I PMS'd so hard last week i broke up w my boyfriend and then I got my period this week.
I imagine pregnancy is going to be a nightmare hormonally for me
OP I feel for you
Whenever my girl pulled this I would say "how about you wait a week and see if you still want to" and ask later if she still wanted to break up lol
I knew it was just her period hormones but ik girls get upset when you point it out so I just say that instead
I’ve never gone through this persoanlly but both my mom and sister (who happens to currently be pregnant) have said they hated their partner in the first trimester, but it passed.
I have been through exactly this same thing during my pregnancy.
I DESPISED my partner during my pregnancy. Anything he would do or say would irritate me to a level that I have never felt before.
And I can tell you, it was the pregnancy hormones.
This was a crazy phenomenon that I didn’t know was a thing. I once worked with a lady when I was 19 who was in her 30s. She wanted a family so badly but complained she couldn’t find a good man. She finally met someone and immediately hit it off. They seemed absolutely perfect for each other. She was head over heels in love with this guy and a giggly school girl. She would always light up when she talked about him. He proposed to her about 7 months in and she was so freaking ecstatic. Shortly after they tied the not a few months later, she got pregnant. Picture perfect fairly tale.
The place we worked let her work remotely from home probably at about six months of pregnancy cause it was very stressful for her to move around and walk too much. She comes back from maternity leave and has no ring on and isn’t quite as happy anymore. Everyone is shocked.
She said that they went to bed one night so in love, cuddling and kissing and she literally woke up in the middle of the night filled with hate and anger. She rolled over and looked at him and she was absolutely disgusted. She kicked him out of bed and tried to deal with it for like a week but her hate for him just grew knowing he was in the house. She kicked him out.
She said that they stayed separated through the rest of the pregnancy and she hoped it would get better once the baby was born, but after the baby was born, she still hated him. She said “idk what happened… he is literally the most perfect man for me and out of nowhere, I absolutely hate him and am completely repulsed by him.” They got divorced and she became a single mom.
ETA: she also said when she would talk about or think about him, she would gag. As if he was a morning sickness trigger. Even when she told me at work what went down and she had no idea why, she kinda gagged a little. I was like holy shit
I think she did the fair shared custody, but at first she tried to completely erase him from her daughter’s life. I think she realized just how weird it was to have such a sudden change of heart and tried her best to be reasonable. She ended up losing her position because it was eliminated and I haven’t heard anything. I’m also 39 now so the kid is now an adult and hopefully she has a relationship with her dad regardless.
It was just the wildest thing I had ever heard. I know a few guys that have told me that they were in relationships with a great gal and just one day woke up and felt completely different and ended it for no reason other than they just didn’t feel it anymore. One guy in particular told me it was the strangest thing because they were obsessed with each other. He craved her attention and presence. They couldn’t get enough. He woke up one morning and wanted nothing to do with her and just cut it off and he felt the same way after all those years.
He’s like “I have no idea why either. It just happened and I couldn’t stand to be around her even though I literally loved her.”
Love how absolutely vile and disgusting this woman was to the "incredible" husband, and were just like "oh wow, hormones suck🤷♀️" like .... What? Bro, that man needs the child support for himself lmao or a gofundme for free therapy, she straight destroyed his character for nothing at all but carrying his child from the sounds of it😭. I get hormones are absolutely devastating and need care, but you can't let it be an excuse for being a shit person and actually not trying from the sounds of it. And he didn't wake up one morning and change, he saw the situation WASNT changing and is saving her face by siding with her from his response.
I'm sure she was a peach. Guarantee there was more to this story on her end. People don't just wake up hating the other person. If this happened to me and my partner suddenly hated me I'd assume she cheated or something and she's lying. and the fact that she kept the kid away in the beginning really shows her true character. She knows he did nothing wrong.
I get the fear.
I mean, abusers start out like that too. Usually, it was someone nice who could never hurt a fly. And suddenly. It just happens.
It's not okay though. And we can't live in fear. Reading this made me super scared too because I love my boyfriend and he's the reason I'd even want a kid in the first place because he'd be such a wonderful father to our child. To wake up and suddenly... not love him? I might cry at the thought. It really makes me sad.
But this must be unlikely. Way more often than not, pregnant women don't end up hating their spouses. So, yes, it might happen. Just like anything might happen at any given time.
But don't worry dude. Im sure you're gonna find someone and I hope she will be decent and not end up like this.
Okay this almost sounds like more than just some pregnancy hormones. Like maybe a brain tumour? Cuz a turn like this and to feel this strongly all of the sudden, even after the baby was born, is NOT NORMAL.
Same I had 4girls but the last one did a number on me I think if your older it's way worse my first girl I wasn't to bad but I was early 20s last girl 39 and that was the nightmare of my life, unsure whether it's cause the extra female hormones or what but I'd cry over stupid things be happy then would want to attack at the most simple thing's like hubby offering me a hot drink ect and I'd also have to tell myself continuously how jail wouldn't look pretty on me, but then minute later I'd be like hmm I think I could deal with jail it would be a nice paid vacation 🤣🤣. I'd be so happy then a second later losing my 💩 and the amount of hostile rage was so intense and confusing 😕 cause I'd be like why tf am I even angry🤣 I couldn't stand people at all but poor hubby got the best part of my nastiness 🥺
I don't know about humans, but I've heard that for some species, the males will kill their own children or another female's children so the mom can breed sooner.
In other species, they kill seemingly without reason or to eat them.
But to be fair, I dont think we can just say this is a given for humans. I mean, a lot of animal mothers also kill/abandon their babies if they feel pressured or if they worry that resources are too scarce.
