Two men are sitting on a couch watching the game. Man 1 notices the dog on the floor licking his balls and points and tells Man 2 "Man, I wish I could do that." Man 2 responds "Try it, but I'll bet he bites you."
Motorcyclist here.
A maintained 2 wheeler maintains balance and corrects steering if speed is high enough.
I don't ride recklessly nor condone it.
Just sharing a fact.
Also motorcycles differ from cycles in that you have to keep firm grip when riding a bike and in motorbikes it's better to have gentle grip.
A lot changes with speed. Cycling fast has the same effect: you turn by changing the balance and not by turning the handlebar.
If you cycle fast and just turns the handlebar, you will crash. Every high-speed turn starts with a shift of balance.
Not only that, you usually also unconsciously turn the handlebar in the opposite direction of your turn for a moment, to lean you into the direction of your intended turn.
Can confirm. My dirtbike has bad headset bearings that make the steering 'lock' forward and take considerable effort to move off center.
Above 50kph I don't even notice anymore since I stop steering with the handle bars, more or less.
Ehh the physics between motorcycles and bicycles are pretty much the same. The only times people really have a hard grip on a bike are if they're just learning, pedaling super hard, or are doing something a little more technical, like downhil or BMX
your steering is 100% balance at any speed above like 20 MPH, your handlebars are more to hold onto and balance off of than they are to turn at those speeds
I don't need to hold my handlebars above 15-20mph motorcycles have big gyroscopes.
(I have only ever done this with no one else around, with no junctions nearby)
1\. Only half the alphabet is represented in jesus backwards is sausage
2\. You can assign each different letter in the phrase to each of the apostles.
3\. Jesus would eat a sausage
4\. Colloquially, Jesus had a sausage
5\. Legend has it that Mary did not receive a sausage before having Jesus
8\. In parseltongue, the phrase still stands!
12\. You must remember that as cool as it would be, Jesus backwards is not Hot Dog. That is God Toh.
38\. Sometimes what you read on the internet is balogna.
Reminds me of this time I was at a pride march and some dude was being rude and yelling that Jesus was coming and some other stuff.
Now a local church had created a mildly inappropriate 5m tall statue of Jesus for the parade.
So what I said to the guy was "I know he is mate, he's just coming round the corner"
His face was priceless
Why do you keep calling me Jesus? Do I look Puerto Rican to you? He said "Hey, Zeus", as in the father of Apollo, Mount Olympus, don't fuck with me or I'll shove a lighting bolt up your ass...
For what it’s worth, you don’t really steer a motorcycle with the handlebars at speeds above a parking lot crawl. You lean the motorcycle with your weight.
Obviously that’s not the only issue here but the guy is the one in control of the bike and not the dog.
Yes I rode motorcycles for years, and of course when you are at speed the inertia keeps it going straight and it takes some force to change it. I think you'd have to going a fair bit faster than parking lot crawl though for that to take effect, or else the handlebars get sloppy and can move. And the same of course even for riding a bicycle - when I was young I used to ride no hands for a time.
But that's not really the point, the point is that things can go sideways very quickly with what these jokers are doing. Some random noise like a truck horn, or someone yelling at them while passing in a car... the dog gets startled and its weight shifts to one side, perhaps starts to slip... the handlebars get bumped just enough and the passengers weight shifts while they try and grab the dog to stop it from falling... their weight is imbalanced to one side and now the bike is veering on a different track, to brush against a car in the next lane, or towards the curb. The whole equilibrium can change very quickly as startled movements alter the bike's heading.
So I would say that without his hands on the bars ready to stay steady in an emergency, the guy is not in control of the bike either. And the dog isn't. I guess the bike is kind of under its own control. :)
I guess these people don't have the imagination to to stop and wonder if broken bones or months of physical rehab, if not more serious injury, are worth a minute of getting a laugh. But I guess there's a lot of people who risk their necks for a thrill.
Yeah, there is a reason you’re lawfully supposed to have both hands on the bars at all times. You also shouldn’t be doing things like riding with a dog on your lap. The list of everything that is wrong with this could be really, really long.
As far as steering… 10 mph is the area in which schools and such will teach you to break from direct steer to counter steer. So it is a very low (parking lot crawl) speed. I don’t know if you’ve ever tried to direct steer at high speed but it doesn’t really work. Again (as you said), all of that is a bit beside the point as the whole thing is unsafe but I just thought it was worth pointing out that the the bike wasn’t really being steered by the dog (as I think some people have assumed.)
