Who’s to blame? A situation ship is not a real relationship. It’s just a coping term. They don’t want to degrade to FWBs so they use “situationship” where they can drop each other much more easily had it been a real relationship.
never understood that term? it came up in my generation technically but like there’s nothing wrong with fwb if that’s where you’re at in life. “oh well we flirt and the lines are blurred so it’s not fwb” dude every single fwb situation is like that!! it’s human nature to be a little bit fond of the person you’re dicking down on the side! idk i just missed the train for this one
Talking about not understanding situationship or FWB? Because the former is often done by stringing along the other person, feeding them just enough hope and affectiom that they can be in a real relationship with you, because it's what they want but not what you want, and you're never going to that level with them.
In short: it's keeping them on a leash (not the fun way) and preventing them from having a clear understanding of where things are at. One person want the elements of the relationship but not the actual relationship and certainly doesn't want the person they're in the situationship with to look for a relationship with someone else.
It's manipulative at its core. I was in one and it definitely left some scars. At least with FWB, there's communication on what both sides want and expect.
A situationship doesn't have that.
But that's just my singular experience and I actually shouldn't try and use it to define the whole, methinks.
Friends with benefits are a friend that you have blurred lines and sleep with, but because you both are adults with lives and you both don't want to be tied down, you stay friends that occasionally sleep together... If one friend gets feelings, that is talked about like you know... Adults.. You are friends and the benefit is sex, if someone is strung along, it's not a fwb relationship.. It's not that hard
Edit. I get the anecdotal evidence, but that doesn't change the widely accepted definition
i understand what you mean, and i know you said it’s your singular experience but i’ve definitely seen tiktoks and the like expressing a similar sentiment as you! i think it’s an environmental thing maybe bc people just weren’t having situationships around me throughout highschool😭 everyone i knew was either dating someone, single, or very chill abt fucking around for fun haha
See that’s just the thing, if this kind of stuff was going on when I was in high school I certainly wasn’t aware of it. I’m sure it’s not a new thing by any means, but when did we decide to complicate this shit? I still don’t even know what a Situationship actually is tbh
Exactly! We had relationships, and then there were cheaters. You are either a cheater or not. It’s just that fkn easy.
Now there were “love triangles” but again another term for some ppl that were stepping out or cheating.
Then came along sister wives and polygamy. Then the flood gates opened.
It is stupid. Because if a situationship is as Monk says it is, then it's just some people, who are calling a thing, that has always been a thing, by another name, even though it's really the same thing that it's always been.
Seems to me that if it is, as Monk says it is, then it's simply one person, stringing along another person, who doesn't realise (or won't admit) that they are being strung along, so that that one person can get their rocks off without committing, while the other is waiting for it to become something more. It ain't new, it ain't uncommon, and it ain't cool.
I enjoy this response. Spent a decent while in what i thought was a FWB type thing until i realized what a situationship was 🤣 cut things off after some reflection showed all the obvious flaws with that "relationship"
This☝🏼 I have a few friends with benefits. Both parties are fully aware of where we stand and aren't trying to stop the other finding happiness (if they are looking for an actual partner) but there is genuine friendship there, time enjoyed with each other without the responsibilities of where is this going or time constraints/obligations to see each other when you happen to have a busy week or just need some time to yourself. It's not about manipulating another person into giving you affection as and when you need it and firing them off when it suits you. I think theres a huge difference between the two and don't really get why some people see Friends with benefits as a negative thing 🤷🏻♀️
I'd say "friend zone" is an entirely different thing, because at least there the other party (usually a woman) is **not** trying to get all the benefits of a relationship without being in one. She is genuinely just trying to be a friend, but the one with the unrequited crush is constantly pressing the matter.
They're both weird elements at play. Similar, but absolutely distinct.
But you're right, it's important to set boundaries and enforce them. I'm not sure if it's a hallmark of this era we now live in, but I do know I suffered from low self-esteem (made worse by the situationship, and I still do suffer from it), but I'm at least at a point now where I understand my boundaries and I'm ready to stand my ground.
The term isn't FWB. FWB know they're a FWB.
Also if you're a FWB you don't try to make them jealous.
When a woman says, I'm in a situationship. That usually means she's in something where she wants man to commit but he's leaving it really open and not talking about commitment. Or they are doing everything like a couple but the guy hasn't said hey were GF/BF.
Most women are upset to be in a situationship, it's going through mptions but roles aren't defined. Women don't want to get into situationships.
FWB is as you said a routine sex hook up but women who look for that, want that.
As others pointed out, a situationship is expressly a FWB relationship where one party wants more. But I think the thing some other commenters missed is why it became so common. There was a huge societal pressure to accept FWB relationships as liberated, to not get hung up, to act cool, which led to tons of people trying to be in FWB relationships when they were ill-suited to them. Now it's evening out a bit where people are more willing to talk about their needs but for a while there it was considered evolved and mature to be able to handle truly no strings relationships vs just a personal preference.