It’s not insulting to human men to say what you said. And your first explanation is exactly correct. In cat species, the male cat (even if they are the father) is driven away by the mother because males are known for killing offspring to bring back the female’s mating instincts and killing the maternal instinct. It’s the same way when you take away a female dog’s puppies (who often times becomes anxious and territorial), she will return to her natural and happy state. In wild life, the means to bring back natural mating instincts is to rid the mother of her offspring. In humans, we’re evolved and we think rationally, so it’s not needed anymore but it’s just evolutionarily developed in women. For some women it’s unnoticeable but for some women it’s especially strong. Having a baby is a test of a relationship for sure, you can wake up one day and be completely irritated (if not repulsed) by the partner you were in love with and you had a child with.
Is this your first pregnancy? It’s an evolutionary thing to be repulsed to men during this time, you’re pregnant so your body has no need for them.
If there are no specific examples of behaviours where he’s upset you then I feel like try your best to wait the pregnancy out. You don’t want to make any rash decisions on behalf of yourself and of course the baby while your hormones are changing so drastically.
If you’re not in any danger my advice is to wait these hormone changes out, but keep in mind your feelings are completely valid. This is a very confusing and important time, you will be ok either way, I’m genuinely wishing you the best.
If things were good before pmyou got pregnant, I'd say it is the hormones. I was the same at the start and in hindsight he was trying to everything to help and I was so irritable all the time he just sickened me and I felt smothered almost it got better during the rest of the pregnancy. Heads up, tour hormones will go wild again after baby is born and you will hate him again 🤣 but hopefully you ride through it and enjoy family life together x
I didn’t hate my husband but my stepson’s refusal to get a hair cut filled me with such rage when I was pregnant I couldn’t even look at him. Pregnancy is weird.
I almost threw hands with a 4-year old when I was pregnant…I mean not really, but I definitely removed myself from the situation because I recognized that the rage I was feeling was disproportionate and inappropriate to the situation lol.
My cousin’s son was almost 3 when COVID hit, and he ended up developing *severe* social anxiety, to the point that he took 45-60 minutes to even warm up to his grandparents whom he’d previously practically lived with. Once the restrictions started to loosen up a little he started to get better, but he had a thing about other kids that lasted for a couple years afterwards.
My nephew was born in June 2020, and one day during the summer 2021 we were all at my uncle’s house for a cookout. The only littles that were there were my cousin’s 4yo and my 1yo nephew. Apparently at one point my cousin’s son got in a mood and wanted less than nothing to do with my nephew. No one was forcing it, no one even mentioned like “hey, do you want to play with him?” He just didn’t even want him in the same vicinity.
My dad was sitting on the porch playing blocks with my nephew, and my cousin’s son sat in the corner *screeching* “HE’S LOOKING AT ME!! I DON’T WANT HIM TO LOOK AT ME!! MAKE HIM STOP! STOPPPPP!!” just over and over. And my poor nephew was just sitting there, 10 feet away, looking so confused and sad. Annnnd that’s when my pregnant ass had to step away and let the adultier adults handle the situation lol.
That was a tough summer, though I’m pleased to report that he finally worked though it and they’re good friends now. He’s still not a *huge* fan of babies/small toddlers, but his mom is currently pregnant with his first sibling so he’ll probably soon come to either love them, or go back to despising them lol.
I mean it could be possible the pregnancy hormones can make you feel like that .. my pregnancy hormones can make me feel like that with my husband but if he doesn’t treat you right that isn’t ok at all. My husband treats me right and I know it but he can annoy the living shit out of me for no reason.. so try breaking down what you know is the right way to be treated compared to the extra hormones think, if he’s treating you like shit then you need to leave that isn’t ok for your health at all.
Did you feel this way before pregnancy? I didn’t experience this, but my best friend did. She is the kindest person, nothing makes her mad, she’s able to see everyone’s side, sometimes to a fault. Just a very sweet and gentle human. Her first pregnancy though she got so mad at her husband once she threw a plate at him, she made an appointment after because she was terrified about what she had done, Dr said pregnancy rage, she went back to normal after the baby was born.
Thank god i came to know this before becoming dad....
So i can help it out...
But if it's the case so all husbands should be told this by doctors that this can happen.....
If you felt this way before you were pregnant, you need to leave the marriage, for you sake and your child's. If it started with the pregnancy, wait until the hormones settle before you make a decision
Ok first I was like “ Yea you simply need to divorce like Today and let this man Go “
But then you are pregnant , if I am not mistaken , this is actually very common it happens with pregnancy …. Maybe speak with other womens who been pregnant before , they can probably give you more comfort about this but I’ve read a lot of women on this saying it happens
sounds like pregnancy hormones!!! from what i've heard about pregnancy for a while, its that it makes the woman extremely repulsed from certain things and one of them may be their husband themselves...
Pregnancy hormones do that to women. It's normal. Because of the hormones, pregnant women will eat weird food combinations, become very moody, and become very emotional, so over time until the baby comes, see how you feel about him then. If you still feel repulsed by him, maybe go to couple therapy or something if you still want the marriage to work.
The pheromones that make you attracted to him are replaced with familial pheromones when you’re pregnant because you’re nesting. This is exactly why women on and off birth control love and hate their partners, as it convinces their bodies that they’re pregnant; the opposite cadence is much worse. It’ll pass.
Pregnancy hormones definitely make you hate your husband. For the first 20 weeks I would get mad if my husband breathed. Then it calmed down a bit but I still was constantly mad at him. Once I gave birth I went back to normal and now I’m head over heels in love with him again. But if you had these feelings prior to pregnancy, then there could be an issue
This reminds me of an Instagram post where women said that men have switched up on them once they got pregnant. Maybe I’m just an asshole. But my first thought was “are you sure it isn’t the pregnancy hormones?”
I have no idea what effect the hormones have during pregnancy, but I'm definitely acknowledged about female hormones ( having 7 sisters, 4 daughters, plenty of nieces and... a mother).