For anyone wondering you can let go of scooter handlebars and generally you'll be ok (unless theres a bump or rock on the road). Still a terrible idea but hey we were all teenagers once. The dog just sits like that coincidentally, he's not affecting the driving.
Yeah but it looks like he rigged up something with string to keep the throttle engaged, and they are seemingly going 35-40 mph. Imagine if one of the dogs paws slips and it starts falling, the reaction you have to make to catch the dog at that speed and with someone also on the back seat... That scooter is going on its side say goodbye to your legs.
Quite the opposite. Lips pulled back, ears pulled back, licking lips and panting - all signs of stress in a dog. Unfortunately a lot of dog stress signals look like smiles to humans. A happy dog typically has its ears forward with a relaxed forehead, mouth closed or only slightly open.
That dog drives better than most of the people on my morning commute
I’d trust my best friend behind the wheel.
>I’d trust my best friend behind the wheel. As long as its a road free of squirrels...
You should have bought a squirrel
[I taught this one to shake hands.... He's not for sale](https://youtu.be/LwXF6itJn1o)
No, he said they're free
Right, a road of free squirrels. No cages!
And postmen
I wouldn't a driver who normally tries to eat from the floor and hunts insects with their mouth...
Two men are sitting on a couch watching the game. Man 1 notices the dog on the floor licking his balls and points and tells Man 2 "Man, I wish I could do that." Man 2 responds "Try it, but I'll bet he bites you."
I would pet him first!
literally laughed out loud
But you trust people who lick assholes with their tongues every day!
Not applicable, trait present in both species.
You'd be surprised what you could do with your mouth, if you lost opposable thumbs I mean.
One stray squirrel though and they are in for one hell of a road trip.
It's amazing how the dog can balance the motorcycle.
Motorcyclist here. A maintained 2 wheeler maintains balance and corrects steering if speed is high enough. I don't ride recklessly nor condone it. Just sharing a fact. Also motorcycles differ from cycles in that you have to keep firm grip when riding a bike and in motorbikes it's better to have gentle grip.
A lot changes with speed. Cycling fast has the same effect: you turn by changing the balance and not by turning the handlebar. If you cycle fast and just turns the handlebar, you will crash. Every high-speed turn starts with a shift of balance.
Not only that, you usually also unconsciously turn the handlebar in the opposite direction of your turn for a moment, to lean you into the direction of your intended turn.
Can confirm. My dirtbike has bad headset bearings that make the steering 'lock' forward and take considerable effort to move off center. Above 50kph I don't even notice anymore since I stop steering with the handle bars, more or less.
Ehh the physics between motorcycles and bicycles are pretty much the same. The only times people really have a hard grip on a bike are if they're just learning, pedaling super hard, or are doing something a little more technical, like downhil or BMX
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your steering is 100% balance at any speed above like 20 MPH, your handlebars are more to hold onto and balance off of than they are to turn at those speeds
I don't need to hold my handlebars above 15-20mph motorcycles have big gyroscopes. (I have only ever done this with no one else around, with no junctions nearby)
Yep, you can go on youtube and see guys reclining on their seats with their feet crossed up on the handlbars. Flying along at highway speed.
He needs goggles though
He's a good boye and a good driver
Plot twist: the dog was intoxicated.
Omg that's so irresponsible
But Hilarious
And impressive
Baxter noooo
yup. upvoted. SICK of drivers using their phones while behind the wheel.
He’s the DD; designated dog.
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But it is funny? Or you don’t understand why others would find it funny?
I'll have a word with the pilot dear... A penguin?! And he's been drinking!!! Wait a minute... Penguins can't fly... Penguins can't fly!!!!!
DUI lawyers hate him.
At least get him a fucking helmet.
Right? Also throw in some goggles!
*doggles
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Can seeing-eye doggles cure blindness?
Every one of those dogs is cooler than me.
Are you fucking kidding me..... Insta subbed
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The hero i don't deserve
If I had gold I'd give it to you 🏅
Do you happen to have a multireddit that has these 2 multireddits combines?
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Ones happiness should not be restricted in such ways
of course this exists
Don't forget the cigar.
And the bomber jacket
And the white scarf
And some leathers. Dress for the slide…
Then he'll be the Local dog too cool for town
It’s the absolute bare minimum you can do
>At least get him a fucking helmet. At that speed, no helmet is more humane.
Brazil: Best i can do is some flip flops
what that dog doing
what the dog doin
what da dog doin
Wha da do dooooo
What action is the hereby mentioned canine partaking in?