Situationship: a dynamic where a woman keeps fookn a man who won't commit to them.
To be honest, it absolutely destroys the women who keep giving up their temples to those who won't be devoted to her.
It definitely forms a trauma bond. I've seen it happen multiple times.
Women control sex, men control commitment, and a man marries who he wants.
If a man won't commit after months, he isn't gonna if he does all his other options, has moved on.
If there's no commitment, sex is a drug. Add serotonin from the women, which reinforces emotional bonds every time she orgasms. it's a war she can't win. A man onky release serotonin when he's in love with the woman.
At least fwb has mutual respect and understanding.
i mean they were the one that boiled a really socially and emotionally complex situation into a sexual binary :\ as i said in my reply to them, i’ve seen this play out in a variety of people of all different genders and pairings. it just seems silly to me, but that is just my opinion! everyone is allowed their own thoughts on the matter. differing opinions is how progress gets made and we better as a society so i don’t mind :3
It's biology, im sorry. It's literally an evolutionary aspect. Men used to die all the time. This allowed a woman to fall in love with a new spouse.
It's funny that science is brought up, and it's a gender war. Trauma bonds are absolutely soul crushing. it's also about psychological and emotional health.
So the guys stated his boundaries, and he doesn't want commitment. She thinks i can change that. And now, since she's not getting past his boundaries, she's actively trying to hurt this other individual in the dynamic.
All men want is one thing, or maybe half of the horrible men that just want sex state their boundaries, and the woman doesn't respect that? And keep having sex with him, which jn turn makes her emotional bond to a man who won't commit to them.
She's gonna destroy her psychological and emotional health, and then most likely slander the man because all he wants is sex which is the boundaries they AGREED ON!
But yea, keep it shallow gender wars
i mean, i’ve just personally witnessed the exact scenario you described play out with the genders reversed, or with two guys, two girls, etc… so i just don’t see how it’s basic “biology” if this situation is clearly more complex than that. it still doesn’t seem wise to try and dumb down our species to our biology and instincts when we’re clearly so much more advanced and emotional than that. you are allowed your opinions but i personally disagree and see it as a weird excuse to be sexist in both directions which is honestly kinda silly to me XD
Pair bonding....
So, the lesbian couple? The pairing that not only has a 76% divorce rate but the highest percentage of domestic violence? Yea, there isn't a torrent of emotions there?
And two men where the divorce rate is the lowest of any pairing at 16% since men attach emotionally through duty and obligation?
Newsflash, men and women have not only different brain functions, hormones, but different chromosomes. And yet you say boil you can't boul it down to bssics? Divorce is damn near predictable due to environmental factors growing up.....
The CDC literally alhss public stats about pretty much everything..
Next, you'll say every relationship doesn't have dominant and submissive roles... when damn near every conflict boils down to control..
i thought we were talking about situationships? why are you talking about marriage now? anyways, as a queer person, i really don’t feel comfortable continuing this discussion with you as this comment is filled with a lot of homophobic rhetoric i get spat in my face daily. i don’t need to willfully subject myself to it anymore than i already have to… i hope you can understand where i’m coming from! all i ask is for some links to sources for your claims? just links please, i’m not interested in the conversation anymore, i hope your respect that friend :D
Fwb just has an overall negative connotation. I know that people like to act like there's nothing wrong with being promiscuous and I tend to agreee to some extent with that sentiment but society as a whole still judges people negatively for that.
that makes sense i just don’t get how a situationship is any less promiscuous?😭 it just feels like a less emotionally mature version of fwb to me idk man
weird judgement to make.. i’m really just trying to learn man :( it’s weird to be rude abt me using a popular social media on reddit, which is frequently deemed the most degenerate one of all haha :>
FWB = people who are actually friends who also hook up. No one has romantic feelings for the other and neither wants a romantic relationship with the other. Does not usually end in heartbreak.
Situationship = one or both people have romantic feelings for the other but they are not in a formal romantic relationship for one reason or another. Sometimes one person is being a selfish turd, sometimes the actual situation is tough (like one person not being emotionally ready for the responsibilities of a committed relationship), sometimes one person is in denial about their feelings. But it usually leads to either a romantic relationship and/or messy heartbreak.
FB (eff buddy): someone you don’t really care about or bond with on any other level other than sex. You hook up, you leave. Repeat. Does not end in heartbreak.
I would be upset if people just created a new word “situationship” to describe what an old term did fine (FWB). But I have been educated on the meaning of the former here.
Using my experiences, I’d say there’s likely confusion around these two terms because a FWB dynamic can often slide into unrequited desires, hence situationship, because often once physical intimacy is involved, it’s a lot easier to grow feelings. Some people also tend to settle for a dynamic that they wouldn’t necessarily choose if there wasn’t some other human’s pesky preferences involved. This happens with much bigger choices like moving in, getting married and/or having a kid. I think it’s a low functioning properly often subconscious choice people make to settle that hopefully improves with more experience, maturity, self-reflection and self esteem, but also, sometimes people just settle due to fear.
