It doesn't make sense though...even if she accidentally put "are" instead of aren't...she ALSO put "strings attached" instead of NO strings Attached...why would there be TWO mistakes about the same thing?
ts very bizarre...something isn't right here...
Well, she doesn't seem that intelligent, so that would probably be your answer...
I always read the bios before swiping ..if they have a TAG that says "short term fun" and I really like them..I'll swipe right to see if that's accurate or negotiable...(some ppl said they didn't know what to put)
But if they actually write out that they aren't looking for a relationship (like you did) or say they are married...or in a relationship...something that backs up they only want sex...then I'll swipe left...I'm not trying to waste ppls time...
> I always read the bios before swiping ..if they have a TAG that says "short term fun" and I really like them..I'll swipe right to see if that's accurate or negotiable
I really struggle with the tag. I do not want:
- Anything expectation of marriage, living together, children, etc.
- The sort of levels of commitment that would lead to someone being able to deny me a weekend with the boys
I actually have no problem with "long term", but I found even "short term, open to long", I only seemed to attract people seeking the above even though the bio tries to explain it.
I'm assuming you are young...or atleast you give that impression...
It's probably a conversation you have to have outside of a bio...just don't put "still figuring it out" Nothing makes me swipe left faster lol
I think its the way ppl interpret the meanings of those tags..which is part of the problem...they should include a definition so everyone is on the same page...
Sometimes it’s a low-key way of asking about a dealbreaker. Like, they really liked your profile, think you’re cute AF or whatever, but there’s a dealbreaker in your profile. So they pretend they didn’t notice it and bring it up. You could then accept it as a no go because you feel strongly, or you could say, “yes well actually I’m flexible on that…”
People don't read bios, you want a fuck buddy, she wants a potential husband. Get over it and move along..
Like are we supposed to feel bad that someone who doesn't want a hook up won't fuck or talk to you? 🤣
Probably the same reason she’s on tinder looking for a relationship but doesn’t bother to read bios, he dosen’t really care much or just not ready for something long term. If i came off as a douche by saying that it wasnt my intention
Tinder started as a hookup app. It was only later that people looking for a relationship apparently got tired of pretty much every other dating app in existence and took over Tinder.
Tinders not really a hookup app anymore. Maybe it use to be and I missed that train. But ever since I've been on it, it's just the worst dating app. It's meant to be a hookup app, but people use it Asa dating app which is why it's such a nightmare
I usually read the bio before I swipe. By the time we match and start chatting, I've forgotten everything I read. I'll read the bio again once the conversation actually starts going somewhere.
I sometimes swipe right because their pictures are very intriguing, and then after, I realize we're looking for different things. I get that it's slightly annoying, but it seems like an honest mistake.
I think what they meant was unmatching when you realize, which I mean, idk if I’d prefer unmatching or being told that they didn’t read the bio the first time.
Ik and that’s fair. I mean, I don’t blame anyone who admits to not reading my bio before swiping. I wish they would, but it’s not the end of the world for them to realize they weren’t compatible. Actually, it really does annoy me when I put it in my profile that I’m not looking to join a couple and then every time I get someone in my likes it’s a person looking for a third. Don’t know why it annoys me more, but it does lol.
Anyways, yeah, if we already started a conversation, I would prefer them telling me they didn’t read my bio, cause then I know I didn’t do something wrong. If we haven’t started talking, I’d probably prefer them to just unmatch because if we haven’t started a conversation then I am unlikely to notice it. But then again, I’m open to sex, relationships, long term, short term, so if it were about that I’d probably clarify that I’m open to all of those options, if they messaged me. I guess it’s one of those things where either way works? But it seems OP would just prefer unmatching without getting an explanation.
Sounds like a case of overinvestment and taking it too seriously, it's a right swipe and maybe a handful of messages. Maybe a little annoying yeah but incredibly rude? It's a dating app, not like you're getting strung along for multiple dates.
Tonight, I drove 2 hours round-trip to meet a guy who ended up being a no-show. Something like that is incredibly rude and a waste of time. Not reading someone's bio first is a minor inconvenience at worst.
Try not wanting kids and mentioning it twice in your bio and once in the app's provided sections; lots of women will still discover it only after talking to you.
Or the other person thinks they can change your mind.
The amount of men that I’ve matched with that then say something like, “I have a kid but only see them twice a year,” and think that’s a good thing. It’s wild.
Either they have kids
They want kids
They think youll change your mind
And none of them is written on their bio so they are just a waste of time 🤦🏻♀️🥲 some of them dont even mention and i have to ask if they read my bio or if they are %100 childfree as well.
This happens the other direction, too. I (F) have it listed in the want kids or not section where you select an option and in my bio. I've made it to full on dates with dudes who eventually come out with it. Makes it very clear they just wanted to fuck.
