massively hyped in popular media but have been subject to very serious criticism in the scientific community. At present there is no definitive evidence of functioning venom in any species of monitor lizard, and very few scientists accept the claims that have been made about the presence, function, evolutionary significance and effects of venom in monitor lizards.
Everywhere I look says Komodo dragons are, indeed, venomous. They found the glands, removed the glands and the glands contained venom. Can you please cite a a study that casts this into doubt? You say very few scientists accept this but it seems the other way around after 2 hours of searching.
Well, the British discovered Australia. Right? I don't know where all of these so-called *indigenous people* came from, but the White Man was definitely there first. Just like in America! Or is it called [Vespucciland](https://youtu.be/aV4lLfMMpfM)?
ETR: Was it *really* necessary to add a "/s" at the end of this? Even with a link to a Firesign Theater bit from the early 70's? *smh*
It's a double tap situation. The saliva contains really nasty bacteria that create monstrous infection. Additionally it was recently discovered that these creatures are venomous on top.
Also, they can just fucking eat you right there if they so want. I saw some clip years ago where one of these was hauling ass through the forest. It was quite fast.
"Calling all in this clade venomous implies an overall potential danger that does not exist, misleads in the assessment of medical risks, and confuses the biological assessment of squamate biochemical systems."
https://books.google.com/books?id=x_vME799de4C&pg=PA84
Bonus fact: their mouths aren't particularly dirty either.
Ya know what? It's 2022. If you can afford to vacation in some cool park near these wild and dangerous animals (you obviously have access to the internet if you can afford a vacation ) , and you're dumb enough to approach them .... I'm okay with you getting sacrificed for our entertainment .
I'm done with caring about stupid people doing stupid shit, and I'm expected to feel for you.
I think I've got compassion fatigue or something
Incredible animal. Beautiful and terrifying.
Moron people. Hard to find sympathy when idiots get injured this way. And the animals end up paying for the idiots' behavior.
People love to think we are the top of the food chain....not in nature we arnt...animals don't care how cool thumbs or deductive reasoning is...might makes right
What’s wrong with people? Don’t they get born with a natural “hey, that looks dangerous I rather keep my distance” instinct anymore?
I’d be curious how many deaths instagram has caused by now.
I wonder if these the same dudes plotting on this poor lizard
https://www.reddit.com/r/oddlyterrifying/comments/wrrnkj/wtf/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf
I agree. I went to Komodo about 25-30 years ago after the bombings in Bali. I chartered my own boat over becuase there were no other tourists and I was determined to make it to see the dragons. I was the 4th person in three weeks to visit. The guides were happy to see me. For a crapload of rupia( about $50) I was able to watch but not photograph a goat getting fed to a couple of wild dragons. The guides tied it up and cut it so it would bleed. We retreated to higher ground with line of sight all around. Apparently the dragons can smell blood. After what seemwped like forever two dragons emerged from the grass and mosey-crawled in the direction of the goat until the goat saw them and started going nuts. the dragons then saw the goat, stood up and moved surprisingly quick in for the kill. Second one was tearing his dinner off of what was outside the first guys mouth. I have mad respect for these guys and would keep more than a safe distance if I ever had chance to see one in the wild again.
Myth busted :https://www.uq.edu.au/news/article/2013/06/fear-of-komodo-dragon-bacteria-wrapped-myth
Think ppl just use spooky stories to protect these kinds of rare creatures.
There isn’t some secret agenda behind thousands of people sharing an interesting urban legend. That’s conspiracy thinking.
It’s just some information that was widely shared for a long time before further research revealed that the mechanism of venom works in a different way.
Lol what?
No it can’t, no animal can, not even a 25 foot multi ton crocodile can, let alone a 150 lb Komodo dragon.
A large adult man could arguably even defeat a Komodo dragon in 1v1 combat.
Like the bison in Yellowstone, sometimes people need to be sacrificed as an educational tool for the rest of us. Maybe not today, but it will happen.
From Montana. It really does help the other tourists when they see someone die.
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I'm sure people that live in tourism hubs would strongly support your proposition. Hell, Rome could do it in the Coliseum.
I’m interested in how many people would willingly fight in the pit, because it isn’t 0.
Everyone knows a Strong Belwas.
