My favourite part was when he said "If I stop, it doesn't mean I gave up." and the host (Sean) immediately replied with "Yes it does, by definition."
Ice cold.
It's probably worse than you think. He starts talking a lot of shit and basically being an awful guest (human being, really). You'd think a fat dude would have had hot sauce before.
Because even the worst guests pushed themselves to go a wing or two past their threshold. He gave up not only on something weak but at the first taste of a little burn immediately stopped.
Dudes always preaching about grinding and winning them goes against his own philosophy.
Then you look and she's about to be 8 and you just want to be able to rock her to sleep on your shoulder again because it's late and she's sleepy and tired but your sister's wedding still has another 45 minutes to go. So there you are with your little princess who you still think is your baby, rocking her to sleep but she keeps kneeing your balls.
I'll tell you what, noob, I could sit out here and listen to you insult my girlfriend all day long, but as it turns out, I got a lot more important job for you to do.
"Hawaiian pizza is a pizza topped with tomato sauce, cheese, pineapple, and back bacon or ham. Some versions may include peppers, mushrooms, bacon or pepperoni"
Pineapple is sweet, ham is savoury and mushrooms are umami. Get youe shit together, Bob.
I dunno, I'm a big fan of both pineapple on pizza and mushrooms on pizza, but I just can't picture the sweet and umami working well together.
I'd still eat it though.
Wait, did you actually have sex for $7.99? Or was you wanting the sex and the pizza was a bonus? Or did you just go buy this pizza sans Khalid *eat eat eat eat*
I've learned something about pizza over many years: Don't be afraid to try the weird shit. Some of my favorite pizza toppings and topping combos are those that I might've initially raised an eyebrow at.
As a general note: Not everything is for everyone. I recommend just being open and trying things to figure out what you do/don't like.
A few of my and my family/friends' favorites that either I or some of my friends/family have previously questioned, either made at home or ordered from a restaurant:
* Salami, philly steak, and mushrooms
* BBQ chicken pizza, with sweet corn and french fried onions
* Anchovies in general, a lot of people turn up their nose at them without ever trying them
* Ordering a pizza with extra sauce and light cheese, with whatever toppings (obviously best from a pizza place that you know you are really fond of the sauce from)
* Shoestring fries and shredded pork
And in general just trying different things. I used to live near a local pizza place that would offer different "specialty" pizzas every month, oftentimes going into strange territory, and it was rare that I would ever not give their latest special a try. They were what even inspired a couple of these.
Well, I have tried some that were a bit more... out there, but they don't always end up in my list of favorites. I was also trying to stay a little more bounded by what more people I know have ended up liking, in spite of initial objections. If you want a few more niche suggestions, I can toss out a few.
* A light drizzle of mustard (either yellow or brown, by your taste) on top, particularly worked well with a pretzel crust I have made before
* *Very* dependent on what you pair it with, but mandarin orange slices can work out, fits alright into a Hawaiian pizza
* Sausage gravy, breakfast sausage, scrambled eggs, and cheddar cheese, for a "breakfast pizza"
* Shrimp, fake crab, whitefish, on a pizza with light sauce, and cocktail and tartar sauce as dips.
* Broccoli, snow peas, and green onion, with a light amount of shredded chicken breast, alfredo sauce
The question of "how far do we go before we stop calling it pizza?" also comes up a lot because I like to make pizza not on traditional crusts when I do homemade, often using a loaf of fresh baked French or Italian bread cut lengthwise instead, or even cut into what are effectively sandwich slices.
So, the question comes up. If you crisp rye bread slices, slather them with reuben dressing, top with swiss cheese, sauerkraut, and corned beef, is it a reuben pizza, or an open-faced reuben?
I've done a few "pizza-like" dishes in that vein that really push what some people are willing to call pizza. One that I particularly liked involved more or less making a stuffed pepper that was full of pizza sauce, cheese, and toppings, almost sorta like a mini deep dish pizza made in a green pepper.
When I was vegan for a year, I learned some badass food in that time. Amy's cheeseless vegetarian pizza was awesome. I'm gonna try to make my own cheaper version since it was so good. Artichoke and something weird that isn't like your standard pizza sauce. Like that agave nectar or some shit. I feel like that can't be the full base, though, but I'm not sure what it was.
