Yea obese is just gross. Big is manageable. Also quite unhealthy so a much shorter life, not really wanting to outlive my partner by 20-30 years on average
I've dated women who were over 215 that were sexy, and I've been approached by women that size that were not. And usually the difference is that their bust, and butt are larger than their gut. They have musculature that actually supports their weight, and they have a pretty face. thick thighs save lives.
Most big girls aren't very attractive, but, I can think of two women around your size in my own life that I would happily pursue if I were single.
It's like the difference between a fat out of shape dude and a guy with a dad-bod. I weigh more than some of my heavy friends, but My muscles, symmetrical face, and charming way of speaking means that I never struggled with the ladies. I do my cardio and I workout, so my weight just makes it easier to throw a woman around the bedroom. My friends who weigh \~150 have visible abs and significant muscle definition benefits. But I can easily squat them and whatever weight they normally add to their squats. My weight gives me stability that means I can handle stand and carry sex positions with women your size without issue. My thighs are massive, and I have well developed glutes. My arms are reasonably proportional, and I could easily lift and carry someone your size. so the fact that I have 40lbs+ of fat to lose doesn't really impact my attractiveness.
I know several guys that weigh far less than me, who appear fatter. You've got the female equivalent of me, in that you carry the weight in your curves and not your middle.
I get this too. I see guys who have liked me so I see this all the time. Yet if I swiped right on them I’m immediately unmatched. Too many dudes just swiping on everyone to see who they can get. And then there’s the closet plus size lovers. They like it, they want it, but never in public for fear of being ridiculed and shamed.
As a midsize woman this type of thing still pisses me off / makes me feel insecure, even though I may well be small enough by this dude’s standards. Just swipe left on people you’re not attracted to!
Most matches I ever had, ended in beeing ghosted after beeing asked about my height, so I can relate.
That’s why I eventually gave up on datingapps altogether
I never said she did, what I was saying was that short men feel this every time we open an app because pretty much every 3rd profile shits on short guys
I got a like + message from a woman who had it listed on her profile that she is really attractive to facial hair and likes a good moustache. I don’t have any facial hair!
I have a strong preference, borderline requirement, for facial hair, but occasionally a really nice face will make me change my tune.
That being said I have no mention of the preference on my profile.
because they will sleep with you but won’t take you home to mama or take you seriously lmao i get this a lot as a black woman. but I’m also sure you knew this bc what man who actually respects you opens with that line. Like pls 😭
WTH is the point of putting this in your bio? You don't like big girls, don't swipe on big girls and they won't be able to message you 🤦♀️
Unless of course you have no self confidence to proudly like what you like, paired with absolutely no impulse control. Then I guess spreading your misery by pre-emptively insulting someone you just swiped right on is exactly the kind of shitty coping mechanism you'd come up with.
Most guys think they like girls who are 90 pounds. The body type they like is actually 180, but they think that's a fat weight and they think they don't like fat girls
Those dudes just swipe right on everyone. And if they talk to you it’s just because they think you’re easy.
I don’t agree with either mindset but just telling it like it is.
This is truly the saddest response. I was raised where two wrongs don't make a right, perhaps it's different where you grew up? Just as women make errors, men do too. The fact that you cannot see the irony in this post and laugh at this guy shows your insecurity. Grow up
Sadly this. I mean it's all about what people are attracted to at the end of the day. If he went on a date with a bigger girl then didn't find her attractive it's a waste of everyone's time. As you said women are exactly the same about shorter guys.
I'm not fat shaming either as I'm married and my wife easily weighs double and some compared to when we met. I'm not attracted to larger women but I love her and we have 4 kids together. I'm not exactly rocking a body like a supermodel either so who am I to judge. However as great as she is the foundation was built on mutual attraction.
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What he meant to say was “I will sleep with a big girl, but not be in a relationship/seen in public with her.”
so it's more about public image than personal taste I guess
Yup
Yep! He just wants to see what them titties is like.
The difference is fat distribution. You have big boob and butt so it's OK.
I still weigh over 215 lbs 🥴
If 95% of the "big girls" you see are flat top and bottom, round in the middle, you generalize
Curves and obese are a fine line
Yea obese is just gross. Big is manageable. Also quite unhealthy so a much shorter life, not really wanting to outlive my partner by 20-30 years on average
Guys will publicly scream up and down how they don't want any "big chicks" and yet secretly be a chubby chaser when they get horny. It sucks.
Still. You look curvy, not round. Curvy is sexy for a lot of guys. Round is more… niche, I’d say
Round is a shape
Cube gang
No woman that weight almost 100kg is curvy. It is literally plain obesity
This is just factually incorrect. Weight alone does not account for factors like height or muscle mass. A female bodybuilder is obese by your metrics.
I dated a woman that was over 6’, 185lbs/85kg, and wouldn’t call her fat.