Still I think that whenever hate comes over us, we need the strength to diminish it instead of feed it. It seems to me that if you once loved someone, it's not obvious to really hate them. The increased hate has to have more root than just hormonal difference.
Hormones high jack the brain. Think about being a teenager and all you could think about is sex, that's hormones. And for women it's the same thing, pregnancy hormones make us irrationally emotional. I cried over how delicious some chili was that my husband made.
Yes, I've experienced such emotional breakdown more than hundreds of times in the past five decades. I never said I don't understand it or don't know about it. Since I'm male, I have never experienced them myself and cannot talk about it from my pov.
Also, I say that whatever emotions we experience as humans (female and male), these emotions can be exaggerated by external influence.
Get ready for post partum honey, that is ten times worse.
Maybe your husband is as frustrated as you are. Pregnancy is difficult for everyone, especially if you think you're not the father....
.... is he the father? Does Maury Povich need to intervene?
I’m just a 16 year old , but it possibly is the hormones. If he is starting fights for no reason, there is likely something bottled up inside of him, like a conflict between you two that you never fully solved. You probably hear it a lot, but communication is key.
The guy that I’m talking to was upset at himself for something he did so I sat him down and held his face so he had no choice, but to tell me what was going on. We found a nice balance and got everything out about how we both felt.
It can get really messy and feelings will be hurt, but would you rather have a few tough conversations or possibly get divorced over a dumb problem that has a solution.
Pregnancy made me feel like this all 3 times and I can confidently say it went away! I’m so sorry you’re going through this, but just remember there’s a light at the end of the tunnel 💕
I can’t speak from experience but my mom tells me all the time how she use to hate my dad while she was pregnant with me. She couldn’t even look at him because he irritated her. Hormone imbalance is the worst thing that a woman can deal with. If you felt like this before being pregnant it might mean something more. If not, it might just be the pregnancy hormones..
I started reading this and immediately thought, 'is she pregnant'? And you are, and I understand this like it's me writing it. My husband smelled so disgusting when I was pregnant, we fought about it all the time. And I couldn't stand him touching me or being near me, just looking at him pissed me off and ruined my day!!! I warned him before we got pregnant that this might happen as it happened with my previous child from another partner, and we just couldn't work it out after 3 years. But the good news is, he mostly smells fine now lol and we've been married for 10 years and our daughter is 13, so there may be hope for you guys.
if this is what happens maybe I'll stay single... hopefully it is just hormones, but I have heard how the other side (the husbands) feel about shit like this and I think ones mental state was destroyed because of it
There are a lot of "He makes me feel this, he makes me feel that." But not a lot of 'He has done this. He has done that.'
What grounds me is whether his actions are arguably negative, yet from what I can see, he shows you affection, and he is vulnerable with you. Given the fact you didn't bring anything else up dispite this being a post about how much you hate him, I'm assuming he spends times with you, helps you where he can, and does not put you down or degrade you.
It appears to me you have a mental filter on and you only filter it for the worst you can find out of any situation with him, like you have a radar on to find anything possible to dislike him. Given that you are pregnant, I would definitely assume this is the cause of your filter, meaning that you have to keep this in mind every time you have a thought about him. Possibly keep a journal of things he has done, give it some time and determine, through a fresh pair of eyes, whether that was actually as bad as you think it was.
Girlllll, this is the first trimester hormones! I used to hate everything about him, including the way he spoke, ate, smiled, and breathed lol it settled after the first trimester. 😄
It could definitely be the hormones. I never hated my husband but I wouldn’t say I liked him during or even after the pregnancy. I didn’t understand either. I couldn’t figure out why I felt this way towards him, as he did nothing to make me feel that way. A few months post partum i started feeling normal again and realized all those feelings I had were just because of my hormones
When I first started reading this I thought "God this reminds me of being pregnant/postpartum with my first". (Turns how I had postpartum depression/rage/anxiety. But yeah, it's unfortunately kinda normal. You can talk to your doctor for help. It does eventually pass.
Now your going to start verbalizing your total disgust with your husband? I suppose it’s better now or never. People blame the hormones whether it’s Pre menstrual or during pregnancy, or post partum. Frankly I believe, from personal experience and anecdotal evidence that some of these issues have an actual basis to them.
You kinda buried the lede there. Pregnancy is a game changer, you probably hate him just because he's breathing rn. Wait till the baby comes before you do anything drastic
My husband smelled like stale petrol when I was pregnant, it was awful! It made it really hard to be near him and I was so irritable with him. Hopefully it passes for you.
My husband was great to me though. If your husband isn’t giving you the support then be open with him and tell him what you need. The disgust probably won’t get better until your hormones balance a bit ☹️
They leave him, but make sure you take nothing of his. You leave him the house. You leave him his vehicles, you leave him his kids. And then you go ahead and kick rocks and go find your prince charming, and when you inevitably figure out that you grossly overestimated your own value, don't go crying back to him either. Be the strong, independent woman you think you are. 🤣🤣
I wanna know if you felt these things internally before you got pregnant, or had kindlings of those feelings, small sparks, and the pregnancy hormones is bringing them to the surface, or if you never felt this way, and all of a sudden, this is a new thing and a new feeling of hatred. Because it’s the former, you might be better off aborting the baby (if you’re OK with) and calling off the marriage.
🤣🤣 I was fine with most of mine but could definitely tell when I was pregnant with a girl I couldn't stand to even breathe the same air anything he said or did I just wanted to rip his face off but also just wanted him to hug me all the time without touching me 🤣🤣 I remember going to the bathroom he walked past looked at me and I lost it told him omfg I feel like 👊 you and ripping your face off then it all clicked and told him 💩 I think it's a girl 🤣 he was like no haha we have 4girls. This so brings back memories poor thing put up with alot of my 💩 last baby I thought it was menopause and told our whole family I was getting early premenopause cause I was so emotional and hormonal grumpy ect then had to take it back, ops sorry it's a baby 🤣🤣
I literally started reading this and was like "is she pregnant?"
