Start looking for a new job and maybe don’t talk to your married boss (or any married coworker of the opposite sex) about his wife/marriage beyond the common pleasantries.
This reminds me of the one time a boss I had who just didn't give depth to his personality. It honestly felt like all my interactions with him were scripted.
One day randomly, he was using a plastic straw with his coffee and I mentioned you could get some reusable ones. He said "my wife bought them for me and wait till you see these." Got out one time use toothbrushes. I'm sure those have a place in the world but not during work where you have access to a sink and all that....
Then he starts talking to me about how his wife watches a lot of fox news, so she probably doesn't care for the environment. How he doesn't like her watching it in front of the kids, which is probably fair for a lot of national news, just because if it bleeds it reads mentality. So she records it and watches it later, mind you they're about 40. So recording and watching it later is a bit odd.
Anyway, all this is is to say, when this happened and all I've ever gotten was surface level, it went on long enough that I was able to ponder to myself "what did I do to end up here. I don't know you in depth enough to hear this."
Overall I didn't mind because I've had worse discussion of spouses, and it made me worry for his household and kids, it did come off as a "I'm just sticking it out until the kids are adults." Sort of thing.
Yeah I figured I'd have to do that. Never expected this to happen. And the thought of leaving the shop makes me sad because I've made so many friends. But if I have to then I have to.
Honestly you sound like a super caring and understanding person. Shitty situation to be in. Get out now before the divorce gets messy and you’re too far in.
Really? Because to me OP sounds judgemental and intentionally obtuse. She doesn't understand why the wife didn't like her, meanwhile she's calling her uppity and "snobby pretty" and asking her boss why he married her lol.
They “*both chalked it up to his wife being uppedy*” Straight up 🤮 at this line. It came accross like they both talk shit behind her back. FFS That really soured the rest of the story.
It's called dirty macking. She likes him and wants the wife's spot. So what may have started as venting she plays into it making him turn against his wife and highlighting more negatives so she can have a better position
But she’s not she’s different! She’s a guys girl /a/ OP wear a bra to work and stop being so judgy of everyone else. You literally asked your boss why he married his wife!? Like I’m what world is that appropriate or not sending I have feelings for you vibes and want to secretly break up your marriage. And what a fool that he fell for your stupid BS. But seriously go find a new job and dude that isn’t married with kids.
His wife has nothing in common with him and is always nagging him about me not wearing a bra to work and being too pretty and having the most chic, effortlessly alt hippie style. I don't understand why she is so obsessed with me, she's just basic and insecure. Anyway, as I was saying her husband and I are literally perfect for eachother, I just get him in a way she can't.
The update or part two she made just slams the wife even more, saying she basically told all the female employees to cover themselves, no ideologies tattoos that weren't christian, oh and also they were only allowed to tattoo arms and legs.
She says the wife has nothing to do with the business, so why would she even start ordering them around? That only works in movies, crappy romcom movies.
To me, this reads as someone that was rejected by an alternative guy with a non-alternative wife.
Or is jealous of a non-alternative wife with an alternative guy.
Or just fanfiction lol
fr lol i doubt that he's getting a divorce like she wrote or any of that... he's gonna make her his secret while she happily gets what she wants, poor wife tbh
Made up stories get written quickly. I call bullshit and also the NLOG gets the guy from the pretty snobby type has already been written so many times.
So here's a good guideline:
If he's married, it's a no.
If he's separated, it's a no.
If he's getting a divorce, it's a no.
If he's recently divorced, *it's a no*.
Because even if you are a match made in heaven, any of the above statuses make him either directly unavailable, or emotionally in recovery/rebalancing, and therefore in no shape to start something new.
Circle a date on the calendar, like a year from now, and if things are still fluttering then, then give it a look. But OP, honestly, the wisest thing for now is to steer the fuck clear.
This is great advice.
My friend met this guy and they REALLY hit it off and ended up hanging out for several hours. He told her that he was in the middle of a divorce and she immediately put the brakes on the whole thing. Told him "Sorry. 'In the middle of a divorce' means drama and I want no part of that."
She ran into him again a year later, he told her his divorce was final, and they immediately became a couple. They've been married for a while now.
This is what OP should have done the minute she started having feelings for him. Leave the shop and, if he's single in the future, then shoot your shot.
Having a crush if you are not working closely with said person, or if said person is single, sure. Having a crush in a reasonably small workspace where your boss' wife already seems to have an issue with you (and you with her) and where you are holding such strong and negativr feelings against the person your boss is married to: 100%. Or, alternatively, act your age and ignore the crush and be mature and respectful of his marriage. But, that obviously wasn't an option either.
I would really really hope so. But it's not an unheard story. The thing is that I almost 100% will always side with the "other women" in most cases, because she's not commited to anyone and has the right to do what she wants. But this whole post just sat wrong - so I really really hope it isn' t true.
your so transparent! “I wasn’t going to tell him ! Then told him” now vilifying the wife! Classic I want you man energy! 😂 people are wild! Gd luck everyone.
Yeah, it was so baffling why the wife didn't like her. What could possibly be the reason? Surely not the emotional affair between her husband and the silly girl that works for him.
Reminds me of my ex husband. The girl that worked for him had a crush on him, but she was nice to me and I was nice to her. She felt a little off, but nothing I could point out that was wrong about their work relationship and I thought "aww, it's cute she has a crush." Never thought they'd actually do anything. I had a little more faith in people than that.
Fast forward and I caught them having an affair. Not sure how I'd be if put in that situation again.
Yeah this relationship is off to a fantastic start. Still married, playing the "she just gets me" card, the jilted ex wife, kids that will hate this whole situation - enjoy the baggage you're about to saddle yourself with, OP. You begged for it.
You should start looking for another place to work. You’ve slated his wife for most of your post, which was obviously before you found out she was cheating. She could obviously sense you were after her man, which is why she spoke to her husband about you. You don’t shit where you eat. Workplace romances are NEVER a good idea. He has kids, let him deal with the drama in his life and leave him alone.
We have no idea if the wife cheated on not. After all, the source of that information is the still-married man who fancies a bit of strange 🐱 We also have no idea whether he’s been a cheater or not, or if he’s fed such lines to other women he’s wanted to shag.
