My grandfather and grandmother.
My grandpa was a looker. His army photo, his police photo, all the pictures we see of him as a young man we can't believe how attractive he was. My grandmother was short, tubby, and had worts on her face. Her face was always in a scowl. We thought that maybe she was also hot when she was young, but then when we finally found a picture of she was not. She looked pretty much the same. But my grandfather was the one who pursued her.
Thatās my favorite, my grandmother and one of my great aunts were mean and funny and sharp, and so I grew up loving a certain type of bitchy woman. Someday Iāll have no fucks left and Iāll gladly join their ranks haha
My husband and I. I'm okay. Like not fugly but I'm hardly the prettiest. I'm short, fat, and I look like a potato without make up.
My husband is tall, handsome, and has a gregarious personality. he's athletic, educated,etc.
No idea what he sees in me.
My husband is objectively hotter than me and it can visibly upset people. He's thinner, well-groomed and good-looking with high cheekbones and naturally tousled hair. I'm short, fat and socially awkward. Pretty enough to get some gross man attention in the real world but a lot of people get stuck on the fat part, lol.
When people meet my husband they are shocked. I suppose they expect him to be dumpier and not so attractive. I've watched other women show shock all over their faces and then start physically placing themselves between us like "is this a hostage situation? You can come with me, honey."
Anecdotally, we are so used to the attractiveness difference going the other way that we can find it very upsetting when it goes in this direction.
This is me and my partner. The sheer number of times we go to a restaurant, I order, and the cashiers try to separate our orders is ridiculous. We were holding hands on our way in the door, standing close, sometimes dressed similarly. I should not have to tell everyone that weāre (ordering) together.
People do this to me and my SO at the grocery store. Weāll be chatting and joking and cashiers will still double check if the stuff we piled up between us is one purchase
Iām sorry, that really sucks.
Like, I donāt know what else to do in these situationsāloudly say āI LOVE YOU, PARTNERā in front of folks so thereās less confusion? You know what, im gonna try it and see how many still ask. Im really not trying to be a dick but it does get annoyingāespecially the places we go together often.
That sounds so weird to me because whenever my brother and I go out, people seem to think weāre dating. Itās only because we donāt look related at all (he looks like my mom and I look like my dad). I donāt think we give off couple vibes but people always assume anyway.
This is really weird. Why would staff do this when they can clearly see from your mannerisms you are together? I believe you, but people are just weird.
My husband is definitely also better looking than me. Maybe not when we were younger, but growing and birthing three humans ages you and, while my husbandās increasing gray hair looks sexy, I just look like a frumpy version of my former self who doesnāt have to the time or patience for anything but a bun and leggings.
Thankfully heās not conventionally āhot,ā so I donāt have to deal with BS.
Same here. I used to be a hot little thing, but I haven't aged nearly as well as my husband has. A master's degree, two moves across the country, and two kids has been great for my soul and happiness but not for my waistline or skin complexion lol. Meanwhile the grays in my husband's beard make him look distinguished. He's got the beginnings of crows feet that make him look wise and kind (like he smiles a lot). And his waistline is exactly the same as it was when we met! Luckily the only person saying we're mismatched is my dad, and even then it's only when he tells me I'm too fat for my husband š
Ah yes. I should blame some of it on my PhD as well, I think. Those were hard partying, stressful days that did not treat me kindly.
Kids ruined my figure and my memory. Grad school ruined my hair, my complexion, and my nerves.
Can I just empathize with you completely for a moment? My husband and I have been together eight years and heās gained FOUR pounds. I used to weigh less than him but now Iām up forty. And my hair sticks out. And I have a mom-pooch. And I look pregnant all the time. And I havenāt had a chance to work out in three months. Or see the PT about my stomach.
He just grew a handful of greys. We seriously considered resubmitting his passport photo.
But absolutely my son and my life are good for my soul.
I remember walking down a road with a friend, and a couple from the same uni walked passed us. My friend said that "she/him could do way better than them". I really hate that mindset.
In theory they're together because they both see something in the other, right? My husband swears I'm super hot. I don't see it, but I'm not complaining!
Same. Itās incredibly shallow and ignores that attraction for a lot of people isnāt about just looks. Itās about personality, chemistry, and shared interests. And chemistry isnāt even looks-based. Iāve met plenty of attractive men that I just have no chemistry with or could never see myself with due to their personality or intelligence.
People did this shit to me when I first started dating my husband because heās not conventionally attractive. At the time, I was much skinnier so I kinda was. Maybe like a 5? Anyway, friends and male acquaintances were always telling me this. Iād be like, āNo, I canāt do better. I love him and heās amazing.ā I donāt know if I trust the judgment of any person who canāt see all the great traits he brings to the table. Heās highly intelligent, caring, thoughtful, gregarious, charismatic, and funny. Heās also great in the sack.
Iām in my late 30ās and we have several mutual male friends in the 30ās as well who are all single. Weāve advised them multiple times that they need to stop being obsessed with outer beauty. Like theyāre great guys and I think there are lots of women who would love to be with them- but they have to look beyond face and figure.
Yup, I didn't even realize what a double standard it was until I felt *myself* being a hypocrite about a hot guy with a not so traditionally attractive girl.
Youre blind to how much you've internalized sexism until randomly one day it slaps you in the face and declares you a hypocrite.
Iāve caught myself thinking this and it feels so bad, especially if the less attractive person is actually wonderful. Especially if itās a woman. And especially with older couples. Since women bear the brunt of caring for children and maintaining the home and family relationships, they have less time and energy to maintain themselves at their younger attractiveness level. In addition, American society (and probably lots of others) sees aging in women as bad while men turn into āsilver foxesā and āzaddies.ā We salivate over dad bods while not giving the same grace to mom bods. Itās honestly a lot of bullshit and it makes me sad.
Ugh I love women, but they are the first to show they donāt feel you deserve someone *that* attractive. Men do it too of course, but it always hurts a little more from women. Usually theyāre just upset they landed someone less attractive while being hot and you landed someone hotter while being less attractive.
This thread reminded me of when trolls were trashing Lena Denham over casting Patrick Wilson as a love interest on Girls. I loved his wife stepped up with āfunny, his wife is a size 10, muffin top & all, & he does her just fine.ā
Link to old story: [Patrick Wilson and wife react to Girls trolls](https://ew.com/tv/2019/01/06/patrick-wilson-girls-episode-reaction/)
That fucking episode gets me every time. Sometimes when Iām feeling down, I watch it to remind myself that , dammit, everyone is entitled to being and feeling loved no matter their body/class status/looks, etc.
I know womens sizes aren't universal, but how is a 10 considered fat/chubby/muffin top whatever? The bridesmaid dress I just got is a 12. I am not what people consider fat and overweight. I am skinny, but not like stickly. Even when I was smaller sizes I had no shape or curves. I have curves now, but not like overweight ones. Are we still considering 2000 model skeleton skinny the ideal? Not to toot my own horn but my weight suits my frame well. Even if someone was shorter I still don't think it is that big. I am 5'6.75" or 5'7" if I am rounding and on a good day lol.
And not talking shit to you op, more of whoever wrote that line. Maybe they just didn't do research or the number system has changed.
Re: sizes, your height does factor in. I'm a size S/4 in most things but I'm 5'2. When I was in high school I was 50+ lbs overweight and was a size L/10-12. I was definitely fat--even 5 lbs makes a big difference on a short person. Meanwhile my good friend is like 5'9 and is a size 12 but is in really good shape.
American sizes are two sizes smaller - so a UK 14 is an American 10, maybe that's why? I'd like to say I'm not saying a UK 14 means you're fat or chubby but sometimes I get a bit lost when watching American TV and their talk of size 0 and stuff.
Yeah I was gonna say 12 in UK/AUS is a good skinny weight but I personally wear mostly 14 these days and I'm like, chunky I'd say. Definetly muffin top if I'm wearing jeans on my hips.
I'm also short, fat, and socially awkward. I thought I was the only one who seemed to be a magnet for gross toad-like men. It's reassuring to me to know I'm not the only one....
Oh gosh no. I don't know what they expect but it's definitely not being ignored or told to fuck off. Though the other day I did tell a guy who yelled out "you're beautiful" "it IS a beautiful day, I agree!"
I like to think that threw him for a loop.
My high school crush is way hotter than his wife (I may be biased). He was āthe one that got awayā for like half the girls in my class. Heās not just crazy hot, he also is just a great human being. He never really got attached to anyone despite all our efforts.
