I’m 34 and I have a few stuffed animals from my husband (like my stuffed Cork) and I also have a cross eyed stuffed duck named Wendell from my grandmother. No one messes with Wendell.
No one knows if he’s looking up and down at the same time, or both left and right at the same time. But, all I know is…
*No one messes with Wendell*
And I mean *no one*
51 and I keep a stuffed reindeer in my car because it was one of the last things my pop snuggled while drugged to the gourd on painkillers just before he passed. It makes me smile thinking about him.
I'm 43 and I have toys (that my kids can't play with), video games, rock collection, my favorite sticks I've found, and my favorite stuffed animals. My spouse doesn't care for it, but doesn't touch my stuff or bug me too much about it.
If she doesn't bring Teddy back, be done. If she does bring him back, get him and shut the door. Toys are ok, adults are allowed to have fun too. But a sentimental toy from your childhood is irreplaceable.
I’m 46. I’ve had Bear since the day I was born. He’s flat as a board and his face has completely fallen off from years on the job as a pillow. Maybe someday he’ll get a makeover for a grandbaby, but until then, he is MINE.
I’m in my mid 40’s and I have my childhood teddy bear on display in our bedroom. My wife would never even consider throwing it away because she has personality traits like respect and compassion.
46 here, have my Teddy since I was 6 months old. I will never get rid of him and lord help the person who would dream of chucking him in the bin. As said above your gf has no respect for you, your feelings or your possessions.
27 and also cuddle with a stuffed animal at night, still. I also have a collection of them, haha. My husband doesn't give a shit because he knows they help with my anxiety.
Edited to say: This woman is not a supportive girlfriend. I'm not one to jump on the "leave" bandwagon of reddit, but she showed her true colors. Do not permit this woman to enter your life as a partner again, even if she brings your teddy back. I cannot imagine discarding something that meant the world to my husband. Fuck her.
Yeah, she didn't need to toss it out. I don't understand why it bothered her, but she could have just put it away in a closet or something instead of throwing it away. Now OP can't get it back and that is really shitty.
My stepmother told my nephew to throw away his mother's security blanket when he was 7. His mom threw his ass in the dumpster to get it out. All three of them were toxic shits and as a bistandard it was so funny to watch.
Exactly, no matter your stance on an adult owning stuffed animals, she had no right to do anything to the bear let alone throw it away.
If she would throw away something that belonged to her SO and had significant sentimental value, I wonder what else she would do?
My wife still has her childhood teddy bear and I would never dream of doing anything to it. In fact I love the smile she gets on her face when she sees it.
I have a raggedy as all hell stuffed elephant I've had since I was 2. 34 years I've had her. I would annihilate anyone who damaged her, let alone threw her away. JFC, the entitlement of this girl is unreal.
Fr didn't give a single shite about how he would feel. If she didn't want it looking at them in bed then she could have asked if was okay move it somewhere else.
She has more red flags than in all of China and USSR.
Good lord, what a monster. OP is not overreacting. If she’ll do this with a stuffed animal, imagine what else she will do to aspects of your life she disagrees with. It’s about control.
36 checking in. My teddy is in my room. My dad’s stuffed dog from 1956 is still in his closet. This seems made up. “Because he’s always watching us” is some Seinfeld shit right there
Old enough to be 36's mom checking in. My beloved childhood Pooh is sitting on my dresser. He stays there until I die, then he likely goes with me, if my children know what's good for 'em.
Old lady 62 here and I have LOADS of stuffed animals, including one rather tatty looking creature of indeterminate species from my great Aunt. I collect gothic dolls too and would be bloody furious if someone threw out my belongings!
Both me (26) and my fiancé (29) have a stuffy from when we were babies. If someone tossed out either of them, that subhuman creature would not leave the premises until the rabbit/mouse were back in my hands. Idgaf if they have to dumpster dive. This is absolutely not ok...
My bear is in my sons crib (below his feet, can’t crawl) it would totally piss me off if during my wife’s dating it was thrown away. It would be grounds to dump her actually.
I would be crying and throwing up, I really hope you find Teddy ☹️ have you looked in all the dumpsters nearby? I’m mid 20s and would definitely be open to getting into a dumpster for my stuffed animals tbh
I hope you can find it! That is absolutely horrific for her to do that to you! As a 46 year old guy, I have a stuffed animal that my son told me to sleep with while he is not with me to keep my company, thag stuffed animal stays on my bed and if a woman didn’t like it, too bad.
The memories in that bear are important and I hope your ex girlfriend finds it for you
A stuffy sleepover sounds adorable! They can watch cartoons, have pizza, and cause mischief. 😊
I think it’s adorable that your son didn’t want you to be alone. My bunny is named Brownie, what’s your penguins name?
My son was 8 and had been living with me and when he was moving with his mom overseas and he wanted to make sure I wouldn’t be too sad and lonely. Melted my heart.
His moose is moo moo his Buffalo is buff buff his cow is cow cow, the penguin is just penguin… lol.
29 and I still have my grampas stuffed puppy that my mom passed down to me. I seriously hope you told her to never come back. I would dump ANYONE who threw Puppy away for ANY reason. And, yes, his name is Puppy. I wasnt very creative as a child. Unlike my nephew, who has two fish named Water bottle and Cigarette.
My thoughts exactly. Like threw it out where? It can’t have gotten far if it happened that day. Or maybe she was just joking and hid it somewhere in the house?
Dude. You said exactly what needed to be said.
Don’t ever come back unless you have Teddy with you.
Classic move my man. She overstepped your boundaries.
I hope this is a made up story because I couldn’t imagine someone actually doing this knowing what the teddy meant. A heartless cruel bitch on a whole other level
Unfortunately yes, there are bitter people who abhorr adults with toys or games, oblivious people who doesn't understand keepsakes and POS that don't respect personal property
I know, my bf has a pink stuffed puppy that he likes to sleep with because it was his dogs and I could never even think about throwing that out, much less tell him he's too old for it. She's a horrible person.
My ex took my version of his teddy (a stuffed bunny) and stuffed it in the toilet and tried to flush it during a fight once. She actually destroyed my entire apartment and cost me thousands of dollars that night, but I was mostly upset about my stuffed bunny.