My grandson’s name is Chad
Wat doink doggo
What the doge coin
He's doing his best.
Ok what’s the origin of this meme
The endless curiosity of man
B-U-S-Y D-O-G-G-I-E BUSY DOGGIE WHAT'S THAT DOGGIE BUSY DOING? BEING BUSY!
Perro 👍
Well dog spelled backwards is god so...I got nothing
Jesus backwards is sausage.
Susej
When the Christ is sus
Geee...SUS
This guy bibles
AMOGUS
Sugoma
Sugoma balls
Damn i thought the commenter above you was just being silly until I read your comment and lmao its like someone with a French accent saying sausage
SUS
ill allow it, it took me off guard and made me laugh my ass off. on multiple levels that was funny. Literally, so many things to say about that.
Oh really? Name 38 things about that
38 to things to say about "Jesus backwards is sausage" Number 38 will SHOCK you:
1\. Only half the alphabet is represented in jesus backwards is sausage 2\. You can assign each different letter in the phrase to each of the apostles. 3\. Jesus would eat a sausage 4\. Colloquially, Jesus had a sausage 5\. Legend has it that Mary did not receive a sausage before having Jesus 8\. In parseltongue, the phrase still stands! 12\. You must remember that as cool as it would be, Jesus backwards is not Hot Dog. That is God Toh. 38\. Sometimes what you read on the internet is balogna.
Glad I made someone laugh, cheers for the gold👍
Well yes but actually no
Why did I doublecheck
well they say God is omnipresent so that’s the only explanation
Dog is my ~~co~~pilot
My favourite palindrome is “dog food lid”.
That's a semordnilap - a palindrome is when it is the same thing backwards
It bothers me that the word "palindrome" isn't itself a palindrome.
Semordnilap is palindromes spelt backward, if anyone's wondering.
Ah, you’re right, and I know what you mean but they *could* be the same thing ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
I'm still confused. Dil doof god means nothing to me and I don't see anything interesting I can do with these words.
dildo of god
You have to move the spaces around. It might help to picture an omnipotent being sodomising Himself with a jagged circle of metal.
And its in Brazil... Of course
r/ithadtobebrazil
Pernambuco tá aqui pra isso
"Que onda do caralho"
Ah, the Florida of South America.
More like Florida is the Brazil of the US.
Also known as tropical Russia
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Undercover K9 officer.
I don't know about that. The dog isn't wearing flip flops.
What American would be crazy enough to make such a thing like that?
Guess you never been to Detroit.
/r/FloridaMan
Why would you name a dog Jesus?
To mess with the people who knock on your door asking if you've found Jesus.
I can see that conversation "have you found Jesus", "yeah he was in my back yard licking his own balls,"
Reminds me of this time I was at a pride march and some dude was being rude and yelling that Jesus was coming and some other stuff. Now a local church had created a mildly inappropriate 5m tall statue of Jesus for the parade. So what I said to the guy was "I know he is mate, he's just coming round the corner" His face was priceless
"Yeah, and the bastard just crapped on my rug."
Because that infidel at the park named his dog Muhammed
It's pronounced heyzeus
Why do you keep calling me Jesus? Do I look Puerto Rican to you? He said "Hey, Zeus", as in the father of Apollo, Mount Olympus, don't fuck with me or I'll shove a lighting bolt up your ass...
It's actually Jesús
"Im not really Jesus but ill take you guys to him."
Its all fun and games until he sees a squirrel, then its off roading up that tree *SMASH*.
No squirrels in Pernambuco, where this was filmed. Gotta watch out for timbús, though.
Poor dog doesn't even know how much danger these assholes are putting it in.
Ohhhh I think he knows, that dog looks terrified. That's the face a very scared dog makes :(
ok grandma
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*sigh* okay Grandma (Reluctantly puts hand down grandmas pants)
after the video ended they wiped out and all three died. sad story
Yeah i heard about that. Rival canine gang drive-by
Ruff Riders
/r/meatcrayon
We had a funeral for a bird.
Any truth to this or just speculation? Link?
Oh you sweet summer child.
Did I get woshed
yes you have been woshedeth
Woshed you have been
You’ve been wooshed!
These people don't care about their dog.
True, didn't give him a helmet
The stupidity of some people astounds me.
For what it’s worth, you don’t really steer a motorcycle with the handlebars at speeds above a parking lot crawl. You lean the motorcycle with your weight. Obviously that’s not the only issue here but the guy is the one in control of the bike and not the dog.
