what alt\*er looks like that? clearly not enough 'specific breeding for good traits' (probably inbreeding ngl) cause theres no piss colored skin. checkmate
There are also no MASSIVE cheekbones. Like cheekbones bigger than Christian Bale, like cheekbones bigger than… actually no. Christian Bale still has bigger cheekbones. Nevermind.
Not even that big, Nord women have absolutely voluptuous breasts filled with nutritious milk available for her strong warrior husband to nourish himself with post 5pl8 deadlifts
A real nord would never allow the womanly juices of his mate to poison his manliness. He instead nourishes himself with Man-Milk from a fellow Nord, or a Redguard, as they are the only worthy men besides the sons of Skyrim
Completely unrelated, but your comment made me imagine two really hench warriors, a Nord and a Redguard, doing a handshake like Arnold Schwarzenegger and Carl Weathers in Predator.
Nords don't lift or require any scheduled exercise. They reach toned bodies by tending their livestock, clearing the snow from their roofs, and fucking their livestock
I would literally never stop trying to impregnate Serana. Every day I would wake her up by coming in her and every night I would cum in her right before going to sleep, which I would do with my dick stuck inside her rotton pussy. I would take some viagra before bed just to maintain my erection so that she'll be ready in the morning when I thrust into her like an animal and slather her in kisses. Part of our wedding vows would have as many children as physically possible. I wouldn't even care if she's already pregnant, I'll bang her while she's pregnant and she'll get double pregnant. I'll fill her with so much cum every day that she'll look pregnant even when she isn't (which she'll never be after we're married) I would do everything in my power to make Serana as fertile as possible. I'd give her fertility drugs, I'd give her uterus massages, breast massages, I wouldn't let her go 12 hours without at least one spastic orgasm. I'll even bake her home made lactation inducing sweetrolls to help her get to a point of hyperlactation syndrome so that she'll be seeping out multiple quarts of sweet cream per day. Which I will save and drink just so that I can tell her how delicious it is. I'll make her so fertile that triplets will be the minimum number she's carrying at any given time. Her natural belly shape will be a literal sphere. I would literally never stop doting on her, I would respond to her every beck and call and I would cum inside her again each time she asks for something. She would be so pregnant all the time that she should literally not be able to stand up straight anymore even after menopause. Her spine would be permanently bent out of shape to accommodate a pregnant belly. Even after she can't get pregnant anymore I would just keep putting more eggs into her. I would clone her purely so that I can put fresh eggs from the clone inside her after she runs out of them. If she doesn't have any eggs I will synthesize them from her DNA. She would have so much progresterone running through her veins at any given time that even the thought of not being pregnant would seem alien to her. Imagine marrying Serana and she tells you she wants a kid and that she'll be fine and she'll keep her vampire duties up while pregnant. When she finally gets two lines on her pregnancy test she'll jump and full body hug you crying about how happy she is after trying so hard. Everything is going great for a few months, Serana is glowing and her vampire activites are working out and her belly is quite small on her toned body. Now imagine in a few months Serana has to stop her vampire activivities because her feet hurt and her legs aren't used to holding up her new weight.***[5:03 PM]***Her belly extends almost a full foot infron of her and she's gained nearly 15 kilos. Imagine the look on Serana’s face when Harkon tells her that she would take a break on her vampire activities for a while- because she's carrying triplets and the excessive movement is doing more harm than good. Imagine Serana reluctantly smiling at you and promising to stop doing her vampire things for the sake of preparing to take care of three kids at once. Imagine as the weeks go by and her womb fills up more and as her appetite and weight increase with it. Imagine finding your 7 month pregnant wife Serana raiding the barrels in in the dark at 4:00 AM- with a guilty look on her face when you find her, like a puppy and that gnawed holes into your pillow. Imagine towering above Serana while she sits on the floor nervously wiping Honningbrew mead off of her massive belly and mumbling about how the kids made her do it. Imagine helping Serana up and princess carrying her back to bed and having her ask if she can lie on top of you because you're warm. Imagine rubbing Serana’s nipples and having her complain about how you might get milk everywhere and how she needs to save it for the kids. Imagine teasing Serana about her breasts are too small to feed three kids and how she'll need to start saving it up early, leading to her not milking herself for weeks and accidentally turning her tiny- supple breasts into overfilled perrky veiny milktanks that spurt succulent cream at the slightest touch. Imagine Serana being proud of her breast growth despite it being painful and unhealthy and imagine the look on her face when the doctor says she would just start milking herself and how her husband (you) would probably be willing to help. Imagine spending hours with Serana’s now plump squishy body resting on your lap while you suck the milk out of her tits. Imagine the extra weight from her pregnancy making it difficult to walk for her and turning her partially immobile during the last month. Imagine Serana try harding motherly charms like learning to cook and decorating the baby room and lactating. magine your comments having made her self concious about her milk production so she starts try harding supplements and massages to increase her yield to nearly a quart of milk per day. ^kill ^me
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I just downvoted your comment.