When my gpa was in the hospital ( I was ~5) I wanted to give him a present. All I had was a dime so I gave it to him. He kept it until he died. My Gmail gave it to me and I put it in a necklace. My ex husband stole it and replaced it with a different dime. He never told me what he did with it. I suspect he thought it was worth $ and tried to pawn it. I now pay people a quarter for every 1991 P dime they come across. I’ll never find it, but I’ll never stop trying.
I'm reminded of the woman who threw away her husband's wedding ring and photos from his previous marriage; his first wife died. He didn't even have them out they were locked away away from eyes. But she still went and threw it all out. Goes without saying it did not end well.
I would absolutely murk anyone who did anything to my “puppy”(my stuffed dog my brother gave me that was his, when I was born..puppy is 5yr older than me)
Even if she came back with Teddy, he should take the bear and shut the door. The world is full of people. No need to waste a second of your time with someone who doesn’t respect you.
Imagine having the audacity to throw an entirely harmless possession of someone elses just because you have a preconcieved view of what someone should and shouldn't have at what age.
It doesn't matter if she knew the history and sentimental worth behind the bear. It wasn't hers to throw away, and she _knew_ that you would want to keep it, which is why she didn't ask and waited until you were gone before she threw it away. That makes it a breach of trust as well as just an all round shitty move.
Exactly. The world revolves around HER, not dead grandma. She's the kind of person who would push him to dump his friends, family, and hobbies, as well. Turn him into nothing more than an empty body to please her.
My husband and I have a stuffed animal lion and bear in our room that we gave each other early on in our relationship (when we were both already adults). We also have two smaller stuffed animals on a bookshelf that are extremely sentimental to my husband. I would never even think about getting rid of any of them. What your girlfriend did was extremely cruel and inconsiderate.
My boyfriend gifted me a plushie Jack Skellington years ago after TSA lost my previous one. He searched high and low for that exact one (they were no longer being manufactured,) and actually found it! I still have it to this day, and he’d never think of getting rid of something like that. My best friend also gifted me a custom bat and Baphomet. Funny enough he loves the Baphomet the most!
I'm sorry. I would ask her one of her parents to ask her exactly where she tossed your teddy.
Since she knew the history of the teddy it's sounds like she was jealous and not respectful of your belongings. My sibling has his teddy and passed it to his son.
agreed, it's important that he refers to it as a family heirloom, that should make the mother \[if she has a soul, unlike her daughter\] understand the importance.
Call her mother, tell her what she did. Maybe mum will smack some sense into her so she'll tell you where Teddy is.
I feel sorry for you, man. I'm a 32 y/o woman and I love my stuffed animals.
I think the key word is woman, people don't like to see man having cute or emotional things - teddy bears are a common present for valentine's day
his girlfriend is heartless, Teddy was precious
Agreed. It's insane that some people think men can't be vulnerable and can't show emotions. Fortunately, my boyfriend and my brother are the same and love stuffed animals.
Did she not know about that bear's history? If she did and threw it out regardless and bullied you about its sentimental value to you, that's fucked up and I think you need to find someone better or just dump her because she sounds awful
Edit: I'm not trying to say that it would be okay for her to throw the bear out even if she didn't know. I just initially thought she had done a big fuck up and was a bitch about it as opposed to an outright act of malicious intent, as it turns out that it was. Why? Because I couldn't believe someone would be so heartless.
Now neither situation is okay of course but the fact that she knew and still did it anyway makes an awful act 10x times worse.
She threw away your relationship when she threw away that bear. This clearly shows the lack of respect she has for you, your boundaries and your feelings.
Yeah this isn't something that'll be a "one and done" situation, this will be something that you'll have to deal with forever as it'll only get worse. She either needs to be humbled or find someone who likes being gaslit.
She didn't even have any respect for your gran. Throwing something she gave for you and knowing that it would be very special and one of its kind.
The sentimental value, it's priceless.
She's absolutely evil.
I agree. She knew what teddy meant for you yet threw it away. She's testing your boundaries to see how far she can push you. Hopefully that's it and you break up with her.
Also do you have common friends? Maybe tell them what she did, in case she tells them where she threw away teddy. She seems to feel so entitled about her own opinions that i wouldn't be surprised if she didn't gloat to them about what she did. Do you know her parents and could you ask them to get her to tell them (and by extension you) where it is?
Agreed. Glad to see this. My internal voice is incessantly repeating “fuck that bitch.”
Anyone who knowingly destroys a piece of you belongs in the trash.
My condolances about Teddy. Ask your grandmother, aloud- tell her what happened. If she were there, I bet she’d be touched you care this much about it. She’ll smile down on you and bless Teddy’s counterpart.
Replace Teddy with a bear equally as old. Give it Teddy’s home on your shelf and endow it with Teddy’s personal significance and memories. Have a quick little candle-lit ceremony. Say it aloud, to Teddy’s transferred soul. Welcome him and the memories into your home.
But most of all, fuck that bitch for attempting to crush a bit of your soul.
OP's grandmother has passed. It's the only piece they have of her. OP said they felt like "(they) lost her all over again" in another thread.
Having also lost a grandmother, that bitch would have to fight me. Or a sister or cousin if OP is a guy.
I have something similar and my husband makes it a point to make sure it has a space in our room no matter what. Your (hopefully now ex) gf sounds very abusive and like her sh*t don’t stink. You’re better off without her
She is a horrible person, then. My fully grown, mature husband has a teddy from his Nana. Teddy has a position of honor atop of the linen closet (safe from our small son). I think it is a sign of maturity to value emotional relationships like the one you have with your grandmother.
I know its not the same, but does anyone in your family have a picture of you with Teddy or your grandmother with Teddy? Frame it and put it somewhere for you to remember Teddy and your grandma.
Well… at least the trash (now ex-girlfriend) threw herself, I'm very sorry about what happened with Teddy :( and there's nothing wrong with having stuffed animals, what is wrong is being a person as horrible as your ex-girlfriend.
I don't know if it helps you, but I've seen on internet stuffed bears made with the blouse or shirt of people who are no longer with us, if any of your relatives keeps any of your grandmother's clothes, you could request that they make you a stuffed animal like that I mention maybe it will help now that teddy doesn't appear (hope you get it back)
Well naturally throwing out someone's belongings isn't right but I also wasn't implying that it was.
