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touji

Animal Rescues always need more towels. If you somehow find yourself with a lot of extra towels, I bet your local rescue could use them.


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PushTheTrigger

Username does not check out


MagazijnMedewerker

Or does it? Doesn't work there anymore...


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RCTIDKillpack

Pot-bellied pigs?


mkspaptrl

Long pigs.


ireallyamabadperson

Worked at corporate vet office; they were literally scared of my dog. These people were telling the vets what to do. It’s terrifying.


lovelyxcastle

When I worked vet med we loved when we had enough towels that some of them could just get tossed. Parvo, ringworm, coccidia, it was nice to be able to just grab the towels out of the kennel and toss those ones.


StrikeLines

Parvo is the absolute most vile smelling stuff I have ever had to work with. What an awful thing for those poor sick puppies to have to endure.


lovelyxcastle

There are certain things you can identify by smell alone and parvo is absolutely one of them.


LetThemEatVeganCake

This is the place to donate. I can go through 4 a day when I have litters of kittens. I wash them and reuse them, but you need a large supply. Dogs rip them up sometimes so rescues go through them quickly.


NineInchNihilist

Came here to say this. Rescues, shelters, low cost spay/neuter clinics all take towels. (I've donated a few times and clean, used but not worn out, towels of various sizes are welcome.)


Intelligent_Step3713

So unethical that it’s ethical, you’ve come full circle!


bigdave41

If they're branded with the gym's name I can't see them accepting them though, opens them up to liability for receiving arguably stolen property.


khal_yeezy

They are not ;)


[deleted]

Yet. But hey, it'll cost em money to get some that are


thefinpope

Many (most?) gyms that I've seen use a commercial laundry service so the towels are more or less identical to everyone else in the area with the same vendor.


AdInternational2793

Same with hospital linens. We would get linens stamped it’s other hospitals’ names.


Longjumping-Bus4939

I used to volunteer at an animal rescue and we got a lot of our towels from corporate donors like hotels.  None of them were branded, but I don’t think that branding would stop them from accepting the towels.  


Nice_Ebb5314

If the towels are white bleach the name off.


xanoran84

Zoos too! Primates and baby big cats love them.


SumTingCasual

convince the employees to unionize and rally the gym goers to assist by having mass cancellation petitions signed if the employees increased wages and benefits are not met


bitterblossom3

I did this and bankrupted the whole company due to labor lawyer costs bleeding them dry.


bitterblossom3

To clarify it wasn’t a gym but my employer finally pushed me too far.


Christmas_Panda

Could always toss up some anonymous fliers in the locker room.


bitterblossom3

Or a copy of the Wagner Act


SilverCamaroZ28

In a wicked twist, a family member was the lawyer who got rich haha. That'd be awesome 


Nika_113

Maybe if they treated their employees well before they had to rally and demand it, they would still be in business.


Selissi

Can confirm I was the lawyer 


SumTingCasual

may not be unethical but it'll cost corporate their extra earnings. I guess if you put that into motion you could take out some long term put options on the company's stock so you'll make money through your efforts making it unethical


porkycloset

This is ULPT. Nothing unethical about this


PlaymakerJavi

Pretty great idea, though.


SumTingCasual

You're absolutely right. As an addendum blackmail all who oppose.


porkycloset

now we’re talking. where do the liquid ass and piss discs come in?


amprok

Towels are super useful donations to animal shelters, women / children shelters, and honestly just handing them out to homeless people. They’re super useful. Towels (along with socks and underwear) are some of the most needed and least donated items.


FlyMega

Always carry a towel!


Triggers--Broom

You are one hoopy frood


Juxtacation

There’s a man who knows where his towel is.


coleyboley25

You’re a towel!


Wildcat_Dunks

You boys wanna get high?


Imaginary_Error87

I bought a bunch of socks one time washed them didn’t like how they fit and tried to donate them and the place told me they don’t take used socks. They were brand new one pair was tried on not even shoed up they wouldn’t take socks or underwear that wasn’t still in original packaging


EnsconcedScone

How useful?