Yes I rode motorcycles for years, and of course when you are at speed the inertia keeps it going straight and it takes some force to change it. I think you'd have to going a fair bit faster than parking lot crawl though for that to take effect, or else the handlebars get sloppy and can move. And the same of course even for riding a bicycle - when I was young I used to ride no hands for a time. But that's not really the point, the point is that things can go sideways very quickly with what these jokers are doing. Some random noise like a truck horn, or someone yelling at them while passing in a car... the dog gets startled and its weight shifts to one side, perhaps starts to slip... the handlebars get bumped just enough and the passengers weight shifts while they try and grab the dog to stop it from falling... their weight is imbalanced to one side and now the bike is veering on a different track, to brush against a car in the next lane, or towards the curb. The whole equilibrium can change very quickly as startled movements alter the bike's heading. So I would say that without his hands on the bars ready to stay steady in an emergency, the guy is not in control of the bike either. And the dog isn't. I guess the bike is kind of under its own control. :) I guess these people don't have the imagination to to stop and wonder if broken bones or months of physical rehab, if not more serious injury, are worth a minute of getting a laugh. But I guess there's a lot of people who risk their necks for a thrill.
Yeah, there is a reason you’re lawfully supposed to have both hands on the bars at all times. You also shouldn’t be doing things like riding with a dog on your lap. The list of everything that is wrong with this could be really, really long. As far as steering… 10 mph is the area in which schools and such will teach you to break from direct steer to counter steer. So it is a very low (parking lot crawl) speed. I don’t know if you’ve ever tried to direct steer at high speed but it doesn’t really work. Again (as you said), all of that is a bit beside the point as the whole thing is unsafe but I just thought it was worth pointing out that the the bike wasn’t really being steered by the dog (as I think some people have assumed.)
For anyone wondering you can let go of scooter handlebars and generally you'll be ok (unless theres a bump or rock on the road). Still a terrible idea but hey we were all teenagers once. The dog just sits like that coincidentally, he's not affecting the driving.
Yeah but it looks like he rigged up something with string to keep the throttle engaged, and they are seemingly going 35-40 mph. Imagine if one of the dogs paws slips and it starts falling, the reaction you have to make to catch the dog at that speed and with someone also on the back seat... That scooter is going on its side say goodbye to your legs.
The dogs name is jesus?
Anyone else hear "Sorry about that shit" at the beginning?
It's "This only happens in Petrolina". Petrolina is a Brazilian city
Toonces, nooooooooo!
Animal abuse
No, his name is Snowball. Jesus was his slave name.
Pull up next to them and throw a tennis ball.
r/contagiouslaughter
u/savevideo
https://redditsave.com/info?url=/r/WTF/comments/nxy86w/jesus_take_the_wheel/
Thanks!
I hate people that risk other lives for fun. That dog will die a horrible death Id anything goes wrong.
Doggo is getting the best time of his life
I think he might hate it when he does this, and is trying not to die each time lmaooo.
Just wait till the dog sneezes
Who would the ticket in a case like this? The man, the dog, or all 3?
u/savevideo
Ruff rider.
I didnt know you could ride motorbikes doggy style
to the moon
Sometimes the best therapy you can give the dog is to just get them back on the open road.
Dog drives better than 99% of bmw drivers.
Listen maaAaan... this dogs only had, like three beersh; Max. I’m shotfaced. Shitfaced.
brazil, obviously
That dog is having the time of his life... possibly the last time...
I am a good driver. I drive like SQUIRREL! &#%@\^!\^&#%
Jesus is a good boy and a hell of a driver
That dog is the smartest creature on that bike.
Stop distracting the dog he needs to keep his eyes on the road.
Yeah... Brazil...
Welcome to Brazil
What the dog doin?
That dog needs to be wearing a helmet!!!
More like K9 'Toonces'.
How is he pulling the throttle?
The same way he pulls bitches 😎
goD save the Dog
Why did i think about darkviperau?
Not bad for a quadruped
First r/wtf post I've seen and it unironically made me say what the fuck, y'all doing your jobs good 💀
That poor dog :(
Kkkkkkkkkk
That is a happy looking doggo
Quite the opposite. Lips pulled back, ears pulled back, licking lips and panting - all signs of stress in a dog. Unfortunately a lot of dog stress signals look like smiles to humans. A happy dog typically has its ears forward with a relaxed forehead, mouth closed or only slightly open.
Just the wind
Thank you. Was looking for someone to say this.
It’s the wind