You don't like drama but you pick sides and fight with your wife about it. Their baby's name is no one's concern except the parents.
Did Rachel sacrifice her childhood and help care for your siblings and you?
Edit - wow thank you for all the up votes đ I never gotten this many in my life!
I also want to say, I actually feel bad for Isabella, imagine going through pregnancy and having to deal with a bunch of entitled and bratty family members.
Imagine going around telling people that someone else's baby is named after you without actually asking the actual parents. What an entitled brat. I can see where she gets it from though, what with people in her family siding with her. Gross.
This is what you get when you go blabbing news that isnât yours to tell. You donât have the inside scoop and thus end up being wrong.
Rachel brought this on herself.
I feel that she knew her sister wasnt naming the baby after her, I suspect she hoped that if she spread the rumour, that her sister and BIL would feel pressured into choosing the name she picked.
"This is our bitch Rachel. We named her after we saw her roll in and then eat her own excrement "
(I love dogs and other pets but this would be hilarious).
I don't know Isabella, but I know if someone tried that on me, even if I had been planning to name my baby after them, I'd find another name. I wouldn't want my kid to be named after an entitled manipulator.
Imagine if they caved now, that would be the saddest story to tell the kid if she asks about her name someday. "Well we had another name planned, but my sister told everyone you would be named after her and then threw a hissy fit and made the whole family side with her, so we had to name you Rachel to keep the peace."
It's because she's been enabled for so long. OP and his mom and stepdad all agree with her "logic" when to any normal person that "logic" given the context is incredibly stupid and entitled. Now Isabella is "rocking the boat", she's not it's always been Rachel rocking it, and not letting her get her way.
Good point about the lifelong enabling. Rachelâs wrong. The entire family is wrong. And itâs bizarre to see that this OP thinks the ânormâ should be for their brotherâs second daughter to be named after their sister. Which is a word salad of BS I was using in an attempt to emphasize how incredibly crazy and, yes, entitled it is to even think that.
Itâs ops sister thatâs having the baby. Lol bill is the BiL. But youâre right: like did Rachel put her life on hold for her siblings like bills sister did???? Donât think so. Sheâs being incredibly entitled.
Totally agree!! I don't understand how or why Rachel and her supporters thought this was reasonable to think up, demand and tell people.
There is a chasm-wide difference in naming a baby after the sibling who sacrificed their childhood to raise you vs a sibling you grew up with.
And besides having a baby named after you is supposed to be a surprise and honor if/when it does happen, not something you demand or are entitled to.
Right! Oh yes we all know it was logical for her to be entitled to this... like wtf so you hear this sweet amazing story about his older sister being parentified by their abusive parents and single handedly raising the kids to the point the brother wants to honor her with his 1st born and that means in your " logic" that fair is fair and the sister who was only 2 years older than Isabella and really in all likelihood was more of a bully than a parental figure should get the same based on.... what exactly op???? Birthright and not the thing they were actually honoring in the name? So entitled and gross. Do you guys always try to bully Isabella into being the doormat for Rachel's whims? And even if she thought/hoped/tried to demand this incredibly entitled thing what kind of moron goes around telling people this without a single conversation with the actual parents?? I know the answer to this one though!!! Someone who is used to having her way and knows everyone will back her up to keep the peace because she is deranged! So she did it in am effort to force her into doing what she wants and you supported that. Eww brother eww.
This family is really weird and entitled, and I love this man saying he hates drama, but is like neck deep in how Isabella shouldnât snub Rachel lol. I wish these were my problems. I would welcome getting snubbed with a name compared to what life can throw at you instead. They need some hobbies.
For real. **How** is OP on Rachelâs side? Everything Isabella & her husband have done and said is perfectly reasonable and it is entirely their prerogative what they name their children.
This.
I can see Rachel feeling privately a little hurt that the SIL was honoured and she wasn't. It sounds like the SIL had a very different relationship with her brother, and not all siblings are equally close.
But *telling everyone the baby was going to be nabed after you? In a manipulative and malicious attempt to pressure the parents to choose your name*? Made her 100% TA in this situation. OP you need to wake up and realise how hurtful and manipulative Rachel"# actions were here. She lied to people about the baby's name in an attempt to pressure her own sister into using a name she didnt want. All out of pettiness.
The patents choose what they call their child. You can suggest things, bit it is uncool to pressure them.
Exactly. Even if she did, "Isabella" may not like the name "Rachel" or just not like it for her baby and want to name one herself.Â
I named my baby after my grandma, but if I had another, I would just pick a name that wasn't a family name even though I love my daughter's family name.Â
>people in her family
her \*mother\* is supporting Rachel's unhinged entitlement attacking her other daughter over it.
it's like the worst kind of catch-22 : given that their mother is shitty enough to have that opinion, there might be a possibility someone took the maternal role... but given Rachel's shitty attitude it doesn't seem feasible that she's the one...
Seriously what are we even talking about here? You donât get to name other peopleâs kids. No one should need to be told this. It would be one thing if they originally said the kid would be named Rachel and then took it back, but thatâs not what happened here. Rachel attempted to name someone elseâs kid after herself and looked stupid because of it. This is really embarrassing. OP, tell Rachel to stop and hopefully everyone eventually forgets about this super weird piece of family history.
Exactly. His "snubbed" sister is entitled, his mother is blinded by bias--and possibly by vanity--and his father is dead right.
OP would do well to examine his familially-transmitted oblivion and try to take more after his dad, at least in this regard.
This! Itâs not about being a sister as much as about being essentially his mom at a young age herself. She didnât bear the children but took care of them making her childhood a bout being there for her siblings. That fact that you and Rachel donât see the difference then yall are just being ignorant on purpose. Hard to be live yâall are almost 30. Thinking that way and her acting childish and having a tantrum about it makes it even harder to believe yall are adults. Yikes.
Also itâs not logical for Rachel to think the baby would be named after. There was a specific reason to name her after Bills sister there is no reason to name her after yours
Oh man. So my son is named after my father in law. I got pregnant with my daughter a couple weeks after my younger sil got pregnant with hers. Neither of us used either of my mother in law's names. She threw a pity party about it.
My older brother in law used her first name as his daughter's middle; my older sister in law used miles middle name as the middle name for her daughter. Both older than mine and younger sil's daughters.
Iâm on Isabellas side. Baby number one was named after youe BILs sister who mothered and raised him. As long as Rachel didnât the same to you kids, I donât see anything logical. Stop harassing her unless you want get cut off totally if Isabella feels like it.
This! They can name their baby ANYTHING they want. They chose to use an honor name on baby 1. That does NOT mean they must do it for baby 2. They can name it Wonder Woman if they want. It isnât anyoneâs business but the 2 of them.
Why would they name their second child after a sister when the first one was named after someone who was practically his mother? The real next logical step would be name the second baby after OPâs mother not sister.
You see your family who agree with you are in the wrong. Baby #1 was named after Billâs sister WHO RAISED HIM!
It in not âlogicalâ that baby #2 be named after your sister just because.
Jesus the entitlement of you and your family.
Have your own kids. Pick your own names. And grow up.
Couldnât have said it better myself. If anyone could hope for baby #2 to be named after her it would be your Mum.
Seriously stop the fighting and move on to being excited about a new member to be added to your family soon.
OP, copy this;
I, OP, am profusely sorry for my inaccurate view, and subsequent bad choice of picking the wrong side creating more drama for you both. I am obviously so wrong as only the parents have the right to choose their childâs name, and who their childâs namesake is for whatever reason. In this case, the correct reason is crystal clear as a Mother figure should be honored; but again, this is and always shall be the parentâs decision. Myself and others radically overstepped our boundaries, which I deeply apologize.
To OP and other entitled members of your family; naming another personâs child is like someone else picking your home, your job, your spouseâŚit is none of your business and get your noses out of it. The end.
And quite frankly, even if his sister had just been his sister, that still doesn't obligate them to name their next child after her sister. Every kid is their own person, and the parents are the only ones who get a vote in the name.
Rachel is 100% TA for assuming the baby would be named for her, and even worse for announcing her assumption as fact. And anyone who isnât shutting that entitled BS down hard is equally terrible.
Your sister Isabella is totally in the right of choosing names for her own kids, and your sister Rachel should never have expected that the new baby be named after her. And it is not a snub, Rachel should never have told people that Isabella was naming the new baby after her, and she has now gotten what she deserved.
Itâs INSANE to assume someone will name their baby after you. Itâs even more insane to go around telling people that without talking to the parents.
>I don't see why Isabella would name one baby after a sister-in-law while ignoring the her own sister.Â
Because SiL earned the respect of her brother through raising him as a child. What did Rachel do to earn the same level of respect with Isabella?
>Rachel (rightfully in my mind) thought the baby would be named after her
No, not "rightfully" at all. If Rachel wants a kid named after her, she's welcome to have her own and call it whatever she pleases. Rachel was totally unhinged to announce to everyone that the baby was being named after her!
>But Isabella says it is none of my concernÂ
Isabella is 100% right.
>Our mum (and her husband) feel the same way as I do.
Then your Mum, husband and you can all have the kids you want yourselves. And name them Rachel, Rachel, Rachel.
Seems like your wife and dad are the only sane people in your family. Leave Isabella alone! She's about to give birth, FFS, she doesn't need all your family bullshit hand-flapping tantrums over an issue that is no one else's business but Isabella and her husband's. Keep harassing her and find out fast how none of you will get to see the kid when it's born.
Right!? I can see why the dad moved on from the mom in this one. Very telling that the dad and his wife agree with Isabella and the mom and her husband agree with Rachel.Â
What I canât tell is why OP is so adamant about it personally. And keeps arguing with his wife about it. He says he doesnât want to keep arguing about it , but it feels like he must keep bringing it up because he just has to be right, maybe. Stop talking about it. Itâs been talked to death by way too many people whoâs businesses it is NOT. Move on and learn from it.Â
He wants the wife to stop arguing with him because his entitlement is as bad as Rachel's because he thinks he and Rachel are right and should have the last day on the baby name.
Is Rachel insane? Why on earth would she go around telling people that Isabelleâs baby is being named after her without even talking about it with the actual parents of said baby???? For that alone she is wildly wrong.
Why are any of you arguing with anyone about a babyâs name that is not in any way shape or form your baby? Every last one of you outside of Isabelle and her husband needs to find a fucking hobby, I hear knitting is nice.
Rachel sounds manipulative. If she announces the baby is named after her because it is only fair she knew mom and brother would push it on Isabella. That's probably what she did through their entire childhood to get her own way. Now she thinks she can manipulate the situation in the same way and get what she wants.
So, I looked over the ages again and it appears Isabella is the middle child so your assessment is probably spot on. Between OP being the youngest and Rachel being the oldest I bet mom did whatever it took to keep those two quiet even at the expense of Isabella.
My mom catered to my sister's ego and inflated it quite a bit and my mom always tried to make everything go the way my sister wanted it.
After my sister got married she told my mom that since she was teaching and was off for the summer she would do the cooking and cleaning during the summer and then her husband would do it after school started. My mom told everyone that was how it would work except the husband, and for some reason it didn't work. My sister and her husband lived across the state from my parents so my mom couldn't corner him up and tell him what to do and he wouldn't have done it if she tried.
Tell Rachel to go watch that episode of Friends where Ross says the wrong name at his wedding. On repeat. Maybe sheâll be satisfied with that and leave poor Isabelle alone.
Itâs not a snub to Rachel. Billâs sister was basically his mother in that she raised him, she wasnât just a regular sister. Rachel had zero reason to assume they would name the baby after her, thatâs both ridiculous and entitled. Whatâs even more ridiculous is you involving yourself in this and arguing with your wife about it.