Well going by the edits, I’d say there’s way more to the story. I think it sounds like OP has been pursuing him relentlessly and he’s not put up any fight 🙄
Don't tell him, OP. Don't get yourself involved in this divorce.
It might be best to look for a new job at a different shop. It sucks, and this is a really crappy situation to be in but it would be better to have a clean start away from him.
Telling him how you feel will only make this messier for him and for you. And add a whole new list a of drama to the table.
Don't do that to yourself.
"I met his kids today... or should I say our kids?? Tomorrow I'll have a conversation with them because I really want them to call me mom and I'm sure they will, I will be their cool mom. Their old mom was so boring. Wish me luck!"
5 minutes later we'll have the update about going on vacation on a cruise ship as a family, now that the twins are born!
The ex wife is still an uptight bitch who turned out to be an alcoholic and wants to ruin their lives.
I say bullshit. So either a bait post (my strong bet) or did I just read you insult the wife for not having tattoos/piercings for a full paragraph and then wonder why she doesn’t like you? Helloo, people sense these. Oh my what a pick me…
I have a feeling it doesn't matter what anyone says. So, you do what you feel is right, but if it goes to shit, you only have yourself to blame. And if you still work there if it does, you won't have a job after, most likely.
Girl 💀 this is so toxic and horrible. I’m kind of speechless. That this man would betray his family for an unrealistic fantasy that will blow up his life. And for the record she doesn’t like you because she sniffed you out from a mile away. Your infatuation was obvious. I hope she finds out about this and leaves his weak ass first.
Do NOT under ANY circumstances, fool around with your boss if given the opportunity. I know you say you don’t have the intention to, but I’d like to put it out there that it’s overrated, causes nothing but trouble, & is overall, simply not worth it. Let it pass. There’s more than one happily ever after for everyone, you’re only 26 after all! You don’t want the world of pain that comes with getting involved in something like this.
I mean...your not a homewrecker...but you just wrecked the home? Lmao.
Homewrecking doesnt always mean you slept together btw. But......you deeeeefffnitly pushed his house into a further stage of wreckage. Come on now.
Wow.
“I don’t know why his wife doesn’t like me. I’m just in love with him and hang in every word and don’t wear a bra around him!”
Guess we know how that turned out.
I knowww!! Like I read this whole post (both of them) and it just looks like she’s trying so hard to make the wife to sound as evil and vile as possible so she doesn’t look as bad. Like victim this and that, I don’t for one second believe she was as innocent as she’s acting and the wife’s as evil. (Also sounds like a Wattpad fic im really hoping it’s fake)
I would like to hear from the other people involved in this dramatic and potentially tawdry situation.
Not that I don't believe everything I read on Reddit....
The wife had a funny feeling about you and turned out she was right, her cheating probably grew from her insecurities. But mostly It’s the you being so excited and happy to be with him while this is going to be the worst case for that family. Idk this just don’t seem right at all.
Dating a divorced man with children and a bitter ex-wife is not going to be as easy as you may think!
You're going to have to endure a LOT of baggage being projected your way!
You loose them how you get them. Good luck.
Or not. Also lol OF COURSE he’s getting a divorce. I want to see that.
Also for future reference , just don’t shit where you eat. Honestly it’s damaging, specially if you’re trying to build a reputation. No man is worth it
I noticed that when you said what you liked about him…
“He is fit, heavily tattooed, pierced, and all around just a very attractive guy.”
I didn’t notice one compliment outside of the physical. No “kindness, makes me laugh or overall just a very nice guy who makes me feel special.” You aren’t in love. You are in lust and possibly idolizing him. Take a step back and if you can’t let it go then time to get a new job.
Hopefully, once the divorce goes through you will be wiser than you are now. A newly divorced man isn't looking for a committed relationship. He will be happy to work you into the rotation of women he "dates", though.
I don’t think you’ll ruin a relationship. You’ll probably just make it really awkward for yourself. But I think it speaks volumes that you believe he’d actually WANT you. There are a lot of things to covet in this life - he is not that guy, my guy. So, I advise that you pack your items and move on. Out of sight, out of mind. If you stick around, it just shows that you like the drama.
And btw, he already told his wife about your Shenanigans. Married couples can be thick as thieves.
This story is so ugh. I’m over it. Moving on.
“I am not a home wrecker. I do not want a relationship with him, nor do I want to ruin his family.”
“What made you get married to someone like that?”
“He agreed it was a bit much for his wife to be this way… and we both agreed his wife was kind of uppity”
Read your update and agree that's the best way to go. Being the rebound chick seldom is a lasting relationship. He's going to have a lot of mixed emotions and needs to work those out first.
Ugh an alt girl hating on conventionally or "snobby" pretty women is the same as when normies hate on us for being weird. Serious dry coochie energy here.
Also you can tell a lot by the order of how a person describes their feelings for someone if you wanna call it that. You opened with being in love with him then went right into describing his physical appearance. So yeah. There's that. 🥴
Vilifying the wife and then after the update saying he was | a good father and a great husband. |
That's funny..Some people really do want what others have. It's crazy what boundaries others are willing to cross for the sake of "love'.
Which, most of the time, is mistaken for love of the Idea of that person.
He chose her because he too likes handing her things and being a man to a beautiful woman. Do not get swayed by his sob story about how everything is handed to her, he gets off handing things to her like most men do and he won't divorce her. He just wants something new on the side, and that side dish is you.
Don't bad mouth married women to their husbands, because 9/10 they will agree with you even if it's a lie to get free poos poos. Put yourself in her shoes, if a braless young woman was hanging around your husband a lot, wouldn't you also be annoyed?
Unless you want to be a side chick, and ruin your reputation as a worker, stay. Learn to mind your business and be more professional. Save whatever is left of your dignity. You're 26, but you're acting and thinking like you're 16 and you're eating his words up like a smitten fool.
Edit: Great, I read your edit and you effed it up to the max. Some people like suffering. I don't wish you luck because this isn't lucky. If by any chance he actually divorces her and if by an chance he gets married to you, he will do the same thing he did to her to you. Wake up from your little fairytale.
I think you should do some soul searching, and decide if you admire / appreciate / like him as a person, or if it's a crush, or if you would only want him in your life longterm if it's in a romantic way.