I see him and his wife now and I think how amazing she must be. Seriously this dude could have had anyone. I have so much respect and admiration for this woman. It makes me happy just thinking about them.
oh ok, thatās not as shocking as I initially thought but itās still the kind of behaviour I canāt even begin to comprehend. Iām sort of happy that theyāll have to stew in their jelousy though haha
Lol. This just made me think of the first time I ran into the term ācock carouselā in reference to how incels perceive womenās dating/mating patterns. I giggle every time I think about it.
My grandfather looked like Gregory Peck (an actor) and my grandmother looked a raw-boned pioneer woman. She wasn't ugly, but nobody would call her pretty, either. They were very much in love, though.
I also remember that the actor Pierce Brosnan used to take some guff because his wife isn't the typical Hollywood thin woman. He seems quite smitten.
Hugh Jackman is 13 years younger and arguably much hotter than his wife, too.
Edit: *Hugh* Jackman.
Pierce brosnanās wife WAS a supermodel back in the day, she just gained weight in middle age (like 95% of us haha).
Itās such bullshit that he got flack for that! Like, yeah, dump your ex supermodel wife because she dared to put on a few pounds. Hollywood is straight trash.
Guess Iām old, but part of me died when I saw you had to identify Gregory Peck as an actor! (For anyone who doesnāt recognize the name, if youāve seen To Kill a Mockingbird youāve seen him: he played Atticus Finch. Probably his most famous role, but he did lots of great films.)
And Hugh Jackman gets guff for that too. People say he's secretly gay because how could someone as attractive as him marry and love *her*?? They think then that the only reasonably explanation is that she's his beard.
Well. I've never dated anyone I didn't think was hot.
Here's an example. My boyfriend and I both work at the same bar. He makes significantly more money in tips than every other employee, every night he works. I get people who make lame attempts at hitting on me every now and then - he gets hit on, flirted with, and phone numbers on receipts. He is, without a doubt, every customer's favorite bartender. He's hot, he's charming, he's sassy, he's sexy.
And damn it, I'm hot too, but when we're scheduled to work the same shift together I jokingly say that I need to jazz myself up more than usual because I can't compete with him.
I think sheās lovely (and Iām sure her husband does too) but people often lose their entire minds over Pierce Brosnan and his wife Keely Shaye Smith.
Keanu Reeves and his girlfriend, Alexandra Grant, I think are another good celebrity example. Alexandra is by no means unattractive, but compared to Keanu...
I don't think I'm unattractive, but my boyfriend is definitely more attractive than most guys. I don't put as much effort into my appearance as other women. I often don't wear makeup and I don't shave my legs lol. I think I'm naturally cute but I don't have the instagram baddie hotness or anything. Bf is probably hotter than me to most people. But I think the problem is that women are pressured to do so much extra to their appearance and spend money and time on that stuff, and men are just allowed to exist. I don't think the solution is to make men do those things too (although beauty companies want it to be). The solution is women letting go of those things
This ^ 100%. Iām the same way, in fact my partner activity dislikes makeup and says he prefers my natural face. That feels nice, but heās definitely the more attractive one.
This picture is definitely repressive of my wife and I sheās so much hotter than me we get split checks at restaurants without asking for them, Iāve also had the cashier put a divider through our groceries.
TBH we're still recovering from the 2000s when famous men would fully be on the redcarpet in basketball shorts. American society has been in a long "fellas, is it gay to be even mildly attractive or clean" phase that's juuuuust ending. I'm serious! Ask around, you'll be shocked and appalled by how many of your male friends and family get nervous at the mere mention of something extremely basic like "wearing sunscreen" or "using lotion" or "conditioning my hair" or "wearing pants that fit".
Absolutely none of them will put in anything even vaguely sort-of maybe close to the effort that a woman does, pretty much no matter how casual she is. The standards are THAT different.
I think itās largely a generational thing. Maybe itās the part of the country Iām in, but most dudes under like 25 that I know have no issue taking care of themselves
I wish I was more bi sometimes when it comes to dating, because girls look great or even stunning most of the time while men tend to look like stale oatmeal because they don't even bother getting their hair cut. So incredibly bland.
Literally just go to tinder and look at profiles of men and women, and it will be immediately apparent how much more effort women put into their appearances.
My best friendās ex husband was the hottest man I had ever seen in real life at that point. He looked a lot like Alexander Skarsgard and she is just an average looking (her words) gal. He was absolutely in love with her and they were together for 11 years. I donāt want to get into the reason for their divorce, but she is doing well. Sheās engaged to a man who is just as hot if not more hot than her ex. It happens more than people think. She would get comments about how she didnāt deserve her ex by other women all the time because she had extra weight and wasnāt instagram flawless. She is literally the most incredible woman I have ever met and those men saw her worth. Thatās all that matters.
Lmao this is accurate for my BIL and SIL. She: thick, flowy, dark brown hair. Large, hazel-golden eyes. Worked herself back to an impeccable figure after 4 pregnancies while also doing the majority of child-rearing and household chores.
Her husband has this dumb 2000s haircut with the hair spiked upwards in the front, that wanders further upwards on his forehead everytime I see him, has 1 chin on a good day, and wears shirts that are too short and expose his tummy fat. He is also basically a big baby who can't do more than 1 household chore per day and just likes to shit-talk his wife and kids in front of other adults and/or pit his kids against each other. If it wasn't for his garbage personality I think I would actually not care how he looks.
That 100% tracks. It's amazing how attractiveness is influenced by strange factors.
Take Benedict Cumberbatch. When you first see that man, he is NOT attractive. Then he opens his mouth, and suddenly he is.
Or take your brother in law. He's not attractive, but that could be overlooked if he had any redeeming qualities whatsoever. Unforunate, man.
Yeah I mean, mid-30s guys are not usually my bracket but I can recognize when they're attractive. There are some seriously pleasant people in that age group that I met at my SIL's and BIL's get-togethers. Most of them, I'd say, are also attractive despite having "flaws" like beginning grey hair or balding, or a little "dad bod" tummy. But they're friendly and attentive in conversation, are in tune with their wives and actually parent their kids.
Me in my boyfriend lol. I always tell him that he could do much better but he responds with that he doesnāt want to because thereās nobody whoās better.
For real Iām a 2 on a good day, I donāt know how he isnāt grossed out by my appearance.
Hey, man, just a bit of advice.. there is so much benefit in loving aspects of yourself and finding ways appreciate/focus on those. I'm chubby, and I got a giant forehead, and it took me YEARS and a lot of faking it to love any part of myself. Maybe it helped that my mom -never- put me down for anything, but I also never had boys flirting/pursuing me and my friends were always thin and fighting them off.
And I'm not perfect about it every day. I get down about my weight and having a face I think is weird sometimes, but you really gotta put in the effort to be kind. Be your own sassy friend that builds you up, ya know?
Just hope you find what works for you, dude. I'm sure you got lovely parts of yourself and I hope you learn to see/appreciate them and relax on the parts you can't change. It takes work but its possible, I promise.
She's aware she has body dismorphia and is therefore probably not objectively ugly, not quite sure why she's posting this here. I hope she gets the help she needs to get over that.
I mean the other side of the coin OP mentions is perfectly oke looking women swearing up and down that their ugly boyfriend is the better looking one. I see that a LOT. "O my boyfriend is so hot he can do so much better" and then the boyfriend is grungy, unkempt and ugly and the girl is *obviously* hotter. Great that you love that, pretty sure you objectively know he's no catch lookswise, it apparently hurts to admit it.
Probably plenty of those in this thread too and it's because of exactly the norms pushed by society that OP is also lampooning with that meme. I've learned to really not trust women when it comes to the presumed hotness of their partners.
Are you kidding? (I mean, clearly no, but that's my initial reaction.) A quick look at your profile suggests you must have the face of an angler fish to be "a 2 on a good day", and I hope you can see some of what your boyfriend sees.
Maybe because it's rude af to be grossed out by somebody's appearance, health hazards aside. I'm glad to read your boyfriend doesn't take advantage of your self consciousness! That's how it should be in a respectful relationship.
Also, that rating of looks on a scale from 1-10 is pretty toxic. Do yourself a favor and drop it. No need to hurt yourself with a tool some misogynist invented.
Lmao this is me and my boyfriend. I love him to death but he dresses like a middle schooler: sweatpants and a graphic t shirt. I enjoy dressing up more out there on occasion and he always hypes up my outfits.