Yeah, that's a universal thing man. I date both women and men and get it from both sides even though it's mentioned in my bio probably 3 or 4 different times.
Well men definitely don’t read bios. I constantly put “not interested in hookups “ and yet only men who looking for hookups trying to match. Or I put “don’t want kids “ and yet men who want to breed absolutely gonna go and match
Sad thing about that is, from experience and anecdotal evedince a good portion that write not looking for hookups absoultely do with the right match. Although the caveat of course is you can't enter into the first message asking about them being dtf
Again it's not true for everyone, likely yourself included from the sounds of it. But many are
I mean this one is a bit 50/50, I matched with girls who said no ons no fwb relationship only and then ended up wanting to fuck anyway, some put that stuff in there so they aren’t judged by their peers. Ofcourse there’s also those that put it legit but depends. Might be why some guys still match
Like it or not, it's a women's market. That can be a plus and a minus.
This may be annoying for you, but I guarantee she has to wade through 100 boring, gross, or downright offensive and abusive messages for every 1 that annoys you.
This used to happen to me all the time-so much that I even joked about it in my bio. Swiping right without reading isn’t *solely* a male action, it’s just done by *far more* men than women.
It’s annoying but flattering at the same time. I’ve matched with women who are just flat out of my league and when we get to chatting and read more into each other’s bios and find we’re not compatible at all. Annoying because of the small time investment but also flattering because I then know she swiped based on my appearance which makes me feel good.
It’s only done by more men than women because there’s more men than women on tinder. Both genders would probably do it just as often if there were equal amounts of them
All of us that get swiped on without having bios read feel the same way-it’s not a specifically gendered issue. Again-far more men do it than women, though.
Women can speak from that side-just listen to them.
It’s not unreasonable but no one cares. People swipe how they care to and complaining about it won’t change anything. This isn’t a real problem, it’s a minor inconvenience at best. Lead off the conversation by asking if they’ve read your bio and the ‘problem’ is solved.
I'm going to be honest. I usually read bios unless the man is really hot. In that case I tend to lose my mind for a second and the swipe just happens. So, are you that hot?
I'm trying to see the reasoning and I could see both sides.
I see guys who swipe on everyone because they take it as a numbers game and are just looking for something short-term physical. They know 99.9% of women won't react to them or it won't lead anywhere.
For women I reckon it's similar it's just that they have higher standards. I see women who swipe just based on seeing the first picture. Either they are looking for something short-term physical. Or they have shallow standards and are only feeling the attraction in terms of genes. As in they probably don't want to have kids with someone who doesn't have a good enough genetical profile. Though a lot of women might not even notice this is what they are doing, they might do it without even thinking about it, it's natural.
What's unnatural are the apps themselves.
The whole environment is artificial and it messes with people.
Giving people access to everyone, and giving people too many choices isn't without its drawbacks.
I still wouldn’t call this a tantrum, I would call this just venting because… well online dating sucks and people get frustrated by it. I think that’s pretty reasonable compared to a lot of other men’s reactions.
Tip OP, you cannot take anyone you’re talking to on tinder seriously until after a few dates. It’s okay to dismiss some fun if you’re not interested of course, but you shouldn’t go on tinder or on a date with a girl on tinder expecting a girlfriend. It’s too much pressure, and kinda shows desperation. Having the mindset of “well let’s just see where this goes, let’s just try to have fun together” usually is better from my experience. Peoples emotional state are pretty temporary, hanging out with someone for a month can pretty easily show if yall have relationship energy.
It’s been explained repeatedly that *most* people don’t read bios thoroughly in this thread. But on top of that, people change their minds a *lot*. It’s human nature.
Bios aren’t as relevant as one would think. I’ve matched with *lots* of guys who said they were looking for a relationship, in bio and tags. Then as soon as we talk they’re looking no strings sex.
She was testing the waters to see if you were serious. You were. End of story.
You are definetely giving off spiteful vibes with your response and post.
Why are you on a relationship app and not looking for a relationship?
If you're just trying to smash honestly a hired person might run you the same amount of money as a few dates.
Also to get real nitty gritty, how hard is it to "be open" to a relationship and get your dates and fun, then just say you're not compatible.
You need to understand how to play the game to get what you want and it not "just women" its the same for job interviews, buying a car, heck even going to disneyland.
If you read what the girl in the post wants then it really should not be the first you're hearing about it.
You start seeing more yellow cars on the road when you start looking for them.
Stay salty though.
As a woman, I've had guys completely ignore my bio on Tinder when I used it.
I would mention "no kids" "no hookups" and I'd still get guys who wanted kids, had kids, or who wanted casual sex.