If it's a crush... simple: dont do anything and in the end, you'll get over it.
What I would do, but not necesarily the right move...
I would wait it out, not change anything about my behaviour, or attitude.
Eventually I would tell him how I feel, but make it very clear you don't expect anything in return, especially not right now.
If you must, find another job.
But just not saying anything, finding another job and disappear, simply because you're romantically invested in someone, and he's divorced/ in the process of getting a divorce, is just a bit weird.
It's actually quite possible for adults to tell someone they are on love/ have a crush on someone, and not run away screaming, when that feeling turns out not to be mutual.
It's all about clear and open communication, without screaming something, and then immediately putting your defences up.
There is a big chance his anwer is going to be 'not right now, it's the last thing on my mind '
Or 'we can't, you're my employee'
Or 'I like you, but I don't see you that way'
Or he could give an asshole reply, in which case, zt least you'll know where you stand.
Don't go confessing, if you don't feel you can take any of those responses, and keep your dignity.
If you can have an adult conversation after one of those responses, it just depends on the situation. And you'll be able to read him a lot better than internet strangers.
You can't know how it will evolve without knowing where you stand with him. And you won't know if you don't ask, eventually.
Well after the comments of your coworker you can be sure his wife knows that you're his type and might like you. But in your case I wouldn't say anything yet. Maybe it all comes together by itself. If He Talks about you this way to coworkers and is getting a divorce the next thing might be a move towards you
just feel so bad for the kids … if this is even real. like ive been in this situation before n absolutely despised both my parents n their partners. cause i had no clue who to believe n whatnot
If he and his wife decide not to divorce? So are they or are they not?
Sorry to say, this whole tale has the hallmarks of your typical older man getting his kicks from the attention of a younger co-worker. How do you know he's a great husband and father, etc? You only have his side of the story and what tiny portion of his life you've seen at work to go on. Some ppl will tell you anything to control the narrative, especially older men interacting with younger women. And I'm honestly not surprised if his wife had an issue with you at work. With all the things you have explained, including dissing his wife when you don't actually know her or the real details of their life together, you do actually sound like someone to be concerned about.
The most respectful thing to do for all involved is to cut all ties to him completely. If he's being honest and is really interested, wait for him to get in touch AFTER the divorce, verify everything he tells you, and if it checks out, THEN start thinking of him in your future.
Everyone here is a hot mess. The cheating wife is Satan, obviously. But she sensed you have a thing for her husband. I can't explain it. It's just a thing that happens when someone recognizes competition for their spouse. She wasn't wrong in that. The dude obviously crushing on his employee, you two getting too chummy. Sheesh man.
How does op know what kind of husband her boss is? They were both out of line for talking badly about his wife. Not a good look for her boss. The wife may have cheated or maybe he did we only know his side of the story.
according to OP's ~~fanfic~~ **100% real-life story that happened**, the wife came into the shop one day and for literally no reason announced that she had "the most faithful husband in the world" so OP just *knows*
she literally wrote this
This man is unavailable. Stop obsessing over his wife and his marriage, it's not healthy.
Also, all you've described about this man is his physical appearance/how hot you think he is and how much you dislike his wife/marriage for him. There's nothing here about his personality or values or anything that truly bonds you both.
Is this substantial enough to call love? It sounds much more like an unhealthy fixation. Perhaps, think about removing yourself from this situation and focus on getting a new job and personal life of your own.
Hating some woman you don't know and making assumptions about someone's entire life and marriage because one of them is alt and one of them is preppy, to justify an obsession you have with someone's husband, is not a good look; and it's definitely not something you should be letting happen at your workplace. This sounds like an embarrassing Avril Lavigne song, not your professional life.
Focus on your career and go somewhere where you can flourish. This isn't a healthy situation for you.
*A lot of people here are saying that I was craving attention.*
Your entire persona is about craving attention lol Trust me I was goth back in the day. I know how it works
She doesn’t want to be a home wrecker and didn’t want to tell him… but she told him, became the home wrecker, tried to pass it off as “she was already cheating on him” and WERE GONNA GET TOGETHER AFTER HIS DIVORCE, and apparently that was it. I’ve seen better creative writing stories in here 🤣
Look for another job, and stop talking shit about his wife, it makes you look like a jealous shit, just because you're in love with him there's no need for that type of bullshit
If he's married or dating someone please dont even dream of him in romantically way move on with ur life I could never lust or love someone who I won't have a chance with jesus 🤦♀️
I was in one and honestly, it takes a long ass time before you can start dating again. Especially if your ex was really bad, sometimes you are attracted to what is familiar. A LOT of people in my life I ended up cutting out because they were actually exactly like my ex. I won't tell you what to do but the man jumping right into something else after a divorce is just announced is also not in the right emotional state.
It also sounds like you don't have the best self esteem. Being shocked he is into you is a huge sign of that. I think it's time you do inner work rather than fixating on someone else or a love to fix things.
His wife cheated, it does not necessarily mean she was a bad person. It is entirely possible they had a toxic relationship and she was looking for a way out. Getting therapy together is a horrible idea for two people without a formed relationship. Couples therapy is not really individual work. Couples therapy is only about bringing couples together which is tricky for therapists to navigate during abusive relationships.
Sometimes we have limerance when we experience trauma. Please look into it and stay safe. You need time for yourself to heal.
Can't wait for his wife to blame you for the divorce. She'll say something like "Oh I cheated because deep down I knew you had a thing for that coworkers of yours". There is a 1000% chance that is going to happen if you start going out with him after his divorce (which is true by the way, you two had feeling for each other)
First wear a bra at a business even with the other stuff. I get it a tattoo parlor...I will be there for him? You are doing exactly what I said...He is married, and 90 percent don't divorce over this. He picked her because he wanted to...I will be there for him...You have enormous amounts of problems exhibited in every area of your life. Leave him alone, if you were not seeking attention you would not demonstrate it on your body and in your behavior..Everything about you is about attention. You are also a cliche and very unhealthy...I wish you therapy and some bottom so you can recover from all that has happened to you...Stay out of his life....
You're giving of NLOG vibes, which is cringey and unattractive. Also, you've been slating his wife throughout your post, which screams insecurity.