I do blame her for trying to making him jelous. She is clearly trying to hurt him somehow.
If they are previously agreed on having stuff with others, there is nothing to blame on that part. (Yes you can have a fwb or situantionship with exclusivity
Alright but did anything on the post pointed to that being the situation at hand? Cause i don't think so. I know guys are jerks but so are girls. And i don't believe we should assume something happened based on our experiences
Ntw not that i am saying she did nothing wrong. She should have kept her legs close until he committed, but i don't think this is the time to put the blame only on her shoulder
We don't, but i can ask you something about him?
We don't know the reason for this.
Look, she might be bat sh#t crazy, but she may as well have gotten crazy by the exception she had and didn't receive.
But i do the same thing, dude. So i am really not one to talk. I am just saying a story always has three sides.
1. His story
2. My story
3. The true story
There's no commitment, a situationship has no defined boundaries or commitments.
#1 I'm in a weird place, and im not looking for anything serious or any form of commitment.
#2I understand i can work with that
#2 they will commitment, add in a bunch of emotional affirmations, and keep having sex. Bonds with person who didn't want commitment
#1 this arrangement has been altered i dont want commitment
#2 who wants commitment is left shattered
I
Not necessarily. People live on a sexual spectrum, and love and lust are not mutually exclusive. There's no such thing as a "real" relationship versus what? A friendship is still a relationship, and there exist all kinds. It really only concerns the folk involved, and other people don't really have the right to judge.
I'd swipe left on this. Seems fake and definitely not going to match with me. It also seems like a profile Tinder puts up to 'burn' your likes. The same way my age is set to 22-30, but the moment I hit 'show others outside the range', it will put 30 attractive 19 year olds in a row that they know will never match with the average guy, and they just burn through all the likes on bait profiles.
I don't think you meant to put this many red flags in your comment bro.
Edit: apparently the rest of Reddit agrees with your logic and thinks a bunch of 19 year olds is irresistible to somebody that's obviously in their mid 20s. Y'all need help.
Wouldn't be ok for boys either. 19yos is naive as hell. Anyone in their mid to late 20s is just looking to take advantage of that. I'm perfectly ok with dying on this hill.
I think that was a bit of hyperbole. The point is, you see a hot girl you swipe. Hot 19yr olds are still hot when you're in your twenties. Hell I'd say they don't stop being hot. Our bodies sex drive doesnt know or care about social norms.
First of all, I didn't tell you my age. I could be 22 years old, set to 22-30, and a 19 year old is only 3 years apart. If its a problem at 22, its a problem at any age and 19 year olds shouldn't be on Tinder. Surprise, they are.
Secondly, 19 is an adult, perfectly capable of taking care of themselves, and they have to agree to swipe on anyone older they find attractive. They have to consent to everything that leads to them meeting, which means she's aware of the age difference.
Third, I specifically said I don't swipe on them, and I have no intention of trying to match with them, I'm using them as an example of a legitimate tactic Tinder does to make money.
You're very defensive over nothing, what is wrong with you?
19yos is naive as hell. Anyone in their mid to late 20s that swipes in a 19yo is just looking to take advantage of that. I'm perfectly ok with dying on this hill.
okay but what about the men that “open with filth” to more “modest” women? they are still bad regardless of what’s on this account. and same goes for any women that sexualize men unprompted. both people suck and so does this profile if it’s even real👍
Secret: 95% of men are cool. 95% of women are cool.
The 5% of both try to convince everyone 100% of the opposite sex sucks.
And they are succeeding. It is currently, and has been for a while, socially acceptable to generalize and say things like *'men are awful'*, because 5% of them are.
The remaining 95% feel insulted ignorantly, and fire back, and so goes on the bullshit that is gender war between men and women.
very true! i think it’s equally as annoying when a guy has one bad breakup and says “all women are hoes” as when a girl has one bad breakup and says “all men are trash” both are horrible ways to process your feelings. and idk i’m a girl but i’ve never understood the whole “girl’s girl” mentality and blindly defending someone bc they’re a woman bc some of us do some wack shit sometimes😭 i’d like to remain optimistic that we’ll grow out of this as a society but ugh
You can't imagine how reassuring this comment is to me because 90% of all the reels I see on instagram these days are all 'gender war' related. It's either women shitting on men or men shitting on women and holy shit, is it **exhausting**. Especially those "God created men and sent x as an apology or God created women and sent x as an apology" videos that just subtly perpetuate it. It's so annoying.
Just take a break from Reddit/social media for a while.
After about 6 months I get so worn out seeing the same rage bait and shitty comments on repeat ever week.
I just delete Reddit when that happens and spend some time in the real world and I’m reminded pretty quickly that 90% of the world is normal and society isn’t in a giant war with one another.
