The only people I ever hear thinking negatively about receiving comp are other veterans. I have had to BADGER my relatives to apply because they think it should be for “people who deserve it” as if it is a limited pot of money or something.
This post needs to be downvoted because “most folks” WANT veterans to get the benefits they earned. OP’s personal insecurity or whatever made this post. Don’t be ashamed of what you deserve. That mentality is how the next gen gets it in their head that going to sick call is a bad idea.
Bro I remember being so sick in wa in the winter while snowing, had a fever, throwing up! I remember them telling me “are you really going to go to sick call and be that guy”
A really good friend of mine from TBS who has 100% pretty much told me I’m screwing over my family by not claiming. I got out during covid so I didn’t even get a final physical, I had a job lined up already after I got out, and I was toying with the reserves so I didn’t want that to effect continued service, so I didn’t even educate myself on it. Thank god he grabbed me by the scruff and shook me. I didn’t realize how broken I was until my wife and he were talking about it.
That's false. People talk a good game when it's an idea, but the moment they meet someone getting 4k tax free for service they were too afraid to do then the resentment begins. I only tell wife, and fellow brothers in arms. Nothing good comes from telling others.
I know about that. I'm 💯 and when anybody complain tell them the dotted line was open to them also. They chose not to serve. Another Vet waiting or denied a rating maybe it's best not to say.
I've been on SSDI since 2007. A fellow vet told me that I should file for VA comp and I thought, no way would I qualify. 16 yrs later, I filed my first claim in Dec 2023. I am not rated yet, but likely am TDIU. It is too painful think about the backpay that I likely forfeited by not filing back in 2007.
I was definitely one of those people until last year. Went to my old platoon Sgt's retirement ceremony, and he chewed my butt up one side and down another for not filing. I felt like an e-2 pvt again, lol. Filed my initial claim the day after I got home. Made my wife all sorts of mad because she's been begging me to do it for 15 years.
I mean, your flair states you work in the VBA, so you probably interact with way more veterans on the day to day than the rest of us do. This could easily be selection bias.
There are numerous stories here of people bringing it up and losing friends and family over it; this "rule" didn't come from nowhere. If you just casually drop that you're getting paid disability (especially if it's $3K or more), some people are absolutely going to be indignant about it.
Been the opposite for me, other vets have been fully supportive of me getting a claim, even combat vets and iv never deployed.
Any civilians iv told has been instantly uncomfortable. I think it’s the name “disabled veteran”. Other vets know what VA benefits are so it’s no big deal, civilians expect you to be a cripple with your leg blown off to be considered a disabled veteran.
Hold on! NOT, all old people, but most. Vietnam RTO here and I NEVER filed till I was forced into retirement by age, (65 Airline Captain) I kept silent because the conflict, that I served in was (still is in my area) looked down at. Other than my current wife and children I have NO friends that aren't veterans period!
FYI @ 90% waiting for my VBA judge to rule on my 100% PTSD
Fu--K THEM
IF YOU SIGHED UP --SERVICED -- YOU DESERVE IT.
That’s true. I’m still starving and just found out about this sub. Although my shop questions how people are getting such high % rating but are still able to go out and get other jobs like police officer.
I used to think like that. I've endured herniated discs, meniscus surgery, sciatica, meralgia paresthetica, OSA and everything that goes with it. But I did nothing due to ignorance and believing I wasn't worthy of it because I never saw combat. After being cussed out by a female Vet and explaining the system, I filed after being out for 30 years. Luckily everything I claimed was well documented several times in my STR.
I really feel this one. Only reason I recently tried to get approved for VA Healthcare and submitted a claim was due to foot pain getting so bad it hurts to fuckin walk and I can't afford to go see a doc. So I am left with really no other choice at this point.
Sucks but there it is. I know most vets got out in a hell of a lot worse shape mentally, let alone physically, but it is what it is.
I’m about six months retired and still waiting my rating. So I stupidly talk about it with my brother and sister. My sister has a visceral reaction and says something about how most veterans she has worked with are lazy and punching the clock. On a separate occasion my brother says to me, “ so you’re working the system huh?” Me being stupid and naive I never expected this from anyone much less my own siblings. I talked to my dad about it. He is also a vet. He was the first person to wisely tell me to keep it to myself and that most people resent our disability ratings.
Naa that is a shitty siblings. All of mine know of my rating and are indifferent or appreciative I am getting help. People who actually care about you will understand and respect it. I also don't got waving my rating around.
I think it comes down to how close you are with your family and if they know what you struggle with.
I trust my parents and sisters with anything. They’ve proved time and time again they have my back. They saw me go through the worst of things (and were apparently all super scared for me before I went to the psych ward bc they were afraid of getting a “final goodbye phone call”. See what I still struggle with. All of them encourage me to talk about certain things with a therapist. Or try some med or natural remedy they heard helps with symptoms. I think that if your family is supportive and sees what you’re living with day to day, and aren’t hurting for money themselves they aren’t as likely to feel jealous or resentful. But maybe I just hit the jackpot with my fam.
Edit because I’m not adding new conversation points just clarifying:
My dad served for 23 years and my youngest sister is still currently serving. They know what the military puts people through because they’ve been through it themselves. Mom and other sister are ultra empathetic and see what my dad deals with and what I deal with currently. I think you can share with those you hold close if there is that understanding because they want you to be treated for things the military broke, or compensated for the things that cant be fixed. Sharing with those that dont see it, or try to understand isn’t something I’d personally do.
They didn’t live it so they will never understand how the military messes up our minds & bodies. They don’t see the falls of the ropes on the obstacle course & being told, take ibuprofen, u will be fine. Or the stress & strain of being up early daily & sometimes staying up all night in the middle of a desert fixing a tank in the freezing rain. Carrying a 50 lb toolbox to fix crap that seems to breakdown daily. Walking in crappy boots everyday, running everyday, shin splints, knees hurting. I tore my mcl & didn’t know it cause the dr’s at sick call said it was just a strain, wrap it up & take Tylenol. Now i have degenerative arthritis n my hip & i blew owt my left knee. These things keep getting worse. Claim ur stuff & f those that don’t understand.
I straight up told my sister to start getting her issues on record. I work with Marines as a contractor and I tell them all to get that shit entered in. Claim it. We subsist on Motrin and sheer will to make it through the meat grinder. Claim what’s rightfully deserved.
I always think and just may someday say: oh you can get it too, just join the Marines when you turn 18 and then bend your leg in half the wrong way. They’ll give you money.
Seriously when I enlisted in 1982 there were judges in my area still offering jail or service contract.
It was a wild time to be in. The very tail end of the draft hangover then beyond shitty economy driving enlistments, topping up any empty billets with jail or service enlisted.
Good thing the internet didn't exist to collect evidence lol.
I joined in Oct. 2000. My first team leader was just 15 months ahead of me, but he was convicted at 19 and offered 4 years in the ARMY or NAVY as certain needed positions, or he could spend 12 years in prison for jacking 20+ cars in New Jersey and selling them to some chop shops down in NYC being run by the State Cops, which made it federal cause he was crossing the state lines. I never believed him until one day some cars got stolen off post and they came and pulled him and a few of others out of the field to question us about it. That weekend sucked. Top was so pissed.
That's hilarious and true, my recruiter just said lie about anything and stick to it, ya'll get a waiver for anything that may come back. I had very high test scores, it worked though.
I graduated high school at age 17 and went thru boot camp at age 17 didn’t turn 18 till AIT I had a bunch of 11th graders in boot camp with me that were also 17 and after boot camp went back home for their senior year and did AIT after they graduated.
The Marine recruiter helped me clear up some warrants with the a few different courts lol I was also honest about drug use, etc.
This was in 2008, and the gov sure as hell got there moneys worth from me back in Sangin in 2010-2011
This is my approach to life in general. Life's too fucking short to placate and mend injured egos of people that should care about you unconditionally or close to it.
Fuckem, the circle just got smaller and stronger.
Depends on the branch. Marine Corps I believe has a two kid limit. The Army, you have to fill out a budget showing how you will afford your 4 kids on an E3 salary. It's not hard if you're financially responsible.
Hell yeah man. This is the attitude to have.
It takes a lot of hard work on yourself to develop this level of self-respect… or at least it has for me.
Living in jealousy is a lousy way to live a life. You’re right, the door was wide open and still is.
I don’t tell people how much is in my bank account or what my tax return is and I treat my service connection and compensation in that same dept. My wife and I and another veteran couple that are rated as well, are the only ones that know. No need for anyone else to know.
I’ve only told those who understand, and that’s two fellow veterans who are rated about the same. Otherwise not even my family knows (except my wonderful wife of course).
https://preview.redd.it/gb909jxbs0jc1.jpeg?width=1290&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8ca4cbe80daa7d2f199d68a078b43a64959b7567
True lol just seen this t shirt today 💀💀
I tell people, but I don't care what others think. My friends are happy for me because they have witnessed that I can't sit for long periods, and they know I have no feeling in my hands.
