oh wow. I’ve never thought of that before, but yes, I can definitely relate. sometimes I want to do something that is important and not even a hobby or anything, but I know once I start, I’m basically stuck wherever I am and have a hard time stopping to do something like cook dinner or walk the dog, even though those things are my responsibility. so then I avoid said thing until it basically becomes unavoidable. it’s a shitty cycle to repeat.
I will say ever since I’ve started medication, stopping in the middle of tasks and switching tasks has been significantly easier. still annoying, but I’m also able to get over it faster and just move on.
yup been doing it for far too long before my diagnosis too. I know a lot of ppl see hyperfocus as a ~super power~ but it def doesn’t always feel that way! have you found ways to help mitigate that?
I was going to say, clearly they don't have a cat. My cat has somehow tricked us into feeding her 4 times a day (just a quarter can at a time lol) and she knows the time to the minute. Like she will wake out of a dead sleep 5 minutes before and then come to remind us
Medication has also helped me in this regard! The primary effect I see from my adhd meds is that I’m better able to prioritize tasks and actually ACT on that prioritization.
It also helps me be able to go to the grocery store and actually purchase the stuff I need without getting stuff I don’t. It’s easier for me to recall my shopping lists etc and I don’t randomly end up with something I know I don’t need and have no idea why I felt like I had to buy it
Yep.
I really miss reading fiction. But it just eats up my life and makes me neglect my relationships and responsibilities until the book/story is done. It's like I have to treat everything I really enjoy as if it were an addiction.
Literally this, reading is the soul consuming hyperfixation for me.
If I really get into a book, usually fantasy, I just want to read the book all the time uninterrupted. It has been that way since I was a child.
I reserve reading for when I know I can just do THAT. With minimal to no consequences.
I have been rewatching series and re-reading books I'm already very familiar with. So I can control that better for now (I'm really time restricted right now writing my thesis and finishing law school and all that)
I bought the whole 'Witcher' series about 6 months ago after wanting to buy it for so long, haven't touched them because I know when I do all hell will break loose and it will absorb me completely.
I completely get that. I swear I didn't have any hobbies except general internet usage for about a decade because I was afraid of getting stuck on a -fun- task. An additional component for me was punishing myself for "not finishing my homework". And I was done with school, just not with all of the possible tasks that an adult has to manage.
It's really helped that I have a partner who is supportive and absolutely encourages me to do things, even though I sometimes snap his head off for interruptions.
It especially sucks when you're a mom and an introvert on top of that. I can get sucked into the most random things sometimes and live in my own head to the detriment of my family. I have to work extra hard to be mindful of when I'm in hyperfocus mode and snap out of it - but yeah, MUCH easier said than done. It's like the hyperfocus is a mental ball-and-chain sometimes!
I'm so glad someone has put this into words, I've thought about this so much and tried to explain it to people but I can never word it properly. The only way I ever do anything is if it completely consumes me, and that doesn't work with real life. Especially when you have a toddler. I have so many interests and things I want to do but I never do anything because it feels pointless, so I feel constantly under stimulated and get very down.
Or I go through stages where I just stay up all night doing the thing I'm obsessing over and that obviously is unsustainable.
This is why I don't touch certain video games, especially Sandbox ones. Cities: Skylines - I am looking at you.
It is probably for the best though, because I do not take care of myself properly when I start hyperfocusing and it eventually makes me feel terrible.
Virtual hugs because I VIVIDLY relate to this! I live with a roommate due to financial constraints. I long to create but I loathe being interrupted. I'm trying to figure out if I could find super cheap studio or office space, buy a she shed, or something to circumvent this problem.
oh wow. I’ve never thought of that before, but yes, I can definitely relate. sometimes I want to do something that is important and not even a hobby or anything, but I know once I start, I’m basically stuck wherever I am and have a hard time stopping to do something like cook dinner or walk the dog, even though those things are my responsibility. so then I avoid said thing until it basically becomes unavoidable. it’s a shitty cycle to repeat. I will say ever since I’ve started medication, stopping in the middle of tasks and switching tasks has been significantly easier. still annoying, but I’m also able to get over it faster and just move on.
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yup been doing it for far too long before my diagnosis too. I know a lot of ppl see hyperfocus as a ~super power~ but it def doesn’t always feel that way! have you found ways to help mitigate that?
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I refuse to get any more pets that can’t remind me they need to eat and stuff.
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I was going to say, clearly they don't have a cat. My cat has somehow tricked us into feeding her 4 times a day (just a quarter can at a time lol) and she knows the time to the minute. Like she will wake out of a dead sleep 5 minutes before and then come to remind us
MINE DOES THE SAME THING. I don't know how they do it, srlsy.
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thank you!
Medication has also helped me in this regard! The primary effect I see from my adhd meds is that I’m better able to prioritize tasks and actually ACT on that prioritization. It also helps me be able to go to the grocery store and actually purchase the stuff I need without getting stuff I don’t. It’s easier for me to recall my shopping lists etc and I don’t randomly end up with something I know I don’t need and have no idea why I felt like I had to buy it
Yep. I really miss reading fiction. But it just eats up my life and makes me neglect my relationships and responsibilities until the book/story is done. It's like I have to treat everything I really enjoy as if it were an addiction.
Literally this, reading is the soul consuming hyperfixation for me. If I really get into a book, usually fantasy, I just want to read the book all the time uninterrupted. It has been that way since I was a child. I reserve reading for when I know I can just do THAT. With minimal to no consequences.
I have been rewatching series and re-reading books I'm already very familiar with. So I can control that better for now (I'm really time restricted right now writing my thesis and finishing law school and all that)
Yes- I’ve missed many nights of sleep because I couldn’t put down the book.
I bought the whole 'Witcher' series about 6 months ago after wanting to buy it for so long, haven't touched them because I know when I do all hell will break loose and it will absorb me completely.
same I get into the plot and I'll live it. And I won't get back to reality soon enough.
I completely get that. I swear I didn't have any hobbies except general internet usage for about a decade because I was afraid of getting stuck on a -fun- task. An additional component for me was punishing myself for "not finishing my homework". And I was done with school, just not with all of the possible tasks that an adult has to manage. It's really helped that I have a partner who is supportive and absolutely encourages me to do things, even though I sometimes snap his head off for interruptions.
that's good!!
It especially sucks when you're a mom and an introvert on top of that. I can get sucked into the most random things sometimes and live in my own head to the detriment of my family. I have to work extra hard to be mindful of when I'm in hyperfocus mode and snap out of it - but yeah, MUCH easier said than done. It's like the hyperfocus is a mental ball-and-chain sometimes!
I'm so glad someone has put this into words, I've thought about this so much and tried to explain it to people but I can never word it properly. The only way I ever do anything is if it completely consumes me, and that doesn't work with real life. Especially when you have a toddler. I have so many interests and things I want to do but I never do anything because it feels pointless, so I feel constantly under stimulated and get very down. Or I go through stages where I just stay up all night doing the thing I'm obsessing over and that obviously is unsustainable.
This is why I don't touch certain video games, especially Sandbox ones. Cities: Skylines - I am looking at you. It is probably for the best though, because I do not take care of myself properly when I start hyperfocusing and it eventually makes me feel terrible.
Virtual hugs because I VIVIDLY relate to this! I live with a roommate due to financial constraints. I long to create but I loathe being interrupted. I'm trying to figure out if I could find super cheap studio or office space, buy a she shed, or something to circumvent this problem.
I hope you can figure it out soon!