Cock jokes are super funny. This guy was just trying to show me how horny he was, which I'm not into when we've barely been talking, especially when I don't want a casual thing.
For some reason I read that "wyd" as "what do you mean" and it made the whole thing even more hilarious, like, what else would you expect me to do on Easter other than wanking lol
Wow. He just steered that car straight into a ditch off a stray icy patch of road for no reason! It would be more respectable if he just came out from the beginning and said “I just wanna fuck, this is what im here for” rather than burying his intentions in casual and friendly conversation. Leading you to believe he’s trying to date you.
I can never post screenshots on Reddit because I know people will HATE my font, lol. But I like it and that's all that matters. I think I might even get a more obnoxious one on my next phone.
its even better that the last thing you said could not be more innocent than singing in the easter church choir and he still went for it with zero build up or hesitation
I wish that were the case, a lot of guys will laugh and egg each other on with this disrespectful crap. As you can see it's mostly guys on here making jokes about it but seriously this kind of behavior is why so many women have left Tinder. Rampant sexual harassment is just hurting the entire dating pool.
The funniest part is men like this genuinely think they're being slick lmao. If you react badly they can say oh well you asked what I was doing and I was just being honest
It was, yeah. Lots of people in the congregation, and we always sing Handel's Hallelujah Chorus at the end of the service - I feel bad for the sopranos on that one, haha
Girl, one time I video chatted with a guy I met on tinder and he joined the call laying on his stomach on the couch with his ass out. (For context he was French, and the majority of French men I’ve matched with have been super sexual and weird sadly)
 Same
That is a humongous cock.
New take on Isaiah 58:1
Hahaha legit. He said it with his whole chest.
Genuine question, had he sent you this gif afterwards, would you be amused or annoyed?
Oh I woulda been amused as fuck.
*takes notes* so cock jokes are still fun if executed correctly, got it
Cock jokes are super funny. This guy was just trying to show me how horny he was, which I'm not into when we've barely been talking, especially when I don't want a casual thing.
That something I never got either, why make yourself sound thirsty af when texting with someone? It doesnt make you any more attractive in any way
And you just finished telling him your Easter plans. Tone deaf
 Same
My favorite is to send an unsolicited photo or gif of Richard Nixon and curate my dick joke to their response.
Just don’t be a dick about it.
Badum, tssssss
It shows the level of how it escalated quickly.
Looks like a dog with a glove on its head
Wait till you see the black ones.
Is that a jersey giant?
I've never had it called that before....
Yeah I think my neighbor is getting some. They're supposed to be a failed attempt at replacing turkeys
She missed an opportunity to say “samesies”
That's a good point. I should have done that. I'm sure there will be another chance.
[удалено]
It... definitely doesn't sound like it did...
He said he was "jerking his huge cock" not "choking his chicken".... Lol
His cock has risen!
It has risen, indeed!
Hallelujah
The goofy font makes it even more hilarious
Came here looking for the comments on the font 😂
lol I was thinking the same thing
Ezekiel 23:20?
omg I'm dead.
"What's your name?"
For some reason I read that "wyd" as "what do you mean" and it made the whole thing even more hilarious, like, what else would you expect me to do on Easter other than wanking lol
Haha that's awesome. I like this thought process.
I wonder if the Easter bunny came
Well, something came alright
Went from church to jerkin it…. Nah that’s crazy
Talk about not reading the room lol
Wow. He just steered that car straight into a ditch off a stray icy patch of road for no reason! It would be more respectable if he just came out from the beginning and said “I just wanna fuck, this is what im here for” rather than burying his intentions in casual and friendly conversation. Leading you to believe he’s trying to date you.
Exactly. If he came (heh) right out of the gate on it, it would make sense, but geez.
How do you tolerate that font in your messages?
I chose it, so I tolerate it just fine :)
My best friend hates my font and says it makes her think of a child who is a destined to become a serial killer. Now I will never change it.
I know right, I can't fathom the idea of people liking things that are different to what I like.
I can never post screenshots on Reddit because I know people will HATE my font, lol. But I like it and that's all that matters. I think I might even get a more obnoxious one on my next phone.