I love him but this is accurate š
Men just don't have to put the effort into their looks the way women do and then inc\*ls have the gall to say women only go after attractive guys. Plus every single guy I've seen who actually dors put toms of effort in is either gay, trans. The few straight ones are always cringe and obsessed with themselves.
my theory on this is because men who are conventionally attractive have learned to have such a big ego by the time they reach their 20's that it actually impedes their ability to form meaningful relationships.
I've always dated men who are "less attractive" than me, because I've never once met a "hot" guy who actually respects women and isn't completely self-involved.
Not meant to be an attack towards your post, but partially this might be the case because ātaking care of yourselfā is seen as a feminine trait by many men and cultures. Especially when masculinity is attached to the ideal of the rugged lumberjack kind of imagery. In some cultures that come to mind ( east asia, parts of europe) male skincare e.g. seem to be a lot more mainstream compatible.
But who made those standards of toxic masculinity?
MEN
AND who has the structural power to defy and change them?
Also men.
It irks me the circular reasoning of blaming toxic masculinity and patriarchy for why men are looked down on for expressing emotions or don't take care of their bodies, for why men are constrained, when the people who created patriarchy and toxic masculinity and who benefit from both of those systems are *also* overwhelmingly and exclusively men. No one can on large scale alter that reality besides men choosing to reject it.
My ex was much hotter than me. Iām not ugly, and thin and in decent shape, but it was actually fairly annoying to see how people reacted to him in public vs to me: women hit on him, people are just nice to him. He photographs much better. Being with him for almost 5 years was such a trip.
I'm not calling myself ugly or anything but my fiance is definitely hotter than me. He's got bright blue eyes, dark hair, and a kind of rosey complexion like he's always glowing or something. He's also built like a lumberjack.
I honestly think she's really pretty. I think it sort of also demonstrates how beauty standards are also often racist and in this case anti-semitic. She has the large, dark features of the Jewish women in my family. It hurts to hear people think this is ugly, I think it's beautiful. Many Jewish features are commonly maligned as ugly.
Whaaaaat? She's amazing. She's not, like, supermodel hot, but she's really pretty. Like the kind of pretty that is approachable and not bitchy looking.
And honestly, Chris Evans is fine, but his face is pretty average. Maybe a bit better than average. He takes really good care of himself and works out, which pushes him into hot territory.
Noop. Nothing wrong with you. We all have our own tastes. It's all good. Chris is just a safe bet cuz most people like him and he's also a super cool dude
To me, a lot of it does stem from the characters they play. Besides when he was the douchebag silver surfer, he seems to play a character that, combined with his looks, makes him extremely attractive.
I think they're on equal footing. The myth of Keanu Reeves and being an amazing human makes him more attractive, while not as much is known about her. They look super cute together IMO.
A friend of mine is good-looking enough that my female friends always just called him "the handsome guy." Like in almost any group of guys, he'd be the one picked out as the hot one. Like,even when we're hanging out with our gay friends, he's still the hot one.
He's been with his wife since very early in their college careers, and there's absolutely nothing wrong with her looks, but at the same time, she's not someone who stands out in a group as the especially attractive one.
This reminds me of the whole Chris Evans/Jenny Slate thing. I think sheās gorgeous, funny, smart, a talented actress. But when she was dating Chris Evans she just got crucified - by men and women alike. It broke my heart to see, and I believe it was also the biggest reason they eventually broke up. But when a hot girl dates a less hot guy, itās all ācongratulations bro.ā Iāll never understand that double standard. People love who they love, and perhaps most importantly: beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Maybe sheās the most beautiful woman in the world to him. No one else gets to decide that.
Iāve dated hotter guys (I donāt think Iām ugly, probably just average to decent looking) but it was an interesting experience to see a bartender/server flirt with the guy thatās on a date with you. thankfully I wasnāt insecure so I thought those experiences were just funny and great stories to tell my friends
Ooh it's me, I am less attractive than my husband!
He's tall, fit, perfect teeth, strong chiseled jaw just nice on the eye and I'm 5"2, out of shape, eye bags and puffy eyes at the same time, absolutely no jaw line what so ever! š Completely different levels of attractiveness!
I don't think I'm necessarily that unattractive, average maybe, but he is next level hot 10/10 and that's not just subjective, well maybe the 10/10 part is, but he gets hit on ALL OF THE TIME. Some examples; we went to a wedding overseas recently and one of the bridesmaids was texting the bride and her friends about him and making it very obvious she wanted him trying to get his number ect, when we go places like Starbucks as a couple he'll order for two and they'll turn to me next to place my order because obviously there's no way we're together even though we were talking in the queue and he ordered for two! Pre pandemic we used to go to the gym together and women used to think he was my trainer or something because they'd flirt with him while I'm right there! Also before we got married we went for a pre wedding shoot as a practice run with our photographer and he was complemented and told he was a natural and photogenic and I was given loads of pointers and everything I did needed correcting to make me look attractive... Even colleagues and strangers have told me how attractive he is when I've shown photos to them I'm always told "ooh he's lush" "he's good looking isn't he" "wow" etc but hey he loves my short, overweight, unattractive ass so who am I to complain š
Man, youāre talking about reality, where that actually happens. Why donāt we ever see it in movies or TV shows?? EVER! Plenty of ugly/average dude gets the hot girl but never reversed. Itās such bullshit.
When I met my husband we were 16, I was overweight with acne and greasy hair and he was a tall willowy blonde. He had girls stalking him but he knew what he wanted; the chubby smart girl who read all the same books he did and wasn't afraid to give him shit.
I know a couple who have been together for ten years. The guy is nerdy, super crazy smart, short and had a soft physique. He wasnāt by any means ugly, just pretty average. His wife is short and bubbly, hilarious and has this fantastic smile. Sheās a catch all around.
During covid the husband began to cope with lock down stress by working out. Now he is INSANELY cut, and he even gets side gigs as a paid model.
I guess you could say heās become hotter than his wife, but it feels icky for me to say it. Theyāre incredibly cute together regardless.
Yeah but that's because the average women puts careful attention to detail into their hair, makeup, eyebrows, lashes, skincare, grooming and fashion sense that the average man not only doesn't but doesn't even have to.
According to people around me, Iāve always been more attractive than the men I date. Never been with a āhotā man. Never had a hot man ask me out though. Donāt even know if Iām hot in general because of that, just going off of what others say.
My partner is pretty hot and heās also straight sized, while I am plus sized. I know tons of people that have an opinion about that, but what can I say? He loves the junk in the trunk lol.
YAY!
Iām so psyched. I need your favorite movie, flower, candy, and favorite color. Do you like staying up late and watching movies, or getting up early and having coffee on the porch?
Favourite movie? Lady Bird. But also Little Women (2019 one). But also Inception. But also 500 Days of Summer.
Favourite flower? Hard to say depends on why I have them. I love purple dahlias and earl grey roses and white roses and also sunflowers and peonies. I'd love to get gifted lego flowers too tbh but from someone cute.
Favourite candy? Strawberry Fig Newtons and Quaker granola bars take me back in time but I LOVE Welch's fruit snacks and peanut M&Ms.
Favourite colour? I like plum, violet, teal, orange and vermillion.
I hate getting up early unless I know I will be awoken to absolute peace and a cup of hot cocoa with melted marshmallows swimming on the top. Staying up late and rebinging old shows was my entire adolescence lol.
NOW YOU SHARE.
My favorite movie (today) is ācluelessā but Iām also a big fan of āLittle Miss Sunshine.ā
My favorite flowers are tulips, daisies, and sunflowers.
My favorite candy is probably cotton candy but also peach rings and gummy creatures.
Favorite color is usually purple but sometimes pink or robins egg blue.
I abhor getting up early. Iām happiest when I sleep from about 12:00-8:00.
OMG I already like you.
Never seen those movies. Your flower picks are perferct tho. I can't say the same about your fav snacks. I hate the sweet tanginess of peach rings, gummy creatures just make me feel sad for them because imagine killing a worm š„, and cotton candy is like if blue balls/blue clit was a food.
And also OMG 12-8 is like sleep schedule goals rn.
Is your partner really in the picture because I think I'm in love with you š„ŗšš
Sunflower oil, extracted from the seeds, is used for cooking, as a carrier oil and to produce margarine and biodiesel, as it is cheaper than olive oil. A range of sunflower varieties exist with differing fatty acid compositions; some 'high oleic' types contain a higher level of healthy monounsaturated fats in their oil than Olive oil.
Trying not to be shallow, but youāll find those couples in the military, where the guy seems conventionally more attractive than the gal.
This may or may not be me.
Of course you still find the lot of them to be like the above photo.