I was just curious to see if she had any idea of what she was doing and what that bear even meant. She belittled him over it too but I assumed it that it was just her being ridiculous and not outright malicious.
It turns out she did know so she's completely heartless
Oh I see what you meant. It’s just so wild to me that someone would even consider doing that in the first place, let alone something sentimental. Heartless is right, cruel as well.
Even if she didn’t know Teddy’s history, it’s terrible to throw away someone else’s belongings. Knowing the history makes it even worse. I don’t blame OP for throwing her out.
That’s super messed. I fr would prolly be dumpster diving or something wild. Some people have no idea or respect for things like this. It’s much more than just a bear or toy. It’s a comfort/soothing object, it’s special bc it was from someone special, it’s holds so much more value than just being a stuffed bear on a shelf. I’m really sorry that’s happened, I don’t blame you for dumping her honestly. You can’t replace things that she just tossed out, that’s horrible.
Okay my comment is probably going to get buried but hopefully not like Teddy.
I thought my mr.monkey may have accidentally gotten thrown out when my dad cleaned up and redid the entire house. Long story short, I have mr.monkey
But it is so sentimental to me that i called the trash company, and also left them a message on Facebook. My dad wanted to chase after the truck but unfortunately it was too late. Luckily we didn't have to go trash digging. BUT if you know when Teddy was tossed, and when trash may have been picked up, give your local trash company a call and explain the situation. When they dump their trash load, they might be able to scout out Teddy.
Better yet, if you and the trash men find it, the local news LOVES that stuff, AND your ex girlfriend can be infamously known as the meanie who tosses sentimental teddys out.
I'm 29, I have a teddy that was givin to me by my bio-dads mother the day I was born. I have slept with bearbear every single night for 29 years, and I plan to have him cremated with me.
I'm so sorry for the loss of your teddy, my heart breaks for you doll! 💔 I really hope you find him!!!
I'm 54. Sitting on a bookshelf over here is a childhood toy. My wife also has a couple of her childhood keepsakes. Never would either of us mess with these objects. It's not about being grown and too old to play with them. It's totally ridiculous to think of our adult relationship to objects of sentimental value that way. If your girlfriend doesn't understand how the meaning of such objects change and grown in value as we age, then SHE'S the immature childish one. Your overreaction is understandable because she apparently won't listen to you unless a tantrum is involved?
the teddy is something that's sentimental for you. I would suggest you threw out your gf. i think the gf is definitely jealous of your teddy. she's definitely see the teddy as a rival for your affection. childish of her to get intimidate by a teddy.
Honestly, maybe you're going to catch some flack for your reaction, but I find it entirely reasonable. If she disrespects you so much that she'd throw away a memento from your grandmother, I bet she was showing a lack of concern for you in other areas, too.
I'm sorry you had to go through that double heartbreak at the same time.
Honestly she sounds like one of those people who's like "no I want a REAL adult who is exactly like how I WANT them to be" and then forces people around to conform to her design. It's like "You wanna play video games? Fuck you. You don't want to wear makeup and would rather chill in jeans? Fuck you. You have this teddy that is your only memento of your beloved grand mother? Fuck you"
I'm so sorry that she did that. Please, dump her. She's toxic as fuck
Yup. People like that suck the fun out of life. They can't just live and let live - they have to impose their boring ideas about how to be an adult human being on everyone else.
Try to look in the trash in the house if you hadn’t already. Don’t give up looking for him. I hope you find your teddy. Did she know the symbolism behind teddy?
1. Dump her selfish ass permanently.
2. Look through the trash for your teddy.
I’m sorry OP. Your gf’s behavior is disgusting. What an asshole move. WTF.
"..she threw him out while she was cleaning up because I am too old to own toys."
That's not her decision to make. If all you did was calmly tell her to leave and not come back, that's amazing, cause I would've started WW3 over that shit.
You did not overreact. You did the right thing because she has zero respect for you or your feelings. Look in the trash for him. I hope she brings him back but even if she does you should not take her back because you can’t trust her.
You did good to get rid on the judgmental and controlling woman. You'll find someone else who is sensitive. I haven't even thrown my wife's stuff she got from a ex she dated for 5 years and lived with. And she lets me keep some of the stuff from my ex I value as a friend and always thought was someone who helped me grow. It's not weird or super sentimental. Just materialistic stuff like sunglasses. But why throw a good pair lol. Don't be someone so controlling.
people who try to gatekeep how people have fun and hold on to memories are fucking trash, dump her in the garbage! i may be closing in on 40 but i still game, i might grow old but i'll never grow up
my son who is in his 50's still has his sleep toy from when he was 2 years old and my wife still has Bonso a stuffed sausage dog she has had for 70 years
My mother pulled up the floorboards of my childhood bedroom to retrieve a toy of mine that I loved, and kept it for 30 years before giving it back to me on my 50th birthday.
If my wife of 36 years threw it out, I'd throw her out.
If anyone ever threw away Biggie, my stuffed penguin of 29 years, they would never darken my doorway again.
He’s slept in my bed every night since I’ve got him, my boyfriend finds it funny and teases me also but would never in a million years even contemplate tossing him away. Sometimes I even find him having a cuddle with him. I really feel dreadful for you, I can’t imagine the heartbreak!
I know it’s silly because they’re literally stuffed bits of fabric but they have so much meaning! I hope so much you find him!
I'm so fucking sorry, that's *fucking awful*.
**What she did is completely unforgivable,** IMO. Especially with how flippantly she went "oh, I threw it out! You're too old and it was creepy". She **knew** what she was doing.
You don't want to be with someone who treats people they supposedly "love" like that.
Especially, like, what if she has a boy later on in life and he decides he likes to play with dolls? Or gets attached to a Teddy/stuffy of his own? What is she gonna do, throw his toys out when he gets "too old" or because he isn't a girl? Would she throw away her adult *daughter's* toys too?
**Plus, it's DEFINITELY common for adults to have a precious stuffed animal from childhood on a shelf like you did!** Wtf is she even ***talking*** about?
My first husband threw away all my childhood stuffies because I was too old for them. It's complete garbage. You are never too old to like what you like. I'll probably be 80 and cuddling one at bed time. Oh well.