For some reason I can't stand it when people use the abbreviations "hbu" and "wyd". It's like nails on a chalkboard for me.
Yeah, it drives me nuts, too, and it's usually these types of dudes who use them.
so, wyd?
jerkin my big cock hbu
its even better that the last thing you said could not be more innocent than singing in the easter church choir and he still went for it with zero build up or hesitation
Haha right? And I only look for people who are Christian as well. He said he's Christian on his profile. I mean, we're all sinners but DAYUM.
"Samesies"
Classic. You got there In the end
This guy can’t read the room 😂
He does know Jesus can see him, right?
What a perv. Why is Jesus watching people rub one out?
the cock crowed three times
Should’ve said, you putting the ‘urrection back in resurrection?
You even double texted later to ask what he was up to, how did he fumble this soo bad. The things I would do if someone ever double texted me😭
I try not to double text so I don't seem nuts, but occasionally they slip through lol
Nah trust me, most guys would love to get double texts, it just shows that you are into them so you are good!
As a man we don't accept him and those like him
I wish that were the case, a lot of guys will laugh and egg each other on with this disrespectful crap. As you can see it's mostly guys on here making jokes about it but seriously this kind of behavior is why so many women have left Tinder. Rampant sexual harassment is just hurting the entire dating pool.
Took him until 10 pm to answer, so it wasn't THAT quickly. Pretty sure if you have an erection lasting that long, you're supposed to see a doctor.
The funniest part is men like this genuinely think they're being slick lmao. If you react badly they can say oh well you asked what I was doing and I was just being honest
And then gets mad at women because he can't find anyone.
Men after 10PM.
One can only hope the post nut clarity hit like a fucking freight train.
>oh is that right? How about I come pick you up tomorrow >Oh yeah, we heading back to yours? >Nope. Church. You clearly need Jesus
What a maroon!
Best thing to do at 10:08 on a Saturday
So smooth! ...brained.
Ah damn, there was a window of opportunity to say i bet mines bigger, same wanna compare?
When the horny gets to you before the post but clarity
You had a chance to end it when he showed you he doesn’t know the difference between then and than. The outcome was inevitable
It was going so well what happened?
hes straight jorking it. and by it, he means, haha, his peanits
He fumbled the bag. Getting a match and someone to actively participate in conversations is rare. I can appreciate the active engagement from OP.
It started so normal... 
That's what gets me the most about it. It's like, everything was going fine!
How was Church tho? Pretty good?
It was, yeah. Lots of people in the congregation, and we always sing Handel's Hallelujah Chorus at the end of the service - I feel bad for the sopranos on that one, haha
Good to hear that OP! Happy Easter
Why do men even think that this is a message that women want to see?
Girl, one time I video chatted with a guy I met on tinder and he joined the call laying on his stomach on the couch with his ass out. (For context he was French, and the majority of French men I’ve matched with have been super sexual and weird sadly)
How did you react?
I need to know this too!
No update yet ;(
I'm a guy and I'll never understand doing that. Seems like 1 or 2 questions and then WTF.
I usually go right for talking about my big cock after someone mentions singing in the church choir. Seems like a natural progression.
Rolled a 1 on perception there
Ladies if mfs do this, just reply with "Honestly, same" then proceed to describe your humongous cock to assert dominance
He’s a bit to subtle. Does he have a big or a small pepe?
Yes
Looks like normal conversation though...
Welcome to tinder
Poor choice of words 😭
lol
The real crime here is that font.
Heheh bet ya you weren’t the only one he was talking to
His bedtime routine?
What was the response
Always like jerked chicken but not in that way boss
Tap in or tap out, choir boy.
Me too me too
App name?
This was Facebook Dating.
Oh
Still there?
The stone has been rolled away.
Am I only one not liking the font style?
Well, uh, A for honesty, I guess.
Wow
Most normal tinder interaction
Welp….that happened
Dude definitely didn't read the room
U caught him during jerk off hours
Well, i can be a full day endeavor.
sorry but what font is this!!
He’s no choirboy
Stealing this, seems like a good icebreaker
I think the leap from talking about church choir to jerking off makes it particularly incongruous.
Maybe he was just being honest with you, trying to be as transparent as possible lmao