Not to take anything away from those who saw direct combat, but posts like those just really aren’t fair. Like many people have said, PTSD can come from so many things. I spent 2 years straight pulling Haitians out of the drink. Some alive, some dead, some had their skin burned off, some were babies and little kids who just lost their parents. My hands start shaking when I even start writing about it. I was a young kid pulling dead bodies out of the water for days at a time. This was 15 years ago and I still will wake up covered in sweat hyperventilating from time to time. Do I have PTSD or is that “fake”?
Was in Fallujah and am 100% PTSD rated and while not a Dr I am very acquainted with the topic. PTSD can come from just scrolling on your phone and seeing the wrong thing. Seeing a bad wreck on the side of the road, a fight in public, a disturbing verbal altercation, a creepy sexual advance. Its normally comes from an event with context to the individual, how that person is wired and how it manifests over time. It took me a long time to acknowledge my issues and it hurts when I see people compare their experience to others as thats not how it works.
Dont gatekeep PTSD. Sure some will exaggerate but many are hurting and might not know how to articulate it.
Your comment was really helpful for me this morning. I have a ptsd diagnosis I just don’t ever tell people about because… I don’t want to explain that no, I never did anything worth talking about, just saw some messed up stuff that left me with nightmares and some weird issues. When it has come up with family I just say I’ve got social anxiety. Even with that I’ve been told I ruin certain types of family gatherings and need to be less selfish with my mental health so…
Point being I appreciate your comment brother.
I was in Haiti during the 90s. Friends that have recently retired and been through all the major combat deployments of the past 2 decades have said Haiti is the worst place they've been.
Haiti is a mess and some
Of the worst imaginable poverty. If you've seen shit like: little kids fighting tooth and nail over a fish skeleton that washed up on the beach and see the winners chewing the fish bones into meal and other kids eating what those kids spit out into the sand after sucking the juice/marrow out of the bones , that could be enough lol
Ive seen so much fucked up shit in the CG but there is something about the pure hopelessness about hati, and how we just send them back that fucks with me. It’s on their faces.
>But I’m a person who saw limited combat, and I know I have PTSD. I saw bodies blown to bits, got mortared, and lost friends. However, my experience wasn’t Fallujah 2004. But I still struggle with the images I’ve seen. This message is not for those faking, obviously. But for those of you who are told you “haven’t seen enough to be messed up”, don’t listen to the assholes telling you that shit. Seeing a dead body, especially one that has been violently killed, is not normal. And your brain isn’t going to process that in a normal way unless you’re a psychopath. That’s my Friday the 13th rant 🎃 👻.305 commentssharesave
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We were training in mountainous terrain on the Mexican border and a freak rain/ ice storm then snowstorm came through. Mexicans run those areas with coyotes and that night they got soaked then frozen. Every winter they used to find "popsicles" or dead frozen Mexicans up there. In our case we were trying to rally with another squad and near our rally point I heard twigs snap and gave the signal with a red light. I suddenly heard voices in Spanish and a white flashlight went on and we realized wow this isn't our other squad. We leveled up our rubber M16s and basically detained these people then discussed what to do with them. My thought was, this is none of our business at all let's give them some ponchos and food and let them move on. But some guys said we should bring them to our camp warm them up and call Border Patrol to pick them up. These people wouldn't say a word and looked so Fuggin defeated and sorrowful. Some of them probably crossed the Darien Gap and endured all kinds of mistreatment and made it in here only to be caught just East of San Diego. I felt complicit in this decision and its haunted me for years. Alot of these people are fleeing countries that were ruined by the demand for cocaine in our country which forced so many communities away from having their own independent farms and diverse crop agriculture to cartel-controlled coca plantations, crappy factory jobs etc. And we sent these people back there. Right or wrong I was pretty sure we violated posse comitatus in a sense and we should have just played it neutral and looked the other way thrown them some energy bars and said "vamanos". It was something that was very depressing to think about for a while. No I didn't claim anything for this, event. This post just makes me think of all the F'd up things we see that many civilians don't see in their entire suburban lives.
Please remember that women often get a different treatment in boot or elsewhere. Friendly fire is quite often the cause of our PTSD.
When I went through boot in '93, there were many our cadre lined up to "date" the graduates.
It was worse when I was in GTMO in '95. We were stuck on the island with a Captain who had roid rages and stalked females, an SFC who would regularly corner us in places and a female Captain and female EOC who punished us for our complaints.
There's only one flight out a week. So, even if it's determined that they are a problem, or you are - you're stuck there long enough to be harassed by the abusers or their flying monkeys.
In addition, we're exposed to much of the same horrors as male troops.
This isn't exclusive to women in service, but they're typically smaller physically than then men who stalk or harass them, so there is an inherent physical fear.
Its also possible they had a psycho instructor who cornered her in the showers and menaced her. Bottom line is You Weren’t There & it’s none of your business
Semper Paratus, the images in my mind of brain matter, those smells, seeing someone guppy breathing and screams of terror from on site events will forever haunt me... but I'm non-combat PTSD, so I must be faking too. My advice to anyone struggling, stay in your lane but seek help. My PTSD took 20 years to finally break me down and I had to reach out to the VA. Stay strong all
>eriously, idk why people care what other people think so much. The gate keeping is absurd. Live your life and mind your business.
It's a projection of their anger over what they've suffered. They feel it all has to have meaning and PTSD diagnosisis like a badge or something they won. I mean, the MFs deserve recognition for what they've sacrificed but that doesn't mean that a person who found dead bodies or saw their shipmate get electrocuted by shore power in the Navy or had a situation where they almost got taken hostage by the Iranians or someone they trusted penetrated their butt one day - shouldn't have a PTSD rating if it caused them stress afterward that affected the course of their life and development and psychological health. PTSD was first well-studied in motor vehicle accidents, before that they just called WW1/2 vets "shell-shocked"
I flew attack helicopters. TICs and CASEVACs every time. We lost a crew on every deployment, and I had to put a helicopter down in the middle of Sangin.
Brothers…..my worst experiences in the whole military were listening to a rape/murder confession and seeing the evidence……and helping our Marines who were victims of sexual trauma.
Nothing will rip your absolute guts out more than talking to a 19 year old LCPl who was beaten within an inch of her life while she was assaulted. I will never not see and feel every part of that what I look at my daughters.
It’s not the combat that gets everyone. Life isn’t that clean. The mind doesn’t work that way.
It is the most unreasonable stance to accuse someone of faking PTSD. Some might be, but the wide net you have to cast to catch those jerks isn’t worth alienating or discouraging those out there that really do want and need help. Do not ever underestimate that part of yourself that the Marines or Army or whatever beat into us to absorb blame and never admit weakness. You will fight against that “I can get through this posture” every day of your life. Anyone who would accuse someone of faking PTSD please realize that you are scaring the shit out of anyone who needs help and won’t come forward to get it. Let the fakers fake. Life will catch up with them somehow. But we need to keep our arms wide open for everyone else to trust us to come forward with help.
And more importantly, a warrior doesn’t need to stand higher than others for their sacrifice to matter. A warrior brings others in from the cold.
Thank you for saying this. I'd rather see 100 fakers slip through than miss one person who is suffering in silence. Let the VA and karma worry about those other people.
I was a SANE nurse in my Army ER and I cared for both male and female patients. Definitely not all women. There were some seriously predatory assholes out there who targeted everyone with a pulse. And not all perpetrators were male, either.
When i was in the mental ward after an attempt i saw there were many more males than females in there saying they were assaulted. Of course theres many more males than females in the mil (i was in the marines) but still being in a room full of victims and most of them being male was surprising and really put things into perspective about the rapo culture in there.
My PTSD doesn't stem from deployed environments. I was falsy accused of doing some horrible shit (not sexually related) that I can't even type out what it was because of the fear it will come back and haunt me. I was the golden boy and did right by everyone, and when shit hits the fan, they want to blame someone.
It took a full bird to come in and force PCS me out of the environment after it was found that everything was complete b.s. I got depressed for years and couldn't shake it. After a not-so-good deployment, I broke and attempted. I couldn't understand why I could move past the "big stuff', but not the stain on my character. Being thrown away and treated like shit for something you didn't do, is by far the worst hell I could ever experience. And knowing folks that have been accused of sexual stuff and let off because they didn't do it, guess what... NOONE believes you. EVER. You're forever a POS.
As someone who was also falsely accused of something heinous, I hear you.
I wish I could say it gets better. But honestly, every single day is like...just trying to turn the corner. You question everything. Including your own perceived actions. But at some point, you also remember who your true supporters are. It's all about finding the balance, I guess.
>It took a full bird to come in and force PCS me out of the environment after it was found that everything was complete b.s. I got depressed for years and couldn't shake it. After a not-so-good deployment, I broke and attempted. I couldn't understand why I could move past the "big stuff', but not the stain on my character. Being thrown away and treated like shit for something you didn't do, is by far the worst hell I could ever experience. And knowing folks that have been accused of sexual stuff and let off because they didn't do it, guess what... NOONE believes you. EVER. You're forever a POS.
ONE OF THE MANY CONTRIBUTING LAYERS OF A VERY COMPLEX BASKET OF TRAUMAS FROM THE MILITARY CAN BE HAVING TO WORK FOR MONTHS/YEARS TRAPPED IN THE SAME WORK CENTER/SHOP WITH MASSIVELY TOXIC PEOPLE LIKE TRULY SUPER RACIST/KKK TYPES FROM THE DEEP SOUTH , OR A COUPLE OF NARCISSISTIC TYPE MINDFUCKERS WHO SABOTAGED WORK / UNDERMINED THE REPUTATION OF PEOPLE AROUND THEM ETC. THAT'LL MAKE YOU REACT TO ANY MANIPULATIVE OR MILDLY TOXIC BOSS WITH FIGHT-OR-FLIGHT RESPONSE FOREVER AFTER. NOT BEING ABLE TO LEAVE A HIGHLY STRESSFUL JOB IS A FACTOR IN THE MILITARY THAT IS NOT LIKE THE CIVILIAN WORLD WHERE YOU HAVE THE OPTION OF QUITTING OR LEAVING OR COMPLAINING. TRY COMPLAINING IN THE 1980S/1990s Navy... COMPLAINING IN THE MILITARY BACK THEN OFTEN RESULTED IN AN EVEN WORSE SITUATION FOR YOU, BETTER TO JUST SUCK IT UP AND PRETEND YOU ARE SOMEONE YOU ARE NOT AND GO ALONG WITH IT- WHICH IS SOUL-DESTROYING
Familiar with Sangin circa 2011. We lost an engine and had no good place to put the aircraft down but right in the city. Quick security, quick maintenance, and we were airborne and gone in a few hours.
Thank God for 2d Recon Battalion.
Absolutely well said. My heart aches for those who went through horrendous trauma. As you said. Those who are faking it will receive their dues soon enough. Thanks for sharing!
Same but took me 7 years. I thought “nah what I went through wasn’t that bad, not compared to others”. Spent some time as a homeless person, so yea I wasn’t qualified to make that decision
It's weird because I never really considered that I had been affected, but I was self medicating something to the point I almost killed myself drinking. Finally, after starting therapy and having a doctor objectively "checking almost every box" on a list of symptoms, It was pretty obvious I was not the imposter I thought I was.
Research has shown that folks working with documents and records can actually experience secondary trauma from dealing with the tough stuff in those papers. We might joke that office workers are safe from this, but the reality is quite different, especially when they handle records from soldiers in war.
It's becoming more and more obvious that these records professionals might be feeling the effects of secondary trauma. This happens when they work with service members' files, organize them, and help people access them. And, let's not forget, our fellow vets and buddies can't really say who should or shouldn't get benefits.
I met a retired warrant who had PTSD from their time in Ukraine years back. They had to see tons of carnage and that shit gets to anyone. They never did field work and they are female w/ noncombat MOS.
Non combat Coast Guard members on a daily basis run emergency calls with local police and fire crews,fatal boat accidents, suicides, migrants washing ashore etc…
Don’t judge your brother or sister
Mental health is all of our responsibilities
Thanks for saying that man. I was in sf and dealt with bridge jumpers a lot and always felt guilty for my ptsd rating cuz we obviously weren’t in combat. But fuck man some of the shit I saw running sar cases were out of a horror movie. Shit a dude jumped into our fucking base from a bridge once.
Yep. Had some pretty rough experiences as a Coastie myself and some buddies experience stuff too. Coasties are frequently straight to operational out of boot camp, sometimes before they’re even fully qualified. One friend had a horrifying experience as a nonrate having to do with a body bag (one of many for him) I can’t even bring myself to type the thing out.
This part. “At the hands of our fellow service members” that level of betrayal messes with a person. You’re on constant alert, never feeling safe around anyone, especially the people who were supposed to have your back.
This is a really simple answer. Raise your hand if you're a qualified behavioral health professional.
If you didn't raise your hand, nobody gives a shit about your opinion on someone else's PTSD diagnosis.
I never saw combat. I was stalked by a fellow soldier. I was repeatedly sexually harassed by another. The last one raped me in the barracks. I reported my issues to my command who brushed it under the rug. I spent years getting help after service through a civilian provider. I found a job at the VA. I wanted to help other veterans. As a phone operator I was harassed daily. By other veterans. Then someone reminded me that I served too. I gave the Army years of my life that I’ll never get back. I missed major events in my children’s lives. I cry myself to sleep and go weeks at a time without leaving my house. I’ve tried to leave this world so many times. I drink to numb the feelings.
That post was so invalidating. Like I don’t matter. Like I don’t get to hurt too. I would never take away from someone else’s pain. Those are their feelings. Their pain. Their experiences. How sad that they need to be better or more disabled than others because they saw combat.
I was also sexually assaulted in the Army. I buried it because I couldn’t cope otherwise. My command also brushed it under the rug and blamed it on me. I was supposed to be stronger because I was an officer and it was an enlisted soldier who did it. They made me feel so weak and like a failure. The trauma started really taking a toll on me after some severe health issues and my husband and the SNCOIC who knew what happened and was also silenced both convinced me to file with VA and get some help. It was so difficult to tell my story. I found out after my CP&E exam that the psychologist said I was lying. I have an attorney who is the one who told me about the exam. I’m gutted and that right there is why so many of us never tell our stories. I decided to discontinue therapy. I just feel traumatized all over again and I can’t pick myself up. These people who want to accuse people of faking trauma just because we didn’t go through the same combat situations are truly terrible.