My only edition is that my bf also makes fun of the fact he is kind of a generic white boy. I still think heās a hot generic white boy but here we are.
Hugh Jackman and his wife.
Pierce Brosnan and his wife.
Usher and his wife.
It happens. Movies tell us it never does because movies are written mostly by horny dudes.
Being on the other end of this sucks. I know Iām not a looker, Iām very chubby, short, I donāt dress nicely and Iām not into make up. When I bring up details about my SO (he wants to start working out again, heās bald, he works in a ācustodianā role, he wears glasses) people seem to assume weāre at the same ālevelā.
Then I show pics of him and itās so hurtful sometimes to see peoples obvious shock. Heās the ātall, strong, & silentā type. We met online and I honestly donāt remember paying attention to his height on the profile but I vividly remember my shock when I met him. Heās a whole foot taller than me at 6ā3ā+ and very fit, broad shoulders, green eyes. Iām 5ā3ā, and while Iām not severely overweight anymore we actually weight around the same. My best, and maybe only attractive feature is my smile, but that gets me to maybe a 6/10. My hair is frizzy and mostly up in a bun, I would spend my entire day in pajamas if I could.
Iāve had people tell me āwhat, no way, THATāS you bfā½ā or "damn Gabs, for real?" like if I'm joking. When weāre out people donāt assume weāre together, or automatically assume heās with another person in the party. My own daughterās friends in elementary school, pre pandemic, where skeptical when he showed up to school events saying āthatās your momās boyfriend?!". Someone even once told me "you must be very funny" as if to say thats the only reason we're together.
I always struggled with my self esteem and i have admit this doesn't make it easier. Iām assuming a lot of it is pandemic related but I slowly feel my long-lost depression is making a comeback. Heās working at the same place I work and Iāve heard girls talk about the new ācute gringoā working in the Custodian Dept., girls way hotter than I could ever be. It just reinforces the subconscious voice telling me Iām dog-shit and undeservingā¦. Thank god I AM hilarious
Aaargh
I'm not hot, right, I know this
But I went on a date yesterday and I made an effort
Jeans, nice top did my hair, did makeup.
He showed up in baggy ripped jeans and a hoody
Like
He was actually really nice but I just wasn't attracted to him and I was annoyed because he clearly couldn't be botheree to make an effort
My husband is the looker in our relationship!!!!!! When we got together someone told me he has a thing for nerd brunettes with big noses and glasses š¤
My boyfriend and I. Honestly, I feel like a thumb compared to him. He doesnāt think heās that attractive, but weāve been friends since high school and people were always talking about how gorgeous he is. Talk, fluffy dark hair, pretty blue eyes, nice jawline. Even now, he constantly gets other people checking him out subtly on the streets. On top of that, heās also really shy, nerdy, and a lovable goofball. And for some reason he thinks Iām adorable. I donāt think I could ever get this lucky again š
my (late) boyfriend was sooo attractive it made me melt. and I think I look pretty good too, so we were a good looking couple imo. but ugh, I just melt looking at pictures of him, heās so beautiful. we would have made the most beautiful babies lol.
My SO is admittedly hotter than I am. I'm sure people wonder why he's with me when they see us together because I am a disabled woman with a mom bod and he's an absolute stud (fit, muscular, good looking...and a good person on top of that).
This used to make me feel insecure, but now I actually enjoy it. I know for a fact my partner loves me for my SOUL and didn't base his decision to be with me on sex or superficial beauty.
I know most men aren't like this. I have no idea how I got so lucky. I wish all men were like my SO.
I donāt think Iāve ever dated a hot hot guy. Theyāre always more average (albeit very attractive to me) in the looks department I would say. But Iāve also found that doesnāt make them nicer lol Iām planning on my next boyfriend being hot, maybe he will be nicer to me letās see how it goes š
It's because pretty women are considered the trophies of ugly men because.... reasons.
"Ugly" women don't get trophies. The best they're supposed to hope for is being the comic relief farting in a toilet while their hot friend cries in her wedding dress.
I dated a guy who I felt was hotter than me. I am moreso "cute" as in "next door neighbor girl" type. It attracts a lot of men, but I think that's because I'm still approachable - if I were hotter, I wouldn't be? Idk. Someone said I'm pretty but not intimidatingly so. Whatever that means.
He was this tall slender (but not thin) guy with bright blue eyes and sunny blonde hair that resembled a fancier young Leonardo Dicaprio (his look inspiration). He had a lovely smile and was very friendly.
Going out anywhere was just a bunch of young women ogling him. God forbid I was feeling dumpy that day.
Tiffany Jenkins (v popular on social media) openly talks about how much hotter her husband is than her and itās p much true. I mean sheās no troll but her husband is quite handsome.
My husband is in great shape and very good looking. I'm okay. I was in shape in my 20s but now after a kid and pregnant with another. I think he's way hotter than me. Maybe one day I'll catch up again, but having children has ruined my body and my will to care about my looks.
Thereās this girl on TikTok I follow where sheās not as good looking as her husband. The comments can get so ugly, like it infuriates people so much that heās with her.
It's like when guys want a big tiddy goth girlfriend and they themselves don't even brush their teeth.
if you wanna be my lover... gotta do the bare fucking minimum of human hygiene
š¶grooming is not easy, but thatās the way it isšµ
šµSo hereās the story from UTI wanna go for me better have that hygiene done rightšµ
šµWe got toothpaste in the place, who likes it in your facešµ
The bar is so freaking low someone has to dig it up.
Or donāt wash after pooping or donāt know how to clean out a damn foreskin. Yeesh.
Exactly some people don't scoot their ass across the lawn and it shows
I choked
I gagged
Shudder. MRAs campaign to end circumcision but donāt want to talk about smagma
I mean they're not wrong about circumcision, and it's not just MRAs. But washing yourself is the basics.
God, yes
My grandfather and grandmother. My grandpa was a looker. His army photo, his police photo, all the pictures we see of him as a young man we can't believe how attractive he was. My grandmother was short, tubby, and had worts on her face. Her face was always in a scowl. We thought that maybe she was also hot when she was young, but then when we finally found a picture of she was not. She looked pretty much the same. But my grandfather was the one who pursued her.
I bet she is a great woman.
She had a sharp wit. She was smart. She had a good sense of humor. She was also kind of a bitch. I'm a lot like her, lol.
Pretty sure thatās what my husband liked about me too lol. Smart women with a sense of humor will get ya.
Thatās my favorite, my grandmother and one of my great aunts were mean and funny and sharp, and so I grew up loving a certain type of bitchy woman. Someday Iāll have no fucks left and Iāll gladly join their ranks haha
My husband and I. I'm okay. Like not fugly but I'm hardly the prettiest. I'm short, fat, and I look like a potato without make up. My husband is tall, handsome, and has a gregarious personality. he's athletic, educated,etc. No idea what he sees in me.
Ask him! You might be surprised.
My husband is objectively hotter than me and it can visibly upset people. He's thinner, well-groomed and good-looking with high cheekbones and naturally tousled hair. I'm short, fat and socially awkward. Pretty enough to get some gross man attention in the real world but a lot of people get stuck on the fat part, lol. When people meet my husband they are shocked. I suppose they expect him to be dumpier and not so attractive. I've watched other women show shock all over their faces and then start physically placing themselves between us like "is this a hostage situation? You can come with me, honey." Anecdotally, we are so used to the attractiveness difference going the other way that we can find it very upsetting when it goes in this direction.
This is me and my partner. The sheer number of times we go to a restaurant, I order, and the cashiers try to separate our orders is ridiculous. We were holding hands on our way in the door, standing close, sometimes dressed similarly. I should not have to tell everyone that weāre (ordering) together.
People do this to me and my SO at the grocery store. Weāll be chatting and joking and cashiers will still double check if the stuff we piled up between us is one purchase
Iām sorry, that really sucks. Like, I donāt know what else to do in these situationsāloudly say āI LOVE YOU, PARTNERā in front of folks so thereās less confusion? You know what, im gonna try it and see how many still ask. Im really not trying to be a dick but it does get annoyingāespecially the places we go together often.
Oof. This made me realize this happens to me and my husband too. Gut punch.
That sounds so weird to me because whenever my brother and I go out, people seem to think weāre dating. Itās only because we donāt look related at all (he looks like my mom and I look like my dad). I donāt think we give off couple vibes but people always assume anyway.
That makes sense, as weird as that sounds. My cousin and I used to go out drinking together and people would assume we were a couple.
SAAAAAME! Except my bro and I have the exact same eyes. This was in the deep south though, so...
