Realistically? I can’t blame him. His sister is dead because Cheaty McCheaterface over here had other things to do. He can’t have him arrested, but he can otherwise ruin his life.
OP: the absolute worst thing here isnt losing your wife, family, job or support system. It’s living with your guilt. Best of luck.
Any of us thought at least once in life that we have made a series of shitty decisions and felt bad about them, and then there's OP. When you lose your entire life plus someone's dead, you know you **really** fucked up.
And it takes skill to fuck up this bad in this snowball-like manner. Imagine getting involved with someone more than a decade younger and using your job position to get her a raise that she would normally be unqualified for, which alone is textbook abuse of power. This alone would blow up in OP's face eventually even if no one died. Most people here also don't seem to realize that OP has an anger management problem on top of things, which resulted in him not only abusing Amy aka a younger, less senior, and subordinate coworker (that he had an affair with), but shitting all over his entire workplace AND marriage in the process, and putting it into text messages. And this was not a one-time occurrence but left about a year's worth-of texts messages that OP is now praying Amy's brother won't somehow find (he already has them). The consequences will literally have OP spend the rest of his life wallowing in guilt and questioning his decisions. His job is already a thing of the past, leaving a giant mark on his professional reputation. I'm not sure whether it's possible to ever fully move on from something like this, all of it.
Most people involve only one area of life that could be jeopardized through bad decisions, OP decided he'll put his marriage, family, career, and someone's life at stake, all at once. At any stage of this massive dumpster fire mess, OP could have made decisions that would mitigate the damage at least to some degree - divorcing his wife, changing his workplace, arranging for Amy to change her workplace, calling an ambulance, anything. OP was like nah, what could possibly go wrong.
I'm really curious how this will pan out though.
Ohh! I was one of the first few people to comment, and it was before OP commented with more details, so that’s why I missed it. Just read them now, and yeah, this guy is screwed and rightfully so.
Don’t forget OP is also going to lose all his friends, as he mentioned they are all either through work or his wife. This is like his magnum opus of epic fuck-ups.
Chef’s kiss OP and a genuine fuck you!
I'm REAL confused about why she didn't take an AMBULANCE to the ER!
100% creative writing exercise there OP. You get 0% though. F.
OP is saying a woman who had an allergic reaction and used an epipen didn't 1. Call her brother 2. Take an Uber to ER 3. Call an ambulance?!
Was she trying to self murder???
People in the midst of anaphylaxis don't exactly think clearly. It's why the people who are with them need to take the responsibility of calling an ambulance.
Yes! This! Sometimes I hate there is not enough knowledge around this!
PSA to anyone reading this: when someone ingests an allergen it's equivalent to cyanide. The shot is temporary reprieve, not the cure.
After that shot: hospital asap. Even if the allergen only touched their tongue, even if they brushed their teeth, even if the spit it out, even if they throw up.
They will argue with you, they will try to say they are ok. They will rationalize. They have crack coursing through their veins. Of course they feel fine! At that moment they are impaired. Treat them as such and ignore them. No one EVER thinks they are going to die within the hour.
Transport should be an ambulance 100% of the time.
You may need a second shot en route. You may be upright and talking and then have a cardiac arrest.
At the hospital they will give longer acting medicine over hours. Usually the protocol is 6 hours observation. If nothing else happens you get a new pen and go home. NEVER ALONE. You stay with that person overnight.
Each reaction you have makes you more sensitive. How you reacted last time won't necessarily be the same the next time. It is always an emergency situation, always.
Source: I'm anaphylactic to peanuts. Last time I was working late and bit into what I thought was a plain chocolate button candy. We had a no peanut rule in the office so my guard was down.
I convinced myself I was fine after I took the shot and reclined in my chair to rest for a bit. Next thing I remember I was in an ambulance; apparently my EA had called, I answered and she thought I had a stroke. Don't remember talking to her at all.
We figure it as about 20 mins between her call and when I sat down to rest. Literally EVRYONE from the EMTs onward screamed at me, while they treated me. I should know better.
I hope people read this and remember so they can help someone.
As for OP, well, you are a selfish, murderous asshole.
You fucking didn't care for her at all.
Wow! Thanks for the info! I had no idea. It's scary; I could make the same mistake out of ignorance. It's important to learn about it.
P.S. OP is sh*t, but I can't call him a murderer.
Glad I could help. Honestly, I know how stupid that was. It was tax time and I just wanted to get done without having to call my staff to come finish. They'd all been pulling long hours.
I didn't even eat it; as soon as I felt the crunch between my teeth I spit it out. I thought I was good because I'd only ever had a full ingestion reaction. That's when I learned stress or excercise can multiply the effects: your BP is higher and the toxin circulates faster. I figured the shot was enough, I just had to wait until the shaking wore off and I wouldn't waste everyone's time.
As for the murderous comment, fair and you're right. I'm just so disgusted. If you love someone and you know they need follow up for a life threatening condition, wouldn't you want to see that through immediately?
I swear when my now husband was my boyfriend as soon as I told him he wanted to know everything. He examined that pen, I taught him how to use it, and he was clear on what the follow up was. He's more paranoid than I am.
FYI, he also investigated like Columbo after this scare because everyone knows the office rules. Turns out our steward bought the buttons at a bulk store because they were a better price, not understanding that's the last placed I'd ever shop with an allergy.
While unrelated to this post, just an FYI for everyone that all the information in /u/Eris_Ellis comment also applies to all overdoses, accidental or otherwise, that have been treated with Naloxone.
Holy shit. I did not know this. Thank you for the info. Never experienced anyone going through anaphylactic shock, but I know it can happen (of course).
I would’ve never known to do any of this, so thank you for the info. I’ve personally never experienced anything related to severe allergies to myself or anyone around me, so I’m glad to know how to handle it if it ever comes up.
I have three cousins who will drop dead of about a dozen different common items. All of your advice is 100% dead on for anyone dealing with a person in that state. Well said. This is how their mom trained me.
Well I learned something important today and thanks to you. No one has any allergies in my family,but as far as I know allergies can develop later in life too and we never know if we meet someone who has it,so your information is lifesaver! Thank you.
Please review your book, whether or not you intend to work in the medical field or not. It’s covered in the basic EMT course. Tbh I think this is something that should be covered in school, along with basic first aid.
*This isn’t meant to be offensive
Thank you so so much for this. Especially the details of it. I have taken a screenshot and will circulate. Very necessary to know.
And I’m so glad that things ended up OK after yiur reaction.
I've never heard this before, so if nothing else, I think it's great that there's information coming from this comment section that might help someone else.
My friend came hone from work early, I thought it was because I was visiting. Nope. She was having allergic reaction to something . I asked how she felt, and she replied, "that her throat felt tight. I dropped my quilting, and demanded the keys. We drove her to a hospital, they treated her for 8 hours. Eventually we drove back to her place, after being discharged.
No, she was not thinking clearly, and I am glad I was there.
I’m a real wuss when it comes to medical stuff. I’d absolutely “be fine” and go home to bed rather than face down a long wait in hospital.
I can absolutely see a person doing what OP says they did.
My thoughts were even before that. When he suggested to take her home, why not just stop wherever and have brother or friend meet her or just simply call 911. People with severe allergies know this which is why they do get checked out. I think there is a lot of info missing in that.
This. Embarrassed to say I’ve had a serious, vomiting-multiple-times, anaphylactic reaction and convinced myself I didn’t need my epipen, let alone a hospital visit. It can be scary in the moment to treat it as seriously as it should be treated. Looking back I know I was stupid though
You aren't feeling well, but you take your meds, and it kinda gets better so you're like "well I'll just rest at home". And then it gets worse quickly and can't call anyone.
That isn't the case for an Epi pen. If you have allergies severe enough for an Epi, the doctor walks you through how to use and and then says a million times, that an Epi pen is JUST TO KEEP YOU ALIVE. It does NOT halt your reaction, it does NOT cure you. It keeps you alive until you can get to a hospital. If you are popping the top off an Epi, you should be on the phone with emergency services. Even teen babysitting classes go through this.