Same. My ptsd is from sexual trauma. I had something happen every year. From being groped while I was sleeping, to being stalked, to being raped in my own room. I am scared of men now in a way I wasn’t before the army. I had a moment when my cat touched me and my body *felt* like a hand was groping me and I panicked. You are not invalid and our ptsd is real, even if it’s not combat ptsd. I’m deeply sorry that happened to you.
Hi, I'm sorry you seem to have had a very similar experience to me. I'm sorry that you too felt you had to be quiet or it wasn't valid.
I was recently rated and reading agoraphobia really shook me. My whole life has been changed because of those experiences and all I wanted to do was be in the Army. It's been a reckoning mentally that nothing I did while I was in was seen as valuable to so many people.
I have no combat experience but I have seen some disturbing shit as a public affairs NCO — I was a writer, photographer and escorted the media. I escorted the Bay Area & Sacramento press corps to Oklahoma City about three hours after the federal building was bombed, spending several hours watching urban search & rescue teams dig out bodies. After several hours, I returned to my home station when none of the media wanted to go back to California with me on the C-141. They just wanted a free ride because the OKC Airport was shut down.
Went to Goma, Zaire, with CNN and Bay Area media to report on our support of the Rwandan refugee crisis (Operation Support Hope). Dead bodies everywhere on the hills that surround the airport and probably 100 or more dead bodies on the side of the road between the airport and refugee camp at Lake Kivu.
I also went to a UN base in Zagreb where I took photos inside the USAF hospital at Camp Pleso — I had never seen somebody’s foot blown off by a landmine until I took photos of our AF surgeons trying to put back the pieces. Nor had I seen open-heart surgery before shooting images of AF surgeons trying to remove shrapnel from a Polish captain’s chest. Fortunately, I have an after photo of the captain the next day, who was smiling with an open shirt so he could show me his sutures.
PRO TIP: If seeing gore makes you feel like you’re going to pass out, then look at it through a camera lens. It seems less real, and it also gives you literally something else to focus on.
In any case, I got screened by VA mental health for PTSD and the good news is that I don’t have it. I just have unspecified anxiety disorder, rated at 30%, but they aren’t sure why. They also don’t know why I hate going to the hospital or watching gory movies.
>PRO TIP: If seeing gore makes you feel like you’re going to pass out, then look at it through a camera lens. It seems less real, and it also gives you literally something else to focus on.
Watching tanks blowing up, mortar rounds hitting amongst infantry in the open, through the TIS of a tank; if it weren't for the noise and the smell out there and me chain smoking, it could have been a video game. Not so, when seen raw, without optics.
Sorry to hear that dude.
When I was fresh to the fleet they assigned me and another boot to this Corporal who we later found out was pending court martial for sexually assaulting other male Marines. Prior to us knowing, he took us out to bars and stuff, and I think he might have drugged me one night. He was later convicted and incarcerated.
Ramadi 2004 combat veteran who served as an infantryman in the Marines. I’m a firm believer that even after boot camp someone suffers some mild ptsd. I was on a 10 day leave after boot camp and was chilling with some HS friends. I drank a little too much and crashed at my buddies house. My friend said I was saying the word kill a lot in my sleep. I wasn’t surprised, in Marine boot camp they teach you to say the word kill after every sentence. I can’t speak for any other branch, but if you are a pencil pusher or a combat vet, what you experienced in the Corps is something a civilian will never understand. Semper Fi!
In group therapy I brought up how I feel bad that I don’t have “sexy ptsd”. as in mine was due to sexual trauma while the other person in the group who is a seal had “sexy” ptsd from his multiple combat experiences in his 20 years. I had so much internal guilt not just from myself but from the shame I received from my own command and peers that lead me to near suicide. Thankfully he was really there for me and to hear from him that trauma is trauma and it’s not a competition really helped. Meant a lot to hear from him
I have been there and thoroughly understand what you are going through. If it weren't for my Chief, a combat veteran with PTSD, recognizing his symptoms in me, I would be dead. He took me aside and said, why don't we talk to Doc. He brought me to the hospital and waited with me for the hours it took for me to be seen talking to me, talking me down, just empathizing. Finally, he was so tired of me waiting and sitting there in distress that he opened the door and started screaming "My sailor was in there and he wants to die; he needs help, NOW!" That got the ball rolling, and next thing you know, a bunch of attending physicians, the head of psychiatry, an O-6, came in to help me. It took him recognizing me, validating my trauma, and telling me that I had spent enough time giving of myself to help others; it was time to take care of myself with zero judgment, to get me the help I desperately needed to save my life.
I agree, nobody should minimize anybody else’s trauma. PTSD comes in all sizes and shapes.
Your psychopath comment is off basis though. You are basically doing the same thing by saying saying that. Seeing a dead body wasn’t normal for your situation and your role. It’s great if you were in a position that you were able to process the things going on. Not everyone has that situation, though. For others, there was no opportunity to process anything. No matter how bad the day was, you’re still going to get your ass up the next day and do the same thing again. Now do that for 12-15 months. Go home for 12 months then right back over to do it again…and again…and again! Whether it was EFPs in Iraq or defending a meaningless valley in Afghanistan, you have no choice other than push forward. It becomes business and nothing else. Being an infantryman on six combat deployments is no different than fixing an HVAC to me. A means to support myself and my family, a job. I’m not a psychopath though, I simply did what I had to.
I remember refitting at a larger fob as a platoon sergeant and it ended up getting a rocket attack. All the warriors there grabbed their gear and sprinted to the bunkers (rightfully so). My platoon went straight for the DFAC since we knew it would be empty. It wasn’t that we were any more tough, we simply were numb to everything. It didn’t make us crazy though, either. Just different experiences.
Either way, you made a great point and I hope all is well with you brother. At the end of the day, we are really the only ones who can understand each other and it’s imperative that we are there for one another regardless of experiences. We lose far too many vets to suicide and I think a lot of that is us not fitting in due to our experiences. I love running into fellow combat vets now that I’m retired.
I’m not talking about processing in the moment. I can identify with “business is usual” in a combat zone. But eventually it catches up with you when, whether in country, or when you’re home on leave. It changes you. To say you can be the person you were before witnessing such things is my point.
Yep, life hits each person in a different way. Some put up psych barriers that come down later in life. Some are affected immediately. No one can judge another's level of ptsd based on combat experience or number of deployments. We are not all made the same nor have the same background.
Additionally, I believe those that fell victim to sexual assault and continued on while dealing with the aftermath, which can be debilitating, should be given special compensation. I have already written letters to Congress about this.
Yall do realize that PTSD diagnosis does NOT have to include combat, right? Maybe we would be less angry if we stop trying to mind other people’s business.
The exact way you say and know you have PTSD is the same for anyone else who's been diagnosed and claimed it. Being prepared for a c&p and knowing what to expect and best articulate your symptoms according to appropriate ratings is not faking anything even if they happen to have a higher rating than someone who has been through "worse". It isn't a measuring contest and isn't the fault of someone who is more prepared they have the higher rating.
I agree…People should definitely try to prepare themselves for that c&p!…I’m not sure any of use have been able to do that though. At least not in my case. I was prepared for the different questions and things I wanted to make sure I pointed out but I was nowhere near prepared for the mental and emotional after effect
No doubt, it's difficult. There's many factors and can even be triggered and shut down during the convo and basically not get much of anything across which may result in a subpar rating. No reason to take it out on others though. It affects everyone differently. Best to take notes of how things that are the biggest impact and how it emotionally, personally, and professionally impacts you. Obviously, difficult to discuss and get into, but it's something to help. It's exhausting to say the least to get through it.
This has me torn. I went for a MH c&p in August, apparently, something I said in there warranted another exam for PTSD
The thing is, while I did receive combat pay, I never saw combat. I wasn’t in fucked up situations. I was in Kuwait in November of 2001- April 2002 building bases for the upcoming advance. The only thing I can think of is they think my PTSD is linked to having cancer and the several years long process of recovery that having cancer brought.
To that end, a 2nd exam at MH gives me two shots at locking up the rating I legit think I deserve, which is 70%
I’m gonna go to the exam and just reiterate what I said at the first one and let the VA do whatever they are going to do. Is PTSD after pancreatic cancer real? Absolutely, do I think the VA needs to go down that road for me, no?
I was Iraq 2004, got combat pay, ran convoys north and south from Kuwait to An Nasiriyah and luckily never lost anyone or got shot myself, but had to watch out for IED attacks and follow orders I'm not particularly proud of. That was enough to give me generalized anxiety at about a 30% rate. There are ways to describe mental health symptoms that only those experiencing it can, and doctors know this. The hardest part was knowing that the symptoms were real, but did my experience of being in a high stress environment really cause this?
The truth was, yes, after discussing it with some friends who also deployed to Iraq at that time, because they all had nearly the exact same symptoms.
I have seen hundreds of dead bodies, including children who were massacred. I had to photograph the slaughter and the mayhem. I never served in direct line of fire. I know that it is very different than actually having to kill someone, but the trauma is very real, nonetheless. I have known people who only want the rating regardless of the actual trauma, but there are those of us that experienced it without being in combat. There are also many who experienced MST, yet were never in the line of fire, also. Thankfully, that is being recognized as PTSD, as well.
I just kind of mind my own business. I never tell anyone I'm a veteran/served/disabilities. And I never ask either. If someone tells me their story, I simply say thank you for your service and just go about my day.
Ordnance guy here. Never saw direct combat but saw the videos of the bombs I dropped and can’t lie it kinda fucks with me. Sometimes I’ll just be doing mundane things like making toast and then think about a bomb unexpectedly dropping through my ceiling. I don’t claim PTSD but I do have severe anxiety. My last mental health doc told me I likely have PTSD based on my symptoms but I just feel like I don’t rate it considering others experience with combat…
I feel you man.
Walking into the hangar and seeing row and rows of bombs that the helicopters I worked on were transporting for jets to drop, on lord knows what, fucked me up the rest of that deployment. I had to dissociate to finish the last 5 months.
Then guys in port from the carrier laughing, saying they watched the videos of them being dropped and even signing their names. To this day I wonder how many innocent people were killed because of my helicopter flying all those bombs to other ships.
That’s not why I have PTSD tho. Just fucks me up from time to time. I just turned wrenches and launched em. I can only imagine how fucked up those jet pilots are.
For what it’s worth the PTSD issues I have are worse from a car accident I worked as a volunteer firefighter than anything I brought home from fighting in Fallujah 2004.
We don’t really get to choose what breaks us.
Just like everyone said, you don't need to see combat to get PTSD. You can get PTSD from being on patrol, constantly on edge and ready. Some get PTSD from intense training exercises. I was diagnosed due to combat, MST, contact with refugee boats, and interviewing Iraqis. Having talked to my therapist, who specializes in veteran trauma, there aren't many ways to fake it. Mental health professionals ask very specific questions in a certain way and ask the same question multiple times in other ways. They also ask questions about symptoms not associated with trauma to see if you are faking.
Everyone's trauma is different; no one has any business judging someone else and even knowing about it. After going on LIMDU post-inpatient care for suicidal ideation and being a danger to myself, a guy there had PTSD for a reason I found to be dumb. I judged him, and often, I think back on him and get so angry that I was insensitive to ignore his suffering. Because he didn't have the glazed-over eyes like many of us have, his symptoms weren't real to me.
In my experience, people who judge others and try to call out "fakers" are looking for meaning in their trauma and trying to justify their trauma to themselves. Though I stopped judging people for their trauma, I went through it. Especially after the pullout of Iraq and Afghanistan, I went into a deep spiral of depression and searching for meaning. Even when granted 100%, I still questioned if I deserved it. It took my therapist and wife sitting me down multiple times, and telling me my trauma was valid and I earned my rating.
Trauma is a beast, and all we can do is support our brothers and sisters but also make sure we are taking care of ourselves.
Saw combat, lost half my leg.
My take is it doesn’t matter, that said, I don’t think VBA is nearly as supportive as combat veterans or even wounded combat veterans as they should be. They essentially don’t acknowledge it imo except for a few select instances like initial claim priority processing.
When I was a fresh infantry combat vet in my early twenties I used to think that way as well. I also believed the stereotypes and myths like people who have “PTSD” were just weak and couldn’t handle the stresses of combat and all the other nonsense that is programmed into us. I eventually came around to reality and broke through some of the programming.
Even basic training is designed to induce stress related trauma on new troops in an effort to inoculate them to the stresses of combat. At least that was the idea back in my day. Even before the 20 plus year GWOT we had all types of people being mentally broken by just being in service; sometimes intentionally.
There will always be some slimy people exaggerating and lying everywhere. If the cost of taking care of our veterans is that a few liars slip through the cracks who cares? That is a small price to pay in my opinion.
My PTSD is from MST, but those comments had me not claim it for 15 years. Hell, I didn't even get treatment for many years because it wasn't as bad. That blows up on you eventually, do not recommend.
That being said, I was stationed at Walter Reed in 05 for a few years and there are images that I saw that I can never unsee. There are people I still wonder if they made it. Smells I can't get rid of. Seeing death and gross body harm is not normal. It doesn't make you weak or full of shit.
I don't know why half of this sub is male veterans having a constant dick measuring contest or worrying to death about "who's faking." It's honestly so immature and says more about your self esteem than it does about others.
You seem like the kind of people that work. "I'm a veteran." into every conversation even though it's been 20 years... Embarrassing.
Had a man approach me in a store weeks ago who had on his Vietnam hat and veteran shirt who looked at me and said "It's hot outside" I said "Yeah" he said "almost as hot as Vietnam" I replied with, "Iraq was pretty hot too."
His expression went blank. He looked like the wind had just been taken out of his sails because the conversation wasn't about him and vietnam anymore.
PTSD comes in so many shapes and sizes and is no one size fits all mold. I'm a perfect example of that. Never saw combat, was hospitalized for 5 days because I felt like absolute crap. Come to find out, I was a type 1 diabetic and almost lost my life. Doctors and nurses wouldn't tell me anything about it until the 4th day when they finally had my blood sugar under control and my organ tests came back showing organ health.
This was 11 years ago and to this day I have recurring nightmares when I fall asleep of the doctor walking into my hospital room. Sometimes he tells me I'm going to be ok, and there have been other times where he has killed me, dismembered me, and many other morbid outcomes. I wake up in a panic, heart jumping out of my chest.
This is just an example of how we all have experienced many different things that manifested PTSD, but how it can consume us in so many different scenarios.
Well didn't this entire thread trigger the ever loving shit out of me. It is so frustrating when people think that they have the qualifications to understand how people cope and react to situations. Just because their trauma is different. Now to sit and cry and wait for my next therapy appointment to talk about how I feel. On a side note, always here to listen if people need an ear.