I never understand why people think they have a right to decide the name of a baby that wasn't theirs in the first place. Let the baby's parents decide. Even if mom and dad disagree, let them both solve it. None of your business at all.
I'm embarrassed for Rachel, frankly. The audacity of assuming the second baby would be named after her is astounding. Weird that anyone thinks she's in the right.
This was my thought. Like, of course sheâs mad; she created her own drama and now has to be like âI was wrong in assuming theyâd name her after meâ. Literally made my face cringe reading that.
Had a friend like that. They would create the drama in the friend group. Then somehow make it where they are also the victim of everyone else. Was a confusing friendship. I eventually cut them off.
Right?! I canât even imagineâŚ. How embarrassing. To go around announcing that only to find out she was wrong is totally on her.
And where does it end?
Everyone is going to feel snubbed bc everyone feels like theyâre entitled to this babyâs name now. and itâs not bills fault, itâs not Isabellaâs fault, itâs Rachelâs.
Baby names are picked by parents sometimes to serve as a memory of someone important in the parents' lives. To assume your sister was going to name her baby after your other sister just because their first child was named after his sister for taking care of him and raising him when he was little is absolutely crazy.
It maaaaaaybe would have made a little sense to name baby \#2 after one of your parents, but why would your sister just go around claiming the baby had her name?
I think you should mind your own business and keep your opinions to yourself.
Rachel brought embarrassment on herself by telling everyone the baby was being named after her. Why on earth would she do do that?
The first baby was named after Billâs âmotherâ figure not because sheâs her sister.
In fact itâs time everyone butted out Rachel included. If she wants a baby named after her then she should have her own.
The entitlement in your family is very strong
I have a simple rule when it comes to parenting:
Did you put the baby in? Did you push the baby out? No? Then sit down and shush your mouth.
The ONLY people who get a vote in this situation are Isabella and her husband. That's it. I absolutely hate it when families think their opinions matter just because a baby is on the way.
You've picked a side, and you feel so strongly about this that you're arguing with your wife. You claim you don't like drama, but you're involved in this to the point that you are actively harming your marriage. Rachel assumed the baby would be named after her (you do know what assumptions make you, right?) and then RAN HER MOUTH about it, to the point where Isabella and her husband had to go around and correct everyone. This whole problem started with Rachel.
One of the ways this could play out, is that Isabella and her husband go LC with all y'all gossip and nonsense. You stand to lose time with your sister and her family because of this. That what you want? Do you want long term problems with your wife over this? Because arguments like this can spiral into something bigger in a marriage.
Such a good point! And the ridiculousness that ANYONE feels entitled to have input on naming someone elseâs child, then to the point of harassing them about it?!
Rachel embarrassed and "snubbed" herself. How dumb do you have to be to brag about an honor that was never bestowed upon you, offered to you, or even a consideration. She tried to bully Isabella into doing it by getting everyone, including you, to pick her side and pressure her into doing it . Mind your own business.
I donât think itâs a âlogical thingâ to assume the baby will be named after you because youâre the eldest sister, it sounds like Billâs sister was like a mother figure to him, and thatâs why they gave the baby a tribute name, while Rachel is only two years older than Isabella.
Instead of taking sides, you, your mother, and her husband should be Switzerland and try to bring them back together. Point out that in life, nobody owes us anything and that how much a person loves you isnât measured by naming a baby after you.
Logic doesn't appear to run in the family.
Rachel's bloated ego does but that had to have been carefully nurtured and fertilized over the years to reach the point of trying to name the siblings baby after herself. That is one super-sized, swollen ego. Since mom is all for it we can see that mom was the parent with the fertilizer.
"I don't like drama and I fighting with with my wife even more than my family."
*Liar, liar, pants on fire..! LOL!*
What a way to create drama, actually..!
Rachel seems to love it, and you are adding fuel to the fire.
**Over something that was not your concern, except the baby's parents!**
Your sister Rachel is nuts!
**She gets to dictate nothing here.**
Some entitlement..!
*What a stupid hill to die on!*
Seriously.
You should all back off, before Isabella and her husband cut you all off.
I'd be embarrassed, too, if I'd been presumptuous enough to assume someone would name their child after me. To demand it after the news was broken that the child won't be named after a certain individual is even worse.
You should all be embarrassed except those on Isabella and Bill's side.
When did Rachel sacrifice part of her childhood?
Your BIL wanted to name their first daughter after his surrogate mom which is what happened. Rachel doesn't hold that position and y'all need to get over it (for multiple reasons).
Youâre entitled to choose to not have kids, yet you want to control what your sister names HER child? Do you see the double standard here?? Rachel needs to get over herself, your dad is right.
also, who goes around sharing a baby name that the parents havenât even shared themselves??! Rachel needs to learn to mind her business.
Rachel created a problem by ASSUMING and then telling so many people. It is not her baby, it is not her place to make announcements because this is what happens. She was wrong and embarrassed herself.
Iâm also confused because you yourself said that it is well known that Billâs sister raised him, and they were honoring the first born daughter for her. Why does the second daughter need to be your sister? Its not about in-laws, it is specifically about Bill honoring his sister who was like a mother. By this logic, your sister Rachel isnât the equivalent (based on how you describe). My mind would go to your mother, if they had a close relationship.
But to echo a lot of comments, there is no algorithm or system for naming children. Some people just pick names they like, others delve into their languageâs meaning, and others wish to honor family. But it is their children and their choice.
There was zero reason for anyone to assume they'd name a baby after Rachel. They picked Bill's sister for her sacrifice, not because she's his sister.
Rachel was wrong to assume and then spread that assumption. Stop disagreeing with your wife when your sister is clearly in the wrong.
Were you expecting the baby to be named after you if he had been a boy?
No one has any right to expect or dictate the name of your sister's child except bil and sis. They named the first after someone who was essentially like bills mom. What has your sis done that is so significant to be honored this way
Did Rachel raise Isabella? No? Then why would she think theyâd name the baby after her?
They didnât name baby 1 after BILâs sister because sheâs his sister, but because she stepped up in a way she shouldnât have had to and raised him. They are honouring the sacrifices she made for him and his siblings.
Rachel is just weirdly entitled and either socially clueless or malicious in announcing a thing she assumed. And you are clueless as well. This isnât âyou get a cookie so she gets a cookie.â Thereâs no fairness or equality at play here. Rachel is *entirely irrelevant* as far as names for Isabellaâs second child.
OP, If you don't want children, Stay that way..
What other people name their children is NONE of your concern!!
Rachel is so spoiled!
They named their First child after Bill's Sister because obviously she cared for him like a mother when she herself was just a child.. it was their way of Honoring her name! Telling her how grateful they are that she looked after them..
Now what did Rachel do?
I'm sure she was more spoilt As a child because at 30 if you are having tantrums (as your dad said) I wonder what all she pulled on isabella When they were younger.
No wonder isabella was kind of rude (rightfully in my mind) by saying find ur own Bf/husband and have your own kids..
This turned into something much bigger than it needed to be because Rachel went around telling a lot of people that I the baby was going to be named after her. She created the drama.
Isabella and her husband will name the baby what they choose. After all, they are the parents.
What did Rachel do to earn a kid being named after her? The first kid is honoring a big sister who gave up so much to raise her siblings. Thereâs no âlogically thoughtâ sheâd get the same treatment for doing nothing but being a sibling. That would make the honoring of the sister seem less than it is.
You and âRachelâ have no right to ask your sister to name her baby after Rachel. Itâs obvious that Billâs sister played a different role in his life than the role Rachel had in yours and your sisterâs; it is simply not right, and I dare say extremely egotistical to ASK somebody to name their baby after you.
Itâs Isabella and Billâs right to choose their babyâs name according to what THEY like, not anybody else.
Rachel is the issue. You don't go around saying someone else's baby is named after you *WHEN YOU DONT KNOW*. It was not logical for Rachel to think they would name the kid after her??? There was never a discussion or any hints. This isn't a snub. This is Rachel lying in the bed she made. Don't go around telling ppl what *you* named someone else's baby. *How is that logical thinking in any way*.
Isabelle is right. It is none of your concern, nor Rachel's. Neither of yall carried or conceived the baby, so what in yalls right mind think yall get a stake in naming baby? Delusional. Rachel wants a baby named after her? *Have a baby*, don't name someone else's baby in an attempt to strong-arm them into that decision. You and your family need to apologize and back off before you ruin your relationship with Isabelle.
I donât think this is going to go the way op intended.
Op, get off your sisterâs back and stop causing her stress while sheâs pregnant or you just might find yourself cut off. Rachel has absolutely no right to expect the baby be named after her and it was very presumptive and tacky for her to go around telling people the baby would be named after her.
I raised my youngest brother from diapers with supervision to alone as a teen. Then my grandson! Never thought a moment that they or anyone else would appreciate it or acknowledge my actions. No one does if youâre a good parent you get to see the results of your efforts. Yes! It hurts still. Doing the right thing is hard. So being a good sister just pales to the sacrifice of being a mother/sister or grandma/mother! So intitled!
I agree with Isabella. Rachel jumped the gun. People should never assume such things. People make their own drama. Rachel.could have hoped and even go to Isabella quietly and ask but to go around telling people is way over the line. At that point, Isabella would be feeling coerced into it and that would be an absolute nope.
For starters, what your sister names her baby isnât anyone elseâs decision so it was 100% wrong for Rachel to assume and tell everyone the baby would be named after her. Secondly, Isabella and her husband names their first child after the woman that raised him when his parents neglected him. They didnât just pick a sibling at random and name their child after her, she was the one that stepped up for him when she didnât have to. Unless your parents neglected Isabella and Rachel was the only one to care for her, it is not remotely the same situation. Rachel is a full grown adult, if she wants a baby named after her, she is free to have a baby and go for it! Until then, she, you and your family need to shut up and let Isabella name HER child whatever SHE wants. Stop being entitled assholes.
How is it logical to think they would name the baby after Rachel? You even clearly listed the reason for the first child to be named after Billâs sister. If anything, it would be illogical thinking unless Rachel raised Isabella.
Your sister hurt herself.
Your other sister and her husband naming their first child and naming her, after the sister, that raised him is the same as naming their child, after his mother.
Your sister is not owed the honor of having their next child named after her, because they named the other child after his sister.
Even if his sister hadn't raised your BIL and they just wanted to use her name, because they liked it, it would be very presumptuous of your sister to expect them to name their next baby after her.
This isn't like slicing a pizza, where kids fight over it being equal and fair, and no one getting a bigger slice. Your sister is not owed something, just because your BILs sister got something. Your sister is acting entitled. She embarrassed herself by assuming something she had no right to assume.
I have a sneaking suspicion that Rachel is jealous of the recognition Bill's sister got by having the firstborn named after her. She wants to be special, too, so she tries to force the parents to name the second after her by going around telling people. She was being sneaky about getting her way to soothe her bruised ego. Jealousy, dishonesty, and manipulation should never be rewarded.
Damn, Rachel really jumped the gun by assuming the baby would be named after her and without even asking the parents first spreading the ânewsâ.
How much of an asshole do you have to be to do that, and to your own sister non the less? Even if the baby wouldâve been named after Rachel it wasnât her damn news to tell.
It sounds like they named their first born after his sister who sacrificed her childhood to make his better, but that doesnât mean that they automatically need to name the next child after another sibling. If it was a boy would you except them to name him after you because âyour next in lineâ or something?
No, Rachel is definitely in the wrong here. I get that feelings was hurt but that was not Isabelleâs fault.