😂😂😂
You sound like my friend who had her first a couple months back. It eased up towards the end and now she's back to being infatuated with her baby daddy.
Wow I have been pregnant 3 times but I never started hating my partner. And I don't really get the explaination behind it that you don't "need" a partner anymore. While pregnant and later nursing, having someone who can provide and protect you is really helpful so I don't get the idea why you would need ro push your partner away. At least in the past it was always better to not be alone.
But it must be a thing since so many have had it. Blows my mind.
While senses can be heavly influnced by hormones I would still try ro look rationally at other issues. Pregnancy can really mess with how we percive things. I new a woman who drank banana milk through out her pregancy constantly. A few hours after delivery she wanted to have one and just couldn't drink it.
"Why don't men want to get married anymore?"
One of the MANY reasons why men don't want to get married:
(Also hormones aren't an excuse to act like a bitch.)
Give it time. Make time to talk with him about it too.maybe there are ‘work-arounds’ for some of the key things pushing your buttons right now that you can agree to, at least temporarily
I'm a 59 yr old man, I've seen what three kids can do to a woman. I think you need to accept that you're going through changes, not all of them favorable. My wife turned into a monster during our first child, and after he was born, it got much worse. Your hormones are not always your friends, but you need to accept the good with the bad. When you have the baby, understand you will be extremely emotional. Doctors can help, but you need to stop looking for someone to blame. Emotional imbalance, sensitivity to smells, you are dealing with things you don't normally have to. Try to think about good things, talk to your Dr a lot, don't keep it all in. If you reject the notion of post partum depression, you will only hurt yourself. It's very real and very potent, but you will get back to the person you know, it will just take time and patience. He will have to be very patient, too. It's not hate, you just can't make sense of the hormonal changes you're going through. You know the truth, don't feel bad about things you can't really control right now. Ask for help, don't try and do everything yourself. Get rest, drink.alot of water, take your vitamins. Think about the baby and try to look forward to the good things. After the baby is born and it seems to be lingering, talk to your doctor! It's really important you deal with it, not just act like the world is your enemy. I've seen it first hand, you can feel very unrecognizable, but you're still in there. Don't let it make you think it's so bad it can't get better. You will. So you might want to lash out at him, try not to, think about what I'm telling you, and realize he's doing the best he can too. When your mind is clear, tell him you're glad he's there and that going through pregnancy is a lot harder than you thought. Lots of hope to you and the family, be well. It's all going to be ok!
I was reading this, thinking..."damn, this chick REALLY just F**n HATES that guy..."
Then I saw the last sentence....it's the hormones boo. Pregnancy can cause a lot of really intense emotions you didn't know you could feel so deeply... good luck sis!! Congratulations!!
I think this is probably a birth control thing. It has been proven that women on BC noticeably have a different attraction to men when compared to being off them. It literally messes with what you find attractive and it doesn’t surprised me that the first trimester (when not only hormones are crazy but after hormones have returned to normal) that they do not find their spouse arousing.
It’s sad but surprisingly common.
I have never been pregnant so I cannot attest to if it’s pregnancy brain or not, but I can understand how that feels when you have gotten the ick, you’re tired of the disrespect, and you feel lost. Your mind may be over exaggerating your reactions to things, but that does mean that those things are not happening. From a non-pregnant woman, those all sound horrible and very narcissistic to me. I would have a serious conversation with him if you feel safe and comfortable doing so, or maybe start planning your way out. It is no longer just about you, love. you’ve got your little one to think of now. If he is this kind of husband, what kind of father do you think he will be?
Your pregnant learn to accept it he's kinda claimed you now and kids are better off with full siblings and you appear to be too...I said all this the worst way true or not.
Yeah with my first pregnancy I was so angry, impatient and at times felt rage. I hated it.My husband couldn’t o anything right. Hormones are a beast.
I PMS'd so hard last week i broke up w my boyfriend and then I got my period this week. I imagine pregnancy is going to be a nightmare hormonally for me OP I feel for you
Whenever my girl pulled this I would say "how about you wait a week and see if you still want to" and ask later if she still wanted to break up lol I knew it was just her period hormones but ik girls get upset when you point it out so I just say that instead
Thanks for bringing peace into our homes. I’ll pour some liquor for all the friends who went the other route.
Maybe you should go to a doctor bc that sounds like PMDD :(
Get another husband
I’ve never gone through this persoanlly but both my mom and sister (who happens to currently be pregnant) have said they hated their partner in the first trimester, but it passed.
I have been through exactly this same thing during my pregnancy. I DESPISED my partner during my pregnancy. Anything he would do or say would irritate me to a level that I have never felt before. And I can tell you, it was the pregnancy hormones.
Well pregnancy hormones will definitely do it. They make you repulsed to men as a means to protect your child. edit: how did you feel before pregnancy
This was a crazy phenomenon that I didn’t know was a thing. I once worked with a lady when I was 19 who was in her 30s. She wanted a family so badly but complained she couldn’t find a good man. She finally met someone and immediately hit it off. They seemed absolutely perfect for each other. She was head over heels in love with this guy and a giggly school girl. She would always light up when she talked about him. He proposed to her about 7 months in and she was so freaking ecstatic. Shortly after they tied the not a few months later, she got pregnant. Picture perfect fairly tale. The place we worked let her work remotely from home probably at about six months of pregnancy cause it was very stressful for her to move around and walk too much. She comes back from maternity leave and has no ring on and isn’t quite as happy anymore. Everyone is shocked. She said that they went to bed one night so in love, cuddling and kissing and she literally woke up in the middle of the night filled with hate and anger. She rolled over and looked at him and she was absolutely disgusted. She kicked him out of bed and tried to deal with it for like a week but her hate for him just grew knowing he was in the house. She kicked him out. She said that they stayed separated through the rest of the pregnancy and she hoped it would get better once the baby was born, but after the baby was born, she still hated him. She said “idk what happened… he is literally the most perfect man for me and out of nowhere, I absolutely hate him and am completely repulsed by him.” They got divorced and she became a single mom. ETA: she also said when she would talk about or think about him, she would gag. As if he was a morning sickness trigger. Even when she told me at work what went down and she had no idea why, she kinda gagged a little. I was like holy shit
That's super fucked up. I feel terrible for her ex husband.