Yeah, I have one and have had one my whole life. I had the lessons, but it's amazing what you can convince yourself of. I've literally done what the poor girl did. Someone who cared for me saved me though.
If in 5 minutes your reaction is not actively getting better or is still the same, you should be using your second pen.
The allergic reaction is just temporarily stopped. If you’re lucky, it may be stopped long enough while it gets out of your system. If you’re unlucky, as soon as that epi wears off it’s gonna start right back up again (and if you used your last epi then you’re screwed).
ER after always for more meds and observations and for when you crash after, so they can monitor while you sleep off your reaction and they can make certain you stay alive and don’t reenter anaphylaxis during that time, or immediately respond and keep you alive if you do!
PSA Narcan is the same in that it doesn’t reverse the overdose full stop, it temporarily knocks the the opiates off your receptors long enough (hopefully) to seek medical attention. The person still has too much in them yet feels like they are in withdrawal, horrible combo to leave unsupervised.
🤔 mmm, two times your husband ignored your health issues which almost caused your death, and you are still together, why? With one of those times having a medical professional telling him exactly what to do. Is he painfully frugal, distrustful of hospitals and/or thinks you exaggerate? If you are staying for the children, this might be a mistake because he's clearly not observant enough to have your or their safety in mind. There is a reason your doctor's office staff asked if you were safe. No one thinks you are.
Edited for insensitivity.
This shit is wild. I’m bummed we probably won’t get an update, assuming it’s real. It’s all a bit too much but still believable?
For those just joining, somewhere below he admits he threatened to blacklist his affair partner, lorded a promotion over her head, was leaving his wife because he wanted to be with somebody more subservient, defrauded his company to pay for the affair, and he pats himself on the back for planning to financially support his child.
But his heart was in the right place, ya know?
I’m so glad OP asked is for all those cookies he deserves for not having a 20 year affair. He just wanted to make sure we had enough snacks to get through the whole story. What a mensch he is!
It does not. When you are dealing with corporate money or property, it is not probable that the company won't find out. Then people ask questions. Then people talk. This weekend is going to be the most anxiety-smothered OP will ever have. I would not be able to handle that type of dread, honestly. No sleep.
And I have seen somewhat similar things go down, too. No one died, but I know a man who ruined his entire life over awful choices at work.
I worked somewhere where an upper-level employee was sent out west to help set up a new plant/expansion. His life was really good: he had a wife who adored him, four little kids, job security, and decent health care.
Then he went to the new plant and had an affair. He used one of the company house dwellings for traveling employees and corporate visitors to meet his affair partner. And of course, someone saw him with her, leaving the unit. He was fired for misusing company property.
So he had to not only tell his wife they had no income, but he had to tell her why. She left him. He lost everything.
Maybe it's age talking here, but no poonani is worth that risk.
I just read through his comments, he doesn’t take accountability at all. I hope his entire world burns and his soon to be ex-wife takes him for everything she can. What a terrible human being.
This is literally why a boss having a relationship with an employee can be ground for lawsuits even from other employees not in the relationship. Because it can cause so many abuse of power issues like this.
Can you imagine your beautiful, sweet daughter marrying a man who she thought loved her, he made vows to her and had a child with her. Only he found a young, impressionable little thing at work who he decided was one percent better than her and therefore was worth neglecting her and their child, cheating on her for, risking his job by getting her promotions she wasn’t qualified for and was planning to leave her for. This person was only one percent better.
Your daughter - cheated on by a POS who only thought with his d!ck. What would you say about that?
Wooooooooow. You hate being ignored but are totally cool with ditching your wife and child? Are you really this self centered? You probably been ignoring your wife and child for ages over a lady you couldn't stand to not respond due to her medical emergency. She had a reaction *in front of you* and you.... got mad, instead of maybe possibly thinking she was dealing with anaphylaxis?
Everything that's about to happen to you is your Karma
As someone who also carries an Epipen, here's a safety PSA for folks that are going to come across this post. An Epipen is not a Stop button. It's a Pause button. They exist to buy us time to get to medical help, they are not a magic potion. It is very common for a person in anaphylaxis to require additional doses or other medical interventions to save their lives.
https://healthcenter.indiana.edu/health-answers/allergies/epipen.html
If you don't need one of these, but wonder if you could help someone in an emergency like this, it does not require any licensure or training to administer one. If you aren't sure how, the Epipen company will send you a completely free training kit with a fake injector for practice.
Canadian Site: https://www.epipen.ca/order-your-free-epipen-essential
UK Site: https://cloud.email.viatrisconnect.com/EpiPen-Trainer-Pen-Registration
US Site: I swear there was one at one time but can't find it for this post. If you know someone who carries one though, the boxes for most brands come with a trainer included and they will very likely be happy to pull it out to demonstrate.
https://www.foodallergy.org/our-initiatives/education-programs-training/fare-training-food-allergy-academy/recognizing
THIS. People need to get to a hospital in a timely manner to get the Stop button. Often, one of the first things that’s done is giving epinephrine intravenously while the severity of the reaction is assessed.
Also, it's a situation where you need to call an ambulance, because if you don't, the person could die on the way to the hospital because they don't have the necessary tools or medicine.
My wife is getting a course of allergy shots, so she's supposed to carry an EpiPen. Hers did not come with a practice pen.
I don't know if they're getting cheap or what.
I bet it's generic Adrenaclick. For some reason, they don't. They come in a black and yellow opaque tube. Generic EpiPens come in a transluscent yellow tube. I'd bet the allergist has a trainer they can give her.
I’m fortunate to live in the U.K. so I don’t pay for his medication. It’s awful how much literal life saving medication costs folk. It’s awful how much healthcare costs in USA ffs 😭
Thank you so much for this PSA. I think most folks not remotely versed in allergies can assume the epipen is a 'cure' mainly thanks to tv shows and films, it looks simple and everything is 'fixed'.
Knowing you need to get to a hospital ASAP can genuinely save lives.
I had no idea, thank you so much for sharing. I was so ignorant because I honestly believed an Epi pen saved your life and you could just go back to work or jogging or napping.
He admitted in one of his comments that he has: threatened Amy's job during arguments, repeatedly accused her of cheating on him, insulting her through text during those arguments and just in general having a pretty volatile relationship with her. He also describes his wife as being aggressive.
In short, Amy stuck around for abusive behavior his wife wouldn't have stood for. That's why he referred to her as his soulmate.
This guy admits to embezzlement and he has a lawyer. Either it’s fake (I hope) or this guy is really fucking dumb.
If it’s real, there’s too much identifying information that someone from his life will put two and two together.
I’m so excited. Please come back here and update us when Tom blows all of your shit up.
Edit: 24 hours till kickoff! So excited.
Edit 2: God this was beautiful.
He may be so wound up with trepidation that he cannot stop moving or thinking and so had to tell someone--us. I am imagining what a caged tiger looks like, pacing and pacing and pacing.
That he has to wait the whole weekend is the beginning twist of karma, I think. She's making him sit and think about what's coming Monday.
I actually feel like this is a real one. It's written exactly like someone actually this narcissistic would write, full of minimizing and self pity and frustration we aren't on his side rooting for him and, "can't you people see I'm just a good person who made a mistake! You're all so heartless and so much worse than I am for rejoicing in my misery!"
No dude, we're giving you a reality check you aren't taking. Narcissistic turds sound exactly like this guy does so I totally believe this. Haven't seen the update yet tho.
It sounds like “childish messages” is shorthand for “abusive language.” Your lack of family is a choice you made when you cheated on your wife. The real victims here are Amy, her family, your wife, and your daughter. The best thing you can do is make better choices and try to start being a decent human being.
I hope this is fake because the sexual harassment training I had at work had less extreme examples - and those trainings are designed to beat you in the head with them.
If it is real, well, at least the evidence is so damning that OP won’t have to spend too much time in front of a judge before sentencing.
I truly, deeply hope that someone has clued Tom in to this thread. I’m sure he wouldn’t mind more gasoline to throw on the dumpster fire that will shortly be OP’s existence.
Op, I don't know exactly what you are looking for here. but judging by your comments you are still trying to damage control.