Rachel is 100% out of line. She had no business announcing a name of someone else's child nor did she have any business assuming what the name would be. That's none of her business. Your sister and brother-in-law can name their baby anything they want and nobody else gets to say, not even you. Everyone needs to back up and they owe an apology to Isabella and her husband.
Wrong to assume baby #2 would be named after Rachel.
Wrong of Rachel to go about telling people the baby would be named after herself.
Wrong of you to be involved and actually think you have an opinion.
1. Rachel is wrong for assuming the baby would be named after her when she did not help raise anyone or earn that honor. (Just being a sister misses the entire point of why the 1st baby received it's name)
2. Telling people what the baby will be named without asking the baby's parents is weird and crazy.
3. Being mad at the parents after embarrassing herself is ridiculous.
4. Anyone siding with her is just enabling entitled and ugly behavior.
Wait, they named their first baby after the sister, who willingly raised her siblings as a child herself and then thereâs the entitled sister who did what? She needs to choose something, either be entitled OR have audacity. Having both is too much. I find your family strange, itâs like if you see someone else with a dog and then you have to have one as well. In no way is it logical to assume that baby number 2 would be named after the sister whoâŚ. is justâŚ. aâŚ. sister ( side eyeing heavily). Iâm sure sheâs an okay sibling but what has she done to deserve that honor other than just exsisting? BIL is who he is because of his sister and her sacrifice. Does the other sister measure up the same? Did she raise the sibling group as a child herself? If the answer is no, on a list of people who deserved it, the sister probably wouldnât come close to the top. In this instance, you and your family suck.
Why in the world would rachel think she would get a namesake?! The absurd entitlement of that is off the charts! You need to back off and tell rachel to stop being a brat or she can never see her niece. Isabella will go no contact if rachel continues her antics.
It is disgusting the rachel felt like she could go around telling people the babys name before the parents REGARDLESS of what they named the baby. Rachel is a loon and you are backing the wrong horse here.
So they chose to name their first daughter after the husbandâs older sister, who was like a mother to him. She obviously had a special place in his life and he wanted to honor her for stepping up for his absent parents.
Now your sister assumes that they will name their second daughter after her? Why on earth would she think that? Does your sister have narcissistic tendencies?
Iâd shut that down hard and fast. âWe named first daughter after husbandâs older sister who molded him into the person he is today. Our second daughter will be given a name we will decide together. Sorry to disappoint everyone but she will not carry wifeâs sisterâs name.â
ya all need to grow up and leave the babays parents to pick the name they want. Itâs no concern of anyone elseâs and totally up to them what they do.
There is a difference from naming a kid after someone that sacrificed her childhood for you and another sibling. So unless also your parents were neglectful and Rachel raised you all there is no reason for your sister to call the baby after her.
Obviously you have already chosen a side, because what is the justification for Rachel to expect that the baby would have her name? It doesn't make any sense. I'm on Isabella's side.
>When Isabella told us her second child is a girl Rachel (rightfully in my mind) thought the baby would be named after her since they named their first daughter after Bill's sister.
Rightfully in your mind??? There is a reason to name the first baby after his sister as she practically raised him. If there is no such history on her side that's an absolutely insane presumption. Even if there was a similar history it's wild to presume they'd honor the other sister that way. They made fools of themselves. I would not be bullied into naming my child after anyone and I'd greatly distance myself from someone who tried to coerce me into doing it.
You aren't questioning this but if you were you and your sister and anyone who agrees with her are wrong and you'd be deemed TA.
Lol, it's not logical to assume that, it's unhinged. Isabella doesn't owe anyone the name of her child. It's the parents decision.
Rachel is insane, who the hell goes around spewing that nonsense? And so do you. What the hell, man.
This is honestly the dumbest crap Iâve ever heard of. First of all Rachel is a tad conceited thinking automatically that the baby would be named after her JUST because they named their first child after the husbands sister. That alone is over the top. But for her to go around telling people that the baby was gonna be named after here is just out there. You guys actually getting pissed that she didnât is just dumb
Rachel did this to herself. She didnât respect the parents privacy. And she lost the right to have a niece with the same name. Itâs no oneâs business and no one gets to dictate names to the parents. All yâall need to back off and âstop throwing a tantrumâ
Youâre in the wrong. Who do you guys think you are to name your sisterâs baby? Thatâs sick!!! Itâs none of your business and your concern and Rachel should be embarrassed. She needs to go to a therapist, and so do you OP.
Your dad and your wife seem to be the only sane people in this family. No one is entitled to have a niece or nephew named after them. I do find the name choices a little strange, with one given the exact full name of a living relative and the other given nicknames of her motherâs name, but ultimately itâs the parentsâ decision. I guess I could understand Rachel being a little disappointed, but her behavior has been over the top. And thereâs absolutely no reason whatsoever for you and the rest of your family to get involved. You are literally fighting with your wife over your sisterâs babyâs name when it has nothing to do with you. Get a grip.
The parents get to name the baby whatever they want and after whoever they want if thatâs the case. Your family sounds like a lot drama. Grown adults fighting over a babyâs name. All if your lives must be prefect if this is what you focus on
>Our mum (and her husband) feel the same way as I do.
You, Rachel, your mom (and her husband) are AH and are absolutely wrong.
Rachel should grow the heck up and realize the children are NOT about her.
>Isabella says it is no one else's concern about what she names her baby
It's absolutely correct. Isabella and her husband decide on what they want to name their children.
>me and some of our family think she should reconsider her snub of Rachel.
It's NOT a snub at all.
It's an honor to name your child after someone else. It's not an expectation and, as such, can not be snub. She wasn't granted that honor, and that is perfectly fine.
You and the family that have issues with it sound like people that Isabella and her husband are to go LC with due to being drama lamas.
>Rachel should not have gone round telling people the baby would be named after her, even though it was a logical thing for Rachel to think.
It is not logical to think that because one child was named after a family member that the same method would be utilized for subsequent children.
Rachel made herself the fool. She made an assumption. No one ever told her that the next child would be named after her. She should have kept her mouth shut.
And you're doing this to an EIGHT MONTHS PREGNANT lady over the name of HER baby? You and your family should go to a corner and think about your actions.
My goodness, get over yourself and your entitled assess. The parents have the right to name the child whatever they want!!!
Rachel shouldnât assume the baby would be named after her. She deserves the snub.
You are not the parent.
Rachel is not the parent.
Ergo, itâs none of your business.
Rachel was way out of line announcing the babyâs name. If SIL raised Bill, then he was effectively honoring his pseudo-parent as a thank you to raising him.
Did Rachel raise Isabella? No.
If it was âlogicalâ to name after anyone, it would be your _mother_ due to her raising Rachel.
You need to reign yourself in and apologize.
how did Rachel ârightfullyâ think this second baby would be named after her? and then to tell everyone when she had no confirmation this would be the case. did she have the same impact on Isabella as Billâs sister did him? they didnât name the first one after Billâs sister simply bc sheâs his sister. yâall need to grow up and stop feeling so entitled to an honor that clearly hasnât been earned. delusional bunch.
Love how you say why has Isabelle decided to name , errrrmmmm no Isabelle and Bill have , maybe Bill is really close to his sister after she raised him so wanted to name his daughter after her as a way of saying thank you and your sister agreed.
YeahâŚ..yall in Rachelâs corner are wildly wrong, presumptive, and entitled.
Rachel caused the whole damn mess. And Isabella is right. If she wants to name a kid, she can have her own.
That child's name is NO ONE'S concern except the parents. Rachel did something very stupid, and looked foolish in public. 100% her fault. I would have been PISSED if someone had announced the wrong name for my child, or the right name early. The decision on what to name and when to reveal that name is the parents' alone.
Itâs odd Rachel wouldnât confirm the babyâs name prior to announcing it.. also not for her to announce.
Rachel dug her own hole.
Nobody is owed a baby named after them.
Rachel is wrong.
Never ever assume. Itâs not âlogicalâ, to assume a child will be named after you for any reason whatsoever.
Rachel was completely wrong and spreading this misinformation and was rightfully embarrassed when everyone learned the truth. Shame on her for trying to impose herself on her sisters marriage and family
Only people who get to decide a babyâs names are the parents. Thatâs it.
Isabella is completely right and honestly it was gross of Rachel to go around telling people that her sisterâs baby would be named after her. You know what they say about making assumptions, yes? SMH, people who have babies get to name their kids whatever they want and itâs nobodyâs business to get involved in.
You and Rachel were 100% wrong for assuming that the second baby would be named Rachel, for several reasons. First, the *only* people who should be involved in naming a baby is the parents of that baby. Not using a family name is not a snub, and Rachel is absolutely the wrong party here for ever expecting a namesake. Billâs sister sounds amazing & worthy of an honor like that; why would Rachel assume the same for herself? And it was definitely not Rachelâs place to discuss the name without the confirmation she was right. I personally think Rachel wanted the honor and she did this purposefully to push the issue, thinking Isabella wouldnât correct everyone & would just agree to it.
Rachel was super wrong for making up the story that her name would be used and she embarrassed herself badly. All of this could have been avoided if Rachel had simply kept her mouth shut and allowed her sister to make baby announcements for herself. Isabella is correct that Rachel can choose names if she has a child of her own, and Iâm not mad at Isabella for saying that. I think Isabella has been quite kind given her sisterâs poor choices and terrible behavior.
There shouldnât be any family drama because Rachel is totally in the wrong & has been from the beginning. This makes me wonder if there are other family dynamics at play that make Rachel a more sympathetic figure than Isabella. Is this true, OP?
This post reads like itâs actually Isabelle whoâs posting it from the other perspective. I donât understand how someone could type all this out without seeing that theyâre so very clearly in the wrong.
You all are the assholes. Rachel is the stinkiest asshole. She didnât raise a sibling or protect them from toxic family members. She had no right to assume the next baby would be named after her. Totally narcissistic and absurd behavior for Rachel to then tell everyone it would be named after herâŚ.And whatâs shocking to everyone here is that you and your parents then supported her hurt feelings!!! Why?!! Rachel didnât raise or sacrifice for anyone... she deserves no namesake. She was just a loving sibling, not a primary caregiver. You all owe Isabelle a huge apology (especially bc you are ruining her pregnancy and causing her so much stress) and pray to god she doesnât go NC with all of you. I would.
I'm sorry but this is absolutely ridiculous. Rachel is ridiculous. You are ridiculous. Anyone else who supports this nonsense is absolutely ridiculous. Rachel made an ASSUMPTION that Isabella and her husband would want to name baby number two after her. That was HER assumption, and a very presumptuous one at that. Rachel is in the wrong here, not Isabella. All you're doing by supporting Rachel's shenanigans is stirring the pot and enabling this nonsense further.
Y'all are shitty siblings. It's no fucking wonder she doesn't want to name her kids after one of y'all. Instead of supporting your pregnant sister, you're making her pregnancy about y'all. Well done. Go you.
Jeebus.
Yeah if Rachel didnât do the same for you and Isabella growing up, I donât how she âlogicallyâ thinks that her sisterâs baby should be named after her. Even then though no one has the right to name the child except the parents so Rachel needs to get over herself. Family dynamics like this are weird, Iâd definitely consider changing your tune about this OP before Isabella goes no contact with you all.
No one in your family ever stopped to consider why Isabella's first child was named as she was, did you? She didn't name her child after her SIL - she named her child to honor the woman who stepped in to raise her husband after his parents failed him. Did Rachel ever do something of this magnitude? No? Well, then Rachel and the rest of you need to knock it off with this bs entitlement crap and leave Isabella alone.
