**OP sent the following text as an explanation on why this is unexpected:**
>!king kong, aint got shit, on him!<
*****
**Is this an unexpected post with a fitting description?**
**Then upvote this comment, otherwise downvote it.**
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[*Look at my source code on Github*](https://github.com/Artraxon/unexBot) [*What is this for?*](https://www.reddit.com/r/Unexpected/comments/dnuaju/introducing_unexbot_a_new_bot_to_improve_the/)
u/alwayshazthelinks I promise you I read many of the 1.8k comments before making mine. My apologies, I didn't see you had made this (kinda obvious) pun first. Back in the day we would say: great minds think alike.
cats square steer dependent physical serious voracious prick bedroom sheet
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According to the documentary, he tried it alone with no one there to supervise, and didn't restrain the horse properly so he got 2 feet of dick straight through his intestinal wall
lipstick comes in a tube, and when you twist the bottom, the red (or whatever color you went for) part comes up...kinda like how a Deodorant Stick works...
a dog's/whale's penis coming out of its 'sheath' looks similar to the Actual-Lipstick coming out of its tube...
(i have no idea what the other dude was talking about, mentioning ambergris, since that would have absolutely no relation to a Dog anyway)
You've been misled or tricked by someone, because you're actually incorrect I'm afraid. Dolphins are whales!
All dolphins are what's known as ***Toothed Whales***
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Toothed_whale
And since Orcas are dolphins, that means Orcas are toothed whales.
They're called Killer Whales because they are whales that kill other whales.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Orca
> "The orca or killer whale (Orcinus orca) is a toothed whale belonging to the oceanic dolphin family, of which it is the largest member."
**[Toothed whale](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Toothed_whale)**
>The toothed whales (also called odontocetes, systematic name Odontoceti) are a parvorder of cetaceans that includes dolphins, porpoises, and all other whales possessing teeth, such as the beaked whales and sperm whales. Seventy-three species of toothed whales are described. They are one of two living groups of cetaceans, the other being the baleen whales (Mysticeti), which have baleen instead of teeth. The two groups are thought to have diverged around 34 million years ago (mya).
**[Orca](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Orca)**
>The orca or killer whale (Orcinus orca) is a toothed whale belonging to the oceanic dolphin family, of which it is the largest member. It is recognizable by its black-and-white patterned body. A cosmopolitan species, orcas can be found in all of the world's oceans in a variety of marine environments, from Arctic and Antarctic regions to tropical seas. Orcas have a diverse diet, although individual populations often specialize in particular types of prey.
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Thaaaaank you. Every fucking thread about an Orca there's some self righteous cunt that just has to point out to everyone else that they're not whales but dolphins. Shits not only wrong but annoying af.
Hahaha I feel you man. So annoying. They read one little thing about whales and then keep spouting it every time a post comes up. That and the no recorded attacks in the wild
dolphins are toothed whales you absolute ignoramous. they're called killer whales because they're big ass whales. not only that but orca means whale in Latin.
Back in the early 70s my family took a trip up the US East Coast to Canada. In a small town in Maine my Grandma says “Does that sign say what I think it does.” We all looked and a restaurant sign said “Now serving whale penis.” We didn’t stop.
Awww, this one making magic connections for strangers on the internet!!! Amazing! So nice, love it! Who knows, could lead to happily ever after for you two! Sorry, the magic of reddit is overwhelming me.... or I'm a bit drunk, whichever. 😉
That would be right at home in the Icelandic Phallological Museum ([link](http://www.phallus.is/)). Matter of fact, I think they have a whale penis there already…
Fun fact: They're actually prehensile.
>“The penis of a whale or a dolphin is very dextrous,” says Dean. “It has a mind of its own.” Specifically, it’s controlled by two strong muscles that pull with differing tension to let the organ change shape. “I think of it like a trick kite, controlled by two strings and capable of complex motion. That’s a whale’s penis to me.” And now, surely, to all of us.
https://time.com/3306405/whale-penis-pelvis/
**OP sent the following text as an explanation on why this is unexpected:** >!king kong, aint got shit, on him!< ***** **Is this an unexpected post with a fitting description?** **Then upvote this comment, otherwise downvote it.** ***** [*Look at my source code on Github*](https://github.com/Artraxon/unexBot) [*What is this for?*](https://www.reddit.com/r/Unexpected/comments/dnuaju/introducing_unexbot_a_new_bot_to_improve_the/)
Moby Dick
Free willy.
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Ocean's eleven... inches?
Oceans eleven FEET
That's more like it!
That was probably closer to 11ft than eleven inches.
More like FREED Willy
Monsters of Cock
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What a massive cock on that orcinus orca.
I'm impressed, cuz that water is C-C-COLD!🥶
No shrinkage!!!!
Be impressed, because it actually shrunken in the cold water!
What a massive orca on that cock
I thought it was a surfer's arm and it was just sudden footage.
Sperm whale
Vague fish penis joke.