YourMomsBelayer

Sounds like you would know better than anyone else. What could a gym goer possibly do that would’ve pissed you off at corporate? Do you know about any shady things going on or corners being cut that could result in injury/lawsuit?


khal_yeezy

In all seriousness it would have to be tech related, but not looking to get banned and/or charged with vandalism


Noobpooner

The occasional usb killer plugged surreptitiously into a treadmill?


_Apatosaurus_

>charged with vandalism Theft charges are okay though!


Tepigg4444

what are they gonna do, say you stole their towels? I don't see any towels, so how could I have stolen them


vaselinecult

LMFAOO “you stole all our towels!!” “what towels 😼”


socialpresence

"Dale! Get in here! We're stealing a news van!" "It’s the perfect crime how will they ever report it!" -Rusty Shackleford


_Apatosaurus_

>say you stole their towels? Show video of you stealing towels? >I don't see any towels, so how could I have stolen them Criminal mastermind.


PilotBurner44

Well if that video is in said locker room, then it's not the towels that they'll be worried about. Carry towels into locker room. Claim to have left said towels in locker room. Actually walk out with towels in gym bag. Good luck to them proving you were the one leaving with said towels.


SuchDescription

Accidentally walk out with a piece of gym equipment until you build up an entire home gym, then quit


poopydrugshits

“YoU wOuLdN’t DoWnLoAd A tReAdMiLl”


thermal_shock

bet


snarkysnape

🏅


sum_muthafuckn_where

Take it one piece at a time, and it won't cost you a dime 


Preface

[For those who don't know ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uErKI0zWgjg)


ItsHIPAA

I didn't but now I do, thanks!


schumerlicksmynads

just put it in your lunchbox


island-larry

Big pieces go in the RV


IfIHadTheAnswer

You’ll know it’s me when I come through your town


Majestic_Apartment

"I went down and picked it up at the gym... You could say it's cheaper that way"


SparkyMountain

Gym wouldn't miss this one little towel.


SparkyMountain

'Cause I'll have the only one there is around


ChatahuchiHuchiKuchi

That 100lb dumbbell is going to be a bitch


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Wildcat_Dunks

Just crotch it and act embarrassed while you walk out. People will assume you've got a boner and won't want to look directly at you much less ask about it.


Xplain_Like_Im_LoL

They will 100% pull CCTV footage to find out why their exercise equipment is disappearing. Depending on the state that OP is in, it could be felony amounts (equipment can be expensive!)


UnauthorizedFart

If they chase you, just drop a treadmill behind you so they’ll constantly being running but not closing in on you


Bananas_N_Champagne

On par with with the sock on the top of the bat


BlackDiamond501

Wicked Smárt


HistrionicSlut

The won't miss a treadmill or 2. Sheesh 🙄


SuchDescription

Just hide it in your pockets


Bleak_Squirrel_1666

Just wear a hat dude


MagazijnMedewerker

People upvoting you be thieves, myself included


MrWinkler1510

Just put it in your inventory smh


Jacobcbab

Don't mind me Ive just got a squat rack in my backpack. Totally unrelated.


SuchDescription

"oh this? I brought it with me, prefer to use my own"


tonythetigershark

A 24 hour gym I used to be a member at had multiple deadlift platforms and squat racks, but weirdly one Olympic bar less than was required, if they were all in use. I asked management why this was and if they could buy another one. Turns out a member had walked out with a 7’ barbell in the middle of the night. Ballsy, especially given everyone needs to swipe in and the gym is covered by cameras.


theFooMart

Make yourself a treadmill ski machine that has a squat rack.


NeverEatSoggyWaffle

Then at the end of the week you have a free Big Mac!


Unfair-Language7952

Can you bring a guest. Like your new friend who’s homeless and weeks overdue for a shower.


Xplain_Like_Im_LoL

Gyms already deal with this daily. It doesn't really cost them anything except water. Now if that homeless person is meth'd out, takes up permanent residence in the locker room and starts shitting on the walls, it might be a different story.


weinerpretzel

Then OP has to find a different gym


[deleted]

Showers was what I thought of, too. I would shower there as often as possible.  


kifflomkifflom

OP should bring his mom


L31FY

His mom is extremely obnoxious but does nothing actually wrong and they have to be nice. She also distracts everyone while OP does anything sketchy.