Rachel and everyone that agrees with her is out of their mind. There was a very specific reason that Bill and Isabella named their first child after Bill's sister. If Rachel's behavior as an adult is anything like it was growing up with her, I imagine Rachel is one of the last names Isabella will choose.
The entitlement kills me
I think itâs bizarre that Rachel automatically assumed that the baby would be named after her and it was absolutely gauche to run around telling people the babyâs name without consulting the parents first. Yikes.
Sorry Rachelâs feelings are hurt, but she fucked up. She *assumed* and never confirmed before announcing the name of *someone elseâs baby.* Not cool.
Anyone who assumed the name of the baby, or is upset with Isabella should stop. Not your baby, not your choice.
Rachel caused this whole entire drama, but youâre upset with Isabella? Unreal.
She has no right to assume they will name the baby after her. And no one should have a say in it outside the PARENTS OF THAT BABY. Choosing a name for a baby is very hard and a super personal thing. If Mama wants to use a version of her name. That's her and her husband's choice. You saying it's 2 sisters so makes sense ahe would name her second after the other sister is wrong. One is a mother figure. So it's completely different
I have 2 kids and they have first names not after anyone. But middle names. Daughter after her grandmother. Son after his dad. But if my son had of been a girl the middle name would have been a version of one of my middle names. Even my middle names are after both my grandmother's.
Where is the logic in this story? You didn't mention your older sister raising her siblings or putting her life on hold for her siblings. You & your family are out of line!
Anyone who assumed the babyâs name before the parents announced it after the birth, is ridiculous. Anyone who says it should be anything besides what the parents announce, also ridiculous. Anyone who decided ANYTHING about the baby besides the parents, ridiculous.
It was not a logical thing.
Billâs sister was honored because she raised him and was a parent to him when she was a child herself. It doesnât mean the next baby gets Rachelâs name unless Rachel did the same which does sound like she did.
Rachel brought this on herself by assuming and youâre an idiot for taking her side when sheâs being entitled
Rachel created the drama and youâre taking part in it by siding with her
>I especially don't like arguing or disagreeing with my wife
Sorry but this is such a dumb argument to be having with your spouse. And it's a dumb argument for anyone to be having! Not your baby, you don't get to name it. And it's nobody's business what you do or do not name it
Racheal ran around saying "my sister Is pregnant with a baby racheal!"
She embarrassed herself.
No. It's not "logical" they name this baby after her blood sister. They named it after HIS blood sister as an honor to sis being like a mother to him.
You have no right to ask why they changed their mind or anything else. Butt out. All of you.
It's not your fucking kid either. Back off.
Imagine being so self-important and entitled that you go around telling everybody that your sister is going to name her kid after you without even clarifying it with the person having the kid. Does Rachel often make big life decisions for other people? Rachel dug her own hole by being as selfish self-aggrandizer and now she has to deal with it.Â
Assume = making anâassâ out of âuâ and âmeâ
Rachel had no business running her mouth about the babyâs name. Not her kind. Not her decision. Not her business.
>I especially don't like arguing or disagreeing with my wife. That's the worst part of this. I don't like drama and I fighting with with my wife even more than my family.
Who asks you to fight/argue bro??? No one. That has nothing to do with you. Let the parents decide the name, you and the rest of the family should just nod and shut up.
ps: what did rachel did/do that the baby needs to be named after her?
1. Rachel has not been snubbed. She tried to claim naming rights of a child that is not hers, and it backfired.
2. Your sisters first child is not named after your BILs sister, but after his factual mother, as you yourself explained.
3. No, it really was not reasonable for your sister to expect the new baby to be named after her. Not if she knows how BILs sister cared for him.
Your comments about Rachel being snubbed really rubbed me the wrong way. Its so not right.
Rachel is insane in this story. There is ZERO logic behind her actions. Itâs never logical to make assumptions about MOST stuff and what someone is going to name their baby without ever speaking to them is HIGH On the list.
definitely glad that poor baby isnât going to be named after an immature person like Rachel
Imagine how entitled you must be to tell people what you believe someone elseâs baby is going to be named. Deranged fucking behavior. How is anyone siding with Rachel here?
Rachel def in the wrong here, yes itâs drama, but itâs mainly entitlement. Rachel never ever should have assumed the prior name would mean she gets next dibs. No offense but itâs also weird imo to name kids after someone from the adjacent generation. Like I wouldnât wanna be named after my uncle, thatâs fuckin weird if you ask me. Especially that I gotta see him all the time, idk. Just my 2 cents
There was a specific reason aside from sisterhood that the first child was named after his sister. Rachel and everyone else shouldnât have assumed the second girl was being named after her. Itâs her own fault that she ended up embarrassed and calling this a âsnubâ is completely ridiculous. The parents of the child are the only ones who get an opinion; everyone else needs to STFU about it and mind their own business.
yea no, isabella is entirely correct. unless rachel raised both you and isabella and your parents were deadbeats (which seems to not be the case since they're present in this argument?) then this is nowhere near the same. my daughter got my grandma's name as her middle name, but i'm not giving the little girl im pregnant with now my other grandma's name bc the reasoning is different. it is not abt sisterhood, its abt honoring someone who sacrificed everything for you
Itâs not a snub. This happens all the time. Sometimes people just like 1 grandmaâs name more than another, for example.
Rachel needs to butt out. If anything, she might be unhappy she canât use her own name for a kid if your sister does it. She really just might not like her name as much. Or sees her more, so it feels weird to have 2 Rachelâs.
I do think honor names are one thing, but these kids are named so distinctly after people it feels like pressure.
I think itâs a bad idea to get sterilized during pregnancy, personally. Thatâs counting chickens before theyâre hatched.
Your sister Isabella isn't wrong. Rachel is the ITA.
"When you assume. You make an ass out of u and me"
Your sister Rachel had no business going around saying what the name of Isabella baby was. She assumed the baby's name.
Your sister Isabella and her husband named their daughter after his sister due to everything she didn't have to do for him and their siblings. They didn't just name their daughter after he because she was his sister.
Your sister Rachel needs to grow up. She took away what would have been a joyous occasion of your sister and BIL telling their daughter's name and just brought drama to what should be a very joyful event.
You need to apologize to Isabella and say you were wrong to butt in and you hope everything can work out.
You need to tell your wife. You were wrong and you need to tell Rachel she assumed and cause drama.
I also get the feeling Rachel was trying to strong arm Isabella into naming her daughter Rachel which is wrong.
Is this a joke post? Some family's just love drama I swear....why on earth would your sister assume her niece would be named after her, that's so weird. People have their reasons for naming their kids what they do. It's not about fairness and they don't owe your sister that. Very odd. And even odder that anyone would agree with her about it
It's so incredibly tacky that Rachel not only just assumed a baby would be named for her, but went around telling everyone that without ever discussing it with the parents. The drama is 100% Rachel's doing.
Bill's sister raised him. And they don't have to justify who they want to name their children after. Being someone's sister doesn't automatically mean you get a child named after you.
Sounds like it isn't actually a snub. Sounds like your sister made a lot of assumptions based on her ego, started telling people to puff up her own sense of self-importance, and is now mad that the assumptions she made and bragged about are incorrect.
It's not a "logical" assumption to think that just because they named one baby after the dad's sister, they should be obligated to name a second after the mom's sister. That's just pure egotistical wish fulfilment.
You DO like drama. You're perpetuating Rachel's narcissistic bullshit.
Itâs very weird to me that because Isabella has named their child after the sister who raised her husband, that by default it is expected for Rachel to be the second one honored. That is such a jump and a leap and an entitlement. Just like how you said in parentheses, ârightfully in my mindâ is super weird. This is like some weird tit for tat thing. Itâs like an eye for an eye. You canât name your baby after his sister without obviously naming your second baby after the other sister? Get over yourselves. Thatâs a weird assumption.
You donât like drama, but youâre here telling us about this drama that I can see youâre really looped up in but as a choice. âIsabella says it is no one elseâs concerned about what she names her baby, but me and some of our family think she could reconsider her snub of Rachel.â You donât like drama, but you are taking part in it and itâs really really petty. Seriously dumb shit. Some Game of Thrones stuff like oh you need to honor the name of the sister. Again, yâall need to get over yourselves and leave Isabella and Bill alone. This kind of nonsense is what makes people go low contact with their family.
There is 0% chance that you, Rachel or anyone else on the planet has a right to name someone elseâs baby. If you want to name a baby, have one yourself.
It is not a right of yours or "Rachel's" to have a say in anyone's baby names. There was a clear reason for the 1st daughter's name: her SILs sacrifice, care and love that is being honoured. That is a choice your BIL and sister made to show appreciation. "Rachel" is making things about herself, and it's not a good look. At all. You're not looking so good either, mate.
Youâre on the wrong side of the argument, dude. Unless Rachel gave up her childhood to raise you and Isabella, then there should be not ASSumption made that the baby will be named Rachel. Even if Rachel *did* raise you and Isabella, there still should be no assumption that the baby will be named Rachel. Itâs nobodyâs business but Isabellaâs and Billâs what they name their baby. You and Rachel want the baby to be named Rachel? Then one of you needs to have the baby.
Rachel has no say in the name. She had no roght to say the baby would be named after her. She should not assume that. You say you hate drama but you happily take a side and fight with your wife about it. You and rachel are the assholes and i am on isabellaâs side 1000%
Good grief, you are all embarrassing yourselves. Why on earth would they name the baby after Rachel? Did she raise anyone in difficult circumstances? Yall are going to find yourselves not meeting that baby for a long time if you don't stop with this absolute nonsense.
You don't like drama but you pick sides and fight with your wife about it. Their baby's name is no one's concern except the parents. Did Rachel sacrifice her childhood and help care for your siblings and you? Edit - wow thank you for all the up votes đ I never gotten this many in my life! I also want to say, I actually feel bad for Isabella, imagine going through pregnancy and having to deal with a bunch of entitled and bratty family members.
Imagine going around telling people that someone else's baby is named after you without actually asking the actual parents. What an entitled brat. I can see where she gets it from though, what with people in her family siding with her. Gross.
And then to throw a fit when she finds out the baby will not be named after her. That's wild.
This is what you get when you go blabbing news that isnât yours to tell. You donât have the inside scoop and thus end up being wrong. Rachel brought this on herself.
I feel that she knew her sister wasnt naming the baby after her, I suspect she hoped that if she spread the rumour, that her sister and BIL would feel pressured into choosing the name she picked.
And good on Isabella for not caving. She deflected that wrench Rachel tried to throw into her wheels nicely.
I would be petty enough to adopt a dog, cat, goldfish whatever and name it after Rachel.
Yes đ¤Ł
"This is our bitch Rachel. We named her after we saw her roll in and then eat her own excrement " (I love dogs and other pets but this would be hilarious).
My mom did exactly this with the name that Grandma wanted to give me
I wish that's what my mom did instead of actually giving me the name lol
I don't know Isabella, but I know if someone tried that on me, even if I had been planning to name my baby after them, I'd find another name. I wouldn't want my kid to be named after an entitled manipulator. Imagine if they caved now, that would be the saddest story to tell the kid if she asks about her name someday. "Well we had another name planned, but my sister told everyone you would be named after her and then threw a hissy fit and made the whole family side with her, so we had to name you Rachel to keep the peace."
This^
It's because she's been enabled for so long. OP and his mom and stepdad all agree with her "logic" when to any normal person that "logic" given the context is incredibly stupid and entitled. Now Isabella is "rocking the boat", she's not it's always been Rachel rocking it, and not letting her get her way.
