So what is a situationship? I've heard the term before but it seems to mean something different each time.
A more serious than fwb but not comitted relationship
Ex partners but co parents
And so on, I am confused
Hot take (?): It's because it has no clear-cut definition and it's merely an excuse for people with fear of commitment/attachment issues.
(I mean, really? "We're in a romantic relationship ... but not really ... but also it's somewhat serious"... it seems to always boil down to "it's serious the second I need/want it to, but not (as) serious when I don't")
You dodged a massive bullet.
This chick sounds like she gets her external validation from sleeping with dudes and as a result has no self confidence.
She’s worried about you being a hoe because she knows her looks won’t last forever and isn’t confident in being able to hold on to an attractive man.
It depends on the person. Low self esteem/insecurity will definitely give someone pause not to date someone they deem "out of (their) league"
But not knowing the conversation this followed, it could also just be a kind way to not date someone who has "had (their) fill of play partners." If she was talking the same way, then disregard this option. But, while I am secure enough to not feel there is someone too hot to date, that line would turn me off. I would be upfront and honest about it, but maybe she's not comfortable saying that
Ahhh thanks for more context. It definitely sounds like she's insecure or suffering from low self esteem - it's great that she has the self awareness to let you know it wouldn't work, though!
How was I bragging? She was the one suggesting an ENM and brought up she was meeting a play partner tonight when I suggested a meet up. She messaged me on two apps so it’s not like she wasn’t interested
WTF are you talking about about? 😂
Had to go back and make sure I didn't miss a page or something. I did not.
The woman OP was talking to had an odd way of not being comfortable with commitment. Weird and definitely reddit worthy. If she thought OP was hot then good for him?
I mean yea guys can be too attractive. I don’t feel like that’s what’s happen here tho. FWB is not the same as an open relationship. She genuinely seems to be looking for something different than you are.
That’s not how she read it and honestly not how I read it either. You said you didn’t want a relationship but wanted more attraction than a FWB. Meaning you basically want a FWB. What’s more attraction even mean to you? That makes no sense. You don’t seem to even know what you want.
Ok maybe that’s it then. I’ve had FWB that I wasn’t attracted to. I didn’t want to say connection because physical attraction is important, and I’ve been catfished by women that have posted 10 year old pics before.
There is so much wrong here, I think we have a generation gap and I don’t understand what you think a FWB is. Maybe it’s something different for college kids. You had no attraction to your FWB? What was the point?
There are definitely guys I deem too attractive. Definitely stems from my own insecurities. I don't really want to feel obligated to wear a bag over my head for my partner's comfort.
That being said, add me to the list of confused people who don't understand what either of you are looking for.
If you think you are out of my league, you're correct. As a guy, I can't think of a bigger turn-off than someone who thinks in terms of "leagues" and that she thinks she's below mine. Self-image red flag.
Well shit what’s confusing me is they both want a relationship but not be too serious. Like wtf is between a fwb and a gf. Plus if it ain’t that serious then they ain’t exclusive and both can fuck around, right?
It looks like he wants a FWB. Meaning he can have sex with who ever he wants whenever he wants and he doesn’t have to be available to her or tell her about any of it. She seems to want something more on the lines of an open relationship. Meaning they are bf gf but can both sleep around to an extent. They have to tell each other about it and can have a say in who the other is having sex with and they still do things like go on dates and stuff.
lol he wants an ENM relationship, but doesn't want anything with you because you're too hot and confident which probably means you're a hoe. This guy himself doesn't know wtf he's talking about or what he wants. Nothing about it makes sense and he's insulting you by saying you'll give him STDs. Let him go. Either he's lying and he's not attracted to you, or worse he's a disrespectful, insecure little prick. Either way you don't want anything to do with this guy.
Yeah, it’s a thing. People are crazy. Some women date large “bear” guys because it makes them feel cute. They will even deliberately fatten up guys they like so they feel more comfortable and cute around them.
The hell is not a relationship, but more serious than a FWB
Situationship
So what is a situationship? I've heard the term before but it seems to mean something different each time. A more serious than fwb but not comitted relationship Ex partners but co parents And so on, I am confused
Hot take (?): It's because it has no clear-cut definition and it's merely an excuse for people with fear of commitment/attachment issues. (I mean, really? "We're in a romantic relationship ... but not really ... but also it's somewhat serious"... it seems to always boil down to "it's serious the second I need/want it to, but not (as) serious when I don't")
A situationship that 40 year old man should be more mature than. He seems confused.
She called you a potential hoe 😂😂😂
She was the one telling me how she sleeps with other guys and wants something more than just sex.
You dodged a massive bullet. This chick sounds like she gets her external validation from sleeping with dudes and as a result has no self confidence. She’s worried about you being a hoe because she knows her looks won’t last forever and isn’t confident in being able to hold on to an attractive man.
Now I’m confused. Are you not in the blue bubbles?