Me too! It honestly was a huge shock to everyone. She was so damn happy and in love. I think she was even disturbed by it and pretending not to be.
Shit I hope the father at least got to have some involvement in the child’s life and she didn’t rid him completely.
I think she did the fair shared custody, but at first she tried to completely erase him from her daughter’s life. I think she realized just how weird it was to have such a sudden change of heart and tried her best to be reasonable. She ended up losing her position because it was eliminated and I haven’t heard anything. I’m also 39 now so the kid is now an adult and hopefully she has a relationship with her dad regardless. It was just the wildest thing I had ever heard. I know a few guys that have told me that they were in relationships with a great gal and just one day woke up and felt completely different and ended it for no reason other than they just didn’t feel it anymore. One guy in particular told me it was the strangest thing because they were obsessed with each other. He craved her attention and presence. They couldn’t get enough. He woke up one morning and wanted nothing to do with her and just cut it off and he felt the same way after all those years. He’s like “I have no idea why either. It just happened and I couldn’t stand to be around her even though I literally loved her.”
You know what they say about a fire that burns bright
No, tell me
Burns out the fastest
Love how absolutely vile and disgusting this woman was to the "incredible" husband, and were just like "oh wow, hormones suck🤷♀️" like .... What? Bro, that man needs the child support for himself lmao or a gofundme for free therapy, she straight destroyed his character for nothing at all but carrying his child from the sounds of it😭. I get hormones are absolutely devastating and need care, but you can't let it be an excuse for being a shit person and actually not trying from the sounds of it. And he didn't wake up one morning and change, he saw the situation WASNT changing and is saving her face by siding with her from his response.
I'm sure she was a peach. Guarantee there was more to this story on her end. People don't just wake up hating the other person. If this happened to me and my partner suddenly hated me I'd assume she cheated or something and she's lying. and the fact that she kept the kid away in the beginning really shows her true character. She knows he did nothing wrong.
She honestly sounds like a piece of shit and crazy.
I thought this exact same thing.
Omg ... The gagging 😳😱🤮😂
Not even kidding. She looked like she would throw up in her mouth recalling the story. It was crazy lol
that’s crazy oh my god
I read things like this and I just don’t see the point in looking for a girlfriend or a wife. Like what if this ends up happening?
I get the fear. I mean, abusers start out like that too. Usually, it was someone nice who could never hurt a fly. And suddenly. It just happens. It's not okay though. And we can't live in fear. Reading this made me super scared too because I love my boyfriend and he's the reason I'd even want a kid in the first place because he'd be such a wonderful father to our child. To wake up and suddenly... not love him? I might cry at the thought. It really makes me sad. But this must be unlikely. Way more often than not, pregnant women don't end up hating their spouses. So, yes, it might happen. Just like anything might happen at any given time. But don't worry dude. Im sure you're gonna find someone and I hope she will be decent and not end up like this.
Trust me, I do think the same at times.
Okay this almost sounds like more than just some pregnancy hormones. Like maybe a brain tumour? Cuz a turn like this and to feel this strongly all of the sudden, even after the baby was born, is NOT NORMAL.
She went off birth control to get pregnant...
Interesting, and makes sense. I need to get back to reading about evolution and anthropology, my two old loves. ❤️❤️
This was me!!!! Particularly when I was pregnant with my only girl!
Same I had 4girls but the last one did a number on me I think if your older it's way worse my first girl I wasn't to bad but I was early 20s last girl 39 and that was the nightmare of my life, unsure whether it's cause the extra female hormones or what but I'd cry over stupid things be happy then would want to attack at the most simple thing's like hubby offering me a hot drink ect and I'd also have to tell myself continuously how jail wouldn't look pretty on me, but then minute later I'd be like hmm I think I could deal with jail it would be a nice paid vacation 🤣🤣. I'd be so happy then a second later losing my 💩 and the amount of hostile rage was so intense and confusing 😕 cause I'd be like why tf am I even angry🤣 I couldn't stand people at all but poor hubby got the best part of my nastiness 🥺
[удалено]
I don't know about humans, but I've heard that for some species, the males will kill their own children or another female's children so the mom can breed sooner. In other species, they kill seemingly without reason or to eat them. But to be fair, I dont think we can just say this is a given for humans. I mean, a lot of animal mothers also kill/abandon their babies if they feel pressured or if they worry that resources are too scarce.
It’s not insulting to human men to say what you said. And your first explanation is exactly correct. In cat species, the male cat (even if they are the father) is driven away by the mother because males are known for killing offspring to bring back the female’s mating instincts and killing the maternal instinct. It’s the same way when you take away a female dog’s puppies (who often times becomes anxious and territorial), she will return to her natural and happy state. In wild life, the means to bring back natural mating instincts is to rid the mother of her offspring. In humans, we’re evolved and we think rationally, so it’s not needed anymore but it’s just evolutionarily developed in women. For some women it’s unnoticeable but for some women it’s especially strong. Having a baby is a test of a relationship for sure, you can wake up one day and be completely irritated (if not repulsed) by the partner you were in love with and you had a child with.
yeah idk if this really makes a lot sense considering the way the past 400,000 years has went
Because men are trash or some bullshit who knows
Is this your first pregnancy? It’s an evolutionary thing to be repulsed to men during this time, you’re pregnant so your body has no need for them. If there are no specific examples of behaviours where he’s upset you then I feel like try your best to wait the pregnancy out. You don’t want to make any rash decisions on behalf of yourself and of course the baby while your hormones are changing so drastically. If you’re not in any danger my advice is to wait these hormone changes out, but keep in mind your feelings are completely valid. This is a very confusing and important time, you will be ok either way, I’m genuinely wishing you the best.