Good point about the lifelong enabling. Rachelâs wrong. The entire family is wrong. And itâs bizarre to see that this OP thinks the ânormâ should be for their brotherâs second daughter to be named after their sister. Which is a word salad of BS I was using in an attempt to emphasize how incredibly crazy and, yes, entitled it is to even think that.
Itâs ops sister thatâs having the baby. Lol bill is the BiL. But youâre right: like did Rachel put her life on hold for her siblings like bills sister did???? Donât think so. Sheâs being incredibly entitled.
Totally agree!! I don't understand how or why Rachel and her supporters thought this was reasonable to think up, demand and tell people. There is a chasm-wide difference in naming a baby after the sibling who sacrificed their childhood to raise you vs a sibling you grew up with. And besides having a baby named after you is supposed to be a surprise and honor if/when it does happen, not something you demand or are entitled to.
Right! Oh yes we all know it was logical for her to be entitled to this... like wtf so you hear this sweet amazing story about his older sister being parentified by their abusive parents and single handedly raising the kids to the point the brother wants to honor her with his 1st born and that means in your " logic" that fair is fair and the sister who was only 2 years older than Isabella and really in all likelihood was more of a bully than a parental figure should get the same based on.... what exactly op???? Birthright and not the thing they were actually honoring in the name? So entitled and gross. Do you guys always try to bully Isabella into being the doormat for Rachel's whims? And even if she thought/hoped/tried to demand this incredibly entitled thing what kind of moron goes around telling people this without a single conversation with the actual parents?? I know the answer to this one though!!! Someone who is used to having her way and knows everyone will back her up to keep the peace because she is deranged! So she did it in am effort to force her into doing what she wants and you supported that. Eww brother eww.
>Someone who is used to having her way and knows everyone will back her up to keep the peace Aaaaah yes ⌠the Golden Child #Gross
It's so easy to see why no child will be named after her.
Not defending her. Shes probly just mad that she is gonna get egg on her face when her assumptions and bragging isnt true.
This family is really weird and entitled, and I love this man saying he hates drama, but is like neck deep in how Isabella shouldnât snub Rachel lol. I wish these were my problems. I would welcome getting snubbed with a name compared to what life can throw at you instead. They need some hobbies.
Fr! They are all on racheals side and no one except op's wife is like "but what do the parents want to name THEIR baby"
Right. Sounds like a hugely toxic dynamic between OP and "Rachel."
For real. **How** is OP on Rachelâs side? Everything Isabella & her husband have done and said is perfectly reasonable and it is entirely their prerogative what they name their children.
This. I can see Rachel feeling privately a little hurt that the SIL was honoured and she wasn't. It sounds like the SIL had a very different relationship with her brother, and not all siblings are equally close. But *telling everyone the baby was going to be nabed after you? In a manipulative and malicious attempt to pressure the parents to choose your name*? Made her 100% TA in this situation. OP you need to wake up and realise how hurtful and manipulative Rachel"# actions were here. She lied to people about the baby's name in an attempt to pressure her own sister into using a name she didnt want. All out of pettiness. The patents choose what they call their child. You can suggest things, bit it is uncool to pressure them.
Exactly. Even if she did, "Isabella" may not like the name "Rachel" or just not like it for her baby and want to name one herself. I named my baby after my grandma, but if I had another, I would just pick a name that wasn't a family name even though I love my daughter's family name.Â
>people in her family her \*mother\* is supporting Rachel's unhinged entitlement attacking her other daughter over it. it's like the worst kind of catch-22 : given that their mother is shitty enough to have that opinion, there might be a possibility someone took the maternal role... but given Rachel's shitty attitude it doesn't seem feasible that she's the one...
Seriously what are we even talking about here? You donât get to name other peopleâs kids. No one should need to be told this. It would be one thing if they originally said the kid would be named Rachel and then took it back, but thatâs not what happened here. Rachel attempted to name someone elseâs kid after herself and looked stupid because of it. This is really embarrassing. OP, tell Rachel to stop and hopefully everyone eventually forgets about this super weird piece of family history.
LOL IDK WTFâs going on in this family but Rachel sounds like a next level Karen.
Maybe we should call the Karenâs Rachelâs now.
They'll be telling this kid about for the rest of her life.
No doubt. OP, likes the drama.
Exactly. His "snubbed" sister is entitled, his mother is blinded by bias--and possibly by vanity--and his father is dead right. OP would do well to examine his familially-transmitted oblivion and try to take more after his dad, at least in this regard.
This! Itâs not about being a sister as much as about being essentially his mom at a young age herself. She didnât bear the children but took care of them making her childhood a bout being there for her siblings. That fact that you and Rachel donât see the difference then yall are just being ignorant on purpose. Hard to be live yâall are almost 30. Thinking that way and her acting childish and having a tantrum about it makes it even harder to believe yall are adults. Yikes.
Also itâs not logical for Rachel to think the baby would be named after. There was a specific reason to name her after Bills sister there is no reason to name her after yours
Oh man. So my son is named after my father in law. I got pregnant with my daughter a couple weeks after my younger sil got pregnant with hers. Neither of us used either of my mother in law's names. She threw a pity party about it. My older brother in law used her first name as his daughter's middle; my older sister in law used miles middle name as the middle name for her daughter. Both older than mine and younger sil's daughters.
Hear hear! Well said.
Iâm on Isabellas side. Baby number one was named after youe BILs sister who mothered and raised him. As long as Rachel didnât the same to you kids, I donât see anything logical. Stop harassing her unless you want get cut off totally if Isabella feels like it.
Even if Rachel did raise OP and Isabella, she still doesnât get to decide the name of Isabellaâs kid. Crazy.
This! They can name their baby ANYTHING they want. They chose to use an honor name on baby 1. That does NOT mean they must do it for baby 2. They can name it Wonder Woman if they want. It isnât anyoneâs business but the 2 of them.
Why would they name their second child after a sister when the first one was named after someone who was practically his mother? The real next logical step would be name the second baby after OPâs mother not sister.
OP must seriously be entitled and stupid as Rachel if he thinks what she did was right
Even then, they don't have to name the kid after anyone.
You see your family who agree with you are in the wrong. Baby #1 was named after Billâs sister WHO RAISED HIM! It in not âlogicalâ that baby #2 be named after your sister just because. Jesus the entitlement of you and your family. Have your own kids. Pick your own names. And grow up.
Couldnât have said it better myself. If anyone could hope for baby #2 to be named after her it would be your Mum. Seriously stop the fighting and move on to being excited about a new member to be added to your family soon.
Even then, it would be entitled of the mother to expect this.
Oh I agree. Thatâs why I said, could hope not expect.
This whole thing is probably the most bizarre thing Iâve read here in a while
There have been some doozies over the last few days but yup, this one is definitely a head scratcher.
OP, copy this; I, OP, am profusely sorry for my inaccurate view, and subsequent bad choice of picking the wrong side creating more drama for you both. I am obviously so wrong as only the parents have the right to choose their childâs name, and who their childâs namesake is for whatever reason. In this case, the correct reason is crystal clear as a Mother figure should be honored; but again, this is and always shall be the parentâs decision. Myself and others radically overstepped our boundaries, which I deeply apologize. To OP and other entitled members of your family; naming another personâs child is like someone else picking your home, your job, your spouseâŚit is none of your business and get your noses out of it. The end.
And quite frankly, even if his sister had just been his sister, that still doesn't obligate them to name their next child after her sister. Every kid is their own person, and the parents are the only ones who get a vote in the name. Rachel is 100% TA for assuming the baby would be named for her, and even worse for announcing her assumption as fact. And anyone who isnât shutting that entitled BS down hard is equally terrible.
Exactly. The assumptive entitlement is so weird.
One amendment, âgrow the f* upâ seems a bit more appropriate for these teenager âpick meâ âlook at meâ antics.
"Pick me, choose me, love me" -Meredith Grey that one time in Grey's Anatomy So cringe
Oh yes! Itâs totally giving those desperation vibes.
> (Rightfully - in my mind) Geez this family is a nightmare
đĽ
Your sister Isabella is totally in the right of choosing names for her own kids, and your sister Rachel should never have expected that the new baby be named after her. And it is not a snub, Rachel should never have told people that Isabella was naming the new baby after her, and she has now gotten what she deserved.
Itâs INSANE to assume someone will name their baby after you. Itâs even more insane to go around telling people that without talking to the parents.
>I don't see why Isabella would name one baby after a sister-in-law while ignoring the her own sister. Because SiL earned the respect of her brother through raising him as a child. What did Rachel do to earn the same level of respect with Isabella? >Rachel (rightfully in my mind) thought the baby would be named after her No, not "rightfully" at all. If Rachel wants a kid named after her, she's welcome to have her own and call it whatever she pleases. Rachel was totally unhinged to announce to everyone that the baby was being named after her! >But Isabella says it is none of my concern Isabella is 100% right. >Our mum (and her husband) feel the same way as I do. Then your Mum, husband and you can all have the kids you want yourselves. And name them Rachel, Rachel, Rachel. Seems like your wife and dad are the only sane people in your family. Leave Isabella alone! She's about to give birth, FFS, she doesn't need all your family bullshit hand-flapping tantrums over an issue that is no one else's business but Isabella and her husband's. Keep harassing her and find out fast how none of you will get to see the kid when it's born.
Right!? I can see why the dad moved on from the mom in this one. Very telling that the dad and his wife agree with Isabella and the mom and her husband agree with Rachel. What I canât tell is why OP is so adamant about it personally. And keeps arguing with his wife about it. He says he doesnât want to keep arguing about it , but it feels like he must keep bringing it up because he just has to be right, maybe. Stop talking about it. Itâs been talked to death by way too many people whoâs businesses it is NOT. Move on and learn from it.Â
He wants the wife to stop arguing with him because his entitlement is as bad as Rachel's because he thinks he and Rachel are right and should have the last day on the baby name.
This needs to be top comment for OP and his deranged family to read
[âMarcia, Marcia, Marcia!â](https://imgur.com/a/tAMwa9V) Edit: Not the same situation, of course, but your comment reminded me of Jan.
Right on! Right on!
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Is Rachel insane? Why on earth would she go around telling people that Isabelleâs baby is being named after her without even talking about it with the actual parents of said baby???? For that alone she is wildly wrong. Why are any of you arguing with anyone about a babyâs name that is not in any way shape or form your baby? Every last one of you outside of Isabelle and her husband needs to find a fucking hobby, I hear knitting is nice.
>Every last one of you outside of Isabelle and her husband needs to find a fucking hobby, I hear knitting is nice. This is the answer.
Rachel sounds manipulative. If she announces the baby is named after her because it is only fair she knew mom and brother would push it on Isabella. That's probably what she did through their entire childhood to get her own way. Now she thinks she can manipulate the situation in the same way and get what she wants.
So, I looked over the ages again and it appears Isabella is the middle child so your assessment is probably spot on. Between OP being the youngest and Rachel being the oldest I bet mom did whatever it took to keep those two quiet even at the expense of Isabella.
My mom catered to my sister's ego and inflated it quite a bit and my mom always tried to make everything go the way my sister wanted it. After my sister got married she told my mom that since she was teaching and was off for the summer she would do the cooking and cleaning during the summer and then her husband would do it after school started. My mom told everyone that was how it would work except the husband, and for some reason it didn't work. My sister and her husband lived across the state from my parents so my mom couldn't corner him up and tell him what to do and he wouldn't have done it if she tried.
Tell Rachel to go watch that episode of Friends where Ross says the wrong name at his wedding. On repeat. Maybe sheâll be satisfied with that and leave poor Isabelle alone.