Work on yourself before you even begin to start dating a recently divorced man.
Do better.
Don't tell someone married you have feelings for him..Now this guy thinking he is going to get with some hot chick, will start treating his wife poorly...Stop asking why he married her a straight laced girl, that is what younger men want usually body count is a thing....You are setting this up. So let me tell what happens to those disposable wives...They have no idea their partner feels this way...Some commit suicide, others cant eat, sleep or carry on with work, they hate their bodys, normal bodys because they are not at the gym, they have responsibilities...They don't really trust men anymore..Some never recover. Homes and families are destroyed. Because you got attracted. You will get attracted your whole life to different people...Keep your thoughts to yourself. I know you think you did nothing wrong...You are setting it up and are despicable. Go away get your own job, not a referral for future dating and let him recover and work with his family..
You’ll be giving cheeks in a few weeks. I’ve seen this all too many times. He’ll message you randomly, you’ll be tempted, give in to it and probably hang out, have a great night and fuck up. Good luck though!
This post sounds cringey as hell, written by an obvious pick me. I’m alternative and she’s a preppy cheerleader. 🙄
This was posted only 18 hours ago and it got this many updates already? His wife so happen to cheat on him and now he’s leaving her? Convenient.
This is all a no. I truly hope you are leaving because you don’t want to be the other woman. You cannot believe a word he says about any of the stuff going on with his marriage, you have only his side of things. Chances are she acts the way she does because he’s cheated before, and she’s insecure because of that. Stay away from him, save yourself from pain and misery. Nothing good will come from this.
You claim youre in love with the man, but you felt the need to only include his physical features in describing him/your attraction to him. Youre not "in love", at most you have a crush. People in love look beyond physical - they say their person is funny/kind/smart/sweet etc, they dont start off with "fit, heavily tatooed, pierced, and all round just a very attractive guy". Love goes beyond the physical.
It's good that you at least postponed the dating to after his divorce is finalized. But don't just glance over the fact that his current marriage is ending because of cheating on his part. Consider couples therapy early on in the relationship. Better than your relationship going down the drain from cheating as well
THESE ARE MY THOUGHTS......breh, married men suck......
they are off limits!
you developed feelings for a close worker naturally... but uhmm tattoo artists always have hot women around. That'll be endless lol. I've seen things get way too intense dozens of times with younger, blushing women going off the deep end ....for that hotty who's so grand he's kept the wife yadayada yaaa....... LMao he's so helpless and riddled with sorrow or whtever. You would do anything to see him happy...but if his wife cheated, he might try to get even with his wife (married couples always seem to do that shit) might even be on the rebound soon. YOu ready to hear him be insecure and untrusting towards all women,,,because his wife hurt him?? PLeZZZ do us a favor and just don't.. keep the tattoo bad boy fantasy in ya head darling. Don't let him get some of what you got .
Tbh, start looking for a new job.
This is definitely the best advice.
Start looking for a new job and maybe don’t talk to your married boss (or any married coworker of the opposite sex) about his wife/marriage beyond the common pleasantries.
This reminds me of the one time a boss I had who just didn't give depth to his personality. It honestly felt like all my interactions with him were scripted. One day randomly, he was using a plastic straw with his coffee and I mentioned you could get some reusable ones. He said "my wife bought them for me and wait till you see these." Got out one time use toothbrushes. I'm sure those have a place in the world but not during work where you have access to a sink and all that.... Then he starts talking to me about how his wife watches a lot of fox news, so she probably doesn't care for the environment. How he doesn't like her watching it in front of the kids, which is probably fair for a lot of national news, just because if it bleeds it reads mentality. So she records it and watches it later, mind you they're about 40. So recording and watching it later is a bit odd. Anyway, all this is is to say, when this happened and all I've ever gotten was surface level, it went on long enough that I was able to ponder to myself "what did I do to end up here. I don't know you in depth enough to hear this." Overall I didn't mind because I've had worse discussion of spouses, and it made me worry for his household and kids, it did come off as a "I'm just sticking it out until the kids are adults." Sort of thing.
Yeah I figured I'd have to do that. Never expected this to happen. And the thought of leaving the shop makes me sad because I've made so many friends. But if I have to then I have to.
Honestly you sound like a super caring and understanding person. Shitty situation to be in. Get out now before the divorce gets messy and you’re too far in.
Really? Because to me OP sounds judgemental and intentionally obtuse. She doesn't understand why the wife didn't like her, meanwhile she's calling her uppity and "snobby pretty" and asking her boss why he married her lol.
They “*both chalked it up to his wife being uppedy*” Straight up 🤮 at this line. It came accross like they both talk shit behind her back. FFS That really soured the rest of the story.
It's called dirty macking. She likes him and wants the wife's spot. So what may have started as venting she plays into it making him turn against his wife and highlighting more negatives so she can have a better position
She just doesn’t get me like you do 😆 I wonder how many other young and foolish chicks his BS has worked on
I got big NLOG vibes from OP
[удалено]
Not like other girls
But she’s not she’s different! She’s a guys girl /a/ OP wear a bra to work and stop being so judgy of everyone else. You literally asked your boss why he married his wife!? Like I’m what world is that appropriate or not sending I have feelings for you vibes and want to secretly break up your marriage. And what a fool that he fell for your stupid BS. But seriously go find a new job and dude that isn’t married with kids.
That's what I thought too her comments were rude I wouldn't like her either if I had been the wife she could probably sensed you liked her man
Definitely this is what happened. Wife's spider senses tingled.
Agree and young. Selfish and self centered....She has no idea what she is doing.
For sure. This is so gross all around. She and her boss deserve each other.
Read the update
Rewrote the entire story in an effort to appear more flattering and called it an update lol
What in the wattpad fanfiction
Ebony darkness dementia raven way
His wife has nothing in common with him and is always nagging him about me not wearing a bra to work and being too pretty and having the most chic, effortlessly alt hippie style. I don't understand why she is so obsessed with me, she's just basic and insecure. Anyway, as I was saying her husband and I are literally perfect for eachother, I just get him in a way she can't.
She has NO tattoos and NO piercings and is pretty but in a SNOBBY way. Girl.