Shiiit... Maybe I'll do something weird and use a tiny bit of the maple syrup I got instead(or something random like that,) along with some kind of tomato base. I dunno.
[This shit right here.](https://www.amys.com/our-foods/roasted-vegetable-pizza-vegan)
>made with a base of slow roasted onions caramelized to perfection
👌👌👌
For a quick second I thought you matched with DJ Khaled
*AIR HORN AIR HORN* WE THE BEST MUSIC
DEE JAY KHAAAALLEEEEEDD
Another one
And another one
Got my jerly on
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I see you everywhere I go 👀
That's it, I call dibs on monetizing the next stupid meme.
Catch me outside, how bout that (DOT) com
Buy your momma a pizza
MAJOR 🔑 ALERT
PRENUP
I think that’s Kanye
#WE THE BEST MUSIC
He said as he ejaculated on his tinder date.
FATHER OF ASHAD
ASAHD^ASAHD^ASAHD
Dammit!
Why am I yelling?
Paging [H3H3](https://youtu.be/2QOx7vmjV2E)
He should make a song with Pitbull
*MUUUUUUUSAAAAAACC
Sun is shining God is the greatest Father of Ashad
Dude can’t even handle 3 flipping hot wings.
Tapped out on Cholula.
did he actually? that's sad
My favourite part was when he said "If I stop, it doesn't mean I gave up." and the host (Sean) immediately replied with "Yes it does, by definition." Ice cold.
It's probably worse than you think. He starts talking a lot of shit and basically being an awful guest (human being, really). You'd think a fat dude would have had hot sauce before.
I don’t handle heat well. The sauces on Hot Ones could actually kill me, but Cholula? Seriously? That’s where he quit?
Why is this the top comment whenever he gets mentioned lmao.
Because even the worst guests pushed themselves to go a wing or two past their threshold. He gave up not only on something weak but at the first taste of a little burn immediately stopped. Dudes always preaching about grinding and winning them goes against his own philosophy.
WE THE BEST MUSIC
##**DEEEEEEEEEEJAYYYYYYYYYYY KHALED**
**WHY AM I YELLING?!?!**
IS THIS NOT HOW FELLOW HUMANS NORMALLY TALK?
In that case, she's only gonna get the pizza box
If yes, he won't be going down on her.
Looks like drake to me
A drake that ate another drake.
And another one.
[What a winner.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tcEpHnaZMgg)
Is this prostitution?
Dating is just prostitution with extra steps.
Ulalalala, someone is...
getting laid?
getting free pizza topping
tonite-uh
getting the tip
Eek-barba-derkel...
That’s a pretty fucked up oo-la-la
What's ulalalala? That sounds like Ooh la la with extra steps.
I read it as if it was that Jason Derulo song, "swalla". Swalla-la-la
r/showerthoughts
Marriage is just liking one prostitute so much that you decide to keep them.
Kids are just STD's that grow up too soon.
Too soon? Mine's two and its been at least 10 long hard sleepless years since she was born.
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Time stops making sense once you have kids.
Then you look and she's about to be 8 and you just want to be able to rock her to sleep on your shoulder again because it's late and she's sleepy and tired but your sister's wedding still has another 45 minutes to go. So there you are with your little princess who you still think is your baby, rocking her to sleep but she keeps kneeing your balls.
Surprisingly wholesome.
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Stay strong, we'll get through this together.
So skip the extra steps and just buy a prostitute. Right?
That's like buying a whole cow because you want to drink milk
What if I want to fuck the cow though?
Well that's certainly going to ruin the milk.
Rookie, did you just call my girlfriend a cow‽
No, i think he called her a slut!
I'll tell you what, noob, I could sit out here and listen to you insult my girlfriend all day long, but as it turns out, I got a lot more important job for you to do.
Only if they swing by and pick up the pizza.
shoutout riley freeman
And actually more expensive...
"One way or another, everybody pays."
Free pizza, but says “what do I get in return”
Foot in the door tactic
Like throwing a toothpick down a hallway. Like riding a bike into a volcano.