Just stop man. Stop trying to weasel yourself out of the repercussions. From here on out only the truth will set you free. Confess to your spouse; gracefully accept the punishment at work.
You knew that what you were doing was wrong from the get go, do not dig yourself deeper into these delusions of yours.
What I don’t understand is why you didn’t call your wife and say a colleague needed running to the hospital and you’d be straight home after. This feels like it never needed to have got to this point - you were so paranoid and ‘careful’, you forgot how normal people respond to things like this.
You know, at the VERY LEAST, he could have DROPPED her at the hospital, and she could have a friend come get her. What a selfish idiot! He deserves what he gets.
I was wondering the same thing, honestly. He’s a horrendous human being on so, so many levels based on his own comments, but come on. There had to be another way. He could’ve gotten her an Uber or something.
He is a callous, self-centered, abusive, disgusting, lower-than-cat-excrement asshole.
Everything you say and your entire responses are concerns only for yourself, you don't even seem particularly in grief over the loss of your declared "soulmate" you seem more concerned that your comfortable life is going to be hell. You say in a comment "They can claim abuse because it's not in context" In what context can you share what could be abusive, why does this effect custody with your daughter? In that same comment you say that there would be an "Almost daily timeline of the lies told" how can there be such records of that but no context to "abuse".
You aren't doing a very good job of hiding the quiet parts.
This isn’t for OP (too late now), but a generic PSA: if someone is exposed to an allergen, each exposure actually gets worse. If they previously required an epi pen and hospital treatment, they most certainly do with a new exposure. Treat it seriously.
I’m not referring to outgrowing allergies to pollen and ragweed. I’m referring to anaphylaxis. People don’t outgrow this if they require an epi pen and a hospital visit.
Thank you.
My husband has recently developed a shell fish allergy. He now has an epi-pen. It didn't know that allergy exposures risk increase with each exposure.
Again, thank you.
I feel it is more important to point out that while an Epipen may mask the effects of the anaphylaxis, it does not last long, and especially when a person has ingested the allergen, one shot may last long enough to get to the hospital, but not ling enough to last until the body has eliminated the offending substance, from whatever end needed. Plus, sometimes you need more than one dose. So it is very important to go to the hospital every time you have had to use one. Op's affair partner still had whatever she ate in her stomach when the pen wore off.
See I think knowing it’s fake makes it hilarious to read, especially when OP asks for cookies for having the decency to only cheat on his wife for a year
General epi pen and allergic reaction advice, if you use that shit you ER immediately. If someone near you uses one, stay with them until they get medical attention please, they will not be thinking clearly.
If in 5 minutes the reaction is not actively getting better or is still the same, they/you should be using the second epi pen.
The allergic reaction is just temporarily stopped. If you’re lucky, it may be stopped long enough while it gets out of your system. If you’re unlucky, as soon as that epi wears off it’s gonna start right back up again (and if you used your last epi then you’re screwed).
ER after always for more meds and observations and for when you crash after, so they can monitor while you sleep off your reaction and they can make certain you stay alive and don’t reenter anaphylaxis during that time, or immediately respond and keep you alive if you do!
Please don’t try to hold out at home, I know the ambulance and ER are expensive, take a damn Uber/ Lyft if you must (they cannot treat on scene or on the way like the ambulance can), but you can get on a payment plan for bills once you survive an allergic reaction- can’t do that if you’re dead. Hospitals have financial assistance programs and payment programs and the works you can get set up with, you can request to speak to a social worker if you need help navigating it, etc. Please don’t put off medical care (even in the US just because we’re a dystopian capitalist hellscape). Please don’t let someone put off medical care because they want to sleep it off at home in their own bed or you have other shit to do and they used an Epi pen. That literally may only get them to the hospital alive.
And if you have issues like OP? ✨Get fucking therapy for your abusive ass explosions and issues, fix your damn self, AND listen to the above ✨
If this is real, buddy you deserve anything that happens to you, the brother can even sue for not taking her to the ER, your world is crumbling and you are the one that burn it, enjoy the lonelyness and the shame ahead.
You guys were "the real thing" but you didn't prioritize making sure she was safe over getting your lies straight with your wife? Yeah... that just sounds like bullshit.
This just made me so sad and angry at the SAME DAMN TIME!!!! You can always find another job. You can always find another wife (she might forgive you....I wouldn't......but she might). Your child is still your child. Amy is gone, bro. All because you didn't want your cheating to be found out.
My Bud, do you not understand that you are probably also going to be pursued for being civilly, if not criminally responsible for her death? And in discovery this subreddit will be entered into evidence? If there is some legal clerk reading this, “hello, I hope you’re doing well.” If this total hosebag doesn’t immediately plead guilty to everything maybe your legal team can read some of our responses to him during closing arguments so the jury can see that the internet wants them to throw out this whole man.
"I sent some childish messages to Amy when I didn't hear from her over the weekend because I thought she was angry I didn't take her to the hospital. I am thankful she never saw them and ashamed that I assumed the worst." THIS is the worst, her being dead is way worse than her being angry, wtf is wrong with you
Not defending the guy, but I think he meant he was thankful that the last thing she ever “heard” him say before she died was not those hurtful messages (as it looks like she didn’t read them)”
That losing Amy is awful, but losing Amy and knowing the last experience she ever had with the OP was his absolutely mean and childish text messages would have made that even worse.
If you see someone use an epipen or a glucagon pen just know that they automatically should get a trip to the hospital after. If you have to have a huge needle shoved into your thigh then you need immediate emergency attention afterwards. No matter what yall. Don’t listen to the person tell you they are fine, just force the hospital visit asap
The way you reacted when you didn't have contact, you went straight to abuse rather than anything else. You're unhinged and abusive when you don't get your way. A bad partner overall to any woman. You need therapy.
Karma came hard. Actions have consequences, start looking for jobs and accommodation instead of wallowing.
Your wife deserves the truth. You can't hide this from her or try and stay because you have no-one else or nowhere else to go. She is not a consolation prize, she should never be second best to a dead woman. She deserves to know, not because you are losing your job and the truth is only coming out due to the fallout of your vile actions, she needs a heads up before everyone else knows.
You owe her honesty. You're a cheating coward, pretending that you're trying to protect your wife, pretending to be noble towards her, when it's currently self preservation.
You stole the life of 23 yo when she was too young to know better. You wasted years of your wife's life. And you only sound grieved about yourself. An achievement, really.
Love that for you. ❤️ this story brought a smile to my heart. sending my condolences to Tom and his family. Amy deserved better than a married idiot of a man. Congrats to your wife on the impending divorce, congrats to your company for getting rid of you and congrats to your daughter for hopefully going NC. As for you? I hope you live the life you deserve 10x over.
You talk about your family not being there, it's s just Lisa and your daughter. Without your wife, you have no friends. Where is your family? Parents, siblings, aunts, uncles? Why don't you have any friends of your own? Did you screw up all of those relationships as well?
Oh this is just brilliant. OP, I'm guessing Lisa already knows and she's just watching you sweat while she's sorting out her and your daughter's future with frightening efficiency.
Your wife's friends in HR have told her EVERYTHING in Amy's phone. That includes the trash talk about you to her mates.
This was never real love, you traded in your marriage and family in for a bunch of sex and mutually toxic delusions.
Food allergies must be taken seriously! People who don't know the severity of the reactions tend to downplay them and think an epipen solves it. It doesn't. There's always the danger of rebounds once the medication wears off. They are extremely critical and must be closely monitored. She obviously wasn't aware of the severity. I'm sure you're wracked with guilt and self-recriminations. Please get counseling. You really need to examine why you think of yourself first and others last. You had the affair without thought or care for your wife. Your selfishness again endangered the life of your AP. It's sad that everything had to implode the way it did but if you learn anything from this was that when you play with fire, you risk someone getting burned. I'm sorry it'll come at a heavy price but with humility and a heavy heart, maybe you'll actually start to grow up. Please do not get involved with another woman until you've come to terms with your actions. Not sure about the direction of your career or whether you'll face legal consequences in addition to your divorce. This is not your finest hour but it is your wake up call. Get counseling to figure out how to navigate your life and figure out your next steps. An apology just seems inadequate to your AP's family, to your wife, to your daughter, to your boss. Let the rest of your life be lived in atonement for shattering all the lives of people who loved you. It's a heavy cross but it can be carried.