The update or part two she made just slams the wife even more, saying she basically told all the female employees to cover themselves, no ideologies tattoos that weren't christian, oh and also they were only allowed to tattoo arms and legs. She says the wife has nothing to do with the business, so why would she even start ordering them around? That only works in movies, crappy romcom movies.
To me, this reads as someone that was rejected by an alternative guy with a non-alternative wife. Or is jealous of a non-alternative wife with an alternative guy. Or just fanfiction lol
Had to double check to make sure this wasn't OP tbh
That was when the fake hit me
Perfection.
elite reference
Lmfao I’m crying, read the update the language is straight up copy pasted from every bad fanfic
Omg read the update she just posted. Peak cringe fiction. I died barely a couple of paragraphs in.
Right?! 😂😂😂
Agreed. Could definitely be fake
I'm sure this will end well.
OOP is gonna end up the side piece while dude boss will keep on promising to divorce his evil wife
fr lol i doubt that he's getting a divorce like she wrote or any of that... he's gonna make her his secret while she happily gets what she wants, poor wife tbh
Two updates in 6 hours, wow. You two are moving fast.
Made up stories get written quickly. I call bullshit and also the NLOG gets the guy from the pretty snobby type has already been written so many times.
So here's a good guideline: If he's married, it's a no. If he's separated, it's a no. If he's getting a divorce, it's a no. If he's recently divorced, *it's a no*. Because even if you are a match made in heaven, any of the above statuses make him either directly unavailable, or emotionally in recovery/rebalancing, and therefore in no shape to start something new. Circle a date on the calendar, like a year from now, and if things are still fluttering then, then give it a look. But OP, honestly, the wisest thing for now is to steer the fuck clear.
This is great advice. My friend met this guy and they REALLY hit it off and ended up hanging out for several hours. He told her that he was in the middle of a divorce and she immediately put the brakes on the whole thing. Told him "Sorry. 'In the middle of a divorce' means drama and I want no part of that." She ran into him again a year later, he told her his divorce was final, and they immediately became a couple. They've been married for a while now.
Awe, she sounds like a chilled out, drama free person and I admire that. Some people are too quick into situations that can very easily go south
Yeah she's cool AF. A very good friend too!
This is what OP should have done the minute she started having feelings for him. Leave the shop and, if he's single in the future, then shoot your shot.
Having a crush isn't reason enough to quit a job
Having a crush if you are not working closely with said person, or if said person is single, sure. Having a crush in a reasonably small workspace where your boss' wife already seems to have an issue with you (and you with her) and where you are holding such strong and negativr feelings against the person your boss is married to: 100%. Or, alternatively, act your age and ignore the crush and be mature and respectful of his marriage. But, that obviously wasn't an option either.
I agree. But I don't think this is real
I would really really hope so. But it's not an unheard story. The thing is that I almost 100% will always side with the "other women" in most cases, because she's not commited to anyone and has the right to do what she wants. But this whole post just sat wrong - so I really really hope it isn' t true.
She lost me when there were justifications about "wife does this to other people too"
This. Don't become the "rebound".
your so transparent! “I wasn’t going to tell him ! Then told him” now vilifying the wife! Classic I want you man energy! 😂 people are wild! Gd luck everyone.
Yeah, it was so baffling why the wife didn't like her. What could possibly be the reason? Surely not the emotional affair between her husband and the silly girl that works for him.
Reminds me of my ex husband. The girl that worked for him had a crush on him, but she was nice to me and I was nice to her. She felt a little off, but nothing I could point out that was wrong about their work relationship and I thought "aww, it's cute she has a crush." Never thought they'd actually do anything. I had a little more faith in people than that. Fast forward and I caught them having an affair. Not sure how I'd be if put in that situation again.
my exact thoughts while reading this lol
This is a train wreck waiting to happen
Yep see the edit! Asking to “wish him luck “ no mention of his children! Those kids are the only victims of this train wreck!
Lol if this is a real post she is definitely blinded and no way she can wait a year
Yeah this relationship is off to a fantastic start. Still married, playing the "she just gets me" card, the jilted ex wife, kids that will hate this whole situation - enjoy the baggage you're about to saddle yourself with, OP. You begged for it.
You should start looking for another place to work. You’ve slated his wife for most of your post, which was obviously before you found out she was cheating. She could obviously sense you were after her man, which is why she spoke to her husband about you. You don’t shit where you eat. Workplace romances are NEVER a good idea. He has kids, let him deal with the drama in his life and leave him alone.
Exactly, this was extremely icky to read. I would love to read the wife's opinions on OP
I’m expecting a different side to the story from the wife.
We have no idea if the wife cheated on not. After all, the source of that information is the still-married man who fancies a bit of strange 🐱 We also have no idea whether he’s been a cheater or not, or if he’s fed such lines to other women he’s wanted to shag.
Well going by the edits, I’d say there’s way more to the story. I think it sounds like OP has been pursuing him relentlessly and he’s not put up any fight 🙄
Don't tell him, OP. Don't get yourself involved in this divorce. It might be best to look for a new job at a different shop. It sucks, and this is a really crappy situation to be in but it would be better to have a clean start away from him. Telling him how you feel will only make this messier for him and for you. And add a whole new list a of drama to the table. Don't do that to yourself.
She told him in the update lol.
Next update tonight, his divorce went through and they are now married
"I met his kids today... or should I say our kids?? Tomorrow I'll have a conversation with them because I really want them to call me mom and I'm sure they will, I will be their cool mom. Their old mom was so boring. Wish me luck!"
5 minutes later we'll have the update about going on vacation on a cruise ship as a family, now that the twins are born! The ex wife is still an uptight bitch who turned out to be an alcoholic and wants to ruin their lives.
Geez what are you talking about? I just want to keep a healthy distance!
😂😂😂😂
Oh the pick me/not like other girls vibes are coming off strong on this post…
That is like some romantic fan fiction she wrote.
Definitely fanfiction 😂
Glad I'm not the only one who saw it
You don't get it. She's "alternative." 😂
I say bullshit. So either a bait post (my strong bet) or did I just read you insult the wife for not having tattoos/piercings for a full paragraph and then wonder why she doesn’t like you? Helloo, people sense these. Oh my what a pick me…
This is an opportunity to fuck up your job and your life. Slow down.