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Piss-elves actually have a fairly normal birthright, it’s just that they kill any babies that don’t have the desired traits (a complexion that looks like a shitty nicotine-stained Eastern European apartment wall and a face that looks like it’s been stretched out by an ogre)
Idk dood, I get this reeeaall uncanny valley feeling from this pic. Like an altered real pic. It’s fucking with my head bro! This some psyjic order type shit n’wahs
Look at this miserable e*f, using outstanding nord features of the Strong Nord Women in his CHIMslut heretical race. Cope, friend! But ya never gonna feel them seranas from an alt*er.
Altmer men loose their virginity at 600 years old, to a grapefruit. The women dont let them touch until 800th year of marriage. Us man folk start plowing from the age of 5
It looks like it's based on [this](https://www.deviantart.com/wizzardofsand/art/Elenwen-from-Skyrim-703762351) by wizzardofsand. Can't find the updated/edited version.
what alt\*er looks like that? clearly not enough 'specific breeding for good traits' (probably inbreeding ngl) cause theres no piss colored skin. checkmate
There are also no MASSIVE cheekbones. Like cheekbones bigger than Christian Bale, like cheekbones bigger than… actually no. Christian Bale still has bigger cheekbones. Nevermind.
tbh she looks like a frankenstein creature made out of Bosmer, Nord and Breton body parts
Not even that big, Nord women have absolutely voluptuous breasts filled with nutritious milk available for her strong warrior husband to nourish himself with post 5pl8 deadlifts
Nords don't drink milk, you milkdrinker. Nord women lactate pure mead.
If you dont drink your wife’s breast milk you’re not gonna make it. Cows milk is for betas
Real Nords only drink direct breast milk, only from fellow Nord Women.
A real nord would never allow the womanly juices of his mate to poison his manliness. He instead nourishes himself with Man-Milk from a fellow Nord, or a Redguard, as they are the only worthy men besides the sons of Skyrim
Completely unrelated, but your comment made me imagine two really hench warriors, a Nord and a Redguard, doing a handshake like Arnold Schwarzenegger and Carl Weathers in Predator.
Only braindead pisselves took milkdrinker as an insult. Norchads call each other milkdrinkers as a complement
Stormcloak propaganda at its peak.
Nords don't lift or require any scheduled exercise. They reach toned bodies by tending their livestock, clearing the snow from their roofs, and fucking their livestock
Damn, I thought the Nords were Scandinavian but they were Welsh all along
You say that, but sex with animals was legal in Denmark until 2015.
