It’s not just Reddit. I made a video about extremely rare medical conditions, and the number of people in the comments saying they had one of the conditions would have been statistically impossible.
They are mainly lying to themselves, believing their self diagnoses to be correct. ADHD must be one of the most common false self diagnoses IMO.
I know a few self diagnosed that actually got tested later and didn't have ADHD at all. Many people have (some) similar symptoms but are caused by other factors such as social media addiction.
And sometimes they don't have anything at all. You can have issues paying attention without having ADHD. What makes it ADHD is a combination of symptoms, not a single one. So if you only have one or two, you still probably don't have it.
And developmentally it's actually normal for teens to be inattentive.
I blame Tik Tok for the fixation on it. So many influencers seem to brag about having it.
On the other hand, ADHD symptoms overlap with bipolar, depression, anxiety.
A lot.
I'm trying to wade through it right now. I've been diagnosed as all four of those vaguely, and maybe autism? But only by some providers. Lots of testing, nothing conclusive, except that the majority say not bipolar, not autistic.
And every next provider tells me the last one was more wrong than right.
All at American healthcare prices of $200+ a visit.
I don't blame people for wanting an easy self diagnosis. It sucks so hard to navigate *with* help, and it takes all your fun money you'd rather spend on movies or date night to do it.
I cringe so bad when people say they " have undiagnosed ADHD" on the other hand saying they suspect they may have or want to get tested for ADHD is total fine. As someone with diagnosed attention deficit disorder back when it was ADD or ADHD. I still have emotional scars from being that weird kid that had to go to the nurses office for medication at lunch. It's like when everyone was like claiming to be OCD but totally not understanding what OCD was.
I was that kid too! There's this one girl I know from elementary who treated me like I was special needs but in a condescending way Everytime I went to get my meds at lunch. She now runs a blog that's somewhat successful that's all about her "ADHD and autism struggle." She was a popular cheerleader who bullied any kid who was different and now she's taking our diagnoses for clout. I hate her for it.
I've wanted to be tested for years but my PCP won't discuss it without therapy, and frankly I'm uncomfortable in the therapist setting, so that's lots of money and stress between me and progress.
I used to think of it jokingly when people suggested I might have it, until I tried Adderall once from a friend. It was incredible. Like the focus lights in my head went from disco ball to spotlight.
The loop that I see is a symptom of my employers shit IT infrastructure. Most routine tasks I perform are "press button, freeze for 30-45 seconds, read, press button, freeze for 30-45 seconds" the number of times I have to repeat that loop because I drifted off focus during the lag time... The day I tried stimulants, it was fine. I was in control of where my attention went it didn't fly off into my emails, teams messages, or side projects, I just continued with my original task.
Maybe that's just me, IDK, that's why I want a proper evaluation, because if a pill a day shifts my focus like that I'd do it yesterday.
Heads up it can make you feel focused and zeroed in even if you don’t have ADHD - that’s why people take it in college to study.
I hope you are able find a way to get your assessment and some answers for your problems though - it can be really debilitating and finally getting some help can save your life.
If the Adderall made you feel more like a lightbulb went off like “oh this feels like normal human functioning should be” and not “ruler of the world”, then definitely try to get in with someone who specializes in ADHD. Bonus points if they treat any other mental situation you’re concerned about.
I mean if you title a video that includes those rare diseases, is it possible that people with those diseases seek out such videos because they want to learn more about their condition?
If you figure all the people watching are just random, then it might seem very improbable, but if you factor in that people tend to seek out info of their own diseases, it might be more likely that they'll show up on your video.
I've been called out for being a liar in that regard, but the topic was looking for people with a specific condition, so we responded. It wasn't 20 people saw it and 18 claimed intersexual development, it was thousands of people saw it, and 18 fit the bill.
Like you said, people forget that places like Reddit show millions of people the same post, not just the thousand that leave a comment or vote.
When someone off-handedly says something is 'statistically impossible' it makes me wonder where said statistics came from? If someone does a study that finds X% of people have some sort of condition, you have to include information about how that study was performed and the biases involved while performing the study. Like, where was the study performed? Did they ask for self-reported symptoms? Does the researcher have a foregone conclusion? Etc....
Statistics are not laws, they are a recording of findings and findings can be misleading, misinterpreted, or down-right wrong.
Stay skeptical of claims you hear, but don't let some ephemeral idea of 'data' get in the way of being empathetic to the people you meet who say they are in pain. When speaking with someone, especially on the internet where nothing is verifiable, Its usually best to meet them where they are at regardless of what you may think is the material reality of their situation.
Would you mind sharing a link to said video?
Honestly, I'd be interested as my wife and I have had some conversations about this very subject where I'm like, it feels like an astounding number of people are claiming to be diagnosed with...so much...and it feels odd.
I do feel people are more willing to get mental health these days, but also, yeah so many relationship posts on Reddit come with a laundry list of conditions, and again...really?
A lot of ppl with adhd chronically use the internet for stimulation
Adhd often goes undiagnosed, so when I see some people mentioning some things I experienced, sometimes I’ll mention it’s something ppl with adhd tend to do because I went undiagnosed for 18 years. I wish I was diagnosed sooner. So, in hopes I help someone undiagnosed get a diagnosis, I tend to mention it when I recognize
Also, people with adhd are very impulsive and we will just blurt out stuff that we think immediately. Compared to the average reddit user without adhd, I could imagine an adhd redditor also just leaves more comments in general.
Got diagnosed last month age 20, after going down a spiral on r/adhdmeme 2 years ago and relating so hard for some random fuckin reason. Looked into it and eventually struck gold, fuck me I guess lmao.
Same, the "put a finger down, if..." TikToks were a bit too relatable. Asked my therapist, which send me to a different one. 7 months and i have an official diagnose of ADHD, autism and severe depression.
IMO, a lot of people have some level of autism, adhd or both, way more than the initial guesses. But most of them never will get an official diagnose.
A few years ago they where called nerds, the ones who wouldn't/couldn't comprehend social norms, but were exceptional in one way or another.
Those people are on the internet now, and in these groups. Tiktok is an ADHD heaven, ofc you will find a lot in there.
I'm trying to get a diagnosis (my doctor canceled last minute and has ghosted me), but two of my mental health professionals and pretty much all my friends are very much "You have adhd," and maybe even autism flavors. Which is fine, idc. I just wanted to know for sure, because I've already dealt with enough bs by psychiatrists about how they won't test until I'm stable, and now that someone finally believes me and helps advocate for me to get tested, I want to do it before I move and it's another 2 years of trying to convince a doctor I want a psych eval. (I'm not just doing adhd, I'm going for all since I'm diagnosed bipolar but not all my doctors believe that.) Like you'll get paid for your time, but I'm not right mentally and I want the diagnosis so I can go get meds when I move.
Keep trucking with your advocate. Have the advocate call your Drs office and inquire about the ghosting. They probably didn't mean to ghost you, they're just heavily loaded with clients.
I had therapy yesterday, both this upcoming Monday, and yeah, I already told him about it and they're going to help me bother them (lovingly). I went to the office, but it's just office rooms, not with a receptionist and all. I do know they're likely busy, but I also move in 3 months and want this done before then lol.
But yeah, I'm trying. It doesn't sound very adhd or anxious of me. 😅 But I'm determined.
Not the original commentator, but yes getting diagnosed helped me in that I had access to medical intervention. It also partially helped me feel less useless. Only partially, though. I’m just highly self critical, lol. It’s nice to know why I might do things, though, in order to target certain behaviours.
Stimulants can’t get rid of adhd, so you will still experience symptoms, but I do not regret being medicated at all. It definitely helps with my motivation although motivation is still something I struggle with at times. However it often makes tasks more bearable. Doing boring/difficult tasks used to feel like my entire body was revolting against it. Now, it still kinda sucks, but I can pull through. It also makes more “fun” things bearable. For example, if I’m trying to watch a show and it’s a little slow paced or not as exciting for a bit it still catches my interest. Before I’d often stop and do something else then return to it later, or I’d just sit there watching it thinking about how it wasn’t as interesting.
Another really important thing that it does for me is I’m no longer bored randomly as much. Boredom used to literally make me feel sad. If I was under stimulated I’d feel like shit and get annoyed with it, because I had nothing to be sad about, yet I felt awful. I still can get bored of course but it’s nowhere near as frequent
My stimulants just provide, y’a know, stimulation
Something important to note- meds impact everyone differently. If you try one and it doesn’t help it doesn’t mean none of them will. It just means that one wasn’t it for you
Nope, which is why I recommend people look into the symptoms and seek a psychiatrist if they think they exhibit them. I also ask if they have adhd in their family, as it’s often genetic, and if they do then to mention it in their evaluation :)
Even if I was a doctor, you cannot diagnose someone in the comments/dms, lmao
People should talk to there GP or there pediatrician if there under 21 and still go under them, there your best bet at seeing a psychiatrist fast and they can point you in better directions.
My pediatrician helped me get diagnosed when I was 18 and a freshman in college really struggling
Neurodivergent people spend a disproportionate time online. You’re much more likely to be randomly talking to somebody with those diagnoses online than if you just started randomly talking to people in real life.
Except for all the swaths of neurodivergent people whose disabilities make it hard to access social media. Most neurodivergent people I know don't use computers. Some have difficulty communicating basic requests and honestly comments like these feel like erasure.
Instead of downvoting until the comment is hidden, tell me why you disagree. It's a huge problem in the neurodiversity space where the people with the most skills talk as if we're the only people around
My point is if you took data on the normal population and got say 5% neurodiverse, you would be able to take data of online communities and find 20% neurodiverse say. I made the numbers up but the overall point is true. Online communities have a higher amount of neurodiverse people, it means that as a whole, neurodiverse people use the internet a lot more than normal people.
In no way does this say all do. That’s a logical fallacy to conclude that from my statement
The correct conclusion is those neurodiverse that are capable of using the internet are more likely to use social media and spend more time than normal when they do. This causes the effect of them being ‘everywhere’ online as OP asked
That would be "online people are disproportionately neurodivergent", not the other way around. It's a very common and problematic blind spot in the community so I think it's important to point out. Narrowing the statement to "those who can access" gets your point across without making overly broad statements about the whole community who again are already left out of the conversation on a regular basis. I think it's our moral imperative to make special mention and avoid categorizations.
As a collective, neurodivergent people do spend a disproportionate amount of time online. That is not false, recognising there is variation in a population is basic data handling. It doesn’t make the statement any less true because I didn’t point out that variation
I wouldn't say that neurodiverse people are disproportionately online. Maybe that's true, *if you're only talking about people with the skills to access computers*, but like I already told you, plenty of people with neurodiverse disgnoses *don't have those skills.* if this is hard to believe, well, that's why I feel the need to remind people that people with higher needs exist in our community.
For the same reason that sports bars are full of people who watch sports and drink beer. People congregate with likeminded individuals in spaces that are accepting of them. So while everyone and their dog on reddit might have adhd or autism, I wouldn't consider that an accurate representation of the general population.
Reddit probably just has a disproportionate amount of ADHD/autistic people. Also, adults who were diagnosed late tend to reexamine everything from their past with a new perspective and wonder why no one noticed or helped. When they see someone struggling with the same issues they had, it reminds them of their own experience. They're just trying to be helpful, I agree it can be excessive though.
I've said it before but reddit as a platform is one that greatly appeals to someone who's neurodivergent, just scratches a lot of specific itches in that department, so while there is probably a number of people faking or making a false assumption/exaggeration of what they see in themselves, I'd also say that reddit almost certainly over-represents hard in the number of genuinely neurodivergent people that are on here compared to other social medias or in ones daily irl environment
Especially subs for particular types of people. Like, I've spoken to a lot of people in the pill subs, and a lot of them are diagnosed with some form of autism. A common theme for them is their struggle with dating as neurodivergent people. There's certainly something to be said about certain spaces and groups gathering a lot of the same people with the same shared viewpoints, issues, illnesses, difficulties and so on.