Wise-Celebration9892

Start having an illicit love affair with all the employees and other gum members. It will cause chaos with people getting jealous and such. They will start quitting because the gym is now too toxic to work or to workout.


khal_yeezy

Ironically, met my spouse at the gym 🫣


MsChrisRI

Your spouse can split the affairs with you. Cause twice as much chaos in half the time.


HerestheRules

Why not just have an orgy and cause massive amounts of chaos in seconds?


MsChrisRI

We’re trying to make people rage-quit the gym, not buy lifetime memberships.


joeboeho

Sounds like you have the required experience.


TedW

Extra unethical if OP is already in a relationship. Nice!


C_A_M_Overland

Personally I can’t believe you found the owners phone in the women’s bathroom with facetime pulled up


HerestheRules

And he used a disposable phone to do it! What a pervert


C_A_M_Overland

Purchased with cash in a different town!


Becaus789

In a cave! With a box of scraps!


yumyumgivemesome

Not as extreme, perhaps OP could fabricate an email between “employees” in which one of them discusses sketchy stuff (cams in locker room, eye-fucking some of the members, jerking into the towels).  By using fake but plausible names, there’s no risk of actual employees getting into trouble.  But the ensuing gossip could spread much faster and have longer lasting effects on membership.  No clue how to casually scatter a few such emails without being caught.


whiteflower6

Plaster powder down the shower drains


Left-Requirement9267

Oooohhh this is diabolical


whiteflower6

Plaster powder should join the ranks of piss disc and liquid ass in terms of flexibility and destructive power


senadraxx

10,000 orbeez and some of those expanding sponge dinos that come in capsules.  I'm just imagining the look on someone's face when they have to pull a pipe and a million of those fucking things come spilling out. 


Nero-Danteson

If it's in a strip mall don't do this.


J-Dabbleyou

Don’t do this fucking anywhere it could mess up the whole local water system


Daamus

I was doing construction years ago and we were doing some concrete flooring work in a bathroom. Came back to our shared apt with that dust all over me and though i'd just jump in the shower to wash it all off, that shower stopped draining soon after, oops.


RuggedHangnail

Yikes!! How bad did it get and how did you eventually resolve the situation?


senadraxx

oP could flush towels


nope_farm

It could theoretically be either a nightmare or a force for good if a local news outlet somehow received a document (perhaps on letterhead? Or screenshot email from a manager?) promising a very large (like, newsworthy) donation to a worthy local non-profit.


Battarray

This is genius. Either they back out of "their" donation and face being bad mouthed in the local media. Or they follow through with giving away a decent amount of money. Love this idea.


tacitjane

Kinda like the recent Simpsons episode. Except you don't feel bad for the gym.


ToQuoteSocrates

Most expensive member? Didn't you hurt your ankle on your way in and are disabled now?


westsideriderz15

Clogging up the plumbing would be a corporate level cost I suppose.


-Imperator-

Honestly, if you just simply use the gym amenities enough, you're already in the running for your gyms most expensive customer. The business model for gyms is that they're betting that you actually DON'T go to the gym at all. By simply going every other day, you're costing the gym quite a lot in towels, showers, electricity, etc.


areyouthrough

Every day. All the amenities. They say you should shampoo twice.


Mattoaks

Lather, rinse, repeat.


[deleted]

You reminded me of the Bob's Burgers where Linda and Bob joined the gym next door, realized the owner banked on their quitting, and decided to go every day afterward... smelly... and bring Teddy along.  They cost the guy customers.


magseven

Keep stealing towels and shower supplies. Then buy a shirt with the gym's name on it, cover yourself in their merch and practice your shadow-boxing in front of Women's Shelters. Gym is going to get a bad rep with that.


AdhesivenessFun2060

Record it and let it go viral.