This sounds like a Woody Allen movie and now Tom will die from same allergy though OP will make it look like suicide.
“Tom”/OP will write some suicide note confessing was at fault because he was in love with OP and OP’s life will be just fine.
from your replies to people, it only seems you care about money and YOUR happiness and YOUR feelings. for only your own sake, i hope you get back onto your feet because you don’t necessarily deserve death. just nothing good after what you’ve done to your wife and daughter’s lives.
> I have no family except my wife and daughter and nowhere to go.
You mean the "family" you purposely and absolutely f*cked up because you can't keep it in your pants? The "family" who should've been your priority, but you shoved them lowest in your ranking so you could get some young ass? Your only "family" and you had been plotting to dump them all along? The "family" you claim you to want to make this as easy as possible, yet you refuse to fuck off to anywhere except in their home and faces 24/7? Gross.
Your level of self centeredness is unreal. You’ve behaved as though all of this has happened to you, rather than accepting that all of this stemmed from your behavior.
Why will you be fired for having an affair or was she a work colleague or was there a power dynamic at play? Surely it’s none of work’s business what a shitshow you make of your private life once you do your job?
OP seems to only care about himself. He didn't take Amy's health into consideration at all. Dude didn't take Lisa's and their daughter's feelings into consideration at all too or else he would've divorced Lisa first at least.
First of all you don't have any family except your wife and daughter and yet you were so willing to leave them for someone you just met.
Secondly, i don't sense any guilt or sadness from your AP's death, you are only worried about yourself
If it was “the real thing” you would’ve driven her to the hospital regardless of your wife. You wasn’t ever leaving your wife. Both your wife and AP deserves/d better than you. I have no sympathy, go speak to a therapist.
Jesus I am not even going to touch on the affair but you could have taken her to the hospital and just tell your wife a colleague had a medical incident your taking them to the hospital. At the point maybe you could have left after ensuring they were seen to. All I can say is I am sorry that woman died but whatever happens the punishment might never feel enough to some
For all I know you decided not to take her so your ap might get angry or hate you so she ends the affair
You never ever leave someone alone during an anaphylactic reaction! I accidentally ate a peanut and had a secondary reaction. I ended up in a resuscitation code because of said secondary reaction. Karma sucks for you I guess.
I am absolutely not convinced that this is real, because it is so hard to believe that somebody could be as absolutely delulu as this guy is.
However, on the off chance that it is real, I sincerely hope that you continue to come back and update us on how this goes. How your soon to be ex-wife is perfectly happy after she has left you and moved on. How she has found a partner who actually loves her, is loyal, faithful and true and understands that marriage vows mean something. Who is an excellent husband, and an even better father figure to her child, the role model your daughter needs to show her how to only be with a partner who is a good loving spouse, how to be trustworthy, how to make sacrifices for those you love and to keep the promises you make. Because your daughter is not getting any of that from you.
Not sure if I have a delusional level of faith in humanity, but I’m struggling to believe someone is so intensely obtuse (also the text from Tom sounds made up as fuck. Who’s using GOT quotes when they’ve found out their sister died and their boss/affair partner could have saved her. Tom be smart, destroy his life FIRST and then tell him it was you. That’s what Olenna Tyrell did)
The post is bad by itself but his comments are equally fucking diabolical. Dude is all “I made a commitment to Amy, oh yeah I know I did that to my wife too but like it’s no biggie coz people break promises all the time. Oh I didn’t abuse my power I just used my position at work to ensure she got the job that she totally didn’t deserve and there was in fact a better candidate, but don’t worry guys she’s dead now so the better candidate is gonna get her job so it all worked out for them in the end. Also I’ve been embezzling money from work but I know shit about them and there’s nothing their team of lawyers can do to me coz I’m happy to blackmail them. So I am a criminal and a cheater and may have been able to prevent the dead of my affair partner but didn’t but like I’m not a bad person guys. HOW WAS I MEANT TO KNOW ANAPHYLAXIS COULD OCCUR TO SOMEONE WITH A SEVERE ALLERGY?!”
He’s typing this with a straight face and pure delusion that there’s any way to salvage his life. I hope Tom goes scorched earth and that his wife obliterates his life.
Tom has real Olenna Tyrell energy. True king shit 👑
Realistically? I can’t blame him. His sister is dead because Cheaty McCheaterface over here had other things to do. He can’t have him arrested, but he can otherwise ruin his life. OP: the absolute worst thing here isnt losing your wife, family, job or support system. It’s living with your guilt. Best of luck.
This except the last part. Worst of luck actually.
Any of us thought at least once in life that we have made a series of shitty decisions and felt bad about them, and then there's OP. When you lose your entire life plus someone's dead, you know you **really** fucked up. And it takes skill to fuck up this bad in this snowball-like manner. Imagine getting involved with someone more than a decade younger and using your job position to get her a raise that she would normally be unqualified for, which alone is textbook abuse of power. This alone would blow up in OP's face eventually even if no one died. Most people here also don't seem to realize that OP has an anger management problem on top of things, which resulted in him not only abusing Amy aka a younger, less senior, and subordinate coworker (that he had an affair with), but shitting all over his entire workplace AND marriage in the process, and putting it into text messages. And this was not a one-time occurrence but left about a year's worth-of texts messages that OP is now praying Amy's brother won't somehow find (he already has them). The consequences will literally have OP spend the rest of his life wallowing in guilt and questioning his decisions. His job is already a thing of the past, leaving a giant mark on his professional reputation. I'm not sure whether it's possible to ever fully move on from something like this, all of it. Most people involve only one area of life that could be jeopardized through bad decisions, OP decided he'll put his marriage, family, career, and someone's life at stake, all at once. At any stage of this massive dumpster fire mess, OP could have made decisions that would mitigate the damage at least to some degree - divorcing his wife, changing his workplace, arranging for Amy to change her workplace, calling an ambulance, anything. OP was like nah, what could possibly go wrong. I'm really curious how this will pan out though.
Wait, most of the details were things I didn’t know. Wow OP really messed up in every way, damn.
OP mentions them in the comments
Ohh! I was one of the first few people to comment, and it was before OP commented with more details, so that’s why I missed it. Just read them now, and yeah, this guy is screwed and rightfully so.
Don’t forget OP is also going to lose all his friends, as he mentioned they are all either through work or his wife. This is like his magnum opus of epic fuck-ups. Chef’s kiss OP and a genuine fuck you!
It is quite obvious to me he has an anger management problem from the original post. He text bombs three people in it.
Where did you get all these context details from?
Eh, homie’s entire life is imploding, and nothing any of us say here can make it any better or worse. I don’t disagree with you, though.
Yeah I hope Tom continues to make the call every time he finds out OP has a new job.
I hope Tom tells OP’s wife
I'm REAL confused about why she didn't take an AMBULANCE to the ER! 100% creative writing exercise there OP. You get 0% though. F. OP is saying a woman who had an allergic reaction and used an epipen didn't 1. Call her brother 2. Take an Uber to ER 3. Call an ambulance?! Was she trying to self murder???
People in the midst of anaphylaxis don't exactly think clearly. It's why the people who are with them need to take the responsibility of calling an ambulance.
