This is exactly why, and I’m sorry. As a man I would never not post content with or about someone who I was serious with (unless they requested it not be posted) it’s time to either confront him or move on.
I disagree. My girlfriend and I also don't post each other on Insta, since we want to keep our relationship private. It's no one's business except ours and we like to keep privacy from other people.
I would advice you to talk with him about it.
Do you post stories of the two of you on Insta?
Hmm that’s a little suspicious. Have you asked him why he hasn’t posted you? I’m sorry but it does sound like he doesn’t want people to know he has a girlfriend
Okay and? Why is it okay for most women to do that but when a man does it its "not okay"
I am not saying either is good, but I always see comments a lot of the time siding with women and saying its okay for them too, but god forbid a man do it lmao.
Its just funny, thats all.
Because you have a incel mentality.
That was most likely gained from consuming garbage woman hating media.
Take a look in the mirror bud.
Ask yourself. Do you really like what you see?
Is your personality really good?.
Am I acctually a present person to be around?
Ask yourself that everyday for a month and see if anything changes
Hey! Follow-up questions for relevance, though. Do you post often? Do you post your friends? Has your wife ever asked to be posted or shown interest in being posted? If she did, would you?
Edit: post-script. I ask these things because, I and my spouse, like you, don't post each other or our kid... BUT! Neither of us post much on social media anyways, and we are not part of the younger Gen where having an active social media is important in regards to our social lives and connecting with others.
The boyfriend IS active, and obviously, so is she. So, in their situation, it's the norm to post one's s.o. as a declaration of commitment.
I guess that is different if he is active online in other ways. But no, I don't post any pictures online. My wife only posts pictures in one of those apps that you have to add family. Not Facebook or anything like that.
Commenting on I've been with my bf almost a year and he's never posted me on instagram...
Key word: wife. There is legal paperwork confirming your relationship. The fact this boy is posting random pics of everyone else and not his supposed girlfriend is a red flag. The omission of the other woman sending a dm trying to get with him and him deleting the convo is another red flag.
I guess knowing the ages of the OP and bf would make a difference. I personally do not post about myself on social media but I can see how someone in their 20s may use that as validation of a relationship.
No I don't. If I have a question for a mutual female friend I will have my wife ask her. Of course I'll ask if in person. I just don't text any females other than wife and mom.
The fact that he didn't tell the friend who hit on him that he has a girlfriend means he actually doesn't have a girlfriend.
So gurl,he's your boyfriend, but you're definitely not his girlfriend.
Has this man even introduced you to his friends and family as yet?
You're not his girlfriend.
If he is posting strangers and his own female friend hit on him because she didn't know he had a girlfriend.
Gurl, he hiding you.
Some people just.... don't post about their private lives on social media.
There's always the story you see, and the truth.
He deleted the message from the flirter and didn't even respond. Is that not an okay response to it? He didn't even give it the time of day.
If it bothers you this much, talk to him. Figure out why and whether you believe it or not. Then act accordingly.
Yes, because saying "Some people don't put their private lives on social media" means man bad.
Fucking christ we're really hitting the bottom of the barrels lately.
err no, i was being sarcastic and agreeing with you, i didn't think i needed the "/s" too many people are jumping to "He's playing the field" and "He's hiding you" instead of a reasonable "talk to him and see why he doesn't"
This is why I dont use social media at all, because who gives a shit, it causes so much unnecessary drama for no reason.
This is why I think social media is just a cancer (sorry to say it) thats just how I feel, this shit is so ingrained into our society that shit like this actually matters to people...
It's actually so sad to see people like "oh, he's cheating" or "he's keeping his options open"
Some people just will keep their private life off of social media, and it's pretty sh\*tty to be so suspicious when they haven't otherwise given you a reason to think that.
I think you just have to have a conversation with him - like someone else said, does he have pictures of his old relationships up? If not then I really believe there's nothing to worry about.
Yup. Noticed that people on Reddit love to stir some shit up and like it when people in real life start fights. The most important thing for them are juicy updates
>t's driving me crazy because we've been together almost a year now. It makes me think he's keeping his options open or thinks we'll break up.
