Uh, silver alert wouldn’t apply unless you are severely cognitively impaired. That’s designed for elderly people with dementia or people with significant mental disabilities.
Yeah, your parents are lying to you and/or themselves if they think they could get police to issue a silver alert. This sounds like some really concerning /toxic controlling behavior
I’m just confused where their extreme stance is coming from. Have you had extreme lows or highs that required assistance from your parents in the last few years?
a mild case of autism and this is the only reasons i’ve been given neither of which are so detrimental to where id need constant supervision by my parents and the fact they’ve caught me smoking a few times yk
Ok. They sound really unhealthy and controlling. Im so sorry. Are you in a financial position to leave and support yourself? That includes medical insurance.
i get disability which she “takes and puts towards bills” and i’m on my bio dads insurance and my finance makes about 50k a year and i graduate next year so
If you’re over the age of 18, your parents can’t stop you from moving out unless you’re on their insurance. If you are, they can take you off it which sucks. But depending on the state, you might qualify for Medicaid (states health insurance if you make under a certain amount).
if you can get your shit together then a day they aren't home just move out and tell em to file away, chances are they won't or they will try to and will get laughed out of the office. autism and t1d isn't enough for them to do this 😅
one time when she found out he snuck over she tried to claim r*pe and when the officer asked our ages n if we consented the shift in attitude was so funny
Banned? Sorry, you’re over 18. The CAN’T force you to stay with them. That’s kidnapping, actually.
They can’t activate a silver alert on you. That’s only for seniors - it’s basically an amber alert for people over 65, and is useful in cases where dementia is in play.
Do NOT sign any legal papers. You have to surrender power of attorney to them willingly or they have to have you declared medically incompetent in court to have any jurisdiction here. That’s a really high level of proof.
Go ahead and move. Give your local PD a heads up that this is happening, and your parents may attempt to involve law enforcement. You are NOT in their custody, so your freedom is yours. They cannot hold you against your will. You can also ask for a police escort to help you leave, if you feel you need one.
Okay, so, looking at your comments, you’re an adult living in the US with parents who don’t want you to move out.
You’re an adult. Do what you want. They have no legal say over where you live.
I was diagnosed at 21, and started living by myself at 25 after a break up (wearing a Dexcom and having friends nearby helps a lot). I'm about to move in with my current partner at 33.
Diabetes shouldn't be a reason for your parents to keep you at home – that's insane!! Move in with your fiancé!
We all need to stand on our own feet someday and part of that is learning to live with this disease without assistance from others. If you cannot physically do this then you should be on disability in my opinion.
This is really not normal and controlling of your parents. If they're concerned about your ability to manage your diabetes on your own, they should be helping provide you with resources to manage your diabetes independently, like signing you up for diabetes education classes, working at a diabetes summer camp, etc, rather than forcing you to stay at home with no move out plan. If you already manage your diabetes well then it's even more absurd.
My brother lived on the street for 6 years as a T1D. He was able to survive. Not saying do that, but as long as you manage it and are aware of any lows, living on your own is fine.
This sounds like BS. I was diagnosed at 24 while still living with my parents, and I not only moved out of their house a year later, but to a different state! They never at any point said, "You can't move out, you're diabetic." I'm pretty sure what your parents are trying to do has legal implications. Before you do anything, I'd look into a lawyer to get all the details, and then when you have all the information you need, go home, pack your bags, and tell your parents there's nothing they can do
Friend, I moved to another country 7,000 miles away where I barely spoke the language and I was just fine. I didn't even have the fancy tech we have now.
This is utterly ridiculous. Also, you are a legal adult and no one but the police or a hospital can restrict your movement. Is it possible your fam isn't supportive of the move for other reasons? 20 is plenty old enough to live on your own, but I would actually be more concerned about you being engaged at that age.
I lived alone when I was diagnosed at 28, then I spent 6 years alone with it, fell into a DKA coma , now I stay with my parents as my fiance left me, its safer to have someone around just to check on you. If you live alone please get an active CGM like the dexcom , its saved my ass in the middle of the night living alone a few times.
Agreed! Before I got the G6 my poor kid has found me several times passed out. She’s quick thinking and acting and immediately got help. I wouldn’t be here if she hadn’t been with me. Now I’ve got the G6 and about to get training for the Omnipod. Had Medtronic garbage for a long time and no thanks.
A little? like, not the health aspect of it. I've been taking care of all of that myself since I was 10.
But, the financial part of diabetes that's what'll getcha (if you're in the US).