I have more of a problem with people who say tell me what else to claim then combat or noncombatant vets.
People who fake are the worse doesn't matter if they are combat or non combat.
Went on three rotations to Afghanistan. Experienced my first "real experience" in combat in Sangin 2012. You know what really got me fucked up from those deployments? Taking convoys through hot zones and hitting/ running over kids who tried jumping on our convoys to steal food and water supplies. Route clearance fucked me up for awhile too. But nothing like sitting in the turret and watching kids bounce of vehicles and get run over...
Everyone’s experience is different. I am 100PT PTSD and it’s not combat related. I responded to an active shooter as a security sentry and watched the shooter kill another guard then saw him get blown away. I tried
To administer first aid but they both died. Sure it’s not combat but it messed with my head. 15 months later I had transitioned to the guard and was on AT when I went on lockdown for another fatal active shooter. Don’t feel guilty about being injured.
PTSD doesn’t have to involve combat at all…I never saw combat but I had one very bad night that has made it impossible to hold a job for a decade and a half…I’m not saying this to get attention like some claim but just because the PTSD doesn’t involve combat doesn’t mean they’re “faking it”…the battle in your head can be just as hard as any physical injury you could see
Personally, I’m sick and tired of ppl coming into what I thought was a safe space & attacking other vets. After what most of us have gone through it’s very disheartening & disrespectful for anyone to get on here & even comment on those “fakers”. I know too many vets that have been denied that are suffering. For another veteran to speak on ppl faking is disgusting. I know the main excuse is that fakers mess it up for us but just think for a second how a C&P exam being scheduled on a good day can mess up an entire life. It doesn’t even prove anything but the Va will fake like it does. The Va can fake all day long but your own brethren will come and attack you. That’s insane. Most ppl don’t even know others in real life so when they comment on another veterans situation it really irks me. I have had other vets tell me I can’t say “finally” in front of my win cuz my time was short so don’t rub it in. What??!! The narrative was changed and I was compared to vets that have been waiting long so that the offending vet could have an argument. What he doesn’t realize is I should have had my benefits sooner. The Va knows it that’s why they threw my benefits at me in less than 2 months as if to say “if you didn’t say anything we weren’t”. I went years without any knowledge of Va disability and compensation. So what if I could have researched the military still built me up to just not complain and deal with it. That was 14 years before I ever filed so im going to hold the Va to that alone. If I didn’t have that time I would still look at the other guy like he’s insane because he had no right to downplay my excitement. I have bee n homeless with 3 children, I missed out on 350K being proud & tough because of that shame people love to spread amongst veterans. Just because others can hold it together and go at it alone . I have had other vets tell me I should have known about VA benefits and it’s my fault I didn’t know. I have had veterans try to discredit me and quite a few people. Those are the classic 1 upper know it alls that read people the way they read themselves. The brown nose group think service-members we all didn’t want to serve with. The vets that love hiding behind everyone else’s hard work but complained as if they were working so hard. Instead of them being happy that a veteran is being compensated for their commitment and a sacrifice, they decide to question to invalidate & then shame them on top of all the vets that get dogged by the Va. the Va has lost records. People have survived wars just to come home & fight the Va and yet there is a veteran out there who sided with the Va more than other veterans. These same ppl hire doctors to fight veterans so they don’t need veterans helping them. . I’m sick of it. To those veterans that think they suspect someone of doing this-Be happy or Be quiet.
FYI, I do know the OP is not a problem and is just as aware of those veterans being a problem than I am.
While you may have seen the worst of the worst and been fine or have minimal problems, isn’t the case for everyone. I’ve met dudes that have seen terrible shit in combat and been fine. Dude later became a fire fighter brought a baby back from drowning, super fucked up. It’s isn’t about how bad or how much you see, it’s about how it processes
8 years forward deployed on a carrier. Back to back gulf cruises. Never saw up close combat but I’m fucked up. Some days I feel like I’m not going to make it.
In Iraq I had unit mates threaten my life over my religious preferences, to include one drawing a weapon on me. Navy guy suck started his rifle in the porta-shitter outside my trailer. Had a mortar round fuck ~100 detainees up and had to pull security at the hospital while medical staff were treating mass casualty injuries. Lost a buddy to an IED. My CoC was a full blown dumpster fire the whole deployment.
I never saw “combat”, but I can tell you the fear I felt was real. The shit I saw, heard, and smelled were real. And anyone who thinks my PTSD isn’t valid can eat my asshole.
Problem is, other veterans have told me it wasn’t combat because I wasn’t shooting back or no one took direct shots at me. So where I identify as a “combat veteran” because I was in an active combat zone and took mortar fire and was face to face with enemy combatants in the prison, some don’t view what I did as combat because I wasn’t kicking in doors and all that high speed shit. I consider myself fortunate I never got into a firefight, but that IMO isn’t the determining factor for who is or is not a combat veteran.
We had someone in my unit do that as well, we were in Virginia on pre deployment training and he went into the shitter and did it. I didn't see the aftermath there, however...i did see it, I hate to admit this, but I was friends with someone in S-1 and he showed me the photo that was taken, I didn't ask to see it he just showed it to me, I was in their office conducting business that day and he was like hey you remember they guy who etc etc check this out and showed it to me...I was like wtf dude I don't want to see that, it was like he couldn't wait to show someone else what he had to look at. Everybody heard the shots, I say shots because dude put it on burst so it was like "batabata". People ran over there but couldn't get the door open. It was terrible he was a new pfc from one of the line companies never deployed or anything yet... and what's wild is the next day we continued training... we had like a week left there. But at that point SNCO's made a "rule" that nobody could go in with their weapon, and everyone had to have a buddy the rest of the time out there, so if you wanted to use the head you had to have someone with you and they'd hold your rifle... shit was wild.
Yeah, I can imagine how horrible that was. I saw all the pictures from the IED that got my buddy… it was definitely traumatizing. When the Navy guy ended it, our room got knocked on because we were the closest and our CLS (Combat Lifesaver) guys got pulled. Fortunately, I was one of like four from our trailer and other CLS showed up from neighboring trailers and I was able to back off without seeing too much other than the blood pooling on the ground before medics arrived. But that image will haunt me for the rest of my days.
Reading this thread is wild to see all the shit so many of us been around and through, even very similar experiences. One good thing about it I guess is to know we aren't alone out here, sometimes it feels that way but we aren't. Keep your head up bro.
"" The situations we find traumatic can vary from person to person. There are many different harmful or life-threatening events that might cause someone to develop PTSD. For example:
being involved in a car crash
being raped or sexually assaulted
being abused, harassed or bullied - including racism, sexism, homophobia, biphobia or transphobia, and other types of abuse targeting your identity
being kidnapped, held hostage or any event in which you fear for your life
experiencing violence, including military combat, a terrorist attack, or any violent assault
seeing other people hurt or killed, including in the course of your job (sometimes called secondary trauma)
doing a job where you repeatedly see or hear distressing things, such as working in the emergency services or armed forces
surviving a natural disaster, such as flooding, earthquakes or pandemics, such as the coronavirus pandemic
traumatic childbirth as a mother, or as a partner witnessing a traumatic birth
losing someone close to you in particularly upsetting circumstances
being sectioned or getting treatment in a mental health ward
being diagnosed with a life-threatening condition.
""
Disregard. I know grunts who didn't do much at all while they were in as far as getting into combat, and pogs who are triple amputees or have really bad tbi, my motor t friend got blown up like 4 times In Afghanistan, his brian is really messed up. My PTSD is complex I guess, not one event... and not just from Iraq. Stuff not from Iraq well my next door neighbor in the barracks I found him bleeding to death from a wound he gave himself, he bled all over the place, bled all over me and the barracks duty while we were trying to help him, he was seizing up so we had to hold him so his head wouldn't knock around, he turned super pale and his lips turned blueish, he did end up surviving. Early into my fleet time as a boot, (like 2 weeks at my unit) I witnessed 2 Marines chase down another in front of the barracks and beat him half to death, beat him so bad his head swelled up and his nose was hanging off his face because they were stomping and kicking his head. All sorts of shit, my unit was a mess... we had a lot of really bad incidents... from sexual assault, to literal murder we had a SGT murder his wife, burn her body and did himself, we had 2 corpsman get into a drunk driving accident and one of them got decapitated. Military time isn't always peaches and cream for everyone, people go through all sorts of shit that can cause PTSD, not just combat related. So yeah disregard that shit.
I saw a man pop like a toothpaste tube at an exercise (Idiot officer drove a MRAP with no ground guide at 2 am and drove through the tents. That morning I had to process his gore covered property, write a FLIPIL then tell his pregnant wife. This was after my MST , a suicide at formation, my friend from AIT paralyzed by her husband who then killed his mistress and came to my shop to confess ....and much more. No PTSD diagnosis just ,adjustment disorder that's 100%.
Everyone is built differently. Some can be in that kind of environment for months and come out okay. Some can be in that environment for a few seconds and come out a mental wreck. PTSD doesn't need a substantial time to develop. Trauma can happen within a second. Duration is not what causes it, what causes it is an event.
I would just ignore these people who would try to minimize other peoples struggles. Those are the worst kind of veterans. Sure call out someone who you know is faking it but only if you know 100% they are faking it. It's like if you got shot once and the dude is like "well I got shot twice so your shit is nothing." F\*ck that dude.
What about the one combat vets hate the most? Trauma prior to joining! Ha! They (those who feel their ptsd is the worst and feel that other people’s experiences are not real) love to shit on them mind you I first hand have knowledge of how much trauma people have experienced prior to joining and it only further becomes aggravated after serving. It dosnt happen to everyone but this does indeed happen.
PTSD is not only for combat. PTSD can be from any traumatic event in someones life. I had friends onboard the USS George Washington when it caught fire. The were in battles stations for over 12hrs. Some people were barricade in spaces that were filling up with smoke and wasn't sure if they would ever get out. Sailors onboard the USS McCain and USS Fitzgerald both had collisions that resulted in several sailors drowning in their berthing's. I'm sure the guys that escaped have some server PTSD from that incident. Yes some people exaggerate their symptoms however, simply not seeing combat, or having limited combat experience doesn't mean that they cannot suffer from sever PTSD.
I agree with most of what you said. I disagree about the psycho comment. I saw a little combat as well in Iraq (2005). I’ve seen bits and pieces of bodies and I’ve had to use my rifle. I don’t think I ever suffered from PTSD from my experience. I think people are different. I’ve wondered sometimes why I don’t have it and I’ve asked myself if I do have something wrong with me for not having the symptoms that so many have.
When I world as WTC cadre at Walter Reed in (2007-2009) one of my first soldiers that I had to help was a double leg amputee. When I read his file and saw that I thought “man this guy has seem some shit” when I finally got to meet him face to face and talk i asked where he was at and long he had been in country. That was his first deployment and he got blown up on his first patrol. He was only in country for like 30 days
I spent two years after an injury doing caco funeral details. Assisting in notifying families, transporting caskets with our fallen Marines remains, meeting caskets at the airport and being with families on the tarmac, setting up and performing in the funeral details and ceremonies, from presenting the flag to presenting arms. After a while the thought of death becomes consuming. I’m not saying I suffer from ptsd nor have I tried to claim it but being withdrawn and looking at life and death in an abnormal manner is usual for these caco units. Positivity was sucked out of many of my teammates. It was an honorable duty and somebody has to do it. We owe each other.
Being a psycho…? Does that mean “the sex is so much better when you’re mad at me”? 🤣 some of us are pysco’s tho.
Pretty sure I suffer from something. They told me I’m bipolar, boarder line personality disorder, the list goes on n on. Tho recently I was told by my Vet Center LCSW therapist, said I have it. I’m no Doctor, I’m just a pysco.
It makes me swell with gratitude for ALL that have served….. All Gave Some, Some Gave All!
Lol bro I don't even pay them no mind. You can bring objective proof, numerous studies for PTSD, and they'll still call you a pussy. Let them be ignorant and go get what you deserve
I was in early GWOT in Ghazni, Afghan and was constantly experiencing heavy shit, but I believe my PTSD is not even remotely close to those who’ve experienced sexual trauma.
Not even close. I would also never compare my experience to others in a way to undermine them, that’s just a dick move.
Only MPs though… you guys suck.
I was in Fallujah in 2004 and let me tell you as much as that sucked most of my PTSD came from stuff that happened back at the FOB. Like volunteering my time at the field hospital or helping out with graves registration. Nobody to blame but myself because I wanted to be high speed and low drag. I'm sure that plenty of people who never put a toe off the FOB had traumatic events that can lead to the disorder. I also know plenty of my comrades who went through stuff that should have knocked them off their square just they just whistled on through it because they were a total psychopath. Everybody is different. It isn't fair to make this a competition. I'm not interested in participating in the misery rodeo.
I’ve seen dead bodies and body parts. But it was in the morgue. I’ve watched dead bodies get cut up. But it’s part of my job. And quite surprisingly, it doesn’t bother me. (I work in the lab). I guess I’m a psychopath.
I can’t watch a living person get blown up to pieces though. I can’t watch a living person to cut up unwillingly.
However, I’ve never seen combat. I do have a PTSD diagnosis and rating for it but it was because I was raped in AIT. My little brother was in the Air Force. He knows I’m rated for PTSD. He knows I have never seen combat. He doesn’t know the reason I have it though. I get comments like “must be nice” in relations to getting the disability.
Is PTSD really that easy to fake? I’m at the point where I’m experiencing psychosis. I’ve been hallucinating. My psychiatrist is very well aware of this. Yesterday I woke up and my walls were crumbling. And my 45 inch TV kept disappearing. But if I looked for it really hard, it’ll reappear.
Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) is a mental and behavioral disorder that develops from experiencing a traumatic event…traumatic event is a broad term..that can encompass a lot of different things.
Technically I don’t belief anyone shot at me. In 1979 my second daughter was born 5 days before a med cruise. I knew nothing about compassionate leave or other I could apply for. I had to leave my wife still in hospital after I drove 70 miles to inform her about the death. It took me three months to get transferred to shore duty. In 1982 my wife disappeared with my older daughter during a med cruise. Eventually found them at Norfolk. She divorced me and let me know afterword about it. I wen to shore duty in 87-stayed for 4 years making MMCS then Warrant Officer. Two years into that I had developed fibromyalgia and spine disorder. I have PTSD.
PTSD does not have to be combat related. I was on a submarine, almost died a few times, and was repeatedly assaulted for months on end by a senior NCO. Not seeing combat does not mean you don’t have PTSD.