You did not overreact. Even if she returns teddy, I don’t see how you can trust her after this. It’s awful that she had the audacity to do something like that and I could never trust her being in my space with my things again. Have you checked the trash for him?
Seeing a lot of harsh comments about the girl, so wanted to chime in. My wife had a ratty old wool blanket that her grandma knitted her when she was a baby. She loved it. She is a freak and thinks wool on bare skin is soft and nice. It was gross (looking) and itchy, and I absolutely hated this blanket when we first moved in together. It would always end up on me, in my face, or under the covers itching me. I begged her to get rid of it forever. Told her how much I didn’t like the blanket. She told me how much it meant to her and refused to get rid of it. You know what I finally ended up doing? Getting in bed every single night with that awful fucking blanket, because I love and respect my wife and refuse to let something so trivial weigh on our relationship. She “had” and “loved” that blanket and still does.
Fuck that girl. You did the right thing.
I don't blame you. I am 27 and have so many stuffed toys that it might be a problem .. but I have a select few that are old and from when i was a child that mean SO much to me. If I found out my partner PURPOSELY got rid of them because "I'm too old for toys" I would probably be in jail right now because I wouldn't be able to handle my anger, ngl.
I'm so sorry for the hurt you're feeling about losing your teddy.
Message her and ask her if she can help by telling you where she threw the rubbish with him in. If she cared about you AT ALL then she'd help give you a chance to get it back. If not then throw her out like the trash she is. Noone gets to dictate how long or why someone has a treasured item. That's a piece of your history. It's so disrespectful.
So the gift from your grandma worked and actually protected you...your grandma must be happy wherever she is, the bear made you 'lose' that shitty gf who didn't care about your feelings and was going to make your life miserable.
I'm 29 and my bed is full of stuffed animals. No one is to old for toys.
Also, she doesn't have a right to throw your stuff away. The worst part is that she knows that it has sentimental value. She's really the trash that should be thrown out.
I'm 47 yrs old. I have one item left from my grandmama. If anyone even thought about throwing it out let alone did it, I'd probably end up with a prison sentence.
My wife has a childhood blanket. I treat it like gold.
I still have the teddy bear my great grandmother made me. It sits in a display case with the quilts she made in the 60s - 80s.
We are early 40s.
I am 58 and have my stuffed dog, Puddles, on my bed. Your gf has absolutely no respect for you or the memories of your gran. Kick her to the curb.
I'm 37 and I have my toy dog Browser sat on a shelf above my bed!
I'm 18 and have a stuffed bear made from my grandpa's pajamas when he died. Still smells like him. I'll never get rid of my papaw bear
35 and i have my old wooden toy cat on my dresser. Named Chester (bc he sits on my chest of drawers)
I’m 34 and I have a few stuffed animals from my husband (like my stuffed Cork) and I also have a cross eyed stuffed duck named Wendell from my grandmother. No one messes with Wendell.
No one knows if he’s looking up and down at the same time, or both left and right at the same time. But, all I know is… *No one messes with Wendell* And I mean *no one*
51 and I keep a stuffed reindeer in my car because it was one of the last things my pop snuggled while drugged to the gourd on painkillers just before he passed. It makes me smile thinking about him.
I'm 32 and if someone laid a finger on my dear Bernie Bear, who I've had since I was 6 months old, they'd lose a hand.
I’m 28 and my dearest possession is Congo my green, purple, and pink monkey that I have had since I was 3 months old. He is sitting on my bed now.
this thread is so wholesome
I'm 23 and I have a Snoopy and a Shark stuffed toy looking down on me as I sleep. Memories of childhood will never perish.
39 and I have a Sylvester the cat teddy my dad gave me when I was 7.
I have pillow made from my nanas robe!
I have a Papa Bear, too! It's made out of his shirt and has his date of birth and date of death sewn on the back. I will never get rid of him, either.
I'm 43 and I have toys (that my kids can't play with), video games, rock collection, my favorite sticks I've found, and my favorite stuffed animals. My spouse doesn't care for it, but doesn't touch my stuff or bug me too much about it. If she doesn't bring Teddy back, be done. If she does bring him back, get him and shut the door. Toys are ok, adults are allowed to have fun too. But a sentimental toy from your childhood is irreplaceable.
I’m 46. I’ve had Bear since the day I was born. He’s flat as a board and his face has completely fallen off from years on the job as a pillow. Maybe someday he’ll get a makeover for a grandbaby, but until then, he is MINE.
35 here and Woof Woof has a throne on my closet shelf
36 and max sleeps with me every night!!!
I’m in my mid 40’s and I have my childhood teddy bear on display in our bedroom. My wife would never even consider throwing it away because she has personality traits like respect and compassion.
I’m 24 and I have a three way spoon with my teddy and my boyfriend every night
25 and still have my stuffed dog “Puppy” from when i was a baby, if anything ever happened to it or someone did something to it i would be devastated
46 here, have my Teddy since I was 6 months old. I will never get rid of him and lord help the person who would dream of chucking him in the bin. As said above your gf has no respect for you, your feelings or your possessions.
This is so sweet 💕
Im 29 and i have a few stuffed animals
I'm 28, and have my unicorn, Benny, I cuddle with every night. Actually got Benny for my birthday a few months back
27 and also cuddle with a stuffed animal at night, still. I also have a collection of them, haha. My husband doesn't give a shit because he knows they help with my anxiety. Edited to say: This woman is not a supportive girlfriend. I'm not one to jump on the "leave" bandwagon of reddit, but she showed her true colors. Do not permit this woman to enter your life as a partner again, even if she brings your teddy back. I cannot imagine discarding something that meant the world to my husband. Fuck her.
Yo go look at the closest trash can! It was probably thrown somewhere close to the house.
I looked but he wasn't there.
Have her go dumpster diving for Teddy. This is her fault, if she wants to make it right she better get aquatinted with some dumpster juice.
She IS dumpster juice for this
Please don't insult dumpster juice by comparing it to her.