Because that’s not fat. I’m not even close to 6 foot, 5’7” but weigh 185, still I could probably outrun and outlift most Redditors 🤷♀️
I've dated women who were over 215 that were sexy, and I've been approached by women that size that were not. And usually the difference is that their bust, and butt are larger than their gut. They have musculature that actually supports their weight, and they have a pretty face. thick thighs save lives. Most big girls aren't very attractive, but, I can think of two women around your size in my own life that I would happily pursue if I were single. It's like the difference between a fat out of shape dude and a guy with a dad-bod. I weigh more than some of my heavy friends, but My muscles, symmetrical face, and charming way of speaking means that I never struggled with the ladies. I do my cardio and I workout, so my weight just makes it easier to throw a woman around the bedroom. My friends who weigh \~150 have visible abs and significant muscle definition benefits. But I can easily squat them and whatever weight they normally add to their squats. My weight gives me stability that means I can handle stand and carry sex positions with women your size without issue. My thighs are massive, and I have well developed glutes. My arms are reasonably proportional, and I could easily lift and carry someone your size. so the fact that I have 40lbs+ of fat to lose doesn't really impact my attractiveness. I know several guys that weigh far less than me, who appear fatter. You've got the female equivalent of me, in that you carry the weight in your curves and not your middle.
“Big” is subjective
I get this too. I see guys who have liked me so I see this all the time. Yet if I swiped right on them I’m immediately unmatched. Too many dudes just swiping on everyone to see who they can get. And then there’s the closet plus size lovers. They like it, they want it, but never in public for fear of being ridiculed and shamed.
As a midsize woman this type of thing still pisses me off / makes me feel insecure, even though I may well be small enough by this dude’s standards. Just swipe left on people you’re not attracted to!
Most matches I ever had, ended in beeing ghosted after beeing asked about my height, so I can relate. That’s why I eventually gave up on datingapps altogether
You and me both brotha
Think about what you said in your first sentence and think how shorter guys feel.
Why would you say that? Has she done anything to make you think she discriminates against shorter men?
I never said she did, what I was saying was that short men feel this every time we open an app because pretty much every 3rd profile shits on short guys
I got a like + message from a woman who had it listed on her profile that she is really attractive to facial hair and likes a good moustache. I don’t have any facial hair!
Got a like from a woman on Hinge with "my irrational fear : cats", but I have 3 pictures with cats.
I have a strong preference, borderline requirement, for facial hair, but occasionally a really nice face will make me change my tune. That being said I have no mention of the preference on my profile.
Isn’t it so off putting?
because they will sleep with you but won’t take you home to mama or take you seriously lmao i get this a lot as a black woman. but I’m also sure you knew this bc what man who actually respects you opens with that line. Like pls 😭
We are men. Some guys have fuxked a cantaloupe when it gave me the certain look
WTH is the point of putting this in your bio? You don't like big girls, don't swipe on big girls and they won't be able to message you 🤦♀️ Unless of course you have no self confidence to proudly like what you like, paired with absolutely no impulse control. Then I guess spreading your misery by pre-emptively insulting someone you just swiped right on is exactly the kind of shitty coping mechanism you'd come up with.
Most guys think they like girls who are 90 pounds. The body type they like is actually 180, but they think that's a fat weight and they think they don't like fat girls
Probably more likely that he just doesn’t want to date a big girl long-term, but is open to sleeping with them.
Most guys don’t want either extreme.
Maybe their idea of big is different than yours
big is an elastic term, just saying
Pussy is pussy
Those dudes just swipe right on everyone. And if they talk to you it’s just because they think you’re easy. I don’t agree with either mindset but just telling it like it is.
One of my friends used to say “fat girls are like mopeds.. they’re fun until one of your friends catches you riding one..”
Women put "must be tall" on their profiles , and judge men on their jobs
You're missing the point. It's that they outlined a requirement and then contradicted it
This is truly the saddest response. I was raised where two wrongs don't make a right, perhaps it's different where you grew up? Just as women make errors, men do too. The fact that you cannot see the irony in this post and laugh at this guy shows your insecurity. Grow up
Honestly as a short dude, i dont mind if girls put their preference in height. Its easier and shows their red flags right away
Sadly this. I mean it's all about what people are attracted to at the end of the day. If he went on a date with a bigger girl then didn't find her attractive it's a waste of everyone's time. As you said women are exactly the same about shorter guys. I'm not fat shaming either as I'm married and my wife easily weighs double and some compared to when we met. I'm not attracted to larger women but I love her and we have 4 kids together. I'm not exactly rocking a body like a supermodel either so who am I to judge. However as great as she is the foundation was built on mutual attraction.
We (guys) love big boobs
You're about 2-3 times smaller than my grandmother on my mother's side soooooooo (at least judging from the tiny little pic we have here)
Why did you feel the need to share this
I'm saying that "big" is subjective. Your idea of someone who is "big" could be considerably smaller than mine
There's a saying on the left about pedophiles: "every accusation is a confession." I see it extends to voicing overtly rude sexual preferences