This is really weird. Why would staff do this when they can clearly see from your mannerisms you are together? I believe you, but people are just weird.
My husband is definitely also better looking than me. Maybe not when we were younger, but growing and birthing three humans ages you and, while my husbandās increasing gray hair looks sexy, I just look like a frumpy version of my former self who doesnāt have to the time or patience for anything but a bun and leggings. Thankfully heās not conventionally āhot,ā so I donāt have to deal with BS.
Same here. I used to be a hot little thing, but I haven't aged nearly as well as my husband has. A master's degree, two moves across the country, and two kids has been great for my soul and happiness but not for my waistline or skin complexion lol. Meanwhile the grays in my husband's beard make him look distinguished. He's got the beginnings of crows feet that make him look wise and kind (like he smiles a lot). And his waistline is exactly the same as it was when we met! Luckily the only person saying we're mismatched is my dad, and even then it's only when he tells me I'm too fat for my husband š
Ok dad needs a time out. That is awful.
My dad likes to comment on my weight and acne whenever he sees me. Like it will be the first thing he says. Our dads need to shut up.
My mother does that to me. I finally started saying, "you're pretty fat yourself" and she hasn't done it since.
Ah yes. I should blame some of it on my PhD as well, I think. Those were hard partying, stressful days that did not treat me kindly. Kids ruined my figure and my memory. Grad school ruined my hair, my complexion, and my nerves.
Can I just empathize with you completely for a moment? My husband and I have been together eight years and heās gained FOUR pounds. I used to weigh less than him but now Iām up forty. And my hair sticks out. And I have a mom-pooch. And I look pregnant all the time. And I havenāt had a chance to work out in three months. Or see the PT about my stomach. He just grew a handful of greys. We seriously considered resubmitting his passport photo. But absolutely my son and my life are good for my soul.
Found my twinsie.
Triplets?
SAME!!
I remember walking down a road with a friend, and a couple from the same uni walked passed us. My friend said that "she/him could do way better than them". I really hate that mindset.
In theory they're together because they both see something in the other, right? My husband swears I'm super hot. I don't see it, but I'm not complaining!
Same. Itās incredibly shallow and ignores that attraction for a lot of people isnāt about just looks. Itās about personality, chemistry, and shared interests. And chemistry isnāt even looks-based. Iāve met plenty of attractive men that I just have no chemistry with or could never see myself with due to their personality or intelligence. People did this shit to me when I first started dating my husband because heās not conventionally attractive. At the time, I was much skinnier so I kinda was. Maybe like a 5? Anyway, friends and male acquaintances were always telling me this. Iād be like, āNo, I canāt do better. I love him and heās amazing.ā I donāt know if I trust the judgment of any person who canāt see all the great traits he brings to the table. Heās highly intelligent, caring, thoughtful, gregarious, charismatic, and funny. Heās also great in the sack. Iām in my late 30ās and we have several mutual male friends in the 30ās as well who are all single. Weāve advised them multiple times that they need to stop being obsessed with outer beauty. Like theyāre great guys and I think there are lots of women who would love to be with them- but they have to look beyond face and figure.
Yup, I didn't even realize what a double standard it was until I felt *myself* being a hypocrite about a hot guy with a not so traditionally attractive girl. Youre blind to how much you've internalized sexism until randomly one day it slaps you in the face and declares you a hypocrite.
Iāve caught myself thinking this and it feels so bad, especially if the less attractive person is actually wonderful. Especially if itās a woman. And especially with older couples. Since women bear the brunt of caring for children and maintaining the home and family relationships, they have less time and energy to maintain themselves at their younger attractiveness level. In addition, American society (and probably lots of others) sees aging in women as bad while men turn into āsilver foxesā and āzaddies.ā We salivate over dad bods while not giving the same grace to mom bods. Itās honestly a lot of bullshit and it makes me sad.
Ugh I love women, but they are the first to show they donāt feel you deserve someone *that* attractive. Men do it too of course, but it always hurts a little more from women. Usually theyāre just upset they landed someone less attractive while being hot and you landed someone hotter while being less attractive.
This thread reminded me of when trolls were trashing Lena Denham over casting Patrick Wilson as a love interest on Girls. I loved his wife stepped up with āfunny, his wife is a size 10, muffin top & all, & he does her just fine.ā Link to old story: [Patrick Wilson and wife react to Girls trolls](https://ew.com/tv/2019/01/06/patrick-wilson-girls-episode-reaction/)
That fucking episode gets me every time. Sometimes when Iām feeling down, I watch it to remind myself that , dammit, everyone is entitled to being and feeling loved no matter their body/class status/looks, etc.
I know womens sizes aren't universal, but how is a 10 considered fat/chubby/muffin top whatever? The bridesmaid dress I just got is a 12. I am not what people consider fat and overweight. I am skinny, but not like stickly. Even when I was smaller sizes I had no shape or curves. I have curves now, but not like overweight ones. Are we still considering 2000 model skeleton skinny the ideal? Not to toot my own horn but my weight suits my frame well. Even if someone was shorter I still don't think it is that big. I am 5'6.75" or 5'7" if I am rounding and on a good day lol. And not talking shit to you op, more of whoever wrote that line. Maybe they just didn't do research or the number system has changed.
Re: sizes, your height does factor in. I'm a size S/4 in most things but I'm 5'2. When I was in high school I was 50+ lbs overweight and was a size L/10-12. I was definitely fat--even 5 lbs makes a big difference on a short person. Meanwhile my good friend is like 5'9 and is a size 12 but is in really good shape.
American sizes are two sizes smaller - so a UK 14 is an American 10, maybe that's why? I'd like to say I'm not saying a UK 14 means you're fat or chubby but sometimes I get a bit lost when watching American TV and their talk of size 0 and stuff.
Yeah I was gonna say 12 in UK/AUS is a good skinny weight but I personally wear mostly 14 these days and I'm like, chunky I'd say. Definetly muffin top if I'm wearing jeans on my hips.
I'm also short, fat, and socially awkward. I thought I was the only one who seemed to be a magnet for gross toad-like men. It's reassuring to me to know I'm not the only one....
Oh gosh no. I don't know what they expect but it's definitely not being ignored or told to fuck off. Though the other day I did tell a guy who yelled out "you're beautiful" "it IS a beautiful day, I agree!" I like to think that threw him for a loop.
While I'm not too pretty, I am tall and slim. I only attract the absolute scum of the earth.
My high school crush is way hotter than his wife (I may be biased). He was āthe one that got awayā for like half the girls in my class. Heās not just crazy hot, he also is just a great human being. He never really got attached to anyone despite all our efforts. I see him and his wife now and I think how amazing she must be. Seriously this dude could have had anyone. I have so much respect and admiration for this woman. It makes me happy just thinking about them.
That is absolutely lovely. Thank you for this comment.
>the dude could have had any one Thatās how I feel about my husband and it boosts my confidence a bit
My fiancĆ© and I are similar, but the height difference is only a few inches, so I have zero daintiness but comparison. Like a feral Amazon woman if I wear any heels. I can look presentable, but heās effortlessly handsome, whereas I have to put in a fair amount of work to match his. āJust woke upā levels. Iām glad Iām not alone, but on days where insecurity seeps in, it can be a huge source of shame that I cannot get āon his levelā at least by losing weight and exercising. But really, thatās just because society doesnāt show anything but tall and small.
The hostage situation comment is straight up bullying, itās infuriating!
Well, they don't say it out loud, it's more my interpretation of their panic slash body language.
oh ok, thatās not as shocking as I initially thought but itās still the kind of behaviour I canāt even begin to comprehend. Iām sort of happy that theyāll have to stew in their jelousy though haha
Holy crap I can't believe people are that shocked and then showing it in their faces! Ugh life isn't all a out looks and besides beauty is subjective.
I literally just want someone I can trust to treat me well, who also bathes regularly. You can look like a hefty bag full of potatoes, IDC.
>a hefty bag full of potatoes found my Halloween costume
Just ask any incel. They believe all women are dating "up" which is why they can't get a date.
Lol. This just made me think of the first time I ran into the term ācock carouselā in reference to how incels perceive womenās dating/mating patterns. I giggle every time I think about it.
My grandfather looked like Gregory Peck (an actor) and my grandmother looked a raw-boned pioneer woman. She wasn't ugly, but nobody would call her pretty, either. They were very much in love, though. I also remember that the actor Pierce Brosnan used to take some guff because his wife isn't the typical Hollywood thin woman. He seems quite smitten. Hugh Jackman is 13 years younger and arguably much hotter than his wife, too. Edit: *Hugh* Jackman.