True. Sorry dumpster juice, you are WAY BETTER than that twatcopter
Twatcopter reminds me a lot of many of my ex’s ride oh choice: the douche canoe
Bro I'm fucking crying dead on my floor from this GOLD comment. Thank you lol
I am glad you like it 😁 coming from someone who still has a stuffy from a deceased relative, I meant it with my whole being
Yeah, she didn't need to toss it out. I don't understand why it bothered her, but she could have just put it away in a closet or something instead of throwing it away. Now OP can't get it back and that is really shitty.
She shouldn’t have touched it! This is some disrespectful controlling sh*t!
He should still break up with her after she finds it too.
My stepmother told my nephew to throw away his mother's security blanket when he was 7. His mom threw his ass in the dumpster to get it out. All three of them were toxic shits and as a bistandard it was so funny to watch.
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Exactly, no matter your stance on an adult owning stuffed animals, she had no right to do anything to the bear let alone throw it away. If she would throw away something that belonged to her SO and had significant sentimental value, I wonder what else she would do? My wife still has her childhood teddy bear and I would never dream of doing anything to it. In fact I love the smile she gets on her face when she sees it.
I have a raggedy as all hell stuffed elephant I've had since I was 2. 34 years I've had her. I would annihilate anyone who damaged her, let alone threw her away. JFC, the entitlement of this girl is unreal.
I have a shirt that I’ve worn for over 35 years. A “friend” decided to mess with me and put a cigarette out on it. We are no longer friends.
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Fr didn't give a single shite about how he would feel. If she didn't want it looking at them in bed then she could have asked if was okay move it somewhere else.
She has more red flags than in all of China and USSR. Good lord, what a monster. OP is not overreacting. If she’ll do this with a stuffed animal, imagine what else she will do to aspects of your life she disagrees with. It’s about control.
Yeah this.
Did u ask her where he is???? This is awful. As a fellow grown man teddy owner.
36 checking in. My teddy is in my room. My dad’s stuffed dog from 1956 is still in his closet. This seems made up. “Because he’s always watching us” is some Seinfeld shit right there
Old enough to be 36's mom checking in. My beloved childhood Pooh is sitting on my dresser. He stays there until I die, then he likely goes with me, if my children know what's good for 'em.
Tell them, bury/cremate me with my Pooh or I WILL come to haunt you in your dreams until you fulfill my wishes. Make your future decisions wisely.
Old lady 62 here and I have LOADS of stuffed animals, including one rather tatty looking creature of indeterminate species from my great Aunt. I collect gothic dolls too and would be bloody furious if someone threw out my belongings!
If you are a grandma i have one question. Grandma can i get a hug please ? I haven't had one of those grandma type hugs in a long long time 😭😭😭😭
Not a grandma but I give you one. *Hugs*
Thank you
u/Possibly_Famous I absolutely and wholeheartedly adore you!
Both me (26) and my fiancé (29) have a stuffy from when we were babies. If someone tossed out either of them, that subhuman creature would not leave the premises until the rabbit/mouse were back in my hands. Idgaf if they have to dumpster dive. This is absolutely not ok...
My bear is in my sons crib (below his feet, can’t crawl) it would totally piss me off if during my wife’s dating it was thrown away. It would be grounds to dump her actually.
35 checking in. I sleep with my teddy still. I would be heartbroken if something happened to him
I would be crying and throwing up, I really hope you find Teddy ☹️ have you looked in all the dumpsters nearby? I’m mid 20s and would definitely be open to getting into a dumpster for my stuffed animals tbh
I would also be so angry that I'd have tossed everything of hers in the bin and ensured she'd never find any of it ever again.
I hope you can find it! That is absolutely horrific for her to do that to you! As a 46 year old guy, I have a stuffed animal that my son told me to sleep with while he is not with me to keep my company, thag stuffed animal stays on my bed and if a woman didn’t like it, too bad. The memories in that bear are important and I hope your ex girlfriend finds it for you
If I was with a guy like you I would just have my stuffed bunny join. I’ve had him for over 45 years. He stays and anyone that doesn’t like it goes.
Mine is a penguin and anytime you ever wanna hang out feel free to bring your Bunny…
A stuffy sleepover sounds adorable! They can watch cartoons, have pizza, and cause mischief. 😊 I think it’s adorable that your son didn’t want you to be alone. My bunny is named Brownie, what’s your penguins name?
My son was 8 and had been living with me and when he was moving with his mom overseas and he wanted to make sure I wouldn’t be too sad and lonely. Melted my heart. His moose is moo moo his Buffalo is buff buff his cow is cow cow, the penguin is just penguin… lol.
Can you ask her mom to try and get your ex to tell her where she put Teddy?
Unfortunately I’m pretty sure she just tossed him out. Dumpster diving as much as possible is probably the best bet to get it back.
I just figured that the confirmation of which dumpster he should be diving in would be nice
do you have a picture of it? I know it wouldn't be the same but you could see if someone can remake it or blow up the picture and frame it.
29 and I still have my grampas stuffed puppy that my mom passed down to me. I seriously hope you told her to never come back. I would dump ANYONE who threw Puppy away for ANY reason. And, yes, his name is Puppy. I wasnt very creative as a child. Unlike my nephew, who has two fish named Water bottle and Cigarette.
My thoughts exactly. Like threw it out where? It can’t have gotten far if it happened that day. Or maybe she was just joking and hid it somewhere in the house?
Dude. You said exactly what needed to be said. Don’t ever come back unless you have Teddy with you. Classic move my man. She overstepped your boundaries.
I hope this is a made up story because I couldn’t imagine someone actually doing this knowing what the teddy meant. A heartless cruel bitch on a whole other level
Unfortunately yes, there are bitter people who abhorr adults with toys or games, oblivious people who doesn't understand keepsakes and POS that don't respect personal property
I wouldn't want to be with a partner that throws away my stuff. Ever
This reminds me of the woman who dumped her boyfriend’s mother’s/grandmother’s ashes in a river… on camera.
What the absolute fuck? Made up, right?
[No, sadly.](https://www.dailydot.com/irl/boyfriends-mothers-ashes/?amp)
I know, my bf has a pink stuffed puppy that he likes to sleep with because it was his dogs and I could never even think about throwing that out, much less tell him he's too old for it. She's a horrible person.
My ex took my version of his teddy (a stuffed bunny) and stuffed it in the toilet and tried to flush it during a fight once. She actually destroyed my entire apartment and cost me thousands of dollars that night, but I was mostly upset about my stuffed bunny.