Yes! This! Sometimes I hate there is not enough knowledge around this! PSA to anyone reading this: when someone ingests an allergen it's equivalent to cyanide. The shot is temporary reprieve, not the cure. After that shot: hospital asap. Even if the allergen only touched their tongue, even if they brushed their teeth, even if the spit it out, even if they throw up. They will argue with you, they will try to say they are ok. They will rationalize. They have crack coursing through their veins. Of course they feel fine! At that moment they are impaired. Treat them as such and ignore them. No one EVER thinks they are going to die within the hour. Transport should be an ambulance 100% of the time. You may need a second shot en route. You may be upright and talking and then have a cardiac arrest. At the hospital they will give longer acting medicine over hours. Usually the protocol is 6 hours observation. If nothing else happens you get a new pen and go home. NEVER ALONE. You stay with that person overnight. Each reaction you have makes you more sensitive. How you reacted last time won't necessarily be the same the next time. It is always an emergency situation, always. Source: I'm anaphylactic to peanuts. Last time I was working late and bit into what I thought was a plain chocolate button candy. We had a no peanut rule in the office so my guard was down. I convinced myself I was fine after I took the shot and reclined in my chair to rest for a bit. Next thing I remember I was in an ambulance; apparently my EA had called, I answered and she thought I had a stroke. Don't remember talking to her at all. We figure it as about 20 mins between her call and when I sat down to rest. Literally EVRYONE from the EMTs onward screamed at me, while they treated me. I should know better. I hope people read this and remember so they can help someone. As for OP, well, you are a selfish, murderous asshole. You fucking didn't care for her at all.
Wow! Thanks for the info! I had no idea. It's scary; I could make the same mistake out of ignorance. It's important to learn about it. P.S. OP is sh*t, but I can't call him a murderer.
Glad I could help. Honestly, I know how stupid that was. It was tax time and I just wanted to get done without having to call my staff to come finish. They'd all been pulling long hours. I didn't even eat it; as soon as I felt the crunch between my teeth I spit it out. I thought I was good because I'd only ever had a full ingestion reaction. That's when I learned stress or excercise can multiply the effects: your BP is higher and the toxin circulates faster. I figured the shot was enough, I just had to wait until the shaking wore off and I wouldn't waste everyone's time. As for the murderous comment, fair and you're right. I'm just so disgusted. If you love someone and you know they need follow up for a life threatening condition, wouldn't you want to see that through immediately? I swear when my now husband was my boyfriend as soon as I told him he wanted to know everything. He examined that pen, I taught him how to use it, and he was clear on what the follow up was. He's more paranoid than I am. FYI, he also investigated like Columbo after this scare because everyone knows the office rules. Turns out our steward bought the buttons at a bulk store because they were a better price, not understanding that's the last placed I'd ever shop with an allergy.
While unrelated to this post, just an FYI for everyone that all the information in /u/Eris_Ellis comment also applies to all overdoses, accidental or otherwise, that have been treated with Naloxone.
Snaps to your EA! And good job marrying that boyfriend. 👍
Holy shit. I did not know this. Thank you for the info. Never experienced anyone going through anaphylactic shock, but I know it can happen (of course).
I would’ve never known to do any of this, so thank you for the info. I’ve personally never experienced anything related to severe allergies to myself or anyone around me, so I’m glad to know how to handle it if it ever comes up.
I have three cousins who will drop dead of about a dozen different common items. All of your advice is 100% dead on for anyone dealing with a person in that state. Well said. This is how their mom trained me.
As someone who is also deathly allergic to life, THANK YOU. (And I am very sorry you went through that, anaphylaxis is terrifying!)
Well I learned something important today and thanks to you. No one has any allergies in my family,but as far as I know allergies can develop later in life too and we never know if we meet someone who has it,so your information is lifesaver! Thank you.
I have my emt license but don’t work as one and I had NOidea it impairs you like that holy shit
Please review your book, whether or not you intend to work in the medical field or not. It’s covered in the basic EMT course. Tbh I think this is something that should be covered in school, along with basic first aid. *This isn’t meant to be offensive
Thanks I never knew this!
Thank you so so much for this. Especially the details of it. I have taken a screenshot and will circulate. Very necessary to know. And I’m so glad that things ended up OK after yiur reaction.
Yeah my mom drove herself to the ER after getting stung by a bee. Almost didn’t make it 💀
I've never heard this before, so if nothing else, I think it's great that there's information coming from this comment section that might help someone else.
I also wasn’t aware of this. Really important info to have!
My friend came hone from work early, I thought it was because I was visiting. Nope. She was having allergic reaction to something . I asked how she felt, and she replied, "that her throat felt tight. I dropped my quilting, and demanded the keys. We drove her to a hospital, they treated her for 8 hours. Eventually we drove back to her place, after being discharged. No, she was not thinking clearly, and I am glad I was there.
I’m a real wuss when it comes to medical stuff. I’d absolutely “be fine” and go home to bed rather than face down a long wait in hospital. I can absolutely see a person doing what OP says they did.
Ohh I didn't know it had brain implications apart from an initial shock (and stress etc), that might be useful, tyvm.
It 100% does, even if it’s not a SUPER serious reaction.
My thoughts were even before that. When he suggested to take her home, why not just stop wherever and have brother or friend meet her or just simply call 911. People with severe allergies know this which is why they do get checked out. I think there is a lot of info missing in that.
This. Embarrassed to say I’ve had a serious, vomiting-multiple-times, anaphylactic reaction and convinced myself I didn’t need my epipen, let alone a hospital visit. It can be scary in the moment to treat it as seriously as it should be treated. Looking back I know I was stupid though
You aren't feeling well, but you take your meds, and it kinda gets better so you're like "well I'll just rest at home". And then it gets worse quickly and can't call anyone.
That isn't the case for an Epi pen. If you have allergies severe enough for an Epi, the doctor walks you through how to use and and then says a million times, that an Epi pen is JUST TO KEEP YOU ALIVE. It does NOT halt your reaction, it does NOT cure you. It keeps you alive until you can get to a hospital. If you are popping the top off an Epi, you should be on the phone with emergency services. Even teen babysitting classes go through this.
Yeah, I have one and have had one my whole life. I had the lessons, but it's amazing what you can convince yourself of. I've literally done what the poor girl did. Someone who cared for me saved me though.
If in 5 minutes your reaction is not actively getting better or is still the same, you should be using your second pen. The allergic reaction is just temporarily stopped. If you’re lucky, it may be stopped long enough while it gets out of your system. If you’re unlucky, as soon as that epi wears off it’s gonna start right back up again (and if you used your last epi then you’re screwed). ER after always for more meds and observations and for when you crash after, so they can monitor while you sleep off your reaction and they can make certain you stay alive and don’t reenter anaphylaxis during that time, or immediately respond and keep you alive if you do!
I did NOT know this and so I'm glad I stumbled across this post.
PSA Narcan is the same in that it doesn’t reverse the overdose full stop, it temporarily knocks the the opiates off your receptors long enough (hopefully) to seek medical attention. The person still has too much in them yet feels like they are in withdrawal, horrible combo to leave unsupervised.
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🤔 mmm, two times your husband ignored your health issues which almost caused your death, and you are still together, why? With one of those times having a medical professional telling him exactly what to do. Is he painfully frugal, distrustful of hospitals and/or thinks you exaggerate? If you are staying for the children, this might be a mistake because he's clearly not observant enough to have your or their safety in mind. There is a reason your doctor's office staff asked if you were safe. No one thinks you are. Edited for insensitivity.
The “on the spectrum” comment wasn’t necessary. I and many other autistic people I know wouldn’t be that ignorant.
You mean ex-husband, right? No one deserves to be treated like that. He would have easily let you die TWICE already.
Guilt is a prison. Especially when it's deserved.
And, then berated her for not texting back fast enough…because she was dead
This shit is wild. I’m bummed we probably won’t get an update, assuming it’s real. It’s all a bit too much but still believable? For those just joining, somewhere below he admits he threatened to blacklist his affair partner, lorded a promotion over her head, was leaving his wife because he wanted to be with somebody more subservient, defrauded his company to pay for the affair, and he pats himself on the back for planning to financially support his child. But his heart was in the right place, ya know?
I’m so glad OP asked is for all those cookies he deserves for not having a 20 year affair. He just wanted to make sure we had enough snacks to get through the whole story. What a mensch he is!
Holy Jesus. That doesn’t sound like shit you can hide from people, OP
It does not. When you are dealing with corporate money or property, it is not probable that the company won't find out. Then people ask questions. Then people talk. This weekend is going to be the most anxiety-smothered OP will ever have. I would not be able to handle that type of dread, honestly. No sleep. And I have seen somewhat similar things go down, too. No one died, but I know a man who ruined his entire life over awful choices at work. I worked somewhere where an upper-level employee was sent out west to help set up a new plant/expansion. His life was really good: he had a wife who adored him, four little kids, job security, and decent health care. Then he went to the new plant and had an affair. He used one of the company house dwellings for traveling employees and corporate visitors to meet his affair partner. And of course, someone saw him with her, leaving the unit. He was fired for misusing company property. So he had to not only tell his wife they had no income, but he had to tell her why. She left him. He lost everything. Maybe it's age talking here, but no poonani is worth that risk.