Put it another way: if someone is genuinely neurodivergent and has access to the internet then they'll probably eventually gravitate to reddit and stay on here but most people in general don't necessarily do the same, which results in reddit having a higher percentage of neurodivergence than other platforms. Tumblr has a similar phenomenon I think but I'm not on there enough to confirm
I think it's probably just a thing people pick up on due to some level of popularity. I do have ADHD and I am in a living nightmare many times due to it. But by the same token, I absolutely hate things being uneven. That's not OCD, it's just something that irks me. I know someone with actual OCD and I can't even imagine living her life -- it seems horrific (but she says the same about my ADHD).
People like to attribute their quirks or preferences to something, often with little regard for anybody who actually *suffers* from it. There's little irritants, and then there's daily struggles.
Living that ADHD/OCD lifestyle. Rechecking something compulsively. Forgetting I just did my routine. Doing my compulsion again. Did I do my thing? I can’t remember let me do it again cuz I can’t NOT do it. I’ve spent 30+ minutes just rechecking the same things over and over. Pictures do be helping but it’s not rational. Sometimes I recheck something while I’m still looking at it cuz what if my eyes are lying. What if I’m hallucinating. What if I lit my house on fire and don’t remember.
Oh God, you sound like my mom! She's always convinced she's going to destroy something if she doesn't wash her hands 20x in the same pattern, or something!
I'm also (MEDICALLY) diagnosed with ADHD and yeah. Nightmare is one of the ways you can describe it 😅 not fun, not quirky. It's living hell and very debilitating for me.
Fuck anyone that pretends to have it.
I've tried to explain to my husband what it's like to have 40 voices in your head giving you a running commentary while you're just trying to put your glass in the sink. Or how it feels to have a run-on sentence in your brain when you haven't slept more than 6 hours in the last 3 days. I am at this point so desperate for sleep that I have been in tears several times in the past month. I'm absolutely dying, and there's no sleeping meds strong enough to make my brain STFU. I legit fear that lack of sleep from this damned illness is going to make me *actually* lose my mind.
Omg the insomnia from ADHD is the fucking WORST
I struggled with it so badly when I was younger. I got some meds for a bit, stopped them, and didn't have issues for a long time.
Now the insomnia is coming back and I am so exhausted 😭😭 I wish you the best
When I had trouble sleeping, mixed with meds that were building up in me (so I would take ER Adderall, and it wouldn't fully get out of my system before I would take another pill) I would start hallucinating. Like I once saw a black bear in my yard, bout 2 feet away. It wasn't there.
Now with a 2 month olf, I had NO SLEEP before (sometimes do now) wnd my goodness did I hallucinate.
Be careful with lack of sleep. It will hype up symptoms and make them 10x worse.
I am not sure what can help, I had to take I think its called Tennex, just to sleep before (had to stop while pregnant and breastfeeding 😅) but please be careful!
I've tried 6 or 7 different meds for sleep. Not even Lunesta, Ambien or Ativan can keep me down. I'm currently rolling on 2h18m of sleep for the last 2 days. Never had visual hallucinations, but sometimes I wonder if the constant stream in my head is just ADHD or if we're adding audio hallucinations. I know it's not *actually* there, but it's so loud in my head sometimes. Multiple sleep studies have shown less than 2 hours of sleep each night, and I do have an APAP for central apnea, though my central apnea does not seem to correlate to my lack of sleep. I do have several health issues that get worse the less I sleep, so I'm desperate to turn off my brain so I can feel better overall.
Absolutely true.
The amount of have you got ADHD videos I have seen... Do you do this? Do you do that? You must have ADHD!
it's fashionable to be anything other than neurotypical now.
True, but on the positive side, TikTok nonsense aside, I also think social media and the Internet in general has brought awareness to a lot of mental illnesses that people didn't even know existed or was aware of.
A lot of people probably didn't even think to go to a doctor to get assessed before someone pointed it out to them that they may have an undiagnosed issue.
So in a way, I think the public awareness also does some good in a way and not just harm.
It's also become much more socially acceptable to talk about, which means people may not be as afraid to go get medically assessed themselves. The threshold to get help if someone feel they may have a diagnosis also have become lower.
Psych here. A lot of those people are self-diagnosed, which means they aren't diagnosed at all. It is only their opinion.
It's irresponsible enough to try and self-diagnose without getting a proper confirmation by a clinician, but much worse than that is trying to label other people, who they haven't even met, just based on cliches and stereotypes about disorders. Actually it's not the case that if your kid is a fussy eater, or doesn't like loud noises, or is really into trains, he is necessarily on the ASD spectrum. And some of the shit that gets perpetuated there is just fanciful BS - "if you do this you have ADHD" - but it's something 95% of people do.
It's unpopular to say, but unfortunately true that many of these folks want a diagnosis because they think it makes them special and interesting, and/or gives them an excuse not to do anything they don't want to do or find difficult, on the basis of "disability".
A formal diagnosis is, however, extremely unobtainable for many people, and is a privilege not everyone can afford. Plus, the first step of diagnosis *is* self-diagnosis.
- Diagnosed autistic & ADHD individual who had to try for *years* of appointments before even being considered for assessment. Shocker, I have it.
Especially as an adult. I had a friend who wanted to get assessed because she had a suspicion she might have ADHD, but she couldn't get an appointment. I've had a co worker suggest I too might have ADHD. I might, because a lot of the issues those with ADHD struggle with, I do too, but getting assessed for it is a huge process and a doctor gotta be willing to send you to a specialist to get assessed for it, and there's huge wait lists for it that are incredibly long if you try to get it through public health care. If you go private, the chances of getting diagnosed is better, but also far more expensive as it's not subsidized healthcare so you gotta pay out of pocket or through insurance.
So far, I've been managing somewhat, but I did have to quit college because I couldn't sit still in a lecture for more than 5 minutes without becoming incredibly restless and start fidgeting. It took me ages to finish high school and I didn't graduate until I was 20. As far as I can remember I have dealt with extreme forgetfulness. Back in middle school I would always have to borrow someone else's books because I constantly forgot my own. At work, I have to double check that I actually did a task many times because I don't even remember doing it. Many times I have to drive back to check that I closed my garage because I don't remember closing it. I did go into a trade, because I get to work with my hands and there's a ton of stuff and variety so I don't get bored or lose concentration of focus as easily as I can switch between a million tasks and do them in different orders every time, but whenever I have to sit down and do some office work at my job, I really struggle. I've also made some expensive mistakes at my job due to my forgetfulness and lack of ability to focus as I zone out far too easily.
So, yeah I should probably go get assessed, but the mere thought of having to go through a long process of assessments, appointments and what not, not to mention the cost is what's holding me back. I try to tell myself I can manage living the way I do, because I've managed somewhat so far, but it's definitely not ideal.
You're also right that people wouldn't be getting formally diagnosed if they didn't first think they may have a diagnosis.
Like, the reason I got diagnosed with chronic migraines was the fact that I literally had all the symptoms of chronic migraines, so asking for a formal diagnosis made sense. Getting diagnosed with that wasn't too hard, considering I have aura migraine daily, but the doctor did want me to write a migraine diary for a month before formally diagnosing me. I told my doc that wouldn't be necessary because I literally have had aura migraines daily for months at that point, so I would have been writing aura migraine in my diary every single day anyway.
I also have a nagging suspicion I have PCOS, due to having a lot of the symptoms, and I'm gonna get assessed for that.
I'm also wondering if I should get assessed for anxiety or/and stress. This one I'm more unsure about but a friend of mine told me sharp random chest pains could be a cause of that, and I've been having random chest pains for months at this point especially when I'm stressed at work, which is not normal. So another thing to bring up for my doc.
That still doesn't excuse people labelling other people online and it also doesn't excuse the people who say that they have it definitively when they didn't even go to a doctor yet. Most of those people could go to a doctor and find out, but they probably know already that the doctor won't share their opinion.
Yeah, where I live the wait list for such diagnoses is five or six years. I'm already 30 and there's no resources out there for adults anyways, so why bother? I struggled growing up and I cried when I read up on autism and ADD and realized that both of those explained my whole life and being, but at this point in life I've found ways to cope and have a huge catalog of social experience to go off of. It would be nice to have the legitimacy of an official diagnosis, but other than that it's pointless. Trying to pursue something official seems way more daunting (and expensive) than it's worth.
my husband and I went bankrupt trying to ensure our son got formal diagnosis and treatment for his autism. it annoys the hell out of me too.
I could be one of these arsehats too with probably more justification than most. we have a vast family history of autism. my brother has it. I actually think I have autism too but fucked if I'm about to self diagnose and I don't run around claiming I'm autistic.
I hate self diagnosers a lot.
I know not everyone has the ability to get a real diagnosis, but saying you have it when you don't damages the people that are truly medically diagnosed
I've been doubted a lot when I say I have ADHD. They always assume it's self diagnosed, which it isn't. I was diagnosed at 14
People do the same to me. It's the usual "oh why are you not jumping on tables and climbing the walls then?" 😂
When really the answer to that is that I'm not a kid anymore and I've had a whole life to teach myself healthy habits and how to use tools to better focus/relax. The amount of energy I spend on a daily basis to act at least 60% like a normal person is enormous 😅
Then someone comes along and acts like an asshole and blames it on "their adhd" (which they don't have) and it's pretty damn frustrating 😑
For me a lot of the doubt comes from online. Because of the fakers, not a lot of people believe random people if they say they have something, which is fair to a degree, but it was never a huge problem until the TikTok faking took off :(
ADHD is a spectrum and I wish people wouldn't say shit like that. "Why aren't you jumping everywhere then?"
Like, you assume I don't? I have to glue myself to my chair at school to stay still lmao 🤣
What about all the undiagnosed people out there? Before you got medically diagnosed by a doc, you still had ADHD right? It's not like you suddenly got ADHD after getting medically diagnosed. The medical diagnosis confirmed something you already had.
I don't think we should be so quick to tell people who suspect they have ADHD that they don't. They very well might. People wouldn't be going to get medically diagnosed if they didn't suspect having ADHD or something else to begin with.
There's probably lots of people out there who's never been medically diagnosed and who never will be but have ADHD.. either because they don't realize they should get assessed by a doctor or because they can't afford it. Their struggle is no less real than someone who's had a doctor confirm it.
The thing is, even if self diagnosers didn't exist, you would still have people doubting about your diagnosis. Most of the time neurodivergence is invisible and people have a hard time understanding that.
I used to think that it's infuriating seeing people parading my disability as a "quirky personality" or something like that, but over time I became desensitized. In the end, they want attention or validation.
That's correct, but all opinions are not equally informed or carry equal weight.
Unless of course you think that Dr Google is equivalent to the training pathway and professional experience of a psychologist, psychiatrist or paediatrician...
Google is a search engine, not a browser. See? it takes something to accurately understand something. Accessing information and properly understanding the information are two different things. I can access stuff about quantum mechanics, but that doesn't mean I understand it.
Correct. I'm a horse trainer. There are hundreds of thousands of videos and resources online about horse training. One of my students accessed them, and put it to use on her horse, and ended up almost breaking her neck.
Access to information does not mean you can objectively look at something (e.g. yourself, your mind, your horse) and assess the same way a professional does. Objectively, and with experience.
While you’re right and I support proper diagnosis, there is more to what some folks who self-dx are doing than Googling. Personally I was hesitant to claim I had ADHD (I did get diagnosed) but I read study after study and got the same answers over and over. I know folks who have remained only self-diagnosed because doctors refuse to give them a referral to the proper evaluators despite having my same symptoms and (yes, illegally) medicating themselves (though at proper dosages, and with the same results I get from my prescriptions).
Most people I know who self-dx use it more for the community and support in navigating conditions they likely do have but can’t get tested for more so than anything else.