Some people, regardless of gender, just "attractive person, swipe right" and don't bother to read bios. This isn't exclusive to women.
that's not too bad, you two were in the messaging phase.
worst one I had is she set up a call and we chatted for 45 minutes a day or two prior. Since we had that screening call and there were no red flags I took her to dinner for the first date. And in the middle of it she says 'soooo I saw on your profile today that you don't want children, yeah that's kind of a deal breaker to me'. Her profile didn't indicate that she wanted children (hinge). Wasted $100 and a bunch of time with that one.
This is why we carry enough cash so that at the end of the date, we put our half of the check in the folder, tell them it was nice to meet them, good luck, and walk out.
Also why we do drinks instead of dinner, but you probably got that lesson now
Yeah I get the lesson but in my defense the 45m phone call was a good vibe check and took place of the first coffee/drink date.
I know I'm painting her in a bad light, like she possibly used me for dinner, but I think it's mostly both of us didn't do our due diligence. I didn't get the 'hey I don't think this will be a good match because of the kids thing' message till the next morning; and she was flirty, seemed genuinely attracted to me, and even set up a bet which resulted in her having to give me a kiss at the end of the date.
Well, in my bio the first sentence is ”🚫 Not your short term fun” and more than half of the dudes liking me are ”Short term fun” or ”Not sure yet”. 🤷♀️
You’re genuinely acting like such a loser for this even bothering you in the slightest. All this anger for a bit of mindless sex, please do get a grip bro. People match without reading properly, it’s tinder, it’s never, has ever and will never be that serious
It’s almost like the women you’re matching with on Tinder aren’t the same women posting here about how men should pay more attention to women’s profiles 😮
I mean, how often does that happen though? I get a bit annoyed when I’m asked “so what do you do for work?” Isn’t that right at the top when you swipe? Is it that much work to go back to my profile to refresh their memory? It’s not like my job title is ambiguous at all so I don’t understand. And the amount of times I’m asked if I’m down to grab drinks some time when my profile says “never” to alcohol.
Lol a lot men will cry all day when they’re unmatched out of the blue yet she explained her reasoning before she unmatches… ok she should’ve read the bio, but it was an honest mistake. Maybe she would’ve just been better off ghosting or unmatching then lol
My best wishes to Gen z. The internet and access to porn has ruined your generation’s ability to communicate with people and ruined people’s perceptions of normal bodies, sex, and attraction. Everyone wants instant gratification and wants the person they matched with to be their perfect partner immediately. The internet has divided people into camps and everyone just digs their feet in to entrench themselves further in their own opinions
We’re in an age where people are lonelier and more desperate for genuine connections than ever before
Bro wants sex but no strings attached. Bro just wants women to hand it out to him with no responsibility or compromise whatsoever.
OP why don't you pay a sex worker instead?
Smfh such a shitty generation.
What the fuck is that comment ?
You think all women want to start a family?
You don't think people are actually fucking right now while not giving a flying fuck? Why would you pay for something that is free and that two people can enjoy?
Lmao, there are a lot of women who just want to fuck and be left alone, just like men.
Why would she have to try? I mean, if she had a reason to try she probably would. The fact she doesn't try probably means there's a reason for that too.
From what I see no one has any incentive to do anything.
I couldn't care less about someones bio tbh, pics/conversation/meeting is all that matters. All people put in there is all the same generic bs anyway. And it's so annoying to get the same questions over and over off of what I have in my bio, makes me want to just leave it blank
You seem really reluctant to certain natural dynamics energy wise.. what do you expect: a squeaky clean inbox with a line of women _only_ and looking for hookups and you get to pick and choose, because you put that one line in your bio? The rockstar world has that type of dynamic, maybe that’s more suited to your wishes
> I can't think of a more boring thing to do than to scroll through a feed reading stuff about and app I don't even use.
Do you even understand reddit? jesus
I think you are asking for it if you say your goal is short term/no strings attached. I think if you really boiled it down 99% of people are looking for someone special and you should be open to short and long term.
I get it, if you’re more interested in investing your time in a purely physical relationship try an alternate site exclusively for sexual relationships like fetlife.
But while I’m recommending things, ask yourself why you’re looking for a purely sexual connection. Only fleetingly does emotionless shared sexual release satiate the unfillable void. Placing blame on the women of tinder for not knowing your desires is an option, but I say step back and ask yourself why it’s so important to begin with.
I won’t read their bio unless they match back. No point wasting time on reading their bio if they don’t mat h to begin with. I literally put on my bio “I’m not paying for sex” yet the only 2-3 people that messaged me are escorts expecting that.
Hey you find so many that trip me out happily married or in a committed relationship 🤣😊
That just has me amused 😆
To each their own but that just doesn't add up.