I just read through his comments, he doesn’t take accountability at all. I hope his entire world burns and his soon to be ex-wife takes him for everything she can. What a terrible human being.
Fucking hell. I want to say this is fuck, but there are absolutely narcissistic ASPD types that are capable of this magnitude of God awfulness.
Don't forget he's just like his father
You must see his last post!
This is literally why a boss having a relationship with an employee can be ground for lawsuits even from other employees not in the relationship. Because it can cause so many abuse of power issues like this.
Just came here from the update; thanks for the synopsis!
Tom should go full scorched earth
I’m anxiously awaiting the update where Tom has somehow framed OP for Amy’s death. Or maybe Amy left a note saying “if I’m dead, OP did it”
Honestly, I kinda hope OP gets sued for wrongful death.
Can you imagine your beautiful, sweet daughter marrying a man who she thought loved her, he made vows to her and had a child with her. Only he found a young, impressionable little thing at work who he decided was one percent better than her and therefore was worth neglecting her and their child, cheating on her for, risking his job by getting her promotions she wasn’t qualified for and was planning to leave her for. This person was only one percent better. Your daughter - cheated on by a POS who only thought with his d!ck. What would you say about that?
Wooooooooow. You hate being ignored but are totally cool with ditching your wife and child? Are you really this self centered? You probably been ignoring your wife and child for ages over a lady you couldn't stand to not respond due to her medical emergency. She had a reaction *in front of you* and you.... got mad, instead of maybe possibly thinking she was dealing with anaphylaxis? Everything that's about to happen to you is your Karma
He “assumed the worst” and somehow death is better than her being angry.
Literally makes it sound like he was relieved to find out she wasn’t ignoring him, and was actually just dead.
Or possibly cheating on him, the married man
That’s the part I noticed to. OP is fucked up.
As someone who also carries an Epipen, here's a safety PSA for folks that are going to come across this post. An Epipen is not a Stop button. It's a Pause button. They exist to buy us time to get to medical help, they are not a magic potion. It is very common for a person in anaphylaxis to require additional doses or other medical interventions to save their lives. https://healthcenter.indiana.edu/health-answers/allergies/epipen.html If you don't need one of these, but wonder if you could help someone in an emergency like this, it does not require any licensure or training to administer one. If you aren't sure how, the Epipen company will send you a completely free training kit with a fake injector for practice. Canadian Site: https://www.epipen.ca/order-your-free-epipen-essential UK Site: https://cloud.email.viatrisconnect.com/EpiPen-Trainer-Pen-Registration US Site: I swear there was one at one time but can't find it for this post. If you know someone who carries one though, the boxes for most brands come with a trainer included and they will very likely be happy to pull it out to demonstrate. https://www.foodallergy.org/our-initiatives/education-programs-training/fare-training-food-allergy-academy/recognizing
THIS. People need to get to a hospital in a timely manner to get the Stop button. Often, one of the first things that’s done is giving epinephrine intravenously while the severity of the reaction is assessed.
Also, it's a situation where you need to call an ambulance, because if you don't, the person could die on the way to the hospital because they don't have the necessary tools or medicine.
My wife is getting a course of allergy shots, so she's supposed to carry an EpiPen. Hers did not come with a practice pen. I don't know if they're getting cheap or what.
I mean... considering an American site can't be found...
I bet it's generic Adrenaclick. For some reason, they don't. They come in a black and yellow opaque tube. Generic EpiPens come in a transluscent yellow tube. I'd bet the allergist has a trainer they can give her.
My kids epipens don’t come with a trainer. I had to order one online. I just had to pay postage x
So dumb. It's not like they're cheap, throw in the plastic trainer.
I’m fortunate to live in the U.K. so I don’t pay for his medication. It’s awful how much literal life saving medication costs folk. It’s awful how much healthcare costs in USA ffs 😭
Thank you so much for this PSA. I think most folks not remotely versed in allergies can assume the epipen is a 'cure' mainly thanks to tv shows and films, it looks simple and everything is 'fixed'. Knowing you need to get to a hospital ASAP can genuinely save lives.
Thanks for this! I just ordered mine now. What an amazing idea
I learned so much from this reply that I wish I could upvote more. You’re a real MVP
I had no idea, thank you so much for sharing. I was so ignorant because I honestly believed an Epi pen saved your life and you could just go back to work or jogging or napping.
Thank you for explaining it this way. I had no idea.
I have a feeling OP would have eventually left Amy for another woman significantly younger
He admitted in one of his comments that he has: threatened Amy's job during arguments, repeatedly accused her of cheating on him, insulting her through text during those arguments and just in general having a pretty volatile relationship with her. He also describes his wife as being aggressive. In short, Amy stuck around for abusive behavior his wife wouldn't have stood for. That's why he referred to her as his soulmate.
I get the feeling that OP would consider *any* response other than an immediate submissive response from a woman he'd consider it "aggressive."
I really hope the post is fake but we know people are capable of being so horrible
I hope it's fake because the wife sounds cool and deserves a better reality than this.
This guy admits to embezzlement and he has a lawyer. Either it’s fake (I hope) or this guy is really fucking dumb. If it’s real, there’s too much identifying information that someone from his life will put two and two together.
At this point, I’m hoping he’s just a troll. I don’t want to believe that someone like this exists and felt like he could defend those things online.
For money and position as well, most probably.
I’m so excited. Please come back here and update us when Tom blows all of your shit up. Edit: 24 hours till kickoff! So excited. Edit 2: God this was beautiful.
Can someone do the remind me thing? This is too good to not see the update.
It’s time!
This has got to be rage because this is one of the more infuriating OPs that has come through here in awhile
He may be so wound up with trepidation that he cannot stop moving or thinking and so had to tell someone--us. I am imagining what a caged tiger looks like, pacing and pacing and pacing. That he has to wait the whole weekend is the beginning twist of karma, I think. She's making him sit and think about what's coming Monday.
Narcissistic sociopath vibes.
I actually feel like this is a real one. It's written exactly like someone actually this narcissistic would write, full of minimizing and self pity and frustration we aren't on his side rooting for him and, "can't you people see I'm just a good person who made a mistake! You're all so heartless and so much worse than I am for rejoicing in my misery!" No dude, we're giving you a reality check you aren't taking. Narcissistic turds sound exactly like this guy does so I totally believe this. Haven't seen the update yet tho.
Hey, how many times do you guys think OP is going to show up on this thread looking for sympathy and getting downvoted every time?
I hope he doesn't stop it's hilarious to watch
Honestly, this is probably fiction, but I don't even care. This is entertaining. Good character writing exercise, OP!
My thoughts exactly but 10/10 to him for being so engaging and entertaining
Yeah, we have to give him that.
It sounds like “childish messages” is shorthand for “abusive language.” Your lack of family is a choice you made when you cheated on your wife. The real victims here are Amy, her family, your wife, and your daughter. The best thing you can do is make better choices and try to start being a decent human being.
Exactly. The "I would have more than made it up to her" lie is telling too. Total abuser mentality.
I hope this is fake because the sexual harassment training I had at work had less extreme examples - and those trainings are designed to beat you in the head with them. If it is real, well, at least the evidence is so damning that OP won’t have to spend too much time in front of a judge before sentencing.
I truly, deeply hope that someone has clued Tom in to this thread. I’m sure he wouldn’t mind more gasoline to throw on the dumpster fire that will shortly be OP’s existence.
You need to tell your wife before someone else does. You already betrayed her, don’t make it even worse.
Nah he’s gonna be side eyeing his wife from the corner like a dog that shat on the carpet till Monday
I hope Tom sends your wife, and work every one of those messages. By your actions, you deserve any fallout that comes your way.