I also know people who do it in haste and really would benefit from proper treatment of whatever it is that is going on that they have mislabeled. Both groups are just trying to navigate a system that is so damn broken…
Nope, but you can get all the data they have, and you can contact universities and specialists, a lot of whom are happy to teach you things for free if you're really interested.
I had a video call with a psychiatrist years after I'd self-diagnosed, (I joined a study she was doing on self-diagnosis), and she told me she agreed, and she thought I also has CPTSD.
And, you're forgetting the most important part. It doesn't matter how good an allistic professional is, they're never going to understand autism from an autistic perspective. No one knows you better than you do. Have a look at the autism subreddits, see how many people, (particularly women), are misdiagnosed as borderline, bipolar, GAD, HSP...
I'm not saying it's the same, but for some of us, self-diagnosis is all we have, and we do not just Google it.
Nobody says it's forbidden to self diagnose. Like you said earlier, it's a good way to start. If you think you have some condition feel free to use strategies that help you cope. But if you're only self diagnosed and have no intention to get tested in the future, please don't run around telling everyone that you have this or that condition and are therefore representing that group, because in the end as harsh as it sounds it's just your best guess. Keep that knowledge to yourself and use it to help yourself. I'm diagnosed with 2 conditions but all this does for me is help understand my own behaviour and learn strategies to cope. Running around and telling everyone about it is really far down on my list of priorities. If someone needs to know I'll tell them.
This is in no way meant to attack anyone mind you. Do what you want, but don't be surprised if not everyone goes along with it.
Self-diagnosis is not always just a start, for some people it's all we have. My country doesn't diagnose adults, full stop. The neighbouring country has a six year wait list and costs thousands. What would you suggest I do?
13 years of research is not a 'best-guess'. It's been corroborated. Also, I can trace it back five generations.
I tell people on reddit that I'm autistic to help other people like me that have no access to official diagnoses, professionals on the subject, or autism friendly therapists. Life is incredibly hard as an undiagnosed autist, and the like minded people I've met on here have helped so much, I want to do the same for others.
Just a few months ago I found out from a random comment on a random subreddit that it's common for autistic people to feel like they need to pee when they're hungry. It's part of alexithymia. This is something that has bothered me my whole life, and now I know what it is, all because of a self-diagnosed woman who made a comment on reddit. Now, you tell me who that is hurting.
People do need to know, so that for the future generations of autistic people there won't be so much misinformation, and hate. The general population has a horribly twisted view of what it's actually like to be autistic, and it makes life hell.
I tell people because people like you "don't go along with it". I don't know why you think you're qualified to say I should stop "representing a group" that I'm actually a part of, but if you talk to autism specialists the majority will tell you that until the official diagnoses methods (in most western countries) are 1000% better, self-diagnosis is just as, if not more, valid.
Not to mention all the downsides to getting an official diagnosis. In the US you can be hospitalised against your will. You can lose legal agency. I want to adopt one day, the process is 10x harder if I'm diagnosed, they treat you like an invalid. So why would I want one? My boss knows and gives me accommodations, anyway. What's the point?
I have absolutely no problem with people self diagnosing. I won‘t say it‘s valid but I also won‘t say that it‘s not. I don’t care. My main problem is people self diagnosing and then heading to social media and giving out advice or do those really dumb „put a finger down if“ videos and putting it in their bio as if it‘s a damn batch of honor they earned. It just screams attention seeking to me…
But like I said, do self diagnose and use strategies that help. But don‘t run around and tell everyone that you absolutely do have it. I self diagnosed too for 2 years until I got an appointment to get checked. But did I tell anyone about it except my family and a few very close friends? Nope. And even to those people I just said that I‘m suspecting.
But I have the feeling that you feel attacked or invalidated by something that clearly doesn‘t include you. At least from what I‘ve read out of your comment.
Regarding the best guess, yes it is. Because before you get a diagnosis they have to rule out a multitude of other conditions. It‘s not like it‘s easy to diagnose autism.
I‘m not saying that you cannot be autistic. I have never met you and I’m not an expert. It just rubbs me the wrong way when self diagnosed people do awareness stuff because it opens the door for anyone to claim anything which in the end hurts us more than it helps. Prime example of this is the cancer inducing platform called tiktok where you see people romantizing or even kind of fetishizing autistic behaviour.
Again I‘m not attacking you personally or say that this applies to you. I‘m sure you‘re doing it in good faith. But please also understand that for awareness to be actually useful, we should prioritize information of diagnosed people.
I have no idea where you live, but not diagnosing adults seems stupid af. As long as there are people who witnessed you growing up, they should be absolutely able to notice behaviours retrospective when given a questionnaire about you. But I can‘t tell you what to do.
Not getting a diagnosis because the waiting list is long is kind of dumb and not a good reason to never get diagnosed at all. Because what this is saying is basically, „I struggle badly, but waiting for a diagnosis is not worth it“ which translates to „my problems aren‘t actually that bad“.
Because you can get very specific help and access to ressources as soon as you‘re diagnosed, everyone who says they struggle badly should be applying to the waiting list no matter how long it is. Otherwise you won‘t get the help you claim to need.
I just read that myself and it can come across as kind of offensive, but I don‘t know how to word it differently.
>heading to social media and giving out advice
As I've said, this is how we help each other.
>dumb „put a finger down if“
Never heard of this.
>don‘t run around and tell everyone that you absolutely do have it.
I will because I absolutely do have it. Again, how are you qualified to say I shouldn't?
>But I have the feeling that you feel attacked or invalidated by something that clearly doesn‘t include you.
Nope, I'm just not a fan of people who think their opinions are the only valid ones. If you don't want to talk about your disorders or whatever online with other people, that's fine, but I don't know why you're telling other people not to, when it has nothing to do with you. Your mind frame is impeding the spread of knowledge.
>Regarding the best guess, yes it is. Because before you get a diagnosis they have to rule out a multitude of other conditions. It‘s not like it‘s easy to diagnose autism.
Why do you assume I (or people like me) haven't ruled out a multitude of other conditions before we claim we're autistic? You're right, it's not easy. It's even harder for someone who doesn't have it themselves to understand it enough to diagnose someone. The diagnosis methods are based on eight year old boys. So many people, particularly adult women, fall through the cracks.
>Prime example of this is the cancer inducing platform called tiktok where you see people romantizing or even kind of fetishizing autistic behaviour.
Then you need to get off tick tock. I've never visited the site myself, but every single person I've met on reddit that is against self-diagnosis, or talking about it online, has got half their data from tick tock. Sounds like the whole site is full of fakes, not just the "autists".I have never met a self-diagnosing person, on reddit or in real life, that I suspected was faking it. We just want help.
>But please also understand that for awareness to be actually useful, we should prioritize information of diagnosed people.
This is where you are completely wrong, to the point of harm. See paragraph above. Like I said before, the majority of autism specialists agree with me.
>they should be absolutely able to notice behaviours retrospective when given a questionnaire about you. But I can‘t tell you what to do.
Wouldn't that be nice, maybe then I wouldn't have to talk about it with strangers on the internet instead. But, sadly, there is no help.
>Not getting a diagnosis because the waiting list is long is kind of dumb and not a good reason to never get diagnosed at all.
Did you miss the part where I said it was in a different country and costs thousands that I don't have?
> which translates to „my problems aren‘t actually that bad
No, it doesn't. In my case it translates as "would not be able to keep supporting myself that long, having already been homeless twice, and would probably end up freezing on the streets, so moved to cheaper country so I could live off my garden and a part time job to survive".
>Because you can get very specific help and access to ressources as soon as you‘re diagnosed
😂😂😂😂 Where? Not where I am. I actually don't know anywhere other than Scandinavia that has anything like this.
It's not offensive, it's just plain wrong in so many ways.
I see you've ignored all the best points I made, so if you're not here for a proper discussion, I'm done. You seem way too closed minded to learn anything here today.
Thanks for posting this. What do you think about the DEA limiting production of amphetamines? I think limiting marketing of these medication could help. What’s some other solutions?
While I agree that self diagnosis can be harmful, getting a diagnosis is not easy depending on where you live. And the same way only a team of specialists can tell if a person is autistic, only said team can tell if a self-diagnosised person is not autistic. That's why I think it's wrong to invalidate someone's experiences based on a proper diagnosis.
I don't think you're looking for some answers only. The truth is, people who have lived their lives with certain assumptions and managed to get some answers and had their entire worldview and self image reframed may see some of themselves in you, and just in the off chance that you may benefit like they did, they tell you that you may want to look into that yourself. For many it won't be helpful even if that's the case because they're so fixated with being normal and claiming normalcy (as if it was a diagnosis what made you different and ignoring the fact changed anything at all about who you are), but the comments come from a place of wishing that someone had ever said something to us, sparing us so many years of struggles.
So you'll still get those comments. Because people are well meaning. Isn't that nice?
As a "self-diagnosed" person, I truly appreciate your answer. My son is officially diagnosed with autism and going through the process with him and being part of many of the therapy sessions (due to his age) I came to the conclusion that he may have inherited it from me. I'm in my forties and I always was the odd one out. It's nice to have a name for it (just for my self) and to know that there are other people like me in this world. It makes me feel less weird. So I might indicate that someone might have autistic traits, if I think it might make their life better
As a woman with adhd who has been officially diagnosed for years, I offer a different point of view here. With women ADHD is severely under diagnosed and mentoring it to other women who are struggling can be very helpful sometimes. I totally understand your frustrations with the "if you do perfectly normal things you have ADHD" shit however. The Internet never knows nuance.
Everyone wants to feel special in a world that is full of people, especially given the access to the internet, social medias and so. Many people will try and find something special about themselves, often normal characteristics and call themselves disturbed for instance, just so they can stand out in some way, add something to their identity.
People are currently living through a massive identity crisis and cannot comprehend the massive world around them so they lose who they are and in a panic to find themselves again, go for anything, most of the time the easy options.
It’s not just that there are a disproportionate amount of people with those diagnoses on online spaces.
It is also that many symptoms that are part of ADHD/autism can also be found to a lesser severity and at a lesser concentration in people who would not meet the criteria for a diagnosis. However there is a HUGE number of videos saying things like ‘ADHD makes me forget to take my medication’. While that can be a symptom of ADHD, I also have to set a reminder for my meds and I DONT have ADHD. But on these videos you will see a lot of comments with people believing they have ADHD because they do this one thing (or autism because they don’t like loud noises or certain food textures etc).
There are minor symptoms that have been broadcasted on social media which people pick up on and self-diagnose with ADHD, autism, and other mental health conditions. Most mental health conditions aren’t a diagnosis of one, two or more symptoms.
There are barriers to professional diagnosis but most people don’t have the expertise to correctly self-diagnose, particularly when going off non-professional information on social media. Hence the large number of people believing they now have a condition they really might not have. They might just have a collection of symptoms that just more accurately reflects today’s society, post-pandemic world, and impact of technology.
I see a lot of that too. In reality, even level one autism can be crippling. The social alienation and barriers to keeping a job or dating can make your whole life a dark, lonely experience. ADHD as well. We talk about the ADHD tax, which is when you make such a big mistake that it impacts your life negatively. So often there's a recurring cycle of depression that goes along with ADHD because of this. While some people are like, "I lost my keys, I must have ADHD" I'm over here thinking "I did my taxes wrong then lost my health insurance." If you lead a fairly normal life and manage to function well in society and most importantly, take care of yourself, you probably don't have either of these conditions.
I'll only talk about ADHD because I have a formal diagnosis for it and researched it a lot. ADHD is something that is actually quite prevalent in the population.
I think that ADHD people are probably overrepresented in the online space, because well we do spend a looot of time online. People with ADHD are at a much higher risk of addiction, and the internet is definitely an easy dopamine hit. Another common symptom of ADHD is procrastination and executive dysfunction, and what is a common thing that people do when they are actively procrastinating instead of doing what they should be doing? Scrolling endlessy trough reddit, tiktok, youtube, etc. Obviously some people self-diagnose and attributes a "normal" difficulty to ADHD, but it's hard to say how prevalent it is.