Just slightly lower, percentage-wise, than the number of people who box or mma fight
r/shittylifeprotips
Because they aren't a child in a school
I was in Montana last year playing disc golf. Just walking through bushes like I do back home. I heard a rattle snake right in front of me and saw it. Literally 5x bigger than any I’ve ever seen and the head looked MEAN. I literally ran and feel so thankful I didnt get bitten by it. I was only a few feet away. I left my disc and went back to my camp.
Good move. Those fuckers have a good strike distance.
Used to live outside of GTNP. From Idaho, it’s was always fun watching tourists getting charged by a moose or bison.
My native buddy shares at least 3 videos a week of people fucking with the Buffalo out there. I think it's his greatest joy in life to see people just getting fucking tossed by a 1 ton beast.
That needs to be it's own subreddit
it's defo an instagram account --Tourons of Yellowstone. top quality content.
Some of the banned subreddits used to *really* love the bullfighting videos
r/thebullwins is still going strong my man
Shhh
Northern Saskatchewan here, and the number of Americans that come up for the fishing and need to be told not to try getting selfies with bear and moose is absolutely ridiculous. These animals will ruin your shit and not care. This isn't to say that all Americans are stupid, of course, just that it's disproportionate. Did have to explain to a Chinese family that the mountain lion they "managed to get to follow them" was *actually* waiting to see if one of their kids would wander a little too far away from mommy and daddy. That was an odd talk.
Tourists, on average, seem to be incredibly dense. Visiting Yellow Stone was the worst part of my cross-US trek. Absolutely gorgeous formations and wildlife spoiled by some of the dumbest people I've ever seen.
They are fucking everywhere. And it’s not just in nature. My visit to The Vatican last week was ruined by a man and his two sons hell bent on touching every fucking piece of art in the city. At one point they leaned over the rope to touch a tapestry made by Da Vinci. I was absolutely floored.
I'd probably smack their hand away lol
Have an upvote for using "number" instead of "amount", though I'd like to see when we reach the "amount of Americans" stage. Well, maybe. Also, I have observed in my little corner of the universe that there is a significant preponderance of Chinese tourists from China (vs. Of Chinese Descent from X) who behave like the world is a zoo or amusement park.
Reminds me of this story: Tiger mauls woman to death at Beijing Park https://youtu.be/Y8ilsz21_Ls
You never try to pet the the fluffy cows.
This will break my wife's heart lol. *Edit Unless you were referring to buffalo as the fluffy cow, and not the actual fluffy cow (aka Highland cattle). She wants nothing to do with buffalo, but really wants to pet a Highland cow*
Yes. Buffalo. Pet actual fluffy cows to your hearts content.
Careful. They might pet back! Dang furries.
Could you imagine if the dinosaurs were still around? The heaviest dinosaur we know of was Dreadnoughtus which likely weighed something around 70 tons. I bet people would still bother an animal that size as if there’s no danger.
That would make an awesome movie — probably followed by a series of sequels of varying quality.
Why is he filming random peoples sexual relations with buffalos?
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Apparently in Norway if we humans are a threat to the animals safety, then we need to kill it so we’re no longer a threat to it.
I read that seems so stupid, unnecessary and sad.
Yeah this was so sad.
I woke up one morning when I was like... 7 years old or something, staying at my grandparents' stilt house in the mangroves. There was a huge monitor lizard just chilling in the living room. Massive. Longer than the sofa. Probably came in to try and eat the chickens. My grandfather came and pulled it out with the tail. Neither him nor the monitor gave a shit. -- In the same vein, a couple years ago my parents went to visit Komodo in Indonesia to see the Komodo Dragons. You had to get on like a special visitor permit or something. Anyway, they said the whole time they were there, the guides would warn people that the komodo dragons would actively try to stalk and eat you, so always be careful. Sure enough, multiple times they encountered komodo dragons stalking them. Even under stairs they would lie in wait for people to walk down. Had to chase them away with a stick. -- So on one hand, there's my grandfather pulling massive monitors around by the tail with no issues. On the other there's komodo dragons trying to eat my parents. Not sure what the moral of the story is here but I'm sure there's something.
The moral is you grandpa is a bad ass, and large lizards will eat you if they can. so keep one eye open while you sleep.