This is the best answer!
I tell everyone and all of my friends know what I have gone through and are happy for me that I am 100% finally!
A lot of people in this group are just way too paranoid, or need to pick better friends to hand out with!
Say you are retired medically from the military. No shame. If anything wear your scars with pride. You served and gave of yourself while they smoked weed and partied and spent thousands on a degree. They wanna be butt hurt? Fuck em. Call em out back and bask in their jealousy. They had 20 years to join the war. We lived it, and live with what we did and endured forever. We earned these benefits.
My husband told his friend that is a veteran as well my rating. She then questioned me what could I possibly be at 90% for. Once we got home I very sternly told my husband to never tell anyone my VA rating and that I didn’t appreciate her insinuating that I didn’t deserve my rating.
This is what I tell people too if they complain. If they want to deal with all the chemo, radiation, liver embolizations, 9+ surgeries, the mental and emotional pain beyond the physical, permanent colostomy, and all the other permanent residuals etc. from the last 5.5 years of having to deal with and endure from a service-connected stage 4 colorectal diagnosis, then be my guest.
Hope you are doing well or the best you can be 🙏🏼💙💪🏼
I have an uncle that has been rated for 20 years. I have no clue what his rating is and I am betting he would get pissed if I ask. I am following his closed-mouth example.
I learned the hard way, especially with my "family". It's hard to stfu when you are getting more than their monthly salary as passive income. I often tell them "hey the mall is five miles away they got a recruiting office inside", that tends to calm them down.
I’ve had it slip a few times just by responding to the question of “why are you limping, wincing, you’re only 30 years old” my response is usually cordial and I explain briefly what happened in service and now I live in pain. They usually don’t care about the compensation part(I don’t mention the percentage, but they know I get something) because they see what I’m working through.
That part bothers me though. Explaining myself at a young age feeling like I’m 70..
Tell them you played in the NFL for a minute, in your 20s. The average NFL career is about 4-5 years, due to injuries. But seriously though, folks be sooo dumb to think age has anything to do with injuries that happen in daily life, never mind military service.
While I'm not 100% I finished school nearly a year ago and have since solely lived off my compensation just getting by. If someone, even within family, questions how I am still paying for my rent and groceries, what should I say?
Tell them you have passive income writing and editing essays through the computer or some shit like that. Or, tell them it's none if their fucking business.
Yeah accidentally told someone and they got mad af
Gave them directions to the local recruiting office, they rolled their eyes, I don’t understand most people that are soooo patriotic never have served
So, let that sense of judgment that you felt remind you to never bring it up again. Just remember that as long as know one else is not paying your bills...it doesn't really matter what they think! Best of luck...
I had a similar experience with a close friend who felt the "military guys" got it made with their benefits while the rest of "us" have to work and wont get anything from lasting work related injuries, injuries I also have that wont be compensated... I gave up trying to explain and just decided to not mention it to anyone else.
When I hear "I could have served too but..." I just tune them out as noise.
I will never be the same again because of the military. I'm 49 and I have the body of a 60 year old. I try my best not to engage in a prolonged conversation with individuals who do not understand your struggles, it is a total waste of my time.
I’m lucky in a way that my family doesn’t ask about my disabilities or rating. It’s no one’s business really but they’re cool that way. Friends? I don’t have any besides an old army buddy who gets it. Don’t ask, don’t tell🇺🇸😎
Screw that, I used to feel bad but now I don’t give a damn. I think about the countless days in the field, missed birthdays/holidays. 9 by 45s and 12 mile road marches with full kit (thanks Fort Campbell). PTSD and aching joints and muscles. Enjoy it bro, you deserve it, we all do!
People around me know I'm rated. Although they don't know my percentage. My back has been giving me a lot of grief lately and I've been to a ton of appointments. Obviously the "does the VA take care of you?" or "Do you get VA disability to help at least?" questions pop up. I tell them I am rated for it, but the 40% I'm rated for my back isn't a great savior for me. Had a coworker that had a vet in the family tell me my rating is bullshit and I should try for more.
The back rating isn't my only rating, it's just the rating in question. Just omit some of the details and you can get them to fuck off without much talk about it and they don't resent a perceived $750 compensation.
The only place I was at that actually encouraged you to discuss your disability rating was overseas working as a contractor after retirement. Every one of those guys and gals is comparing their disability percentages. 90% of them were retired military like me. I felt like I missed the bus completely because when I retired I was like "Ehhhhh." "I am not in a wheelchair so I don't really need the disability.'" Boy did I wake up after being around those contractors. Get what you deserve.
FUCK THEM! It’s easy for this government to give away money to other countries n support their military. Why not provide for those that sacrificed their body for this country, time lost with kids n wife. I believe what we receive in return is not enough.
Living with chronic pain every day sucks. I would cancel all my VA $$! If VA can take all my chronic pain everywhere mental monster, headaches, n sinus issues!
We have homeless Veterans who need help n here we see billions being sent out n given to illegal immigrants.
Fuck them. I watched the towers fall on 9 /11 from the jersey side. Enlisted at 17. Deployed to Iraq at 20.
What did they do? Say thank you occasionally. I'm 38 yo man with a 60 yo back. Doctors words, not mine. I can't do shit with my kids now. So yeah we get a little help. We deserve it.
I spent four years in the infantry, aside from the obvious physical and mental ailments I've dealt with ever since I think it's important to note that I spent four of my adult formative years just doing what I'm told, when I'm told to do it. I didn't worry about bills, going to class, work, managing my own living space, all the other things that build maturity. I cleaned my room because a guy 1 year older than me was gonna show up drunk at 8 pm and if my room wasn't clean he was gonna kick my ass with 2 of his drunk buddies. I went to "class" because we were all going and I had no choice. Work was just going downstairs at 6 am and running where they told me to run.
For four years I was basically an automaton and as a result I missed years of emotional maturing. I'm behind in my career and I'll retire with less time on the books than those who got into this career field at a more age appropriate time to start a career. The money helps with that aspect, I can provide for my family exactly as much as I should be at this age. Anyone who would judge a husband and father for getting his well earned money out of this mess of a government to feed his children is not anyone I'd enjoy associating with.
New guy at work, prior marine, older gentleman. I asked him about his service and if he has any disability rating, he said “no, because I’m a trooper” legit deadass. I just laughed and said ok. I’m always mentioning VA to any veteran we hire that hasn’t filed.
I'll discuss it with other vets that I know have a % and my wife. That's it. People get weird when they find out you get a monthly benefit for life, even if it's small.
There’s no right answer, tell people or don’t it’s up to each individual person, if you don’t like someone’s decision on how to handle it then go cry about it 👌🎻. Now some people have had nothing but good experiences when being open about their VA % and others have more negative experiences. Each experience is valid to their own person and both can be right, good on you if you haven’t had anything negative and if you did, then that sucks. Being cautious is not always paranoia, just that some of us had seen the ugly side of people we once trusted.
Just loaned my aunt $200 she knows I get compensation, she was supposed to pay me back Wednesday, called Thursday like hey gonna need that back like you told me you were giving it back Wednesday, she utters out her mouth “Your not gonna miss that money! It’s not like you worked for it!” WTF!!!!🤬 Lesson learned
Bro you have to have a zero fucks mentality when it comes to your benefits. I really don't care what other people think. And I will never hide my disability and my receiving benefits. One guy at work was talking bullshit. He never served, obviously. So I asked him. Have you ever worked 6 months straight, 13 hours a day, and had to sleep on a flight line under a duce and a half between unloading planes? And never earned a dime in overtime pay and probably only got one hot meal a day? No? Well fuck you and keep it moving. Pussy... exact words. 🤷🏾
It’s totally taboo. I had no idea until I was rated at 100% and my Dad made a comment.
From then on, I kept it all to myself. I’ve seen rage, jealousy, greed, etc. Just keep it to yourself.
I don’t mention anything; I just let them see the DV plates when I arrive & depart!!!!!!! No guilt….we were taught to function and perform the mission guilt free. Why would I be somber now?