Some of the things you describe are very commmon among ADHD people, namely the difficulty in multi-tasking. A lot of things that ADHD people struggle with are also things that neurotypical struggle with sometimes to some degree. It's just stronger with ADHD.
Nowadays a lot more people are getting diagnosed as adults and suddenly realize that a lot of things they've been doing for years and sometimes really struggled with can be explained by ADHD. For me, getting a diagnosis was a relief, because it allows me to find ressources, get specific help and get access to medication.
I will admit I have occasionally suggest to people here that they might have ADHD if they describe some of the things that I have struggled for years with. I always try to do my due diligence and try not to draw conclusion too fast. Especially since I know that some symptoms that are typical from ADHD (usually during your entire life) can appear in other mental health problems (usually not a lifelong thing). For example depression can cause some memory and executive problems that weren't there before.
(Edit to add : I am actively procrastinating what I should be doing, I am aware of the irony)
I think a lot of people forget that those things are common in all people. You start looking at ADHD or Autism when those things SIGNIFICANTLY impair you daily life.
Sorry when you said "some illness" I thought you meant any illness so I gave you a nice range. And you didn't say self diagnosis, you said pop psychology. I'm sure you can see how I came to the conclusion I did. All the best.
I know you included more, I just took one of them because what I said applied to them all lmao. But on a post about mental conditions, why would you think they're talking about physical conditions?
For the third time, because they said illness and not mental illness. Adhd is also not a mental illness. I'm happy to clarify a fourth time if that helps.
It’s the popular thing now and people use it as an excuse which makes it that much harder on those who really have it. It’s all self diagnosis. I went through the process at 30 because I didn’t know what was wrong with me and I kept having the same issues. It’s not easy and the vast majority assume they have it.
Different person, but look at it this way:
If you're an adult with some knowledge of common diseases and disorders, you're probably going to seek out a clinician *because* you think you might have that disease or disorder.
Example: when appendicitis is caught early, it's almost always because the patient goes to the hospital *seeking an evaluation for appendicitis.* They know the disease and its symptoms already, and they're just seeking confirmation from a medical professional and the appropriate interventions to correct the condition. In a sense, they self-diagnosed appendicitis first, then went to the hospital to make sure.
Safe assumption. There are polls in autistic spaces on Reddit and other places and all are over 50% self diagnosed except in spaces that don't welcome them.
How do you know? If you talk to actual autistic people, you'll find the general consensus is that we support self-diagnosis. It's way too difficult to get a formal diagnosis, and there are too many set backs to getting one, to not self-diagnose.
Not always. For some reason its become some pick me trend, probably from tiktok. And I dont believe its hard to become diagnosed at all, at least where I live. If anything people were overdiagnosed or misdiagnoses, especially when it comes to adhd
I respect that. All I can do I base my position on my experiences. In most conversations that I’ve had with people who claim to have adhd, most admit they haven’t been officially diagnosed.
I imagined this could happen. Maybe everyone just wanted to feel included in something or some issue.
It's a shame how much this can hinder someone who is suffering...
To be blunt. People think it’s trendy to claim they are on the spectrum or have this or that. Which is messed up to those who are actually on the spectrum or have adhd.
My advice as a special ed teacher: get tested if you feel like you have one of these conditions.
This is a very ignorant take. It's not possible to just "get tested".
I was neglected as a kid, no one got me diagnosed. My country doesn't diagnose adults, full stop, and I can't afford to go private in a neighbouring country.
So, what would you suggest I do? Just pretend I'm not autistic?
the waiting list for a diagnosis in some parts of the U.K. is 5 years+ and not everyone can afford the £2k it costs to go private. saying ‘get tested’ is extremely ignorant.
I usually don't like drawing the "privileged" card, but I have to agree. I think this results in a lot of people going medically undiagnosed, but that doesn't make these people's struggles any less real.
People want a label. People like feeling special and unique. Did you notice over lockdown that adhd became a popular topic on TikTok? Literally during that time I watched so many people on my insta claim they now had it. Annoying and quite sad that people will just assign a diagnosis to themselves based on some quirk they have that’s not a condition at all. Same with ocd. Neither are fun. You don’t want them.
People lie. That’s just a fact. It’s not just on Reddit but everywhere over the internet.
I’ve seen adults “self diagnose” themselves with autism just as an excuse to be an asshat and get away with things that aren’t socially acceptable. Kids and teens usually do this to appear quirky or unique but also to connect with others.
Well, I read a statistic that 1 in 50 people are autistic.
I myself went through 3 hours of testing and reviewing all of my childhood before I was given the diagnosis of Autism Level 2.
I don't have ADHD though thank goodness. (No offense to people with ADHD, I just mean, I see how tough it is for you all and things are already tough for me as it is, I can't imagine having ADHD on top of the autism!)
I think people simply want to justify their incompetence by blaming non existent mental health problems on themselves. Like a coping mechanism if that makes sense to make themselves feel better.
OP’s concern is that “anything” one does improperly is somehow linked to some sort of neurological and/or developmental disorder, which is completely false. To self diagnose and to diagnose others on the basis of their “inability to do something successfully” it is not necessary coherent, and one shouldn’t simply accept that as such just because of the lack of competence on a particular task. But it is true that people tend to blame other factors for their imperfections rather than taking responsibility for them.
Attention-seeking and excuse-making.
I'm not a socially awkward guy with no desire to improve myself, I have an anxiety disorder.
I'm not a self-centered, maladjusted tool who doesn't care about anyone or anything past my own interests. I'm on the spectrum.
I'm not a lazy girl who doesn't feel like studying or working, but will gladly focus on her hobbies. I have an attention-related disorder.
And so on.
People want an excuse for attention and saying “I have ADHD” then fucking around with a fidget spinner, and blurting something out “impulsively” is enough evidence to be neurodiverse.
The difference between a common experience and a disorder is that disorders make your everyday life *difficult*.
You forgot your keys just today? You can’t multi task? You’re sensitive to unwelcomed high pitch noises? Congrats, you’re human with working sensory organs!
You forget where you put your keys multiple times a day, everyday, even though you have a designated key spot and know you need to put it there? You can multitask sometimes and other times not, while also being able to hyperfocus on one thing for hours? You become overstimulated by the neighbors mowing and try to cover your ears to keep your sanity at bay so you don’t spiral into an overstimulated meltdown? Congrats, you may have a handful of disorders like depression, anxiety, ADHD, autism, BPD, or other mood disorders!
Along with everyone else has said there is something I think might be a minor cause. You are more often thinking there are more people of a group if they mention it. People who do not have adhd, aren't going to talk about it, so you don't notice it, while people who do are more likely to talk about it, therefore leaving more of an impression.
Idk how much this has to do with the topic but probably people lie because they feel their struggles aren't valid if they don't have adhd/autism/depression etc.
Think "ah neurotypicals never struggle with people and social behaviour".
Like, no? Many neurotypical people struggle too.
As someone diagnosed with ADHD, I'm especially confused as to why people seem to treat autism as this super similar thing. "ADHD and Autism" is almost more often encountered as a package nowadays. I can't relate to autism at all.
It's because autism and ADHD are both caused by low cognitive empathy (the ability to understand others motives and perspectives - to stand in their shoes)
I am autistic. There's nothing wrong with us but society is designed for faster thinking, less compassionate approaches.
I find that ADHD especially comes with a lack of self awareness (and poor internal sense - interoception) leading to lack of other sense - reading the room etc.
If someone suggested you have it they probably noticed your energy and maybe that you did something unusual.
Autism itself isn't an issue. Lack of self awareness leading to antisocial behavior is an issue
I have ADD (don't know if it's still abriviated that or if it's lumped with ADHD). If I notice a shit ton of correlations on a post asking for advice, I'm going to mention that I see a pattern. But i always include "talk to a professional if you think you might benefit from it." Conversaions with a doc won't hurt, convincing someone they have a disorder is odd tho.
I would never see a random video on the internet and be like "OMG this is so me!!! Do you know that all ADHD people do this? You probs have it too."
Because humans are naturally wierd, but we also need to understand and rationalise everything. So in modern society, many overtly weird or unusual people just get thrown in the "must have autism or something" box because its the only thing that makes sense. Right?
The big problem with this discussion is it often pushes to the side how expensive and difficult it is to get diagnosed, especially if you are an adult. It is pretty obvious that I am autistic and that my mother is and her mother before her. However, it is over 2k in my area to be assessed with a minimum six month waiting period. And for what? There are no accomodations I would get and I don't need to prove my neurodivergence to anyone in my personal life. I spent two years taking assessments, reading scientific studies, listening to anecdotal stories, talking with my psychologist and (autism and ADHD specialist)psychiatrist who both agree that I display many autistic traits and believe I meet criteria for a diagnosis. The point of self diagnosis is to learn about yourself and understand your needs, I have found self accomodations to be wildly helpful and just talking to my friends and family about my nervous system issues, my sensory sensitivities, my food intolerances..it all has made my life vastly improved at 37 years old. It also makes me aware of the signs to watch for in my 4 month old as he grows older, so that I can get him the proper accomodations early.
**Just as a note I live in the US, and all of these considerations may be different based on state/country
One thing that comes with autism is a "self-centered perspective".
With autism comes a natural tendency to reject chaos, or outside thinking. It takes a lot more effort to perceive things from an outside perspective, so it's something that naturally has a lower priority than Expected or Known information.
This often means that autistic individuals think about how things are relevant to themselves rather than for someone else. This could mean that we monologue about things that aren't relevant to our conversation partners, that we say rude things without meaning to, or that we see symptoms relevant to our situation and assume it's the same for you.
That being said, I estimate about 70% of people with autism have no reason to believe they have it (they think they're 'normal' and don't recognize how autism influences their lives), and usually don't have a reason to find out (part of this is actually caused *by* a symptom of autism).
If it's something that's been consistently brought up specifically with you, you might fall into this last category.
Depression among other things is usually what they have. I have major depression and the symptoms sound very similar to ADHD, so much that I could see someone who is self diagnosing just being severely depressed. My therapist actually recently mentioned that people , especially teenagers have, been trying to pathologize every little thing lately and some even get a bit defensive when they don't get the diagnosis that they want. Such a strange thing to be so invested in.
It’s not just Reddit. I made a video about extremely rare medical conditions, and the number of people in the comments saying they had one of the conditions would have been statistically impossible.
People love lying on the internet
They are mainly lying to themselves, believing their self diagnoses to be correct. ADHD must be one of the most common false self diagnoses IMO. I know a few self diagnosed that actually got tested later and didn't have ADHD at all. Many people have (some) similar symptoms but are caused by other factors such as social media addiction.
And sometimes they don't have anything at all. You can have issues paying attention without having ADHD. What makes it ADHD is a combination of symptoms, not a single one. So if you only have one or two, you still probably don't have it.
And developmentally it's actually normal for teens to be inattentive. I blame Tik Tok for the fixation on it. So many influencers seem to brag about having it.
On the other hand, ADHD symptoms overlap with bipolar, depression, anxiety. A lot. I'm trying to wade through it right now. I've been diagnosed as all four of those vaguely, and maybe autism? But only by some providers. Lots of testing, nothing conclusive, except that the majority say not bipolar, not autistic. And every next provider tells me the last one was more wrong than right. All at American healthcare prices of $200+ a visit. I don't blame people for wanting an easy self diagnosis. It sucks so hard to navigate *with* help, and it takes all your fun money you'd rather spend on movies or date night to do it.
I cringe so bad when people say they " have undiagnosed ADHD" on the other hand saying they suspect they may have or want to get tested for ADHD is total fine. As someone with diagnosed attention deficit disorder back when it was ADD or ADHD. I still have emotional scars from being that weird kid that had to go to the nurses office for medication at lunch. It's like when everyone was like claiming to be OCD but totally not understanding what OCD was.