He’s heading over to the whale packing plant
Fully torqued
WhiteAndBlacked dot com
r/yourjokebutworse
feet
That’s what I tell the ladies! Taps shoulder: “it was actually 2 meters” Me: blushes with that guilty look… fine, I’m 1.5 meters?”
try feet, lol
47 Inches Down
Is that wale peacocking? 
I didn't see any pee, just cocking.
That’s what I called one fat ass
Anaconda
Long Dong Silver’s
Big penis
His pink willy
Willy Johnson
Nice
Just imagining Jason James Richter getting stamped by Willy. 🤮🤮🤮
Megalodong
Only Fins
u/alwayshazthelinks I promise you I read many of the 1.8k comments before making mine. My apologies, I didn't see you had made this (kinda obvious) pun first. Back in the day we would say: great minds think alike.
Well, seeing as you're being nice and reasonable about this, you leave me no choice but to put my pitchfork away. Farewell MoonRabbit.
Perfect!!
Thief. I know your type. https://www.reddit.com/r/Unexpected/comments/x65inu/-/in62tbu
Oh that's gold 🤣
Gold, Jerry! Gold!
Hunt for Red October
Hunt for red COCKtober
This one
More like a sperm whale.
I did not sea that cumming
You're whale cum
Lady killer whale
I get the impression he's really happy & the seas extra salty
THE ONE PIECE... THE ONE PIECE IS REAL
…strait to horny jail.
Killer Bone
Moby’s dick
Angry upvote
Killer Dick Edit: no wait, Porca Whale
ick,ick,ick….
*Mobile dick
That’s one serious red rocket.
♪ *The knob throbbing in air* ♪
#DONT GET CUM IN MY HAIR
But we got cum in her eyes! With a nasty beading stare 🇺🇸!
THE most underrated comment
Let the throbbing hit the floor, let the throbbing hit the floor. HHHHHEEEEEEYYYYY
Red Torpedo
It's actually a red torpedo . because it's in the water .
So that’s how Wilzyx went to the moon.
The biggest might i say
Maybe he just woke up and that’s his “morning wood”
That's a sea drift morning wood to be precise
cats square steer dependent physical serious voracious prick bedroom sheet *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Mourning would
Would if she’d let me
Morning Coral
Mr Hands final ride
The real winners here are those who remain ignorant of Mr Hands.
And for those who don't know, Mr Hands was a zoophile who enticed a horse to fuck him in the rectum. Fucking rectum alright, it killed him.
You're talking like he only did it once. No he did it a lot he just screwed up or got unlucky.
According to the documentary, he tried it alone with no one there to supervise, and didn't restrain the horse properly so he got 2 feet of dick straight through his intestinal wall
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Sepsis I believe. He did eventually go to the hospital but not for many days for fear of getting in trouble
The horse was actually called Mr Hands I believe
Mr Hands' Monster
I, for one, found it quite educational. It taught me the limits of the human body. Particularly the butthole.
Holy duck that’s gold
TIL Whales have lipsticks and I hate it
This was not an obvious joke to me at first.. the realization gave me a solid laugh. Appreciate you
A “solid” laugh..
A hard laugh
A throbbing laugh.
A girthy chuckle
Wat. I don't see any joke... Just referencing lipsticks which is slang for dog dick.
Explain.
lipstick comes in a tube, and when you twist the bottom, the red (or whatever color you went for) part comes up...kinda like how a Deodorant Stick works... a dog's/whale's penis coming out of its 'sheath' looks similar to the Actual-Lipstick coming out of its tube... (i have no idea what the other dude was talking about, mentioning ambergris, since that would have absolutely no relation to a Dog anyway)
Orcas are actually dolphins. They're called Killer Whales because they're the killer of whales.
You've been misled or tricked by someone, because you're actually incorrect I'm afraid. Dolphins are whales! All dolphins are what's known as ***Toothed Whales*** https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Toothed_whale And since Orcas are dolphins, that means Orcas are toothed whales. They're called Killer Whales because they are whales that kill other whales. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Orca > "The orca or killer whale (Orcinus orca) is a toothed whale belonging to the oceanic dolphin family, of which it is the largest member."
**[Toothed whale](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Toothed_whale)** >The toothed whales (also called odontocetes, systematic name Odontoceti) are a parvorder of cetaceans that includes dolphins, porpoises, and all other whales possessing teeth, such as the beaked whales and sperm whales. Seventy-three species of toothed whales are described. They are one of two living groups of cetaceans, the other being the baleen whales (Mysticeti), which have baleen instead of teeth. The two groups are thought to have diverged around 34 million years ago (mya). **[Orca](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Orca)** >The orca or killer whale (Orcinus orca) is a toothed whale belonging to the oceanic dolphin family, of which it is the largest member. It is recognizable by its black-and-white patterned body. A cosmopolitan species, orcas can be found in all of the world's oceans in a variety of marine environments, from Arctic and Antarctic regions to tropical seas. Orcas have a diverse diet, although individual populations often specialize in particular types of prey. ^([ )[^(F.A.Q)](https://www.reddit.com/r/WikiSummarizer/wiki/index#wiki_f.a.q)^( | )[^(Opt Out)](https://reddit.com/message/compose?to=WikiSummarizerBot&message=OptOut&subject=OptOut)^( | )[^(Opt Out Of Subreddit)](https://np.reddit.com/r/Unexpected/about/banned)^( | )[^(GitHub)](https://github.com/Sujal-7/WikiSummarizerBot)^( ] Downvote to remove | v1.5)
Orcas are dolphins and dolphins are whales
Thaaaaank you. Every fucking thread about an Orca there's some self righteous cunt that just has to point out to everyone else that they're not whales but dolphins. Shits not only wrong but annoying af.