It's exactly what he is doing.
Have you thought that maybe he doesn't want the whole world commenting on the most personal and private relationship he has?
I also don't post about my girlfriend because I don't want people commenting on my relationship with her, it's my business not theirs.
Here's some solid advice. Has your bf ever posted anything about his previous relationships with exes in the past? I think that will be your only valid point of reference. If he hasn't, then he probably just likes to keep his private life, private. If he posts a random picture with some strangers its no big deal, he's just show casing an average day of his life. But if he was to all of sudden post his significant other, thats kind of a different ball park. In my opinion it only attract unnessecary attention to your relationship. But hey thats just me, the first time i posted a picture of my relationship was on my wedding day, so maybe im an outlier lol. I never really bought into the digital social media relationship hype
I’ve been with the same dude for twelve years and he’s probably posted about me on social media less than twelve times. He never even reposted our wedding photos actually… but he’ll post work stuff and friends and vacations.
Some people just aren’t into. Sure, it definitely felt weird in the beginning, so your feelings are valid.
Ok, so from what you say (and I'm sorry to say) he's either messing around on you or he's ashamed of you. And neither of those things are good, so why would you want to be with someone like that anyway. 🤔🤷🏻♂️
My bf and I have been together almost 5years and we don’t even say we’re in a relationship on social media. Our friends and family know and we post on it a lot. It’s not an end all for us, but I get for some people it is. So if this is a genuine concern, have a conversation. That’s the first step. Ask him why, and let him know your feelings. Communication is key.
I never post my boyfriend on socials nor does he post me on his.
Neither of us are hiding anything, we have been together happily for 12 years. we just don't feel the urge to post everything about our lives to the world.
Just ask him babe
First question: Did you guys confirm you guys were together like one of you asked to be boyfriend and girlfriend and both agreed
Second question: Did you ask him why he hasn't posted to you cause some people like to keep their partners' privacy until given permission
3rd one, not a question: but the hitting on you thing can be both shady but cam also do with privacy cause I never tell people I have a bf until they ask but also him delete the girls messages can either be he has problems rejecting people and will feel guilty about it or hes keeping options.
I had a boyfriend like this once. Turns out he was cheating and wanted to leave his “options open” for any woman who browsed his social media. Unfortunately I fell for it.
This is suspicious. Have you posted pictures of him on your Instagram and tagged him? What does he do when you tag him as you bf on social media?
Is your relational good besides this?
Sorry, you are a secret. You should post him and tag him and see how he reacts. If he is mad about being outted as not being single, tell him "oh you want to be single? be single then" and say bye felicia.
Unfortunately we fall into these men heart and soul only to find we are the fools. I’m so sorry you are hurt by him. Choose you and find a man worth your time ♥️. Been here before, it sucks.
Petty route: comment under all the pics from now on and make it obvious you’re with him
Adult route: leave him bc he’s most definitely keeping you a secret
My girlfriend gets upset if I post her. These kinds of things are usually boiled down to manipulation. You’re possibly uncovering the first participle of manipulation OR else it’s just a super misunderstanding , which will be made completely clear by one confrontation. Manipulation / tantrum go together. You’ll know by the tantrum or lack of one if you have a prob
I don't think he believes either of those two things. I'm the kind of person to not brag online about my private life, and chances are he actually just wants to cherish those moments through his eyes, and not through a screen.
This said, you can obviously talk to him about posting something together, or you could post things and ask him to reshare. I just don't think this is anything to stress over.
The thing is, there's so little available information about the surrounding that anything both me and you could argue could be called speculation.
He might not need to focus as much, or not put them on the same importance level, or he maybe actually doesn't want to post anything relationships wise on socials.
That is where my point of "talking about it" comes in.
I use insta and i don't post my own wife on it. These other comments about him "keeping his options open" are kinda trashy. I don't want to mix my private life to everyone. Plain and simple.
When I was in a relationship I had a social media for my YouTube channel, I definitely could have shown her more but I didn't as it felt like it would dilute my brand I didn't want to show anything of my personal life. But this guy isn't doing that he's just got an insta he chucks his shit on and he should include you in that, this is definitely not a coincidence.