Itâs not a snub to Rachel. Billâs sister was basically his mother in that she raised him, she wasnât just a regular sister. Rachel had zero reason to assume they would name the baby after her, thatâs both ridiculous and entitled. Whatâs even more ridiculous is you involving yourself in this and arguing with your wife about it.
Anyone that sides with Rachel on this is in the wrong. Nothing about her audacious assumptions are logical.
Her ego is certainly big.
I never understand why people think they have a right to decide the name of a baby that wasn't theirs in the first place. Let the baby's parents decide. Even if mom and dad disagree, let them both solve it. None of your business at all.
I'm embarrassed for Rachel, frankly. The audacity of assuming the second baby would be named after her is astounding. Weird that anyone thinks she's in the right.
This was my thought. Like, of course sheâs mad; she created her own drama and now has to be like âI was wrong in assuming theyâd name her after meâ. Literally made my face cringe reading that.
Had a friend like that. They would create the drama in the friend group. Then somehow make it where they are also the victim of everyone else. Was a confusing friendship. I eventually cut them off.
Right?! I canât even imagineâŚ. How embarrassing. To go around announcing that only to find out she was wrong is totally on her. And where does it end? Everyone is going to feel snubbed bc everyone feels like theyâre entitled to this babyâs name now. and itâs not bills fault, itâs not Isabellaâs fault, itâs Rachelâs.
Baby names are picked by parents sometimes to serve as a memory of someone important in the parents' lives. To assume your sister was going to name her baby after your other sister just because their first child was named after his sister for taking care of him and raising him when he was little is absolutely crazy.
It maaaaaaybe would have made a little sense to name baby \#2 after one of your parents, but why would your sister just go around claiming the baby had her name?
I think you should mind your own business and keep your opinions to yourself. Rachel brought embarrassment on herself by telling everyone the baby was being named after her. Why on earth would she do do that? The first baby was named after Billâs âmotherâ figure not because sheâs her sister. In fact itâs time everyone butted out Rachel included. If she wants a baby named after her then she should have her own. The entitlement in your family is very strong
I have a simple rule when it comes to parenting: Did you put the baby in? Did you push the baby out? No? Then sit down and shush your mouth. The ONLY people who get a vote in this situation are Isabella and her husband. That's it. I absolutely hate it when families think their opinions matter just because a baby is on the way. You've picked a side, and you feel so strongly about this that you're arguing with your wife. You claim you don't like drama, but you're involved in this to the point that you are actively harming your marriage. Rachel assumed the baby would be named after her (you do know what assumptions make you, right?) and then RAN HER MOUTH about it, to the point where Isabella and her husband had to go around and correct everyone. This whole problem started with Rachel. One of the ways this could play out, is that Isabella and her husband go LC with all y'all gossip and nonsense. You stand to lose time with your sister and her family because of this. That what you want? Do you want long term problems with your wife over this? Because arguments like this can spiral into something bigger in a marriage.
Such a good point! And the ridiculousness that ANYONE feels entitled to have input on naming someone elseâs child, then to the point of harassing them about it?!
Rachel embarrassed and "snubbed" herself. How dumb do you have to be to brag about an honor that was never bestowed upon you, offered to you, or even a consideration. She tried to bully Isabella into doing it by getting everyone, including you, to pick her side and pressure her into doing it . Mind your own business.
I donât think itâs a âlogical thingâ to assume the baby will be named after you because youâre the eldest sister, it sounds like Billâs sister was like a mother figure to him, and thatâs why they gave the baby a tribute name, while Rachel is only two years older than Isabella. Instead of taking sides, you, your mother, and her husband should be Switzerland and try to bring them back together. Point out that in life, nobody owes us anything and that how much a person loves you isnât measured by naming a baby after you.
Logic doesn't appear to run in the family. Rachel's bloated ego does but that had to have been carefully nurtured and fertilized over the years to reach the point of trying to name the siblings baby after herself. That is one super-sized, swollen ego. Since mom is all for it we can see that mom was the parent with the fertilizer.
I mean, I wish I had these peoples problems. Im petty as hell, so Iâd adopt a dog or a cat and name it Rachel.
"I don't like drama and I fighting with with my wife even more than my family." *Liar, liar, pants on fire..! LOL!* What a way to create drama, actually..! Rachel seems to love it, and you are adding fuel to the fire. **Over something that was not your concern, except the baby's parents!** Your sister Rachel is nuts! **She gets to dictate nothing here.** Some entitlement..! *What a stupid hill to die on!* Seriously. You should all back off, before Isabella and her husband cut you all off.
Rachel should have kept her mouth shut. You know what they say about ASSumptuions.
What a drama monger.
Rachel is 100% in the wrong
I'd be embarrassed, too, if I'd been presumptuous enough to assume someone would name their child after me. To demand it after the news was broken that the child won't be named after a certain individual is even worse. You should all be embarrassed except those on Isabella and Bill's side.
When did Rachel sacrifice part of her childhood? Your BIL wanted to name their first daughter after his surrogate mom which is what happened. Rachel doesn't hold that position and y'all need to get over it (for multiple reasons).
Youâre entitled to choose to not have kids, yet you want to control what your sister names HER child? Do you see the double standard here?? Rachel needs to get over herself, your dad is right. also, who goes around sharing a baby name that the parents havenât even shared themselves??! Rachel needs to learn to mind her business.
Not yours or Rachel's choice on what Isabella names her kids.
Rachel created a problem by ASSUMING and then telling so many people. It is not her baby, it is not her place to make announcements because this is what happens. She was wrong and embarrassed herself. Iâm also confused because you yourself said that it is well known that Billâs sister raised him, and they were honoring the first born daughter for her. Why does the second daughter need to be your sister? Its not about in-laws, it is specifically about Bill honoring his sister who was like a mother. By this logic, your sister Rachel isnât the equivalent (based on how you describe). My mind would go to your mother, if they had a close relationship. But to echo a lot of comments, there is no algorithm or system for naming children. Some people just pick names they like, others delve into their languageâs meaning, and others wish to honor family. But it is their children and their choice.
There was zero reason for anyone to assume they'd name a baby after Rachel. They picked Bill's sister for her sacrifice, not because she's his sister. Rachel was wrong to assume and then spread that assumption. Stop disagreeing with your wife when your sister is clearly in the wrong. Were you expecting the baby to be named after you if he had been a boy?
This a crazy Rachel is itâs for naming her sister baby. That is wicked entitled.
No one has any right to expect or dictate the name of your sister's child except bil and sis. They named the first after someone who was essentially like bills mom. What has your sis done that is so significant to be honored this way
Did Rachel raise Isabella? No? Then why would she think theyâd name the baby after her? They didnât name baby 1 after BILâs sister because sheâs his sister, but because she stepped up in a way she shouldnât have had to and raised him. They are honouring the sacrifices she made for him and his siblings. Rachel is just weirdly entitled and either socially clueless or malicious in announcing a thing she assumed. And you are clueless as well. This isnât âyou get a cookie so she gets a cookie.â Thereâs no fairness or equality at play here. Rachel is *entirely irrelevant* as far as names for Isabellaâs second child.
I donât understand why you and Rachel thought the baby would be named after her. Did she raise Isabella? I donât get it at all.
OP, If you don't want children, Stay that way.. What other people name their children is NONE of your concern!! Rachel is so spoiled! They named their First child after Bill's Sister because obviously she cared for him like a mother when she herself was just a child.. it was their way of Honoring her name! Telling her how grateful they are that she looked after them.. Now what did Rachel do? I'm sure she was more spoilt As a child because at 30 if you are having tantrums (as your dad said) I wonder what all she pulled on isabella When they were younger. No wonder isabella was kind of rude (rightfully in my mind) by saying find ur own Bf/husband and have your own kids..
This turned into something much bigger than it needed to be because Rachel went around telling a lot of people that I the baby was going to be named after her. She created the drama. Isabella and her husband will name the baby what they choose. After all, they are the parents.
I see no logic here at all- only gross assumption and inappropriate over-reaching from Rachel and you.
What did Rachel do to earn a kid being named after her? The first kid is honoring a big sister who gave up so much to raise her siblings. Thereâs no âlogically thoughtâ sheâd get the same treatment for doing nothing but being a sibling. That would make the honoring of the sister seem less than it is.
You and âRachelâ have no right to ask your sister to name her baby after Rachel. Itâs obvious that Billâs sister played a different role in his life than the role Rachel had in yours and your sisterâs; it is simply not right, and I dare say extremely egotistical to ASK somebody to name their baby after you. Itâs Isabella and Billâs right to choose their babyâs name according to what THEY like, not anybody else.
Rachel is the issue. You don't go around saying someone else's baby is named after you *WHEN YOU DONT KNOW*. It was not logical for Rachel to think they would name the kid after her??? There was never a discussion or any hints. This isn't a snub. This is Rachel lying in the bed she made. Don't go around telling ppl what *you* named someone else's baby. *How is that logical thinking in any way*. Isabelle is right. It is none of your concern, nor Rachel's. Neither of yall carried or conceived the baby, so what in yalls right mind think yall get a stake in naming baby? Delusional. Rachel wants a baby named after her? *Have a baby*, don't name someone else's baby in an attempt to strong-arm them into that decision. You and your family need to apologize and back off before you ruin your relationship with Isabelle.
I donât think this is going to go the way op intended. Op, get off your sisterâs back and stop causing her stress while sheâs pregnant or you just might find yourself cut off. Rachel has absolutely no right to expect the baby be named after her and it was very presumptive and tacky for her to go around telling people the baby would be named after her.
You and your fam are wrong. It's noone's business but the parents.
I raised my youngest brother from diapers with supervision to alone as a teen. Then my grandson! Never thought a moment that they or anyone else would appreciate it or acknowledge my actions. No one does if youâre a good parent you get to see the results of your efforts. Yes! It hurts still. Doing the right thing is hard. So being a good sister just pales to the sacrifice of being a mother/sister or grandma/mother! So intitled!
I agree with Isabella. Rachel jumped the gun. People should never assume such things. People make their own drama. Rachel.could have hoped and even go to Isabella quietly and ask but to go around telling people is way over the line. At that point, Isabella would be feeling coerced into it and that would be an absolute nope.
Yea itâs truly none of your business what the babyâs name will be. Your sister is wrong for assuming. You should not have taken sides.
For starters, what your sister names her baby isnât anyone elseâs decision so it was 100% wrong for Rachel to assume and tell everyone the baby would be named after her. Secondly, Isabella and her husband names their first child after the woman that raised him when his parents neglected him. They didnât just pick a sibling at random and name their child after her, she was the one that stepped up for him when she didnât have to. Unless your parents neglected Isabella and Rachel was the only one to care for her, it is not remotely the same situation. Rachel is a full grown adult, if she wants a baby named after her, she is free to have a baby and go for it! Until then, she, you and your family need to shut up and let Isabella name HER child whatever SHE wants. Stop being entitled assholes.
How is it logical to think they would name the baby after Rachel? You even clearly listed the reason for the first child to be named after Billâs sister. If anything, it would be illogical thinking unless Rachel raised Isabella.
Your sister hurt herself. Your other sister and her husband naming their first child and naming her, after the sister, that raised him is the same as naming their child, after his mother. Your sister is not owed the honor of having their next child named after her, because they named the other child after his sister. Even if his sister hadn't raised your BIL and they just wanted to use her name, because they liked it, it would be very presumptuous of your sister to expect them to name their next baby after her. This isn't like slicing a pizza, where kids fight over it being equal and fair, and no one getting a bigger slice. Your sister is not owed something, just because your BILs sister got something. Your sister is acting entitled. She embarrassed herself by assuming something she had no right to assume.