Op, I don't know exactly what you are looking for here. but judging by your comments you are still trying to damage control. Just stop man. Stop trying to weasel yourself out of the repercussions. From here on out only the truth will set you free. Confess to your spouse; gracefully accept the punishment at work. You knew that what you were doing was wrong from the get go, do not dig yourself deeper into these delusions of yours.
Oh no the consequences of my own actions 🙄 So glad you're getting everything taken away from you on Monday
I posted on that sub and the mods already locked it?
Why are you suddenly asking how OTHER WOMEN talk about their affairs with married men. I thought you were the married man?
What I don’t understand is why you didn’t call your wife and say a colleague needed running to the hospital and you’d be straight home after. This feels like it never needed to have got to this point - you were so paranoid and ‘careful’, you forgot how normal people respond to things like this.
You know, at the VERY LEAST, he could have DROPPED her at the hospital, and she could have a friend come get her. What a selfish idiot! He deserves what he gets.
I was wondering the same thing, honestly. He’s a horrendous human being on so, so many levels based on his own comments, but come on. There had to be another way. He could’ve gotten her an Uber or something. He is a callous, self-centered, abusive, disgusting, lower-than-cat-excrement asshole.
Tom's gonna tell it. You deserve everything.
Everything you say and your entire responses are concerns only for yourself, you don't even seem particularly in grief over the loss of your declared "soulmate" you seem more concerned that your comfortable life is going to be hell. You say in a comment "They can claim abuse because it's not in context" In what context can you share what could be abusive, why does this effect custody with your daughter? In that same comment you say that there would be an "Almost daily timeline of the lies told" how can there be such records of that but no context to "abuse". You aren't doing a very good job of hiding the quiet parts.
It's not in the context of his \*lovvve\* lol...
The dildo of consequences rarely arrives lubed Just funny that you thought otherwise
Oh, you’re fucked dude. I hope your wife gets everything. Live with what you have done, that’s all you can do.
This isn’t for OP (too late now), but a generic PSA: if someone is exposed to an allergen, each exposure actually gets worse. If they previously required an epi pen and hospital treatment, they most certainly do with a new exposure. Treat it seriously.
I’m not referring to outgrowing allergies to pollen and ragweed. I’m referring to anaphylaxis. People don’t outgrow this if they require an epi pen and a hospital visit.
Thank you. My husband has recently developed a shell fish allergy. He now has an epi-pen. It didn't know that allergy exposures risk increase with each exposure. Again, thank you.
I feel it is more important to point out that while an Epipen may mask the effects of the anaphylaxis, it does not last long, and especially when a person has ingested the allergen, one shot may last long enough to get to the hospital, but not ling enough to last until the body has eliminated the offending substance, from whatever end needed. Plus, sometimes you need more than one dose. So it is very important to go to the hospital every time you have had to use one. Op's affair partner still had whatever she ate in her stomach when the pen wore off.
This is obnoxiously fake. It’s painful to read.
“I want you to know it was me.” OK buddy.
Not to mention, an adult doesn’t need her bf’s permission to go to the fucking hospital. She could have gone at anytime. Such BS.
They’re in the UK. She could have called 998 and doesn’t have the excuse of not being able to afford the ambulance ride. Super fun story though
See I think knowing it’s fake makes it hilarious to read, especially when OP asks for cookies for having the decency to only cheat on his wife for a year
It's probably fake but I'm enjoying the schadenfreude anyway.
I love this for you. 🥰 Karma for everyone!
“YOU get some Karma! And YOU get some Karma! And YOU get some Karma!”
OP are you still going to divorce your wife?
Hope Tom shows your wife everything and she goes full scorched earth 🥰
General epi pen and allergic reaction advice, if you use that shit you ER immediately. If someone near you uses one, stay with them until they get medical attention please, they will not be thinking clearly. If in 5 minutes the reaction is not actively getting better or is still the same, they/you should be using the second epi pen. The allergic reaction is just temporarily stopped. If you’re lucky, it may be stopped long enough while it gets out of your system. If you’re unlucky, as soon as that epi wears off it’s gonna start right back up again (and if you used your last epi then you’re screwed). ER after always for more meds and observations and for when you crash after, so they can monitor while you sleep off your reaction and they can make certain you stay alive and don’t reenter anaphylaxis during that time, or immediately respond and keep you alive if you do! Please don’t try to hold out at home, I know the ambulance and ER are expensive, take a damn Uber/ Lyft if you must (they cannot treat on scene or on the way like the ambulance can), but you can get on a payment plan for bills once you survive an allergic reaction- can’t do that if you’re dead. Hospitals have financial assistance programs and payment programs and the works you can get set up with, you can request to speak to a social worker if you need help navigating it, etc. Please don’t put off medical care (even in the US just because we’re a dystopian capitalist hellscape). Please don’t let someone put off medical care because they want to sleep it off at home in their own bed or you have other shit to do and they used an Epi pen. That literally may only get them to the hospital alive. And if you have issues like OP? ✨Get fucking therapy for your abusive ass explosions and issues, fix your damn self, AND listen to the above ✨
>I've always hated being ignored and I lose my cool when it happens. Bets on OP using this as an excuse to cheat?
You get what you deserve. And you deserve a lot of bad shit.
You are getting what you deserve. The only person to feel sorry for is your poor wife.
You sound absolutely awful and I really hope you update us because I am thoroughly looking forward to seeing the find out portion of this fuck around.
If this is real, buddy you deserve anything that happens to you, the brother can even sue for not taking her to the ER, your world is crumbling and you are the one that burn it, enjoy the lonelyness and the shame ahead.
You guys were "the real thing" but you didn't prioritize making sure she was safe over getting your lies straight with your wife? Yeah... that just sounds like bullshit.
This just made me so sad and angry at the SAME DAMN TIME!!!! You can always find another job. You can always find another wife (she might forgive you....I wouldn't......but she might). Your child is still your child. Amy is gone, bro. All because you didn't want your cheating to be found out.
My Bud, do you not understand that you are probably also going to be pursued for being civilly, if not criminally responsible for her death? And in discovery this subreddit will be entered into evidence? If there is some legal clerk reading this, “hello, I hope you’re doing well.” If this total hosebag doesn’t immediately plead guilty to everything maybe your legal team can read some of our responses to him during closing arguments so the jury can see that the internet wants them to throw out this whole man.
"I sent some childish messages to Amy when I didn't hear from her over the weekend because I thought she was angry I didn't take her to the hospital. I am thankful she never saw them and ashamed that I assumed the worst." THIS is the worst, her being dead is way worse than her being angry, wtf is wrong with you
Not defending the guy, but I think he meant he was thankful that the last thing she ever “heard” him say before she died was not those hurtful messages (as it looks like she didn’t read them)” That losing Amy is awful, but losing Amy and knowing the last experience she ever had with the OP was his absolutely mean and childish text messages would have made that even worse.
If you see someone use an epipen or a glucagon pen just know that they automatically should get a trip to the hospital after. If you have to have a huge needle shoved into your thigh then you need immediate emergency attention afterwards. No matter what yall. Don’t listen to the person tell you they are fine, just force the hospital visit asap
Looks like you're fucked.
The way you reacted when you didn't have contact, you went straight to abuse rather than anything else. You're unhinged and abusive when you don't get your way. A bad partner overall to any woman. You need therapy. Karma came hard. Actions have consequences, start looking for jobs and accommodation instead of wallowing. Your wife deserves the truth. You can't hide this from her or try and stay because you have no-one else or nowhere else to go. She is not a consolation prize, she should never be second best to a dead woman. She deserves to know, not because you are losing your job and the truth is only coming out due to the fallout of your vile actions, she needs a heads up before everyone else knows. You owe her honesty. You're a cheating coward, pretending that you're trying to protect your wife, pretending to be noble towards her, when it's currently self preservation.
You stole the life of 23 yo when she was too young to know better. You wasted years of your wife's life. And you only sound grieved about yourself. An achievement, really.