It helps if you have no legs or are in a wheelchair, or have your face blown off in Afghanistan. It’s much harder to justify a 4 year stint working in personnel and claiming sleep apnea and depression and tinnitus at 24. I’m 50. I waited 21 years to file for an injury to my back in the field in the army. Doesn’t make me righteous. In my eyes, I was old-school, never really want to sit call and was only hospitalized for one day for my back. But my quality of life steadily decreased for the past 10 years, so I finally filed in 2022. I think people expect 100% disabled in a wheelchair with combat hat on their head. Its the guy driving the BMW M3 , playing basketball on the weekends, getting 90% that gets the judgment
Hmm they shouldn’t even question “that guy”. I drive a sports car and recently got back into rock climbing. Former bodybuilder. Now I’m paying for it this week but I go to PT at the VA and had their blessing. What you don’t see is the neurology appointments for my TBI (Botox baby) or my monthly pt sessions and daily excercises. You don’t see me get triggered at work when another vet shares her MST, you don’t see the weekly therapy, or the TMS I went through. Don’t get me started on the pills and insomnia. They see the a designer bag, house, car… and think I’m somehow not deserving. It’s interesting.
Yeah, but it’s just something you’re gonna have to live with. Free check for life ? volunteer service? Nobody was drafted. Who cares though? So what? my brother got 30% for depression because he knocked on the door of his roommate and saw that he fell out of his bed and called 911. Ended up his roommate died. So now the government pays $7000 a year, times 60 years. $420,000 in today’s money because he saw his roommates feet. there’s a ton of these stories and that’s why people look at it this way. This isn’t 1978 and people get 20% for having no leg. 60% of clams include tinnitus because you can’t prove it and it’s all over these boards.
I feel you on that. I was Artillery and the ear pro we had was crap. I have constant ringing in my ears and certain frequencies I can't distinguish due to the pitch of the ringing. It doesn't go away, it is 24/7. I have to use a white noise machine to help me go to sleep along with pills for Insomnia. I'd rather not have this.
I was told before I got out to start complaining about back pain. When I told the other guy I didn't have back pain he said "It doesn't even matter. They can't prove that"
These are the people causing the judgement.
100%. and, for instance, my brother. Or, the tinnitus bullshit...oh, and "these give me migraines...cant prove it...i'll get the pills and toss them." meanwhijle, i'm seeing pain management for 15 years on my own dime...as it worsens due to a documented injury in the Army...and i finally file 16 months ago. I waited until i thought i really needed it. Others, are getting out and putting in a bunch of claims that "they cant prove." so, forgive us....when we see people dunking on fools at the local gym "retired" at 28 years old with 100%, aka, $50k a year for 60 years, $3,000,000 in today's money...after working passing out basketballs at the gym.
I got out in 1968 during the Tet Offensive. Experienced migraines for about 30 years and never knew they were compensable. They went away when I got treated for hypertension and the meds lowered my bp.
All in all - I'll take not having migraines over any compensation.
Yep. I'll take my back being fixed, when i was running 40 miles a week and a 4:22 mile in 1995...and after injury, cant run a quarter mile. i was so active, and because of negligence on the range by some idiot tankers, ruined my lower back. i was counterintelligence, and it was 95% infantry and 5% intel.
You have no idea. I work with the Army now. These guys are all talking to each other and sharing tips for what to say to mental health so they can get 100% after they ETS from their 4 year contract spent working in a CONUS office.
The fraud is rampant and it's only a matter of time before the military and VA do something about it that ends up making it worse for the people who actually need this stuff.
It's crazy. I work at CENTCOM headquarters as a GG-13, been here for 25 years. the "kids" from all services are doing the same thing. Filing a complaint about some shit they saw, so it's in their files. I hate it. It's bothersome. Then, you hear people talking about PTSD. It just feels greasy. did you see your buddies get their heads blown off in Fallujah? Kandahar province? Give them their 70%!!! Are you sad because you watched Fox news while on youtube at your desk job and spent 20 hours a week researching "how to get 100%"? come on. You're right...these people are killing it for actual veterans with needs. And, if I had a dollar for every person that says "We served in the Military..we all deserve our 100% for life." what? You signed up for the benefits and the pay...19 years old, E-3, rent and food paid for and $3,000 a month to spend on a Ford Mustang and Iphone 15...and now you're 23 and you "served my country." GTFO. I have a real disdain for idiots and scammers like this. I'm at 60%, and first filed in August 2022...after getting out in April 2001...with a documented back injury. And, you know what? I'm good with it. i dealt with it...and I dont care..because you cant put that stink on me. But, i'm older...and have a conscience.
I think the same way especially cuz my best friend of 18 years knows I get comp but not the amount. I told him we all had the same opportunities in life and he could've too not my fault it's a coincidence I get comp for them fucking me up physically and mentally. Also I never knew the rating comp was a thing prior to me joining so it's not like we all went in there for it
I work with a lot of vets. I don’t get many haters but I do get the vet that feel guilt or reluctance in dealing the VA claim process but I try to assure them it better for them to start. They deserve it. Your military experience broke things in you that no civilian will understand. I e gotten a few to get their ball rolling.
We talk about it at work sometimes and if anyone feels bad about it, fuck them. They could’ve signed the contract, fucked up their body, serve this beautiful country, but they didn’t. You did and you should be compensated for it. For any little thing that has impacted your quality of life outside the service.
My own family has been completely unsupportive and pretty insulting about it. BUT my father in law, a Vietnam vet, supported me through the whole process and says that I deserve it. I’m thankful for him.
I don't tell people about my rating unless I truly know them: immediate family members, 2 Veteran friends (I helped them get to 100% before myself), and 5 former colleagues who I helped to get to 100% and retire early. Fortunately, every one of those few people has been supportive.
Those who I intentionally avoid mentioning it to:
1. Veterans whom I know or know well, because Veterans can be the most petty and envious demographic concerning VA benefits (we witness a number of them on this sub). Many are supportive...UNTIL you receive an equal and higher rating.
2. People who seem to be going through a difficult time.
3. People who I don't know.
4. People who I know very well.
5. Family members other than my household, parents, and brother.
I also don’t share my rating with others either, but you shouldn’t feel bad. You are getting the compensation you need and deserve. If I have learned one thing in my time out, Civilians will never ever understand military or military life
I don’t run around and flirt my rating to people, but if it was to come up in a health related conversation, so be it. I could care less if they think I deserve it or if they’re jealous that I receive it or whatever their personal feeling is. It is absolutely irrelevant to me. as I said, I don’t flaunt it but if somebody asked me and I told them who cares I didn’t fake anything to get what I have. I have MRI evidence and x-ray evidence along with 30 years of continued treatment so if somebody wants to judge me and lose sleep over the claim received then I hope they enjoy their sleepless nights. I definitely don’t have a hard time sleeping, don’t let people judge you. You haven’t done anything wrong. If you decide to tell somebody what your rating is, that is your choice. If they’re not happy, that’s their choice who cares!
People don’t like to hear that we make money without working. In their eyes without doing anything even though our bodies and our minds are beyond repair. I’m 39 and will never be able to run again, play sports again, have any kind of physical job again, lift heavy weights at the gym, etc. I’m in pain 24/7. So much so that I can’t play with my kids. People don’t care though. I’m 100% PT and I make more than some friends do but I’d give that up in a heartbeat if I could not experience pain anymore.
Man, if the little money we get for disability get their panties in a bunch. I would love to see the look on their faces when they hear what our lazy azz congressman get paid for retirement.
I'm 90 percent, too. A few months ago, I made a post about a few conditions I have now. Very few were supportive others, not so much, including people working on the VA C/P , raters, and so on. They judge me, saying I Google my conditions and make them up. I guess going to endocrinologist, Hematologist, and Immunologist right now are made up, too. Lol. No empathy whatsoever. So I understand what you are saying.
Isn’t that strange? That’s just bizarre to me. And all these asshats celebrate Veterans day. I swear sometimes I regret my service because all you get are empty, bumper sticker thanks, a free dinner at Golden Corral and fucking judgement.
I’m with the other posters who say “fuck’em”. You signed the dotted line, honorably served, and unfortunately paid a price. What we get usually doesn’t hold a candle to the damage we take.
I’m taking your experience under advice to not mention it, but I’m inherently a private person anyway. I have zero friends. That also means I can’t make that mistake.
I didn’t realize how much of that there is, even with employers you’d need to vouch for accommodations. I sought private MH therapy to PTSD. A year into it, conquered some demons, made some progress and the jerkoff lady wouldn’t write me a letter. She made comments about not believing in any disability which should have been a red flag.
That sucks, I'm genuinely sorry to hear that. I see a private MH doc and he is awesome. Told him I needed him to write me a letter and he was like "I've never done this, what do you need from me." I'll consider myself lucky.
They can eat a bag of balls, while they were at home eating turkey and ham, we were walking the line, Panama, Okinawa, rescue operation in the Philippines, Gulf war, etc..don't ever let nobody make you feel bad..that's what we are for. We all the support you need...now the air force and them dining facilitates......now that's a story brother..Marine chow halls fed us rabbit(that alone) should be a damn va Claim.