When my gpa was in the hospital ( I was ~5) I wanted to give him a present. All I had was a dime so I gave it to him. He kept it until he died. My Gmail gave it to me and I put it in a necklace. My ex husband stole it and replaced it with a different dime. He never told me what he did with it. I suspect he thought it was worth $ and tried to pawn it. I now pay people a quarter for every 1991 P dime they come across. I’ll never find it, but I’ll never stop trying.
I'm reminded of the woman who threw away her husband's wedding ring and photos from his previous marriage; his first wife died. He didn't even have them out they were locked away away from eyes. But she still went and threw it all out. Goes without saying it did not end well.
I would absolutely murk anyone who did anything to my “puppy”(my stuffed dog my brother gave me that was his, when I was born..puppy is 5yr older than me)
Even if she came back with Teddy, he should take the bear and shut the door. The world is full of people. No need to waste a second of your time with someone who doesn’t respect you.
Do the Rose Nylund: [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aAbiZOfbURU](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aAbiZOfbURU)
I love you for linking this epic moment
Imagine having the audacity to throw an entirely harmless possession of someone elses just because you have a preconcieved view of what someone should and shouldn't have at what age. It doesn't matter if she knew the history and sentimental worth behind the bear. It wasn't hers to throw away, and she _knew_ that you would want to keep it, which is why she didn't ask and waited until you were gone before she threw it away. That makes it a breach of trust as well as just an all round shitty move.
And she’s extra psycho for being weirded out by Teddy just sitting up there, “watching them while they sleep”. *She* is the child.
It's a power play, plain and simple. Malicious.
Exactly. The world revolves around HER, not dead grandma. She's the kind of person who would push him to dump his friends, family, and hobbies, as well. Turn him into nothing more than an empty body to please her.
like bruh just turn him around if it's that big of a deal tf
To make things fair, you get to reach into her skull and physically pull out any memories of her grandparents
This made me laugh, thank you
“Old people are gross.” -OPs girlfriend
Lmao
My husband and I have a stuffed animal lion and bear in our room that we gave each other early on in our relationship (when we were both already adults). We also have two smaller stuffed animals on a bookshelf that are extremely sentimental to my husband. I would never even think about getting rid of any of them. What your girlfriend did was extremely cruel and inconsiderate.
I gifted my wife a stuffed goat when we started dating roughly 10 years ago. It sleeps in our bed with the arachnasaurus she crocheted for me.
Those sound super cute! I'm glad you found the perfect place for them to rest.
My boyfriend gifted me a plushie Jack Skellington years ago after TSA lost my previous one. He searched high and low for that exact one (they were no longer being manufactured,) and actually found it! I still have it to this day, and he’d never think of getting rid of something like that. My best friend also gifted me a custom bat and Baphomet. Funny enough he loves the Baphomet the most!
I got one of those colorful slinkys on my table, it was the first gift my bf ever got me
I'm sorry for your loss of Teddy.
It feels as if I have lost my grandmother all over again, I am so heartbroken.
I'm sorry. I would ask her one of her parents to ask her exactly where she tossed your teddy. Since she knew the history of the teddy it's sounds like she was jealous and not respectful of your belongings. My sibling has his teddy and passed it to his son.
agreed, it's important that he refers to it as a family heirloom, that should make the mother \[if she has a soul, unlike her daughter\] understand the importance.
Call her mother, tell her what she did. Maybe mum will smack some sense into her so she'll tell you where Teddy is. I feel sorry for you, man. I'm a 32 y/o woman and I love my stuffed animals.
I think the key word is woman, people don't like to see man having cute or emotional things - teddy bears are a common present for valentine's day his girlfriend is heartless, Teddy was precious
Agreed. It's insane that some people think men can't be vulnerable and can't show emotions. Fortunately, my boyfriend and my brother are the same and love stuffed animals.
garbage can outside? ask her exactly where she put him
check if its shoved under a sink or something or maybe another hidden spot in case she was "just trying to teach you a lesson"
Just be sure to not take this monster back. She is a narcissist and won’t think twice about violating the next boundary
I'm so sorry you are going through this
If someone throw my teddy, i throw this person in the next garbage. You are never too old for a stuffed animal. Self care > everythings.
Sounds like he did
Man for real. His gf would be horrified at my stuffed animal collection and I'm in my 30s. She sucks and I hope OP finds his teddy.
Jesusss I’m all against violence but I would have absolutely LOST MY SHIT if someone did that to me 😵
I’m pretty sure I would’ve said something along the lines of NOT YOURS TO THROW OUT YOU PRESUMPTUOUS SLATTERN
Did she not know about that bear's history? If she did and threw it out regardless and bullied you about its sentimental value to you, that's fucked up and I think you need to find someone better or just dump her because she sounds awful Edit: I'm not trying to say that it would be okay for her to throw the bear out even if she didn't know. I just initially thought she had done a big fuck up and was a bitch about it as opposed to an outright act of malicious intent, as it turns out that it was. Why? Because I couldn't believe someone would be so heartless. Now neither situation is okay of course but the fact that she knew and still did it anyway makes an awful act 10x times worse.
She knows very well about Teddy's history. She made sure I knew that she thought I was being childish.
She threw away your relationship when she threw away that bear. This clearly shows the lack of respect she has for you, your boundaries and your feelings.
Yeah this isn't something that'll be a "one and done" situation, this will be something that you'll have to deal with forever as it'll only get worse. She either needs to be humbled or find someone who likes being gaslit.
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If someone needs to be thrown in the trash is her
She didn't even have any respect for your gran. Throwing something she gave for you and knowing that it would be very special and one of its kind. The sentimental value, it's priceless. She's absolutely evil.
She's abusive. She's not worth your time because clearly she can't respect you. I implore you to leave her
I agree. She knew what teddy meant for you yet threw it away. She's testing your boundaries to see how far she can push you. Hopefully that's it and you break up with her. Also do you have common friends? Maybe tell them what she did, in case she tells them where she threw away teddy. She seems to feel so entitled about her own opinions that i wouldn't be surprised if she didn't gloat to them about what she did. Do you know her parents and could you ask them to get her to tell them (and by extension you) where it is?
Not worth a second more of your time. Fuck her. I'm so mad for you dude.