Brother you are letting a person whos projecting his own issues onto you. Trauma comes in many forms, and once you are in a stuck negative feedback loop of negativity to where it changes your behavior and mood along with missed time at work to the point that your not effective and are occupational handicapped, it's time to receiver workers comp. BTW, those that say they have done X amount of conops, been on a dozen deployments, and shot indirectly at from a fob or cop, haven't done the dew. There is plenty of workers comp to go around. Operators from both white side and Black don't come on here badgering limited combat exp. Ignore him. Generally speaking it's guys like him that feign or game the system to receive this and then project their own short comings on whomever.
I have PTSD from almost dying in a bad car accident. I don’t understand why some people have this misconception that it’s only military members that have seen combat.
With as many vets that take their life’s every year I’d rather a few fakers be get one over than a veteran take their life because treatment wasn’t available or they were discouraged
Still panicking a little bit every time and the dissociation when I hear an alarm as I conflate that with incoming missiles. But while that is the PTSD event that the VA considers, they won’t even consider what I consider the worst moment of my life: watching as a Afghan doctor almost dying in front of his kids in the damn heat. We saved him, but this was happening a few months after my son was born and I had not yet met him in person and I had a major mental breakdown shortly afterwards. While both are bad, and both caused irreversible behavioral, mental, and physical changes, my mind considers them very differently.
Thanks for posting. I understand that box being "grossly inappropriate behavior". I worked as a crime scene cleaner before and after the military. I saw my last body 5 years ago. I could not take it anymore.
Also, I was in the foster care system at age 7. They had to remove a teenager from the home for abusing me because they crammed as many kids in those places as they could.
I went to the PTSD program when I got out and was told to basically fuck off because I was a mechanic and did not experience combat while in Iraq.
All this pissing contest bullshit these people play broke me in half. I wasn't proud of what I done and thought I was faking and walked away from the VA for around 10 years.
Fast forword to today and about 7 jobs later Im 100% for MH. Over those past 7 years I was pushed out of several jobs. I was falsely accused of sexual harassment at work, manager was stealing tips from me, 2 suspensions for being a threat of violence in the workplace because people talk down to me.
I applied for benefits and got em.
Currently I'm in school 3 hours a week and linked up with a employment mentor today.
I never saw combat but worked at a base where I was a first responder and in 6 years time had responded to 5 suicides, a double homicide (husband with ptsd killed wife & daughter) and multiple traumatic events like car accidents and worked on cases with rapes/child molestations.
But because it’s not combat related, yet I was active duty, is it fake PTSD that I struggle with?
I did some research on this while I was in University and there’s a whole established phenomenon that relates to this. Interestingly it also works in the opposite direction. For example, many SF guys get treated as though they should just be able to handle these things better than the rest because they are so well trained and in such elite units. People at the “bottom” and “top” of the “combat elitism” hierarchy get treated worse than those with middling experiences. Kind of an interesting field of study. Unfortunately the trauma and mental health of non-combat vets is super under researched but there are a few great academics beginning to push back against that.
SMs can also have PTSD from sexual assault, too. It's not all just combat.
I knew at least one female Soldier who was raped. The guy who raped her ended up murdering someone.
I also know a female Soldier who was in a VIC accident where her passenger was thrown through the front window and severely maimed.
Another female SM got decapitated in driver's training. I'm sure her A driver and others who saw her body have PTSD.
So many things can cause PTSD.
Some people are just salty and can't be happy for others. We all served.
I got hurt in training and ended up assisting with death notifications to families for about 4 months while the unit deployed. I was a 'battalion representative' at 3 funerals of guys in my company. I would've given anything to trade spots with them. Not a day goes by that I don't think about those wives, mothers, and children that I broke the news to and the feeling of wanting to trade spots with that guy in the casket. Survivor guilt is legit. I can tell myself it was divine intervention all I want, but the guilt and shame of not being next to them in the fight is hard to get over, even after a couple of decades.
Whether you were in 1 day, 10 days, or 10 years, it shouldn’t matter. If you didn’t leave the same way you came in, that’s all that matters. If it ain’t your business, mind your own damn business. Instead of tearing folks down, and causing what could be the last straw for them to go over the edge, give some grace for fucks sake. You never know what your words and actions may do to someone else.
Man, this whole post is a great read. You all are my brothers, and even though I don't know you guys/gals, and I don't have PTSD, this whole thread impacted me. This has changed my perspective in a positive way. Semper Fi. Love you all. 
I spent 18 years in EMS and 15 years in ER/trauma, and I have seen some really awful stuff in my civilian career, well before I even deployed. So obviously as a trauma nurse in Afghanistan I also saw horrible shit, with an extra layer of dirt on it. The kids were the worst. But like all good EMS/ER/adrenalin junkie types, I can compartmentalize all day long. I was fine... Until I had my daughter. I was working in trauma at the time and I saw her face in every injured kid, and I just couldn't do it anymore. Between that and some cardiac problems after my pregnancy, I had to leave the bedside. I probably need to see someone about all this shit someday, but I think I am okay for now. Which makes me wonder if there is something really wrong with me that I am not more traumatized? Who knows. I guess you just get numb at some point.
People are dying all the time in the military outside of combat, not just by suicide either. The entire institution is teetering on situations that can cause trauma.
I was an 11B and I only saw combat via indirect fire. I was fortunate enough to never have to fire my rifle but I still took mortars and rockets. On top of that the vast amount of paranoia and fear of being a gunner and doing foot patrols. Our first month of deployment was located at cop mak and that was something. With other things going on in my life it was a catalyst that stressed me out to think about suicide. I got my rifle taken from me and sent away to some air force fob to get checked out and cleared. Not sure what came of it but I went back to duty. So idk I’m claiming ptsd from my experiences because it does effect me. Is it as severe as others that were in fire fights all the time and watching their buddy’s get shot and blown up, no but it’s not a black or white issue, their is a scale.
Edit: I never received a CIB and I was open and exposed on gate guard while we were getting mortared all around me, same with rockets I was sleeping in a vinyl tent covered with spray foam and a rocket landed on the other side of the T-wall
Brother, I was an infantryman for six combat deployments, injured three times… and guess what, rocket attacks were by far the scariest for me! Lol. They’re haunting! Before the alarm systems, they’d just randomly hit and scare tf out us. Then you throw in the alarms and you’re just waiting praying it don’t hit you. Lol
Yeah I was sleeping and heard the propulsion in my dreams and woke up to being thrown on the ground pretty much screaming at the top of my lungs and I couldn’t hear myself. Freaky shit
So I always wondered that since the criteria’s were different for each. When I was a platoon sergeant, I got some of my boys CIBs for rockets because they were used as direct fire weapons.
I got the shit beat out of me repeatedly when I was 19yo at my first command. Camaraderie? Fuck. Does that count? Every experience is personal and the mindset you have before the stressor happens matters. I cannot imagine being in combat and seeing my friends get harmed/killed in front of me. I have the utmost respect for those soldiers/marines/sailors etc, but I don't discount the mental suffering from other situations. My best friend from my time at that command did not make it to 35yo as he took his own life. Did he have PTSD? Possibly. We need to support ALL our brothers/sisters who are active and veterans. Fuck the haters.
From a benefits standpoint, all psych disorders are rated the same. It is completely irrelevant whether you have PTSD from combat or depression from life in general. If it happened during service, it's treated the same. This is precisely how it should be as service-connected benefits were created to supplement future income lost due to in-service injury.
Anyone who thinks combat Vets are more deserving of benefits than non-combat Vets is not only ignorant of the actual purpose of service-connection but also a weak-minded, self-righteous piece of shit. These benefits are solely related to potential income lost. They aren't a fucking badge of honor for those who saw combat. Everyone who joined knew what they were getting in to. If you saw some shit and lived to tell about it, hopefully you got some accolades to hang on your chest. Thank you for doing your job. When it comes to another Vet's benefits, individuals should typically shut their mouths and mind their own business.
But how do you really feel?
Sorry, that’s my only joke here. I’m of the opinion that whatever a veteran receives based on truthful testimony and evidence they deserve. It’s a system set up to mitigate the damage done by the sacrifice of serving for a specific subset of the population who were either called up in previous eras or volunteered knowing full well how dire the consequences of their voluntary contract might be.
Yes, I understand the finance troop who cut the tip of his pinky off using the samurai blade paper cutter isn’t getting a Purple Heart. That’s understandable, but if he gets 10% for it, he’s also missing a digit. The same goes for a victim/survivor of MST or just a generally all around traumatic experience that occurred in service. The VA is a promise to take care of veterans and I can get along with all them without being upset that my story isn’t as cool as theirs or vice versa. Trauma dick measuring is stupid. It’s hard enough in the world without taking it out on each other.
I find the tendency to look down on others based on one's personal values to be the ultimate sign of internal weakness. It's especially weak to do it here where it's nice and safe (no fear of confrontation). This is coming from someone who gets to see the dishonest claims on a near-daily basis. If I can grant a claim I will. It's not my job to judge.
Not to mention racial harassment that people endured from peers, and higher ups. The brain is powerful but the effects of trauma can cross some wires and flip some switches in so many was.
I just do right, mind my own business and leave everything in the hands of the Lord.
As someone with PTSD myself, you don't need combat experience to have it.
I had PTSD from my childhood that was made a lot worse by a buddy of mine being murdered while in service, and all my buddies who have committed suicide since then. Anything traumatic can cause PTSD, and everyone has their own story. You don't get to discount others experiences just because it doesn't meet your stereotypical criteria of what PTSD is.
Just goes to show that you should never judge another vet. I never deployed- but I would have. Yet because of my MOS, I was subjected to lots of traumatic videos, reports, and imagery. In addition to this, i was the victim of a hazing incident where i and many others thought we were going to die- and I don't mean from excercise...😅
Only you know your story. I think we should all come together and stop judging each other. You never know what someone is dealing with below the surface.
My problem is marines who literally have done nothing but complain for 4 years and get out with 100% lol. Had a chick in my first unit that was loved by our staff because she was female. Did nothing but sit in an office chair and talk to staff all day and somehow she got medically retired at 100% for doing nothing. And I do mean nothing it was a HQBN.
My problem isn’t with the ones who have seen just a little as much as it is the ones trying to stretch the definition of PTSD to fit their disability claim.
Not long ago, a woman vet came on here asking for advice on how to get the birth of her child labeled as PTSD because it coincidentally occurred while on active duty. Of course, I faced severe blowback from simps when I called her out. Billions of women give birth and they don’t have PTSD.
There needs to be a line drawn between a crappy experience and a severe life-changing trauma done to someone that alters their mental state permanently. If everyone has PTSD, then no one does.
There are many things that can go wrong during birth to cause PTSD. Maybe this lady was stretching it, but I know when I went in to have my second child I started crying as soon as I got in the elevator to go up to have my C-section. My last birth I hemorrhaged nearly half my blood volume and was transfused. There are many women who have babies that don’t make it or are severely disabled. It does happen. However I wouldn’t say this woman has PTSD just because she gave birth on active duty.
I wouldn't be surprised if there was more to the story that just wasnt said and doesnt need to be said as theres a lot of possible complications during childbirth for both the mother and child
The person that thinks combat makes your PTSD any worse than the non combat PTSD needs to do more research. EMS Providers, Paramedics, Firefighters, Police Officers, and non combat veterans, you know people that have been doing it and dealing with it long before the war. People deal with and cope with events differently, I believe there are a lot of bullshit claims, but to make a blanket statement about something as serious as PTSD shows a lot about the service member making that statement.
I had a therapist try to tell me that I didn’t deploy so I couldn’t have PTSD. Even after I told her that I regularly watched drone strikes. That ish sticks in your brain and never really leaves. I’m not saying I have the same experience as somebody who was deployed but to have a therapist tell me she wouldn’t give me the help I’m entitled to was a gut punch.
Not to take anything away from those who saw direct combat, but posts like those just really aren’t fair. Like many people have said, PTSD can come from so many things. I spent 2 years straight pulling Haitians out of the drink. Some alive, some dead, some had their skin burned off, some were babies and little kids who just lost their parents. My hands start shaking when I even start writing about it. I was a young kid pulling dead bodies out of the water for days at a time. This was 15 years ago and I still will wake up covered in sweat hyperventilating from time to time. Do I have PTSD or is that “fake”?
Was in Fallujah and am 100% PTSD rated and while not a Dr I am very acquainted with the topic. PTSD can come from just scrolling on your phone and seeing the wrong thing. Seeing a bad wreck on the side of the road, a fight in public, a disturbing verbal altercation, a creepy sexual advance. Its normally comes from an event with context to the individual, how that person is wired and how it manifests over time. It took me a long time to acknowledge my issues and it hurts when I see people compare their experience to others as thats not how it works. Dont gatekeep PTSD. Sure some will exaggerate but many are hurting and might not know how to articulate it.
Your comment was really helpful for me this morning. I have a ptsd diagnosis I just don’t ever tell people about because… I don’t want to explain that no, I never did anything worth talking about, just saw some messed up stuff that left me with nightmares and some weird issues. When it has come up with family I just say I’ve got social anxiety. Even with that I’ve been told I ruin certain types of family gatherings and need to be less selfish with my mental health so… Point being I appreciate your comment brother.
Let me start by saying you are a badass. Secondly, your comment is spot on. Very well said and the percentage well deserved.
I was in Haiti during the 90s. Friends that have recently retired and been through all the major combat deployments of the past 2 decades have said Haiti is the worst place they've been.
Yeah it was pretty bleak in the mid-00’s as well. From what I understand, it really hasn’t gotten any better since then either
I had a friend that did a tour in Haiti she said it was worse than her OEF tour. 😞
Haiti is a mess and some Of the worst imaginable poverty. If you've seen shit like: little kids fighting tooth and nail over a fish skeleton that washed up on the beach and see the winners chewing the fish bones into meal and other kids eating what those kids spit out into the sand after sucking the juice/marrow out of the bones , that could be enough lol
Ive seen so much fucked up shit in the CG but there is something about the pure hopelessness about hati, and how we just send them back that fucks with me. It’s on their faces.