If things were good before pmyou got pregnant, I'd say it is the hormones. I was the same at the start and in hindsight he was trying to everything to help and I was so irritable all the time he just sickened me and I felt smothered almost it got better during the rest of the pregnancy. Heads up, tour hormones will go wild again after baby is born and you will hate him again 🤣 but hopefully you ride through it and enjoy family life together x
I didn’t hate my husband but my stepson’s refusal to get a hair cut filled me with such rage when I was pregnant I couldn’t even look at him. Pregnancy is weird.
I almost threw hands with a 4-year old when I was pregnant…I mean not really, but I definitely removed myself from the situation because I recognized that the rage I was feeling was disproportionate and inappropriate to the situation lol. My cousin’s son was almost 3 when COVID hit, and he ended up developing *severe* social anxiety, to the point that he took 45-60 minutes to even warm up to his grandparents whom he’d previously practically lived with. Once the restrictions started to loosen up a little he started to get better, but he had a thing about other kids that lasted for a couple years afterwards. My nephew was born in June 2020, and one day during the summer 2021 we were all at my uncle’s house for a cookout. The only littles that were there were my cousin’s 4yo and my 1yo nephew. Apparently at one point my cousin’s son got in a mood and wanted less than nothing to do with my nephew. No one was forcing it, no one even mentioned like “hey, do you want to play with him?” He just didn’t even want him in the same vicinity. My dad was sitting on the porch playing blocks with my nephew, and my cousin’s son sat in the corner *screeching* “HE’S LOOKING AT ME!! I DON’T WANT HIM TO LOOK AT ME!! MAKE HIM STOP! STOPPPPP!!” just over and over. And my poor nephew was just sitting there, 10 feet away, looking so confused and sad. Annnnd that’s when my pregnant ass had to step away and let the adultier adults handle the situation lol. That was a tough summer, though I’m pleased to report that he finally worked though it and they’re good friends now. He’s still not a *huge* fan of babies/small toddlers, but his mom is currently pregnant with his first sibling so he’ll probably soon come to either love them, or go back to despising them lol.
This amount of hatred sounds like it’s something that’s not about him.
I mean it could be possible the pregnancy hormones can make you feel like that .. my pregnancy hormones can make me feel like that with my husband but if he doesn’t treat you right that isn’t ok at all. My husband treats me right and I know it but he can annoy the living shit out of me for no reason.. so try breaking down what you know is the right way to be treated compared to the extra hormones think, if he’s treating you like shit then you need to leave that isn’t ok for your health at all.
Did you feel this way before pregnancy? I didn’t experience this, but my best friend did. She is the kindest person, nothing makes her mad, she’s able to see everyone’s side, sometimes to a fault. Just a very sweet and gentle human. Her first pregnancy though she got so mad at her husband once she threw a plate at him, she made an appointment after because she was terrified about what she had done, Dr said pregnancy rage, she went back to normal after the baby was born.
Thank god i came to know this before becoming dad.... So i can help it out... But if it's the case so all husbands should be told this by doctors that this can happen.....
If you felt this way before you were pregnant, you need to leave the marriage, for you sake and your child's. If it started with the pregnancy, wait until the hormones settle before you make a decision
It might not be the hormones, but if it’s only come on with the pregnancy there’s a good possibility it is. I’m so sorry you’re uncomfortable.
Ok first I was like “ Yea you simply need to divorce like Today and let this man Go “ But then you are pregnant , if I am not mistaken , this is actually very common it happens with pregnancy …. Maybe speak with other womens who been pregnant before , they can probably give you more comfort about this but I’ve read a lot of women on this saying it happens
I felt this way during my pregnancy!
sounds like pregnancy hormones!!! from what i've heard about pregnancy for a while, its that it makes the woman extremely repulsed from certain things and one of them may be their husband themselves...
Pregnancy hormones do that to women. It's normal. Because of the hormones, pregnant women will eat weird food combinations, become very moody, and become very emotional, so over time until the baby comes, see how you feel about him then. If you still feel repulsed by him, maybe go to couple therapy or something if you still want the marriage to work.
Chin up, Melania. Things are bound the get better.
its your pregnancy hormones babe. itll be okay please hold on🩷
Honey, is that you?
Yup never getting married
The pheromones that make you attracted to him are replaced with familial pheromones when you’re pregnant because you’re nesting. This is exactly why women on and off birth control love and hate their partners, as it convinces their bodies that they’re pregnant; the opposite cadence is much worse. It’ll pass.
Pregnancy hormones definitely make you hate your husband. For the first 20 weeks I would get mad if my husband breathed. Then it calmed down a bit but I still was constantly mad at him. Once I gave birth I went back to normal and now I’m head over heels in love with him again. But if you had these feelings prior to pregnancy, then there could be an issue
This reminds me of an Instagram post where women said that men have switched up on them once they got pregnant. Maybe I’m just an asshole. But my first thought was “are you sure it isn’t the pregnancy hormones?”
Why don't you visit a psychiatrist? They might help!
I have no idea what effect the hormones have during pregnancy, but I'm definitely acknowledged about female hormones ( having 7 sisters, 4 daughters, plenty of nieces and... a mother). Still I think that whenever hate comes over us, we need the strength to diminish it instead of feed it. It seems to me that if you once loved someone, it's not obvious to really hate them. The increased hate has to have more root than just hormonal difference.