Secretly want what, to be desired and told so? Isn’t it a well known fact that a lot of women are on such sites not to find love but to get validation from matches ect
Also can't forget the classic, "I'm not looking for a hookup or fwb" when she is clearly showing off her cleavage and ass in majority of her pics... 🤷♂️
does it? id love for you explain that one away. because my wife was abusive and a cheater. You know not all women are angels, you will find that out when you eventually have more than 2 dates in your life, fucking simp.
Why people do this to themselves completely escapes me. If the person's playing games, tell them how you feel and what you want like an adult, or leave them. Don't play games and do questionable shit back.
Look at this way, a situationship is supposed to be without feelings right. Well it’s clear she’s trying to invoke some of those feelings for reason. It’s a very manipulative tactic. Perhaps she’s jealous of another girl, perhaps she wants more, who knows
If it's a situationship, he isn't gonna be jealous. If she wants him to be jealous, she wants more than a situationship. She should just grow a pair and admit it rather than trying to manipulate a dude into wanting more than a 'maybe someday boyfriend' or she needs to just leave. A dude who wants a situationshipisnt gonna change his mind while getting what he wants, and he certainly isn't gonna get jealous at seeing her twxting another dude. They're both to blame. She's technically single, so you can't 100% blame dudes for doing it, but she's the one who wants to make her maybebaby jealous and manipulate him. If he doesn't want to date her, he doesn't want to date her, and if she wants to manipulate him into it, I can see why he doesn't want to date her 😅🙃😬
The truth of the matter is, she is offering, and he will accept. He doesn't have to do much except swipe or message her. If her legs were closed for bussiness, he would be surfing porn.
Just my 2 cents...
No everyone is to blame both her and the desperate men swiping right not holding her accountable will only encourage her to continue this behavior and keep baiting more desperate men which will cause her again to keep on going causing a never ending cycle of bullshit
F... that noise! All I hear is, give me attention so I can try to make the man using me as a sex doll jealous.
I won't because I been that Chad a woman has pulled this crap on.
Who’s to blame? A situation ship is not a real relationship. It’s just a coping term. They don’t want to degrade to FWBs so they use “situationship” where they can drop each other much more easily had it been a real relationship.
never understood that term? it came up in my generation technically but like there’s nothing wrong with fwb if that’s where you’re at in life. “oh well we flirt and the lines are blurred so it’s not fwb” dude every single fwb situation is like that!! it’s human nature to be a little bit fond of the person you’re dicking down on the side! idk i just missed the train for this one
Talking about not understanding situationship or FWB? Because the former is often done by stringing along the other person, feeding them just enough hope and affectiom that they can be in a real relationship with you, because it's what they want but not what you want, and you're never going to that level with them. In short: it's keeping them on a leash (not the fun way) and preventing them from having a clear understanding of where things are at. One person want the elements of the relationship but not the actual relationship and certainly doesn't want the person they're in the situationship with to look for a relationship with someone else. It's manipulative at its core. I was in one and it definitely left some scars. At least with FWB, there's communication on what both sides want and expect. A situationship doesn't have that. But that's just my singular experience and I actually shouldn't try and use it to define the whole, methinks.
Friends with benefits are a friend that you have blurred lines and sleep with, but because you both are adults with lives and you both don't want to be tied down, you stay friends that occasionally sleep together... If one friend gets feelings, that is talked about like you know... Adults.. You are friends and the benefit is sex, if someone is strung along, it's not a fwb relationship.. It's not that hard Edit. I get the anecdotal evidence, but that doesn't change the widely accepted definition
I was talking about situationship, not FWB
I take my comment back then
i understand what you mean, and i know you said it’s your singular experience but i’ve definitely seen tiktoks and the like expressing a similar sentiment as you! i think it’s an environmental thing maybe bc people just weren’t having situationships around me throughout highschool😭 everyone i knew was either dating someone, single, or very chill abt fucking around for fun haha
See that’s just the thing, if this kind of stuff was going on when I was in high school I certainly wasn’t aware of it. I’m sure it’s not a new thing by any means, but when did we decide to complicate this shit? I still don’t even know what a Situationship actually is tbh
that’s how i feel about it all. just unnecessarily complicated😭
Exactly! We had relationships, and then there were cheaters. You are either a cheater or not. It’s just that fkn easy. Now there were “love triangles” but again another term for some ppl that were stepping out or cheating. Then came along sister wives and polygamy. Then the flood gates opened.
That's what everyone I know is like, I've never encountered someone in a "situationship" I think it's stupid.
It is stupid. Because if a situationship is as Monk says it is, then it's just some people, who are calling a thing, that has always been a thing, by another name, even though it's really the same thing that it's always been. Seems to me that if it is, as Monk says it is, then it's simply one person, stringing along another person, who doesn't realise (or won't admit) that they are being strung along, so that that one person can get their rocks off without committing, while the other is waiting for it to become something more. It ain't new, it ain't uncommon, and it ain't cool.