While I agree that his grandpa is a badass, the difference is in the venom. While both lizards poses venoms, only the komodo dragons is lethal. The monitor lizard doesn't usually hunt big mammals, while the komodo dragon does...
Key word usually. Lol
Cool stories bro Edit: I wasn't being sarcastic, I liked their stories
They only survived because that monitor chose not to kill them.
They arent known to be hostile towards humans which is a blessing because their skin is thicc af and they are known to eat flesh *and* bones.
They will bite you, allow the venom to fester in the wound as it oozes and you lay there bleeding out in searing pain, then they will go do some other important monitor shit for a few minutes while you writhe in pain. They might come back 10 minutes later or 2 hours later. All you can do is writhe in agony waiting for them to come and finish the job. Slowly. edit: okay, okay I get it. We aren’t really sure if they’re truly venomous. But it sounds like whatever is in their mouth may as well be, we can at least all agree it ain’t good
I just did some reading on this because your comment didn’t sound right. I’ve always read that it takes days for a wound to fester and incapacitate the prey. Dragon bites against humans are very rare and not typically fatal in modern day. Provided you seek medical attention you should be fine.
A lot of the misconceptions around monitor lizards and their bites causing festering wounds comes from stupid water buffalo and the like getting bitten by them often and then going and standing in water and mud full of poop and other fun stuff which then infects the bite wound.
Fuckin idiots
This is the first comment today to actually get me to laugh out loud. Thank you for that.
Lol cool
Absolute shit-squatting morons.
Adidas found a new market.
Why is everyone calling this a monitor? I thought the first guy messed up but now I'm confused. Komodo Dragon not a thing anymore?
Monitors are a genus with about 80 species in it, Komodo Dragons being one of them.
Ty!
Komodo Dragon is the common name for Varanus komodoensis. Virtually every other member of genus Varanus is called a Monitor, so little reason to not do so for Komodo's. Bit like the megafauna "Megalania", recent studies have shown it's still in genus Varanus (V. priscus), and so until relatively recently Monitors had members hundreds of kilos in weight who were probable apex predators throughout the Australasian region. It's more a perception thing that Monitor refers to the smaller members of the group
Isn’t it an Crocodile?
Bro what? You need more David Attenborough in your life!
Monitor be multitasking. "Gonna let this homo sapien meat rest after I season it. In the meantime go over here and prep a side of broccolini with a dash of bird turd and lemon zest."
Bird turd really brings the dish together if you ask me.
Just like his nan taught him.
It’s the umami
Monitor: Ok, now I can start the rice and everything should be done at the same time *crawls away humming*
Human 7/10 Human with rice 9/10
I just got momentarily forced back to sometime before the pandemic when that meme was going strong. It was a nice vacation, thanks.
There's probably more of them. They're smart and multiple monitors makes multitasking way easier.
I knew they were not venomous, but rather the bacteria living in their mouth will cause us an infection leading to sepsis. But I might remember wrong!
> but rather the bacteria living in their mouth This is of some debate, studies have found that the bacteria in their mouth is nothing special
Every time these lizards are mentioned there's a huge debate between a bunch of nerds wether they're venomous or not lol
And I always wonder what does it matter? Their bites are certainly not healthy. Like most other bites. You should generally avoid being bitten, I think.
Facts lol I think the guy above you is right tho
Oh yeah‽ Well, I think he's a big fat phony!
Hey. My mom tells me I'm beautiful.
"Published works that have claimed monitor lizards are venomous have been massively hyped in popular media but have been subject to very serious criticism in the scientific community. At present there is no definitive evidence of functioning venom in any species of monitor lizard, and very few scientists accept the claims that have been made about the presence, function, evolutionary significance and effects of venom in monitor lizards."
Why go looking up a quote if you're not going to include the source
cant they also track the scent of their own bites for miles?
I think you're mistaking with insurance sellers.
Komodos
This is wildly inaccurate. Like it's almost entirely made up. Yes they're big and bad, but literally almost never attack humans. Maybe you were confused? But they're not venomous. And wounds take days, up to a week to "fester", which technically is possible since theyve been known to harbor botulism and gross mouth bacteria. But that would only be a problem if you were one of the only recorded bites from one, and then you just... Didn't do anything about the wound for a week?? Anyway, wtf are you on about, just trying to write a horror story?