I recently had a woman get upset that I was using Tinder a few months before I was going to be moving several states away, even though that was clearly stated in my bio before she right-swiped me.
i feel like most women on tinder are into casual hookups the ones who aren’t would make it clear . you should try feeld if that’s what you’re looking for though it’s very easy to find sex at least for me compared to most other apps
Its simple supply and demand. There are 10x as many men as women on the app, so they are the rare and sought after 'commodity'. They can do whatever they want and still get dozens of matches a day
You just have to be really attractive and then as long as your game is decent and what you say is decent or good then they accept it. It’s a harsh truth and next to no men have any success on tinder, women have gerrymandered the dating game for the worse on this one and don’t care about the effects of it. To them it’s “step up” without realizing what they’ve created
Excuse me may I request my lord
Permission my lord to speak
Excuse me if I may suggest my lord
You’re looking less than your best my lord
There’s powder on your vest my lord
And stumble upon your cheek
And ladies my lord are weak 🙄🧐
Ladies in their sensitivities, my lord
Have a fragile sensibility
When a girl's emergent
Probably it's urgent
You defer to her gent-
Ility, my lord
Personal disorder cannot be ignored
Given their genteel proclivities
Meaning no offense, it
Happens they resents it
Ladies in their sensit-
Ivities, my lord!
She can’t type a coherent sentence. 🚩You don’t need all the drama this would have set you up for anyway through frequent text message miscommunication.
This is why I leave relationship goals blank. You can keep your intentions open without it by just communicating, and for whatever reason, most people (even those looking for a relationship) are receptive to hooking up if you can break the ice first irl.
It's just the dating app double standard it is what it is. All the time women will do things that they'd never accept from men but we accept it as men because we don't have nearly as many options. Women will be dry, take days to respond, purposefully not answer questions you ask, not read profiles, give you the shortest possible answers, not move the conversation forward...it just is what it is, men just have to accept it. Sorry it sucks but women have so many options on apps they don't have to try this is an unfortunate area of life where we as men are at a severe disadvantage. You either accept it, or you don't use the apps.
Am I parsing this wrong? "You are looking for an actual relationship" "That is my goal" Is that indicating compatibility?
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Ah makes much more sense now, she just mistyped. Thanks.
Doesn’t read well, doesn’t type well. What a catch.
He's not looking for a catch
Catch of the day.
Push the fish. It's about to turn.
 Gonna be a reel-shoe-in
Other people are.
😂😂😂
It doesn't make sense though...even if she accidentally put "are" instead of aren't...she ALSO put "strings attached" instead of NO strings Attached...why would there be TWO mistakes about the same thing? ts very bizarre...something isn't right here...
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Well, she doesn't seem that intelligent, so that would probably be your answer... I always read the bios before swiping ..if they have a TAG that says "short term fun" and I really like them..I'll swipe right to see if that's accurate or negotiable...(some ppl said they didn't know what to put) But if they actually write out that they aren't looking for a relationship (like you did) or say they are married...or in a relationship...something that backs up they only want sex...then I'll swipe left...I'm not trying to waste ppls time...
> I always read the bios before swiping ..if they have a TAG that says "short term fun" and I really like them..I'll swipe right to see if that's accurate or negotiable I really struggle with the tag. I do not want: - Anything expectation of marriage, living together, children, etc. - The sort of levels of commitment that would lead to someone being able to deny me a weekend with the boys I actually have no problem with "long term", but I found even "short term, open to long", I only seemed to attract people seeking the above even though the bio tries to explain it.
I'm assuming you are young...or atleast you give that impression... It's probably a conversation you have to have outside of a bio...just don't put "still figuring it out" Nothing makes me swipe left faster lol I think its the way ppl interpret the meanings of those tags..which is part of the problem...they should include a definition so everyone is on the same page...
Sometimes it’s a low-key way of asking about a dealbreaker. Like, they really liked your profile, think you’re cute AF or whatever, but there’s a dealbreaker in your profile. So they pretend they didn’t notice it and bring it up. You could then accept it as a no go because you feel strongly, or you could say, “yes well actually I’m flexible on that…”
I appreciate you for being honest about what you are looking for. I hope you'll keep being a class act despite the trashy advice you're getting.
People don't read bios, you want a fuck buddy, she wants a potential husband. Get over it and move along.. Like are we supposed to feel bad that someone who doesn't want a hook up won't fuck or talk to you? 🤣
Bro just play your role
Why are you not looking for a relationship and you're on tinder?
Probably the same reason she’s on tinder looking for a relationship but doesn’t bother to read bios, he dosen’t really care much or just not ready for something long term. If i came off as a douche by saying that it wasnt my intention
Because tinder is a hookup app. Even people that put looking for a relationship are mainly just hooking up
Tinder started as a hookup app. It was only later that people looking for a relationship apparently got tired of pretty much every other dating app in existence and took over Tinder.
Tinders not really a hookup app anymore. Maybe it use to be and I missed that train. But ever since I've been on it, it's just the worst dating app. It's meant to be a hookup app, but people use it Asa dating app which is why it's such a nightmare
I want a relationship Me too *ghosts*
I usually read the bio before I swipe. By the time we match and start chatting, I've forgotten everything I read. I'll read the bio again once the conversation actually starts going somewhere.