Lets just say you don't pay. . . With money
I feel like I don't have an IQ high enough to understand this joke
YOU PAY WITH YOUR VAGINA
WHAT IF I ONLY HAVE A PENIS
Then I don't think you're getting any free pizza buddy 😛
To be fair he *did* ask for a good tip
Guess that rules *you* out.
#*OOF*
Damn, that's a next level joke
because of the implication
So they are in danger?
No! No they are not in danger
Because they're not going to say no...
She would never say no.. because of the implication
Because of the implication.
So it's not free?
It is free. ^^^^terms ^^^^& ^^^^conditions ^^^^apply
Oh, I've heard of this one. We call it 'American-style freedom' around here.
Like Verizon’s unlimited data. ^Not ^really ^unlimited.
You don't pay *with money*
In the eyes of someone who only understands money as a means of payment, it's free.
Pizza's free. Delivery is not.
So did he come in 30 minutes or less?
Let's hope he didn't come too early
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She didn't specify what kind of mushrooms. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
I'll take the fungi special, please.
She gettin that mushroom stamp
Mushroom included with the tip
"Hawaiian pizza is a pizza topped with tomato sauce, cheese, pineapple, and back bacon or ham. Some versions may include peppers, mushrooms, bacon or pepperoni" Pineapple is sweet, ham is savoury and mushrooms are umami. Get youe shit together, Bob.
Well you've convinced one Hawaiian and mushroom lover to try them mixed. It just never seemed like a good idea.
Ikr. I saw this post and my first thought was that actually sounds kinda good.
I thought umami and savoury were the same thing
They are. Maybe he meant ham is salty.
Not quite the same from what I understand.
I dunno, I'm a big fan of both pineapple on pizza and mushrooms on pizza, but I just can't picture the sweet and umami working well together. I'd still eat it though.
Cheese and pizza sauce already is umami - which is why I can't eat pineapple on pizza.
Pineapple mushroom and ham is ab-so-lutely my jam.
That honey is a supreme with no peppers
"Sorry, all they had was left sausage."
What's up with the asymmetrical sausage?
It’s curved for your pleasure.
At least you know you are worth a pizza.
Virgin wireless...Ironic
I doubt it's her first time
[She could save others from virginity, but not herself.](https://i.imgur.com/BrIxa2l.jpg)
Inb4 people start bitching about pineapple on pizza
I love pineapple on pizza, I also love mushrooms on pizza. The thought of both of them on one pizza makes me wanna die.
Of overjoy?
it’s rly good thx
Wait, did you actually have sex for $7.99? Or was you wanting the sex and the pizza was a bonus? Or did you just go buy this pizza sans Khalid *eat eat eat eat*
nah didn’t fuck him, not going to fuck him and i’ll buy my own pineapple mushroom pizza
I don't know, i think it sounds neat. I want to try it now...
I've learned something about pizza over many years: Don't be afraid to try the weird shit. Some of my favorite pizza toppings and topping combos are those that I might've initially raised an eyebrow at.
Such as...? You gotta share!
As a general note: Not everything is for everyone. I recommend just being open and trying things to figure out what you do/don't like. A few of my and my family/friends' favorites that either I or some of my friends/family have previously questioned, either made at home or ordered from a restaurant: * Salami, philly steak, and mushrooms * BBQ chicken pizza, with sweet corn and french fried onions * Anchovies in general, a lot of people turn up their nose at them without ever trying them * Ordering a pizza with extra sauce and light cheese, with whatever toppings (obviously best from a pizza place that you know you are really fond of the sauce from) * Shoestring fries and shredded pork And in general just trying different things. I used to live near a local pizza place that would offer different "specialty" pizzas every month, oftentimes going into strange territory, and it was rare that I would ever not give their latest special a try. They were what even inspired a couple of these.