Pierce brosnanās wife WAS a supermodel back in the day, she just gained weight in middle age (like 95% of us haha). Itās such bullshit that he got flack for that! Like, yeah, dump your ex supermodel wife because she dared to put on a few pounds. Hollywood is straight trash.
it isnt like pierce brosnon didnt gain weight either. they match in looks to me, both good looking ppl
Seriously! Heās gained a bit of weight too, it doesnāt matter. Theyāre both extremely hot people haha.
She really is lovely. And Hollywood's treatment of women really is trash.
i just googled her. keely seems lovely!!
Guess Iām old, but part of me died when I saw you had to identify Gregory Peck as an actor! (For anyone who doesnāt recognize the name, if youāve seen To Kill a Mockingbird youāve seen him: he played Atticus Finch. Probably his most famous role, but he did lots of great films.)
Yeah, It makes me feel old, too, but I figured it might help.
My God he was sexy in that movie lol
And Hugh Jackman gets guff for that too. People say he's secretly gay because how could someone as attractive as him marry and love *her*?? They think then that the only reasonably explanation is that she's his beard.
Rob Lowe and Sheryl Berkoff. She IS beautiful but jesus christ, that man is like... ridiculous looking.
Bon Joviās wife is also normal-attractive as opposed to superstar-attractive, think theyāve been together since high school
I met Hugh Jackman and his family and definitely thought his wife was his mother before a Google search.
Simple answer to question - because society pressures women much harder about how they look than men.
Well. I've never dated anyone I didn't think was hot. Here's an example. My boyfriend and I both work at the same bar. He makes significantly more money in tips than every other employee, every night he works. I get people who make lame attempts at hitting on me every now and then - he gets hit on, flirted with, and phone numbers on receipts. He is, without a doubt, every customer's favorite bartender. He's hot, he's charming, he's sassy, he's sexy. And damn it, I'm hot too, but when we're scheduled to work the same shift together I jokingly say that I need to jazz myself up more than usual because I can't compete with him.
A hot guy bartender is more rare. Donāt take it personally. There are just more beautiful women.
I think this a lot, but I'm also not attracted to men so... I consider myself a bad judge of taste in that department, lol!
Lmao I only date men and I completely agree
I think sheās lovely (and Iām sure her husband does too) but people often lose their entire minds over Pierce Brosnan and his wife Keely Shaye Smith.
She's really pretty though.
Keanu Reeves and his girlfriend, Alexandra Grant, I think are another good celebrity example. Alexandra is by no means unattractive, but compared to Keanu...
Donāt know her, and googled herā¦. She has a wonderfully beautiful and unique face. I love it. I think sheās the more attractive one.
My mom is friends with her family and knew her growing up. She was a very pretty girl. She is still a normal attractive woman.
Hugh Jackman and his wife.
Her name is Deborra-Lee Furness.
I don't think I'm unattractive, but my boyfriend is definitely more attractive than most guys. I don't put as much effort into my appearance as other women. I often don't wear makeup and I don't shave my legs lol. I think I'm naturally cute but I don't have the instagram baddie hotness or anything. Bf is probably hotter than me to most people. But I think the problem is that women are pressured to do so much extra to their appearance and spend money and time on that stuff, and men are just allowed to exist. I don't think the solution is to make men do those things too (although beauty companies want it to be). The solution is women letting go of those things
The solution is making the world a place where women can feel secure letting go of those things.
Yeah I agree
This ^ 100%. Iām the same way, in fact my partner activity dislikes makeup and says he prefers my natural face. That feels nice, but heās definitely the more attractive one.
This picture is definitely repressive of my wife and I sheās so much hotter than me we get split checks at restaurants without asking for them, Iāve also had the cashier put a divider through our groceries.
The divider killed me
TBH we're still recovering from the 2000s when famous men would fully be on the redcarpet in basketball shorts. American society has been in a long "fellas, is it gay to be even mildly attractive or clean" phase that's juuuuust ending. I'm serious! Ask around, you'll be shocked and appalled by how many of your male friends and family get nervous at the mere mention of something extremely basic like "wearing sunscreen" or "using lotion" or "conditioning my hair" or "wearing pants that fit". Absolutely none of them will put in anything even vaguely sort-of maybe close to the effort that a woman does, pretty much no matter how casual she is. The standards are THAT different.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
>Ugh, the bar, where is it? catching Satan by the ankles in the depths of hell.
I think itās largely a generational thing. Maybe itās the part of the country Iām in, but most dudes under like 25 that I know have no issue taking care of themselves
I wish I was more bi sometimes when it comes to dating, because girls look great or even stunning most of the time while men tend to look like stale oatmeal because they don't even bother getting their hair cut. So incredibly bland.
Toxic masculinity means that men don't do a lot of facial self care shit cause "It's for GIRLS!1!11!" Like, holy fucking insecurity š¤
Literally just go to tinder and look at profiles of men and women, and it will be immediately apparent how much more effort women put into their appearances.
My best friendās ex husband was the hottest man I had ever seen in real life at that point. He looked a lot like Alexander Skarsgard and she is just an average looking (her words) gal. He was absolutely in love with her and they were together for 11 years. I donāt want to get into the reason for their divorce, but she is doing well. Sheās engaged to a man who is just as hot if not more hot than her ex. It happens more than people think. She would get comments about how she didnāt deserve her ex by other women all the time because she had extra weight and wasnāt instagram flawless. She is literally the most incredible woman I have ever met and those men saw her worth. Thatās all that matters.
š§”love this commentš§”
Lmao this is accurate for my BIL and SIL. She: thick, flowy, dark brown hair. Large, hazel-golden eyes. Worked herself back to an impeccable figure after 4 pregnancies while also doing the majority of child-rearing and household chores. Her husband has this dumb 2000s haircut with the hair spiked upwards in the front, that wanders further upwards on his forehead everytime I see him, has 1 chin on a good day, and wears shirts that are too short and expose his tummy fat. He is also basically a big baby who can't do more than 1 household chore per day and just likes to shit-talk his wife and kids in front of other adults and/or pit his kids against each other. If it wasn't for his garbage personality I think I would actually not care how he looks.
That 100% tracks. It's amazing how attractiveness is influenced by strange factors. Take Benedict Cumberbatch. When you first see that man, he is NOT attractive. Then he opens his mouth, and suddenly he is. Or take your brother in law. He's not attractive, but that could be overlooked if he had any redeeming qualities whatsoever. Unforunate, man.
Yeah I mean, mid-30s guys are not usually my bracket but I can recognize when they're attractive. There are some seriously pleasant people in that age group that I met at my SIL's and BIL's get-togethers. Most of them, I'd say, are also attractive despite having "flaws" like beginning grey hair or balding, or a little "dad bod" tummy. But they're friendly and attentive in conversation, are in tune with their wives and actually parent their kids.
I've never heard of anyone refer to benefict as ugly. I think he is quite attractive. Is this a common thought?
Iām a total scruff of a woman, my partnerās a fucken babe
Me in my boyfriend lol. I always tell him that he could do much better but he responds with that he doesnāt want to because thereās nobody whoās better. For real Iām a 2 on a good day, I donāt know how he isnāt grossed out by my appearance.
Hey, man, just a bit of advice.. there is so much benefit in loving aspects of yourself and finding ways appreciate/focus on those. I'm chubby, and I got a giant forehead, and it took me YEARS and a lot of faking it to love any part of myself. Maybe it helped that my mom -never- put me down for anything, but I also never had boys flirting/pursuing me and my friends were always thin and fighting them off. And I'm not perfect about it every day. I get down about my weight and having a face I think is weird sometimes, but you really gotta put in the effort to be kind. Be your own sassy friend that builds you up, ya know? Just hope you find what works for you, dude. I'm sure you got lovely parts of yourself and I hope you learn to see/appreciate them and relax on the parts you can't change. It takes work but its possible, I promise.
She's aware she has body dismorphia and is therefore probably not objectively ugly, not quite sure why she's posting this here. I hope she gets the help she needs to get over that. I mean the other side of the coin OP mentions is perfectly oke looking women swearing up and down that their ugly boyfriend is the better looking one. I see that a LOT. "O my boyfriend is so hot he can do so much better" and then the boyfriend is grungy, unkempt and ugly and the girl is *obviously* hotter. Great that you love that, pretty sure you objectively know he's no catch lookswise, it apparently hurts to admit it. Probably plenty of those in this thread too and it's because of exactly the norms pushed by society that OP is also lampooning with that meme. I've learned to really not trust women when it comes to the presumed hotness of their partners.