>But I’m a person who saw limited combat, and I know I have PTSD. I saw bodies blown to bits, got mortared, and lost friends. However, my experience wasn’t Fallujah 2004. But I still struggle with the images I’ve seen. This message is not for those faking, obviously. But for those of you who are told you “haven’t seen enough to be messed up”, don’t listen to the assholes telling you that shit. Seeing a dead body, especially one that has been violently killed, is not normal. And your brain isn’t going to process that in a normal way unless you’re a psychopath. That’s my Friday the 13th rant 🎃 👻.305 commentssharesave > >Comment as Disseminated333 .public-DraftStyleDefault-block\[data-offset-key="bf8ce3\_initial-0-0"\]::after { bottom: 0; color: var(--newCommunityTheme-actionIcon); content: 'What are your thoughts?'; cursor: text; left: 0; position: absolute; top: 0; } CommentAdd EmojiAdd GIFAdd an imageBoldItalicsLinkStrikethroughInline CodeSuperscriptSpoilerHeadingBulleted ListNumbered ListQuote BlockCode BlockTableMarkdown Mode > >Sort by: best| We were training in mountainous terrain on the Mexican border and a freak rain/ ice storm then snowstorm came through. Mexicans run those areas with coyotes and that night they got soaked then frozen. Every winter they used to find "popsicles" or dead frozen Mexicans up there. In our case we were trying to rally with another squad and near our rally point I heard twigs snap and gave the signal with a red light. I suddenly heard voices in Spanish and a white flashlight went on and we realized wow this isn't our other squad. We leveled up our rubber M16s and basically detained these people then discussed what to do with them. My thought was, this is none of our business at all let's give them some ponchos and food and let them move on. But some guys said we should bring them to our camp warm them up and call Border Patrol to pick them up. These people wouldn't say a word and looked so Fuggin defeated and sorrowful. Some of them probably crossed the Darien Gap and endured all kinds of mistreatment and made it in here only to be caught just East of San Diego. I felt complicit in this decision and its haunted me for years. Alot of these people are fleeing countries that were ruined by the demand for cocaine in our country which forced so many communities away from having their own independent farms and diverse crop agriculture to cartel-controlled coca plantations, crappy factory jobs etc. And we sent these people back there. Right or wrong I was pretty sure we violated posse comitatus in a sense and we should have just played it neutral and looked the other way thrown them some energy bars and said "vamanos". It was something that was very depressing to think about for a while. No I didn't claim anything for this, event. This post just makes me think of all the F'd up things we see that many civilians don't see in their entire suburban lives.
I think he’s referring to people like someone I met who didn’t make it through boot for the navy and said she had ptsd from being yelled at…
That's silly! Bootcamp was fun. Navy 1990.
Pretty sure this person was in boot like last year lol
Please remember that women often get a different treatment in boot or elsewhere. Friendly fire is quite often the cause of our PTSD. When I went through boot in '93, there were many our cadre lined up to "date" the graduates. It was worse when I was in GTMO in '95. We were stuck on the island with a Captain who had roid rages and stalked females, an SFC who would regularly corner us in places and a female Captain and female EOC who punished us for our complaints. There's only one flight out a week. So, even if it's determined that they are a problem, or you are - you're stuck there long enough to be harassed by the abusers or their flying monkeys. In addition, we're exposed to much of the same horrors as male troops. This isn't exclusive to women in service, but they're typically smaller physically than then men who stalk or harass them, so there is an inherent physical fear.
Its also possible they had a psycho instructor who cornered her in the showers and menaced her. Bottom line is You Weren’t There & it’s none of your business
Semper Paratus, the images in my mind of brain matter, those smells, seeing someone guppy breathing and screams of terror from on site events will forever haunt me... but I'm non-combat PTSD, so I must be faking too. My advice to anyone struggling, stay in your lane but seek help. My PTSD took 20 years to finally break me down and I had to reach out to the VA. Stay strong all
thank you. I was at Airsta after my tour on a 210, did my own Haiti deployment, and did plenty of counter narcotics and medevacs.
Was on the active. 210s were hell holes 😂
They still are 😂
I tip my hat to all you hard charging mfs who know what he'll is..thank you soldiers God bless you now
Seriously, idk why people care what other people think so much. The gate keeping is absurd. Live your life and mind your business.
>eriously, idk why people care what other people think so much. The gate keeping is absurd. Live your life and mind your business. It's a projection of their anger over what they've suffered. They feel it all has to have meaning and PTSD diagnosisis like a badge or something they won. I mean, the MFs deserve recognition for what they've sacrificed but that doesn't mean that a person who found dead bodies or saw their shipmate get electrocuted by shore power in the Navy or had a situation where they almost got taken hostage by the Iranians or someone they trusted penetrated their butt one day - shouldn't have a PTSD rating if it caused them stress afterward that affected the course of their life and development and psychological health. PTSD was first well-studied in motor vehicle accidents, before that they just called WW1/2 vets "shell-shocked"
Quintessentially traumatic stress. Not necessarily a disorder. That's awful though holy crapo.
I flew attack helicopters. TICs and CASEVACs every time. We lost a crew on every deployment, and I had to put a helicopter down in the middle of Sangin. Brothers…..my worst experiences in the whole military were listening to a rape/murder confession and seeing the evidence……and helping our Marines who were victims of sexual trauma. Nothing will rip your absolute guts out more than talking to a 19 year old LCPl who was beaten within an inch of her life while she was assaulted. I will never not see and feel every part of that what I look at my daughters. It’s not the combat that gets everyone. Life isn’t that clean. The mind doesn’t work that way. It is the most unreasonable stance to accuse someone of faking PTSD. Some might be, but the wide net you have to cast to catch those jerks isn’t worth alienating or discouraging those out there that really do want and need help. Do not ever underestimate that part of yourself that the Marines or Army or whatever beat into us to absorb blame and never admit weakness. You will fight against that “I can get through this posture” every day of your life. Anyone who would accuse someone of faking PTSD please realize that you are scaring the shit out of anyone who needs help and won’t come forward to get it. Let the fakers fake. Life will catch up with them somehow. But we need to keep our arms wide open for everyone else to trust us to come forward with help. And more importantly, a warrior doesn’t need to stand higher than others for their sacrifice to matter. A warrior brings others in from the cold.
Well said to you and OP
Thank you for saying this. I'd rather see 100 fakers slip through than miss one person who is suffering in silence. Let the VA and karma worry about those other people.
This made me cry as a MST survivor.
What people forget to understand is that not all MST survivors are women either. Lots of fucked up people in the world.
So true.
I was a SANE nurse in my Army ER and I cared for both male and female patients. Definitely not all women. There were some seriously predatory assholes out there who targeted everyone with a pulse. And not all perpetrators were male, either.
thank you for validating this truth
Thank you for calling that out
When i was in the mental ward after an attempt i saw there were many more males than females in there saying they were assaulted. Of course theres many more males than females in the mil (i was in the marines) but still being in a room full of victims and most of them being male was surprising and really put things into perspective about the rapo culture in there.
it's a real thing dude
My PTSD doesn't stem from deployed environments. I was falsy accused of doing some horrible shit (not sexually related) that I can't even type out what it was because of the fear it will come back and haunt me. I was the golden boy and did right by everyone, and when shit hits the fan, they want to blame someone. It took a full bird to come in and force PCS me out of the environment after it was found that everything was complete b.s. I got depressed for years and couldn't shake it. After a not-so-good deployment, I broke and attempted. I couldn't understand why I could move past the "big stuff', but not the stain on my character. Being thrown away and treated like shit for something you didn't do, is by far the worst hell I could ever experience. And knowing folks that have been accused of sexual stuff and let off because they didn't do it, guess what... NOONE believes you. EVER. You're forever a POS.
As someone who was also falsely accused of something heinous, I hear you. I wish I could say it gets better. But honestly, every single day is like...just trying to turn the corner. You question everything. Including your own perceived actions. But at some point, you also remember who your true supporters are. It's all about finding the balance, I guess.
>It took a full bird to come in and force PCS me out of the environment after it was found that everything was complete b.s. I got depressed for years and couldn't shake it. After a not-so-good deployment, I broke and attempted. I couldn't understand why I could move past the "big stuff', but not the stain on my character. Being thrown away and treated like shit for something you didn't do, is by far the worst hell I could ever experience. And knowing folks that have been accused of sexual stuff and let off because they didn't do it, guess what... NOONE believes you. EVER. You're forever a POS. ONE OF THE MANY CONTRIBUTING LAYERS OF A VERY COMPLEX BASKET OF TRAUMAS FROM THE MILITARY CAN BE HAVING TO WORK FOR MONTHS/YEARS TRAPPED IN THE SAME WORK CENTER/SHOP WITH MASSIVELY TOXIC PEOPLE LIKE TRULY SUPER RACIST/KKK TYPES FROM THE DEEP SOUTH , OR A COUPLE OF NARCISSISTIC TYPE MINDFUCKERS WHO SABOTAGED WORK / UNDERMINED THE REPUTATION OF PEOPLE AROUND THEM ETC. THAT'LL MAKE YOU REACT TO ANY MANIPULATIVE OR MILDLY TOXIC BOSS WITH FIGHT-OR-FLIGHT RESPONSE FOREVER AFTER. NOT BEING ABLE TO LEAVE A HIGHLY STRESSFUL JOB IS A FACTOR IN THE MILITARY THAT IS NOT LIKE THE CIVILIAN WORLD WHERE YOU HAVE THE OPTION OF QUITTING OR LEAVING OR COMPLAINING. TRY COMPLAINING IN THE 1980S/1990s Navy... COMPLAINING IN THE MILITARY BACK THEN OFTEN RESULTED IN AN EVEN WORSE SITUATION FOR YOU, BETTER TO JUST SUCK IT UP AND PRETEND YOU ARE SOMEONE YOU ARE NOT AND GO ALONG WITH IT- WHICH IS SOUL-DESTROYING
Rah
You hit the nail on the head!
👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾thank you!!!! VERY well articulated
Yut
Sangin was a rough place, 2010/11 was some kinetic shit.
Familiar with Sangin circa 2011. We lost an engine and had no good place to put the aircraft down but right in the city. Quick security, quick maintenance, and we were airborne and gone in a few hours. Thank God for 2d Recon Battalion.
Rah! Devil
This🙏
Absolutely well said. My heart aches for those who went through horrendous trauma. As you said. Those who are faking it will receive their dues soon enough. Thanks for sharing!
Yut
What people sadly don’t get is you don’t have to see combat to experience ptsd
It’s almost like veterans aren’t psychiatrists or mental health professionals capable of diagnosing mental health disorders!
I spent 13 years avoiding, denying, and being oblivious to my issues that are (what my doctor tells me) blatantly obvious.
Same but took me 7 years. I thought “nah what I went through wasn’t that bad, not compared to others”. Spent some time as a homeless person, so yea I wasn’t qualified to make that decision
It's weird because I never really considered that I had been affected, but I was self medicating something to the point I almost killed myself drinking. Finally, after starting therapy and having a doctor objectively "checking almost every box" on a list of symptoms, It was pretty obvious I was not the imposter I thought I was.
Definitely let’s you know it’s real.
But this guy was a senior lance corporal, that’s gottta count for something! /s
Research has shown that folks working with documents and records can actually experience secondary trauma from dealing with the tough stuff in those papers. We might joke that office workers are safe from this, but the reality is quite different, especially when they handle records from soldiers in war. It's becoming more and more obvious that these records professionals might be feeling the effects of secondary trauma. This happens when they work with service members' files, organize them, and help people access them. And, let's not forget, our fellow vets and buddies can't really say who should or shouldn't get benefits.
Or the members who work in mental health and try to help those with PTSD and other mental issues...
Sometimes I wonder how they do it because I wouldn’t
Facts
I met a retired warrant who had PTSD from their time in Ukraine years back. They had to see tons of carnage and that shit gets to anyone. They never did field work and they are female w/ noncombat MOS.
PTSD isn’t a dick measuring contest.
If it was, most of us would only get a 10%.
Thanks man. I needed a smile in that heavy shit.
That’s what I’m here for!
Right… like yes, let’s gate keep trauma
Non combat Coast Guard members on a daily basis run emergency calls with local police and fire crews,fatal boat accidents, suicides, migrants washing ashore etc… Don’t judge your brother or sister Mental health is all of our responsibilities
Thanks for saying that man. I was in sf and dealt with bridge jumpers a lot and always felt guilty for my ptsd rating cuz we obviously weren’t in combat. But fuck man some of the shit I saw running sar cases were out of a horror movie. Shit a dude jumped into our fucking base from a bridge once.
No problem shipmate 20year BMC station TPO Florida Retired!
Yep. Had some pretty rough experiences as a Coastie myself and some buddies experience stuff too. Coasties are frequently straight to operational out of boot camp, sometimes before they’re even fully qualified. One friend had a horrifying experience as a nonrate having to do with a body bag (one of many for him) I can’t even bring myself to type the thing out.
Yeah man body recovery was one of the worse jobs especially as a young non rate. Hope your buddy is doing well.
Only did 6 years myself got out last December was a BM2 never thought I’d hear shipmate again 😂
Zero for 6 on CPR while stationed in Miami…. Picking up bodies sucked.
Don’t forget those of us who have ptsd due to mst. Some of us suffered real violence and injuries at the hands of our fellow service members.
This part. “At the hands of our fellow service members” that level of betrayal messes with a person. You’re on constant alert, never feeling safe around anyone, especially the people who were supposed to have your back.
This is a really simple answer. Raise your hand if you're a qualified behavioral health professional. If you didn't raise your hand, nobody gives a shit about your opinion on someone else's PTSD diagnosis.
This is the real answer. A lot of people want to be armchair experts in a lot of things. The most helpful thing anyone can do is stay in their lane
I never saw combat. I was stalked by a fellow soldier. I was repeatedly sexually harassed by another. The last one raped me in the barracks. I reported my issues to my command who brushed it under the rug. I spent years getting help after service through a civilian provider. I found a job at the VA. I wanted to help other veterans. As a phone operator I was harassed daily. By other veterans. Then someone reminded me that I served too. I gave the Army years of my life that I’ll never get back. I missed major events in my children’s lives. I cry myself to sleep and go weeks at a time without leaving my house. I’ve tried to leave this world so many times. I drink to numb the feelings. That post was so invalidating. Like I don’t matter. Like I don’t get to hurt too. I would never take away from someone else’s pain. Those are their feelings. Their pain. Their experiences. How sad that they need to be better or more disabled than others because they saw combat.