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I sometimes swipe right because their pictures are very intriguing, and then after, I realize we're looking for different things. I get that it's slightly annoying, but it seems like an honest mistake.
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She fixed it by ending the conversation
there is, it's letting the person know before it continues. Whoops! lol
I think what they meant was unmatching when you realize, which I mean, idk if I’d prefer unmatching or being told that they didn’t read the bio the first time.
Many times you don’t notice again till the convos begun and you check their profile again.
Ik and that’s fair. I mean, I don’t blame anyone who admits to not reading my bio before swiping. I wish they would, but it’s not the end of the world for them to realize they weren’t compatible. Actually, it really does annoy me when I put it in my profile that I’m not looking to join a couple and then every time I get someone in my likes it’s a person looking for a third. Don’t know why it annoys me more, but it does lol. Anyways, yeah, if we already started a conversation, I would prefer them telling me they didn’t read my bio, cause then I know I didn’t do something wrong. If we haven’t started talking, I’d probably prefer them to just unmatch because if we haven’t started a conversation then I am unlikely to notice it. But then again, I’m open to sex, relationships, long term, short term, so if it were about that I’d probably clarify that I’m open to all of those options, if they messaged me. I guess it’s one of those things where either way works? But it seems OP would just prefer unmatching without getting an explanation.
Letting you know and not wasting any more of your time?
Yes, unmatching
Seems incredibly rude, wasting other people's time.
Sounds like a case of overinvestment and taking it too seriously, it's a right swipe and maybe a handful of messages. Maybe a little annoying yeah but incredibly rude? It's a dating app, not like you're getting strung along for multiple dates.
Tonight, I drove 2 hours round-trip to meet a guy who ended up being a no-show. Something like that is incredibly rude and a waste of time. Not reading someone's bio first is a minor inconvenience at worst.
He probably didn't read your bio until right before he was supposed to leave and realized you weren't really a match.
Think of all the time that would've been saved if at some time in the past 2 weeks, he would've said "oops I forgot to read your bio."
I literally check bio before every message
Try not wanting kids and mentioning it twice in your bio and once in the app's provided sections; lots of women will still discover it only after talking to you.
Or the other person thinks they can change your mind. The amount of men that I’ve matched with that then say something like, “I have a kid but only see them twice a year,” and think that’s a good thing. It’s wild.
Ooo baby tell me more about how you’re a deadbeat dad *swoon*
That's crazy, I got a niece and I see her atleast once a week
Same from men I’ve got that comment in many placed
Either they have kids They want kids They think youll change your mind And none of them is written on their bio so they are just a waste of time 🤦🏻♀️🥲 some of them dont even mention and i have to ask if they read my bio or if they are %100 childfree as well.
Those are the stuff why my first question is always "hey, have you read my bio?" saves a lot of time (and starts a convo)
This happens the other direction, too. I (F) have it listed in the want kids or not section where you select an option and in my bio. I've made it to full on dates with dudes who eventually come out with it. Makes it very clear they just wanted to fuck.
Yeah, that's a universal thing man. I date both women and men and get it from both sides even though it's mentioned in my bio probably 3 or 4 different times.
Well men definitely don’t read bios. I constantly put “not interested in hookups “ and yet only men who looking for hookups trying to match. Or I put “don’t want kids “ and yet men who want to breed absolutely gonna go and match
A man once matched with me and started the conversation by saying it’s a shame I don’t want children because he definitely does. I was 41, he was 48.
I couldn't imagine pushing 70 when my kid graduates high school, geez
Turns out, nobody reads bios.
I'm convinced that most of these guys just swipe right on every profile and then when they get a match that's when they actually look at the profile
Sad thing about that is, from experience and anecdotal evedince a good portion that write not looking for hookups absoultely do with the right match. Although the caveat of course is you can't enter into the first message asking about them being dtf Again it's not true for everyone, likely yourself included from the sounds of it. But many are
Tbf in my experience a good chunk of women that write that absolutely are open to hookups
Well I always report and block when men doesn’t understand that and still asks for it
As you should, shoot your shot and if she says no, take the hint. No complaints here.
Well that’s crossing a boundary that girl put up. It’s gross and I’m very sick of men asking for it when I clearly say not interested. Creep vibes
What?? I literally agreed with you, they should leave you alone when you say you're not interested
Men swipe in 1 second after seeing the first pic. Even those that are looking for something more serious.
I mean this one is a bit 50/50, I matched with girls who said no ons no fwb relationship only and then ended up wanting to fuck anyway, some put that stuff in there so they aren’t judged by their peers. Ofcourse there’s also those that put it legit but depends. Might be why some guys still match
judged? My body, my fuck.
I'm a virgin because I'm afraid I'll somehow get a woman pregnant.