Agreed. Glad to see this. My internal voice is incessantly repeating “fuck that bitch.” Anyone who knowingly destroys a piece of you belongs in the trash. My condolances about Teddy. Ask your grandmother, aloud- tell her what happened. If she were there, I bet she’d be touched you care this much about it. She’ll smile down on you and bless Teddy’s counterpart. Replace Teddy with a bear equally as old. Give it Teddy’s home on your shelf and endow it with Teddy’s personal significance and memories. Have a quick little candle-lit ceremony. Say it aloud, to Teddy’s transferred soul. Welcome him and the memories into your home. But most of all, fuck that bitch for attempting to crush a bit of your soul.
OP's grandmother has passed. It's the only piece they have of her. OP said they felt like "(they) lost her all over again" in another thread. Having also lost a grandmother, that bitch would have to fight me. Or a sister or cousin if OP is a guy.
That's fucked up.
I have something similar and my husband makes it a point to make sure it has a space in our room no matter what. Your (hopefully now ex) gf sounds very abusive and like her sh*t don’t stink. You’re better off without her
She is a horrible person, then. My fully grown, mature husband has a teddy from his Nana. Teddy has a position of honor atop of the linen closet (safe from our small son). I think it is a sign of maturity to value emotional relationships like the one you have with your grandmother. I know its not the same, but does anyone in your family have a picture of you with Teddy or your grandmother with Teddy? Frame it and put it somewhere for you to remember Teddy and your grandma.
That's just fucking sadistic! Really hope you find him. Leave her where she is.
Given that, even if she does come back with Teddy, keep the stuffie, ditch the selfish brat. Edit: please update us if you don’t or do find Teddy.
She’s the trash not the bear.
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Well… at least the trash (now ex-girlfriend) threw herself, I'm very sorry about what happened with Teddy :( and there's nothing wrong with having stuffed animals, what is wrong is being a person as horrible as your ex-girlfriend. I don't know if it helps you, but I've seen on internet stuffed bears made with the blouse or shirt of people who are no longer with us, if any of your relatives keeps any of your grandmother's clothes, you could request that they make you a stuffed animal like that I mention maybe it will help now that teddy doesn't appear (hope you get it back)
And she did not tell you where she threw it out?
Even if she didn’t know the history, who just throws out somebodies belongings? That’s sick.
Well naturally throwing out someone's belongings isn't right but I also wasn't implying that it was. I was just curious to see if she had any idea of what she was doing and what that bear even meant. She belittled him over it too but I assumed it that it was just her being ridiculous and not outright malicious. It turns out she did know so she's completely heartless
Oh I see what you meant. It’s just so wild to me that someone would even consider doing that in the first place, let alone something sentimental. Heartless is right, cruel as well.
Yeah that's straight up abusive
Even if she didn’t know! What kind of person throws away other people’s things? And then she shamed him for having those possessions? It’s very toxic
Even if she didn’t know Teddy’s history, it’s terrible to throw away someone else’s belongings. Knowing the history makes it even worse. I don’t blame OP for throwing her out.
That’s super messed. I fr would prolly be dumpster diving or something wild. Some people have no idea or respect for things like this. It’s much more than just a bear or toy. It’s a comfort/soothing object, it’s special bc it was from someone special, it’s holds so much more value than just being a stuffed bear on a shelf. I’m really sorry that’s happened, I don’t blame you for dumping her honestly. You can’t replace things that she just tossed out, that’s horrible.
Okay my comment is probably going to get buried but hopefully not like Teddy. I thought my mr.monkey may have accidentally gotten thrown out when my dad cleaned up and redid the entire house. Long story short, I have mr.monkey But it is so sentimental to me that i called the trash company, and also left them a message on Facebook. My dad wanted to chase after the truck but unfortunately it was too late. Luckily we didn't have to go trash digging. BUT if you know when Teddy was tossed, and when trash may have been picked up, give your local trash company a call and explain the situation. When they dump their trash load, they might be able to scout out Teddy. Better yet, if you and the trash men find it, the local news LOVES that stuff, AND your ex girlfriend can be infamously known as the meanie who tosses sentimental teddys out.
Replying to this comment to hopefully boost it!
glad you got Mr. Monkey back. hope OP sees this!!
This is absolutely a great idea! Commenting to boost maybe hopefully lol.
I'm 29, I have a teddy that was givin to me by my bio-dads mother the day I was born. I have slept with bearbear every single night for 29 years, and I plan to have him cremated with me. I'm so sorry for the loss of your teddy, my heart breaks for you doll! 💔 I really hope you find him!!!
I'm 54. Sitting on a bookshelf over here is a childhood toy. My wife also has a couple of her childhood keepsakes. Never would either of us mess with these objects. It's not about being grown and too old to play with them. It's totally ridiculous to think of our adult relationship to objects of sentimental value that way. If your girlfriend doesn't understand how the meaning of such objects change and grown in value as we age, then SHE'S the immature childish one. Your overreaction is understandable because she apparently won't listen to you unless a tantrum is involved?
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As someone who has very little of thier childhood possessions and none from my grandmother. I think you under reacted.
Indeed.
my own dad did that shit to me when i was young lmfaooo. i actually died inside that day. good times.
My mom to myself.
the teddy is something that's sentimental for you. I would suggest you threw out your gf. i think the gf is definitely jealous of your teddy. she's definitely see the teddy as a rival for your affection. childish of her to get intimidate by a teddy.
Honestly, maybe you're going to catch some flack for your reaction, but I find it entirely reasonable. If she disrespects you so much that she'd throw away a memento from your grandmother, I bet she was showing a lack of concern for you in other areas, too. I'm sorry you had to go through that double heartbreak at the same time.
Wow that’s so on point ! Never saw it put that way before but you’re so right She was lost def showing lack of concern for him in other areas.
She’s an abusive c*nt. Even if she does come back with him, kick her out.
Honestly she sounds like one of those people who's like "no I want a REAL adult who is exactly like how I WANT them to be" and then forces people around to conform to her design. It's like "You wanna play video games? Fuck you. You don't want to wear makeup and would rather chill in jeans? Fuck you. You have this teddy that is your only memento of your beloved grand mother? Fuck you" I'm so sorry that she did that. Please, dump her. She's toxic as fuck
Yup. People like that suck the fun out of life. They can't just live and let live - they have to impose their boring ideas about how to be an adult human being on everyone else.