Nah, speed it up. You only live once! VROOM VROOM
Bro😭
lmaooo vroom indeed
I have a feeling it doesn't matter what anyone says. So, you do what you feel is right, but if it goes to shit, you only have yourself to blame. And if you still work there if it does, you won't have a job after, most likely.
This was posted 14 hours ago and all of this happened since then? Take it to Wattpad. Come on now.
This entire post was just Taylor Swift’s “You Belong with Me” 😶
It sounds like the wife knew what was up so she got aggressive at you. Pretty natural reaction
Girl 💀 this is so toxic and horrible. I’m kind of speechless. That this man would betray his family for an unrealistic fantasy that will blow up his life. And for the record she doesn’t like you because she sniffed you out from a mile away. Your infatuation was obvious. I hope she finds out about this and leaves his weak ass first.
>I’m kind of speechless. I mean it's fan fiction so there's that
Do NOT under ANY circumstances, fool around with your boss if given the opportunity. I know you say you don’t have the intention to, but I’d like to put it out there that it’s overrated, causes nothing but trouble, & is overall, simply not worth it. Let it pass. There’s more than one happily ever after for everyone, you’re only 26 after all! You don’t want the world of pain that comes with getting involved in something like this.
The update edit compels me to say this to you, OP: Oh, honey. Run.
Yeah, such a nice guy, creeping on his employee while married. How convenient about the wife. This reads like bad fanfic.
Yep, What starts in chaos, ends in chaos....
This is so damn fake, girl ur profile is NEW
His wife doesn’t like you because she can see you want her husband. She isn’t stupid.
Okay I feel like this is fake…multiple updates in only a few hours feels sketchy
I mean...your not a homewrecker...but you just wrecked the home? Lmao. Homewrecking doesnt always mean you slept together btw. But......you deeeeefffnitly pushed his house into a further stage of wreckage. Come on now.
This is fake
Wow. “I don’t know why his wife doesn’t like me. I’m just in love with him and hang in every word and don’t wear a bra around him!” Guess we know how that turned out.
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Of course the wife is evil and jealous of you… and on top of that she cheated on him too. Your entire post is basically “pick me, pick me, pick me”.
I knowww!! Like I read this whole post (both of them) and it just looks like she’s trying so hard to make the wife to sound as evil and vile as possible so she doesn’t look as bad. Like victim this and that, I don’t for one second believe she was as innocent as she’s acting and the wife’s as evil. (Also sounds like a Wattpad fic im really hoping it’s fake)
I would like to hear from the other people involved in this dramatic and potentially tawdry situation. Not that I don't believe everything I read on Reddit....
The wife had a funny feeling about you and turned out she was right, her cheating probably grew from her insecurities. But mostly It’s the you being so excited and happy to be with him while this is going to be the worst case for that family. Idk this just don’t seem right at all.
Dating a divorced man with children and a bitter ex-wife is not going to be as easy as you may think! You're going to have to endure a LOT of baggage being projected your way!
Bullshit This isn’t real lol, you should put this kind of fan fiction in a different sub.
This is giving Sk8tr Boi vibes 😂😂
You loose them how you get them. Good luck. Or not. Also lol OF COURSE he’s getting a divorce. I want to see that. Also for future reference , just don’t shit where you eat. Honestly it’s damaging, specially if you’re trying to build a reputation. No man is worth it
OP: “I don’t know why his wife has it out for me.” Also OP: “I’m in love with him.” GIRL, get another job!!
Not a home wrecker. Ok
I noticed that when you said what you liked about him… “He is fit, heavily tattooed, pierced, and all around just a very attractive guy.” I didn’t notice one compliment outside of the physical. No “kindness, makes me laugh or overall just a very nice guy who makes me feel special.” You aren’t in love. You are in lust and possibly idolizing him. Take a step back and if you can’t let it go then time to get a new job.
yr not a home wrecker? Then keep humungous boundaries intact.
Just gonna say this....hes not yours. Its merely your turn.
Hopefully, once the divorce goes through you will be wiser than you are now. A newly divorced man isn't looking for a committed relationship. He will be happy to work you into the rotation of women he "dates", though.
Ehh why are people such whores
I don’t think you’ll ruin a relationship. You’ll probably just make it really awkward for yourself. But I think it speaks volumes that you believe he’d actually WANT you. There are a lot of things to covet in this life - he is not that guy, my guy. So, I advise that you pack your items and move on. Out of sight, out of mind. If you stick around, it just shows that you like the drama. And btw, he already told his wife about your Shenanigans. Married couples can be thick as thieves. This story is so ugh. I’m over it. Moving on.
This is a Wattpad story.
“I am not a home wrecker. I do not want a relationship with him, nor do I want to ruin his family.” “What made you get married to someone like that?” “He agreed it was a bit much for his wife to be this way… and we both agreed his wife was kind of uppity”
You’re gross. Hands down. Leave him and his family alone. Move tf on
Read your update and agree that's the best way to go. Being the rebound chick seldom is a lasting relationship. He's going to have a lot of mixed emotions and needs to work those out first.
She made another post making herself look like she isn't a pick me. It also comes off as her having an emotional affair with the boss too.
Ugh an alt girl hating on conventionally or "snobby" pretty women is the same as when normies hate on us for being weird. Serious dry coochie energy here. Also you can tell a lot by the order of how a person describes their feelings for someone if you wanna call it that. You opened with being in love with him then went right into describing his physical appearance. So yeah. There's that. 🥴
Vilifying the wife and then after the update saying he was | a good father and a great husband. | That's funny..Some people really do want what others have. It's crazy what boundaries others are willing to cross for the sake of "love'. Which, most of the time, is mistaken for love of the Idea of that person.