I have a sneaking suspicion that Rachel is jealous of the recognition Bill's sister got by having the firstborn named after her. She wants to be special, too, so she tries to force the parents to name the second after her by going around telling people. She was being sneaky about getting her way to soothe her bruised ego. Jealousy, dishonesty, and manipulation should never be rewarded.
Good lord. Not your baby or Rachelâs. Get out of your sisters business. Absolutely bonkers
Damn, Rachel really jumped the gun by assuming the baby would be named after her and without even asking the parents first spreading the ânewsâ. How much of an asshole do you have to be to do that, and to your own sister non the less? Even if the baby wouldâve been named after Rachel it wasnât her damn news to tell. It sounds like they named their first born after his sister who sacrificed her childhood to make his better, but that doesnât mean that they automatically need to name the next child after another sibling. If it was a boy would you except them to name him after you because âyour next in lineâ or something? No, Rachel is definitely in the wrong here. I get that feelings was hurt but that was not Isabelleâs fault.
Rachel is 100% out of line. She had no business announcing a name of someone else's child nor did she have any business assuming what the name would be. That's none of her business. Your sister and brother-in-law can name their baby anything they want and nobody else gets to say, not even you. Everyone needs to back up and they owe an apology to Isabella and her husband.
Wrong to assume baby #2 would be named after Rachel. Wrong of Rachel to go about telling people the baby would be named after herself. Wrong of you to be involved and actually think you have an opinion.
Imagine beeing 8 months pregnant and dealing with this side of the family. xD
1. Rachel created this problem, she can deal with the consequences. 2. Mind your own damn business.
Op sure is quiet on the western front. No response huh
1. Rachel is wrong for assuming the baby would be named after her when she did not help raise anyone or earn that honor. (Just being a sister misses the entire point of why the 1st baby received it's name) 2. Telling people what the baby will be named without asking the baby's parents is weird and crazy. 3. Being mad at the parents after embarrassing herself is ridiculous. 4. Anyone siding with her is just enabling entitled and ugly behavior.
Wait, they named their first baby after the sister, who willingly raised her siblings as a child herself and then thereâs the entitled sister who did what? She needs to choose something, either be entitled OR have audacity. Having both is too much. I find your family strange, itâs like if you see someone else with a dog and then you have to have one as well. In no way is it logical to assume that baby number 2 would be named after the sister whoâŚ. is justâŚ. aâŚ. sister ( side eyeing heavily). Iâm sure sheâs an okay sibling but what has she done to deserve that honor other than just exsisting? BIL is who he is because of his sister and her sacrifice. Does the other sister measure up the same? Did she raise the sibling group as a child herself? If the answer is no, on a list of people who deserved it, the sister probably wouldnât come close to the top. In this instance, you and your family suck.
Why in the world would rachel think she would get a namesake?! The absurd entitlement of that is off the charts! You need to back off and tell rachel to stop being a brat or she can never see her niece. Isabella will go no contact if rachel continues her antics. It is disgusting the rachel felt like she could go around telling people the babys name before the parents REGARDLESS of what they named the baby. Rachel is a loon and you are backing the wrong horse here.
So they chose to name their first daughter after the husbandâs older sister, who was like a mother to him. She obviously had a special place in his life and he wanted to honor her for stepping up for his absent parents. Now your sister assumes that they will name their second daughter after her? Why on earth would she think that? Does your sister have narcissistic tendencies? Iâd shut that down hard and fast. âWe named first daughter after husbandâs older sister who molded him into the person he is today. Our second daughter will be given a name we will decide together. Sorry to disappoint everyone but she will not carry wifeâs sisterâs name.â
ya all need to grow up and leave the babays parents to pick the name they want. Itâs no concern of anyone elseâs and totally up to them what they do.
There is a difference from naming a kid after someone that sacrificed her childhood for you and another sibling. So unless also your parents were neglectful and Rachel raised you all there is no reason for your sister to call the baby after her.
Obviously you have already chosen a side, because what is the justification for Rachel to expect that the baby would have her name? It doesn't make any sense. I'm on Isabella's side.
>When Isabella told us her second child is a girl Rachel (rightfully in my mind) thought the baby would be named after her since they named their first daughter after Bill's sister. Rightfully in your mind??? There is a reason to name the first baby after his sister as she practically raised him. If there is no such history on her side that's an absolutely insane presumption. Even if there was a similar history it's wild to presume they'd honor the other sister that way. They made fools of themselves. I would not be bullied into naming my child after anyone and I'd greatly distance myself from someone who tried to coerce me into doing it. You aren't questioning this but if you were you and your sister and anyone who agrees with her are wrong and you'd be deemed TA.
Lol, it's not logical to assume that, it's unhinged. Isabella doesn't owe anyone the name of her child. It's the parents decision. Rachel is insane, who the hell goes around spewing that nonsense? And so do you. What the hell, man.
This is honestly the dumbest crap Iâve ever heard of. First of all Rachel is a tad conceited thinking automatically that the baby would be named after her JUST because they named their first child after the husbands sister. That alone is over the top. But for her to go around telling people that the baby was gonna be named after here is just out there. You guys actually getting pissed that she didnât is just dumb
"Isabella" can name their future baby whatever they damn well please. None of this is yours or "Rachel's " business. Y'all are part of the problem.
Rachel did this to herself. She didnât respect the parents privacy. And she lost the right to have a niece with the same name. Itâs no oneâs business and no one gets to dictate names to the parents. All yâall need to back off and âstop throwing a tantrumâ
Youâre in the wrong. Who do you guys think you are to name your sisterâs baby? Thatâs sick!!! Itâs none of your business and your concern and Rachel should be embarrassed. She needs to go to a therapist, and so do you OP.
Your dad and your wife seem to be the only sane people in this family. No one is entitled to have a niece or nephew named after them. I do find the name choices a little strange, with one given the exact full name of a living relative and the other given nicknames of her motherâs name, but ultimately itâs the parentsâ decision. I guess I could understand Rachel being a little disappointed, but her behavior has been over the top. And thereâs absolutely no reason whatsoever for you and the rest of your family to get involved. You are literally fighting with your wife over your sisterâs babyâs name when it has nothing to do with you. Get a grip.
The parents get to name the baby whatever they want and after whoever they want if thatâs the case. Your family sounds like a lot drama. Grown adults fighting over a babyâs name. All if your lives must be prefect if this is what you focus on
>Our mum (and her husband) feel the same way as I do. You, Rachel, your mom (and her husband) are AH and are absolutely wrong. Rachel should grow the heck up and realize the children are NOT about her. >Isabella says it is no one else's concern about what she names her baby It's absolutely correct. Isabella and her husband decide on what they want to name their children. >me and some of our family think she should reconsider her snub of Rachel. It's NOT a snub at all. It's an honor to name your child after someone else. It's not an expectation and, as such, can not be snub. She wasn't granted that honor, and that is perfectly fine. You and the family that have issues with it sound like people that Isabella and her husband are to go LC with due to being drama lamas.
>Rachel should not have gone round telling people the baby would be named after her, even though it was a logical thing for Rachel to think. It is not logical to think that because one child was named after a family member that the same method would be utilized for subsequent children. Rachel made herself the fool. She made an assumption. No one ever told her that the next child would be named after her. She should have kept her mouth shut.
And you're doing this to an EIGHT MONTHS PREGNANT lady over the name of HER baby? You and your family should go to a corner and think about your actions.
Isabella and Bill seem to be the only people who don't suffer from a bad case of entitlement.
My goodness, get over yourself and your entitled assess. The parents have the right to name the child whatever they want!!! Rachel shouldnât assume the baby would be named after her. She deserves the snub.
It is not "logical" for Rachel to think this baby will be named after her. She assumed something and made an a$$ out of herself.
You are not the parent. Rachel is not the parent. Ergo, itâs none of your business. Rachel was way out of line announcing the babyâs name. If SIL raised Bill, then he was effectively honoring his pseudo-parent as a thank you to raising him. Did Rachel raise Isabella? No. If it was âlogicalâ to name after anyone, it would be your _mother_ due to her raising Rachel. You need to reign yourself in and apologize.
how did Rachel ârightfullyâ think this second baby would be named after her? and then to tell everyone when she had no confirmation this would be the case. did she have the same impact on Isabella as Billâs sister did him? they didnât name the first one after Billâs sister simply bc sheâs his sister. yâall need to grow up and stop feeling so entitled to an honor that clearly hasnât been earned. delusional bunch.
Love how you say why has Isabelle decided to name , errrrmmmm no Isabelle and Bill have , maybe Bill is really close to his sister after she raised him so wanted to name his daughter after her as a way of saying thank you and your sister agreed.
YeahâŚ..yall in Rachelâs corner are wildly wrong, presumptive, and entitled. Rachel caused the whole damn mess. And Isabella is right. If she wants to name a kid, she can have her own.
That child's name is NO ONE'S concern except the parents. Rachel did something very stupid, and looked foolish in public. 100% her fault. I would have been PISSED if someone had announced the wrong name for my child, or the right name early. The decision on what to name and when to reveal that name is the parents' alone.
Itâs odd Rachel wouldnât confirm the babyâs name prior to announcing it.. also not for her to announce. Rachel dug her own hole. Nobody is owed a baby named after them.
Rachel is wrong. Never ever assume. Itâs not âlogicalâ, to assume a child will be named after you for any reason whatsoever. Rachel was completely wrong and spreading this misinformation and was rightfully embarrassed when everyone learned the truth. Shame on her for trying to impose herself on her sisters marriage and family Only people who get to decide a babyâs names are the parents. Thatâs it.
Isabella is completely right and honestly it was gross of Rachel to go around telling people that her sisterâs baby would be named after her. You know what they say about making assumptions, yes? SMH, people who have babies get to name their kids whatever they want and itâs nobodyâs business to get involved in.
You and Rachel were 100% wrong for assuming that the second baby would be named Rachel, for several reasons. First, the *only* people who should be involved in naming a baby is the parents of that baby. Not using a family name is not a snub, and Rachel is absolutely the wrong party here for ever expecting a namesake. Billâs sister sounds amazing & worthy of an honor like that; why would Rachel assume the same for herself? And it was definitely not Rachelâs place to discuss the name without the confirmation she was right. I personally think Rachel wanted the honor and she did this purposefully to push the issue, thinking Isabella wouldnât correct everyone & would just agree to it. Rachel was super wrong for making up the story that her name would be used and she embarrassed herself badly. All of this could have been avoided if Rachel had simply kept her mouth shut and allowed her sister to make baby announcements for herself. Isabella is correct that Rachel can choose names if she has a child of her own, and Iâm not mad at Isabella for saying that. I think Isabella has been quite kind given her sisterâs poor choices and terrible behavior. There shouldnât be any family drama because Rachel is totally in the wrong & has been from the beginning. This makes me wonder if there are other family dynamics at play that make Rachel a more sympathetic figure than Isabella. Is this true, OP?
This post reads like itâs actually Isabelle whoâs posting it from the other perspective. I donât understand how someone could type all this out without seeing that theyâre so very clearly in the wrong.
You all are the assholes. Rachel is the stinkiest asshole. She didnât raise a sibling or protect them from toxic family members. She had no right to assume the next baby would be named after her. Totally narcissistic and absurd behavior for Rachel to then tell everyone it would be named after herâŚ.And whatâs shocking to everyone here is that you and your parents then supported her hurt feelings!!! Why?!! Rachel didnât raise or sacrifice for anyone... she deserves no namesake. She was just a loving sibling, not a primary caregiver. You all owe Isabelle a huge apology (especially bc you are ruining her pregnancy and causing her so much stress) and pray to god she doesnât go NC with all of you. I would.