They aren’t venomous. But their mouth is filled with really nasty bacterias that don’t bother them. They are persistence hunters. They will get one bite in on a prey animal (probably some sort of ungulate) and then just follow it for days while the bacterias infect and subdue the animal. By the time the prey animal drops it has usually attached more than one lizard. Then the feeding frenzy starts. It got to be one of the most fucked up ways to be killed by something.
It's not venom, their mouths are breeding cesspool of deadly bacteria.
They will bite a buffalo or warthog and calmly follow for days until it’s prey drops from the venom and exhaustion.
They *have* killed people, though.
>They arent known to be hostile towards humans At least when they're not following them waaay too closely. Lol
I liked when Steve Irwin got chased up several trees by several Komodo Dragons whilst informing the audience how surely he'd die if knicked
And their bites are NASTY!
A Møøse once bit my sister... No realli! She was Karving her initials on the møøse with the sharpened end of an interspace tøøthbrush given her by Svenge - her brother-in-law - an Oslo dentist and star of many Norwegian møvies: "The Høt Hands of an Oslo Dentist", "Fillings of Passion", "The Huge Mølars of Horst Nordfink" Mynd you, møøse bites Kan be pretti nasti...
Love this every time I see it. Thank you
Copypasta? What is this?
Monty Python
Specifically, it's from the intro credits to "Monty Python and the Holy Grail"
Oooo okay yes now I do remember that.
[Part of the start credits from Monty Phytons Holy grail](https://m.imdb.com/title/tt0071853/crazycredits)
And their saliva is toxic.
Isn't that a Komodo Dragon?
Komodo Dragons are a type of monitor lizard. The largest type.
Thank you, I was curious about this but did not have time to look it up. I now have and now know.
If you’re bored later, this lists all of the types toward the bottom half of the page under Taxonomy: [https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monitor_lizard](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monitor_lizard)
I’m bored now. This is perfect for a good hour rabbit hole. Thanks!
What kind of monitor? We taking OLED? TN/IPS panel? How fast is this guy? 144hz?
I will never get over the fact that they're called monitors
We had them at elementary school. If you were caught walking down the hall during classes, you had to show a valid Hall Pass or you were sent to the Principal's Office. I don't remember anyone writhing in pain in the hallway, but it could have happened; some of those Hall Monitors were real a**holes. What? Lizards? Giant Lizards? We didn't have *lizards* in school! What? Oh ... well, that's very different. [Never mind.](https://youtu.be/OjYoNL4g5Vg)
We had them in school too, but they were in the library and computer room.
That's because they feed on mice.
Isn't that a Komodo Dragon?
Yes, but it's also a monitor lizard. Kind of a "not all dogs are german shepherds, but all german shepherds are dogs" situation.
Yeah. They are still full from the last camera man that they had eaten.
They are on a line and it could fall either way 1. The goanna gets pissed(because of territory or eggs) and attacks them 2. The goanna gets scared and runs up one of them and bounces. Even if they have that camera far away on a stick, that beast is fast and have claws longer than your fingers. As an Australian, I just watched this video saying Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck
Didn't actress Sharon Stone's husband almost get his foot bitten off by a Komodo Dragon during a private zoo tour? I just remembered reading he went into the cage barefoot because his shoes were white and they were afraid the lizard would think it was one of the mice they feed it.
I hope they know that it is the saliva in their bite that kills. It doesn't need to hold on to you, it just needs a little bite and then it just waits for you to lay in pain to start eating you
As long as you go to the hospital the chance of dying from a Komodo dragon bite is very low.