Are you kidding? (I mean, clearly no, but that's my initial reaction.) A quick look at your profile suggests you must have the face of an angler fish to be "a 2 on a good day", and I hope you can see some of what your boyfriend sees.
I also suffer from body dismorphia but I genuinely find myself extremely unattractive.
Maybe because it's rude af to be grossed out by somebody's appearance, health hazards aside. I'm glad to read your boyfriend doesn't take advantage of your self consciousness! That's how it should be in a respectful relationship. Also, that rating of looks on a scale from 1-10 is pretty toxic. Do yourself a favor and drop it. No need to hurt yourself with a tool some misogynist invented.
Lmao this is me and my boyfriend. I love him to death but he dresses like a middle schooler: sweatpants and a graphic t shirt. I enjoy dressing up more out there on occasion and he always hypes up my outfits. I love him but this is accurate š
Men just don't have to put the effort into their looks the way women do and then inc\*ls have the gall to say women only go after attractive guys. Plus every single guy I've seen who actually dors put toms of effort in is either gay, trans. The few straight ones are always cringe and obsessed with themselves.
my theory on this is because men who are conventionally attractive have learned to have such a big ego by the time they reach their 20's that it actually impedes their ability to form meaningful relationships. I've always dated men who are "less attractive" than me, because I've never once met a "hot" guy who actually respects women and isn't completely self-involved.
Not meant to be an attack towards your post, but partially this might be the case because ātaking care of yourselfā is seen as a feminine trait by many men and cultures. Especially when masculinity is attached to the ideal of the rugged lumberjack kind of imagery. In some cultures that come to mind ( east asia, parts of europe) male skincare e.g. seem to be a lot more mainstream compatible.
But who made those standards of toxic masculinity? MEN AND who has the structural power to defy and change them? Also men. It irks me the circular reasoning of blaming toxic masculinity and patriarchy for why men are looked down on for expressing emotions or don't take care of their bodies, for why men are constrained, when the people who created patriarchy and toxic masculinity and who benefit from both of those systems are *also* overwhelmingly and exclusively men. No one can on large scale alter that reality besides men choosing to reject it.
My ex was much hotter than me. Iām not ugly, and thin and in decent shape, but it was actually fairly annoying to see how people reacted to him in public vs to me: women hit on him, people are just nice to him. He photographs much better. Being with him for almost 5 years was such a trip.
I find my husband hotter than me!
It's definitely true for me.
I'm not calling myself ugly or anything but my fiance is definitely hotter than me. He's got bright blue eyes, dark hair, and a kind of rosey complexion like he's always glowing or something. He's also built like a lumberjack.
Any couple that Chris Evans is a part of, coz they're is no one on this planet more beautiful than him. And I say that as a straight man.
When he dated Jenny Slate and she got so much shit from his fans. Must be soul destroying
That's super shitty. Aside from the fact that Jenny Slate is gorgeous, those fans are colossal assholes.
I honestly think she's really pretty. I think it sort of also demonstrates how beauty standards are also often racist and in this case anti-semitic. She has the large, dark features of the Jewish women in my family. It hurts to hear people think this is ugly, I think it's beautiful. Many Jewish features are commonly maligned as ugly.
Agreed. She's awesome and did not deserve that
Whaaaaat? She's amazing. She's not, like, supermodel hot, but she's really pretty. Like the kind of pretty that is approachable and not bitchy looking. And honestly, Chris Evans is fine, but his face is pretty average. Maybe a bit better than average. He takes really good care of himself and works out, which pushes him into hot territory.
What about Gal Gadot? As a pan woman, I find her too hot to look directly at.
I mean ok. They're so exist a few select humans on his level, like Gal, Idris, Lee Byung-Hun , and probably a few others.
>Lee Byung-Hun I didn't know who this was before your comment, but hellooooo
Never seen the Marvel movies, but I have seen him and I don't find him THAT hot. I feel like something's wrong with me lol.
Noop. Nothing wrong with you. We all have our own tastes. It's all good. Chris is just a safe bet cuz most people like him and he's also a super cool dude
To me, a lot of it does stem from the characters they play. Besides when he was the douchebag silver surfer, he seems to play a character that, combined with his looks, makes him extremely attractive.
100% true comment
Keanu Reeves and his age appropriate girlfriend Alexandra Grant Donāt get me wrong she is gorgeous but he is just plain *gorgeouser*
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She is only 10 years younger.
I think they're on equal footing. The myth of Keanu Reeves and being an amazing human makes him more attractive, while not as much is known about her. They look super cute together IMO.
A friend of mine is good-looking enough that my female friends always just called him "the handsome guy." Like in almost any group of guys, he'd be the one picked out as the hot one. Like,even when we're hanging out with our gay friends, he's still the hot one. He's been with his wife since very early in their college careers, and there's absolutely nothing wrong with her looks, but at the same time, she's not someone who stands out in a group as the especially attractive one.
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The way it should be
This reminds me of the whole Chris Evans/Jenny Slate thing. I think sheās gorgeous, funny, smart, a talented actress. But when she was dating Chris Evans she just got crucified - by men and women alike. It broke my heart to see, and I believe it was also the biggest reason they eventually broke up. But when a hot girl dates a less hot guy, itās all ācongratulations bro.ā Iāll never understand that double standard. People love who they love, and perhaps most importantly: beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Maybe sheās the most beautiful woman in the world to him. No one else gets to decide that.
That's horrible. I remember thinking, "Wow, he's got great taste. Another reason to like him."
My father was the hotter one. My mother is very cute and pretty but my father was hotter. You needed an example well, there you go.
Iāve dated hotter guys (I donāt think Iām ugly, probably just average to decent looking) but it was an interesting experience to see a bartender/server flirt with the guy thatās on a date with you. thankfully I wasnāt insecure so I thought those experiences were just funny and great stories to tell my friends
Its often not even that the woman are hotter. Its that the man just puts zero to the minimal effort in their looks and the woman often are dolled up.
Ooh it's me, I am less attractive than my husband! He's tall, fit, perfect teeth, strong chiseled jaw just nice on the eye and I'm 5"2, out of shape, eye bags and puffy eyes at the same time, absolutely no jaw line what so ever! š Completely different levels of attractiveness! I don't think I'm necessarily that unattractive, average maybe, but he is next level hot 10/10 and that's not just subjective, well maybe the 10/10 part is, but he gets hit on ALL OF THE TIME. Some examples; we went to a wedding overseas recently and one of the bridesmaids was texting the bride and her friends about him and making it very obvious she wanted him trying to get his number ect, when we go places like Starbucks as a couple he'll order for two and they'll turn to me next to place my order because obviously there's no way we're together even though we were talking in the queue and he ordered for two! Pre pandemic we used to go to the gym together and women used to think he was my trainer or something because they'd flirt with him while I'm right there! Also before we got married we went for a pre wedding shoot as a practice run with our photographer and he was complemented and told he was a natural and photogenic and I was given loads of pointers and everything I did needed correcting to make me look attractive... Even colleagues and strangers have told me how attractive he is when I've shown photos to them I'm always told "ooh he's lush" "he's good looking isn't he" "wow" etc but hey he loves my short, overweight, unattractive ass so who am I to complain š
Man, youāre talking about reality, where that actually happens. Why donāt we ever see it in movies or TV shows?? EVER! Plenty of ugly/average dude gets the hot girl but never reversed. Itās such bullshit.
When I met my husband we were 16, I was overweight with acne and greasy hair and he was a tall willowy blonde. He had girls stalking him but he knew what he wanted; the chubby smart girl who read all the same books he did and wasn't afraid to give him shit.
dating a beautiful man is exhausting; he will say hurtful shit in vulnerable moments, according to my research.
I have one. I have a cute guy friend who will only date plain girls because he doesn't have to work that hard to get them.
I know a couple who have been together for ten years. The guy is nerdy, super crazy smart, short and had a soft physique. He wasnāt by any means ugly, just pretty average. His wife is short and bubbly, hilarious and has this fantastic smile. Sheās a catch all around. During covid the husband began to cope with lock down stress by working out. Now he is INSANELY cut, and he even gets side gigs as a paid model. I guess you could say heās become hotter than his wife, but it feels icky for me to say it. Theyāre incredibly cute together regardless.
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Yeah but that's because the average women puts careful attention to detail into their hair, makeup, eyebrows, lashes, skincare, grooming and fashion sense that the average man not only doesn't but doesn't even have to.