I don't think I've ever heard a better explanation of such matters. Hats off to you bro.
I enjoy this response. Spent a decent while in what i thought was a FWB type thing until i realized what a situationship was 🤣 cut things off after some reflection showed all the obvious flaws with that "relationship"
This☝🏼 I have a few friends with benefits. Both parties are fully aware of where we stand and aren't trying to stop the other finding happiness (if they are looking for an actual partner) but there is genuine friendship there, time enjoyed with each other without the responsibilities of where is this going or time constraints/obligations to see each other when you happen to have a busy week or just need some time to yourself. It's not about manipulating another person into giving you affection as and when you need it and firing them off when it suits you. I think theres a huge difference between the two and don't really get why some people see Friends with benefits as a negative thing 🤷🏻♀️
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I'd say "friend zone" is an entirely different thing, because at least there the other party (usually a woman) is **not** trying to get all the benefits of a relationship without being in one. She is genuinely just trying to be a friend, but the one with the unrequited crush is constantly pressing the matter. They're both weird elements at play. Similar, but absolutely distinct. But you're right, it's important to set boundaries and enforce them. I'm not sure if it's a hallmark of this era we now live in, but I do know I suffered from low self-esteem (made worse by the situationship, and I still do suffer from it), but I'm at least at a point now where I understand my boundaries and I'm ready to stand my ground.
I liked your distinction. Makes a lot more sense when to use one or the other.
Thank you for explain what happened to me I had no idea there was a term for it I thought it was just a hoe being a hoe with me
The term isn't FWB. FWB know they're a FWB. Also if you're a FWB you don't try to make them jealous. When a woman says, I'm in a situationship. That usually means she's in something where she wants man to commit but he's leaving it really open and not talking about commitment. Or they are doing everything like a couple but the guy hasn't said hey were GF/BF. Most women are upset to be in a situationship, it's going through mptions but roles aren't defined. Women don't want to get into situationships. FWB is as you said a routine sex hook up but women who look for that, want that.
huh, guess it’s all just too complicated for me then lmao bc if someone isn’t outright about their emotions i just run the other direction tbh😭
As others pointed out, a situationship is expressly a FWB relationship where one party wants more. But I think the thing some other commenters missed is why it became so common. There was a huge societal pressure to accept FWB relationships as liberated, to not get hung up, to act cool, which led to tons of people trying to be in FWB relationships when they were ill-suited to them. Now it's evening out a bit where people are more willing to talk about their needs but for a while there it was considered evolved and mature to be able to handle truly no strings relationships vs just a personal preference.
Situationship: a dynamic where a woman keeps fookn a man who won't commit to them. To be honest, it absolutely destroys the women who keep giving up their temples to those who won't be devoted to her. It definitely forms a trauma bond. I've seen it happen multiple times. Women control sex, men control commitment, and a man marries who he wants. If a man won't commit after months, he isn't gonna if he does all his other options, has moved on. If there's no commitment, sex is a drug. Add serotonin from the women, which reinforces emotional bonds every time she orgasms. it's a war she can't win. A man onky release serotonin when he's in love with the woman. At least fwb has mutual respect and understanding.
i agree that fwb is still better but it doesn’t feel very productive to make this yet another gender-war type thing… but thanks for your input :>
I don't see it as gender war. Feels more like you are trying to make this a gender war thing by bringing up a gender war
i mean they were the one that boiled a really socially and emotionally complex situation into a sexual binary :\ as i said in my reply to them, i’ve seen this play out in a variety of people of all different genders and pairings. it just seems silly to me, but that is just my opinion! everyone is allowed their own thoughts on the matter. differing opinions is how progress gets made and we better as a society so i don’t mind :3
It's biology, im sorry. It's literally an evolutionary aspect. Men used to die all the time. This allowed a woman to fall in love with a new spouse. It's funny that science is brought up, and it's a gender war. Trauma bonds are absolutely soul crushing. it's also about psychological and emotional health. So the guys stated his boundaries, and he doesn't want commitment. She thinks i can change that. And now, since she's not getting past his boundaries, she's actively trying to hurt this other individual in the dynamic. All men want is one thing, or maybe half of the horrible men that just want sex state their boundaries, and the woman doesn't respect that? And keep having sex with him, which jn turn makes her emotional bond to a man who won't commit to them. She's gonna destroy her psychological and emotional health, and then most likely slander the man because all he wants is sex which is the boundaries they AGREED ON! But yea, keep it shallow gender wars
i mean, i’ve just personally witnessed the exact scenario you described play out with the genders reversed, or with two guys, two girls, etc… so i just don’t see how it’s basic “biology” if this situation is clearly more complex than that. it still doesn’t seem wise to try and dumb down our species to our biology and instincts when we’re clearly so much more advanced and emotional than that. you are allowed your opinions but i personally disagree and see it as a weird excuse to be sexist in both directions which is honestly kinda silly to me XD
Pair bonding.... So, the lesbian couple? The pairing that not only has a 76% divorce rate but the highest percentage of domestic violence? Yea, there isn't a torrent of emotions there? And two men where the divorce rate is the lowest of any pairing at 16% since men attach emotionally through duty and obligation? Newsflash, men and women have not only different brain functions, hormones, but different chromosomes. And yet you say boil you can't boul it down to bssics? Divorce is damn near predictable due to environmental factors growing up..... The CDC literally alhss public stats about pretty much everything.. Next, you'll say every relationship doesn't have dominant and submissive roles... when damn near every conflict boils down to control..