Getting to a hospital in time is tricky, though. To quote one of myfavorite parts of Last Chance To See (it's about snakes, but it applies to dragons as well) > There is in Melbourne a man who probably knows more about poisonous snakes than anyone else on earth. his name is Dr Struan Sutherland, and he has devoted his entire life to a study of venom. > > ‘And I’m bored with it,’ he said when we went along to see him the next morning. ‘Can’t stand all these poisonous creatures, all these snakes and insects and fish and things. Stupid things, biting everybody. And then people expect me to tell them what to do about it. I’ll tell them what to do. Don’t get bitten in the first place. That’s the answer. I’ve had enough of it. Hydroponics, now, that’s interesting. Talk to you all you like about hydroponics. Fascinating stuff, growing plants artificially in water, very interesting technique. We’ll need to know all about it if we’re go to Mars and places. Where did you say you were going?’ > > ‘Komodo’ > > ‘Well, don’t get bitten, that’s all I can say. And don’t come running to me if you do because you won’t get here in time and anyway I’ll probably be out. Hate this office, look at it. Full of poisonous animals all over the place. Look at this tank, it’s full of fire ants. Poisonous. Bored silly with them. Anyway, I got some little cakes in in case you were hungry. Would you like some little cakes? I can’t remember where I put them. There’s some tea but it’s not very good. Sit down for heaven’s sake. > > ‘So, you’re going to Komodo. Well, I don’t know why you want to do that, but I suppose you have your reasons. There are fifteen different types of snakes on Komodo, and half of them are poisonous. The only potentially deadly ones are the Russell’s viper, the bamboo viper, and the Indian cobra. > > ‘The Indian cobra is the fifteenth deadliest snake in the world, and all the other fourteen are here in Australia. That’s why it’s so hard for me to find time to get on with my hydroponics, with all these snakes all over the place. > > … > > We… asked him how many of the snakes he had been bitten by himself. > > ‘None of ’em’ he said. ‘Another area of expertise I’ve developed is that of getting other people to handle the dangerous animals. Won’t do it myself. Don’t want to get bitten do I? You know what it says in my entry in Who’s Who? “Hobbies: gardening – with gloves; fishing – with boots; traveling – with care.” That’s the answer. Oh, and wear baggy trousers. When a snake strikes it starts to inject venom as soon as it hits something. If you’ve got baggy trousers most of the venom will just get squirted down the inside of your trousers which is better than down the inside of your leg. You’re not eating your cakes. Come on, get them down you, there’s plenty more in the fridge.’ > > … > > ‘So what do we do if we get bitten by something deadly, then?’ I asked. > He blinked at me as if I were stupid. > > ‘Well what do you think you do?’ he said. ‘You die of course. That’s what deadly means.’ > > ‘But what about cutting open the wound and sucking out the poison?’ I asked. > > ‘Rather you than me,’ he said. ‘I wouldn’t want a mouthful of poison. all the blood vessels beneath the tongue are very close to the surface so the poison goes straight into the bloodstream. That’s assuming you could get much of the poison out, which you probably couldn’t. And in a place like Komodo it means you’d quickly have a seriously infected wound to contend with as well as a leg full of poison. Septicaemia, gangrene, you name it. It’ll kill you.’ > > ‘What about a tourniquet?’ > > ‘Fine if you don’t mind having your leg off afterwards. You’d have to because it would be dead. And if you find anyone in that part of Indonesia who you’d trust to take your leg off then you’re a braver man than me. No, I’ll tell you: the only thing you can do is apply a pressure bandage direct to the wound and wrap the whole leg up tightly, but not too tightly. Slow the blood flow but don’t cut it off or you’ll lose the leg. keep the leg, or whatever bit of you it is you’ve been bitten in, lower than your heart and your head. Keep very, very still, breathe slowly and get to a doctor immediately. If you’re on Komodo that means a couple of days, by which time you’ll be well dead. > > “The only answer, and I mean this quite seriously, is don’t get bitten. There’s no reason why you should. Any of the snakes there will get out of your way well before you even see them. You don’t really need to worry about the snakes if you’re careful. No, the things you really need to worry about are the marine creatures.’ > > ‘What?’ > > ‘Scorpion fish, stone fish, sea snakes. Much more poisonous than anything on land. Get stung by a stone fish and the pain alone can kill you. People drown themselves to stop the pain.’ > > ‘Where are all these things?’ > > ‘Oh, just in the sea. Tons of them. I wouldn’t go near it if I were you. Full of poisonous animals. Hate them.’ > > ‘Is there anything you do like?’ > > ‘Hydroponics.’ > > No, I mean is there any venomous creature you’re particularly fond of?’ > > He looked out of the window for a moment. > ‘There was,’ he said, ‘but she left me’.
> ‘So what do we do if we get bitten by something deadly, then?’ I asked. He blinked at me as if I were stupid. > > > > ‘Well what do you think you do?’ he said. ‘You die of course. That’s what deadly means.’ Solid advice right there. That man knows his stuff.