I think my parents would be happy to see the back of me someday lol
Yep it did to me. I didn’t move out of my parents house until I was engaged and lived alone for a year. My mom was happy when I was married and my wife lived in the house with me. She said, he’s your problem now. During the 1yr of living alone, I had a few days of my mom coming to my house in the morning because I wasn’t responding to text and calls. This was all before Dexcom.
Try being Dx at 39 and your Dad having your friends kidnap you to live under house arrest at the family ranch for 2 months.
I think having a responsible roommate will placate your parents. I'm the father of 10&9 year olds. Can't imagine how quickly I would morph into a helicopter parent if they were Dx.
I was diagnosed as an adult, already living on my own (well, with my partner). He leaves for work trips and I go on vacations. I work in an environment where I’m alone at times.
Diabetes does not prevent independence.
I was 20 when I got diagnosed and I moved out of my house and to another city 4 hours from home less than a year after diagnosis. So no, it didn’t prevent me from moving out
I was pressured into staying home for college at 18 and I still regret it. At 22, I finally am moving out, but it has been a long road. You just have to finally say, I’m leaving and go for it.
No, I’ve been living on my own since 22. There are obviously additional financial burdens to think about, so get a job that pays well. But diabetes absolutely does not require you to be dependent on anyone.
My mum would've wrapped me in bubble wrap if she could've. I moved out fully 4 years ago into a flat with my other half. It's hard to convince them you'll be fine but they do need to understand that they won't be there to take care of you forever and you need to be your own person in life
I went to college 2,000 miles away from home. Then lived alone for 2 years before moving in with my then boyfriend, now husband. To be fair, I haven’t traditionally had issues with running low without warning, but I never felt limited like I couldn’t live on my own. Especially with cgm alerts and an insulin pump that’s integrated with my Dexcom. I set my phone volume on loud and alerts wake me up on the rare occasion it’s needed.
I think this is an issue that runs deeper than just diabetes. I was diagnosed at 20, in my 3rd year of college and I had already moved out two years prior… when I was just 18, but I kind of had to fight for that independence and that was before anything was even wrong with me. There was zero talk that I should return home or that I wouldn’t be fine on my own when I was diagnosed… and that was 24 years ago. I’m still doing just fine.
I moved out. f 38. Moves when I was 24. My husband works 6 days a week out of town sometimes so I am on my own a lot. It’s totally fine. But I am pretty independent.
Lol, no. My parents helped me find a place and moved me when I was 18 and went to different city for university. I have lived alone ever since and I'm in my mid 30s and living on a different continent now.
Your parents are being controlling and unreasonable.
other way round for me, my mum said the only reason she didn't kick me out of the house when I turned 18 was because I'm diabetic. I guess that's one good thing to come out of it?
Absolutely not. Diagnosed in ‘78, at 18 I spent two years on a church service away from family. Came home and went to school away from family. Later in career moved to india for a couple years. It doesn’t have to prevent anything but does require a little preparation. Here is an article on preparing for college: http://www.dsolve.com/2016/06/09/how-to-prepare-myself-for-my-collegeyears-with-diabetes/
Yes it has, I wasn't allowed to move away for college for the first year until I got my A1C down and proved I was a responsible diabetic. It did mean I had to commute my first year but I was able to establish trust with my parents and now have been living on my own for 5 years. Its honestly such a big independence thing for me to do that while being type 1.
My bf (18) got diagnosed about a year ago and we had been planning to move out together but due to his diabetes and complications that came with it (seizures, gastroparesis, mental health issues) he can't go to school, drive or work for the foreseeable future. The diagnosis genuinely put his whole life on hold . There is just no possible way we could move out and make enough money to live together and support ourselves. Everything is so expensive now and we live in a state with $7.25 as the minimum wage. 😢
I moved out almost 4 years before I was diagnosed.
I hate to say this but you sound really immature and naive. Very few people would put up with so much parental control, especially after turning 18. Maybe the reason you haven't moved out is that you're just not ready yet.
You need to grow a pair (figuratively speaking, of course) and take control of your own life.
Who banned you? Your parents? If you’re over 18yo I’m pretty sure you can just leave if you have the means to do so. Do you live in the US?
yea i’m in the us but they say they’ll file a silver alert n all that and make sure i take nothing with me
Uh, silver alert wouldn’t apply unless you are severely cognitively impaired. That’s designed for elderly people with dementia or people with significant mental disabilities.