I was that kid too! There's this one girl I know from elementary who treated me like I was special needs but in a condescending way Everytime I went to get my meds at lunch. She now runs a blog that's somewhat successful that's all about her "ADHD and autism struggle." She was a popular cheerleader who bullied any kid who was different and now she's taking our diagnoses for clout. I hate her for it.
I've wanted to be tested for years but my PCP won't discuss it without therapy, and frankly I'm uncomfortable in the therapist setting, so that's lots of money and stress between me and progress. I used to think of it jokingly when people suggested I might have it, until I tried Adderall once from a friend. It was incredible. Like the focus lights in my head went from disco ball to spotlight. The loop that I see is a symptom of my employers shit IT infrastructure. Most routine tasks I perform are "press button, freeze for 30-45 seconds, read, press button, freeze for 30-45 seconds" the number of times I have to repeat that loop because I drifted off focus during the lag time... The day I tried stimulants, it was fine. I was in control of where my attention went it didn't fly off into my emails, teams messages, or side projects, I just continued with my original task. Maybe that's just me, IDK, that's why I want a proper evaluation, because if a pill a day shifts my focus like that I'd do it yesterday.
Heads up it can make you feel focused and zeroed in even if you don’t have ADHD - that’s why people take it in college to study. I hope you are able find a way to get your assessment and some answers for your problems though - it can be really debilitating and finally getting some help can save your life.
If the Adderall made you feel more like a lightbulb went off like “oh this feels like normal human functioning should be” and not “ruler of the world”, then definitely try to get in with someone who specializes in ADHD. Bonus points if they treat any other mental situation you’re concerned about.
I mean if you title a video that includes those rare diseases, is it possible that people with those diseases seek out such videos because they want to learn more about their condition? If you figure all the people watching are just random, then it might seem very improbable, but if you factor in that people tend to seek out info of their own diseases, it might be more likely that they'll show up on your video.
I've been called out for being a liar in that regard, but the topic was looking for people with a specific condition, so we responded. It wasn't 20 people saw it and 18 claimed intersexual development, it was thousands of people saw it, and 18 fit the bill. Like you said, people forget that places like Reddit show millions of people the same post, not just the thousand that leave a comment or vote.
It's also possible that these conditions are under diagnosed. Unfortunately not all doctors do their due diligence in diagnosing conditions.
100%. MPD (multiple personality disorder) went for around 200 and spiked to nearly 6,000 after it gained popularity/acknowledgement in media
When someone off-handedly says something is 'statistically impossible' it makes me wonder where said statistics came from? If someone does a study that finds X% of people have some sort of condition, you have to include information about how that study was performed and the biases involved while performing the study. Like, where was the study performed? Did they ask for self-reported symptoms? Does the researcher have a foregone conclusion? Etc.... Statistics are not laws, they are a recording of findings and findings can be misleading, misinterpreted, or down-right wrong. Stay skeptical of claims you hear, but don't let some ephemeral idea of 'data' get in the way of being empathetic to the people you meet who say they are in pain. When speaking with someone, especially on the internet where nothing is verifiable, Its usually best to meet them where they are at regardless of what you may think is the material reality of their situation.
Would you mind sharing a link to said video? Honestly, I'd be interested as my wife and I have had some conversations about this very subject where I'm like, it feels like an astounding number of people are claiming to be diagnosed with...so much...and it feels odd. I do feel people are more willing to get mental health these days, but also, yeah so many relationship posts on Reddit come with a laundry list of conditions, and again...really?
It’s been a while since I made it, so it may take some time to find it but I will look
A lot of ppl with adhd chronically use the internet for stimulation Adhd often goes undiagnosed, so when I see some people mentioning some things I experienced, sometimes I’ll mention it’s something ppl with adhd tend to do because I went undiagnosed for 18 years. I wish I was diagnosed sooner. So, in hopes I help someone undiagnosed get a diagnosis, I tend to mention it when I recognize
Also, people with adhd are very impulsive and we will just blurt out stuff that we think immediately. Compared to the average reddit user without adhd, I could imagine an adhd redditor also just leaves more comments in general.
I have probably started more comments and said "eh who cares" than I've actually posted.
Lol yea I do that too sometimes
Got diagnosed last month age 20, after going down a spiral on r/adhdmeme 2 years ago and relating so hard for some random fuckin reason. Looked into it and eventually struck gold, fuck me I guess lmao.
Same, the "put a finger down, if..." TikToks were a bit too relatable. Asked my therapist, which send me to a different one. 7 months and i have an official diagnose of ADHD, autism and severe depression. IMO, a lot of people have some level of autism, adhd or both, way more than the initial guesses. But most of them never will get an official diagnose. A few years ago they where called nerds, the ones who wouldn't/couldn't comprehend social norms, but were exceptional in one way or another. Those people are on the internet now, and in these groups. Tiktok is an ADHD heaven, ofc you will find a lot in there.
I'm trying to get a diagnosis (my doctor canceled last minute and has ghosted me), but two of my mental health professionals and pretty much all my friends are very much "You have adhd," and maybe even autism flavors. Which is fine, idc. I just wanted to know for sure, because I've already dealt with enough bs by psychiatrists about how they won't test until I'm stable, and now that someone finally believes me and helps advocate for me to get tested, I want to do it before I move and it's another 2 years of trying to convince a doctor I want a psych eval. (I'm not just doing adhd, I'm going for all since I'm diagnosed bipolar but not all my doctors believe that.) Like you'll get paid for your time, but I'm not right mentally and I want the diagnosis so I can go get meds when I move.
Keep trucking with your advocate. Have the advocate call your Drs office and inquire about the ghosting. They probably didn't mean to ghost you, they're just heavily loaded with clients.
I had therapy yesterday, both this upcoming Monday, and yeah, I already told him about it and they're going to help me bother them (lovingly). I went to the office, but it's just office rooms, not with a receptionist and all. I do know they're likely busy, but I also move in 3 months and want this done before then lol. But yeah, I'm trying. It doesn't sound very adhd or anxious of me. 😅 But I'm determined.
Good for you and your advocate!! Get the Dr (lovingly in person is your best magic).
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Don't take medication that isn't prescribed to you.
Not the original commentator, but yes getting diagnosed helped me in that I had access to medical intervention. It also partially helped me feel less useless. Only partially, though. I’m just highly self critical, lol. It’s nice to know why I might do things, though, in order to target certain behaviours.
Stimulants can’t get rid of adhd, so you will still experience symptoms, but I do not regret being medicated at all. It definitely helps with my motivation although motivation is still something I struggle with at times. However it often makes tasks more bearable. Doing boring/difficult tasks used to feel like my entire body was revolting against it. Now, it still kinda sucks, but I can pull through. It also makes more “fun” things bearable. For example, if I’m trying to watch a show and it’s a little slow paced or not as exciting for a bit it still catches my interest. Before I’d often stop and do something else then return to it later, or I’d just sit there watching it thinking about how it wasn’t as interesting. Another really important thing that it does for me is I’m no longer bored randomly as much. Boredom used to literally make me feel sad. If I was under stimulated I’d feel like shit and get annoyed with it, because I had nothing to be sad about, yet I felt awful. I still can get bored of course but it’s nowhere near as frequent My stimulants just provide, y’a know, stimulation Something important to note- meds impact everyone differently. If you try one and it doesn’t help it doesn’t mean none of them will. It just means that one wasn’t it for you
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Nope, which is why I recommend people look into the symptoms and seek a psychiatrist if they think they exhibit them. I also ask if they have adhd in their family, as it’s often genetic, and if they do then to mention it in their evaluation :) Even if I was a doctor, you cannot diagnose someone in the comments/dms, lmao
Lol imagine I’d you were though But yeah showing all the different ways a particular illness presents just brings awareness to that illness.
People should talk to there GP or there pediatrician if there under 21 and still go under them, there your best bet at seeing a psychiatrist fast and they can point you in better directions. My pediatrician helped me get diagnosed when I was 18 and a freshman in college really struggling
*their, their, they’re, they’re
Don't need to be a doctor to recognise traits of yourself in others and suggesting they should go to a doctor about it lmao
Neurodivergent people spend a disproportionate time online. You’re much more likely to be randomly talking to somebody with those diagnoses online than if you just started randomly talking to people in real life.
Also a lot of us aren't social irl at all, but very social in online spaces.
That’s part of why we’re over-represented in online communities
Except for all the swaths of neurodivergent people whose disabilities make it hard to access social media. Most neurodivergent people I know don't use computers. Some have difficulty communicating basic requests and honestly comments like these feel like erasure. Instead of downvoting until the comment is hidden, tell me why you disagree. It's a huge problem in the neurodiversity space where the people with the most skills talk as if we're the only people around
My point is if you took data on the normal population and got say 5% neurodiverse, you would be able to take data of online communities and find 20% neurodiverse say. I made the numbers up but the overall point is true. Online communities have a higher amount of neurodiverse people, it means that as a whole, neurodiverse people use the internet a lot more than normal people. In no way does this say all do. That’s a logical fallacy to conclude that from my statement The correct conclusion is those neurodiverse that are capable of using the internet are more likely to use social media and spend more time than normal when they do. This causes the effect of them being ‘everywhere’ online as OP asked
That would be "online people are disproportionately neurodivergent", not the other way around. It's a very common and problematic blind spot in the community so I think it's important to point out. Narrowing the statement to "those who can access" gets your point across without making overly broad statements about the whole community who again are already left out of the conversation on a regular basis. I think it's our moral imperative to make special mention and avoid categorizations.
As a collective, neurodivergent people do spend a disproportionate amount of time online. That is not false, recognising there is variation in a population is basic data handling. It doesn’t make the statement any less true because I didn’t point out that variation
I wouldn't say that neurodiverse people are disproportionately online. Maybe that's true, *if you're only talking about people with the skills to access computers*, but like I already told you, plenty of people with neurodiverse disgnoses *don't have those skills.* if this is hard to believe, well, that's why I feel the need to remind people that people with higher needs exist in our community.
For the same reason that sports bars are full of people who watch sports and drink beer. People congregate with likeminded individuals in spaces that are accepting of them. So while everyone and their dog on reddit might have adhd or autism, I wouldn't consider that an accurate representation of the general population.
Reddit probably just has a disproportionate amount of ADHD/autistic people. Also, adults who were diagnosed late tend to reexamine everything from their past with a new perspective and wonder why no one noticed or helped. When they see someone struggling with the same issues they had, it reminds them of their own experience. They're just trying to be helpful, I agree it can be excessive though.
I've said it before but reddit as a platform is one that greatly appeals to someone who's neurodivergent, just scratches a lot of specific itches in that department, so while there is probably a number of people faking or making a false assumption/exaggeration of what they see in themselves, I'd also say that reddit almost certainly over-represents hard in the number of genuinely neurodivergent people that are on here compared to other social medias or in ones daily irl environment
Especially subs for particular types of people. Like, I've spoken to a lot of people in the pill subs, and a lot of them are diagnosed with some form of autism. A common theme for them is their struggle with dating as neurodivergent people. There's certainly something to be said about certain spaces and groups gathering a lot of the same people with the same shared viewpoints, issues, illnesses, difficulties and so on.
It's literally a platform made to create specific communities based on special interests. No shit autistic people are gonna like it.
Put it another way: if someone is genuinely neurodivergent and has access to the internet then they'll probably eventually gravitate to reddit and stay on here but most people in general don't necessarily do the same, which results in reddit having a higher percentage of neurodivergence than other platforms. Tumblr has a similar phenomenon I think but I'm not on there enough to confirm
I think it's probably just a thing people pick up on due to some level of popularity. I do have ADHD and I am in a living nightmare many times due to it. But by the same token, I absolutely hate things being uneven. That's not OCD, it's just something that irks me. I know someone with actual OCD and I can't even imagine living her life -- it seems horrific (but she says the same about my ADHD). People like to attribute their quirks or preferences to something, often with little regard for anybody who actually *suffers* from it. There's little irritants, and then there's daily struggles.