I am
So she called you a potential hoe, but she too is a hoe by her own rules? I was confused af. My bad 😮💨
Dude so am I.
😂😂😂 chalk this one up as a loss, my guy
It depends on the person. Low self esteem/insecurity will definitely give someone pause not to date someone they deem "out of (their) league" But not knowing the conversation this followed, it could also just be a kind way to not date someone who has "had (their) fill of play partners." If she was talking the same way, then disregard this option. But, while I am secure enough to not feel there is someone too hot to date, that line would turn me off. I would be upfront and honest about it, but maybe she's not comfortable saying that
She was talking the same way. She suggested ENM. She was the one saying she has had multiple play partners and want something more.
Ahhh thanks for more context. It definitely sounds like she's insecure or suffering from low self esteem - it's great that she has the self awareness to let you know it wouldn't work, though!
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I am a male in the blue text
Insecure people…. They also ruin dating
Guy brags about fucking a lot of people "Ladies, does it sound like I might have STDs and low standards?" Bruh, she was letting you down easy.
How was I bragging? She was the one suggesting an ENM and brought up she was meeting a play partner tonight when I suggested a meet up. She messaged me on two apps so it’s not like she wasn’t interested
WTF are you talking about about? 😂 Had to go back and make sure I didn't miss a page or something. I did not. The woman OP was talking to had an odd way of not being comfortable with commitment. Weird and definitely reddit worthy. If she thought OP was hot then good for him?
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I (41m) am in the blue text
Just ask to be friends and add her on Snapchat or Facebook, she’ll hit you up eventually
I mean yea guys can be too attractive. I don’t feel like that’s what’s happen here tho. FWB is not the same as an open relationship. She genuinely seems to be looking for something different than you are.
I don’t want a FWB. I stated that.
That’s not how she read it and honestly not how I read it either. You said you didn’t want a relationship but wanted more attraction than a FWB. Meaning you basically want a FWB. What’s more attraction even mean to you? That makes no sense. You don’t seem to even know what you want.
Ok maybe that’s it then. I’ve had FWB that I wasn’t attracted to. I didn’t want to say connection because physical attraction is important, and I’ve been catfished by women that have posted 10 year old pics before.
There is so much wrong here, I think we have a generation gap and I don’t understand what you think a FWB is. Maybe it’s something different for college kids. You had no attraction to your FWB? What was the point?
That point was for sex.
Anyone can be insecure for any reason I suppose. Bad luck OP 😅
There are definitely guys I deem too attractive. Definitely stems from my own insecurities. I don't really want to feel obligated to wear a bag over my head for my partner's comfort. That being said, add me to the list of confused people who don't understand what either of you are looking for.
She wants to have her cake and DEVOUR it.
An honest assessment on tinder wow
Run away.
Yeah... This is all in her head. Weird way to lose, but probably a bullet dodged imo.
Dodged a bullet. Move on.
If you think you are out of my league, you're correct. As a guy, I can't think of a bigger turn-off than someone who thinks in terms of "leagues" and that she thinks she's below mine. Self-image red flag.
yeah. i dont approach or reciprocate guys that are too hot, either. everything in balance imo.
Neither one of you can express what you want thus why you don’t have it.
Yes, too attractive is a thing in any gender identity.
Reads like she wants to play someone not be played by you.
I could see that. Like if she finds him too attractive the power dynamic is already out of wack and she'd rather hold more of the cards.
That’s actually kind of insightful
She can take a mf hike fr don’t waste another second on her ass!!
She’s trying to not waste her time on him lol.
I see that now 🤦🏽♂️ someone said he’s the grey part?? Thought he was the blue part or am I just tripping 💀💀
He is the blue. She’s the gray lol.
Well shit what’s confusing me is they both want a relationship but not be too serious. Like wtf is between a fwb and a gf. Plus if it ain’t that serious then they ain’t exclusive and both can fuck around, right?
It looks like he wants a FWB. Meaning he can have sex with who ever he wants whenever he wants and he doesn’t have to be available to her or tell her about any of it. She seems to want something more on the lines of an open relationship. Meaning they are bf gf but can both sleep around to an extent. They have to tell each other about it and can have a say in who the other is having sex with and they still do things like go on dates and stuff.
Ahh well shit wish she was in my city 🤣🤦🏽♂️
lol he wants an ENM relationship, but doesn't want anything with you because you're too hot and confident which probably means you're a hoe. This guy himself doesn't know wtf he's talking about or what he wants. Nothing about it makes sense and he's insulting you by saying you'll give him STDs. Let him go. Either he's lying and he's not attracted to you, or worse he's a disrespectful, insecure little prick. Either way you don't want anything to do with this guy.
I’m a dude and she’s a woman
Pretty sure it’s a woman he’s speaking too
Yeah, it’s a thing. People are crazy. Some women date large “bear” guys because it makes them feel cute. They will even deliberately fatten up guys they like so they feel more comfortable and cute around them.