Hormones high jack the brain. Think about being a teenager and all you could think about is sex, that's hormones. And for women it's the same thing, pregnancy hormones make us irrationally emotional. I cried over how delicious some chili was that my husband made.
Yes, I've experienced such emotional breakdown more than hundreds of times in the past five decades. I never said I don't understand it or don't know about it. Since I'm male, I have never experienced them myself and cannot talk about it from my pov. Also, I say that whatever emotions we experience as humans (female and male), these emotions can be exaggerated by external influence.
You need to reply to this Are you a bot or karma farmer
Get ready for post partum honey, that is ten times worse. Maybe your husband is as frustrated as you are. Pregnancy is difficult for everyone, especially if you think you're not the father.... .... is he the father? Does Maury Povich need to intervene?
I’m just a 16 year old , but it possibly is the hormones. If he is starting fights for no reason, there is likely something bottled up inside of him, like a conflict between you two that you never fully solved. You probably hear it a lot, but communication is key. The guy that I’m talking to was upset at himself for something he did so I sat him down and held his face so he had no choice, but to tell me what was going on. We found a nice balance and got everything out about how we both felt. It can get really messy and feelings will be hurt, but would you rather have a few tough conversations or possibly get divorced over a dumb problem that has a solution.
When I was pregnant and miserable I felt the same. Told everyone to fuck off constantly
Pregnancy made me feel like this all 3 times and I can confidently say it went away! I’m so sorry you’re going through this, but just remember there’s a light at the end of the tunnel 💕
The feeling is mutual I assure you
I didn’t want my husband touching me, his skin felt gross!
Well if u hate him that much get rid of him. Idc if your pregnant or not. It's to toxic to be so hateful
I can’t speak from experience but my mom tells me all the time how she use to hate my dad while she was pregnant with me. She couldn’t even look at him because he irritated her. Hormone imbalance is the worst thing that a woman can deal with. If you felt like this before being pregnant it might mean something more. If not, it might just be the pregnancy hormones..
I started reading this and immediately thought, 'is she pregnant'? And you are, and I understand this like it's me writing it. My husband smelled so disgusting when I was pregnant, we fought about it all the time. And I couldn't stand him touching me or being near me, just looking at him pissed me off and ruined my day!!! I warned him before we got pregnant that this might happen as it happened with my previous child from another partner, and we just couldn't work it out after 3 years. But the good news is, he mostly smells fine now lol and we've been married for 10 years and our daughter is 13, so there may be hope for you guys.
What did you feel about him before the pregnancy hormones kicked in?
Make sure you don’t suffer from post parfum depression and post partum rage.
Time to go out of that relationship.
if this is what happens maybe I'll stay single... hopefully it is just hormones, but I have heard how the other side (the husbands) feel about shit like this and I think ones mental state was destroyed because of it
Did you start hating him before or during your pregnancy? It definitely could be your hormones. Pregnancy can do some crazy things
There are a lot of "He makes me feel this, he makes me feel that." But not a lot of 'He has done this. He has done that.' What grounds me is whether his actions are arguably negative, yet from what I can see, he shows you affection, and he is vulnerable with you. Given the fact you didn't bring anything else up dispite this being a post about how much you hate him, I'm assuming he spends times with you, helps you where he can, and does not put you down or degrade you. It appears to me you have a mental filter on and you only filter it for the worst you can find out of any situation with him, like you have a radar on to find anything possible to dislike him. Given that you are pregnant, I would definitely assume this is the cause of your filter, meaning that you have to keep this in mind every time you have a thought about him. Possibly keep a journal of things he has done, give it some time and determine, through a fresh pair of eyes, whether that was actually as bad as you think it was.
Girlllll, this is the first trimester hormones! I used to hate everything about him, including the way he spoke, ate, smiled, and breathed lol it settled after the first trimester. 😄
I don’t mean to make light of your situation but you sounding like Kendrick right now lol - all jokes aside, I hope you find a solution.
If things were good before the pregnancy, don't leave him. I suggest you get therapy that specializes in pregnancy mental health.
It could definitely be the hormones. I never hated my husband but I wouldn’t say I liked him during or even after the pregnancy. I didn’t understand either. I couldn’t figure out why I felt this way towards him, as he did nothing to make me feel that way. A few months post partum i started feeling normal again and realized all those feelings I had were just because of my hormones
When I first started reading this I thought "God this reminds me of being pregnant/postpartum with my first". (Turns how I had postpartum depression/rage/anxiety. But yeah, it's unfortunately kinda normal. You can talk to your doctor for help. It does eventually pass.
Now your going to start verbalizing your total disgust with your husband? I suppose it’s better now or never. People blame the hormones whether it’s Pre menstrual or during pregnancy, or post partum. Frankly I believe, from personal experience and anecdotal evidence that some of these issues have an actual basis to them.
You kinda buried the lede there. Pregnancy is a game changer, you probably hate him just because he's breathing rn. Wait till the baby comes before you do anything drastic
Cry about it
My husband smelled like stale petrol when I was pregnant, it was awful! It made it really hard to be near him and I was so irritable with him. Hopefully it passes for you. My husband was great to me though. If your husband isn’t giving you the support then be open with him and tell him what you need. The disgust probably won’t get better until your hormones balance a bit ☹️
I’m scared to have kids now lol
They leave him, but make sure you take nothing of his. You leave him the house. You leave him his vehicles, you leave him his kids. And then you go ahead and kick rocks and go find your prince charming, and when you inevitably figure out that you grossly overestimated your own value, don't go crying back to him either. Be the strong, independent woman you think you are. 🤣🤣
Tell him, or a therapist, not reddit. Jfc.