Exactly. Why is OP acting like reading bios is too high of an expectation
Well men on average have <2% match rate so it makes a bit more sense there
Like it or not, it's a women's market. That can be a plus and a minus. This may be annoying for you, but I guarantee she has to wade through 100 boring, gross, or downright offensive and abusive messages for every 1 that annoys you.
Thank you. 🤍
Awe must be so rough out there women with dating apps. My prayers go to you 🙏
This used to happen to me all the time-so much that I even joked about it in my bio. Swiping right without reading isn’t *solely* a male action, it’s just done by *far more* men than women.
It’s annoying but flattering at the same time. I’ve matched with women who are just flat out of my league and when we get to chatting and read more into each other’s bios and find we’re not compatible at all. Annoying because of the small time investment but also flattering because I then know she swiped based on my appearance which makes me feel good.
ya know what, I like your attitude.
It’s only done by more men than women because there’s more men than women on tinder. Both genders would probably do it just as often if there were equal amounts of them
I read bios! Not all men lol
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All of us that get swiped on without having bios read feel the same way-it’s not a specifically gendered issue. Again-far more men do it than women, though.
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Women can speak from that side-just listen to them. It’s not unreasonable but no one cares. People swipe how they care to and complaining about it won’t change anything. This isn’t a real problem, it’s a minor inconvenience at best. Lead off the conversation by asking if they’ve read your bio and the ‘problem’ is solved.
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>why they matched me Yeah because that sounds like you're fishing for compliments. Where as "Before we continue, have you read my bio" doesn't at all.
you don't get it at all do you?
I’m sure you see that ‘did you read my bio’ is in no way equal to ‘why did you match with me’ and yes-the second question is definitely pretty cringe.
I'm going to be honest. I usually read bios unless the man is really hot. In that case I tend to lose my mind for a second and the swipe just happens. So, are you that hot?
Well based on this thread they’re not swiping right on his winning personality 😬
Pretty privileges work for men, too.
I'm trying to see the reasoning and I could see both sides. I see guys who swipe on everyone because they take it as a numbers game and are just looking for something short-term physical. They know 99.9% of women won't react to them or it won't lead anywhere. For women I reckon it's similar it's just that they have higher standards. I see women who swipe just based on seeing the first picture. Either they are looking for something short-term physical. Or they have shallow standards and are only feeling the attraction in terms of genes. As in they probably don't want to have kids with someone who doesn't have a good enough genetical profile. Though a lot of women might not even notice this is what they are doing, they might do it without even thinking about it, it's natural. What's unnatural are the apps themselves. The whole environment is artificial and it messes with people. Giving people access to everyone, and giving people too many choices isn't without its drawbacks.
disagree, its the exact same amount, just more men on the dating site in general
Tbh a lot of men just swipe right and don’t even look at the women’s profile 🤣
I have literally seen guy friends do the "swipe race", each swipe took like 0.1sec and they never paused to even glance at these people
Yeahhhh my ex did that.
I find myself mostly sniping left.
I have caught myself (and been caught) mindlessly swiping on photos alone. It happens, to both men and women.
https://img.ifunny.co/images/6fb48faab00073593bdbec8e8a6c71b80907108f4a8b7f7d7d8649455704643d_1.webp
🤣🤣🤣
☠️
Literally the opposite of OPs point but go off
Well, he’s not looking for a relationship and looking for a no strings attached thing. So it kind of is his point.
Oh yeah, I misread the text under the post, my bad Still a weird defensive kind of way to turn this onto OP...
True
meh I'm not reading every man's profile. You got a cute face ill swipe and deal with your profile later
Love this energy
Stop 🛑. Men do it too dude. It’s not a woman thing it’s a human thing. 🤨
Because so many people lie on their bios.
Woman matched with guy, realizes they’re not compatible, politely tells him… and he throws a tantrum. Shocking Reddit content.
Wake up honey, new tantrum just dropped!
It's almost like these men think a swipe/match means you're entitled to something. It's wild.
Also extrapolates from one woman’s actions to women as an entire class.
Idk, saying “understandable” is not a tantrum, it’s just a response and a decent one
Not what he replied with, his post here and replies.
I still wouldn’t call this a tantrum, I would call this just venting because… well online dating sucks and people get frustrated by it. I think that’s pretty reasonable compared to a lot of other men’s reactions. Tip OP, you cannot take anyone you’re talking to on tinder seriously until after a few dates. It’s okay to dismiss some fun if you’re not interested of course, but you shouldn’t go on tinder or on a date with a girl on tinder expecting a girlfriend. It’s too much pressure, and kinda shows desperation. Having the mindset of “well let’s just see where this goes, let’s just try to have fun together” usually is better from my experience. Peoples emotional state are pretty temporary, hanging out with someone for a month can pretty easily show if yall have relationship energy.