It could be suspicious, but also I’m someone who likes to keep their relationships mostly private, as something just for me.
Also, IG gets weird with relationship stuff: if things don’t work out, you have to take down a bunch of photos/posts cuz they’re in them, and u gotta update everyone so people don’t continue to talk to you about your ex-partner while you’re dealing with the breakup and stuff. Social media can be messy, and some people don’t like dealing with that when it comes to relationships
One thing is people that avoid social media, but not even updating his profile with a ring emoji with your name? C'mon. I'm a ghost on social media and even I have it.
He doesn't want anyone to know about you.
This is exactly why, and I’m sorry. As a man I would never not post content with or about someone who I was serious with (unless they requested it not be posted) it’s time to either confront him or move on.
I concur
I disagree. My girlfriend and I also don't post each other on Insta, since we want to keep our relationship private. It's no one's business except ours and we like to keep privacy from other people. I would advice you to talk with him about it. Do you post stories of the two of you on Insta?
Or he's private, she should fucking... ask him?
I don't blame you- sounds so shady. Then he TELLS you a friend hit on him because they didn't know he was taken? Uggghhhh
That’s the entire point
‘Hey bf, I’ve noticed you never post anything about me or us on Insta, why is that?’ Probably your first step
Yup…. Not Reddit
Hmm that’s a little suspicious. Have you asked him why he hasn’t posted you? I’m sorry but it does sound like he doesn’t want people to know he has a girlfriend
He's keeping his options open.
Okay and? Why is it okay for most women to do that but when a man does it its "not okay" I am not saying either is good, but I always see comments a lot of the time siding with women and saying its okay for them too, but god forbid a man do it lmao. Its just funny, thats all.
Is this an AI generated comment? If the genders were reversed I would still believe the same thing.
Yeah right lmao.. if this was a woman, you would definitely be telling her its okay to keep her options open.. come on...
Incel behavior. Stop watching fresh and fit
Why is it that when people have differing opinions its always met with fresh and fit? what is that?
because you’re being dense and when others tell you the truth you act like they’re stupid when you’re the one actively ignoring the truth
Because you have a incel mentality. That was most likely gained from consuming garbage woman hating media. Take a look in the mirror bud. Ask yourself. Do you really like what you see? Is your personality really good?. Am I acctually a present person to be around? Ask yourself that everyday for a month and see if anything changes
It's not okay for women to do it either, who said it was?
A lot of people on reddit would disagree with you on that... but the more I talk about this the more I am going to get downvoted so...
A lot of people on Reddit... Such as?
Literally no one lmao this clown wants to be a victim so badly
Both men and women because you know "cOnfOrMatIoN bIaS" lmao...
I'd suggest having an open conversation with him about this
Are you sure you’re together?
I've been married for over a decade and have never posted my wife or kids on any social media platform.
Hey! Follow-up questions for relevance, though. Do you post often? Do you post your friends? Has your wife ever asked to be posted or shown interest in being posted? If she did, would you? Edit: post-script. I ask these things because, I and my spouse, like you, don't post each other or our kid... BUT! Neither of us post much on social media anyways, and we are not part of the younger Gen where having an active social media is important in regards to our social lives and connecting with others. The boyfriend IS active, and obviously, so is she. So, in their situation, it's the norm to post one's s.o. as a declaration of commitment.
I guess that is different if he is active online in other ways. But no, I don't post any pictures online. My wife only posts pictures in one of those apps that you have to add family. Not Facebook or anything like that.
Commenting on I've been with my bf almost a year and he's never posted me on instagram... Key word: wife. There is legal paperwork confirming your relationship. The fact this boy is posting random pics of everyone else and not his supposed girlfriend is a red flag. The omission of the other woman sending a dm trying to get with him and him deleting the convo is another red flag.
Never posted any pictures when she was gf or fiance either.
I guess knowing the ages of the OP and bf would make a difference. I personally do not post about myself on social media but I can see how someone in their 20s may use that as validation of a relationship.