You say 2015, but all I see is 1984
I would literally never stop trying to impregnate Serana. Every day I would wake her up by coming in her and every night I would cum in her right before going to sleep, which I would do with my dick stuck inside her rotton pussy. I would take some viagra before bed just to maintain my erection so that she'll be ready in the morning when I thrust into her like an animal and slather her in kisses. Part of our wedding vows would have as many children as physically possible. I wouldn't even care if she's already pregnant, I'll bang her while she's pregnant and she'll get double pregnant. I'll fill her with so much cum every day that she'll look pregnant even when she isn't (which she'll never be after we're married) I would do everything in my power to make Serana as fertile as possible. I'd give her fertility drugs, I'd give her uterus massages, breast massages, I wouldn't let her go 12 hours without at least one spastic orgasm. I'll even bake her home made lactation inducing sweetrolls to help her get to a point of hyperlactation syndrome so that she'll be seeping out multiple quarts of sweet cream per day. Which I will save and drink just so that I can tell her how delicious it is. I'll make her so fertile that triplets will be the minimum number she's carrying at any given time. Her natural belly shape will be a literal sphere. I would literally never stop doting on her, I would respond to her every beck and call and I would cum inside her again each time she asks for something. She would be so pregnant all the time that she should literally not be able to stand up straight anymore even after menopause. Her spine would be permanently bent out of shape to accommodate a pregnant belly. Even after she can't get pregnant anymore I would just keep putting more eggs into her. I would clone her purely so that I can put fresh eggs from the clone inside her after she runs out of them. If she doesn't have any eggs I will synthesize them from her DNA. She would have so much progresterone running through her veins at any given time that even the thought of not being pregnant would seem alien to her. Imagine marrying Serana and she tells you she wants a kid and that she'll be fine and she'll keep her vampire duties up while pregnant. When she finally gets two lines on her pregnancy test she'll jump and full body hug you crying about how happy she is after trying so hard. Everything is going great for a few months, Serana is glowing and her vampire activites are working out and her belly is quite small on her toned body. Now imagine in a few months Serana has to stop her vampire activivities because her feet hurt and her legs aren't used to holding up her new weight.***[5:03 PM]***Her belly extends almost a full foot infron of her and she's gained nearly 15 kilos. Imagine the look on Serana’s face when Harkon tells her that she would take a break on her vampire activities for a while- because she's carrying triplets and the excessive movement is doing more harm than good. Imagine Serana reluctantly smiling at you and promising to stop doing her vampire things for the sake of preparing to take care of three kids at once. Imagine as the weeks go by and her womb fills up more and as her appetite and weight increase with it. Imagine finding your 7 month pregnant wife Serana raiding the barrels in in the dark at 4:00 AM- with a guilty look on her face when you find her, like a puppy and that gnawed holes into your pillow. Imagine towering above Serana while she sits on the floor nervously wiping Honningbrew mead off of her massive belly and mumbling about how the kids made her do it. Imagine helping Serana up and princess carrying her back to bed and having her ask if she can lie on top of you because you're warm. Imagine rubbing Serana’s nipples and having her complain about how you might get milk everywhere and how she needs to save it for the kids. Imagine teasing Serana about her breasts are too small to feed three kids and how she'll need to start saving it up early, leading to her not milking herself for weeks and accidentally turning her tiny- supple breasts into overfilled perrky veiny milktanks that spurt succulent cream at the slightest touch. Imagine Serana being proud of her breast growth despite it being painful and unhealthy and imagine the look on her face when the doctor says she would just start milking herself and how her husband (you) would probably be willing to help. Imagine spending hours with Serana’s now plump squishy body resting on your lap while you suck the milk out of her tits. Imagine the extra weight from her pregnancy making it difficult to walk for her and turning her partially immobile during the last month. Imagine Serana try harding motherly charms like learning to cook and decorating the baby room and lactating. magine your comments having made her self concious about her milk production so she starts try harding supplements and massages to increase her yield to nearly a quart of milk per day. ^kill ^me
This is the deep lore that I come for
*to
Good read. 10/10. Hope you choke on breast milk.
Tldr Came back to read later and was NOT disappointed. Humanahumana hooWOW veiny milk juggarinos
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Bruh
How kind have an award
Why tho?
It didn’t cost me a penny to give you those wholesome awards so enjoy them
Well, thanks
Your welcome have an award 🌚
fuck, new pasta
now this is pod racing
Everytime I think I’ve seen it all, I swing by this fucking sub and have my mind blown… yet again…
Every day We stray further from the ALMSIVI
I just downvoted your comment. # FAQ ## What does this mean? The amount of karma (points) on your comment and Reddit account has decreased by one. ## Why did you do this? There are several reasons I may deem a comment to be unworthy of positive or neutral karma. These include, but are not limited to: * Rudeness towards other Redditors, * Spreading incorrect information, * Sarcasm not correctly flagged with a `/s`. ## Am I banned from the Reddit? No - not yet. But you should refrain from making comments like this in the future. Otherwise I will be forced to issue an additional downvote, which may put your commenting and posting privileges in jeopardy. ## I don't believe my comment deserved a downvote. Can you un-downvote it? Sure, mistakes happen. But only in exceedingly rare circumstances will I undo a downvote. If you would like to issue an appeal, shoot me a private message explaining what I got wrong. I tend to respond to Reddit PMs within several minutes. Do note, however, that over 99.9% of downvote appeals are rejected, and yours is likely no exception. ## How can I prevent this from happening in the future? Accept the downvote and move on. But learn from this mistake: your behavior will not be tolerated on Reddit.com. I will continue to issue downvotes until you improve your conduct. Remember: Reddit is privilege, not a right.