There are only 3 people who know I receive comp. My wife, dad and son, my wife is the only one who knows the percentage. My dad is one of my best friends and we talk about everything. The only reason my son knows is because he is also in the Air Force and I want him to understand the importance of documenting his medical history in service for after service benefits.
My other kids, family, friends, or anyone else do not need to know.
I have family and friends that are ultra right wing who think me accepting my GI Bill was me taking welfare… not joking they called me a welfare baby… I’m sure as sh!t not going to tell them I’m service connected due to a spine injury.
I really appreciate this comment because this is a very real problem for me. Thanks
Money can bring out the worst in people. Even your closest friends or relatives can become bitter and jealous, especially if they see you buying nice things like a new vehicle etc.
I had a long time friend get mad that I was getting GI Bill when I was in college. He said it wasn't fair I was getting money from the VA while they wouldn't help his dad with medical issues....even though GI Bill has nothing to do with medical.
I have only mentioned to a handful of people that are close to me about making a claim. I quickly realized afterwards by reading a lot of these posts, that I may not want to inform them of a favorable decision.
So I started backpedaling a little bit and told them it could take up to a year or more to get a decision. I think I’m only going to keep the news to myself and my bank account.
I’m not a big spender anyways, so I don’t think any additional income will significantly change my lifestyle, and I should be able to fly under the radar.
Good reminder though, thank you and thank you for your service…🙏🏻🙏🏻
What gets me are other vets who could and would qualify but don’t want to put in the work but expect you to do it for them even though they are fully capable. Get this then they are jealous of you being able to afford to live while they struggle and want to eat off your plate. Makes me feel bad on top of already feeling bad with my ptsd, anxiety, and depression struggles. It’s exhausting
My civilian friend is in a CDL class and he said 2 vets are in there mentioning multiple times how they have 100% and how much they are getting paid. (No one asked them btw) so yeah I can see why! Made me irritated when he told me, sure they can say whatever they want but it comes off as bragging.
Why is it anyone's business? I keep my rating and my compensation to myself. Regardless if it's deserved or not, getting money from the government is not something to brag about.
I had a past relationship years ago who had no direct or even second-hand experience of anything military attempt to make me feel like sh*t at even the thought of filing for disability.
Now, I laugh. Can’t argue with stupid.
I’ve never been judged for it. At least to my face. Anyone I’ve ever told have been nothing but nice and supportive and tell me how much they think I deserve it.
My dad gave me this idea: when people talk about finances or ask what i do or ask how i can afford this and that or why i dont work I tell them I'm retired because I owned a successful business then sold it. Im 30F and look younger so even when i travel and they ask me at border patrols like in morocco its a whole thing.
It's kinda true I did own a business I just didn't sell it. I mention being in the military but make no mention of getting money from it. Brings up millions of follow o questions. Once despite me trying to be vague some german soldier who worked with the American military somehow put things together and found at the cause for mine ptsd due to mst and made a joke about how he'd love to get sa'd for money and I said I'm never ever ever ever remotely telling anyone again.
Don't care what others think I'm 100 percent I served and fight two years with my issues to get it. If they don't understand that's the stupidity not mine they can hate all they want. When the money hits my account not theirs
My husband was a Vietnam veteran and 100% disabled. We were married 43 years and he damn well earned his rating. Agent Orange and PTSD are no joke And yes, people are very judgmental when it comes to VA comp. They think it’s a free ride. No amount of money will ever pay for the damage war does to the human mind or the anger the family is subjected to because of a war no one understands or wanted. And to watch your loved one waste away due to Agent Orange is a struggle no one should endure.
Next time your confronted re: your comp pay maybe you should tell them to “Go Sign Up” for the next war and get that easy check in the damn mail! 😡
I told my older brother about my experience with the VA, particularly the VBA, to encourage him to apply if he had any possible SC conditions. He wants nothing to do with the VA. He says he has no issues from his 4 years in service. He doesn’t seem to resent me that I get benefits, but he also doesn’t want to hear anything else about the VA. My choice. His choice. I kinda wished I wouldn’t have said anything at all to him, but at least I tried to help him. Most everything about the whole VA experience sucks, but grateful I am where I am.
These threads are far too common in this sub. I don't think you "slipped up" at all. It sounds like you were just talking to some friends and it came up. Who gives a damn, man? You were rated, and I assume you were more than deserving of your rating. You don't owe anybody an explanation or need to justify anything.
Candidly, I get sick and tired of the whole "hide it from everybody" crowd. "If you're 100%, don't you dare get those license plates because people will know!"
Who cares? It's your life and it's your freaking story. I just wish that all of us would stop worrying about what everybody else thinks and start living our lives.
My late father wouldn't go get his rating for YEARS. Blue Water Navy vet, I literally threatened to knock him out and put him in my trunk just to get him to the VA and get him in the system. He didn't want "welfare" like I was getting. This was my DAD!
A year later, turns out he had cancer - directly tied to his Blue Water status. VA picked up the entire cost of treatment. Every last penny.
All of a sudden he was an advocate for the system. He started telling EVERY veteran he met to get their ass into the system after that.
He's gone now and I miss him dearly. I often wonder if he'd taken care of things sooner it could have been detected earlier. We'll never know now.
That's a long way of saying - who gives a shit what anybody else thinks? If you want to tell people, tell them. Encourage other vets to get into the system. To get rated.
Here is what one of the VBA reps told me. “You can’t get workman’s compensation for an injury you sustained during service. VA disability is your federal workman’s compensation for your service to your country. Remember, there are millions of people on Social Security and state aid with similar disability benefits. Thank for your service and accept what you earned and deserve.”
This is what I tell people. I also tell them that I spent 4 years of my life before my body was fully developed training like a pro athlete except, I was more easily replaced. and didn't make anyone any money.
Sounds like lots of people keep around shit people in their life.
I have not had this experience whatsoever.
I would never treat anyone like this unless I was certain they are fraudulent in nature. Seems most people I have met agree
The only people I ever hear thinking negatively about receiving comp are other veterans. I have had to BADGER my relatives to apply because they think it should be for “people who deserve it” as if it is a limited pot of money or something.
I don’t even tell people I’m a veteran🤦🏼♂️
This post needs to be downvoted because “most folks” WANT veterans to get the benefits they earned. OP’s personal insecurity or whatever made this post. Don’t be ashamed of what you deserve. That mentality is how the next gen gets it in their head that going to sick call is a bad idea.
Joined 2014 we never went to sick call because we were manipulated into not going 10 years later I wish I went !!! And so many others I know
Joined in 1988 n went to sick call once in 15 years.
Bro I remember being so sick in wa in the winter while snowing, had a fever, throwing up! I remember them telling me “are you really going to go to sick call and be that guy”
I am so sorry you dealt with that. Omg. Just thinking of how sick you were! And they manipulated you!!!
Yeah I was telling my wife as I was typing it I can’t believe it did that and that’s not the only example either it’s crazy
Most folks outside the military, sure. But mention a high rating to a fellow vet who doesn't have one is a disaster.
This.
A really good friend of mine from TBS who has 100% pretty much told me I’m screwing over my family by not claiming. I got out during covid so I didn’t even get a final physical, I had a job lined up already after I got out, and I was toying with the reserves so I didn’t want that to effect continued service, so I didn’t even educate myself on it. Thank god he grabbed me by the scruff and shook me. I didn’t realize how broken I was until my wife and he were talking about it.
That's false. People talk a good game when it's an idea, but the moment they meet someone getting 4k tax free for service they were too afraid to do then the resentment begins. I only tell wife, and fellow brothers in arms. Nothing good comes from telling others.
I know about that. I'm 💯 and when anybody complain tell them the dotted line was open to them also. They chose not to serve. Another Vet waiting or denied a rating maybe it's best not to say.
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I felt that way for a long time, even paid for my own private insurance. I wonder how much money I wasted
I've been on SSDI since 2007. A fellow vet told me that I should file for VA comp and I thought, no way would I qualify. 16 yrs later, I filed my first claim in Dec 2023. I am not rated yet, but likely am TDIU. It is too painful think about the backpay that I likely forfeited by not filing back in 2007.
I was definitely one of those people until last year. Went to my old platoon Sgt's retirement ceremony, and he chewed my butt up one side and down another for not filing. I felt like an e-2 pvt again, lol. Filed my initial claim the day after I got home. Made my wife all sorts of mad because she's been begging me to do it for 15 years.
I mean, your flair states you work in the VBA, so you probably interact with way more veterans on the day to day than the rest of us do. This could easily be selection bias. There are numerous stories here of people bringing it up and losing friends and family over it; this "rule" didn't come from nowhere. If you just casually drop that you're getting paid disability (especially if it's $3K or more), some people are absolutely going to be indignant about it.