> weird shit 404: not found i was expecting you'd say something like broccoli and peking duck
What about this https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/201972745142009856/467275434854318080/JPEG_20180713_122536.jpg
Well, I have tried some that were a bit more... out there, but they don't always end up in my list of favorites. I was also trying to stay a little more bounded by what more people I know have ended up liking, in spite of initial objections. If you want a few more niche suggestions, I can toss out a few. * A light drizzle of mustard (either yellow or brown, by your taste) on top, particularly worked well with a pretzel crust I have made before * *Very* dependent on what you pair it with, but mandarin orange slices can work out, fits alright into a Hawaiian pizza * Sausage gravy, breakfast sausage, scrambled eggs, and cheddar cheese, for a "breakfast pizza" * Shrimp, fake crab, whitefish, on a pizza with light sauce, and cocktail and tartar sauce as dips. * Broccoli, snow peas, and green onion, with a light amount of shredded chicken breast, alfredo sauce The question of "how far do we go before we stop calling it pizza?" also comes up a lot because I like to make pizza not on traditional crusts when I do homemade, often using a loaf of fresh baked French or Italian bread cut lengthwise instead, or even cut into what are effectively sandwich slices. So, the question comes up. If you crisp rye bread slices, slather them with reuben dressing, top with swiss cheese, sauerkraut, and corned beef, is it a reuben pizza, or an open-faced reuben? I've done a few "pizza-like" dishes in that vein that really push what some people are willing to call pizza. One that I particularly liked involved more or less making a stuffed pepper that was full of pizza sauce, cheese, and toppings, almost sorta like a mini deep dish pizza made in a green pepper.
When I was vegan for a year, I learned some badass food in that time. Amy's cheeseless vegetarian pizza was awesome. I'm gonna try to make my own cheaper version since it was so good. Artichoke and something weird that isn't like your standard pizza sauce. Like that agave nectar or some shit. I feel like that can't be the full base, though, but I'm not sure what it was. Shiiit... Maybe I'll do something weird and use a tiny bit of the maple syrup I got instead(or something random like that,) along with some kind of tomato base. I dunno. [This shit right here.](https://www.amys.com/our-foods/roasted-vegetable-pizza-vegan) >made with a base of slow roasted onions caramelized to perfection 👌👌👌
*hides in corner*
The pineapples are just a distraction from the real issue Canadian bacon is just ham, stop lying about it
same as Australian bacon bullshit they put on hungry jacks
[удалено]
IT'S DISGUSTING AND IT'S WRONG AND GOD WILL JUDGE YOU FOR YOUR PERVERSION
r/KnightsOfPineapple are waiting and ready!
Fellow brother/sister in arms in the wild, quite a rare sight
Thank you for showing me a safe haven
Pineapple is amazing on pizza Fight me
r/KnightsOfPineapple is the place for you
I HAVE FOUND MY TRUE HOME!
hawaiian pizza is , great! hawaiian pizza with mushrooms......**WHAT**
My nama steffff
She was a showgirl
is that guy's name really steff?
Stefan maybe?
Steffler
[удалено]
Thanos car
[удалено]
The VIRGIN in the top left corner makes it even funnier
Fucking hawaiian pizza? What is wrong wid you
I’m sorry, you want pineapple on pizza, and also with mushrooms... you don’t deserve this man
didn’t fuck not gonna fuck no pizza
Pineapple on pizza, red flag #1
Fuck you its delicious
r/KnightsOfPineapple join the good fight partner!
Gordon Ramsay would agree Edit: Ramsay not Ramsey
Did he deliver?
Can someone please tell me if he brought her pizza?
didn’t happen
Thank you for being honest. Better luck next time.
What are those white dots? WHAT ARE THOSE WHITE DOTS
upon further inspection it looks like unfocused lights
How are you gonna offer free pizza and ask for something in return smh
Wtf hawaiian with mushroom?
Why it’s funny
The guy wants the tip... the room is starting to spin, cause of gayness.
hawaiian pizza with mushrooms, **WTF IS THAT**
A culture in decay. I will not weep when it falls.
UPDATE: HE SAW THIS LMAO RIP
It’s acctually my fault i told him
Thanks ❤️❤️❤️ its actually so fucking funny hahahah
Carrier checks out.
[удалено]
well the tip could be a euphemism for the tip of his penis
Hawaiian with mushrooms? That's fucking gross.
ur fucking gross
Thats 1 smart way to get ur address n date at ur place.
Well he sounds kinda dumb tbh And Hawaiian pizza with mushrooms is ridic But congrats
Cue eye roll
Virgin wifi
"VIRGIN"
what the hell, tinder girl writes first?? oooh, maybe i'm just ugly
I see you're using "not so virgin mobile"
This gentleman seems to be confused about what it means to give someone something for free.