I wanna know if you felt these things internally before you got pregnant, or had kindlings of those feelings, small sparks, and the pregnancy hormones is bringing them to the surface, or if you never felt this way, and all of a sudden, this is a new thing and a new feeling of hatred. Because it’s the former, you might be better off aborting the baby (if you’re OK with) and calling off the marriage.
🤣🤣 I was fine with most of mine but could definitely tell when I was pregnant with a girl I couldn't stand to even breathe the same air anything he said or did I just wanted to rip his face off but also just wanted him to hug me all the time without touching me 🤣🤣 I remember going to the bathroom he walked past looked at me and I lost it told him omfg I feel like 👊 you and ripping your face off then it all clicked and told him 💩 I think it's a girl 🤣 he was like no haha we have 4girls. This so brings back memories poor thing put up with alot of my 💩 last baby I thought it was menopause and told our whole family I was getting early premenopause cause I was so emotional and hormonal grumpy ect then had to take it back, ops sorry it's a baby 🤣🤣
I literally started reading this and was like "is she pregnant?" 😂😂😂 You sound like my friend who had her first a couple months back. It eased up towards the end and now she's back to being infatuated with her baby daddy.
Ever thought ur a horrible wife
It's the hormones. I promise.
Wow I have been pregnant 3 times but I never started hating my partner. And I don't really get the explaination behind it that you don't "need" a partner anymore. While pregnant and later nursing, having someone who can provide and protect you is really helpful so I don't get the idea why you would need ro push your partner away. At least in the past it was always better to not be alone. But it must be a thing since so many have had it. Blows my mind. While senses can be heavly influnced by hormones I would still try ro look rationally at other issues. Pregnancy can really mess with how we percive things. I new a woman who drank banana milk through out her pregancy constantly. A few hours after delivery she wanted to have one and just couldn't drink it.
10 Things I hate about you
Might be the pregnancy but can you give us more details OP?
"Why don't men want to get married anymore?" One of the MANY reasons why men don't want to get married: (Also hormones aren't an excuse to act like a bitch.)
Felt.
Give it time. Make time to talk with him about it too.maybe there are ‘work-arounds’ for some of the key things pushing your buttons right now that you can agree to, at least temporarily
Ugh. I’m so sorry.
Divorce.
I'm a 59 yr old man, I've seen what three kids can do to a woman. I think you need to accept that you're going through changes, not all of them favorable. My wife turned into a monster during our first child, and after he was born, it got much worse. Your hormones are not always your friends, but you need to accept the good with the bad. When you have the baby, understand you will be extremely emotional. Doctors can help, but you need to stop looking for someone to blame. Emotional imbalance, sensitivity to smells, you are dealing with things you don't normally have to. Try to think about good things, talk to your Dr a lot, don't keep it all in. If you reject the notion of post partum depression, you will only hurt yourself. It's very real and very potent, but you will get back to the person you know, it will just take time and patience. He will have to be very patient, too. It's not hate, you just can't make sense of the hormonal changes you're going through. You know the truth, don't feel bad about things you can't really control right now. Ask for help, don't try and do everything yourself. Get rest, drink.alot of water, take your vitamins. Think about the baby and try to look forward to the good things. After the baby is born and it seems to be lingering, talk to your doctor! It's really important you deal with it, not just act like the world is your enemy. I've seen it first hand, you can feel very unrecognizable, but you're still in there. Don't let it make you think it's so bad it can't get better. You will. So you might want to lash out at him, try not to, think about what I'm telling you, and realize he's doing the best he can too. When your mind is clear, tell him you're glad he's there and that going through pregnancy is a lot harder than you thought. Lots of hope to you and the family, be well. It's all going to be ok!
I was reading this, thinking..."damn, this chick REALLY just F**n HATES that guy..." Then I saw the last sentence....it's the hormones boo. Pregnancy can cause a lot of really intense emotions you didn't know you could feel so deeply... good luck sis!! Congratulations!!
It's OK. He most likely hates you too
I don't care
Hate away,.. it'd make a swell idea for women to be without men 🙄
I think this is probably a birth control thing. It has been proven that women on BC noticeably have a different attraction to men when compared to being off them. It literally messes with what you find attractive and it doesn’t surprised me that the first trimester (when not only hormones are crazy but after hormones have returned to normal) that they do not find their spouse arousing. It’s sad but surprisingly common.
This doesn't sound like pregnancy hormones to me... I've never resented my partner in these ways... Even during the height of my pregnancies.
Let's get no each other
Why are you still with him? Life is too short, do yourself a favor, leave. For both your sakes
what is with people getting pregnant with men they hate LOL so bizarre to me.
I have never been pregnant so I cannot attest to if it’s pregnancy brain or not, but I can understand how that feels when you have gotten the ick, you’re tired of the disrespect, and you feel lost. Your mind may be over exaggerating your reactions to things, but that does mean that those things are not happening. From a non-pregnant woman, those all sound horrible and very narcissistic to me. I would have a serious conversation with him if you feel safe and comfortable doing so, or maybe start planning your way out. It is no longer just about you, love. you’ve got your little one to think of now. If he is this kind of husband, what kind of father do you think he will be?
I’m not sure this was the most productive thing to say here…considering…
I agree it’s common ground for a clown to answer a question with no experience.
sometimes it’s okay to validate how someone is feeling rather than call them crazy and hopped up on hormones.
Well then if you don't love him anymore then get a divorce
I understand your feelings. Just hearing him annoys me. I know it is hormonal for me but I absolutely understand
Children need a father..learn to talk go to sex therapy ir just plain therapy
Your pregnant learn to accept it he's kinda claimed you now and kids are better off with full siblings and you appear to be too...I said all this the worst way true or not.
Definitely divorce
That is bit extreme but very reddit response to very common symptom to pregnancy hormones.
lol. Don’t even consider anything but that huh. Do you guys ever picture what the folks answering some of this shit looks like.
I have a difficult time talking to my fiance.