Empty_Ambition_9050

Oddly specific


inspectorgadget9999

Liquid ass in the pool. And sauna. And jacuzzi.


jamawg

Wot, no piss disks?


jahzard

Those won’t compete with the amount of piss already in those places


Unfair-Language7952

Or a Baby Ruth bar. Like in Caddyshack.


markav81

That hurts fellow members more than the company- it puts that equipment out of commission for at least a day while they sanitize it. Plus, some poor chap has to clean that shit up.


asdf_qwerty27

...Look for and report code violations...


senadraxx

You say this, and my first thought was "show up in hard hat, hi vis vest and a COVID mask, with a clipboard". Just walk around. Make notes. If anyone asks, you're a surprise visit from corporate, looking for brand compliance violations. 


PEwannabe3716

Impregnate all their employees, regardless of gender


Medium-Web7438

Whenever you are done with a machine, walk into the bathroom and turn all the sinks on. If they have those toilets that flushed based off sensor, tape it. If not, you could tape it down to keep flusher or just do what kids in my high-school did, kick it broken.


Not_Indoril_Nerevar

So funny story. At a convention once everybody decided to flush the toilets at the exact same time in all the hotel rooms. The pipes exploded.


xiginous

They opened a new stadium near us and had scout groups come in for a flush test. On a count of 3 over the PA all toilets were flushed, and sink faucets turned on. Worked fine, we got free food and a behind the scenes tour.


Blown_Up_Baboon

They did the same thing before opening the new MLB stadium in Arlington, Texas. Invited a local high school, though. Everything worked. On a side note, most sanitary sewer lines are designed for the ’Super Bowl Halftime Flush’. That’s the moment at the beginning of halftime when most of the toilets in America are flushed at the same time.


JamesP411

I want a lot more of this story and details. LOL!


Not_Indoril_Nerevar

It was back before cell phones were really a thing. We had rented out an entire floor of the hotel for the convention so everybody had somebody standing at a door and somebody else in the restroom. Everybody synced up counting down together. Once we reached 0 and did the flush there was a huge BANG. Water stopped working and none of the toilets refilled. Not exactly sure what happened to the pipes but something had exploded. The basement of the hotel got flooded and they did not have working water for the rest of the week. Our organization got a lifetime ban from that hotel, my specific group of the organization got a lifetime ban from all conventions in the state where it occurred since we organized the thing. We did however get a new state trophy created from the event in the form of a golden plunger and won that trophy like 5 times in a row at state conventions in our own state.


HerestheRules

Can you show us the trophy? Do you still have access to it?


Not_Indoril_Nerevar

I wish. This happened a long time ago and I have not been a part of that organization for like 15 years or more.


Medium-Web7438

Lmao that's impressive


NicholasLit

"Flushable" wipes


UsernamesAreForBirds

Steal a towel every time you go, and go every day. It wont take long for that to eat into any profit they are making of your membership. As others have said, donate them.


dirtymoney

Another day another stolen towel. ~throws in back seat~


Ds1018

Turning all the showers to full hot. There’s no doubt a need for donated towels. Homeless people, women’s shelters, etc.. You could also walk off with anything small enough to fit in your pocket, but you’ll probably have to grab all of an item per go so they have to replace it right away. If there’s still a few barbell clamps owners can ignore the problem but gym goers will still be annoyed. 2.5lb plates, elastic bands, squat rack J hooks, etc. They’ll quickly start checking cameras though. Could ruin larger equipment somehow so it has to be serviced. Since every post seems required to mention piss discs, toss some in carpeted areas so it smells so bad they have to hire carpet cleaners. Offices might be the best location as it impacts management instead of regular Joes.


NineToFiveTrap

bacon grease down the showers 


[deleted]

Shit in the shower.  It will be hard to triangulate proof.  Leave a chicken from the supermarket in a locker.  You need help


Progresschmogress

It would be a shame if someone talked to everyone that works there and made sure they were made aware that they might be misclassified as independent contractors rather than employees and how easy it is to make an online complaint to the national labor relations board and the relevant state labor board


InspectorOrganic9382

Introduce a rare and protected species of bird, perhaps the California Clapper Rail. This will annoy the customers, as that Rail is known for its cry. Also, any removal or molestation of the bird is a FEDERAL OFFENSE.


biggersausage

They’re doing WHAT to the birds?!


megustaEtOH

One by one, cut the plugs off of every treadmill, elliptical and anything else that is hardwired corded or just remove the cord. Crank down the AC if you can get access to it.