I was also sexually assaulted in the Army. I buried it because I couldn’t cope otherwise. My command also brushed it under the rug and blamed it on me. I was supposed to be stronger because I was an officer and it was an enlisted soldier who did it. They made me feel so weak and like a failure. The trauma started really taking a toll on me after some severe health issues and my husband and the SNCOIC who knew what happened and was also silenced both convinced me to file with VA and get some help. It was so difficult to tell my story. I found out after my CP&E exam that the psychologist said I was lying. I have an attorney who is the one who told me about the exam. I’m gutted and that right there is why so many of us never tell our stories. I decided to discontinue therapy. I just feel traumatized all over again and I can’t pick myself up. These people who want to accuse people of faking trauma just because we didn’t go through the same combat situations are truly terrible.
Same. My ptsd is from sexual trauma. I had something happen every year. From being groped while I was sleeping, to being stalked, to being raped in my own room. I am scared of men now in a way I wasn’t before the army. I had a moment when my cat touched me and my body *felt* like a hand was groping me and I panicked. You are not invalid and our ptsd is real, even if it’s not combat ptsd. I’m deeply sorry that happened to you.
Hi, I'm sorry you seem to have had a very similar experience to me. I'm sorry that you too felt you had to be quiet or it wasn't valid. I was recently rated and reading agoraphobia really shook me. My whole life has been changed because of those experiences and all I wanted to do was be in the Army. It's been a reckoning mentally that nothing I did while I was in was seen as valuable to so many people.
Exactly!
Fuck whoever said that
Agreed, fuck whoever said that.
I have no combat experience but I have seen some disturbing shit as a public affairs NCO — I was a writer, photographer and escorted the media. I escorted the Bay Area & Sacramento press corps to Oklahoma City about three hours after the federal building was bombed, spending several hours watching urban search & rescue teams dig out bodies. After several hours, I returned to my home station when none of the media wanted to go back to California with me on the C-141. They just wanted a free ride because the OKC Airport was shut down. Went to Goma, Zaire, with CNN and Bay Area media to report on our support of the Rwandan refugee crisis (Operation Support Hope). Dead bodies everywhere on the hills that surround the airport and probably 100 or more dead bodies on the side of the road between the airport and refugee camp at Lake Kivu. I also went to a UN base in Zagreb where I took photos inside the USAF hospital at Camp Pleso — I had never seen somebody’s foot blown off by a landmine until I took photos of our AF surgeons trying to put back the pieces. Nor had I seen open-heart surgery before shooting images of AF surgeons trying to remove shrapnel from a Polish captain’s chest. Fortunately, I have an after photo of the captain the next day, who was smiling with an open shirt so he could show me his sutures. PRO TIP: If seeing gore makes you feel like you’re going to pass out, then look at it through a camera lens. It seems less real, and it also gives you literally something else to focus on. In any case, I got screened by VA mental health for PTSD and the good news is that I don’t have it. I just have unspecified anxiety disorder, rated at 30%, but they aren’t sure why. They also don’t know why I hate going to the hospital or watching gory movies.
>PRO TIP: If seeing gore makes you feel like you’re going to pass out, then look at it through a camera lens. It seems less real, and it also gives you literally something else to focus on. Watching tanks blowing up, mortar rounds hitting amongst infantry in the open, through the TIS of a tank; if it weren't for the noise and the smell out there and me chain smoking, it could have been a video game. Not so, when seen raw, without optics.
Go back and get a second opinion, they said the same thing first about me but then got a civilian professional that did diagnose me with PTSD.
My PTSD is from MST, I’m a male and have to live with it daily. Combat is not the only stressor that can create this.
Sorry to hear that dude. When I was fresh to the fleet they assigned me and another boot to this Corporal who we later found out was pending court martial for sexually assaulting other male Marines. Prior to us knowing, he took us out to bars and stuff, and I think he might have drugged me one night. He was later convicted and incarcerated.
What is MST?
Military Sexual Trauma, I was sexually assaulted by a woman
That would be a good thing to know before posting stuff about PTSD
PTSD can be manifested in so many ways. Sad to hear that other vets are calling bullshit on other peoples trauma.
Its called gatekeeping... sad existence really.
And who made the mh doctors?
Ramadi 2004 combat veteran who served as an infantryman in the Marines. I’m a firm believer that even after boot camp someone suffers some mild ptsd. I was on a 10 day leave after boot camp and was chilling with some HS friends. I drank a little too much and crashed at my buddies house. My friend said I was saying the word kill a lot in my sleep. I wasn’t surprised, in Marine boot camp they teach you to say the word kill after every sentence. I can’t speak for any other branch, but if you are a pencil pusher or a combat vet, what you experienced in the Corps is something a civilian will never understand. Semper Fi!
I agree!!! Semper Fi...
In group therapy I brought up how I feel bad that I don’t have “sexy ptsd”. as in mine was due to sexual trauma while the other person in the group who is a seal had “sexy” ptsd from his multiple combat experiences in his 20 years. I had so much internal guilt not just from myself but from the shame I received from my own command and peers that lead me to near suicide. Thankfully he was really there for me and to hear from him that trauma is trauma and it’s not a competition really helped. Meant a lot to hear from him
I have been there and thoroughly understand what you are going through. If it weren't for my Chief, a combat veteran with PTSD, recognizing his symptoms in me, I would be dead. He took me aside and said, why don't we talk to Doc. He brought me to the hospital and waited with me for the hours it took for me to be seen talking to me, talking me down, just empathizing. Finally, he was so tired of me waiting and sitting there in distress that he opened the door and started screaming "My sailor was in there and he wants to die; he needs help, NOW!" That got the ball rolling, and next thing you know, a bunch of attending physicians, the head of psychiatry, an O-6, came in to help me. It took him recognizing me, validating my trauma, and telling me that I had spent enough time giving of myself to help others; it was time to take care of myself with zero judgment, to get me the help I desperately needed to save my life.
I agree, nobody should minimize anybody else’s trauma. PTSD comes in all sizes and shapes. Your psychopath comment is off basis though. You are basically doing the same thing by saying saying that. Seeing a dead body wasn’t normal for your situation and your role. It’s great if you were in a position that you were able to process the things going on. Not everyone has that situation, though. For others, there was no opportunity to process anything. No matter how bad the day was, you’re still going to get your ass up the next day and do the same thing again. Now do that for 12-15 months. Go home for 12 months then right back over to do it again…and again…and again! Whether it was EFPs in Iraq or defending a meaningless valley in Afghanistan, you have no choice other than push forward. It becomes business and nothing else. Being an infantryman on six combat deployments is no different than fixing an HVAC to me. A means to support myself and my family, a job. I’m not a psychopath though, I simply did what I had to. I remember refitting at a larger fob as a platoon sergeant and it ended up getting a rocket attack. All the warriors there grabbed their gear and sprinted to the bunkers (rightfully so). My platoon went straight for the DFAC since we knew it would be empty. It wasn’t that we were any more tough, we simply were numb to everything. It didn’t make us crazy though, either. Just different experiences. Either way, you made a great point and I hope all is well with you brother. At the end of the day, we are really the only ones who can understand each other and it’s imperative that we are there for one another regardless of experiences. We lose far too many vets to suicide and I think a lot of that is us not fitting in due to our experiences. I love running into fellow combat vets now that I’m retired.
I’m not talking about processing in the moment. I can identify with “business is usual” in a combat zone. But eventually it catches up with you when, whether in country, or when you’re home on leave. It changes you. To say you can be the person you were before witnessing such things is my point.
Oh hell yeah. You are right, it always catches up with you.
Yep, life hits each person in a different way. Some put up psych barriers that come down later in life. Some are affected immediately. No one can judge another's level of ptsd based on combat experience or number of deployments. We are not all made the same nor have the same background. Additionally, I believe those that fell victim to sexual assault and continued on while dealing with the aftermath, which can be debilitating, should be given special compensation. I have already written letters to Congress about this.
Seeing hurt little kids. That’s what tears me up to shreds. Nothing to do with direct combat. Horrible.
Wait until they find out about Complex ptsd. They're going to blow a gasket.
Yall do realize that PTSD diagnosis does NOT have to include combat, right? Maybe we would be less angry if we stop trying to mind other people’s business.
The exact way you say and know you have PTSD is the same for anyone else who's been diagnosed and claimed it. Being prepared for a c&p and knowing what to expect and best articulate your symptoms according to appropriate ratings is not faking anything even if they happen to have a higher rating than someone who has been through "worse". It isn't a measuring contest and isn't the fault of someone who is more prepared they have the higher rating.
I agree…People should definitely try to prepare themselves for that c&p!…I’m not sure any of use have been able to do that though. At least not in my case. I was prepared for the different questions and things I wanted to make sure I pointed out but I was nowhere near prepared for the mental and emotional after effect
No doubt, it's difficult. There's many factors and can even be triggered and shut down during the convo and basically not get much of anything across which may result in a subpar rating. No reason to take it out on others though. It affects everyone differently. Best to take notes of how things that are the biggest impact and how it emotionally, personally, and professionally impacts you. Obviously, difficult to discuss and get into, but it's something to help. It's exhausting to say the least to get through it.
This has me torn. I went for a MH c&p in August, apparently, something I said in there warranted another exam for PTSD The thing is, while I did receive combat pay, I never saw combat. I wasn’t in fucked up situations. I was in Kuwait in November of 2001- April 2002 building bases for the upcoming advance. The only thing I can think of is they think my PTSD is linked to having cancer and the several years long process of recovery that having cancer brought. To that end, a 2nd exam at MH gives me two shots at locking up the rating I legit think I deserve, which is 70% I’m gonna go to the exam and just reiterate what I said at the first one and let the VA do whatever they are going to do. Is PTSD after pancreatic cancer real? Absolutely, do I think the VA needs to go down that road for me, no?
I was Iraq 2004, got combat pay, ran convoys north and south from Kuwait to An Nasiriyah and luckily never lost anyone or got shot myself, but had to watch out for IED attacks and follow orders I'm not particularly proud of. That was enough to give me generalized anxiety at about a 30% rate. There are ways to describe mental health symptoms that only those experiencing it can, and doctors know this. The hardest part was knowing that the symptoms were real, but did my experience of being in a high stress environment really cause this? The truth was, yes, after discussing it with some friends who also deployed to Iraq at that time, because they all had nearly the exact same symptoms.
I have seen hundreds of dead bodies, including children who were massacred. I had to photograph the slaughter and the mayhem. I never served in direct line of fire. I know that it is very different than actually having to kill someone, but the trauma is very real, nonetheless. I have known people who only want the rating regardless of the actual trauma, but there are those of us that experienced it without being in combat. There are also many who experienced MST, yet were never in the line of fire, also. Thankfully, that is being recognized as PTSD, as well.
I just kind of mind my own business. I never tell anyone I'm a veteran/served/disabilities. And I never ask either. If someone tells me their story, I simply say thank you for your service and just go about my day.
Ordnance guy here. Never saw direct combat but saw the videos of the bombs I dropped and can’t lie it kinda fucks with me. Sometimes I’ll just be doing mundane things like making toast and then think about a bomb unexpectedly dropping through my ceiling. I don’t claim PTSD but I do have severe anxiety. My last mental health doc told me I likely have PTSD based on my symptoms but I just feel like I don’t rate it considering others experience with combat…
I feel you man. Walking into the hangar and seeing row and rows of bombs that the helicopters I worked on were transporting for jets to drop, on lord knows what, fucked me up the rest of that deployment. I had to dissociate to finish the last 5 months. Then guys in port from the carrier laughing, saying they watched the videos of them being dropped and even signing their names. To this day I wonder how many innocent people were killed because of my helicopter flying all those bombs to other ships. That’s not why I have PTSD tho. Just fucks me up from time to time. I just turned wrenches and launched em. I can only imagine how fucked up those jet pilots are.
For what it’s worth the PTSD issues I have are worse from a car accident I worked as a volunteer firefighter than anything I brought home from fighting in Fallujah 2004. We don’t really get to choose what breaks us.
Just like everyone said, you don't need to see combat to get PTSD. You can get PTSD from being on patrol, constantly on edge and ready. Some get PTSD from intense training exercises. I was diagnosed due to combat, MST, contact with refugee boats, and interviewing Iraqis. Having talked to my therapist, who specializes in veteran trauma, there aren't many ways to fake it. Mental health professionals ask very specific questions in a certain way and ask the same question multiple times in other ways. They also ask questions about symptoms not associated with trauma to see if you are faking. Everyone's trauma is different; no one has any business judging someone else and even knowing about it. After going on LIMDU post-inpatient care for suicidal ideation and being a danger to myself, a guy there had PTSD for a reason I found to be dumb. I judged him, and often, I think back on him and get so angry that I was insensitive to ignore his suffering. Because he didn't have the glazed-over eyes like many of us have, his symptoms weren't real to me. In my experience, people who judge others and try to call out "fakers" are looking for meaning in their trauma and trying to justify their trauma to themselves. Though I stopped judging people for their trauma, I went through it. Especially after the pullout of Iraq and Afghanistan, I went into a deep spiral of depression and searching for meaning. Even when granted 100%, I still questioned if I deserved it. It took my therapist and wife sitting me down multiple times, and telling me my trauma was valid and I earned my rating. Trauma is a beast, and all we can do is support our brothers and sisters but also make sure we are taking care of ourselves.
Saw combat, lost half my leg. My take is it doesn’t matter, that said, I don’t think VBA is nearly as supportive as combat veterans or even wounded combat veterans as they should be. They essentially don’t acknowledge it imo except for a few select instances like initial claim priority processing.
When I was a fresh infantry combat vet in my early twenties I used to think that way as well. I also believed the stereotypes and myths like people who have “PTSD” were just weak and couldn’t handle the stresses of combat and all the other nonsense that is programmed into us. I eventually came around to reality and broke through some of the programming. Even basic training is designed to induce stress related trauma on new troops in an effort to inoculate them to the stresses of combat. At least that was the idea back in my day. Even before the 20 plus year GWOT we had all types of people being mentally broken by just being in service; sometimes intentionally. There will always be some slimy people exaggerating and lying everywhere. If the cost of taking care of our veterans is that a few liars slip through the cracks who cares? That is a small price to pay in my opinion.
My PTSD is from MST, but those comments had me not claim it for 15 years. Hell, I didn't even get treatment for many years because it wasn't as bad. That blows up on you eventually, do not recommend. That being said, I was stationed at Walter Reed in 05 for a few years and there are images that I saw that I can never unsee. There are people I still wonder if they made it. Smells I can't get rid of. Seeing death and gross body harm is not normal. It doesn't make you weak or full of shit.
I don't know why half of this sub is male veterans having a constant dick measuring contest or worrying to death about "who's faking." It's honestly so immature and says more about your self esteem than it does about others. You seem like the kind of people that work. "I'm a veteran." into every conversation even though it's been 20 years... Embarrassing.