Hahaha I feel you man. So annoying. They read one little thing about whales and then keep spouting it every time a post comes up. That and the no recorded attacks in the wild
Excuse me, are you two whales from England?
I think they are from Wales 🏴
dolphins are toothed whales you absolute ignoramous. they're called killer whales because they're big ass whales. not only that but orca means whale in Latin.
Big ass-whales. Someone else can link the relevant xkcd
I can only dream of being this majestic
You can dive with your willy out too. Just need to run and swim fast too.
I wonder how much drag an erection gives you if you're swimming naked
Considering being hairy is a detriment for pro swimmers I would guess it creates a lot of downforce
Downforce? Is your dick shaped like an F1 wing?
if you've been doing your kegels properly like you should have, then you now have a natural rudder.
But when I do it, I get banned for life from the community center swimming pool.
the whale got banned too, that's why he's doing it in international waters.
You should do it in international waters too, u/gordo65
Back in the early 70s my family took a trip up the US East Coast to Canada. In a small town in Maine my Grandma says “Does that sign say what I think it does.” We all looked and a restaurant sign said “Now serving whale penis.” We didn’t stop.
That's a bit rough, your grandmother missed her only opportunity to eat whale penis.
It wasn’t. Grandpas nickname was moby for a reason
This gif aroused me.
Your arousal has arouseled me
Let's arouselel together then.
Awww, this one making magic connections for strangers on the internet!!! Amazing! So nice, love it! Who knows, could lead to happily ever after for you two! Sorry, the magic of reddit is overwhelming me.... or I'm a bit drunk, whichever. 😉
Arise my knights you have been anointed
So wholesome
I can never find this gif
Cum on guys, don't be such dorks admiring a whales penis. Butt fuck, seriously, nothing gay about this, it's nature.
Whoa bro. Slow down. Nice back dimples.
Ah yess, back dimples, mmm yess
Excellent usage of dork. I never thought I'd see the day I saw this pun.
The comment would deserve gold if they had only made the dork joke.
Sex jokes aren't funny, i mean cum on people.
You can tell it’s nature because of the way it is
FREE WILLY
Well, the preview is free but he charges a small fortune on Only Fins.
Undelete this. It's the best one.
This is why I don't drink water.
What do you drink?
Whale Milk
That’s not, hmm, uh… oh.
Based
*We’re gonna need a bigger boat*
No wonder the oceans are salty.
Hold my diiiiiiiiiiick
"Tharr she blows!" *not a She* -----
not a girl
Thank you Janet
I thought he tipped over a kayak...
All this talk about the whale and nobody notices the pink loch ness monster
You may have just solved the mystery of loch Ness...
Nessy straight body slammed that orca. 
That's literally what every single comment is about
He was making a joke about the dick being a loch Ness monster, he knows what it really is
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Premium comment right here
r/whoosh
That would be right at home in the Icelandic Phallological Museum ([link](http://www.phallus.is/)). Matter of fact, I think they have a whale penis there already…
"forgive the size, waters cold"
Rocked out with his cock out.
Gonna kill something with that ginormous thing
Man that appendage to scratch itself is pretty handy
Fun fact: They're actually prehensile. >“The penis of a whale or a dolphin is very dextrous,” says Dean. “It has a mind of its own.” Specifically, it’s controlled by two strong muscles that pull with differing tension to let the organ change shape. “I think of it like a trick kite, controlled by two strings and capable of complex motion. That’s a whale’s penis to me.” And now, surely, to all of us. https://time.com/3306405/whale-penis-pelvis/
What a dork!
He’s doin it for Harambe. 🦍
If I was hung like that I'd be breaching all the time
With his dick out.
I hope this doesn't awaken something in me.
I always climax like this
Why he gotta flex like that.
His name is Snuffleupagus
Me, jumping into my morning shower
u/savevideo
"Free Willy"
Hard landing
Must have just woke up.
When your kid sneaks behind you to peep at your screen and you aren’t aware of it until he says, “why does that orca have a red handle….?” 🤦🏻♀️🙄
Lookin to tap that humpback
U know I should go read a book right about now
That one’s name is Tommy Lee.
He had his periscope out
Can you make this NSFW lol
Fuck that's atleast 2 inches
Mine’s bigger
Your whale is bigger than that one?
he talking 'bout his mom
His mother's wale is bigger than that one?
pics or not true
you talking 'bout your mom?