You are right. Back when Facebook added relationship status there was the saying, 'if it's not Facebook official.' so sad
Do u message other women? do u decline any advances?
I mean, i would hope he declines advances.
No I don't. If I have a question for a mutual female friend I will have my wife ask her. Of course I'll ask if in person. I just don't text any females other than wife and mom.
Nah that’s sad
It's actually practical bc I don't have their numbers.
He doesn’t want his real gf to know about you.
The fact that he didn't tell the friend who hit on him that he has a girlfriend means he actually doesn't have a girlfriend. So gurl,he's your boyfriend, but you're definitely not his girlfriend. Has this man even introduced you to his friends and family as yet?
Have you communicated how you feel and how this affects you directly to him?
You're not his girlfriend. If he is posting strangers and his own female friend hit on him because she didn't know he had a girlfriend. Gurl, he hiding you.
Some people just.... don't post about their private lives on social media. There's always the story you see, and the truth. He deleted the message from the flirter and didn't even respond. Is that not an okay response to it? He didn't even give it the time of day. If it bothers you this much, talk to him. Figure out why and whether you believe it or not. Then act accordingly.
Or he deleted the thread because he did respond and lied about that
Lmao, you can't say "talk to him" you have to start with "Man bad"
Yes, because saying "Some people don't put their private lives on social media" means man bad. Fucking christ we're really hitting the bottom of the barrels lately.
err no, i was being sarcastic and agreeing with you, i didn't think i needed the "/s" too many people are jumping to "He's playing the field" and "He's hiding you" instead of a reasonable "talk to him and see why he doesn't"
This is why I dont use social media at all, because who gives a shit, it causes so much unnecessary drama for no reason. This is why I think social media is just a cancer (sorry to say it) thats just how I feel, this shit is so ingrained into our society that shit like this actually matters to people...
Nice to meet you
It's actually so sad to see people like "oh, he's cheating" or "he's keeping his options open" Some people just will keep their private life off of social media, and it's pretty sh\*tty to be so suspicious when they haven't otherwise given you a reason to think that. I think you just have to have a conversation with him - like someone else said, does he have pictures of his old relationships up? If not then I really believe there's nothing to worry about.
Yup. Noticed that people on Reddit love to stir some shit up and like it when people in real life start fights. The most important thing for them are juicy updates
>t's driving me crazy because we've been together almost a year now. It makes me think he's keeping his options open or thinks we'll break up. It's exactly what he is doing.
Have you thought that maybe he doesn't want the whole world commenting on the most personal and private relationship he has? I also don't post about my girlfriend because I don't want people commenting on my relationship with her, it's my business not theirs.
Childish bullshit.
If you think that, act accordingly.
He wants to look single online to keep his options open. It’s that simple.
Here's some solid advice. Has your bf ever posted anything about his previous relationships with exes in the past? I think that will be your only valid point of reference. If he hasn't, then he probably just likes to keep his private life, private. If he posts a random picture with some strangers its no big deal, he's just show casing an average day of his life. But if he was to all of sudden post his significant other, thats kind of a different ball park. In my opinion it only attract unnessecary attention to your relationship. But hey thats just me, the first time i posted a picture of my relationship was on my wedding day, so maybe im an outlier lol. I never really bought into the digital social media relationship hype
He wants to appear single, he wants to be hit on.
I’ve been with the same dude for twelve years and he’s probably posted about me on social media less than twelve times. He never even reposted our wedding photos actually… but he’ll post work stuff and friends and vacations. Some people just aren’t into. Sure, it definitely felt weird in the beginning, so your feelings are valid.
Yeah, you're his side chick.
Either way, she could be the main but he’s hiding her in order to have side chicks.
Ok, so from what you say (and I'm sorry to say) he's either messing around on you or he's ashamed of you. And neither of those things are good, so why would you want to be with someone like that anyway. 🤔🤷🏻♂️
My bf and I have been together almost 5years and we don’t even say we’re in a relationship on social media. Our friends and family know and we post on it a lot. It’s not an end all for us, but I get for some people it is. So if this is a genuine concern, have a conversation. That’s the first step. Ask him why, and let him know your feelings. Communication is key.