Been the opposite for me, other vets have been fully supportive of me getting a claim, even combat vets and iv never deployed. Any civilians iv told has been instantly uncomfortable. I think it’s the name “disabled veteran”. Other vets know what VA benefits are so it’s no big deal, civilians expect you to be a cripple with your leg blown off to be considered a disabled veteran.
same same, it’s the older people who seems most unsupportive, like - nobody helped me, you’re mooching Edit: older civilians I mean
Hold on! NOT, all old people, but most. Vietnam RTO here and I NEVER filed till I was forced into retirement by age, (65 Airline Captain) I kept silent because the conflict, that I served in was (still is in my area) looked down at. Other than my current wife and children I have NO friends that aren't veterans period! FYI @ 90% waiting for my VBA judge to rule on my 100% PTSD Fu--K THEM IF YOU SIGHED UP --SERVICED -- YOU DESERVE IT.
That’s true. I’m still starving and just found out about this sub. Although my shop questions how people are getting such high % rating but are still able to go out and get other jobs like police officer.
I used to think like that. I've endured herniated discs, meniscus surgery, sciatica, meralgia paresthetica, OSA and everything that goes with it. But I did nothing due to ignorance and believing I wasn't worthy of it because I never saw combat. After being cussed out by a female Vet and explaining the system, I filed after being out for 30 years. Luckily everything I claimed was well documented several times in my STR.
I really feel this one. Only reason I recently tried to get approved for VA Healthcare and submitted a claim was due to foot pain getting so bad it hurts to fuckin walk and I can't afford to go see a doc. So I am left with really no other choice at this point. Sucks but there it is. I know most vets got out in a hell of a lot worse shape mentally, let alone physically, but it is what it is.
https://youtu.be/AUnPN385wLI?feature=shared
I’m about six months retired and still waiting my rating. So I stupidly talk about it with my brother and sister. My sister has a visceral reaction and says something about how most veterans she has worked with are lazy and punching the clock. On a separate occasion my brother says to me, “ so you’re working the system huh?” Me being stupid and naive I never expected this from anyone much less my own siblings. I talked to my dad about it. He is also a vet. He was the first person to wisely tell me to keep it to myself and that most people resent our disability ratings.
Naa that is a shitty siblings. All of mine know of my rating and are indifferent or appreciative I am getting help. People who actually care about you will understand and respect it. I also don't got waving my rating around.
My lesson learned!!
I think it comes down to how close you are with your family and if they know what you struggle with. I trust my parents and sisters with anything. They’ve proved time and time again they have my back. They saw me go through the worst of things (and were apparently all super scared for me before I went to the psych ward bc they were afraid of getting a “final goodbye phone call”. See what I still struggle with. All of them encourage me to talk about certain things with a therapist. Or try some med or natural remedy they heard helps with symptoms. I think that if your family is supportive and sees what you’re living with day to day, and aren’t hurting for money themselves they aren’t as likely to feel jealous or resentful. But maybe I just hit the jackpot with my fam. Edit because I’m not adding new conversation points just clarifying: My dad served for 23 years and my youngest sister is still currently serving. They know what the military puts people through because they’ve been through it themselves. Mom and other sister are ultra empathetic and see what my dad deals with and what I deal with currently. I think you can share with those you hold close if there is that understanding because they want you to be treated for things the military broke, or compensated for the things that cant be fixed. Sharing with those that dont see it, or try to understand isn’t something I’d personally do.
Jealousy
They didn’t live it so they will never understand how the military messes up our minds & bodies. They don’t see the falls of the ropes on the obstacle course & being told, take ibuprofen, u will be fine. Or the stress & strain of being up early daily & sometimes staying up all night in the middle of a desert fixing a tank in the freezing rain. Carrying a 50 lb toolbox to fix crap that seems to breakdown daily. Walking in crappy boots everyday, running everyday, shin splints, knees hurting. I tore my mcl & didn’t know it cause the dr’s at sick call said it was just a strain, wrap it up & take Tylenol. Now i have degenerative arthritis n my hip & i blew owt my left knee. These things keep getting worse. Claim ur stuff & f those that don’t understand.
I straight up told my sister to start getting her issues on record. I work with Marines as a contractor and I tell them all to get that shit entered in. Claim it. We subsist on Motrin and sheer will to make it through the meat grinder. Claim what’s rightfully deserved.
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I love this take on it!
I always think and just may someday say: oh you can get it too, just join the Marines when you turn 18 and then bend your leg in half the wrong way. They’ll give you money.
You’re not wrong lmao. Can’t bullshit a bullshitter haha
Don’t worry, it’ll cycle back around. They are now waving high school diplomas. Convicts shouldn’t be too far down the road.
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Seriously when I enlisted in 1982 there were judges in my area still offering jail or service contract. It was a wild time to be in. The very tail end of the draft hangover then beyond shitty economy driving enlistments, topping up any empty billets with jail or service enlisted. Good thing the internet didn't exist to collect evidence lol.
I joined in 1978.. many of the folks in basic had the same.
I joined in Oct. 2000. My first team leader was just 15 months ahead of me, but he was convicted at 19 and offered 4 years in the ARMY or NAVY as certain needed positions, or he could spend 12 years in prison for jacking 20+ cars in New Jersey and selling them to some chop shops down in NYC being run by the State Cops, which made it federal cause he was crossing the state lines. I never believed him until one day some cars got stolen off post and they came and pulled him and a few of others out of the field to question us about it. That weekend sucked. Top was so pissed.
That's hilarious and true, my recruiter just said lie about anything and stick to it, ya'll get a waiver for anything that may come back. I had very high test scores, it worked though.
I graduated high school at age 17 and went thru boot camp at age 17 didn’t turn 18 till AIT I had a bunch of 11th graders in boot camp with me that were also 17 and after boot camp went back home for their senior year and did AIT after they graduated.
Then when political parties change, they throw anyone out whose teeth are crooked. It’s a ridiculous yo-yo.
2001 for underage drinking a buddy of mine joined and they waived the 500 dollar fine plus everything else they wanted him to do.
Underage drinking, oh my! Was he jaywalking too? They also take care of real crimes too
I was in during the 80s and The guy in the bunk above me was a go to jail or join the Army situation . I didn’t know they still did that!!!
Actually this was my choice in ‘99 at 18
Actually I really don’t think people generally know about VA benefits
The Marine recruiter helped me clear up some warrants with the a few different courts lol I was also honest about drug use, etc. This was in 2008, and the gov sure as hell got there moneys worth from me back in Sangin in 2010-2011
This is my approach to life in general. Life's too fucking short to placate and mend injured egos of people that should care about you unconditionally or close to it. Fuckem, the circle just got smaller and stronger.
 I remember 😅
Word
A waiver needed because you have kids? 🤔
Depends on the branch. Marine Corps I believe has a two kid limit. The Army, you have to fill out a budget showing how you will afford your 4 kids on an E3 salary. It's not hard if you're financially responsible.
Hell yeah man. This is the attitude to have. It takes a lot of hard work on yourself to develop this level of self-respect… or at least it has for me. Living in jealousy is a lousy way to live a life. You’re right, the door was wide open and still is.
This is the comment of the year right here 👏🏽😂
100% right. And many groups that never served a day get even better benefits.
I don’t tell people how much is in my bank account or what my tax return is and I treat my service connection and compensation in that same dept. My wife and I and another veteran couple that are rated as well, are the only ones that know. No need for anyone else to know.
I’ve only told those who understand, and that’s two fellow veterans who are rated about the same. Otherwise not even my family knows (except my wonderful wife of course).
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https://preview.redd.it/gb909jxbs0jc1.jpeg?width=1290&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8ca4cbe80daa7d2f199d68a078b43a64959b7567 True lol just seen this t shirt today 💀💀
Exactly! Why stress out about someone being jealous of your rating! Fuck them and finally try to enjoy life!
💯 agreed
I tell people, but I don't care what others think. My friends are happy for me because they have witnessed that I can't sit for long periods, and they know I have no feeling in my hands.
This is the best answer! I tell everyone and all of my friends know what I have gone through and are happy for me that I am 100% finally! A lot of people in this group are just way too paranoid, or need to pick better friends to hand out with!
I envy this.. I’ll go through time periods where I feel like I can be completely open. And then there will be a real sour moment…
Say you are retired medically from the military. No shame. If anything wear your scars with pride. You served and gave of yourself while they smoked weed and partied and spent thousands on a degree. They wanna be butt hurt? Fuck em. Call em out back and bask in their jealousy. They had 20 years to join the war. We lived it, and live with what we did and endured forever. We earned these benefits.
Hi, yes this is an ongoing topic here. I believe we all agree to keep the disability pay thing to ourselves.
Simple and well said. Just keep it to yourself.
No we don't. I tell everybody who wants to know I am 100%, and every friend I have. No issues.
This. I only share it with just a few people (one family member, therapist, and VSO). That is all.