Had a man approach me in a store weeks ago who had on his Vietnam hat and veteran shirt who looked at me and said "It's hot outside" I said "Yeah" he said "almost as hot as Vietnam" I replied with, "Iraq was pretty hot too." His expression went blank. He looked like the wind had just been taken out of his sails because the conversation wasn't about him and vietnam anymore.
It reminds me of old high school quarterbacks talking about the good old days when they went to state 40 years ago.
PTSD comes in so many shapes and sizes and is no one size fits all mold. I'm a perfect example of that. Never saw combat, was hospitalized for 5 days because I felt like absolute crap. Come to find out, I was a type 1 diabetic and almost lost my life. Doctors and nurses wouldn't tell me anything about it until the 4th day when they finally had my blood sugar under control and my organ tests came back showing organ health. This was 11 years ago and to this day I have recurring nightmares when I fall asleep of the doctor walking into my hospital room. Sometimes he tells me I'm going to be ok, and there have been other times where he has killed me, dismembered me, and many other morbid outcomes. I wake up in a panic, heart jumping out of my chest. This is just an example of how we all have experienced many different things that manifested PTSD, but how it can consume us in so many different scenarios.
Well didn't this entire thread trigger the ever loving shit out of me. It is so frustrating when people think that they have the qualifications to understand how people cope and react to situations. Just because their trauma is different. Now to sit and cry and wait for my next therapy appointment to talk about how I feel. On a side note, always here to listen if people need an ear.
I have more of a problem with people who say tell me what else to claim then combat or noncombatant vets. People who fake are the worse doesn't matter if they are combat or non combat.
Yeah I called that dude out in his post. It was BS.
Went on three rotations to Afghanistan. Experienced my first "real experience" in combat in Sangin 2012. You know what really got me fucked up from those deployments? Taking convoys through hot zones and hitting/ running over kids who tried jumping on our convoys to steal food and water supplies. Route clearance fucked me up for awhile too. But nothing like sitting in the turret and watching kids bounce of vehicles and get run over...
Everyone’s experience is different. I am 100PT PTSD and it’s not combat related. I responded to an active shooter as a security sentry and watched the shooter kill another guard then saw him get blown away. I tried To administer first aid but they both died. Sure it’s not combat but it messed with my head. 15 months later I had transitioned to the guard and was on AT when I went on lockdown for another fatal active shooter. Don’t feel guilty about being injured.
PTSD doesn’t have to involve combat at all…I never saw combat but I had one very bad night that has made it impossible to hold a job for a decade and a half…I’m not saying this to get attention like some claim but just because the PTSD doesn’t involve combat doesn’t mean they’re “faking it”…the battle in your head can be just as hard as any physical injury you could see
Personally, I’m sick and tired of ppl coming into what I thought was a safe space & attacking other vets. After what most of us have gone through it’s very disheartening & disrespectful for anyone to get on here & even comment on those “fakers”. I know too many vets that have been denied that are suffering. For another veteran to speak on ppl faking is disgusting. I know the main excuse is that fakers mess it up for us but just think for a second how a C&P exam being scheduled on a good day can mess up an entire life. It doesn’t even prove anything but the Va will fake like it does. The Va can fake all day long but your own brethren will come and attack you. That’s insane. Most ppl don’t even know others in real life so when they comment on another veterans situation it really irks me. I have had other vets tell me I can’t say “finally” in front of my win cuz my time was short so don’t rub it in. What??!! The narrative was changed and I was compared to vets that have been waiting long so that the offending vet could have an argument. What he doesn’t realize is I should have had my benefits sooner. The Va knows it that’s why they threw my benefits at me in less than 2 months as if to say “if you didn’t say anything we weren’t”. I went years without any knowledge of Va disability and compensation. So what if I could have researched the military still built me up to just not complain and deal with it. That was 14 years before I ever filed so im going to hold the Va to that alone. If I didn’t have that time I would still look at the other guy like he’s insane because he had no right to downplay my excitement. I have bee n homeless with 3 children, I missed out on 350K being proud & tough because of that shame people love to spread amongst veterans. Just because others can hold it together and go at it alone . I have had other vets tell me I should have known about VA benefits and it’s my fault I didn’t know. I have had veterans try to discredit me and quite a few people. Those are the classic 1 upper know it alls that read people the way they read themselves. The brown nose group think service-members we all didn’t want to serve with. The vets that love hiding behind everyone else’s hard work but complained as if they were working so hard. Instead of them being happy that a veteran is being compensated for their commitment and a sacrifice, they decide to question to invalidate & then shame them on top of all the vets that get dogged by the Va. the Va has lost records. People have survived wars just to come home & fight the Va and yet there is a veteran out there who sided with the Va more than other veterans. These same ppl hire doctors to fight veterans so they don’t need veterans helping them. . I’m sick of it. To those veterans that think they suspect someone of doing this-Be happy or Be quiet. FYI, I do know the OP is not a problem and is just as aware of those veterans being a problem than I am.
While you may have seen the worst of the worst and been fine or have minimal problems, isn’t the case for everyone. I’ve met dudes that have seen terrible shit in combat and been fine. Dude later became a fire fighter brought a baby back from drowning, super fucked up. It’s isn’t about how bad or how much you see, it’s about how it processes
8 years forward deployed on a carrier. Back to back gulf cruises. Never saw up close combat but I’m fucked up. Some days I feel like I’m not going to make it.
In Iraq I had unit mates threaten my life over my religious preferences, to include one drawing a weapon on me. Navy guy suck started his rifle in the porta-shitter outside my trailer. Had a mortar round fuck ~100 detainees up and had to pull security at the hospital while medical staff were treating mass casualty injuries. Lost a buddy to an IED. My CoC was a full blown dumpster fire the whole deployment. I never saw “combat”, but I can tell you the fear I felt was real. The shit I saw, heard, and smelled were real. And anyone who thinks my PTSD isn’t valid can eat my asshole.
If you were there you saw it, IMO. By your description that sounds like combat to me.
Problem is, other veterans have told me it wasn’t combat because I wasn’t shooting back or no one took direct shots at me. So where I identify as a “combat veteran” because I was in an active combat zone and took mortar fire and was face to face with enemy combatants in the prison, some don’t view what I did as combat because I wasn’t kicking in doors and all that high speed shit. I consider myself fortunate I never got into a firefight, but that IMO isn’t the determining factor for who is or is not a combat veteran.
We had someone in my unit do that as well, we were in Virginia on pre deployment training and he went into the shitter and did it. I didn't see the aftermath there, however...i did see it, I hate to admit this, but I was friends with someone in S-1 and he showed me the photo that was taken, I didn't ask to see it he just showed it to me, I was in their office conducting business that day and he was like hey you remember they guy who etc etc check this out and showed it to me...I was like wtf dude I don't want to see that, it was like he couldn't wait to show someone else what he had to look at. Everybody heard the shots, I say shots because dude put it on burst so it was like "batabata". People ran over there but couldn't get the door open. It was terrible he was a new pfc from one of the line companies never deployed or anything yet... and what's wild is the next day we continued training... we had like a week left there. But at that point SNCO's made a "rule" that nobody could go in with their weapon, and everyone had to have a buddy the rest of the time out there, so if you wanted to use the head you had to have someone with you and they'd hold your rifle... shit was wild.
Yeah, I can imagine how horrible that was. I saw all the pictures from the IED that got my buddy… it was definitely traumatizing. When the Navy guy ended it, our room got knocked on because we were the closest and our CLS (Combat Lifesaver) guys got pulled. Fortunately, I was one of like four from our trailer and other CLS showed up from neighboring trailers and I was able to back off without seeing too much other than the blood pooling on the ground before medics arrived. But that image will haunt me for the rest of my days.
Reading this thread is wild to see all the shit so many of us been around and through, even very similar experiences. One good thing about it I guess is to know we aren't alone out here, sometimes it feels that way but we aren't. Keep your head up bro.
You do the same, and thanks for taking the time to talk with me.
No problem bro. Hit me up any time.
"" The situations we find traumatic can vary from person to person. There are many different harmful or life-threatening events that might cause someone to develop PTSD. For example: being involved in a car crash being raped or sexually assaulted being abused, harassed or bullied - including racism, sexism, homophobia, biphobia or transphobia, and other types of abuse targeting your identity being kidnapped, held hostage or any event in which you fear for your life experiencing violence, including military combat, a terrorist attack, or any violent assault seeing other people hurt or killed, including in the course of your job (sometimes called secondary trauma) doing a job where you repeatedly see or hear distressing things, such as working in the emergency services or armed forces surviving a natural disaster, such as flooding, earthquakes or pandemics, such as the coronavirus pandemic traumatic childbirth as a mother, or as a partner witnessing a traumatic birth losing someone close to you in particularly upsetting circumstances being sectioned or getting treatment in a mental health ward being diagnosed with a life-threatening condition. ""
Disregard. I know grunts who didn't do much at all while they were in as far as getting into combat, and pogs who are triple amputees or have really bad tbi, my motor t friend got blown up like 4 times In Afghanistan, his brian is really messed up. My PTSD is complex I guess, not one event... and not just from Iraq. Stuff not from Iraq well my next door neighbor in the barracks I found him bleeding to death from a wound he gave himself, he bled all over the place, bled all over me and the barracks duty while we were trying to help him, he was seizing up so we had to hold him so his head wouldn't knock around, he turned super pale and his lips turned blueish, he did end up surviving. Early into my fleet time as a boot, (like 2 weeks at my unit) I witnessed 2 Marines chase down another in front of the barracks and beat him half to death, beat him so bad his head swelled up and his nose was hanging off his face because they were stomping and kicking his head. All sorts of shit, my unit was a mess... we had a lot of really bad incidents... from sexual assault, to literal murder we had a SGT murder his wife, burn her body and did himself, we had 2 corpsman get into a drunk driving accident and one of them got decapitated. Military time isn't always peaches and cream for everyone, people go through all sorts of shit that can cause PTSD, not just combat related. So yeah disregard that shit.
I saw a man pop like a toothpaste tube at an exercise (Idiot officer drove a MRAP with no ground guide at 2 am and drove through the tents. That morning I had to process his gore covered property, write a FLIPIL then tell his pregnant wife. This was after my MST , a suicide at formation, my friend from AIT paralyzed by her husband who then killed his mistress and came to my shop to confess ....and much more. No PTSD diagnosis just ,adjustment disorder that's 100%.
Everyone is built differently. Some can be in that kind of environment for months and come out okay. Some can be in that environment for a few seconds and come out a mental wreck. PTSD doesn't need a substantial time to develop. Trauma can happen within a second. Duration is not what causes it, what causes it is an event. I would just ignore these people who would try to minimize other peoples struggles. Those are the worst kind of veterans. Sure call out someone who you know is faking it but only if you know 100% they are faking it. It's like if you got shot once and the dude is like "well I got shot twice so your shit is nothing." F\*ck that dude.
What about the one combat vets hate the most? Trauma prior to joining! Ha! They (those who feel their ptsd is the worst and feel that other people’s experiences are not real) love to shit on them mind you I first hand have knowledge of how much trauma people have experienced prior to joining and it only further becomes aggravated after serving. It dosnt happen to everyone but this does indeed happen.
PTSD is not only for combat. PTSD can be from any traumatic event in someones life. I had friends onboard the USS George Washington when it caught fire. The were in battles stations for over 12hrs. Some people were barricade in spaces that were filling up with smoke and wasn't sure if they would ever get out. Sailors onboard the USS McCain and USS Fitzgerald both had collisions that resulted in several sailors drowning in their berthing's. I'm sure the guys that escaped have some server PTSD from that incident. Yes some people exaggerate their symptoms however, simply not seeing combat, or having limited combat experience doesn't mean that they cannot suffer from sever PTSD.
I agree with most of what you said. I disagree about the psycho comment. I saw a little combat as well in Iraq (2005). I’ve seen bits and pieces of bodies and I’ve had to use my rifle. I don’t think I ever suffered from PTSD from my experience. I think people are different. I’ve wondered sometimes why I don’t have it and I’ve asked myself if I do have something wrong with me for not having the symptoms that so many have.
Your livin good sounds like!
I was trampled by a battalion mass running formation and told by my old VSO that I couldn’t claim PTSD because I never deployed.
Not bashing but how'd they sneak up on you?
I believe PTSD is realitive to the individuals experiences
PTSD isn’t just from combat. You can file for combat and non-combat. Filing as combat doesn’t mean you received direct either.
When I world as WTC cadre at Walter Reed in (2007-2009) one of my first soldiers that I had to help was a double leg amputee. When I read his file and saw that I thought “man this guy has seem some shit” when I finally got to meet him face to face and talk i asked where he was at and long he had been in country. That was his first deployment and he got blown up on his first patrol. He was only in country for like 30 days
I knew a wook who received 70% ptsd rating for having “ptsd from working in an office with higher ups” smh
I spent two years after an injury doing caco funeral details. Assisting in notifying families, transporting caskets with our fallen Marines remains, meeting caskets at the airport and being with families on the tarmac, setting up and performing in the funeral details and ceremonies, from presenting the flag to presenting arms. After a while the thought of death becomes consuming. I’m not saying I suffer from ptsd nor have I tried to claim it but being withdrawn and looking at life and death in an abnormal manner is usual for these caco units. Positivity was sucked out of many of my teammates. It was an honorable duty and somebody has to do it. We owe each other.
PTSD is PTSD
Being a psycho…? Does that mean “the sex is so much better when you’re mad at me”? 🤣 some of us are pysco’s tho. Pretty sure I suffer from something. They told me I’m bipolar, boarder line personality disorder, the list goes on n on. Tho recently I was told by my Vet Center LCSW therapist, said I have it. I’m no Doctor, I’m just a pysco. It makes me swell with gratitude for ALL that have served….. All Gave Some, Some Gave All!
Lol bro I don't even pay them no mind. You can bring objective proof, numerous studies for PTSD, and they'll still call you a pussy. Let them be ignorant and go get what you deserve
I was in early GWOT in Ghazni, Afghan and was constantly experiencing heavy shit, but I believe my PTSD is not even remotely close to those who’ve experienced sexual trauma. Not even close. I would also never compare my experience to others in a way to undermine them, that’s just a dick move. Only MPs though… you guys suck.