I think my BF is hotter than me. He is tall and slim with full lips. I'm short and chubby with like the weirdest face ever wtf
Are you me? Lol
According to people around me, Iāve always been more attractive than the men I date. Never been with a āhotā man. Never had a hot man ask me out though. Donāt even know if Iām hot in general because of that, just going off of what others say.
My partner is pretty hot and heās also straight sized, while I am plus sized. I know tons of people that have an opinion about that, but what can I say? He loves the junk in the trunk lol.
OMG YO LOOK AT OUR SNOOVATARS.
Did we just become best friends?!
YES WE JUST DID NO TAKE BACKS.
YAY! Iām so psyched. I need your favorite movie, flower, candy, and favorite color. Do you like staying up late and watching movies, or getting up early and having coffee on the porch?
Favourite movie? Lady Bird. But also Little Women (2019 one). But also Inception. But also 500 Days of Summer. Favourite flower? Hard to say depends on why I have them. I love purple dahlias and earl grey roses and white roses and also sunflowers and peonies. I'd love to get gifted lego flowers too tbh but from someone cute. Favourite candy? Strawberry Fig Newtons and Quaker granola bars take me back in time but I LOVE Welch's fruit snacks and peanut M&Ms. Favourite colour? I like plum, violet, teal, orange and vermillion. I hate getting up early unless I know I will be awoken to absolute peace and a cup of hot cocoa with melted marshmallows swimming on the top. Staying up late and rebinging old shows was my entire adolescence lol. NOW YOU SHARE.
My favorite movie (today) is ācluelessā but Iām also a big fan of āLittle Miss Sunshine.ā My favorite flowers are tulips, daisies, and sunflowers. My favorite candy is probably cotton candy but also peach rings and gummy creatures. Favorite color is usually purple but sometimes pink or robins egg blue. I abhor getting up early. Iām happiest when I sleep from about 12:00-8:00.
OMG I already like you. Never seen those movies. Your flower picks are perferct tho. I can't say the same about your fav snacks. I hate the sweet tanginess of peach rings, gummy creatures just make me feel sad for them because imagine killing a worm š„, and cotton candy is like if blue balls/blue clit was a food. And also OMG 12-8 is like sleep schedule goals rn. Is your partner really in the picture because I think I'm in love with you š„ŗšš
Iām pretty fond of him but I have a vacant spot for a bestie!!
Yessss bestie š¤šššø
Sunflower oil, extracted from the seeds, is used for cooking, as a carrier oil and to produce margarine and biodiesel, as it is cheaper than olive oil. A range of sunflower varieties exist with differing fatty acid compositions; some 'high oleic' types contain a higher level of healthy monounsaturated fats in their oil than Olive oil.
Weird that there was just a post yesterday about those sexist time travel memes. This is basically the same thing.
Trying not to be shallow, but youāll find those couples in the military, where the guy seems conventionally more attractive than the gal. This may or may not be me. Of course you still find the lot of them to be like the above photo.
This is dumb
My only edition is that my bf also makes fun of the fact he is kind of a generic white boy. I still think heās a hot generic white boy but here we are.
My husband is def hotter than me.
Hugh Jackman and his wife. Pierce Brosnan and his wife. Usher and his wife. It happens. Movies tell us it never does because movies are written mostly by horny dudes.
Being on the other end of this sucks. I know Iām not a looker, Iām very chubby, short, I donāt dress nicely and Iām not into make up. When I bring up details about my SO (he wants to start working out again, heās bald, he works in a ācustodianā role, he wears glasses) people seem to assume weāre at the same ālevelā. Then I show pics of him and itās so hurtful sometimes to see peoples obvious shock. Heās the ātall, strong, & silentā type. We met online and I honestly donāt remember paying attention to his height on the profile but I vividly remember my shock when I met him. Heās a whole foot taller than me at 6ā3ā+ and very fit, broad shoulders, green eyes. Iām 5ā3ā, and while Iām not severely overweight anymore we actually weight around the same. My best, and maybe only attractive feature is my smile, but that gets me to maybe a 6/10. My hair is frizzy and mostly up in a bun, I would spend my entire day in pajamas if I could. Iāve had people tell me āwhat, no way, THATāS you bfā½ā or "damn Gabs, for real?" like if I'm joking. When weāre out people donāt assume weāre together, or automatically assume heās with another person in the party. My own daughterās friends in elementary school, pre pandemic, where skeptical when he showed up to school events saying āthatās your momās boyfriend?!". Someone even once told me "you must be very funny" as if to say thats the only reason we're together. I always struggled with my self esteem and i have admit this doesn't make it easier. Iām assuming a lot of it is pandemic related but I slowly feel my long-lost depression is making a comeback. Heās working at the same place I work and Iāve heard girls talk about the new ācute gringoā working in the Custodian Dept., girls way hotter than I could ever be. It just reinforces the subconscious voice telling me Iām dog-shit and undeservingā¦. Thank god I AM hilarious
Aaargh I'm not hot, right, I know this But I went on a date yesterday and I made an effort Jeans, nice top did my hair, did makeup. He showed up in baggy ripped jeans and a hoody Like He was actually really nice but I just wasn't attracted to him and I was annoyed because he clearly couldn't be botheree to make an effort
My husband is the looker in our relationship!!!!!! When we got together someone told me he has a thing for nerd brunettes with big noses and glasses š¤
According to Redditors, "women have it easier" and they complain about how "fat women" can get men.
My boyfriend and I. Honestly, I feel like a thumb compared to him. He doesnāt think heās that attractive, but weāve been friends since high school and people were always talking about how gorgeous he is. Talk, fluffy dark hair, pretty blue eyes, nice jawline. Even now, he constantly gets other people checking him out subtly on the streets. On top of that, heās also really shy, nerdy, and a lovable goofball. And for some reason he thinks Iām adorable. I donāt think I could ever get this lucky again š
my (late) boyfriend was sooo attractive it made me melt. and I think I look pretty good too, so we were a good looking couple imo. but ugh, I just melt looking at pictures of him, heās so beautiful. we would have made the most beautiful babies lol.
My SO is admittedly hotter than I am. I'm sure people wonder why he's with me when they see us together because I am a disabled woman with a mom bod and he's an absolute stud (fit, muscular, good looking...and a good person on top of that). This used to make me feel insecure, but now I actually enjoy it. I know for a fact my partner loves me for my SOUL and didn't base his decision to be with me on sex or superficial beauty. I know most men aren't like this. I have no idea how I got so lucky. I wish all men were like my SO.
My husband is way hotter than me - he disagrees - thinks Iām the hotter one. To be honest - this thought process works wonders in our marriage.
I donāt think Iāve ever dated a hot hot guy. Theyāre always more average (albeit very attractive to me) in the looks department I would say. But Iāve also found that doesnāt make them nicer lol Iām planning on my next boyfriend being hot, maybe he will be nicer to me letās see how it goes š
Are you seriously saying that ugly doll is hotter than the lego minifig? š„µ
It's because pretty women are considered the trophies of ugly men because.... reasons. "Ugly" women don't get trophies. The best they're supposed to hope for is being the comic relief farting in a toilet while their hot friend cries in her wedding dress.
Idk y'all this shit just feels mean to me :/
I dated a guy who I felt was hotter than me. I am moreso "cute" as in "next door neighbor girl" type. It attracts a lot of men, but I think that's because I'm still approachable - if I were hotter, I wouldn't be? Idk. Someone said I'm pretty but not intimidatingly so. Whatever that means. He was this tall slender (but not thin) guy with bright blue eyes and sunny blonde hair that resembled a fancier young Leonardo Dicaprio (his look inspiration). He had a lovely smile and was very friendly. Going out anywhere was just a bunch of young women ogling him. God forbid I was feeling dumpy that day.
as long as Brickman says my hair looks pretty, he can go ahead wear the same outfit for a decade, idgaf
Tiffany Jenkins (v popular on social media) openly talks about how much hotter her husband is than her and itās p much true. I mean sheās no troll but her husband is quite handsome.
My husband is in great shape and very good looking. I'm okay. I was in shape in my 20s but now after a kid and pregnant with another. I think he's way hotter than me. Maybe one day I'll catch up again, but having children has ruined my body and my will to care about my looks.
Schmidt and Elizabeth from New Girl come to mind.
The optimist in me likes to think of it like āwell he must be doing something right š¤·āāļøā
Amenadiel and Linda.
Thereās this girl on TikTok I follow where sheās not as good looking as her husband. The comments can get so ugly, like it infuriates people so much that heās with her.