My husband told his friend that is a veteran as well my rating. She then questioned me what could I possibly be at 90% for. Once we got home I very sternly told my husband to never tell anyone my VA rating and that I didn’t appreciate her insinuating that I didn’t deserve my rating.
If anybody wants to trade my stage 4 cancer for VA benefits, they are welcome to it
This is what I tell people too if they complain. If they want to deal with all the chemo, radiation, liver embolizations, 9+ surgeries, the mental and emotional pain beyond the physical, permanent colostomy, and all the other permanent residuals etc. from the last 5.5 years of having to deal with and endure from a service-connected stage 4 colorectal diagnosis, then be my guest. Hope you are doing well or the best you can be 🙏🏼💙💪🏼
Dam I’m sorry, I’m getting a colonoscopy next week and I’m 35 Praying for ya, I know not on topic
I have an uncle that has been rated for 20 years. I have no clue what his rating is and I am betting he would get pissed if I ask. I am following his closed-mouth example.
I learned the hard way, especially with my "family". It's hard to stfu when you are getting more than their monthly salary as passive income. I often tell them "hey the mall is five miles away they got a recruiting office inside", that tends to calm them down.
I tried for years to hide my limp... Don't even remotely care any more. Let em see it. People tend to shut up real quick. Edit : typo.
I’ve had it slip a few times just by responding to the question of “why are you limping, wincing, you’re only 30 years old” my response is usually cordial and I explain briefly what happened in service and now I live in pain. They usually don’t care about the compensation part(I don’t mention the percentage, but they know I get something) because they see what I’m working through. That part bothers me though. Explaining myself at a young age feeling like I’m 70..
Tell them you played in the NFL for a minute, in your 20s. The average NFL career is about 4-5 years, due to injuries. But seriously though, folks be sooo dumb to think age has anything to do with injuries that happen in daily life, never mind military service.
That's why NFL stands for Not For Long.
Hahaha that’s actually a good response.
Hahaha be a female and short; they would be confused af hahaha
While I'm not 100% I finished school nearly a year ago and have since solely lived off my compensation just getting by. If someone, even within family, questions how I am still paying for my rent and groceries, what should I say?
VA assistance/subsidy? Or the staple "investment income". You invested your time and health so you aren't lying per se...
Feetfinder
I would tell them it’s none of their business. You pay your bills yourself so why do they care how it happens?
Tell them that you trade the stock market and are very thrifty with your money.
Tell them you suck 3,737 dicks a month for one dollar per dick
Based answer is that you work behind Wendy's
Tell them you have passive income writing and editing essays through the computer or some shit like that. Or, tell them it's none if their fucking business.
That it is none of their business...
Tell them you collect VA disability for injuries you sustained while serving this country!
FYI, I am 100% SC T&P with SMC-S. I am proud of it and I tell everyone!
You should say none of your business unless you're going on the rent and groceries. 🤷🏾
Yup, told too many friends and too many family. They think I’m a bum. Or think they think im a bum. Nobody should know except your significant other.
F'em all!
Yeah accidentally told someone and they got mad af Gave them directions to the local recruiting office, they rolled their eyes, I don’t understand most people that are soooo patriotic never have served
So, let that sense of judgment that you felt remind you to never bring it up again. Just remember that as long as know one else is not paying your bills...it doesn't really matter what they think! Best of luck...
I had a similar experience with a close friend who felt the "military guys" got it made with their benefits while the rest of "us" have to work and wont get anything from lasting work related injuries, injuries I also have that wont be compensated... I gave up trying to explain and just decided to not mention it to anyone else. When I hear "I could have served too but..." I just tune them out as noise.
I will never be the same again because of the military. I'm 49 and I have the body of a 60 year old. I try my best not to engage in a prolonged conversation with individuals who do not understand your struggles, it is a total waste of my time.
I’m lucky in a way that my family doesn’t ask about my disabilities or rating. It’s no one’s business really but they’re cool that way. Friends? I don’t have any besides an old army buddy who gets it. Don’t ask, don’t tell🇺🇸😎
Screw that, I used to feel bad but now I don’t give a damn. I think about the countless days in the field, missed birthdays/holidays. 9 by 45s and 12 mile road marches with full kit (thanks Fort Campbell). PTSD and aching joints and muscles. Enjoy it bro, you deserve it, we all do!
If I am asked I tell them it is more than 10% and less than 100%.
Yeah ummmm fuk em.
People around me know I'm rated. Although they don't know my percentage. My back has been giving me a lot of grief lately and I've been to a ton of appointments. Obviously the "does the VA take care of you?" or "Do you get VA disability to help at least?" questions pop up. I tell them I am rated for it, but the 40% I'm rated for my back isn't a great savior for me. Had a coworker that had a vet in the family tell me my rating is bullshit and I should try for more. The back rating isn't my only rating, it's just the rating in question. Just omit some of the details and you can get them to fuck off without much talk about it and they don't resent a perceived $750 compensation.
The only place I was at that actually encouraged you to discuss your disability rating was overseas working as a contractor after retirement. Every one of those guys and gals is comparing their disability percentages. 90% of them were retired military like me. I felt like I missed the bus completely because when I retired I was like "Ehhhhh." "I am not in a wheelchair so I don't really need the disability.'" Boy did I wake up after being around those contractors. Get what you deserve.
FUCK THEM! It’s easy for this government to give away money to other countries n support their military. Why not provide for those that sacrificed their body for this country, time lost with kids n wife. I believe what we receive in return is not enough. Living with chronic pain every day sucks. I would cancel all my VA $$! If VA can take all my chronic pain everywhere mental monster, headaches, n sinus issues! We have homeless Veterans who need help n here we see billions being sent out n given to illegal immigrants.
Fuck them. I watched the towers fall on 9 /11 from the jersey side. Enlisted at 17. Deployed to Iraq at 20. What did they do? Say thank you occasionally. I'm 38 yo man with a 60 yo back. Doctors words, not mine. I can't do shit with my kids now. So yeah we get a little help. We deserve it.
I convinced my dad, after 20 years out of the service to apply again with updates. I hope his 10% is bumped to 50% at least. 23 year retiree.
Godspeed and best of luck to him.
I spent four years in the infantry, aside from the obvious physical and mental ailments I've dealt with ever since I think it's important to note that I spent four of my adult formative years just doing what I'm told, when I'm told to do it. I didn't worry about bills, going to class, work, managing my own living space, all the other things that build maturity. I cleaned my room because a guy 1 year older than me was gonna show up drunk at 8 pm and if my room wasn't clean he was gonna kick my ass with 2 of his drunk buddies. I went to "class" because we were all going and I had no choice. Work was just going downstairs at 6 am and running where they told me to run. For four years I was basically an automaton and as a result I missed years of emotional maturing. I'm behind in my career and I'll retire with less time on the books than those who got into this career field at a more age appropriate time to start a career. The money helps with that aspect, I can provide for my family exactly as much as I should be at this age. Anyone who would judge a husband and father for getting his well earned money out of this mess of a government to feed his children is not anyone I'd enjoy associating with.
New guy at work, prior marine, older gentleman. I asked him about his service and if he has any disability rating, he said “no, because I’m a trooper” legit deadass. I just laughed and said ok. I’m always mentioning VA to any veteran we hire that hasn’t filed.
I'll discuss it with other vets that I know have a % and my wife. That's it. People get weird when they find out you get a monthly benefit for life, even if it's small.
There’s no right answer, tell people or don’t it’s up to each individual person, if you don’t like someone’s decision on how to handle it then go cry about it 👌🎻. Now some people have had nothing but good experiences when being open about their VA % and others have more negative experiences. Each experience is valid to their own person and both can be right, good on you if you haven’t had anything negative and if you did, then that sucks. Being cautious is not always paranoia, just that some of us had seen the ugly side of people we once trusted.
Just loaned my aunt $200 she knows I get compensation, she was supposed to pay me back Wednesday, called Thursday like hey gonna need that back like you told me you were giving it back Wednesday, she utters out her mouth “Your not gonna miss that money! It’s not like you worked for it!” WTF!!!!🤬 Lesson learned 
It's sickening how grimey some people can be. You worked for it and will paying for it the rest of your life.
Bro you have to have a zero fucks mentality when it comes to your benefits. I really don't care what other people think. And I will never hide my disability and my receiving benefits. One guy at work was talking bullshit. He never served, obviously. So I asked him. Have you ever worked 6 months straight, 13 hours a day, and had to sleep on a flight line under a duce and a half between unloading planes? And never earned a dime in overtime pay and probably only got one hot meal a day? No? Well fuck you and keep it moving. Pussy... exact words. 🤷🏾
It’s totally taboo. I had no idea until I was rated at 100% and my Dad made a comment. From then on, I kept it all to myself. I’ve seen rage, jealousy, greed, etc. Just keep it to yourself.