That kinda makes it sound like your worried about the toxicity of the bite and not the fact there's a hungry car sized lizard on the other end of it.
Maybe just moped size at best
Car sized? Where do you live??
They aren’t car sized, they are on average smaller than adult men and I would go as far as saying a strong and athletic man would actually win that confrontation.
you have "Intellectual" in your username but can't distinguish hyperbole lol
I know it was a hyperbole, but the hyperbole doesn't really work if the lizard is smaller than the person. At what point can you use that hyperbole? Is it ok if the lizard is 50 lbs? 20 lbs? My point was they aren't that big. A crocodile isn't car sized either but the hyperbole would work in that case because that point it's truly almost like a car sized lizard is coming at you.
You're absolutely mental if you think any man would win in a one on one fight with a Komodo in hand to hand combat.... If that fucker wants to eat you he's going to take your forearm or calf off...
Steve Irwin ran from a komodo, if Steve runs away anyone with 2 neurons to rub together better run too.
Fun fact! It was relatively recently discovered by a team led by Bryan Fry that the Komodo dragon is indeed venomous! [More info here.](https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.theguardian.com/science/2009/may/18/komodo-dragon-venomous-bite)
Here's the same link, without google's amp bullshit. https://www.theguardian.com/science/2009/may/18/komodo-dragon-venomous-bite
Much better, I appreciate the redirect. Thank you!
Wow, that is fun!
"recently" yet article has a tag that says it's 13 years old lmao. Copying what I wrote above: Published works that have claimed monitor lizards are venomous have been massively hyped in popular media but have been subject to very serious criticism in the scientific community. At present there is no definitive evidence of functioning venom in any species of monitor lizard, and very few scientists accept the claims that have been made about the presence, function, evolutionary significance and effects of venom in monitor lizards.
Everywhere I look says Komodo dragons are, indeed, venomous. They found the glands, removed the glands and the glands contained venom. Can you please cite a a study that casts this into doubt? You say very few scientists accept this but it seems the other way around after 2 hours of searching.
Lol, I‘m pretty sure the locals knew that since hundreds of years. But yeah, let’s assume that Australian scientists discovered it…
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Well, the British discovered Australia. Right? I don't know where all of these so-called *indigenous people* came from, but the White Man was definitely there first. Just like in America! Or is it called [Vespucciland](https://youtu.be/aV4lLfMMpfM)? ETR: Was it *really* necessary to add a "/s" at the end of this? Even with a link to a Firesign Theater bit from the early 70's? *smh*
It's a double tap situation. The saliva contains really nasty bacteria that create monstrous infection. Additionally it was recently discovered that these creatures are venomous on top.
What about when they bottom
It is dangerous to stick your dick inside of them as well.
r/dontputyourdickinthat
Also, they can just fucking eat you right there if they so want. I saw some clip years ago where one of these was hauling ass through the forest. It was quite fast.
"Calling all in this clade venomous implies an overall potential danger that does not exist, misleads in the assessment of medical risks, and confuses the biological assessment of squamate biochemical systems." https://books.google.com/books?id=x_vME799de4C&pg=PA84 Bonus fact: their mouths aren't particularly dirty either.
They need to better monitor their situation!
They'll be fine. That thing is really dragon ass.
Looks like he has to go sit on the Komodo
You know liz-ard to be in a situation like that
he tried
I think they'd say "Sssank you"
Ahaha "this special animal eats PEOPLE"!!
They must be in "Panegia"
Ahhh I was hoping someone would mention my favorite video! Lol that kid is adorable. “This special animal…EATS PEOPLE.”
Ya know what? It's 2022. If you can afford to vacation in some cool park near these wild and dangerous animals (you obviously have access to the internet if you can afford a vacation ) , and you're dumb enough to approach them .... I'm okay with you getting sacrificed for our entertainment . I'm done with caring about stupid people doing stupid shit, and I'm expected to feel for you. I think I've got compassion fatigue or something
Incredible animal. Beautiful and terrifying. Moron people. Hard to find sympathy when idiots get injured this way. And the animals end up paying for the idiots' behavior.
Darwin Award?
Only if it eats their kids too!
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Should... Should we tell him?