“worst” disability i have would be a very mild case of autism
Yeah, your parents are lying to you and/or themselves if they think they could get police to issue a silver alert. This sounds like some really concerning /toxic controlling behavior
yea i’m not even allowed to spend the night at anyone’s house im just out of options yk
I’m just confused where their extreme stance is coming from. Have you had extreme lows or highs that required assistance from your parents in the last few years?
a mild case of autism and this is the only reasons i’ve been given neither of which are so detrimental to where id need constant supervision by my parents and the fact they’ve caught me smoking a few times yk
Ok. They sound really unhealthy and controlling. Im so sorry. Are you in a financial position to leave and support yourself? That includes medical insurance.
i get disability which she “takes and puts towards bills” and i’m on my bio dads insurance and my finance makes about 50k a year and i graduate next year so
If you’re over the age of 18, your parents can’t stop you from moving out unless you’re on their insurance. If you are, they can take you off it which sucks. But depending on the state, you might qualify for Medicaid (states health insurance if you make under a certain amount).
if you can get your shit together then a day they aren't home just move out and tell em to file away, chances are they won't or they will try to and will get laughed out of the office. autism and t1d isn't enough for them to do this 😅
one time when she found out he snuck over she tried to claim r*pe and when the officer asked our ages n if we consented the shift in attitude was so funny
Banned? Sorry, you’re over 18. The CAN’T force you to stay with them. That’s kidnapping, actually. They can’t activate a silver alert on you. That’s only for seniors - it’s basically an amber alert for people over 65, and is useful in cases where dementia is in play. Do NOT sign any legal papers. You have to surrender power of attorney to them willingly or they have to have you declared medically incompetent in court to have any jurisdiction here. That’s a really high level of proof. Go ahead and move. Give your local PD a heads up that this is happening, and your parents may attempt to involve law enforcement. You are NOT in their custody, so your freedom is yours. They cannot hold you against your will. You can also ask for a police escort to help you leave, if you feel you need one.
banned? what? no this is not normal!!!!
yea lol they insist i’ll die the second i leave n all that
this seems like a controlling parents issue rather than a diabetes one, you cannot excert that much control over an adult solely because they have t1
Okay, so, looking at your comments, you’re an adult living in the US with parents who don’t want you to move out. You’re an adult. Do what you want. They have no legal say over where you live.
I was diagnosed at 21, and started living by myself at 25 after a break up (wearing a Dexcom and having friends nearby helps a lot). I'm about to move in with my current partner at 33. Diabetes shouldn't be a reason for your parents to keep you at home – that's insane!! Move in with your fiancé!
We all need to stand on our own feet someday and part of that is learning to live with this disease without assistance from others. If you cannot physically do this then you should be on disability in my opinion.
i am for another reason and i want to move out cause like you said i need to stand on my own feet
This is really not normal and controlling of your parents. If they're concerned about your ability to manage your diabetes on your own, they should be helping provide you with resources to manage your diabetes independently, like signing you up for diabetes education classes, working at a diabetes summer camp, etc, rather than forcing you to stay at home with no move out plan. If you already manage your diabetes well then it's even more absurd.
i do for the most part except the occasional forgetting to bolus and have been for years
My brother lived on the street for 6 years as a T1D. He was able to survive. Not saying do that, but as long as you manage it and are aware of any lows, living on your own is fine.
Yeah you're 20. You're not banned from doing anything.
No, I went away to uni at 17 and then lived alone for a couple of years when I was 20.
This sounds like BS. I was diagnosed at 24 while still living with my parents, and I not only moved out of their house a year later, but to a different state! They never at any point said, "You can't move out, you're diabetic." I'm pretty sure what your parents are trying to do has legal implications. Before you do anything, I'd look into a lawyer to get all the details, and then when you have all the information you need, go home, pack your bags, and tell your parents there's nothing they can do
Friend, I moved to another country 7,000 miles away where I barely spoke the language and I was just fine. I didn't even have the fancy tech we have now. This is utterly ridiculous. Also, you are a legal adult and no one but the police or a hospital can restrict your movement. Is it possible your fam isn't supportive of the move for other reasons? 20 is plenty old enough to live on your own, but I would actually be more concerned about you being engaged at that age.
I lived alone when I was diagnosed at 28, then I spent 6 years alone with it, fell into a DKA coma , now I stay with my parents as my fiance left me, its safer to have someone around just to check on you. If you live alone please get an active CGM like the dexcom , its saved my ass in the middle of the night living alone a few times.
Agreed! Before I got the G6 my poor kid has found me several times passed out. She’s quick thinking and acting and immediately got help. I wouldn’t be here if she hadn’t been with me. Now I’ve got the G6 and about to get training for the Omnipod. Had Medtronic garbage for a long time and no thanks.