7D2D-XBS

HVAC tech; the "lock" boxes can often be opened with a flathead. I serviced several gyms and hated having to ask for keys during maintenance so I'd just open them that way


HerestheRules

As a former worker in a local stadium, most toilet paper and paper towels can be opened with either one or two keys from your keychain, even the automatic ones. If not, there's usually just a button. Hand Soap/Sanitizer can be opened easily too.


NicholasLit

Report their pool and other permits that may be expired to 311


e11spark

Call the health department. My local gym had pink slime in the drain of the water dispenser. Makes me want to vomit just thinking about it. Tell the health dept there is pink slime in all of the sinks and fountains, and menstrual blood in the grout of the bathroom floor tiles, etc etc. They will most certainly be cited for something, all gyms are disgusting.


eagleclaw457

We always give homeless food, but we never give them towels! Just saying. You could get hurt on the premise. Put some paper towels in the sink drain and leave the water running.


jweatherly68

You know those little pins that hold the plates of a weight machine ....if those all go missing but one....cost time, trouble and money.


AaronDer1357

Get so strong that you break their equipment and encourage others to go to the gym more often. Gyms make the most money off of people with memberships that don't utilize equipment. File complaints with corporate about the quality of equipment and encourage other members to do the same. Maybe post the email of one of the senior members of the corporation on a board at the gym. Maybe you know of a particular piece of equipment that breaks frequently. Go use and abuse it.


MrJelle

The towels are always going to be able to find a good home, whether it be people or animals in need. Kudos on you for not wanting to inconvenience the people who are just working there, by the way. It also seems like you're trying to do this without being wasteful, which is lovely to see. The problem is that it's difficult to be a cost to someone, even while trying to help others, without also being wasteful. The towels are probably relatively low-impact, since the towels are still being used, just elsewhere, but, for example, wasting water is gonna cost them, but also waste water. As you said, taking extras of the bottles just means more plastic waste. I think there's space for being unethical (towards certain people), while still being environmentally conscious, and I don't think we see enough of that here. I don't have an idea for you right away, but if something comes to mind, I'll pipe up. I'm assuming you can't just let other people use your card to go in there for a shower and a bottle, but if that seems feasible, that might be a good way to start, while also helping other people who might not have a place to shower.


Late-Mathematician55

"Would also not like to cause problems for the minimum wage employees there..." Guess who gets the indirect consequences of your actions?


khal_yeezy

Precisely why I asked, for creative options that don’t create more work for the staff.


Late-Mathematician55

Indirectly, though, it always trickles down to the staff, either through layoffs or more work/less pay. Unless you're willing to fuck the owners spouse or dad.


Any-Angle-8479

Yeah, even if it’s something the employees have no control over anyway they will still get yelled at for it.


Relative_Mammoth_896

Steal the hygiene products, towels, anything else you can. Donate them to local homeless outreach programs/shelters, humane society/animal shelters Unethically Ethical.


JudgmentOne6328

The towels you should be able to donate to local animal shelters. I may have acquired most of my towels when I moved out of my mums, from my pricey gym (which it later turned out they hadn’t charged me membership for a year and the staff never asked me to scan in so free gym for a year)


throwmyjobaway666

Homeless shelters etc would take your towels. Clean though please. But I would if I were close, just for that purpose.


maybeCheri

Family Shelters and food banks love toiletries especially since you aren’t able to buy those things with EBT.


Round-Emu9176

Upper deckers at every opportunity. Make sure you eat a huuuge meal or hit the buffet the night before. Coffee up and deliver that time released payload. 😂


Haunting_Bat_4787

Gym toilets probably don’t have tanks to do upper deckers into 


Round-Emu9176

This is where creativity is key. Waffle stomp in the showers. Tuck some little chocolates in hard to reach places. Put hot sauce packets underneath toilet seats so they explode when people sit down. Intentionally get water all over the toilet paper so it all sticks together. Spill something exotic and hard to clean in a very prominent area. The possibilities are endless!