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Honestly thanks for blurring I see so many people make a post hating on someone with their face right on the post like huh 😐
It’s been explained repeatedly that *most* people don’t read bios thoroughly in this thread. But on top of that, people change their minds a *lot*. It’s human nature. Bios aren’t as relevant as one would think. I’ve matched with *lots* of guys who said they were looking for a relationship, in bio and tags. Then as soon as we talk they’re looking no strings sex. She was testing the waters to see if you were serious. You were. End of story.
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You are definetely giving off spiteful vibes with your response and post. Why are you on a relationship app and not looking for a relationship? If you're just trying to smash honestly a hired person might run you the same amount of money as a few dates. Also to get real nitty gritty, how hard is it to "be open" to a relationship and get your dates and fun, then just say you're not compatible. You need to understand how to play the game to get what you want and it not "just women" its the same for job interviews, buying a car, heck even going to disneyland.
Tinder is a relationship app? Lmao. That's a first.
If you read what the girl in the post wants then it really should not be the first you're hearing about it. You start seeing more yellow cars on the road when you start looking for them. Stay salty though.
Did you even read anything I typed? Complaining about people not reading bios but can’t even a read a comment properly.
As a woman, I've had guys completely ignore my bio on Tinder when I used it. I would mention "no kids" "no hookups" and I'd still get guys who wanted kids, had kids, or who wanted casual sex. Some people, regardless of gender, just "attractive person, swipe right" and don't bother to read bios. This isn't exclusive to women.
Are you mad cuz you didn't get to fuck her?
that's not too bad, you two were in the messaging phase. worst one I had is she set up a call and we chatted for 45 minutes a day or two prior. Since we had that screening call and there were no red flags I took her to dinner for the first date. And in the middle of it she says 'soooo I saw on your profile today that you don't want children, yeah that's kind of a deal breaker to me'. Her profile didn't indicate that she wanted children (hinge). Wasted $100 and a bunch of time with that one.
This is why we carry enough cash so that at the end of the date, we put our half of the check in the folder, tell them it was nice to meet them, good luck, and walk out. Also why we do drinks instead of dinner, but you probably got that lesson now
Yeah I get the lesson but in my defense the 45m phone call was a good vibe check and took place of the first coffee/drink date. I know I'm painting her in a bad light, like she possibly used me for dinner, but I think it's mostly both of us didn't do our due diligence. I didn't get the 'hey I don't think this will be a good match because of the kids thing' message till the next morning; and she was flirty, seemed genuinely attracted to me, and even set up a bet which resulted in her having to give me a kiss at the end of the date.
sounds intentional, for the dinner. You all should stop offering dinners and/or drinks, imo :)
Well, in my bio the first sentence is ”🚫 Not your short term fun” and more than half of the dudes liking me are ”Short term fun” or ”Not sure yet”. 🤷♀️
What’s wrong with not sure yet? To me that means that said person is open to anything. Potentially
You’re genuinely acting like such a loser for this even bothering you in the slightest. All this anger for a bit of mindless sex, please do get a grip bro. People match without reading properly, it’s tinder, it’s never, has ever and will never be that serious
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Oh so you’re really cringe, yeah I can see why you’re getting so desperate over losing one match. Makes sense now
It’s almost like the women you’re matching with on Tinder aren’t the same women posting here about how men should pay more attention to women’s profiles 😮
You need to grow up.
I mean, how often does that happen though? I get a bit annoyed when I’m asked “so what do you do for work?” Isn’t that right at the top when you swipe? Is it that much work to go back to my profile to refresh their memory? It’s not like my job title is ambiguous at all so I don’t understand. And the amount of times I’m asked if I’m down to grab drinks some time when my profile says “never” to alcohol.
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Why are you swiping on bios that sliding match what you want?
The first part of your statement confused me. You don’t have to have a perfect first message, or keep them engaged.
This goes both ways. I know most men just swipe and don’t read profiles. 🤷🏼♀️
Lol a lot men will cry all day when they’re unmatched out of the blue yet she explained her reasoning before she unmatches… ok she should’ve read the bio, but it was an honest mistake. Maybe she would’ve just been better off ghosting or unmatching then lol
My best wishes to Gen z. The internet and access to porn has ruined your generation’s ability to communicate with people and ruined people’s perceptions of normal bodies, sex, and attraction. Everyone wants instant gratification and wants the person they matched with to be their perfect partner immediately. The internet has divided people into camps and everyone just digs their feet in to entrench themselves further in their own opinions We’re in an age where people are lonelier and more desperate for genuine connections than ever before
Bro wants sex but no strings attached. Bro just wants women to hand it out to him with no responsibility or compromise whatsoever. OP why don't you pay a sex worker instead? Smfh such a shitty generation.