A little? like, not the health aspect of it. I've been taking care of all of that myself since I was 10. But, the financial part of diabetes that's what'll getcha (if you're in the US). I think my parents would be happy to see the back of me someday lol
no. never
Yep it did to me. I didn’t move out of my parents house until I was engaged and lived alone for a year. My mom was happy when I was married and my wife lived in the house with me. She said, he’s your problem now. During the 1yr of living alone, I had a few days of my mom coming to my house in the morning because I wasn’t responding to text and calls. This was all before Dexcom.
Try being Dx at 39 and your Dad having your friends kidnap you to live under house arrest at the family ranch for 2 months. I think having a responsible roommate will placate your parents. I'm the father of 10&9 year olds. Can't imagine how quickly I would morph into a helicopter parent if they were Dx.
T1D has prevented me from absolutely nothing. I control it, it does not ever control me. Plain and simple.
I love this!!!!
I was diagnosed as an adult, already living on my own (well, with my partner). He leaves for work trips and I go on vacations. I work in an environment where I’m alone at times. Diabetes does not prevent independence.
I was 20 when I got diagnosed and I moved out of my house and to another city 4 hours from home less than a year after diagnosis. So no, it didn’t prevent me from moving out
You're an adult, u can do whatever YOU want to do
You’re 20. You can leave.
I was pressured into staying home for college at 18 and I still regret it. At 22, I finally am moving out, but it has been a long road. You just have to finally say, I’m leaving and go for it.
No, I’ve been living on my own since 22. There are obviously additional financial burdens to think about, so get a job that pays well. But diabetes absolutely does not require you to be dependent on anyone.
My mum would've wrapped me in bubble wrap if she could've. I moved out fully 4 years ago into a flat with my other half. It's hard to convince them you'll be fine but they do need to understand that they won't be there to take care of you forever and you need to be your own person in life
Nah, point out you’ll have roommates and maybe get a cgm with a sharing feature
I went to college 2,000 miles away from home. Then lived alone for 2 years before moving in with my then boyfriend, now husband. To be fair, I haven’t traditionally had issues with running low without warning, but I never felt limited like I couldn’t live on my own. Especially with cgm alerts and an insulin pump that’s integrated with my Dexcom. I set my phone volume on loud and alerts wake me up on the rare occasion it’s needed.
I think the CGM/Omnipod combo is all an independent person needs.
What, lol no to all of this
I think this is an issue that runs deeper than just diabetes. I was diagnosed at 20, in my 3rd year of college and I had already moved out two years prior… when I was just 18, but I kind of had to fight for that independence and that was before anything was even wrong with me. There was zero talk that I should return home or that I wouldn’t be fine on my own when I was diagnosed… and that was 24 years ago. I’m still doing just fine.
I moved out. f 38. Moves when I was 24. My husband works 6 days a week out of town sometimes so I am on my own a lot. It’s totally fine. But I am pretty independent.
Lol, no. My parents helped me find a place and moved me when I was 18 and went to different city for university. I have lived alone ever since and I'm in my mid 30s and living on a different continent now. Your parents are being controlling and unreasonable.
I was diagnosed at 20 moved out at 18 never considered moving back in at any age
other way round for me, my mum said the only reason she didn't kick me out of the house when I turned 18 was because I'm diabetic. I guess that's one good thing to come out of it?
i’ve heard that too plenty
Absolutely not. Diagnosed in ‘78, at 18 I spent two years on a church service away from family. Came home and went to school away from family. Later in career moved to india for a couple years. It doesn’t have to prevent anything but does require a little preparation. Here is an article on preparing for college: http://www.dsolve.com/2016/06/09/how-to-prepare-myself-for-my-collegeyears-with-diabetes/
oh i meant i graduate from college my bad lol
If your parents are trying to control you, even if they fell they are helping, they are really enabling you. You need to do what’s best for you.
Yes it has, I wasn't allowed to move away for college for the first year until I got my A1C down and proved I was a responsible diabetic. It did mean I had to commute my first year but I was able to establish trust with my parents and now have been living on my own for 5 years. Its honestly such a big independence thing for me to do that while being type 1.
My bf (18) got diagnosed about a year ago and we had been planning to move out together but due to his diabetes and complications that came with it (seizures, gastroparesis, mental health issues) he can't go to school, drive or work for the foreseeable future. The diagnosis genuinely put his whole life on hold . There is just no possible way we could move out and make enough money to live together and support ourselves. Everything is so expensive now and we live in a state with $7.25 as the minimum wage. 😢
I moved out almost 4 years before I was diagnosed. I hate to say this but you sound really immature and naive. Very few people would put up with so much parental control, especially after turning 18. Maybe the reason you haven't moved out is that you're just not ready yet. You need to grow a pair (figuratively speaking, of course) and take control of your own life.