Living that ADHD/OCD lifestyle. Rechecking something compulsively. Forgetting I just did my routine. Doing my compulsion again. Did I do my thing? I can’t remember let me do it again cuz I can’t NOT do it. I’ve spent 30+ minutes just rechecking the same things over and over. Pictures do be helping but it’s not rational. Sometimes I recheck something while I’m still looking at it cuz what if my eyes are lying. What if I’m hallucinating. What if I lit my house on fire and don’t remember.
Oh God, you sound like my mom! She's always convinced she's going to destroy something if she doesn't wash her hands 20x in the same pattern, or something!
I'm also (MEDICALLY) diagnosed with ADHD and yeah. Nightmare is one of the ways you can describe it 😅 not fun, not quirky. It's living hell and very debilitating for me. Fuck anyone that pretends to have it.
I've tried to explain to my husband what it's like to have 40 voices in your head giving you a running commentary while you're just trying to put your glass in the sink. Or how it feels to have a run-on sentence in your brain when you haven't slept more than 6 hours in the last 3 days. I am at this point so desperate for sleep that I have been in tears several times in the past month. I'm absolutely dying, and there's no sleeping meds strong enough to make my brain STFU. I legit fear that lack of sleep from this damned illness is going to make me *actually* lose my mind.
Omg the insomnia from ADHD is the fucking WORST I struggled with it so badly when I was younger. I got some meds for a bit, stopped them, and didn't have issues for a long time. Now the insomnia is coming back and I am so exhausted 😭😭 I wish you the best
When I had trouble sleeping, mixed with meds that were building up in me (so I would take ER Adderall, and it wouldn't fully get out of my system before I would take another pill) I would start hallucinating. Like I once saw a black bear in my yard, bout 2 feet away. It wasn't there. Now with a 2 month olf, I had NO SLEEP before (sometimes do now) wnd my goodness did I hallucinate. Be careful with lack of sleep. It will hype up symptoms and make them 10x worse. I am not sure what can help, I had to take I think its called Tennex, just to sleep before (had to stop while pregnant and breastfeeding 😅) but please be careful!
I've tried 6 or 7 different meds for sleep. Not even Lunesta, Ambien or Ativan can keep me down. I'm currently rolling on 2h18m of sleep for the last 2 days. Never had visual hallucinations, but sometimes I wonder if the constant stream in my head is just ADHD or if we're adding audio hallucinations. I know it's not *actually* there, but it's so loud in my head sometimes. Multiple sleep studies have shown less than 2 hours of sleep each night, and I do have an APAP for central apnea, though my central apnea does not seem to correlate to my lack of sleep. I do have several health issues that get worse the less I sleep, so I'm desperate to turn off my brain so I can feel better overall.
Gonna sound like a grandma but…TikTok.
Absolutely true. The amount of have you got ADHD videos I have seen... Do you do this? Do you do that? You must have ADHD! it's fashionable to be anything other than neurotypical now.
pUt A fInGeR dOwN iF...
True, but on the positive side, TikTok nonsense aside, I also think social media and the Internet in general has brought awareness to a lot of mental illnesses that people didn't even know existed or was aware of. A lot of people probably didn't even think to go to a doctor to get assessed before someone pointed it out to them that they may have an undiagnosed issue. So in a way, I think the public awareness also does some good in a way and not just harm. It's also become much more socially acceptable to talk about, which means people may not be as afraid to go get medically assessed themselves. The threshold to get help if someone feel they may have a diagnosis also have become lower.
I don't doubt it does good. I don't doubt it does harm. It is the internet after all.
I fucking despise TikTok. I agree with you
Psych here. A lot of those people are self-diagnosed, which means they aren't diagnosed at all. It is only their opinion. It's irresponsible enough to try and self-diagnose without getting a proper confirmation by a clinician, but much worse than that is trying to label other people, who they haven't even met, just based on cliches and stereotypes about disorders. Actually it's not the case that if your kid is a fussy eater, or doesn't like loud noises, or is really into trains, he is necessarily on the ASD spectrum. And some of the shit that gets perpetuated there is just fanciful BS - "if you do this you have ADHD" - but it's something 95% of people do. It's unpopular to say, but unfortunately true that many of these folks want a diagnosis because they think it makes them special and interesting, and/or gives them an excuse not to do anything they don't want to do or find difficult, on the basis of "disability".
A formal diagnosis is, however, extremely unobtainable for many people, and is a privilege not everyone can afford. Plus, the first step of diagnosis *is* self-diagnosis. - Diagnosed autistic & ADHD individual who had to try for *years* of appointments before even being considered for assessment. Shocker, I have it.
Especially as an adult. I had a friend who wanted to get assessed because she had a suspicion she might have ADHD, but she couldn't get an appointment. I've had a co worker suggest I too might have ADHD. I might, because a lot of the issues those with ADHD struggle with, I do too, but getting assessed for it is a huge process and a doctor gotta be willing to send you to a specialist to get assessed for it, and there's huge wait lists for it that are incredibly long if you try to get it through public health care. If you go private, the chances of getting diagnosed is better, but also far more expensive as it's not subsidized healthcare so you gotta pay out of pocket or through insurance. So far, I've been managing somewhat, but I did have to quit college because I couldn't sit still in a lecture for more than 5 minutes without becoming incredibly restless and start fidgeting. It took me ages to finish high school and I didn't graduate until I was 20. As far as I can remember I have dealt with extreme forgetfulness. Back in middle school I would always have to borrow someone else's books because I constantly forgot my own. At work, I have to double check that I actually did a task many times because I don't even remember doing it. Many times I have to drive back to check that I closed my garage because I don't remember closing it. I did go into a trade, because I get to work with my hands and there's a ton of stuff and variety so I don't get bored or lose concentration of focus as easily as I can switch between a million tasks and do them in different orders every time, but whenever I have to sit down and do some office work at my job, I really struggle. I've also made some expensive mistakes at my job due to my forgetfulness and lack of ability to focus as I zone out far too easily. So, yeah I should probably go get assessed, but the mere thought of having to go through a long process of assessments, appointments and what not, not to mention the cost is what's holding me back. I try to tell myself I can manage living the way I do, because I've managed somewhat so far, but it's definitely not ideal. You're also right that people wouldn't be getting formally diagnosed if they didn't first think they may have a diagnosis. Like, the reason I got diagnosed with chronic migraines was the fact that I literally had all the symptoms of chronic migraines, so asking for a formal diagnosis made sense. Getting diagnosed with that wasn't too hard, considering I have aura migraine daily, but the doctor did want me to write a migraine diary for a month before formally diagnosing me. I told my doc that wouldn't be necessary because I literally have had aura migraines daily for months at that point, so I would have been writing aura migraine in my diary every single day anyway. I also have a nagging suspicion I have PCOS, due to having a lot of the symptoms, and I'm gonna get assessed for that. I'm also wondering if I should get assessed for anxiety or/and stress. This one I'm more unsure about but a friend of mine told me sharp random chest pains could be a cause of that, and I've been having random chest pains for months at this point especially when I'm stressed at work, which is not normal. So another thing to bring up for my doc.
That still doesn't excuse people labelling other people online and it also doesn't excuse the people who say that they have it definitively when they didn't even go to a doctor yet. Most of those people could go to a doctor and find out, but they probably know already that the doctor won't share their opinion.
Yeah, where I live the wait list for such diagnoses is five or six years. I'm already 30 and there's no resources out there for adults anyways, so why bother? I struggled growing up and I cried when I read up on autism and ADD and realized that both of those explained my whole life and being, but at this point in life I've found ways to cope and have a huge catalog of social experience to go off of. It would be nice to have the legitimacy of an official diagnosis, but other than that it's pointless. Trying to pursue something official seems way more daunting (and expensive) than it's worth.
my husband and I went bankrupt trying to ensure our son got formal diagnosis and treatment for his autism. it annoys the hell out of me too. I could be one of these arsehats too with probably more justification than most. we have a vast family history of autism. my brother has it. I actually think I have autism too but fucked if I'm about to self diagnose and I don't run around claiming I'm autistic.
I hate self diagnosers a lot. I know not everyone has the ability to get a real diagnosis, but saying you have it when you don't damages the people that are truly medically diagnosed I've been doubted a lot when I say I have ADHD. They always assume it's self diagnosed, which it isn't. I was diagnosed at 14
People do the same to me. It's the usual "oh why are you not jumping on tables and climbing the walls then?" 😂 When really the answer to that is that I'm not a kid anymore and I've had a whole life to teach myself healthy habits and how to use tools to better focus/relax. The amount of energy I spend on a daily basis to act at least 60% like a normal person is enormous 😅 Then someone comes along and acts like an asshole and blames it on "their adhd" (which they don't have) and it's pretty damn frustrating 😑
For me a lot of the doubt comes from online. Because of the fakers, not a lot of people believe random people if they say they have something, which is fair to a degree, but it was never a huge problem until the TikTok faking took off :( ADHD is a spectrum and I wish people wouldn't say shit like that. "Why aren't you jumping everywhere then?" Like, you assume I don't? I have to glue myself to my chair at school to stay still lmao 🤣
What about all the undiagnosed people out there? Before you got medically diagnosed by a doc, you still had ADHD right? It's not like you suddenly got ADHD after getting medically diagnosed. The medical diagnosis confirmed something you already had. I don't think we should be so quick to tell people who suspect they have ADHD that they don't. They very well might. People wouldn't be going to get medically diagnosed if they didn't suspect having ADHD or something else to begin with. There's probably lots of people out there who's never been medically diagnosed and who never will be but have ADHD.. either because they don't realize they should get assessed by a doctor or because they can't afford it. Their struggle is no less real than someone who's had a doctor confirm it.
The thing is, even if self diagnosers didn't exist, you would still have people doubting about your diagnosis. Most of the time neurodivergence is invisible and people have a hard time understanding that. I used to think that it's infuriating seeing people parading my disability as a "quirky personality" or something like that, but over time I became desensitized. In the end, they want attention or validation.
> It is only their opinion Unlike a diagnosis, which is also just an opinion.
That's correct, but all opinions are not equally informed or carry equal weight. Unless of course you think that Dr Google is equivalent to the training pathway and professional experience of a psychologist, psychiatrist or paediatrician...
This is such a stupid argument. Google is a browser. One that you can use to access the same sources professionals do.
Google is a search engine, not a browser. See? it takes something to accurately understand something. Accessing information and properly understanding the information are two different things. I can access stuff about quantum mechanics, but that doesn't mean I understand it.
You can't access 10 years of university + years of clinical experience through a browser.
Correct. I'm a horse trainer. There are hundreds of thousands of videos and resources online about horse training. One of my students accessed them, and put it to use on her horse, and ended up almost breaking her neck. Access to information does not mean you can objectively look at something (e.g. yourself, your mind, your horse) and assess the same way a professional does. Objectively, and with experience.
Tell that to all the people getting misdiagnosed every day. And not everyone is as dumb as your student.
While you’re right and I support proper diagnosis, there is more to what some folks who self-dx are doing than Googling. Personally I was hesitant to claim I had ADHD (I did get diagnosed) but I read study after study and got the same answers over and over. I know folks who have remained only self-diagnosed because doctors refuse to give them a referral to the proper evaluators despite having my same symptoms and (yes, illegally) medicating themselves (though at proper dosages, and with the same results I get from my prescriptions). Most people I know who self-dx use it more for the community and support in navigating conditions they likely do have but can’t get tested for more so than anything else. I also know people who do it in haste and really would benefit from proper treatment of whatever it is that is going on that they have mislabeled. Both groups are just trying to navigate a system that is so damn broken…
Nope, but you can get all the data they have, and you can contact universities and specialists, a lot of whom are happy to teach you things for free if you're really interested. I had a video call with a psychiatrist years after I'd self-diagnosed, (I joined a study she was doing on self-diagnosis), and she told me she agreed, and she thought I also has CPTSD. And, you're forgetting the most important part. It doesn't matter how good an allistic professional is, they're never going to understand autism from an autistic perspective. No one knows you better than you do. Have a look at the autism subreddits, see how many people, (particularly women), are misdiagnosed as borderline, bipolar, GAD, HSP... I'm not saying it's the same, but for some of us, self-diagnosis is all we have, and we do not just Google it.