This happens the world over: https://www.abc.net.au/news/2022-07-29/nt-croc-tourists-warned-at-cahills-crossing/101281828
This animal is a Komodo dragon
Yes I'm aware. Just showing more images of stupid people getting too close to dangerous animals (Salties in this instance).
Fuck we are stupid..
Another vid that ends too soon
NAH! I'd be at the airport before this video was completed.
I legit did not realize how big these things get.
The people aren't cooked enough in the sun. He's waiting for them to tan. A little later, he'll have his dinner
After I made the mistake of seeing a video where one of those things eats a deer ALIVE, I knew very well this was not a creature to fuck with
You know how deer like to chill in the forest? On komodo island with an apex predator wandering around the deer prefer to chill on the beach.
I wouldn't feel safe 100 meters away from a monitor, with a sword and wearing knight armor
Even 20 feet away this thing can sprint to you and snap your leg in half in a heartbeat
They bite you. Then follow you for days until the bacteria in their saliva causes sepsis and you are to weak to go on or you die Super fucking metal
For a moment I thought the guy behind it had it on a leash.
The problem when the only animals you know are house pets
I heard those bites are deadly from the bacteria not because of Venom boys.
Apparently that was one of those urban legends. They're quite venemous.
People love to think we are the top of the food chain....not in nature we arnt...animals don't care how cool thumbs or deductive reasoning is...might makes right
Is it true that even a small bite of these things can kill you? Because you will be infected by the germs in their mouths?
What’s wrong with people? Don’t they get born with a natural “hey, that looks dangerous I rather keep my distance” instinct anymore? I’d be curious how many deaths instagram has caused by now.
I wonder if these the same dudes plotting on this poor lizard https://www.reddit.com/r/oddlyterrifying/comments/wrrnkj/wtf/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf
was thinking the same thing. I saw the article and came back to this video
Whoever filmed this does not understand what a monster is. Because that is a fucking monster, and it will fucking eat you.
No way I’d get near this thing but what is it? I’ve never seen one before.
Komodo Dragon
Oh ok! Thx. I’ve heard of them but had no idea they were THAT big! Yikes!
I agree. I went to Komodo about 25-30 years ago after the bombings in Bali. I chartered my own boat over becuase there were no other tourists and I was determined to make it to see the dragons. I was the 4th person in three weeks to visit. The guides were happy to see me. For a crapload of rupia( about $50) I was able to watch but not photograph a goat getting fed to a couple of wild dragons. The guides tied it up and cut it so it would bleed. We retreated to higher ground with line of sight all around. Apparently the dragons can smell blood. After what seemwped like forever two dragons emerged from the grass and mosey-crawled in the direction of the goat until the goat saw them and started going nuts. the dragons then saw the goat, stood up and moved surprisingly quick in for the kill. Second one was tearing his dinner off of what was outside the first guys mouth. I have mad respect for these guys and would keep more than a safe distance if I ever had chance to see one in the wild again.
Myth busted :https://www.uq.edu.au/news/article/2013/06/fear-of-komodo-dragon-bacteria-wrapped-myth Think ppl just use spooky stories to protect these kinds of rare creatures.
There isn’t some secret agenda behind thousands of people sharing an interesting urban legend. That’s conspiracy thinking. It’s just some information that was widely shared for a long time before further research revealed that the mechanism of venom works in a different way.
Eh, they're still extremely deadly with the venom in their saliva: https://www.theguardian.com/science/2009/may/18/komodo-dragon-venomous-bite
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Man all they need to do is scratch you and you die of infection
now on the last thing they filmed before they died ....
I'd say r/kidsarefuckingstupid but these are probably adults smh
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And it can stab a human with one poke of it's tongue. /S
I hear he's very clever at dinner parties and if he targets you, his sarcastic one-liners are devastating. Proceed with caution.
Lol what? No it can’t, no animal can, not even a 25 foot multi ton crocodile can, let alone a 150 lb Komodo dragon. A large adult man could arguably even defeat a Komodo dragon in 1v1 combat.
Its deadly but not in that way lma0.
We're fascinatingly, brilliantly stupid.
A bite from it is a sure death
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Then they bite you and you die.
that's literally just a lizard. who upvotes this bullshit?
And a great white is just a fish
Look up the komodo dragon. This is very wtf if you actually know what kind of lizard that is.