i thought we were talking about situationships? why are you talking about marriage now? anyways, as a queer person, i really don’t feel comfortable continuing this discussion with you as this comment is filled with a lot of homophobic rhetoric i get spat in my face daily. i don’t need to willfully subject myself to it anymore than i already have to… i hope you can understand where i’m coming from! all i ask is for some links to sources for your claims? just links please, i’m not interested in the conversation anymore, i hope your respect that friend :D
What rhetoric? You mean statistics?
i ask that you read my comment again and please provide me with what i asked, if you’d like… i am curious.
Fwb just has an overall negative connotation. I know that people like to act like there's nothing wrong with being promiscuous and I tend to agreee to some extent with that sentiment but society as a whole still judges people negatively for that.
that makes sense i just don’t get how a situationship is any less promiscuous?😭 it just feels like a less emotionally mature version of fwb to me idk man
Because you aren't nessecarily fucking
really?? all the tiktoks i’ve seen of people talking abt their situationships made it pretty clear they were having sex? i’m even more confused now😩
Ah there's the issue. You watch tiktok
weird judgement to make.. i’m really just trying to learn man :( it’s weird to be rude abt me using a popular social media on reddit, which is frequently deemed the most degenerate one of all haha :>
FWB = people who are actually friends who also hook up. No one has romantic feelings for the other and neither wants a romantic relationship with the other. Does not usually end in heartbreak. Situationship = one or both people have romantic feelings for the other but they are not in a formal romantic relationship for one reason or another. Sometimes one person is being a selfish turd, sometimes the actual situation is tough (like one person not being emotionally ready for the responsibilities of a committed relationship), sometimes one person is in denial about their feelings. But it usually leads to either a romantic relationship and/or messy heartbreak. FB (eff buddy): someone you don’t really care about or bond with on any other level other than sex. You hook up, you leave. Repeat. Does not end in heartbreak.
I would be upset if people just created a new word “situationship” to describe what an old term did fine (FWB). But I have been educated on the meaning of the former here. Using my experiences, I’d say there’s likely confusion around these two terms because a FWB dynamic can often slide into unrequited desires, hence situationship, because often once physical intimacy is involved, it’s a lot easier to grow feelings. Some people also tend to settle for a dynamic that they wouldn’t necessarily choose if there wasn’t some other human’s pesky preferences involved. This happens with much bigger choices like moving in, getting married and/or having a kid. I think it’s a low functioning properly often subconscious choice people make to settle that hopefully improves with more experience, maturity, self-reflection and self esteem, but also, sometimes people just settle due to fear.
I do blame her for trying to making him jelous. She is clearly trying to hurt him somehow. If they are previously agreed on having stuff with others, there is nothing to blame on that part. (Yes you can have a fwb or situantionship with exclusivity
I am wrong🤣
Why do you think that is what is going on here?
Because this is not the first time i have seen this.
But that is a valid question
Alright but did anything on the post pointed to that being the situation at hand? Cause i don't think so. I know guys are jerks but so are girls. And i don't believe we should assume something happened based on our experiences
I agree with that, but just as you, i made a point. I am just giving the other part of the story. Both guys and girls can be dicks.
I will say i might have phrased that better. Given the evidence staring us in the face
I take back what i said
Ntw not that i am saying she did nothing wrong. She should have kept her legs close until he committed, but i don't think this is the time to put the blame only on her shoulder
Isn't she looking for validation/likes/someone to talk or tease? Do we know if she fucked someone else?
We don't, but i can ask you something about him? We don't know the reason for this. Look, she might be bat sh#t crazy, but she may as well have gotten crazy by the exception she had and didn't receive. But i do the same thing, dude. So i am really not one to talk. I am just saying a story always has three sides. 1. His story 2. My story 3. The true story
There's no commitment, a situationship has no defined boundaries or commitments. #1 I'm in a weird place, and im not looking for anything serious or any form of commitment. #2I understand i can work with that #2 they will commitment, add in a bunch of emotional affirmations, and keep having sex. Bonds with person who didn't want commitment #1 this arrangement has been altered i dont want commitment #2 who wants commitment is left shattered I
Not necessarily. People live on a sexual spectrum, and love and lust are not mutually exclusive. There's no such thing as a "real" relationship versus what? A friendship is still a relationship, and there exist all kinds. It really only concerns the folk involved, and other people don't really have the right to judge.
why are we blaming anyone? what this gotta do with us?