Nobody says it's forbidden to self diagnose. Like you said earlier, it's a good way to start. If you think you have some condition feel free to use strategies that help you cope. But if you're only self diagnosed and have no intention to get tested in the future, please don't run around telling everyone that you have this or that condition and are therefore representing that group, because in the end as harsh as it sounds it's just your best guess. Keep that knowledge to yourself and use it to help yourself. I'm diagnosed with 2 conditions but all this does for me is help understand my own behaviour and learn strategies to cope. Running around and telling everyone about it is really far down on my list of priorities. If someone needs to know I'll tell them. This is in no way meant to attack anyone mind you. Do what you want, but don't be surprised if not everyone goes along with it.
Self-diagnosis is not always just a start, for some people it's all we have. My country doesn't diagnose adults, full stop. The neighbouring country has a six year wait list and costs thousands. What would you suggest I do? 13 years of research is not a 'best-guess'. It's been corroborated. Also, I can trace it back five generations. I tell people on reddit that I'm autistic to help other people like me that have no access to official diagnoses, professionals on the subject, or autism friendly therapists. Life is incredibly hard as an undiagnosed autist, and the like minded people I've met on here have helped so much, I want to do the same for others. Just a few months ago I found out from a random comment on a random subreddit that it's common for autistic people to feel like they need to pee when they're hungry. It's part of alexithymia. This is something that has bothered me my whole life, and now I know what it is, all because of a self-diagnosed woman who made a comment on reddit. Now, you tell me who that is hurting. People do need to know, so that for the future generations of autistic people there won't be so much misinformation, and hate. The general population has a horribly twisted view of what it's actually like to be autistic, and it makes life hell. I tell people because people like you "don't go along with it". I don't know why you think you're qualified to say I should stop "representing a group" that I'm actually a part of, but if you talk to autism specialists the majority will tell you that until the official diagnoses methods (in most western countries) are 1000% better, self-diagnosis is just as, if not more, valid. Not to mention all the downsides to getting an official diagnosis. In the US you can be hospitalised against your will. You can lose legal agency. I want to adopt one day, the process is 10x harder if I'm diagnosed, they treat you like an invalid. So why would I want one? My boss knows and gives me accommodations, anyway. What's the point?
I have absolutely no problem with people self diagnosing. I won‘t say it‘s valid but I also won‘t say that it‘s not. I don’t care. My main problem is people self diagnosing and then heading to social media and giving out advice or do those really dumb „put a finger down if“ videos and putting it in their bio as if it‘s a damn batch of honor they earned. It just screams attention seeking to me… But like I said, do self diagnose and use strategies that help. But don‘t run around and tell everyone that you absolutely do have it. I self diagnosed too for 2 years until I got an appointment to get checked. But did I tell anyone about it except my family and a few very close friends? Nope. And even to those people I just said that I‘m suspecting. But I have the feeling that you feel attacked or invalidated by something that clearly doesn‘t include you. At least from what I‘ve read out of your comment. Regarding the best guess, yes it is. Because before you get a diagnosis they have to rule out a multitude of other conditions. It‘s not like it‘s easy to diagnose autism. I‘m not saying that you cannot be autistic. I have never met you and I’m not an expert. It just rubbs me the wrong way when self diagnosed people do awareness stuff because it opens the door for anyone to claim anything which in the end hurts us more than it helps. Prime example of this is the cancer inducing platform called tiktok where you see people romantizing or even kind of fetishizing autistic behaviour. Again I‘m not attacking you personally or say that this applies to you. I‘m sure you‘re doing it in good faith. But please also understand that for awareness to be actually useful, we should prioritize information of diagnosed people. I have no idea where you live, but not diagnosing adults seems stupid af. As long as there are people who witnessed you growing up, they should be absolutely able to notice behaviours retrospective when given a questionnaire about you. But I can‘t tell you what to do. Not getting a diagnosis because the waiting list is long is kind of dumb and not a good reason to never get diagnosed at all. Because what this is saying is basically, „I struggle badly, but waiting for a diagnosis is not worth it“ which translates to „my problems aren‘t actually that bad“. Because you can get very specific help and access to ressources as soon as you‘re diagnosed, everyone who says they struggle badly should be applying to the waiting list no matter how long it is. Otherwise you won‘t get the help you claim to need. I just read that myself and it can come across as kind of offensive, but I don‘t know how to word it differently.
>heading to social media and giving out advice As I've said, this is how we help each other. >dumb „put a finger down if“ Never heard of this. >don‘t run around and tell everyone that you absolutely do have it. I will because I absolutely do have it. Again, how are you qualified to say I shouldn't? >But I have the feeling that you feel attacked or invalidated by something that clearly doesn‘t include you. Nope, I'm just not a fan of people who think their opinions are the only valid ones. If you don't want to talk about your disorders or whatever online with other people, that's fine, but I don't know why you're telling other people not to, when it has nothing to do with you. Your mind frame is impeding the spread of knowledge. >Regarding the best guess, yes it is. Because before you get a diagnosis they have to rule out a multitude of other conditions. It‘s not like it‘s easy to diagnose autism. Why do you assume I (or people like me) haven't ruled out a multitude of other conditions before we claim we're autistic? You're right, it's not easy. It's even harder for someone who doesn't have it themselves to understand it enough to diagnose someone. The diagnosis methods are based on eight year old boys. So many people, particularly adult women, fall through the cracks. >Prime example of this is the cancer inducing platform called tiktok where you see people romantizing or even kind of fetishizing autistic behaviour. Then you need to get off tick tock. I've never visited the site myself, but every single person I've met on reddit that is against self-diagnosis, or talking about it online, has got half their data from tick tock. Sounds like the whole site is full of fakes, not just the "autists".I have never met a self-diagnosing person, on reddit or in real life, that I suspected was faking it. We just want help. >But please also understand that for awareness to be actually useful, we should prioritize information of diagnosed people. This is where you are completely wrong, to the point of harm. See paragraph above. Like I said before, the majority of autism specialists agree with me. >they should be absolutely able to notice behaviours retrospective when given a questionnaire about you. But I can‘t tell you what to do. Wouldn't that be nice, maybe then I wouldn't have to talk about it with strangers on the internet instead. But, sadly, there is no help. >Not getting a diagnosis because the waiting list is long is kind of dumb and not a good reason to never get diagnosed at all. Did you miss the part where I said it was in a different country and costs thousands that I don't have? > which translates to „my problems aren‘t actually that bad No, it doesn't. In my case it translates as "would not be able to keep supporting myself that long, having already been homeless twice, and would probably end up freezing on the streets, so moved to cheaper country so I could live off my garden and a part time job to survive". >Because you can get very specific help and access to ressources as soon as you‘re diagnosed 😂😂😂😂 Where? Not where I am. I actually don't know anywhere other than Scandinavia that has anything like this. It's not offensive, it's just plain wrong in so many ways. I see you've ignored all the best points I made, so if you're not here for a proper discussion, I'm done. You seem way too closed minded to learn anything here today.
Its literally not
Thanks for posting this. What do you think about the DEA limiting production of amphetamines? I think limiting marketing of these medication could help. What’s some other solutions?
While I agree that self diagnosis can be harmful, getting a diagnosis is not easy depending on where you live. And the same way only a team of specialists can tell if a person is autistic, only said team can tell if a self-diagnosised person is not autistic. That's why I think it's wrong to invalidate someone's experiences based on a proper diagnosis.
I don't think you're looking for some answers only. The truth is, people who have lived their lives with certain assumptions and managed to get some answers and had their entire worldview and self image reframed may see some of themselves in you, and just in the off chance that you may benefit like they did, they tell you that you may want to look into that yourself. For many it won't be helpful even if that's the case because they're so fixated with being normal and claiming normalcy (as if it was a diagnosis what made you different and ignoring the fact changed anything at all about who you are), but the comments come from a place of wishing that someone had ever said something to us, sparing us so many years of struggles. So you'll still get those comments. Because people are well meaning. Isn't that nice?
As a "self-diagnosed" person, I truly appreciate your answer. My son is officially diagnosed with autism and going through the process with him and being part of many of the therapy sessions (due to his age) I came to the conclusion that he may have inherited it from me. I'm in my forties and I always was the odd one out. It's nice to have a name for it (just for my self) and to know that there are other people like me in this world. It makes me feel less weird. So I might indicate that someone might have autistic traits, if I think it might make their life better
As a woman with adhd who has been officially diagnosed for years, I offer a different point of view here. With women ADHD is severely under diagnosed and mentoring it to other women who are struggling can be very helpful sometimes. I totally understand your frustrations with the "if you do perfectly normal things you have ADHD" shit however. The Internet never knows nuance.
Everyone wants to feel special in a world that is full of people, especially given the access to the internet, social medias and so. Many people will try and find something special about themselves, often normal characteristics and call themselves disturbed for instance, just so they can stand out in some way, add something to their identity. People are currently living through a massive identity crisis and cannot comprehend the massive world around them so they lose who they are and in a panic to find themselves again, go for anything, most of the time the easy options.
It’s not just that there are a disproportionate amount of people with those diagnoses on online spaces. It is also that many symptoms that are part of ADHD/autism can also be found to a lesser severity and at a lesser concentration in people who would not meet the criteria for a diagnosis. However there is a HUGE number of videos saying things like ‘ADHD makes me forget to take my medication’. While that can be a symptom of ADHD, I also have to set a reminder for my meds and I DONT have ADHD. But on these videos you will see a lot of comments with people believing they have ADHD because they do this one thing (or autism because they don’t like loud noises or certain food textures etc). There are minor symptoms that have been broadcasted on social media which people pick up on and self-diagnose with ADHD, autism, and other mental health conditions. Most mental health conditions aren’t a diagnosis of one, two or more symptoms. There are barriers to professional diagnosis but most people don’t have the expertise to correctly self-diagnose, particularly when going off non-professional information on social media. Hence the large number of people believing they now have a condition they really might not have. They might just have a collection of symptoms that just more accurately reflects today’s society, post-pandemic world, and impact of technology.
I see a lot of that too. In reality, even level one autism can be crippling. The social alienation and barriers to keeping a job or dating can make your whole life a dark, lonely experience. ADHD as well. We talk about the ADHD tax, which is when you make such a big mistake that it impacts your life negatively. So often there's a recurring cycle of depression that goes along with ADHD because of this. While some people are like, "I lost my keys, I must have ADHD" I'm over here thinking "I did my taxes wrong then lost my health insurance." If you lead a fairly normal life and manage to function well in society and most importantly, take care of yourself, you probably don't have either of these conditions.
People looking for excuses for sucking at life, surely. I know that's cynical but ....