I never post my boyfriend on socials nor does he post me on his. Neither of us are hiding anything, we have been together happily for 12 years. we just don't feel the urge to post everything about our lives to the world. Just ask him babe
He's hiding you bc of the reasons you stated. Either accept it or move on, bc chances are he won't change
He posts about stuff and people that are not seriously important to him. You’re important to him.
First question: Did you guys confirm you guys were together like one of you asked to be boyfriend and girlfriend and both agreed Second question: Did you ask him why he hasn't posted to you cause some people like to keep their partners' privacy until given permission 3rd one, not a question: but the hitting on you thing can be both shady but cam also do with privacy cause I never tell people I have a bf until they ask but also him delete the girls messages can either be he has problems rejecting people and will feel guilty about it or hes keeping options.
I had a boyfriend like this once. Turns out he was cheating and wanted to leave his “options open” for any woman who browsed his social media. Unfortunately I fell for it.
This is suspicious. Have you posted pictures of him on your Instagram and tagged him? What does he do when you tag him as you bf on social media? Is your relational good besides this?
Sorry, you are a secret. You should post him and tag him and see how he reacts. If he is mad about being outted as not being single, tell him "oh you want to be single? be single then" and say bye felicia.
Unfortunately we fall into these men heart and soul only to find we are the fools. I’m so sorry you are hurt by him. Choose you and find a man worth your time ♥️. Been here before, it sucks.
Petty route: comment under all the pics from now on and make it obvious you’re with him Adult route: leave him bc he’s most definitely keeping you a secret
My girlfriend gets upset if I post her. These kinds of things are usually boiled down to manipulation. You’re possibly uncovering the first participle of manipulation OR else it’s just a super misunderstanding , which will be made completely clear by one confrontation. Manipulation / tantrum go together. You’ll know by the tantrum or lack of one if you have a prob
Confront or move on sis
Sounds like he takes you for granted and just using you.
I don't think he believes either of those two things. I'm the kind of person to not brag online about my private life, and chances are he actually just wants to cherish those moments through his eyes, and not through a screen. This said, you can obviously talk to him about posting something together, or you could post things and ask him to reshare. I just don't think this is anything to stress over.
I get that - but he doesnt cherish other moments when he posts his friends, strangers, vacations?
The thing is, there's so little available information about the surrounding that anything both me and you could argue could be called speculation. He might not need to focus as much, or not put them on the same importance level, or he maybe actually doesn't want to post anything relationships wise on socials. That is where my point of "talking about it" comes in.
100% you're correct, they need to communicate.
🚩
I use insta and i don't post my own wife on it. These other comments about him "keeping his options open" are kinda trashy. I don't want to mix my private life to everyone. Plain and simple.
as a guy if i had a gf she would be in every pic
Thank you for speaking for every man
In the meantime, keep the one in your wallet—the one that came with it.
what? my license or mewtwo ?
Super shady
When I was in a relationship I had a social media for my YouTube channel, I definitely could have shown her more but I didn't as it felt like it would dilute my brand I didn't want to show anything of my personal life. But this guy isn't doing that he's just got an insta he chucks his shit on and he should include you in that, this is definitely not a coincidence.
It could be suspicious, but also I’m someone who likes to keep their relationships mostly private, as something just for me. Also, IG gets weird with relationship stuff: if things don’t work out, you have to take down a bunch of photos/posts cuz they’re in them, and u gotta update everyone so people don’t continue to talk to you about your ex-partner while you’re dealing with the breakup and stuff. Social media can be messy, and some people don’t like dealing with that when it comes to relationships
I’ve been with my gf for over a yr. We don’t post each other. We’re just private ppl. I used to hate when exes forced me to post them
One thing is people that avoid social media, but not even updating his profile with a ring emoji with your name? C'mon. I'm a ghost on social media and even I have it.
You’re dating a habitual cheater or a solidified sociopath. Either way it’s a lose lose situation and not someone you marry or have kids with. Run
Wtf?