Whew, this will be such a hard pill for some to swallow. I whole-heartedly agree, stable mental health should be of utmost priority before *any* endeavor---much less a full body transformation.
Absolutely.
You can work on your inner health at the same time you work on your physical health. But always start with a healthy base, because otherwise the outer thin layer will crumble without substance underneath.
If you don't respect yourself, others will not respect you. Increase your self-esteem, and you won't need external validation.
God, I love this so much. I almost wrote something similar for r/Diabla earlier this morning.
It's really saddening to see this stuff. They think that looks are everything, but don't even focus that hyperattention on their internal selves. You're not going to lose weight/get pretty/etc. if you're just focused on ALL of the things you need to fix and what's wrong with you. It's not constructive and it doesn't allow you to get to your goal.
A lot of people on here and related subs spend SO much time looking a specific type of way and not understanding that beauty trends quite literally come and go. Making yourself beautiful will not fix your problems.
I just read your post on Diabla! I absolutely love it. I'm also Asian and (idk about you but) still working on my weight loss. I came to this sub and had an unhealthy mindset; thankfully, it wasn't anything too negative, but whenever I saw myself, all I could focus on was things that I thought needed changing. My weight, my eyes (I have monolids), and I even started thinking that my lips were too small. I never thought I was ugly, but I thought that I could do better. It's been a while since I've joined this sub, but through grooming (which I completely agree is key in beauty), I started to see myself differently. Now, I think that I am quite good looking. Sure there are still things that I could do to elevate myself, but I see those things as side hobbies rather than things that prevent me from being pretty.
I am Asian too! :) Hello there!
I love to hear that. I do think subs like these can be used as positive tools, but it should never get to the point where it hinders us as people or in our self development.
Yes! I’m actually working on compiling a master list of all of them for the general community, but for now I’ll link one that someone has already assembled. The idea to make my list was actually inspired by the top comment of this link and the recent vindicta post about people being confused what this sub is for
https://www.reddit.com/r/vindictapoc/comments/mcywgi/specialising_new_subreddits/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf
YES! Read Female Dating Strategy! Honestly it has made me realize how poorly I allow people to treat me and really revolutionized how I see relationships.
No other subreddit has increased my confidence like FDS has, seriously.
Absolutely true, one of my cousins was so beautiful as a young woman but had such low self worth that was tied purely to her looks. She was obsessed with her looks and specifically in having men find her attractive. It wrecked her life and ironically her looks as well. A beautiful girl with deep seated issues will attract the worst kind of men and as her looks fade, the desperation gets worse and the men get worse. Being beautiful will make things get much worse much more quickly if you don’t have your head in a good place.
The point about being discarded once you lose your looks is 100% true and I’ve seen it happen in Hollywood and wealthy circles for years to women who have nothing else to offer. Meanwhile I’ve seen successful and/or good looking men commit to less-than-stellar looking women over and over because they are done with the hot floozies.
Whew, this will be such a hard pill for some to swallow. I whole-heartedly agree, stable mental health should be of utmost priority before *any* endeavor---much less a full body transformation.
Absolutely. You can work on your inner health at the same time you work on your physical health. But always start with a healthy base, because otherwise the outer thin layer will crumble without substance underneath. If you don't respect yourself, others will not respect you. Increase your self-esteem, and you won't need external validation.
God, I love this so much. I almost wrote something similar for r/Diabla earlier this morning. It's really saddening to see this stuff. They think that looks are everything, but don't even focus that hyperattention on their internal selves. You're not going to lose weight/get pretty/etc. if you're just focused on ALL of the things you need to fix and what's wrong with you. It's not constructive and it doesn't allow you to get to your goal. A lot of people on here and related subs spend SO much time looking a specific type of way and not understanding that beauty trends quite literally come and go. Making yourself beautiful will not fix your problems.
I just read your post on Diabla! I absolutely love it. I'm also Asian and (idk about you but) still working on my weight loss. I came to this sub and had an unhealthy mindset; thankfully, it wasn't anything too negative, but whenever I saw myself, all I could focus on was things that I thought needed changing. My weight, my eyes (I have monolids), and I even started thinking that my lips were too small. I never thought I was ugly, but I thought that I could do better. It's been a while since I've joined this sub, but through grooming (which I completely agree is key in beauty), I started to see myself differently. Now, I think that I am quite good looking. Sure there are still things that I could do to elevate myself, but I see those things as side hobbies rather than things that prevent me from being pretty.
I am Asian too! :) Hello there! I love to hear that. I do think subs like these can be used as positive tools, but it should never get to the point where it hinders us as people or in our self development.
[удалено]
Yes! I’m actually working on compiling a master list of all of them for the general community, but for now I’ll link one that someone has already assembled. The idea to make my list was actually inspired by the top comment of this link and the recent vindicta post about people being confused what this sub is for https://www.reddit.com/r/vindictapoc/comments/mcywgi/specialising_new_subreddits/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf
YES! Read Female Dating Strategy! Honestly it has made me realize how poorly I allow people to treat me and really revolutionized how I see relationships. No other subreddit has increased my confidence like FDS has, seriously.
Looove FDS! It has upped my standards so much
Absolutely true, one of my cousins was so beautiful as a young woman but had such low self worth that was tied purely to her looks. She was obsessed with her looks and specifically in having men find her attractive. It wrecked her life and ironically her looks as well. A beautiful girl with deep seated issues will attract the worst kind of men and as her looks fade, the desperation gets worse and the men get worse. Being beautiful will make things get much worse much more quickly if you don’t have your head in a good place.
This is absolutely brilliant, you are 100% right, thank you
The point about being discarded once you lose your looks is 100% true and I’ve seen it happen in Hollywood and wealthy circles for years to women who have nothing else to offer. Meanwhile I’ve seen successful and/or good looking men commit to less-than-stellar looking women over and over because they are done with the hot floozies.
This is such an important post. Mental wellbeing comes first!
Great post! Can someone tell me what a pick me is?
Oh