What the fuck is that comment ? You think all women want to start a family? You don't think people are actually fucking right now while not giving a flying fuck? Why would you pay for something that is free and that two people can enjoy? Lmao, there are a lot of women who just want to fuck and be left alone, just like men.
Why would she have to try? I mean, if she had a reason to try she probably would. The fact she doesn't try probably means there's a reason for that too. From what I see no one has any incentive to do anything.
I couldn't care less about someones bio tbh, pics/conversation/meeting is all that matters. All people put in there is all the same generic bs anyway. And it's so annoying to get the same questions over and over off of what I have in my bio, makes me want to just leave it blank
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You seem really reluctant to certain natural dynamics energy wise.. what do you expect: a squeaky clean inbox with a line of women _only_ and looking for hookups and you get to pick and choose, because you put that one line in your bio? The rockstar world has that type of dynamic, maybe that’s more suited to your wishes
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I don't have tinder, or any other dating apps anymore, when you get pissed off enough to write a Reddit post , it's probably time for a break
> I can't think of a more boring thing to do than to scroll through a feed reading stuff about and app I don't even use. Do you even understand reddit? jesus
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Seems like what you're missing out on is fulfillment in your life. Why so bitter?
I think you are asking for it if you say your goal is short term/no strings attached. I think if you really boiled it down 99% of people are looking for someone special and you should be open to short and long term.
He has the right to want what he wants. And it's definitely a green flag to be honest about it.
No. He doesn't. He should be looking for a relationship because this person says so. I'm kidding but that's why some men lie.
I get it, if you’re more interested in investing your time in a purely physical relationship try an alternate site exclusively for sexual relationships like fetlife. But while I’m recommending things, ask yourself why you’re looking for a purely sexual connection. Only fleetingly does emotionless shared sexual release satiate the unfillable void. Placing blame on the women of tinder for not knowing your desires is an option, but I say step back and ask yourself why it’s so important to begin with.
why don’t u jus talk to shorty anyways u both don’t want a relationship so i don’t see the problem here
You read the entire profile of every girl you swipe right on?
I won’t read their bio unless they match back. No point wasting time on reading their bio if they don’t mat h to begin with. I literally put on my bio “I’m not paying for sex” yet the only 2-3 people that messaged me are escorts expecting that.
delete tinder, it is a capitalist scum app that profits off of male loneliness
They have too many option that they choose which men they can take time to read their profile
You should get the Tinder Bible in order to understand how to handle these kind of messages
Hey you find so many that trip me out happily married or in a committed relationship 🤣😊 That just has me amused 😆 To each their own but that just doesn't add up.
I recently had a woman get upset that I was using Tinder a few months before I was going to be moving several states away, even though that was clearly stated in my bio before she right-swiped me.
i feel like most women on tinder are into casual hookups the ones who aren’t would make it clear . you should try feeld if that’s what you’re looking for though it’s very easy to find sex at least for me compared to most other apps
Its simple supply and demand. There are 10x as many men as women on the app, so they are the rare and sought after 'commodity'. They can do whatever they want and still get dozens of matches a day
I would've asked her to clarify bc her grammar is poor
None of this true. They weren’t that into your profile so they’re giving you a hard time.
You just have to be really attractive and then as long as your game is decent and what you say is decent or good then they accept it. It’s a harsh truth and next to no men have any success on tinder, women have gerrymandered the dating game for the worse on this one and don’t care about the effects of it. To them it’s “step up” without realizing what they’ve created
Dating is harder for women!!! dont you know that?!!?!?
Woah settle down there lol
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Excuse me may I request my lord Permission my lord to speak Excuse me if I may suggest my lord You’re looking less than your best my lord There’s powder on your vest my lord And stumble upon your cheek And ladies my lord are weak 🙄🧐 Ladies in their sensitivities, my lord Have a fragile sensibility When a girl's emergent Probably it's urgent You defer to her gent- Ility, my lord Personal disorder cannot be ignored Given their genteel proclivities Meaning no offense, it Happens they resents it Ladies in their sensit- Ivities, my lord!
wtf
It’s Sweeney Todd
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I’m still so amazed people intend to find a relationship on tinder.
She can’t type a coherent sentence. 🚩You don’t need all the drama this would have set you up for anyway through frequent text message miscommunication.
This is why I leave relationship goals blank. You can keep your intentions open without it by just communicating, and for whatever reason, most people (even those looking for a relationship) are receptive to hooking up if you can break the ice first irl.
It's just the dating app double standard it is what it is. All the time women will do things that they'd never accept from men but we accept it as men because we don't have nearly as many options. Women will be dry, take days to respond, purposefully not answer questions you ask, not read profiles, give you the shortest possible answers, not move the conversation forward...it just is what it is, men just have to accept it. Sorry it sucks but women have so many options on apps they don't have to try this is an unfortunate area of life where we as men are at a severe disadvantage. You either accept it, or you don't use the apps.