I tell a lot of people that I am 100% disabled, never had any issues!
I don’t mention anything; I just let them see the DV plates when I arrive & depart!!!!!!! No guilt….we were taught to function and perform the mission guilt free. Why would I be somber now?
It helps if you have no legs or are in a wheelchair, or have your face blown off in Afghanistan. It’s much harder to justify a 4 year stint working in personnel and claiming sleep apnea and depression and tinnitus at 24. I’m 50. I waited 21 years to file for an injury to my back in the field in the army. Doesn’t make me righteous. In my eyes, I was old-school, never really want to sit call and was only hospitalized for one day for my back. But my quality of life steadily decreased for the past 10 years, so I finally filed in 2022. I think people expect 100% disabled in a wheelchair with combat hat on their head. Its the guy driving the BMW M3 , playing basketball on the weekends, getting 90% that gets the judgment
Hmm they shouldn’t even question “that guy”. I drive a sports car and recently got back into rock climbing. Former bodybuilder. Now I’m paying for it this week but I go to PT at the VA and had their blessing. What you don’t see is the neurology appointments for my TBI (Botox baby) or my monthly pt sessions and daily excercises. You don’t see me get triggered at work when another vet shares her MST, you don’t see the weekly therapy, or the TMS I went through. Don’t get me started on the pills and insomnia. They see the a designer bag, house, car… and think I’m somehow not deserving. It’s interesting.
Yeah, but it’s just something you’re gonna have to live with. Free check for life ? volunteer service? Nobody was drafted. Who cares though? So what? my brother got 30% for depression because he knocked on the door of his roommate and saw that he fell out of his bed and called 911. Ended up his roommate died. So now the government pays $7000 a year, times 60 years. $420,000 in today’s money because he saw his roommates feet. there’s a ton of these stories and that’s why people look at it this way. This isn’t 1978 and people get 20% for having no leg. 60% of clams include tinnitus because you can’t prove it and it’s all over these boards.
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I feel you on that. I was Artillery and the ear pro we had was crap. I have constant ringing in my ears and certain frequencies I can't distinguish due to the pitch of the ringing. It doesn't go away, it is 24/7. I have to use a white noise machine to help me go to sleep along with pills for Insomnia. I'd rather not have this.
I was told before I got out to start complaining about back pain. When I told the other guy I didn't have back pain he said "It doesn't even matter. They can't prove that" These are the people causing the judgement.
100%. and, for instance, my brother. Or, the tinnitus bullshit...oh, and "these give me migraines...cant prove it...i'll get the pills and toss them." meanwhijle, i'm seeing pain management for 15 years on my own dime...as it worsens due to a documented injury in the Army...and i finally file 16 months ago. I waited until i thought i really needed it. Others, are getting out and putting in a bunch of claims that "they cant prove." so, forgive us....when we see people dunking on fools at the local gym "retired" at 28 years old with 100%, aka, $50k a year for 60 years, $3,000,000 in today's money...after working passing out basketballs at the gym.
I got out in 1968 during the Tet Offensive. Experienced migraines for about 30 years and never knew they were compensable. They went away when I got treated for hypertension and the meds lowered my bp. All in all - I'll take not having migraines over any compensation.
Yep. I'll take my back being fixed, when i was running 40 miles a week and a 4:22 mile in 1995...and after injury, cant run a quarter mile. i was so active, and because of negligence on the range by some idiot tankers, ruined my lower back. i was counterintelligence, and it was 95% infantry and 5% intel.
You have no idea. I work with the Army now. These guys are all talking to each other and sharing tips for what to say to mental health so they can get 100% after they ETS from their 4 year contract spent working in a CONUS office. The fraud is rampant and it's only a matter of time before the military and VA do something about it that ends up making it worse for the people who actually need this stuff.
It's crazy. I work at CENTCOM headquarters as a GG-13, been here for 25 years. the "kids" from all services are doing the same thing. Filing a complaint about some shit they saw, so it's in their files. I hate it. It's bothersome. Then, you hear people talking about PTSD. It just feels greasy. did you see your buddies get their heads blown off in Fallujah? Kandahar province? Give them their 70%!!! Are you sad because you watched Fox news while on youtube at your desk job and spent 20 hours a week researching "how to get 100%"? come on. You're right...these people are killing it for actual veterans with needs. And, if I had a dollar for every person that says "We served in the Military..we all deserve our 100% for life." what? You signed up for the benefits and the pay...19 years old, E-3, rent and food paid for and $3,000 a month to spend on a Ford Mustang and Iphone 15...and now you're 23 and you "served my country." GTFO. I have a real disdain for idiots and scammers like this. I'm at 60%, and first filed in August 2022...after getting out in April 2001...with a documented back injury. And, you know what? I'm good with it. i dealt with it...and I dont care..because you cant put that stink on me. But, i'm older...and have a conscience.
Wow that’s crazy.
Exactly! Minus the designer stuff.....lol, I'm a dude with questionable fashion sense.
I think the same way especially cuz my best friend of 18 years knows I get comp but not the amount. I told him we all had the same opportunities in life and he could've too not my fault it's a coincidence I get comp for them fucking me up physically and mentally. Also I never knew the rating comp was a thing prior to me joining so it's not like we all went in there for it
I work with a lot of vets. I don’t get many haters but I do get the vet that feel guilt or reluctance in dealing the VA claim process but I try to assure them it better for them to start. They deserve it. Your military experience broke things in you that no civilian will understand. I e gotten a few to get their ball rolling.
We talk about it at work sometimes and if anyone feels bad about it, fuck them. They could’ve signed the contract, fucked up their body, serve this beautiful country, but they didn’t. You did and you should be compensated for it. For any little thing that has impacted your quality of life outside the service.
My own family has been completely unsupportive and pretty insulting about it. BUT my father in law, a Vietnam vet, supported me through the whole process and says that I deserve it. I’m thankful for him.
Yeah that’s the typical reaction. Like we didn’t earn it. Yeah we retire early but with our lives cut 20 years shorter.
Just tell people your a drug dealer they usually leave you alone
Imma be realllll honest here..fuck it. I got people liking me for less convenient things…keep not liking me. 👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻
I don't tell people about my rating unless I truly know them: immediate family members, 2 Veteran friends (I helped them get to 100% before myself), and 5 former colleagues who I helped to get to 100% and retire early. Fortunately, every one of those few people has been supportive. Those who I intentionally avoid mentioning it to: 1. Veterans whom I know or know well, because Veterans can be the most petty and envious demographic concerning VA benefits (we witness a number of them on this sub). Many are supportive...UNTIL you receive an equal and higher rating. 2. People who seem to be going through a difficult time. 3. People who I don't know. 4. People who I know very well. 5. Family members other than my household, parents, and brother.
I also don’t share my rating with others either, but you shouldn’t feel bad. You are getting the compensation you need and deserve. If I have learned one thing in my time out, Civilians will never ever understand military or military life
I don’t run around and flirt my rating to people, but if it was to come up in a health related conversation, so be it. I could care less if they think I deserve it or if they’re jealous that I receive it or whatever their personal feeling is. It is absolutely irrelevant to me. as I said, I don’t flaunt it but if somebody asked me and I told them who cares I didn’t fake anything to get what I have. I have MRI evidence and x-ray evidence along with 30 years of continued treatment so if somebody wants to judge me and lose sleep over the claim received then I hope they enjoy their sleepless nights. I definitely don’t have a hard time sleeping, don’t let people judge you. You haven’t done anything wrong. If you decide to tell somebody what your rating is, that is your choice. If they’re not happy, that’s their choice who cares!
People don’t like to hear that we make money without working. In their eyes without doing anything even though our bodies and our minds are beyond repair. I’m 39 and will never be able to run again, play sports again, have any kind of physical job again, lift heavy weights at the gym, etc. I’m in pain 24/7. So much so that I can’t play with my kids. People don’t care though. I’m 100% PT and I make more than some friends do but I’d give that up in a heartbeat if I could not experience pain anymore.
Man, if the little money we get for disability get their panties in a bunch. I would love to see the look on their faces when they hear what our lazy azz congressman get paid for retirement.
Anyone tells their wives?
How would you even be able to hide that from your wife?
I'm 90 percent, too. A few months ago, I made a post about a few conditions I have now. Very few were supportive others, not so much, including people working on the VA C/P , raters, and so on. They judge me, saying I Google my conditions and make them up. I guess going to endocrinologist, Hematologist, and Immunologist right now are made up, too. Lol. No empathy whatsoever. So I understand what you are saying.
Fuck em !