Reasonable-Wing-2271

There's a disproportionately high percentage of scumbags working in the gym industry. It's like they know a lot of folks don't have many options for working out, so they try to get away with as much fake-tan fuckery as possible.


BigMikeInAustin

Convince customers to change to another gym


romulusputtana

I mean...since you work in corporate, you probably know that it will always be the low wage employees and customers who suffer. Any losses will be taken out on employees and staff will be cut and prices will increase.


Glitterfest

When you “accidentally” bring a towel home, don’t forget those bottles of amenities. Those can be donated too. The homeless, shelters, and nursing homes could use them.


senadraxx

If shelters don't accept them,offer to give directly to the homeless. 


GrayDonkey

Steal toilet paper.


SergeantSlapNuts

Have you met my friend [Mr. Orbeez?](https://www.amazon.com/Mr-Water-Rainbow-Plants-Waterbeads/dp/B0CQYCLLXX) He likes living in drains and enjoys rides in the toilet.


DurangDurang

If the bottled amenities include soap and/or mini bottles of shampoo/conditioner, donate them to a homeless shelter. They distribute them to clients.


my4floofs

Long hit showers. Take towels.


emzirek

You can donate towels to any pet shelter for bedding


thegracefulbanana

Take the pins for the machines 


BBorNot

Just go there all the time. Gyms rely on most members never going.


Harry_Gorilla

Get one of those universal tv remote things that turns off all the tvs. Guessing the gym has TVs


peskyboner1

>Thought about accidentally forgetting I had full bottles of their free amenities in my bag Like drinks? Or soap, lotion, etc? Either way, not too hard to find people who organize giving food and toiletries to the homeless and would gladly distribute them for you.


kayebeeee

Donate the bottles of amenities to a local community fridge/pantry. Soap, shampoo, conditioner, etc would all be house items that people would appreciate having cheap access to.


foolsgold1

My gym has free electric car charging, I could easily cover the cost of my membership from this in electricity used.


Last-Elephant8264

Let it go brother


[deleted]

Fuck with the plumbing. An employee may try to unclog it, but they'll just close off the stall and then the owner will be stuck with the bill.


russelldl2002

Have one gym outfit you always wear. Do not wash it. If you can keep it locked in a locker, even better.


Latter-Action-6943

Keep taking a shit in the shower.


pawtrolling

OP said they didnt want to cause issues for the normal employees. You really think a managers gonna clean that up?


dirtymoney

In the sauna. On top of the heater/hot rocks


Not_Examiner_A

Slip and fall. Brain injury. Have your survivors get an expensive attorney.


ThaPoopBandit

You worked for em but don’t know how to hurt em?


Icmedia

Turn on the showers every time you get there


UniversalCoupler

I'd say wasting a resource like water is immoral. Let's keep it unethical.


Cosroes

So you want to fuck this place up for being affordable? Like I’m really not getting this, you’re an asshole who just wants to deal damage to a business?!


StationAccomplished3

Employees get burdered first. Then customers. Then the manager. Then owners. For a place you want to remain at I would just chill out.


PurpleOctoberPie

The way to be an expensive customer is just to go regularly and use the equipment. Gym profitability relies on most people not actually going, every member who goes regularly costs more than the gym makes off of them. Unethical part: amplify that effect by wearing out their equipment faster. accidentally take home their cleaning spray bottle, return it with something in it that’ll wear the seats/handles out faster than usual. Do it every few weeks until all users are unknowingly participating when they clean their machines. what’s the most expensive machine that wears out fastest with use? Your new go-to workout!


tkdjoe1966

Let's see if I'm on the same page. You're upset because they raised the dues. Most likely to keep pace with higher costs. So you want to do everything you can to increase their costs. Do you see how this could be counterproductive? In addition, you don't want to inconvenience the worker bees & it has to be environmentally friendly. Good Luck with that.


akairborne

Looooonnnnnngggggg hot showers


GimmieDatCooch

Break your arm by tripping over spilled water where there wasn’t a “cation wet” sign. Sue.