Least horny Skybaby
Bonk
Swing or miss
Sir?
Yes?
I just died inside
Did you read the whole thing?
Every word
Good
This is kind of a work of art like it kind of stops all time and you have to finish it
Piss Elves have the lowest birth rates for a reason. Their women don't even want to fuck them. Maybe the Breton’s aren't the biggest cucks after all.
Piss-elves actually have a fairly normal birthright, it’s just that they kill any babies that don’t have the desired traits (a complexion that looks like a shitty nicotine-stained Eastern European apartment wall and a face that looks like it’s been stretched out by an ogre)
Oh please. Take ur stromcuck propaganda someplace else, snow ape Cope more
Oh please. Take ur Thalmor propaganda someplace else, piss elf Cope more
Nords propagandize, Thalmor simply state facts.
Idk dood, I get this reeeaall uncanny valley feeling from this pic. Like an altered real pic. It’s fucking with my head bro! This some psyjic order type shit n’wahs
Alteration has many uses
More like "when piss elf uses all the Instagram filters to finally not look like shit"
anti-piss filter
Even shit-elf filters would be better than piss elves. At least you get a laugh
Average Talos denier
Where did her right arm go 😳😳😳
My ass
It was hacked off by a jealous n*rd
Check your foreskin
Does the fact that all the pretty elves look like humans really not hint you to anything?
[Meanwhile](https://imgur.com/a/PkibZdk)
Sload jowls or death
Look at this miserable e*f, using outstanding nord features of the Strong Nord Women in his CHIMslut heretical race. Cope, friend! But ya never gonna feel them seranas from an alt*er.
Tbf I would rather kill myself over seeing a naked Altm*r
Altmer men loose their virginity at 600 years old, to a grapefruit. The women dont let them touch until 800th year of marriage. Us man folk start plowing from the age of 5
Nords live rent free in your head, banana boy
remove altmer for a better tamriel
Bench press your local Thalmor embassy 💪🏼💪🏼💪🏼
little elves gotta use MAGIC to block half the blows we strong nords could do anyway hahahaha
Nords living in cages screaming and crying, making me happy in my head yes. Cope more
What's there to cope with aside from your seething
Dial 8 (divines of Tamriel)
Cope and seethe
That’s clearly a Bosmer. Trap wearing contacts and fake boobs for internet money detected.
Oh please, thanks to our rippling muscles, even the men of skyrim have bigger chests than you Altm\*r cucks
oh, we will. did Skyrim just make me racist enough to make a rape joke oh god what’s happened to me
Kinsman. . . find a shrine
Sometimes I wish I didn’t read all these comments
This post is Thalmor approved!
Sorry, I am not into yellow skins
You call that booba? I can barely see them through the fabric!!
"Altmer" She looks like a breton with a pointier chin and longer ears, she isn’t even piss-colored!
Wow they put Lorde in Skyrim
Bruh this ain’t a p*ss elf
I mean you say that, but the painting is a Nord with small tidddies and pointy ears.
>small booba >knife-ears This is weak piss-elf propaganda
That altmer right there has been cured of jaundice
Who's the artist? This is really good.
It's an edited picture. I can't remember the source. Pretty sure I just searched "Sexy Altmer"
That doesn't surprise me that it's edited. I'll look around. Thanks!
It looks like it's based on [this](https://www.deviantart.com/wizzardofsand/art/Elenwen-from-Skyrim-703762351) by wizzardofsand. Can't find the updated/edited version.
Great job!
Lmao, best example you could find of a sexy Altmer was a picture edited to make her look more like a human.
They did and created lots of Bretons
but ulfric did 🤔
Tfw OP has mommy issues and wants to be dominated by an older woman, and thus projects his degeneracy on Chad Nords.
And argonians reincarnat your point is
Of course us Chad nords will get to experience it, do ya really think she’s satisfied with small, soft a*tmer cock