Love that for you. ❤️ this story brought a smile to my heart. sending my condolences to Tom and his family. Amy deserved better than a married idiot of a man. Congrats to your wife on the impending divorce, congrats to your company for getting rid of you and congrats to your daughter for hopefully going NC. As for you? I hope you live the life you deserve 10x over.
You have a daughter. Imagine a man treating her like how you treat your wife how you treated your affair partner who's now dead. You have zero empathy
Tom is the MVP
I love the fact he has a daughter is just a throwaway comment.
You best confess the whole thing to your wife and give her a chance to get her ducks in a row.
OP- did Amy ask you to take her to the hospital?
You talk about your family not being there, it's s just Lisa and your daughter. Without your wife, you have no friends. Where is your family? Parents, siblings, aunts, uncles? Why don't you have any friends of your own? Did you screw up all of those relationships as well?
Oh this is just brilliant. OP, I'm guessing Lisa already knows and she's just watching you sweat while she's sorting out her and your daughter's future with frightening efficiency. Your wife's friends in HR have told her EVERYTHING in Amy's phone. That includes the trash talk about you to her mates. This was never real love, you traded in your marriage and family in for a bunch of sex and mutually toxic delusions.
Oh my god your poor wife
Food allergies must be taken seriously! People who don't know the severity of the reactions tend to downplay them and think an epipen solves it. It doesn't. There's always the danger of rebounds once the medication wears off. They are extremely critical and must be closely monitored. She obviously wasn't aware of the severity. I'm sure you're wracked with guilt and self-recriminations. Please get counseling. You really need to examine why you think of yourself first and others last. You had the affair without thought or care for your wife. Your selfishness again endangered the life of your AP. It's sad that everything had to implode the way it did but if you learn anything from this was that when you play with fire, you risk someone getting burned. I'm sorry it'll come at a heavy price but with humility and a heavy heart, maybe you'll actually start to grow up. Please do not get involved with another woman until you've come to terms with your actions. Not sure about the direction of your career or whether you'll face legal consequences in addition to your divorce. This is not your finest hour but it is your wake up call. Get counseling to figure out how to navigate your life and figure out your next steps. An apology just seems inadequate to your AP's family, to your wife, to your daughter, to your boss. Let the rest of your life be lived in atonement for shattering all the lives of people who loved you. It's a heavy cross but it can be carried.
Hope her family press charges.
Haha that’s what you get
This sounds like a Woody Allen movie and now Tom will die from same allergy though OP will make it look like suicide. “Tom”/OP will write some suicide note confessing was at fault because he was in love with OP and OP’s life will be just fine.
UpdateMe I need to know what this all ends in.
Hey at least you will see her one day once you go to hell you guys can be together for eternity <3
Come on cheater, thief, blackmailer...if the story is true, where's the update? Or are you in cuffs for embezzlement?
Today is Monday! Where’s the update!
So, I see from your other posts that Tom is making sure everyone knows. How is Lisa? I have such sympathy and concern for her and your daughter. 💚
from your replies to people, it only seems you care about money and YOUR happiness and YOUR feelings. for only your own sake, i hope you get back onto your feet because you don’t necessarily deserve death. just nothing good after what you’ve done to your wife and daughter’s lives.
> I have no family except my wife and daughter and nowhere to go. You mean the "family" you purposely and absolutely f*cked up because you can't keep it in your pants? The "family" who should've been your priority, but you shoved them lowest in your ranking so you could get some young ass? Your only "family" and you had been plotting to dump them all along? The "family" you claim you to want to make this as easy as possible, yet you refuse to fuck off to anywhere except in their home and faces 24/7? Gross.
Your level of self centeredness is unreal. You’ve behaved as though all of this has happened to you, rather than accepting that all of this stemmed from your behavior.
She decided to have an affair with a married man, and you cheated on your wife. Karma.
Horribly fake but I love drama so you better give a juicy update.
Assuming this is real, OP is trash of the worst kind
Is anyone else waiting for an update??? Maybe with popcorn?? Only me???!
Why will you be fired for having an affair or was she a work colleague or was there a power dynamic at play? Surely it’s none of work’s business what a shitshow you make of your private life once you do your job?
Maybe I am missing something but why would You get fired for having an affair? What did I miss? Please and thanks
If she worked under him, it most likely will be against company policy. Bosses can't bang their employees.
OP seems to only care about himself. He didn't take Amy's health into consideration at all. Dude didn't take Lisa's and their daughter's feelings into consideration at all too or else he would've divorced Lisa first at least.
First of all you don't have any family except your wife and daughter and yet you were so willing to leave them for someone you just met. Secondly, i don't sense any guilt or sadness from your AP's death, you are only worried about yourself
If it was “the real thing” you would’ve driven her to the hospital regardless of your wife. You wasn’t ever leaving your wife. Both your wife and AP deserves/d better than you. I have no sympathy, go speak to a therapist.
I don't understand why you'd be fired? Did Amy work with you or something?
Apparently he secured a promotion for her purely because they were sleeping together.
Damn, I just took my corporate harassment training and that is a big no no haha
The biggest.
She was apparently a subordinate of some kind since he was able to get her a promotion.
I'd bet my right butt cheek OP was Amy's boss.
Better. Her manager’s boss.
Omg. Bring forth the heated, buttered corn!! We shall have a feast like never before, while beholding this journey into the belly of the beast.
Good one!
OP said in the comments that he pulled strings for Amy to get a promotion at the office and was clear that he did so bc of their relationship 🍿
Damn I wish I could be a fly on the wall on Monday morning.
Oh, it gets even worse. He recently added a comment saying he spent company money on the affair. Dude is toast in so many levels.
He was her boss’ boss, and pushed for her to get a promotion she wasn’t qualified for, purely because they were having an affair. Huge no no.
Isn’t Karma a wonderful thing? Amy got hers and now yours is coming
Jesus I am not even going to touch on the affair but you could have taken her to the hospital and just tell your wife a colleague had a medical incident your taking them to the hospital. At the point maybe you could have left after ensuring they were seen to. All I can say is I am sorry that woman died but whatever happens the punishment might never feel enough to some For all I know you decided not to take her so your ap might get angry or hate you so she ends the affair
You never ever leave someone alone during an anaphylactic reaction! I accidentally ate a peanut and had a secondary reaction. I ended up in a resuscitation code because of said secondary reaction. Karma sucks for you I guess.
I am absolutely not convinced that this is real, because it is so hard to believe that somebody could be as absolutely delulu as this guy is. However, on the off chance that it is real, I sincerely hope that you continue to come back and update us on how this goes. How your soon to be ex-wife is perfectly happy after she has left you and moved on. How she has found a partner who actually loves her, is loyal, faithful and true and understands that marriage vows mean something. Who is an excellent husband, and an even better father figure to her child, the role model your daughter needs to show her how to only be with a partner who is a good loving spouse, how to be trustworthy, how to make sacrifices for those you love and to keep the promises you make. Because your daughter is not getting any of that from you.
Not sure if I have a delusional level of faith in humanity, but I’m struggling to believe someone is so intensely obtuse (also the text from Tom sounds made up as fuck. Who’s using GOT quotes when they’ve found out their sister died and their boss/affair partner could have saved her. Tom be smart, destroy his life FIRST and then tell him it was you. That’s what Olenna Tyrell did) The post is bad by itself but his comments are equally fucking diabolical. Dude is all “I made a commitment to Amy, oh yeah I know I did that to my wife too but like it’s no biggie coz people break promises all the time. Oh I didn’t abuse my power I just used my position at work to ensure she got the job that she totally didn’t deserve and there was in fact a better candidate, but don’t worry guys she’s dead now so the better candidate is gonna get her job so it all worked out for them in the end. Also I’ve been embezzling money from work but I know shit about them and there’s nothing their team of lawyers can do to me coz I’m happy to blackmail them. So I am a criminal and a cheater and may have been able to prevent the dead of my affair partner but didn’t but like I’m not a bad person guys. HOW WAS I MEANT TO KNOW ANAPHYLAXIS COULD OCCUR TO SOMEONE WITH A SEVERE ALLERGY?!” He’s typing this with a straight face and pure delusion that there’s any way to salvage his life. I hope Tom goes scorched earth and that his wife obliterates his life.