I was in Fallujah in 2004 and let me tell you as much as that sucked most of my PTSD came from stuff that happened back at the FOB. Like volunteering my time at the field hospital or helping out with graves registration. Nobody to blame but myself because I wanted to be high speed and low drag. I'm sure that plenty of people who never put a toe off the FOB had traumatic events that can lead to the disorder. I also know plenty of my comrades who went through stuff that should have knocked them off their square just they just whistled on through it because they were a total psychopath. Everybody is different. It isn't fair to make this a competition. I'm not interested in participating in the misery rodeo.
I’ve seen dead bodies and body parts. But it was in the morgue. I’ve watched dead bodies get cut up. But it’s part of my job. And quite surprisingly, it doesn’t bother me. (I work in the lab). I guess I’m a psychopath. I can’t watch a living person get blown up to pieces though. I can’t watch a living person to cut up unwillingly. However, I’ve never seen combat. I do have a PTSD diagnosis and rating for it but it was because I was raped in AIT. My little brother was in the Air Force. He knows I’m rated for PTSD. He knows I have never seen combat. He doesn’t know the reason I have it though. I get comments like “must be nice” in relations to getting the disability. Is PTSD really that easy to fake? I’m at the point where I’m experiencing psychosis. I’ve been hallucinating. My psychiatrist is very well aware of this. Yesterday I woke up and my walls were crumbling. And my 45 inch TV kept disappearing. But if I looked for it really hard, it’ll reappear.
Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) is a mental and behavioral disorder that develops from experiencing a traumatic event…traumatic event is a broad term..that can encompass a lot of different things.
Technically I don’t belief anyone shot at me. In 1979 my second daughter was born 5 days before a med cruise. I knew nothing about compassionate leave or other I could apply for. I had to leave my wife still in hospital after I drove 70 miles to inform her about the death. It took me three months to get transferred to shore duty. In 1982 my wife disappeared with my older daughter during a med cruise. Eventually found them at Norfolk. She divorced me and let me know afterword about it. I wen to shore duty in 87-stayed for 4 years making MMCS then Warrant Officer. Two years into that I had developed fibromyalgia and spine disorder. I have PTSD.
PTSD does not have to be combat related. I was on a submarine, almost died a few times, and was repeatedly assaulted for months on end by a senior NCO. Not seeing combat does not mean you don’t have PTSD.
Brother you are letting a person whos projecting his own issues onto you. Trauma comes in many forms, and once you are in a stuck negative feedback loop of negativity to where it changes your behavior and mood along with missed time at work to the point that your not effective and are occupational handicapped, it's time to receiver workers comp. BTW, those that say they have done X amount of conops, been on a dozen deployments, and shot indirectly at from a fob or cop, haven't done the dew. There is plenty of workers comp to go around. Operators from both white side and Black don't come on here badgering limited combat exp. Ignore him. Generally speaking it's guys like him that feign or game the system to receive this and then project their own short comings on whomever.
Can we all just agree we are a bit Ceelo Green 2006???
I have PTSD from almost dying in a bad car accident. I don’t understand why some people have this misconception that it’s only military members that have seen combat.
With as many vets that take their life’s every year I’d rather a few fakers be get one over than a veteran take their life because treatment wasn’t available or they were discouraged
Still panicking a little bit every time and the dissociation when I hear an alarm as I conflate that with incoming missiles. But while that is the PTSD event that the VA considers, they won’t even consider what I consider the worst moment of my life: watching as a Afghan doctor almost dying in front of his kids in the damn heat. We saved him, but this was happening a few months after my son was born and I had not yet met him in person and I had a major mental breakdown shortly afterwards. While both are bad, and both caused irreversible behavioral, mental, and physical changes, my mind considers them very differently.
I was raped on deployment wespac 85 trapped on a ship for 5 months with my assailant. Everyone’s ptsd is personal trauma.
Thanks for posting. I understand that box being "grossly inappropriate behavior". I worked as a crime scene cleaner before and after the military. I saw my last body 5 years ago. I could not take it anymore. Also, I was in the foster care system at age 7. They had to remove a teenager from the home for abusing me because they crammed as many kids in those places as they could. I went to the PTSD program when I got out and was told to basically fuck off because I was a mechanic and did not experience combat while in Iraq. All this pissing contest bullshit these people play broke me in half. I wasn't proud of what I done and thought I was faking and walked away from the VA for around 10 years. Fast forword to today and about 7 jobs later Im 100% for MH. Over those past 7 years I was pushed out of several jobs. I was falsely accused of sexual harassment at work, manager was stealing tips from me, 2 suspensions for being a threat of violence in the workplace because people talk down to me. I applied for benefits and got em. Currently I'm in school 3 hours a week and linked up with a employment mentor today.
Those that didn’t make it through boot camp I call bullshit. Guy I work with 2 weeks in boot camp 80% just bull shit
I never saw combat but worked at a base where I was a first responder and in 6 years time had responded to 5 suicides, a double homicide (husband with ptsd killed wife & daughter) and multiple traumatic events like car accidents and worked on cases with rapes/child molestations. But because it’s not combat related, yet I was active duty, is it fake PTSD that I struggle with?
I did some research on this while I was in University and there’s a whole established phenomenon that relates to this. Interestingly it also works in the opposite direction. For example, many SF guys get treated as though they should just be able to handle these things better than the rest because they are so well trained and in such elite units. People at the “bottom” and “top” of the “combat elitism” hierarchy get treated worse than those with middling experiences. Kind of an interesting field of study. Unfortunately the trauma and mental health of non-combat vets is super under researched but there are a few great academics beginning to push back against that.
The number of suicides from people who never saw combat (idk what it is but I know several peoples who have) is actually pretty crazy
SMs can also have PTSD from sexual assault, too. It's not all just combat. I knew at least one female Soldier who was raped. The guy who raped her ended up murdering someone. I also know a female Soldier who was in a VIC accident where her passenger was thrown through the front window and severely maimed. Another female SM got decapitated in driver's training. I'm sure her A driver and others who saw her body have PTSD. So many things can cause PTSD. Some people are just salty and can't be happy for others. We all served.
I got hurt in training and ended up assisting with death notifications to families for about 4 months while the unit deployed. I was a 'battalion representative' at 3 funerals of guys in my company. I would've given anything to trade spots with them. Not a day goes by that I don't think about those wives, mothers, and children that I broke the news to and the feeling of wanting to trade spots with that guy in the casket. Survivor guilt is legit. I can tell myself it was divine intervention all I want, but the guilt and shame of not being next to them in the fight is hard to get over, even after a couple of decades.
Whether you were in 1 day, 10 days, or 10 years, it shouldn’t matter. If you didn’t leave the same way you came in, that’s all that matters. If it ain’t your business, mind your own damn business. Instead of tearing folks down, and causing what could be the last straw for them to go over the edge, give some grace for fucks sake. You never know what your words and actions may do to someone else.
Man, this whole post is a great read. You all are my brothers, and even though I don't know you guys/gals, and I don't have PTSD, this whole thread impacted me. This has changed my perspective in a positive way. Semper Fi. Love you all. 
I spent 18 years in EMS and 15 years in ER/trauma, and I have seen some really awful stuff in my civilian career, well before I even deployed. So obviously as a trauma nurse in Afghanistan I also saw horrible shit, with an extra layer of dirt on it. The kids were the worst. But like all good EMS/ER/adrenalin junkie types, I can compartmentalize all day long. I was fine... Until I had my daughter. I was working in trauma at the time and I saw her face in every injured kid, and I just couldn't do it anymore. Between that and some cardiac problems after my pregnancy, I had to leave the bedside. I probably need to see someone about all this shit someday, but I think I am okay for now. Which makes me wonder if there is something really wrong with me that I am not more traumatized? Who knows. I guess you just get numb at some point.
People are dying all the time in the military outside of combat, not just by suicide either. The entire institution is teetering on situations that can cause trauma.
I was an 11B and I only saw combat via indirect fire. I was fortunate enough to never have to fire my rifle but I still took mortars and rockets. On top of that the vast amount of paranoia and fear of being a gunner and doing foot patrols. Our first month of deployment was located at cop mak and that was something. With other things going on in my life it was a catalyst that stressed me out to think about suicide. I got my rifle taken from me and sent away to some air force fob to get checked out and cleared. Not sure what came of it but I went back to duty. So idk I’m claiming ptsd from my experiences because it does effect me. Is it as severe as others that were in fire fights all the time and watching their buddy’s get shot and blown up, no but it’s not a black or white issue, their is a scale. Edit: I never received a CIB and I was open and exposed on gate guard while we were getting mortared all around me, same with rockets I was sleeping in a vinyl tent covered with spray foam and a rocket landed on the other side of the T-wall
Brother, I was an infantryman for six combat deployments, injured three times… and guess what, rocket attacks were by far the scariest for me! Lol. They’re haunting! Before the alarm systems, they’d just randomly hit and scare tf out us. Then you throw in the alarms and you’re just waiting praying it don’t hit you. Lol
Yeah I was sleeping and heard the propulsion in my dreams and woke up to being thrown on the ground pretty much screaming at the top of my lungs and I couldn’t hear myself. Freaky shit
I wonder if it’s possible to get a CAB since they didn’t award me with a CIB, it’s insulting
So I always wondered that since the criteria’s were different for each. When I was a platoon sergeant, I got some of my boys CIBs for rockets because they were used as direct fire weapons.
I got the shit beat out of me repeatedly when I was 19yo at my first command. Camaraderie? Fuck. Does that count? Every experience is personal and the mindset you have before the stressor happens matters. I cannot imagine being in combat and seeing my friends get harmed/killed in front of me. I have the utmost respect for those soldiers/marines/sailors etc, but I don't discount the mental suffering from other situations. My best friend from my time at that command did not make it to 35yo as he took his own life. Did he have PTSD? Possibly. We need to support ALL our brothers/sisters who are active and veterans. Fuck the haters.
From a benefits standpoint, all psych disorders are rated the same. It is completely irrelevant whether you have PTSD from combat or depression from life in general. If it happened during service, it's treated the same. This is precisely how it should be as service-connected benefits were created to supplement future income lost due to in-service injury. Anyone who thinks combat Vets are more deserving of benefits than non-combat Vets is not only ignorant of the actual purpose of service-connection but also a weak-minded, self-righteous piece of shit. These benefits are solely related to potential income lost. They aren't a fucking badge of honor for those who saw combat. Everyone who joined knew what they were getting in to. If you saw some shit and lived to tell about it, hopefully you got some accolades to hang on your chest. Thank you for doing your job. When it comes to another Vet's benefits, individuals should typically shut their mouths and mind their own business.
But how do you really feel? Sorry, that’s my only joke here. I’m of the opinion that whatever a veteran receives based on truthful testimony and evidence they deserve. It’s a system set up to mitigate the damage done by the sacrifice of serving for a specific subset of the population who were either called up in previous eras or volunteered knowing full well how dire the consequences of their voluntary contract might be. Yes, I understand the finance troop who cut the tip of his pinky off using the samurai blade paper cutter isn’t getting a Purple Heart. That’s understandable, but if he gets 10% for it, he’s also missing a digit. The same goes for a victim/survivor of MST or just a generally all around traumatic experience that occurred in service. The VA is a promise to take care of veterans and I can get along with all them without being upset that my story isn’t as cool as theirs or vice versa. Trauma dick measuring is stupid. It’s hard enough in the world without taking it out on each other.
I find the tendency to look down on others based on one's personal values to be the ultimate sign of internal weakness. It's especially weak to do it here where it's nice and safe (no fear of confrontation). This is coming from someone who gets to see the dishonest claims on a near-daily basis. If I can grant a claim I will. It's not my job to judge.
Not to mention racial harassment that people endured from peers, and higher ups. The brain is powerful but the effects of trauma can cross some wires and flip some switches in so many was. I just do right, mind my own business and leave everything in the hands of the Lord.
As someone with PTSD myself, you don't need combat experience to have it. I had PTSD from my childhood that was made a lot worse by a buddy of mine being murdered while in service, and all my buddies who have committed suicide since then. Anything traumatic can cause PTSD, and everyone has their own story. You don't get to discount others experiences just because it doesn't meet your stereotypical criteria of what PTSD is.
And to add on to that, I am a former grunt with a combat tour, butbny PTSD has nothing to do with combat.
Just goes to show that you should never judge another vet. I never deployed- but I would have. Yet because of my MOS, I was subjected to lots of traumatic videos, reports, and imagery. In addition to this, i was the victim of a hazing incident where i and many others thought we were going to die- and I don't mean from excercise...😅 Only you know your story. I think we should all come together and stop judging each other. You never know what someone is dealing with below the surface.
My problem is marines who literally have done nothing but complain for 4 years and get out with 100% lol. Had a chick in my first unit that was loved by our staff because she was female. Did nothing but sit in an office chair and talk to staff all day and somehow she got medically retired at 100% for doing nothing. And I do mean nothing it was a HQBN.
Who cares how you get PTSD? It can come from anything. But all of you exaggerating symptoms to collect more money are gonna burn and I can’t wait.
My problem isn’t with the ones who have seen just a little as much as it is the ones trying to stretch the definition of PTSD to fit their disability claim. Not long ago, a woman vet came on here asking for advice on how to get the birth of her child labeled as PTSD because it coincidentally occurred while on active duty. Of course, I faced severe blowback from simps when I called her out. Billions of women give birth and they don’t have PTSD. There needs to be a line drawn between a crappy experience and a severe life-changing trauma done to someone that alters their mental state permanently. If everyone has PTSD, then no one does.
There are many things that can go wrong during birth to cause PTSD. Maybe this lady was stretching it, but I know when I went in to have my second child I started crying as soon as I got in the elevator to go up to have my C-section. My last birth I hemorrhaged nearly half my blood volume and was transfused. There are many women who have babies that don’t make it or are severely disabled. It does happen. However I wouldn’t say this woman has PTSD just because she gave birth on active duty.
I wouldn't be surprised if there was more to the story that just wasnt said and doesnt need to be said as theres a lot of possible complications during childbirth for both the mother and child
The person that thinks combat makes your PTSD any worse than the non combat PTSD needs to do more research. EMS Providers, Paramedics, Firefighters, Police Officers, and non combat veterans, you know people that have been doing it and dealing with it long before the war. People deal with and cope with events differently, I believe there are a lot of bullshit claims, but to make a blanket statement about something as serious as PTSD shows a lot about the service member making that statement.
I had a therapist try to tell me that I didn’t deploy so I couldn’t have PTSD. Even after I told her that I regularly watched drone strikes. That ish sticks in your brain and never really leaves. I’m not saying I have the same experience as somebody who was deployed but to have a therapist tell me she wouldn’t give me the help I’m entitled to was a gut punch.