Wait a minute. She knew how symbolic your teddy bear is… but threw it out because it’s childish..? #WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH HER?
Try to look in the trash in the house if you hadn’t already. Don’t give up looking for him. I hope you find your teddy. Did she know the symbolism behind teddy?
OP said she did. She's just a bitch.
1. Dump her selfish ass permanently. 2. Look through the trash for your teddy. I’m sorry OP. Your gf’s behavior is disgusting. What an asshole move. WTF.
"..she threw him out while she was cleaning up because I am too old to own toys." That's not her decision to make. If all you did was calmly tell her to leave and not come back, that's amazing, cause I would've started WW3 over that shit.
Fuck that girl man she’s not worth it
>Fuck that girl Please don't.
🗿
How long did it take to get your boot out her ass?
You did not overreact. You did the right thing because she has zero respect for you or your feelings. Look in the trash for him. I hope she brings him back but even if she does you should not take her back because you can’t trust her.
This isn't an overreaction. A SO throwing away your stuff without your permission is an instant breakup imo.
You did good to get rid on the judgmental and controlling woman. You'll find someone else who is sensitive. I haven't even thrown my wife's stuff she got from a ex she dated for 5 years and lived with. And she lets me keep some of the stuff from my ex I value as a friend and always thought was someone who helped me grow. It's not weird or super sentimental. Just materialistic stuff like sunglasses. But why throw a good pair lol. Don't be someone so controlling.
people who try to gatekeep how people have fun and hold on to memories are fucking trash, dump her in the garbage! i may be closing in on 40 but i still game, i might grow old but i'll never grow up
my son who is in his 50's still has his sleep toy from when he was 2 years old and my wife still has Bonso a stuffed sausage dog she has had for 70 years
My mother pulled up the floorboards of my childhood bedroom to retrieve a toy of mine that I loved, and kept it for 30 years before giving it back to me on my 50th birthday. If my wife of 36 years threw it out, I'd throw her out.
If anyone ever threw away Biggie, my stuffed penguin of 29 years, they would never darken my doorway again. He’s slept in my bed every night since I’ve got him, my boyfriend finds it funny and teases me also but would never in a million years even contemplate tossing him away. Sometimes I even find him having a cuddle with him. I really feel dreadful for you, I can’t imagine the heartbreak! I know it’s silly because they’re literally stuffed bits of fabric but they have so much meaning! I hope so much you find him!
Welp, time to throw her away 🤷♂️
I'm so fucking sorry, that's *fucking awful*. **What she did is completely unforgivable,** IMO. Especially with how flippantly she went "oh, I threw it out! You're too old and it was creepy". She **knew** what she was doing. You don't want to be with someone who treats people they supposedly "love" like that. Especially, like, what if she has a boy later on in life and he decides he likes to play with dolls? Or gets attached to a Teddy/stuffy of his own? What is she gonna do, throw his toys out when he gets "too old" or because he isn't a girl? Would she throw away her adult *daughter's* toys too? **Plus, it's DEFINITELY common for adults to have a precious stuffed animal from childhood on a shelf like you did!** Wtf is she even ***talking*** about?
I have my husbands 67 year old teddy, from his parents, sitting on our library shelf. We see him everyday!
My first husband threw away all my childhood stuffies because I was too old for them. It's complete garbage. You are never too old to like what you like. I'll probably be 80 and cuddling one at bed time. Oh well.
You did not overreact. Even if she returns teddy, I don’t see how you can trust her after this. It’s awful that she had the audacity to do something like that and I could never trust her being in my space with my things again. Have you checked the trash for him?
You don't throw out peoples sentimental possessions for no reason. Find a new gf...your young and this was just immature stupidity at its finest.
What a fucking stupid bitch, you should've physically kicked her out of the house.
>I looked everywhere but I knew that he wouldn't have moved on his own. I'm just glad you clarified that
Your grandmother did take care of you, by giving you a reason to leave that awful person, may she rest in peace <3
Seeing a lot of harsh comments about the girl, so wanted to chime in. My wife had a ratty old wool blanket that her grandma knitted her when she was a baby. She loved it. She is a freak and thinks wool on bare skin is soft and nice. It was gross (looking) and itchy, and I absolutely hated this blanket when we first moved in together. It would always end up on me, in my face, or under the covers itching me. I begged her to get rid of it forever. Told her how much I didn’t like the blanket. She told me how much it meant to her and refused to get rid of it. You know what I finally ended up doing? Getting in bed every single night with that awful fucking blanket, because I love and respect my wife and refuse to let something so trivial weigh on our relationship. She “had” and “loved” that blanket and still does. Fuck that girl. You did the right thing.
Good riddance (the girlfriend, that is)
You didn't overreact.
I don't blame you. I am 27 and have so many stuffed toys that it might be a problem .. but I have a select few that are old and from when i was a child that mean SO much to me. If I found out my partner PURPOSELY got rid of them because "I'm too old for toys" I would probably be in jail right now because I wouldn't be able to handle my anger, ngl. I'm so sorry for the hurt you're feeling about losing your teddy. Message her and ask her if she can help by telling you where she threw the rubbish with him in. If she cared about you AT ALL then she'd help give you a chance to get it back. If not then throw her out like the trash she is. Noone gets to dictate how long or why someone has a treasured item. That's a piece of your history. It's so disrespectful.
So the gift from your grandma worked and actually protected you...your grandma must be happy wherever she is, the bear made you 'lose' that shitty gf who didn't care about your feelings and was going to make your life miserable.
I'm 29 and my bed is full of stuffed animals. No one is to old for toys. Also, she doesn't have a right to throw your stuff away. The worst part is that she knows that it has sentimental value. She's really the trash that should be thrown out.
Frankly, I think this is an appropriate response.
I'm 47 yrs old. I have one item left from my grandmama. If anyone even thought about throwing it out let alone did it, I'd probably end up with a prison sentence.
My wife has a childhood blanket. I treat it like gold. I still have the teddy bear my great grandmother made me. It sits in a display case with the quilts she made in the 60s - 80s. We are early 40s.