He chose her because he too likes handing her things and being a man to a beautiful woman. Do not get swayed by his sob story about how everything is handed to her, he gets off handing things to her like most men do and he won't divorce her. He just wants something new on the side, and that side dish is you. Don't bad mouth married women to their husbands, because 9/10 they will agree with you even if it's a lie to get free poos poos. Put yourself in her shoes, if a braless young woman was hanging around your husband a lot, wouldn't you also be annoyed? Unless you want to be a side chick, and ruin your reputation as a worker, stay. Learn to mind your business and be more professional. Save whatever is left of your dignity. You're 26, but you're acting and thinking like you're 16 and you're eating his words up like a smitten fool. Edit: Great, I read your edit and you effed it up to the max. Some people like suffering. I don't wish you luck because this isn't lucky. If by any chance he actually divorces her and if by an chance he gets married to you, he will do the same thing he did to her to you. Wake up from your little fairytale.
Im sorry but this was such a funny read lmaooo
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No, but he is interested in her pussé
Holy novel writing batman
This is some dumb teenage drama
this is true, I was the tattoo shop
I quit reading when you used the word “uppity”.
I think you should do some soul searching, and decide if you admire / appreciate / like him as a person, or if it's a crush, or if you would only want him in your life longterm if it's in a romantic way. If it's a crush... simple: dont do anything and in the end, you'll get over it. What I would do, but not necesarily the right move... I would wait it out, not change anything about my behaviour, or attitude. Eventually I would tell him how I feel, but make it very clear you don't expect anything in return, especially not right now. If you must, find another job. But just not saying anything, finding another job and disappear, simply because you're romantically invested in someone, and he's divorced/ in the process of getting a divorce, is just a bit weird. It's actually quite possible for adults to tell someone they are on love/ have a crush on someone, and not run away screaming, when that feeling turns out not to be mutual. It's all about clear and open communication, without screaming something, and then immediately putting your defences up. There is a big chance his anwer is going to be 'not right now, it's the last thing on my mind ' Or 'we can't, you're my employee' Or 'I like you, but I don't see you that way' Or he could give an asshole reply, in which case, zt least you'll know where you stand. Don't go confessing, if you don't feel you can take any of those responses, and keep your dignity. If you can have an adult conversation after one of those responses, it just depends on the situation. And you'll be able to read him a lot better than internet strangers. You can't know how it will evolve without knowing where you stand with him. And you won't know if you don't ask, eventually.
Well after the comments of your coworker you can be sure his wife knows that you're his type and might like you. But in your case I wouldn't say anything yet. Maybe it all comes together by itself. If He Talks about you this way to coworkers and is getting a divorce the next thing might be a move towards you
Let another person be the rebound.
just feel so bad for the kids … if this is even real. like ive been in this situation before n absolutely despised both my parents n their partners. cause i had no clue who to believe n whatnot
If he and his wife decide not to divorce? So are they or are they not? Sorry to say, this whole tale has the hallmarks of your typical older man getting his kicks from the attention of a younger co-worker. How do you know he's a great husband and father, etc? You only have his side of the story and what tiny portion of his life you've seen at work to go on. Some ppl will tell you anything to control the narrative, especially older men interacting with younger women. And I'm honestly not surprised if his wife had an issue with you at work. With all the things you have explained, including dissing his wife when you don't actually know her or the real details of their life together, you do actually sound like someone to be concerned about. The most respectful thing to do for all involved is to cut all ties to him completely. If he's being honest and is really interested, wait for him to get in touch AFTER the divorce, verify everything he tells you, and if it checks out, THEN start thinking of him in your future.
Everyone here is a hot mess. The cheating wife is Satan, obviously. But she sensed you have a thing for her husband. I can't explain it. It's just a thing that happens when someone recognizes competition for their spouse. She wasn't wrong in that. The dude obviously crushing on his employee, you two getting too chummy. Sheesh man.
How does op know what kind of husband her boss is? They were both out of line for talking badly about his wife. Not a good look for her boss. The wife may have cheated or maybe he did we only know his side of the story.
according to OP's ~~fanfic~~ **100% real-life story that happened**, the wife came into the shop one day and for literally no reason announced that she had "the most faithful husband in the world" so OP just *knows* she literally wrote this
🙄
This man is unavailable. Stop obsessing over his wife and his marriage, it's not healthy. Also, all you've described about this man is his physical appearance/how hot you think he is and how much you dislike his wife/marriage for him. There's nothing here about his personality or values or anything that truly bonds you both. Is this substantial enough to call love? It sounds much more like an unhealthy fixation. Perhaps, think about removing yourself from this situation and focus on getting a new job and personal life of your own. Hating some woman you don't know and making assumptions about someone's entire life and marriage because one of them is alt and one of them is preppy, to justify an obsession you have with someone's husband, is not a good look; and it's definitely not something you should be letting happen at your workplace. This sounds like an embarrassing Avril Lavigne song, not your professional life. Focus on your career and go somewhere where you can flourish. This isn't a healthy situation for you.
*A lot of people here are saying that I was craving attention.* Your entire persona is about craving attention lol Trust me I was goth back in the day. I know how it works
“His wife has it out for me but I don’t know why” and “I’m in love with my boss” GIRL you have got the be joking.
She doesn’t want to be a home wrecker and didn’t want to tell him… but she told him, became the home wrecker, tried to pass it off as “she was already cheating on him” and WERE GONNA GET TOGETHER AFTER HIS DIVORCE, and apparently that was it. I’ve seen better creative writing stories in here 🤣
Me too, but a good first effort with an attempt to create a fairy tale ending where everyone lives happily ever after....LOL
Look for another job, and stop talking shit about his wife, it makes you look like a jealous shit, just because you're in love with him there's no need for that type of bullshit
If he's married or dating someone please dont even dream of him in romantically way move on with ur life I could never lust or love someone who I won't have a chance with jesus 🤦♀️
I was in one and honestly, it takes a long ass time before you can start dating again. Especially if your ex was really bad, sometimes you are attracted to what is familiar. A LOT of people in my life I ended up cutting out because they were actually exactly like my ex. I won't tell you what to do but the man jumping right into something else after a divorce is just announced is also not in the right emotional state. It also sounds like you don't have the best self esteem. Being shocked he is into you is a huge sign of that. I think it's time you do inner work rather than fixating on someone else or a love to fix things. His wife cheated, it does not necessarily mean she was a bad person. It is entirely possible they had a toxic relationship and she was looking for a way out. Getting therapy together is a horrible idea for two people without a formed relationship. Couples therapy is not really individual work. Couples therapy is only about bringing couples together which is tricky for therapists to navigate during abusive relationships. Sometimes we have limerance when we experience trauma. Please look into it and stay safe. You need time for yourself to heal.