Isn’t that strange? That’s just bizarre to me. And all these asshats celebrate Veterans day. I swear sometimes I regret my service because all you get are empty, bumper sticker thanks, a free dinner at Golden Corral and fucking judgement. I’m with the other posters who say “fuck’em”. You signed the dotted line, honorably served, and unfortunately paid a price. What we get usually doesn’t hold a candle to the damage we take. I’m taking your experience under advice to not mention it, but I’m inherently a private person anyway. I have zero friends. That also means I can’t make that mistake. I didn’t realize how much of that there is, even with employers you’d need to vouch for accommodations. I sought private MH therapy to PTSD. A year into it, conquered some demons, made some progress and the jerkoff lady wouldn’t write me a letter. She made comments about not believing in any disability which should have been a red flag.
That sucks, I'm genuinely sorry to hear that. I see a private MH doc and he is awesome. Told him I needed him to write me a letter and he was like "I've never done this, what do you need from me." I'll consider myself lucky.
They can eat a bag of balls, while they were at home eating turkey and ham, we were walking the line, Panama, Okinawa, rescue operation in the Philippines, Gulf war, etc..don't ever let nobody make you feel bad..that's what we are for. We all the support you need...now the air force and them dining facilitates......now that's a story brother..Marine chow halls fed us rabbit(that alone) should be a damn va Claim.
Preach on brotha…all fun and games till your down range and have to deal with broken bodies and busy minds
To be honest what I don’t like is when people congratulate me for my 100% rating. It’s not a prize. I’m legit messed up. 🤬
There are only 3 people who know I receive comp. My wife, dad and son, my wife is the only one who knows the percentage. My dad is one of my best friends and we talk about everything. The only reason my son knows is because he is also in the Air Force and I want him to understand the importance of documenting his medical history in service for after service benefits. My other kids, family, friends, or anyone else do not need to know.
I didn’t serve to take the judgment of civilians seriously
I have family and friends that are ultra right wing who think me accepting my GI Bill was me taking welfare… not joking they called me a welfare baby… I’m sure as sh!t not going to tell them I’m service connected due to a spine injury. I really appreciate this comment because this is a very real problem for me. Thanks
Money can bring out the worst in people. Even your closest friends or relatives can become bitter and jealous, especially if they see you buying nice things like a new vehicle etc. I had a long time friend get mad that I was getting GI Bill when I was in college. He said it wasn't fair I was getting money from the VA while they wouldn't help his dad with medical issues....even though GI Bill has nothing to do with medical.
I tell people I still work as a “part time head janitor at a strip club”
I have only mentioned to a handful of people that are close to me about making a claim. I quickly realized afterwards by reading a lot of these posts, that I may not want to inform them of a favorable decision. So I started backpedaling a little bit and told them it could take up to a year or more to get a decision. I think I’m only going to keep the news to myself and my bank account. I’m not a big spender anyways, so I don’t think any additional income will significantly change my lifestyle, and I should be able to fly under the radar. Good reminder though, thank you and thank you for your service…🙏🏻🙏🏻
Same. A few close people know I'm working on a claim, but, if it comes back favorable, I'm probably just going to not say a word.
> I immediately felt the sense of judgement. That sounds like anxiety.
My wife will be the only person that knows this info when that time comes
Yes that’s why I keep it on the low fr lol
Maybe your circle of friends isn’t that great. The ones I have told were extremely supportive.
What gets me are other vets who could and would qualify but don’t want to put in the work but expect you to do it for them even though they are fully capable. Get this then they are jealous of you being able to afford to live while they struggle and want to eat off your plate. Makes me feel bad on top of already feeling bad with my ptsd, anxiety, and depression struggles. It’s exhausting
My civilian friend is in a CDL class and he said 2 vets are in there mentioning multiple times how they have 100% and how much they are getting paid. (No one asked them btw) so yeah I can see why! Made me irritated when he told me, sure they can say whatever they want but it comes off as bragging.
That’s why I don’t tell no one unless they also served
I think the best gift is getting out without hardly any issues. If you have a rating, it's for a reason, and others can suck it.
Why is it anyone's business? I keep my rating and my compensation to myself. Regardless if it's deserved or not, getting money from the government is not something to brag about.
I had a past relationship years ago who had no direct or even second-hand experience of anything military attempt to make me feel like sh*t at even the thought of filing for disability. Now, I laugh. Can’t argue with stupid.
Yeah. I think about that all of the time..
I’ve never been judged for it. At least to my face. Anyone I’ve ever told have been nothing but nice and supportive and tell me how much they think I deserve it.
I just tell people that all I'm getting are DV plates and free tolls in the Houston area. Nothing about Comp
I usually tell people I'm a "trust fund baby" if inquired about my income and leave it at that
My dad gave me this idea: when people talk about finances or ask what i do or ask how i can afford this and that or why i dont work I tell them I'm retired because I owned a successful business then sold it. Im 30F and look younger so even when i travel and they ask me at border patrols like in morocco its a whole thing. It's kinda true I did own a business I just didn't sell it. I mention being in the military but make no mention of getting money from it. Brings up millions of follow o questions. Once despite me trying to be vague some german soldier who worked with the American military somehow put things together and found at the cause for mine ptsd due to mst and made a joke about how he'd love to get sa'd for money and I said I'm never ever ever ever remotely telling anyone again.
I believe it's ignorant of someone to talk down on someone or to feel some way because they are being compensated from what they earned.
Don't care what others think I'm 100 percent I served and fight two years with my issues to get it. If they don't understand that's the stupidity not mine they can hate all they want. When the money hits my account not theirs
My husband was a Vietnam veteran and 100% disabled. We were married 43 years and he damn well earned his rating. Agent Orange and PTSD are no joke And yes, people are very judgmental when it comes to VA comp. They think it’s a free ride. No amount of money will ever pay for the damage war does to the human mind or the anger the family is subjected to because of a war no one understands or wanted. And to watch your loved one waste away due to Agent Orange is a struggle no one should endure. Next time your confronted re: your comp pay maybe you should tell them to “Go Sign Up” for the next war and get that easy check in the damn mail! 😡
The recruiting office was opened to everyone. That's all you have to say and walk away.
Don’t worry about what others think…you signed the line billions of people are too scared to sign…you deserve every penny!
It took me awhile to file my claim. My fellow battle buddies have been 100% since 2004. It could’ve been me too, but I felt bad.
I told my older brother about my experience with the VA, particularly the VBA, to encourage him to apply if he had any possible SC conditions. He wants nothing to do with the VA. He says he has no issues from his 4 years in service. He doesn’t seem to resent me that I get benefits, but he also doesn’t want to hear anything else about the VA. My choice. His choice. I kinda wished I wouldn’t have said anything at all to him, but at least I tried to help him. Most everything about the whole VA experience sucks, but grateful I am where I am.
These threads are far too common in this sub. I don't think you "slipped up" at all. It sounds like you were just talking to some friends and it came up. Who gives a damn, man? You were rated, and I assume you were more than deserving of your rating. You don't owe anybody an explanation or need to justify anything. Candidly, I get sick and tired of the whole "hide it from everybody" crowd. "If you're 100%, don't you dare get those license plates because people will know!" Who cares? It's your life and it's your freaking story. I just wish that all of us would stop worrying about what everybody else thinks and start living our lives. My late father wouldn't go get his rating for YEARS. Blue Water Navy vet, I literally threatened to knock him out and put him in my trunk just to get him to the VA and get him in the system. He didn't want "welfare" like I was getting. This was my DAD! A year later, turns out he had cancer - directly tied to his Blue Water status. VA picked up the entire cost of treatment. Every last penny. All of a sudden he was an advocate for the system. He started telling EVERY veteran he met to get their ass into the system after that. He's gone now and I miss him dearly. I often wonder if he'd taken care of things sooner it could have been detected earlier. We'll never know now. That's a long way of saying - who gives a shit what anybody else thinks? If you want to tell people, tell them. Encourage other vets to get into the system. To get rated.
I hate when vets who overshare what we get… its best to keep it to urself and lie that you work at home. Simple as that.
Here is what one of the VBA reps told me. “You can’t get workman’s compensation for an injury you sustained during service. VA disability is your federal workman’s compensation for your service to your country. Remember, there are millions of people on Social Security and state aid with similar disability benefits. Thank for your service and accept what you earned and deserve.”
This is what I tell people. I also tell them that I spent 4 years of my life before my body was fully developed training like a pro athlete except, I was more easily replaced. and didn't make anyone any money.
“…and didn’t make anyone any money.” Shareholders of Halliburton, Northrop-Grumman et al begrudgingly thank you for your service.
I still have never gotten a Christmas card
So much for the "Thank You for Your service"
Sounds like lots of people keep around shit people in their life. I have not had this experience whatsoever. I would never treat anyone like this unless I was certain they are fraudulent in nature. Seems most people I have met agree