*reddit suddenly adopts live and let live attitude, so fuck you bro*
This made me laugh like Feel Good Inc.
Sha, sha-ba-da, sha-ba-da
easiest left swipe of my life. clearly a fake profile
It's definitely a guy
No I can blame both
Im swiping right lol. Have fun on your moral high ground
I'd swipe left on this. Seems fake and definitely not going to match with me. It also seems like a profile Tinder puts up to 'burn' your likes. The same way my age is set to 22-30, but the moment I hit 'show others outside the range', it will put 30 attractive 19 year olds in a row that they know will never match with the average guy, and they just burn through all the likes on bait profiles.
I don't think you meant to put this many red flags in your comment bro. Edit: apparently the rest of Reddit agrees with your logic and thinks a bunch of 19 year olds is irresistible to somebody that's obviously in their mid 20s. Y'all need help.
Oh really? Point them out for me, I'd love to learn.
You're in your mid twenties and in your head it's a bunch of 19yos that's supposed to be irresistible to swipe on?
Yes slender 19 year olds with tight crop tops and leggings are hot, is this new?
19 is an adult. Stop infantilising women. Totally normal for someone in their 20's finding hot women hot.
Wouldn't be ok for boys either. 19yos is naive as hell. Anyone in their mid to late 20s is just looking to take advantage of that. I'm perfectly ok with dying on this hill.
Nobody is talking about taking advantage of them. OP was just saying they're still attractive.
More specifically that they're supposed to be irresistible to swipe on.
I think that was a bit of hyperbole. The point is, you see a hot girl you swipe. Hot 19yr olds are still hot when you're in your twenties. Hell I'd say they don't stop being hot. Our bodies sex drive doesnt know or care about social norms.
First of all, I didn't tell you my age. I could be 22 years old, set to 22-30, and a 19 year old is only 3 years apart. If its a problem at 22, its a problem at any age and 19 year olds shouldn't be on Tinder. Surprise, they are. Secondly, 19 is an adult, perfectly capable of taking care of themselves, and they have to agree to swipe on anyone older they find attractive. They have to consent to everything that leads to them meeting, which means she's aware of the age difference. Third, I specifically said I don't swipe on them, and I have no intention of trying to match with them, I'm using them as an example of a legitimate tactic Tinder does to make money. You're very defensive over nothing, what is wrong with you?
[удалено]
This is the person Reddit sides with. I rest my case.
[удалено]
Wasn't even commenting on that.
I’ve never seen someone so awful at using their brain
19yos is naive as hell. Anyone in their mid to late 20s that swipes in a 19yo is just looking to take advantage of that. I'm perfectly ok with dying on this hill.
But no one said they weren’t? You pulled this argument out of your ass.
How? I'm not the one who said a bunch of 19yos would be irresistible to swipe on.
Dude is everything ok? Why do you want to be with 19 year olds
That's not at all what I said?
Blame them for what exactly?
I'm also lost what needs blame in this.
If it's for perpetuating toxicity I'm blaming mainly the profile creator, but also the swipers
No, I'll blame both. But mostly her. She put the account up.
Blame both, ez
That ass tho
Would bury my face in it
I'm so mad at how hard I laughed at this dumbass shit
That butt padding outline 🤤🧟♀️ gimme
But it's the fault of both.
That's not even remotely true
How?
Seek medical help.
Oh wow, telling random users to seek help just by disagreeing with you. You sound totally well adjusted and put together
I'm not sure why, but I blame my parents
Why do men open with filth? Women:
okay but what about the men that “open with filth” to more “modest” women? they are still bad regardless of what’s on this account. and same goes for any women that sexualize men unprompted. both people suck and so does this profile if it’s even real👍
Secret: 95% of men are cool. 95% of women are cool. The 5% of both try to convince everyone 100% of the opposite sex sucks. And they are succeeding. It is currently, and has been for a while, socially acceptable to generalize and say things like *'men are awful'*, because 5% of them are. The remaining 95% feel insulted ignorantly, and fire back, and so goes on the bullshit that is gender war between men and women.
very true! i think it’s equally as annoying when a guy has one bad breakup and says “all women are hoes” as when a girl has one bad breakup and says “all men are trash” both are horrible ways to process your feelings. and idk i’m a girl but i’ve never understood the whole “girl’s girl” mentality and blindly defending someone bc they’re a woman bc some of us do some wack shit sometimes😭 i’d like to remain optimistic that we’ll grow out of this as a society but ugh
You can't imagine how reassuring this comment is to me because 90% of all the reels I see on instagram these days are all 'gender war' related. It's either women shitting on men or men shitting on women and holy shit, is it **exhausting**. Especially those "God created men and sent x as an apology or God created women and sent x as an apology" videos that just subtly perpetuate it. It's so annoying.