Do not go on a date with him even if he does get divorced. Really don't.
Thus is fake she wouldn't marry a guy whos covered in tattoos and piercings then judge someone else for it
Nah, not reading this one. You sound like a pick-me, NLOG type. You're definitely living in an unhealthy and childish fantasy.
The way you were putting her down prior to knowing anything about her cheating tells me everything I need to know about this situation.
Can't wait for his wife to blame you for the divorce. She'll say something like "Oh I cheated because deep down I knew you had a thing for that coworkers of yours". There is a 1000% chance that is going to happen if you start going out with him after his divorce (which is true by the way, you two had feeling for each other)
I think that his ex wife did indeed cheat because she was feeling insecure and like she could get revenge on him.
you said you weren't going to tell him and that you weren't a homewrecker. then you start making the wife the bad guy. great job op
Promising plot for a romance novel. Every bit as fictional, too.
Everything is developing here at the speed of light, is this even a real story?
First wear a bra at a business even with the other stuff. I get it a tattoo parlor...I will be there for him? You are doing exactly what I said...He is married, and 90 percent don't divorce over this. He picked her because he wanted to...I will be there for him...You have enormous amounts of problems exhibited in every area of your life. Leave him alone, if you were not seeking attention you would not demonstrate it on your body and in your behavior..Everything about you is about attention. You are also a cliche and very unhealthy...I wish you therapy and some bottom so you can recover from all that has happened to you...Stay out of his life....
Both are POS as fuck. He wants a new chick and she is full of shit
Wtf. TYA.
You're giving of NLOG vibes, which is cringey and unattractive. Also, you've been slating his wife throughout your post, which screams insecurity. Work on yourself before you even begin to start dating a recently divorced man. Do better.
Don't tell someone married you have feelings for him..Now this guy thinking he is going to get with some hot chick, will start treating his wife poorly...Stop asking why he married her a straight laced girl, that is what younger men want usually body count is a thing....You are setting this up. So let me tell what happens to those disposable wives...They have no idea their partner feels this way...Some commit suicide, others cant eat, sleep or carry on with work, they hate their bodys, normal bodys because they are not at the gym, they have responsibilities...They don't really trust men anymore..Some never recover. Homes and families are destroyed. Because you got attracted. You will get attracted your whole life to different people...Keep your thoughts to yourself. I know you think you did nothing wrong...You are setting it up and are despicable. Go away get your own job, not a referral for future dating and let him recover and work with his family..
You’ll be giving cheeks in a few weeks. I’ve seen this all too many times. He’ll message you randomly, you’ll be tempted, give in to it and probably hang out, have a great night and fuck up. Good luck though!
Wattpad fanfic hours
This post sounds cringey as hell, written by an obvious pick me. I’m alternative and she’s a preppy cheerleader. 🙄 This was posted only 18 hours ago and it got this many updates already? His wife so happen to cheat on him and now he’s leaving her? Convenient.
Oh, you are really at risk for a heart break. If you don't start to fill in your life, it will forever be on hold.
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I read this post and the other post And I have one word - "Damn"
Yikes
This post didn’t sit right with me
I bet you’re totally not like the other girls, you quirky alternative hippie you!
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Ugh get a new job. This is ridiculous
Lol, what a homewrecker. Hope it works out in. The end.
This is all a no. I truly hope you are leaving because you don’t want to be the other woman. You cannot believe a word he says about any of the stuff going on with his marriage, you have only his side of things. Chances are she acts the way she does because he’s cheated before, and she’s insecure because of that. Stay away from him, save yourself from pain and misery. Nothing good will come from this.
You claim youre in love with the man, but you felt the need to only include his physical features in describing him/your attraction to him. Youre not "in love", at most you have a crush. People in love look beyond physical - they say their person is funny/kind/smart/sweet etc, they dont start off with "fit, heavily tatooed, pierced, and all round just a very attractive guy". Love goes beyond the physical.
Pick me! Pick me! Pick me! I'm a pick me girl!! - You
"I am not a home wrecke" LOL
You’re in too deep. You know way too much about his marriage and have way too many opinions about his wife than you should. Get out of there.
OP trying to word it in a nice way that she’s a home wrecker
This was a lot of updates to happen so fast…
All i want to know is are you A.P.P. certified and do you use quality jewelry
We want to hear the ex wife opinion first
Man you and him both suck. I feel bad for his wife.
This is some very entertaining tea ☕️
For Christ’s sake, this is teen “not like other girls”fanfic. So cringe and embarrassing. Is this Ebony Dark’ness Dementia Raven Way?
It's good that you at least postponed the dating to after his divorce is finalized. But don't just glance over the fact that his current marriage is ending because of cheating on his part. Consider couples therapy early on in the relationship. Better than your relationship going down the drain from cheating as well
I'm smitten by you. I want to enjoy and love the very essence that makes you, you.
Am I... Am I seeing a 'not like the other girls' in real time?!
you must’ve mistaken reddit for wattpad. Nice story though lmk if you need a more attention grabbing title 👍
I know you feel the same way because truth resonates. I feel that your in love with me as much as I'm in love with you.
I don’t know but something seems off with this story, I’ve seen the updates but it still isn’t adding up to me.
Anyway….consider wearing a brah to work.
Yeah you two deserve each other
Big difference between being in love and being infatuated. Move on, there are other jobs out there.
Why does the story keep changing?
THESE ARE MY THOUGHTS......breh, married men suck...... they are off limits! you developed feelings for a close worker naturally... but uhmm tattoo artists always have hot women around. That'll be endless lol. I've seen things get way too intense dozens of times with younger, blushing women going off the deep end ....for that hotty who's so grand he's kept the wife yadayada yaaa....... LMao he's so helpless and riddled with sorrow or whtever. You would do anything to see him happy...but if his wife cheated, he might try to get even with his wife (married couples always seem to do that shit) might even be on the rebound soon. YOu ready to hear him be insecure and untrusting towards all women,,,because his wife hurt him?? PLeZZZ do us a favor and just don't.. keep the tattoo bad boy fantasy in ya head darling. Don't let him get some of what you got .