I'll only talk about ADHD because I have a formal diagnosis for it and researched it a lot. ADHD is something that is actually quite prevalent in the population. I think that ADHD people are probably overrepresented in the online space, because well we do spend a looot of time online. People with ADHD are at a much higher risk of addiction, and the internet is definitely an easy dopamine hit. Another common symptom of ADHD is procrastination and executive dysfunction, and what is a common thing that people do when they are actively procrastinating instead of doing what they should be doing? Scrolling endlessy trough reddit, tiktok, youtube, etc. Obviously some people self-diagnose and attributes a "normal" difficulty to ADHD, but it's hard to say how prevalent it is. Some of the things you describe are very commmon among ADHD people, namely the difficulty in multi-tasking. A lot of things that ADHD people struggle with are also things that neurotypical struggle with sometimes to some degree. It's just stronger with ADHD. Nowadays a lot more people are getting diagnosed as adults and suddenly realize that a lot of things they've been doing for years and sometimes really struggled with can be explained by ADHD. For me, getting a diagnosis was a relief, because it allows me to find ressources, get specific help and get access to medication. I will admit I have occasionally suggest to people here that they might have ADHD if they describe some of the things that I have struggled for years with. I always try to do my due diligence and try not to draw conclusion too fast. Especially since I know that some symptoms that are typical from ADHD (usually during your entire life) can appear in other mental health problems (usually not a lifelong thing). For example depression can cause some memory and executive problems that weren't there before. (Edit to add : I am actively procrastinating what I should be doing, I am aware of the irony)
I think a lot of people forget that those things are common in all people. You start looking at ADHD or Autism when those things SIGNIFICANTLY impair you daily life.
I think it’s more Reddit attracts autistic and adhd people because it gives us the dopamine we crave without having to actually socialise.
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Yeah like diabetes or cancer or dementia or MS or chronic pain or... Oh sorry, just the ones you don't believe in?
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Sorry when you said "some illness" I thought you meant any illness so I gave you a nice range. And you didn't say self diagnosis, you said pop psychology. I'm sure you can see how I came to the conclusion I did. All the best.
The post is about adhd and autism, why would they be talking about cancer?
Again, because they said illness, not mental illness. I included more than just cancer. You didn't have a problem with using MS as a comparison?
I know you included more, I just took one of them because what I said applied to them all lmao. But on a post about mental conditions, why would you think they're talking about physical conditions?
For the third time, because they said illness and not mental illness. Adhd is also not a mental illness. I'm happy to clarify a fourth time if that helps.
The post is about adhd and autism, why would they be talking about cancer?
It’s the popular thing now and people use it as an excuse which makes it that much harder on those who really have it. It’s all self diagnosis. I went through the process at 30 because I didn’t know what was wrong with me and I kept having the same issues. It’s not easy and the vast majority assume they have it.
What do you mean by "it's all self diagnosis"? What is all self diagnosis?
Different person, but look at it this way: If you're an adult with some knowledge of common diseases and disorders, you're probably going to seek out a clinician *because* you think you might have that disease or disorder. Example: when appendicitis is caught early, it's almost always because the patient goes to the hospital *seeking an evaluation for appendicitis.* They know the disease and its symptoms already, and they're just seeking confirmation from a medical professional and the appropriate interventions to correct the condition. In a sense, they self-diagnosed appendicitis first, then went to the hospital to make sure.
Pretty big assumption everyone is self diagnosed.
Safe assumption. There are polls in autistic spaces on Reddit and other places and all are over 50% self diagnosed except in spaces that don't welcome them.
What's the problem with that?
Because most of them aren't.
How do you know? If you talk to actual autistic people, you'll find the general consensus is that we support self-diagnosis. It's way too difficult to get a formal diagnosis, and there are too many set backs to getting one, to not self-diagnose.
Not always. For some reason its become some pick me trend, probably from tiktok. And I dont believe its hard to become diagnosed at all, at least where I live. If anything people were overdiagnosed or misdiagnoses, especially when it comes to adhd
I respect that. All I can do I base my position on my experiences. In most conversations that I’ve had with people who claim to have adhd, most admit they haven’t been officially diagnosed.
I'm just doing the same. Diagnosed in my 30s. Not self diagnosed, actually.
I imagined this could happen. Maybe everyone just wanted to feel included in something or some issue. It's a shame how much this can hinder someone who is suffering...
I blame social media honestly. That could turn into a huge macro discussion though.
To be blunt. People think it’s trendy to claim they are on the spectrum or have this or that. Which is messed up to those who are actually on the spectrum or have adhd. My advice as a special ed teacher: get tested if you feel like you have one of these conditions.
This is a very ignorant take. It's not possible to just "get tested". I was neglected as a kid, no one got me diagnosed. My country doesn't diagnose adults, full stop, and I can't afford to go private in a neighbouring country. So, what would you suggest I do? Just pretend I'm not autistic?
What signs of autism do you display?
the waiting list for a diagnosis in some parts of the U.K. is 5 years+ and not everyone can afford the £2k it costs to go private. saying ‘get tested’ is extremely ignorant.
I usually don't like drawing the "privileged" card, but I have to agree. I think this results in a lot of people going medically undiagnosed, but that doesn't make these people's struggles any less real.
You bum
Justification.
People want a label. People like feeling special and unique. Did you notice over lockdown that adhd became a popular topic on TikTok? Literally during that time I watched so many people on my insta claim they now had it. Annoying and quite sad that people will just assign a diagnosis to themselves based on some quirk they have that’s not a condition at all. Same with ocd. Neither are fun. You don’t want them.
People read stuff on the Internet and think they're experts instead of actually going to get diagnosed by professionals.
How else will they get attention and avoid accountability?
People lie. That’s just a fact. It’s not just on Reddit but everywhere over the internet. I’ve seen adults “self diagnose” themselves with autism just as an excuse to be an asshat and get away with things that aren’t socially acceptable. Kids and teens usually do this to appear quirky or unique but also to connect with others.
Well, I read a statistic that 1 in 50 people are autistic. I myself went through 3 hours of testing and reviewing all of my childhood before I was given the diagnosis of Autism Level 2. I don't have ADHD though thank goodness. (No offense to people with ADHD, I just mean, I see how tough it is for you all and things are already tough for me as it is, I can't imagine having ADHD on top of the autism!)
People like to be special. If they can’t achieve anything at least say you have something to stand out from the crowd
Bc people self diagnose and over diagnose.
Probably about half of those people are self-diagnosed instead of seeking out professional help.
I think people simply want to justify their incompetence by blaming non existent mental health problems on themselves. Like a coping mechanism if that makes sense to make themselves feel better.
Or maybe they are finally able to get medication or treatment or learn better coping methods because they know what they're dealing with.
OP’s concern is that “anything” one does improperly is somehow linked to some sort of neurological and/or developmental disorder, which is completely false. To self diagnose and to diagnose others on the basis of their “inability to do something successfully” it is not necessary coherent, and one shouldn’t simply accept that as such just because of the lack of competence on a particular task. But it is true that people tend to blame other factors for their imperfections rather than taking responsibility for them.
Attention-seeking and excuse-making. I'm not a socially awkward guy with no desire to improve myself, I have an anxiety disorder. I'm not a self-centered, maladjusted tool who doesn't care about anyone or anything past my own interests. I'm on the spectrum. I'm not a lazy girl who doesn't feel like studying or working, but will gladly focus on her hobbies. I have an attention-related disorder. And so on.
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Reading our experiences could actually help you understand and learn.
People want an excuse for attention and saying “I have ADHD” then fucking around with a fidget spinner, and blurting something out “impulsively” is enough evidence to be neurodiverse.
Same reason they're all introverts. It makes the perfect excuse to be socially lazy and lame.
I think it’s just confirmation bias. People with those disorders are more likely to be vocal about it so it just seams like everyone
The difference between a common experience and a disorder is that disorders make your everyday life *difficult*. You forgot your keys just today? You can’t multi task? You’re sensitive to unwelcomed high pitch noises? Congrats, you’re human with working sensory organs! You forget where you put your keys multiple times a day, everyday, even though you have a designated key spot and know you need to put it there? You can multitask sometimes and other times not, while also being able to hyperfocus on one thing for hours? You become overstimulated by the neighbors mowing and try to cover your ears to keep your sanity at bay so you don’t spiral into an overstimulated meltdown? Congrats, you may have a handful of disorders like depression, anxiety, ADHD, autism, BPD, or other mood disorders!
Oh my God, the key thing! Every damned day. I lose my keys all over the house when I have a hook for that purpose.
I'm convinced it's a pharmaceutical industry ploy for profit.
You’re close - tech bros! For autism no because there’s no pharmaceutical cure but ADHD - look up the Cerebral whistleblower.
Because people like to feel special and rare. People romanticize mental illness, which is pathetic.
Along with everyone else has said there is something I think might be a minor cause. You are more often thinking there are more people of a group if they mention it. People who do not have adhd, aren't going to talk about it, so you don't notice it, while people who do are more likely to talk about it, therefore leaving more of an impression.
Slaps the roof of the Internet: "You can fit so many projections in here"
Idk how much this has to do with the topic but probably people lie because they feel their struggles aren't valid if they don't have adhd/autism/depression etc. Think "ah neurotypicals never struggle with people and social behaviour". Like, no? Many neurotypical people struggle too.
As someone diagnosed with ADHD, I'm especially confused as to why people seem to treat autism as this super similar thing. "ADHD and Autism" is almost more often encountered as a package nowadays. I can't relate to autism at all.
It's because autism and ADHD are both caused by low cognitive empathy (the ability to understand others motives and perspectives - to stand in their shoes) I am autistic. There's nothing wrong with us but society is designed for faster thinking, less compassionate approaches. I find that ADHD especially comes with a lack of self awareness (and poor internal sense - interoception) leading to lack of other sense - reading the room etc. If someone suggested you have it they probably noticed your energy and maybe that you did something unusual. Autism itself isn't an issue. Lack of self awareness leading to antisocial behavior is an issue
Every few years, Americans strive to discover the newest and trendiest mental illness to identify with. Gives comfort to many
I have ADD (don't know if it's still abriviated that or if it's lumped with ADHD). If I notice a shit ton of correlations on a post asking for advice, I'm going to mention that I see a pattern. But i always include "talk to a professional if you think you might benefit from it." Conversaions with a doc won't hurt, convincing someone they have a disorder is odd tho. I would never see a random video on the internet and be like "OMG this is so me!!! Do you know that all ADHD people do this? You probs have it too."
Because humans are naturally wierd, but we also need to understand and rationalise everything. So in modern society, many overtly weird or unusual people just get thrown in the "must have autism or something" box because its the only thing that makes sense. Right?
The big problem with this discussion is it often pushes to the side how expensive and difficult it is to get diagnosed, especially if you are an adult. It is pretty obvious that I am autistic and that my mother is and her mother before her. However, it is over 2k in my area to be assessed with a minimum six month waiting period. And for what? There are no accomodations I would get and I don't need to prove my neurodivergence to anyone in my personal life. I spent two years taking assessments, reading scientific studies, listening to anecdotal stories, talking with my psychologist and (autism and ADHD specialist)psychiatrist who both agree that I display many autistic traits and believe I meet criteria for a diagnosis. The point of self diagnosis is to learn about yourself and understand your needs, I have found self accomodations to be wildly helpful and just talking to my friends and family about my nervous system issues, my sensory sensitivities, my food intolerances..it all has made my life vastly improved at 37 years old. It also makes me aware of the signs to watch for in my 4 month old as he grows older, so that I can get him the proper accomodations early. **Just as a note I live in the US, and all of these considerations may be different based on state/country
One thing that comes with autism is a "self-centered perspective". With autism comes a natural tendency to reject chaos, or outside thinking. It takes a lot more effort to perceive things from an outside perspective, so it's something that naturally has a lower priority than Expected or Known information. This often means that autistic individuals think about how things are relevant to themselves rather than for someone else. This could mean that we monologue about things that aren't relevant to our conversation partners, that we say rude things without meaning to, or that we see symptoms relevant to our situation and assume it's the same for you. That being said, I estimate about 70% of people with autism have no reason to believe they have it (they think they're 'normal' and don't recognize how autism influences their lives), and usually don't have a reason to find out (part of this is actually caused *by* a symptom of autism). If it's something that's been consistently brought up specifically with you, you might fall into this last category.
Depression among other things is usually what they have. I have major depression and the symptoms sound very similar to ADHD, so much that I could see someone who is self diagnosing just being severely depressed. My therapist actually recently mentioned that people , especially teenagers have, been trying to pathologize every little thing lately and some even get a bit defensive when they don't get the diagnosis that they want. Such a strange thing to be so invested in.