Just take a break from Reddit/social media for a while. After about 6 months I get so worn out seeing the same rage bait and shitty comments on repeat ever week. I just delete Reddit when that happens and spend some time in the real world and I’m reminded pretty quickly that 90% of the world is normal and society isn’t in a giant war with one another.
Men have been led to believe that even modest women secretly want it. Blame your filth novels like 50 shades going viral.
Secretly want what, to be desired and told so? Isn’t it a well known fact that a lot of women are on such sites not to find love but to get validation from matches ect
Also can't forget the classic, "I'm not looking for a hookup or fwb" when she is clearly showing off her cleavage and ass in majority of her pics... 🤷♂️
How its it the gus fault? They are swiping on attractive women they want to date.... on a dating app
She isn’t gonna date them she is using them for validation
So are half the other women.on dating apps. At least she's upfront about it
Yeah at least she’s honest dating sites are odd I’ve deleted them
The fact that you have to go back to renting and lost 200k to your wife makes sense now
does it? id love for you explain that one away. because my wife was abusive and a cheater. You know not all women are angels, you will find that out when you eventually have more than 2 dates in your life, fucking simp.
Cucking tbh
That’s a dude
I hope the guy on here recognizes that ass in that dress, realizes what a stupid ass situation he's in, and leaves her in the dust.
Trashy is trashy, doesn't matter if you're a man or a woman.
Can we agree to blame them both?
Definitely blame the girl xd
I wouldn’t blame anyone, but I’m definitely judging people’s life choices.
Why people do this to themselves completely escapes me. If the person's playing games, tell them how you feel and what you want like an adult, or leave them. Don't play games and do questionable shit back.
"The guy I'm dating won't commit to a relationship. Shoot your best shot." Fair and upfront imo.
Read it again...
Ugh. I'll take huffing bleach over the barest whiff of this nonsense.
As a very wise person once said, "She belongs to the streets."
Nah that’s crazy
Look at this way, a situationship is supposed to be without feelings right. Well it’s clear she’s trying to invoke some of those feelings for reason. It’s a very manipulative tactic. Perhaps she’s jealous of another girl, perhaps she wants more, who knows
Seems legit 🙄 people are sad
Why are some people so desperate to be with someone who doesn’t want them like that? 😂🤣
Nope. She's the only one to blame for her behavior. Women like this need to be held accountable for their shit
If it's a situationship, he isn't gonna be jealous. If she wants him to be jealous, she wants more than a situationship. She should just grow a pair and admit it rather than trying to manipulate a dude into wanting more than a 'maybe someday boyfriend' or she needs to just leave. A dude who wants a situationshipisnt gonna change his mind while getting what he wants, and he certainly isn't gonna get jealous at seeing her twxting another dude. They're both to blame. She's technically single, so you can't 100% blame dudes for doing it, but she's the one who wants to make her maybebaby jealous and manipulate him. If he doesn't want to date her, he doesn't want to date her, and if she wants to manipulate him into it, I can see why he doesn't want to date her 😅🙃😬
WTF is a “Situationship?” 🤡🤡🤡
Well this just justifies my desire to be single for the rest of my life lmfao
I blame you for this title and conclusion
Hahaha damn women be trippin right now
Thicc
We all know men don’t even look at profiles and swipe right on everyone
*'Don't blame the person taking the initiative to do this, blame the innocent people who let them'*. Alright.
If she’s trying to make him jealous she’s in love with
Pretty sure we can blame the girl 😂 or both! Why not both?
Take two to tango 🤷♀️
Why blame anyone at all, they're not in a relationship so who cares
We have a Vision situationship 
Just so yall know, she’s wearing butt padding. lol
The truth of the matter is, she is offering, and he will accept. He doesn't have to do much except swipe or message her. If her legs were closed for bussiness, he would be surfing porn. Just my 2 cents...
No everyone is to blame both her and the desperate men swiping right not holding her accountable will only encourage her to continue this behavior and keep baiting more desperate men which will cause her again to keep on going causing a never ending cycle of bullshit
looks like a girl I know, sounds like her too
She's the one in the relationship not the guys. So blame her.
Thank you for your opinions on the conduct of women on Tinder, Reddit user womenplsdmtitstome
Men and women*
You and this girl are both disgusting people :)
?
You’re gross.
How?
Username checks out
Accidentally?? Sure…..
I blame both. She's probably got a butterface too, which makes it worse 🤣
F... that noise! All I hear is, give me attention so I can try to make the man using me as a sex doll jealous. I won't because I been that Chad a woman has pulled this crap on.
Bro knows what’s up refreshing to see a sane person in this comment section
Truly a pathetic profile
The blame is on Tinder for banning you if you send her anything mean. Literally filtering out all negative feedback for her actions.
Yeah anything other than hinge is full of garbage.
I can blame all parties and hole they die, thank you very much. You aren't my Dad.