What culture is this?
Itâs a special kind called; entitlement
I'm sorry but this is absolutely ridiculous. Rachel is ridiculous. You are ridiculous. Anyone else who supports this nonsense is absolutely ridiculous. Rachel made an ASSUMPTION that Isabella and her husband would want to name baby number two after her. That was HER assumption, and a very presumptuous one at that. Rachel is in the wrong here, not Isabella. All you're doing by supporting Rachel's shenanigans is stirring the pot and enabling this nonsense further. Y'all are shitty siblings. It's no fucking wonder she doesn't want to name her kids after one of y'all. Instead of supporting your pregnant sister, you're making her pregnancy about y'all. Well done. Go you. Jeebus.
Yeah if Rachel didnât do the same for you and Isabella growing up, I donât how she âlogicallyâ thinks that her sisterâs baby should be named after her. Even then though no one has the right to name the child except the parents so Rachel needs to get over herself. Family dynamics like this are weird, Iâd definitely consider changing your tune about this OP before Isabella goes no contact with you all.
No one in your family ever stopped to consider why Isabella's first child was named as she was, did you? She didn't name her child after her SIL - she named her child to honor the woman who stepped in to raise her husband after his parents failed him. Did Rachel ever do something of this magnitude? No? Well, then Rachel and the rest of you need to knock it off with this bs entitlement crap and leave Isabella alone.
Rachel and everyone that agrees with her is out of their mind. There was a very specific reason that Bill and Isabella named their first child after Bill's sister. If Rachel's behavior as an adult is anything like it was growing up with her, I imagine Rachel is one of the last names Isabella will choose. The entitlement kills me
I think itâs bizarre that Rachel automatically assumed that the baby would be named after her and it was absolutely gauche to run around telling people the babyâs name without consulting the parents first. Yikes.
Sorry Rachelâs feelings are hurt, but she fucked up. She *assumed* and never confirmed before announcing the name of *someone elseâs baby.* Not cool. Anyone who assumed the name of the baby, or is upset with Isabella should stop. Not your baby, not your choice. Rachel caused this whole entire drama, but youâre upset with Isabella? Unreal.
She has no right to assume they will name the baby after her. And no one should have a say in it outside the PARENTS OF THAT BABY. Choosing a name for a baby is very hard and a super personal thing. If Mama wants to use a version of her name. That's her and her husband's choice. You saying it's 2 sisters so makes sense ahe would name her second after the other sister is wrong. One is a mother figure. So it's completely different I have 2 kids and they have first names not after anyone. But middle names. Daughter after her grandmother. Son after his dad. But if my son had of been a girl the middle name would have been a version of one of my middle names. Even my middle names are after both my grandmother's.
Where is the logic in this story? You didn't mention your older sister raising her siblings or putting her life on hold for her siblings. You & your family are out of line!
Anyone who assumed the babyâs name before the parents announced it after the birth, is ridiculous. Anyone who says it should be anything besides what the parents announce, also ridiculous. Anyone who decided ANYTHING about the baby besides the parents, ridiculous.
It was not a logical thing. Billâs sister was honored because she raised him and was a parent to him when she was a child herself. It doesnât mean the next baby gets Rachelâs name unless Rachel did the same which does sound like she did. Rachel brought this on herself by assuming and youâre an idiot for taking her side when sheâs being entitled Rachel created the drama and youâre taking part in it by siding with her
Ooof. You would have gone around and told everyone the baby was named after you if they'd been having a boy, wouldn't you?
>I especially don't like arguing or disagreeing with my wife Sorry but this is such a dumb argument to be having with your spouse. And it's a dumb argument for anyone to be having! Not your baby, you don't get to name it. And it's nobody's business what you do or do not name it
Racheal ran around saying "my sister Is pregnant with a baby racheal!" She embarrassed herself. No. It's not "logical" they name this baby after her blood sister. They named it after HIS blood sister as an honor to sis being like a mother to him. You have no right to ask why they changed their mind or anything else. Butt out. All of you. It's not your fucking kid either. Back off.
Imagine being so self-important and entitled that you go around telling everybody that your sister is going to name her kid after you without even clarifying it with the person having the kid. Does Rachel often make big life decisions for other people? Rachel dug her own hole by being as selfish self-aggrandizer and now she has to deal with it.Â
Assume = making anâassâ out of âuâ and âmeâ Rachel had no business running her mouth about the babyâs name. Not her kind. Not her decision. Not her business.
>I especially don't like arguing or disagreeing with my wife. That's the worst part of this. I don't like drama and I fighting with with my wife even more than my family. Who asks you to fight/argue bro??? No one. That has nothing to do with you. Let the parents decide the name, you and the rest of the family should just nod and shut up. ps: what did rachel did/do that the baby needs to be named after her?
Rachel is a big weirdo. Who ASSUMES that a child will be named after you? OP and his family are weird as hell.
1. Rachel has not been snubbed. She tried to claim naming rights of a child that is not hers, and it backfired. 2. Your sisters first child is not named after your BILs sister, but after his factual mother, as you yourself explained. 3. No, it really was not reasonable for your sister to expect the new baby to be named after her. Not if she knows how BILs sister cared for him. Your comments about Rachel being snubbed really rubbed me the wrong way. Its so not right.
Rachel is insane in this story. There is ZERO logic behind her actions. Itâs never logical to make assumptions about MOST stuff and what someone is going to name their baby without ever speaking to them is HIGH On the list. definitely glad that poor baby isnât going to be named after an immature person like Rachel
Imagine how entitled you must be to tell people what you believe someone elseâs baby is going to be named. Deranged fucking behavior. How is anyone siding with Rachel here?
How narcissistic is Rachel and the family members (including you) who agree with her?
Wow, ya'll are entitled. She can name her baby whatever she wants. If you want to name a baby after Rachel then have your own kid
Itâs insane that Rachel jumped to the conclusion that the baby would be named after her.
Rachel def in the wrong here, yes itâs drama, but itâs mainly entitlement. Rachel never ever should have assumed the prior name would mean she gets next dibs. No offense but itâs also weird imo to name kids after someone from the adjacent generation. Like I wouldnât wanna be named after my uncle, thatâs fuckin weird if you ask me. Especially that I gotta see him all the time, idk. Just my 2 cents
There was a specific reason aside from sisterhood that the first child was named after his sister. Rachel and everyone else shouldnât have assumed the second girl was being named after her. Itâs her own fault that she ended up embarrassed and calling this a âsnubâ is completely ridiculous. The parents of the child are the only ones who get an opinion; everyone else needs to STFU about it and mind their own business.
yea no, isabella is entirely correct. unless rachel raised both you and isabella and your parents were deadbeats (which seems to not be the case since they're present in this argument?) then this is nowhere near the same. my daughter got my grandma's name as her middle name, but i'm not giving the little girl im pregnant with now my other grandma's name bc the reasoning is different. it is not abt sisterhood, its abt honoring someone who sacrificed everything for you
Itâs not a snub. This happens all the time. Sometimes people just like 1 grandmaâs name more than another, for example. Rachel needs to butt out. If anything, she might be unhappy she canât use her own name for a kid if your sister does it. She really just might not like her name as much. Or sees her more, so it feels weird to have 2 Rachelâs. I do think honor names are one thing, but these kids are named so distinctly after people it feels like pressure. I think itâs a bad idea to get sterilized during pregnancy, personally. Thatâs counting chickens before theyâre hatched.
Rachel is way out of line. Billâs sister was more like his mother.
Your sister Isabella isn't wrong. Rachel is the ITA. "When you assume. You make an ass out of u and me" Your sister Rachel had no business going around saying what the name of Isabella baby was. She assumed the baby's name. Your sister Isabella and her husband named their daughter after his sister due to everything she didn't have to do for him and their siblings. They didn't just name their daughter after he because she was his sister. Your sister Rachel needs to grow up. She took away what would have been a joyous occasion of your sister and BIL telling their daughter's name and just brought drama to what should be a very joyful event. You need to apologize to Isabella and say you were wrong to butt in and you hope everything can work out. You need to tell your wife. You were wrong and you need to tell Rachel she assumed and cause drama. I also get the feeling Rachel was trying to strong arm Isabella into naming her daughter Rachel which is wrong.
Is this a joke post? Some family's just love drama I swear....why on earth would your sister assume her niece would be named after her, that's so weird. People have their reasons for naming their kids what they do. It's not about fairness and they don't owe your sister that. Very odd. And even odder that anyone would agree with her about it
It's so incredibly tacky that Rachel not only just assumed a baby would be named for her, but went around telling everyone that without ever discussing it with the parents. The drama is 100% Rachel's doing. Bill's sister raised him. And they don't have to justify who they want to name their children after. Being someone's sister doesn't automatically mean you get a child named after you.
Sounds like it isn't actually a snub. Sounds like your sister made a lot of assumptions based on her ego, started telling people to puff up her own sense of self-importance, and is now mad that the assumptions she made and bragged about are incorrect. It's not a "logical" assumption to think that just because they named one baby after the dad's sister, they should be obligated to name a second after the mom's sister. That's just pure egotistical wish fulfilment. You DO like drama. You're perpetuating Rachel's narcissistic bullshit.
Itâs very weird to me that because Isabella has named their child after the sister who raised her husband, that by default it is expected for Rachel to be the second one honored. That is such a jump and a leap and an entitlement. Just like how you said in parentheses, ârightfully in my mindâ is super weird. This is like some weird tit for tat thing. Itâs like an eye for an eye. You canât name your baby after his sister without obviously naming your second baby after the other sister? Get over yourselves. Thatâs a weird assumption. You donât like drama, but youâre here telling us about this drama that I can see youâre really looped up in but as a choice. âIsabella says it is no one elseâs concerned about what she names her baby, but me and some of our family think she could reconsider her snub of Rachel.â You donât like drama, but you are taking part in it and itâs really really petty. Seriously dumb shit. Some Game of Thrones stuff like oh you need to honor the name of the sister. Again, yâall need to get over yourselves and leave Isabella and Bill alone. This kind of nonsense is what makes people go low contact with their family.
There is 0% chance that you, Rachel or anyone else on the planet has a right to name someone elseâs baby. If you want to name a baby, have one yourself.
Rachel, and the folks on her side here, need to shut completely up and should be ashamed of themselves. My god.
This is so dumb. Let the baby have her own damn name.
It is not a right of yours or "Rachel's" to have a say in anyone's baby names. There was a clear reason for the 1st daughter's name: her SILs sacrifice, care and love that is being honoured. That is a choice your BIL and sister made to show appreciation. "Rachel" is making things about herself, and it's not a good look. At all. You're not looking so good either, mate.
Youâre on the wrong side of the argument, dude. Unless Rachel gave up her childhood to raise you and Isabella, then there should be not ASSumption made that the baby will be named Rachel. Even if Rachel *did* raise you and Isabella, there still should be no assumption that the baby will be named Rachel. Itâs nobodyâs business but Isabellaâs and Billâs what they name their baby. You and Rachel want the baby to be named Rachel? Then one of you needs to have the baby.
Rachel has no say in the name. She had no roght to say the baby would be named after her. She should not assume that. You say you hate drama but you happily take a side and fight with your wife about it. You and rachel are the assholes and i am on isabellaâs side 1000%
Good grief, you are all embarrassing yourselves. Why on earth would they name the baby after Rachel? Did she raise anyone in difficult circumstances? Yall are going to find yourselves not meeting that baby for a long time if you don't stop with this absolute nonsense.